


Falling For You ~ Narry Storan ~ Part 2

by Harrysbabylou



Series: Falling For you [2]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Anal Sex, Babies, Drama, Fun, Love, M/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-11-28 14:35:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 40
Words: 223,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18209606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Harrysbabylou/pseuds/Harrysbabylou
Summary: The second part of Niall and Harry's love story.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this was not supposed to happen but I have been feeling really unsettled since ending part one. 
> 
> I was going to be doing a few bonus chapters for it but I kept getting loads of ideas the I wanted to do so doing a part 2 book made more sense. 
> 
> Hope you all enjoy X

Niall drops to his hands and knees, peaking around the corner of the sofa before crawling as fast as he can to the toy unit in the corner of the room. He sits there for a while with his back flat to the wood, legs tucked as close to his body as he can listening until the sound of little feet go past him. Once the coast is clear he rolls over to the art table set up in the other corner and shuffles underneath. 

Matthew is already there, laying on his back with his knees tucked up holding his phone above his face as he flicks through his Instagram. Niall settles with his head in Matthews lap, poking at his belly.

"You're cheating." Niall scoffs crossing his arms over his chest. 

"I am not cheating. I'm just making it more exciting, now be quite before she hears us." 

"I have been under here for half an hour mate, she thinks adults can't fit. She wont find us." Niall lays he leg out flat for a second so he can rub at his knee before quickly drawing it back in again. 

Somewhere in the house there is a load of commotion that he is sure sounds like Liam. 

"One more down, who's left do you know." 

"Harry, Zayn and Cassie. Louis got bored in the first five seconds and showed himself. Such a pussy." Matthew smirks dropping his phone to look at Niall.

"You would think this is an Army drill not hide and seek with a four year old." There is another shout followed by the sound of grumbling from Zayn and a loud laugh from Cassie.

"Just us and Harry then." Matthew whispers, titling his head back to see if he can see anyone coming their way.

Niall starts fiddling with the bottom of Matthews Motley crue top, lifting it up slightly to reveal the tanned skin there. Matthew tuts before slapping his hand away. 

"This is boring. I'm gonna move again." Niall slides out from under the small table quietly humming Mission Impossible to himself as he army crawls towards the hallway.  
He jumps to his feet when he finds it empty moving with his back to the wall, ears straining for any footsteps heading his way. 

He had lost to Zayn last week and he refuses to do it again. Zayn is the worse winner in the world. 

"Arghh!" A hand slaps over Niall's mouth as he is dragged into the closet under the stairs, hands frailing around in a panic. 

"Jesus Niall! Shut the hell up maybe." Nialls bats Harry's hand away spinning round to glare at him.   
"Don't give me a heart attack then arsehole. Gonna kill me." Harry giggles into his hand before grabbing hold of Niall's shirt to pull him closer. 

"Wanna make out like we are naughty school boys." Harry waggles his eyebrows, hands sliding up to the back of Niall's neck.  
"Yeah. This what you done when you where at school? Get on ya knees for all the boys in the janitor closet?" Harry presses their lips together tugging on Niall's brown locks.  
"Don't forget the girls." Niall laughs into Harry mouth, shoving him back until he hit the wall.  
He deepens the kiss slotting his leg between Harry's his hands pressed flat to the wall either side of his head.  
Harry sighs hands softly moving over Niall's back, hips bucking up against Niall's thigh. 

Niall cock gives a small twitch but before he can get too into the door is ripped open. 

"Dad! Uncle Niall and Harry are kissing again!" Harry grones, head falling back into the wall with a thud as Niall laughs stepping back to smile down at Rae. 

"Ah, Little monster you have found us." 

"Why do you guys always have to he kissing in front of my daughter? She is four." Zayn appears in the doorway, frown on his face as he takes in the pair standing huddled up with his coats. 

"Like you and Matthew don't kiss." 

"Yeah but we don't look like we are gonna bust a nut as soon as we touch each other." Harry raises his eyebrows pushing his way out of the cupboard, Rae instantly attaching herself to his leg so he can drag her about the house. 

"Actually Sir I will have you know-" Niall is interrupted by Liam suddenly crashing into the hallway looking frantic. 

"Niall, River has gone into labour." 

"Holy crap, she still at home?" Nialls heart starta slamming in his chest and he was at the front door on a flash shoving his shoes back onto his feet. He patted his pockets looking for his phone then remembered leaving it on his bed this morning whilst getting dressed.  
"Shit." 

"No Macy has taking her to the hospital already, she said her contractions are really close together and they think the baby will be here really soon." Harry is next to Niall now shoving him out the door and towards the car.

"So stupid leaving my bloody phone at home, and I suppose everyone else turned theirs onto silent while hiding. She is two weeks overdue so of course she is going to go into labour while I'm crawling around playing hide and bloody go seek when I should he at home with her." Harry huffs out a laugh backing out of Zayn's driveway.

"Babe it's fine. The hospitals not that far and Macy is with her." 

"Yeah but it's supposed to be me. She wanted me there to like cut the chord and shit" Harry reaches across for Niall's hand a massive grin in his face. 

"Stop smiling, I'm letting my friend down here!" 

"Yeah but love there is about to be a fresh little baby. And they are going to be living with us for a bit. Fresh baby everyday." Niall blinks at Harry before shaking his head.

"Just speed up yeah." 

Xxxxxxxx

Niall and Harry's shoes squeak and echo down the hallway as they run towards the maternity unit. 

Niall holds his finger down on the buzzer pressing his face into the glass of the door to see if he can spot River or Macy inside. All he can see is a reception desk and a load of doors. 

"Name please?" Niall jumps at the crackly voice, snapping his head back towards the intercom.

"It's Niall Horan, I'm here for River Peterson."

"Are you family Sir?" Niall rolls his eyes in annoyance.

"I'm her birthing partner." There is silence for a moment, making Niall shuffle about and shoot ann impatient look to Harry.  
Finally after what felt like way to long the door buzzed and clicked open. 

Niall quickly kissed Harry then rushed into the maternity unit a midwife already making her way towards him.

"Niall! She is very excited you made it on time. She has been pushing for three minutes now and babies head is about to crown we think. She is doing wonderfully, like wonder woman." 

Niall is not sure what he was expecting to find it feel when walking into a room where a woman is giving birth. Maybe screaming and lots of blood and a traumatic experience that will forever make him glad he is not a woman. 

What he didn't expect was to come across such a calming environment. 

The room was dark, only a small lamp by the bed given out light. Music was playing softly in the background and River was sat in a large birthing pool, head tilted back and the rest of her floating as she took some deep breaths. Another midwife was crouched on the floor on the opposite side of the pool talking in a soft voice to River. Macy was laying on the floor behind Rivers head stroking her fingers through her long brown hair. 

It was the most calming place Niall had ever been and he instantly wanted to cry. 

"Hey baby girl." Niall whispered dropping to the floor by Rivers head, Macy shuffling back to make room for him. 

"Hey." River's eyes closed and she planted her feet back onto the floor of the pool her face screwing up slightly. 

"Ok, looks like we are ready for another push." Niall looks around nervously but everyone still seems pretty calm so he just takes the hand River has held up from him and presses his lips to the side of her head as she tenses up. 

She doesn't even make a sound is the thing, she just pushes with her face scrunched up and that's the only sigh that she is actually pushing a baby out of her body. Niall is absolutely floored by how amazing she is and he has only been in the room seconds.

"So good baby girl. Look at you being all awesome." 

"River, can I just ask you to push one more time, really hard this time." River nods before tensing up again a small grunt leaving her as she puts in extra effort. Niall can't believe he is actually here for this moment. 

That not long ago he was playing hide and seek with a four year old and a bunch of grown ups and now he was here watching a baby be born.  
Isn't life funny. 

"River if you reach down you will be able to help baby the rest of the way." Niall sits back and watches with wide amazed eyes as River bends forward into the water, hands diving under the surface. Nobody else is involved, it's just baby and mother. Macy lays her head on Niall's shoulder and the two midwife's smile as River let's out a sob, hands touching her baby for the first time. 

"Oh my god." It's really is not anything like he imagined as he watches River hold what they can now see is a boy up to her chest.  
"Oh my god look Niall. Oh I love him so much already." Niall laughs leaning closer to the pair his hand hovering unsure if can touch or not.  
"He is beautiful." Macy whispers, head peaking over the other shoulder. 

And the thing is he is beautiful. He is covered in this horrible gunk and a little blood and he just came out of a place Niall does not want to think about. But he is so beautiful and Niall already has an overwhelming need to protect him and make everything so good for him.

"Who is cutting the cord?" River looks up at Niall. Her face is red, blotchy and tired but she looks so beautiful and radiate.  
"Niall is." Niall takes the scissors the midwife hands to him, terrifying looking things, and holds then to the part of the cord the midwife has held up for him. 

"This is your uncle Niall." River speaks softly as Niall closes the scissors successfully cutting the cord, his heart stuttering because that's her mummy voice. It's his crazy River and she is cuddles up with her baby and she sounds like a mum. He passes the scissors back feeling more then relived it's over with, to be honest he had expected some disaster but nothing so far has been what he had expected.  
"He is going to love you so much, almost as much as mummy because he is love. All of him." Niall strokes his finger softly over the babies head not even caring about the mess all over him. He just wants to scoop him out of Rivers arms and cuddle him. 

"We just need to take baby for some checks." River looks up a pout on her face.

"Ok, but be real quick because I really love him." The midwife chuckles bending down to take baby. 

"Watch them Niall please." Niall nods getting to his feet so he can hoover around the two midwife's in the corner of the room as they do their stuff. 

Once they are done they wrap him in a blue blanket and put a little blue hat on his head before laying him down in a little bed. 

"He is so small." Niall stays by the little bed as the midwife's go back over to River. 

He can hear them all talking but pays no attention, he just can't stop looking at the baby. He is awake, face a little grumpy but he is still and quite. 

When he turns back to River she is standing up in the pool an uncomfortable look on her face. It takes Niall a few seconds to realise they are working on getting her placenta out.  
He is quick to turn back to the baby.  
"Oh mate I do not need to see that do I hey, better off looking at you. Just about the cutest thing ever. Maybe even cuter then your uncle Harry, and that is some extreme level of cute my little buddy but you have managed it." He makes a little gurgling noise, little eyes opening for a second before screwing shut again.  
"Oh man have I just fell in love again, welcome to life mate. It's a pretty good one you got yourself into let me tell you that. So many people are going to love you. It's a big family full of some pretty wierd people." Niall crouches down a little so he can get closer.  
"I'm going to make sure nobody ever makes you sad. Gonna make you laugh and love so much. You got the best mummy too, she is superwoman just so you know. Your uncle Harry is going to be so ridiculous around you. I can't wait to see that. We got some good times ahead of us fella and I'm so glad we get to share them with you." He startles slightly when Macy drags her hand over his shoulder, pulling him in to kiss his cheek.  
"You alright?" Niall nods reaching down to place a finger against his cheek.  
"He is so perfect Macy. How do babies manage to be so perfect?" Macy sighs gentle turning Niall's head to face her.  
"You and Harry, you will get this Niall. I promise you will both get this one day." Niall nods, swollows away the lump in his throat. This moment is a happy one, it's not the time for Niall to think about that small missing piece in his and Harry's life.  
"This will do just fine for now. This will do just fine."


	2. Chapter 2

"Right lads, let's fill ourselves with food so we can spend the rest of the night filling ourselves with booze!" Louis words are followed by a load of cheering that did not suit the calm environment of the restaurant they where currently sat in. 

Niall catches Harry's eyes from across the table where he was wedge between two of Louis work colleagues and they both shared a smile. 

"Louis, didn't you only propose a month ago?" Niall has no idea who asks the questions, he just knows it's not one of his lot. 

"I did Cal, but my lady is a fast planner so here we are, stag night tonight and wedding next week." Everyone cheers again and Niall is sure they would all react the same if he announced he was going for a piss.   
He looks up at Harry again who is hiding his smirk behind his hand. 

"You know tonight's going to get messy with this rowdy lot." Liam speaks from next to him.

"Tell me about it. Shouldn't we be the wild ones? We are the young party goers right?" Liam shrugs.   
"Man I don't know, I think I used up all my party animal lifes in uni. After two years of being constantly drunk and a surprising amounts of threesomes I am ready for early nights after watching EastEnders." Niall chuckles flicking at the straw in his glass.   
"You're practically an old man now Liam. Do you think it's working in advertisment that aged you?" Liam shrugs looking around at everyone before turning back to Niall.  
"No definitely all the booze and sex." 

Their food finally comes and Niall enjoys watching Harry stare down at his greasy burger in horror. Obviously Louis favourite restaurant only served the greasiest food known to man. Niall can practically hear Harry working out the amount of years he could shave of his life with it. 

"Hey can I ask you a question?" Liam asks picking at some of the chips on his plate.  
"Course." Niall can feel Harry's eyes on him but has no idea if he can actually hear Liam and Niall talking over the noise of everyone else. He can't wait until they move on to doing the pub crawl so he can tuck himself back into Harry's side.   
"When you where traveling you like had a lot of sex right?" Niall stiffens slightly and tries his hardest not too look up at Harry.  
"I wouldn't say a lot, but yeah and?"   
"Well, do you think it was a good thing in the end? Like if you had never left and you and dad stayed together do you think you would have been curious to find out what it was like with someone else? Would it have bortherd you that you had only been with one person?" Niall gets a really bad feeling in his gut as Liam speaks.   
"Why? are you starting to feel that way?" Liam pops a chip into his mouth and chews looking thoughtful.   
"Don't know. Maybe?" Niall sneaks a look at Harry then. He looks casual still, taking small bite of his burger so Niall doesn't think he can hear. 

"Liam, you have something really good with Macy. Don't fuck it up. Like you said you and her would have threesomes at uni yeah, so really you have slept with other people."   
"Well I didn't actually have sex with them, it was just kissing and touching you know. It was our rule, we could have other people there because that was hot but neither of us could have sex with them because it was too much of a risk that one of us couldn't cope with it." Liam takes a sip of his drink and eats another mouthful of food before continuing.

"When you traveled Niall you just got to have sex with whoever you thought looked good."

"Well it wasn't exactly like that mate. I had sex when I wanted to yes, but it's not like I was doing it multiple times a day. And I would have traded every single person for your dad in a heartbeat. I would rather have spent them fours with him trust me. And if I was with him when I went away I wouldn't have so much as looked at another person that way. Macy is fucking amazing and you are both so in love. Don't be a dick head Liam because I swear I will beat the shit out of you if you fuck her about." Liam just blinks back at Niall before nodding and turning back to his food. Niall was breathing heavily the idea of Liam thinking things that could really hurt Macy was getting him worked up. Niall pushes his chair back getting to his feet. Zayn looks up as he passes his face concerned as he watches Niall go into the men's bathroom. The room is empty so Niall just leans against the sinks and takes some deep breaths eye clenched tightly shut. 

His emotions are something he still struggles with, but it's not like when he was sixteen and angry at the world for taking his mum. He didn't need to go around punching walls or starting fights or popping pills. Now it was more like an extreme pressure in his chest that made him feel like he was either going to puke or start screaming, and he had learnt how to breath through it and get his head settled. 

He was protective of all his friends. He absolutely loved them all to an extreme so Liam talking like he was had really triggered him.

Macy was a part of his family, if Liam done anything to split them up then Niall was not sure if Macy would stay as being apart of that. He couldn't cope with losing anyone. 

"Niall?" Niall opened his eyes, stepping away from the sink as Harry steps inside closing the door behind him.   
"You ok beautiful?" Niall turns the cold tap on, scooping up some water and slashing it over his face, hoovering over the sink as the water drips off his skin. "Hey," Harry comes up behind him, hands rubbing over his back. "You're ok love. I got you." Harry gently turns him until he can tuck his face into his neck, not caring about his shoulder getting damp. 

Feeling Harry and smelling Harry is already making him feel more settled. 

"You want to tell me what you and Liam where talking about before you stormed off?" 

"No, I don't think he would want me to."   
"He is alright though yeah?"  
"Yeah. Yeah he was just being a bit of a dick." Harry pulls Niall closer into him, lips brushing over his cheek as he backs them into a stall.

"What you doing?" Harry closes and locks the door behind them smiling cheekily at Niall before dropping to his knees.   
"Harry, god you don't know what's on the floor." Harry laughs, working Niall's jeans open.   
"I'm about to suck your dick and you're thinking of my knees. Should I be worried?" He pulls Niall's dick out, still soft, and wraps his lips around the tip.  
"No. No you don't have to be worried, shit." Niall leans forward, hands pressing into the walls of the stall behind Harry as he sinks down, eyes closing and moaning around Niall as he grows hard in his mouth. 

This was Harry's normal reaction to finding Niall having a bit of a panic. Giving him a mind blowing orgasm seemed to bring him out of the dark cloud he was in. Niall was pretty sure just hugging him for a bit would have the same effect but this was definitely his preferred method.   
"Feels good love, uh fuck so good." One of his hands moves down to tangle in Harry's hair, tilting his head back a little to change the angle before he snaps his hips forward only a little at first to test Harry. Harry just moans his hands dropping from where they where clutching onto Niall's waist and tucking behind his back.   
"Good boy, such a good boy for me." He moves his hips more, fucking into Harry mouth moans constantly falling loudly from his lips as he slams into the back of Harrys throat. He can hear the wet sound and can feel Harry throat tighten when he gags and chokes around Niall's cock and it drives him wild, makes him fuck into his mouth faster knowing Harry would tap out if it was too much. 

Harry's head bangs into the stall wall so Niall's grips his hair tightly to keep it there. He loves the idea of Harry going back to the table with messed up hair and a wreaked mouth for everyone to see. He runs both hands into his hair now, tugging harshly to purposefully mess it up. 

He hopes nobody comes in because there is no way he could stop when it feels this good. But then he thinks that could be kind of hot, someone coming in and hearing how good Harry was making Niall feel. The would probably be able to hear the wet sound of Niall's cock moving in Harry's mouth, would definitely pick up on the gags from Harry. They would know that they where in here, that Niall had Harry on his knees choking on his cock.   
"Getting close. Fuck I'm gonna come, so good." Harry moves his hand from behind his back to yank down the back of Niall's jeans and his boxers pushing a finger between his arse to tease around his rim. 

Niall cries out spilling into Harry's mouth. Harry looks up to make eye contact as he swollows, gagging and spluttering a little as he struggled to take it all down with Niall's cock still pushed to the back of his throat. 

Niall waits until he has come down. When his head clears and his dick starts to soften in Harry's mouth. Harry waits patiently, hands stoking over Niall's thighs until he finally steps back, dick slipping out of Harry mouth.   
Harry takes a couple of deep breaths before getting to his feet a content smile in his face and his dick hard in his pants.

"Feel better?" Niall huffs out a laugh, tucking himself back into his boxers.   
"Feel amazing. Your mouth is sinful, thank you I love you." Harry blushes a little leaning forward to peck Nialls lips.   
"Love you too." Niall zips up his jeans as Harry tries to flatten his hair back down.   
"Want me to do you?" Harry shakes his head unlocking the door.  
"No I'm fine. I plan on fucking you later." Niall can definitely get on board with that. 

When they go back to the table Louis laughs loudly and claps Harry on the back. Matthew gives Niall a knowing look and Liam mostly ignores him. Niall still has a bad feeling about Liam but he can deal with it.

Xxxxxx

The first pub they went into was quite full and rather loud so Niall slipped outside to give River a quick call and check how her and the other girls where getting on.

It had been just over a week since she gave birth to baby Nolan and this was the first time she had left the house and as it was an overnight stay she was a little nervous, so was Niall to be honest. 

"What's up loser, bailing out already? Need the ladies to come collect you?" Niall rolled his eyes at all the giggling in the background.   
"No you arse. Just wanted to make sure you and Nolan where good." Niall smiled politely at a girl who had been watching him since he stepped outside, turning his back to her slightly hoping she got the hint.   
"We are doing great hun, Rae is just finishing up one of her Barbie films then then we will settle them down for the night. How's the stag?"   
"Good. Loud. Louis works with a wierd bunch. Can the others hear me?" River told him to hang on a second while she moved. The pub door opened and closed behind him with a bang.   
"What's up." Niall kicks at the wall with the toe of his shoe.  
"Do you know if Macy and Liam are doing ok? He has been saying some stuff that's getting me a little worried."   
"Yeah? Well as far as I know they are good. You want me to do some digging?"   
"Yeah, if you can without her getting suss over it. I'm sure it's just me being paranoid." A lighter clicks right behind Niall's ear making him jump and spin round, a cloud of smoke drifting over his face. Zayn smiles at him before offering him his cigarette.   
"I shall try my hardest babes, now you get back to the partying ok. Love ya." Niall plucks the cigarette out of Zayn's fingers.   
"Love you too. Hope Nolan sleeps well." Niall hangs up placing the cigarette between his lips, his shoulders relaxing as he inhales.   
"What's going on with Liam and Macy?"  
"Nothing." Zayn pulls a new smoke out of his pocket, looking over as a group of woman walk past laughing and heels clicking loudly.   
"Must be something if your making phone calls and smoking. You only smoke when you are stressed. Talk to me." Niall sighs, leaning back onto the wall. Zayn shuffles closer until their sides are pressed together.   
"I think Liam is thinking about cheating on Macy. Or leaving her maybe. I don't know."   
"Shit. Is he stupid?" Niall shrugs, turning his head to the side as he blows out.   
"I don't know, he was being all wierd at dinner. Saying stuff about me sleeping with other people before settling down with Harry. He has been thinking what it would be like with someone else." Zayn huffs shaking his head.

"He should talk to her. Matt, he kinda has this thing about watching me with other people." Niall raises his eyebrows. Zayn and Matthew where so mushy and madly in love he really couldn't imagine Matt enjoying watching Zayn with someone else.   
"We don't do it much and sometimes its just something small like going to a club and he watches me dance with people, flirt and make them think they have a chance. Other times he likes me to bring them home if the kids are not there and they fuck me while he watches. Joins in sometimes too. Maybe Liam should suggest that to Macy. She might surprise him, and at least he is being honest and talking to her about it." God, Niall can't even imagine being that secure in himself they he could let Harry be with someone else. Could he? No he was sure he would just getting too jealous and cause some shit. 

"They used to have threesomes and they had like this agreement in place that they couldn't actually have sex with the other person, said they might not be able to cope with it after. So I guess that it's not something she would go for. I just don't know why people have to do shit like that, cheat on someone they love just because they got curious. I didn't think he would be the type." Zayn moves so he is standing in front of Niall, biting down on his lip his finger hooking into the belt loop of Niall's jeans, tugging slightly. 

"I think that's an easy thing for you or me to say. Do we really know how we would feel if we didn't sleep around before Harry and Matt? If you and Harry never split up how do you know that you would not be wondering what it was like with other people? There is no way to know what we would be thinking in Liam's place. He is incredibly lucky, I fucking love Macy and if he had any sense then he will keep his dick to himself, marry the girl and live a happy life." Zayn tugs Niall's jeans again making him come away from the wall and stumble into him slightly. 

"I don't know Z, I don't think I could ever do that. Why would he need to know what it's like with other people? He loves Macy, it's not going to get better then that is it." Zayn smiles fondly down at Niall, bumping their hips together. 

"You're a sweet one Niall. We will keep an eye on him. Let him know I will smash his face in if he fucks her about, that should scare him right?" 

"Maybe a year ago before we knew what a puppy you where." Zayn scowls which just results in him looking more like a puppy then before. 

"Whatever, I'm sexy and tough and will successfully kick his arse. Don't matter how big his arm get, I will win." Niall throws his cigarette to the ground stomping on in.  
"You're very sexy love." Niall taps him on the cheek.   
"Right I'm going in to get my lecture about smoking and drink more beer. Thanks for the chat." He does some wired first bump handshake thing with Zayn and thinks if the girl checking him out before hadn't stopped she certainly would now. 

Harry hands him a beer when he sits down, leaning in for a kiss before stopping face scrunched up.  
"You smoked?" Niall nods grabbing at his pint glass to take a generous sip.  
"You still worked up? Do we need to go to the loos again?" Niall laughs pecking Harry on the cheek.   
"No, was just talking to Zayn and he offered me one. I'm fine love. You having fun?"   
"Yeah. Louis lot are a blast right? Have a feeling they are gonna be hilarious when they get drunk." Niall looks over to Louis, Matthew draped over his back as he talked to his work mates. Zayn walks back in nudging Matthew as he passes him to let him know he is back. 

He looks across at Niall before nodding behind him. Niall turns and sees Liam chatting to some blonde girl, leaning over as she spoke hand resting on her leg.   
He turns back to Zayn who just winks before heading over to the pair and forcing himself between them.   
"You sure everything is alright babe?" Niall shuffles closer to Harry.  
"Yeah. Let get just get tipsy so we can go home and have silly sex later."  
"Oooo I love silly sex." 

Xxxxxx

By the time they get to the third pub things are getting busier and Niall has to grip tightly on to Harry's hand as he leads them to a booth in the corner or he would end up losing him. 

They manage to fit half the group in the booth, the other half leaning against the bar shouting out drink orders.

Zayn is perched on Matthews lap, messy haired and rosey cheeked now that the alcohol was taking effect. It was his turn to drink and he had no plans to hold back apparently. 

Harry keeps his hand tucked into Niall's, his eyes starry and wide, his body relaxed. He had managed to sneak Niall back into the dirty toliet at the last pub and fingered him until he came. He had yet to come himself but knowing he had made Niall come twice already seemed to be enough for him. 

Niall made sure to keep an eye on Liam, who had conveniently perched against the bar right next to a group of girls. Zayn was now useless in his mission to keep Liam's dick inside his pants and nobody else seem to suspect anything was off so now Niall was alone with the task. 

As the drinks where passed around Harry strikes up a conversation with a bloke called Mike who taught History and loved to garden. Harry would probably be talking to him for hours if Niall let's him. Louis was leaning against Niall's back, fingers moving over his head, and he decided to let him carry on as it was his night and he looked very happy to be petting him. 

A green fruity looking drink was placed down in front of Niall so he pushed it towards Harry grabbing at a pint instead.   
He never really caught on to the kind of drinks Harry had, usually drinking through a little straw while wearing a face masks and watching some romantic comedy. God he loved him.

At some point before they move on to the next location Zayn gets even more pissed, Liam has dragged a girl away from her friends and she has joined their group, Niall is leaning heavier against Harry's side pleasantly buzzed but not quite drunk, Harry has made more friends by bonding over his many hobbies, Louis is now wearing a princess crown and a pink fluffy tutu, Matthew is smiling sweetly at some bloke who is trying to keep a conversation going with Zayn and Niall wonders if Matthew is going to let Zayn fuck this poor bloke or punch him in the face.

It's a good night really. .

Xxxxx

After another five pubs they end up in a club and Niall finally gives in and has one of Harry's ridiculously camp drinks. He will refuse to admit it taste quite nice actually and just hopes it doesn't mix funny with all the beer is his stomach and make him throw up nasty coloured vomit. 

Zayn is now completly gone into his own world's, dancing with his arms flapping in the air but still managing to look rather sexy. 

Louis and Matthew are screwing up pieces of napkins into little tiny balls and trying to throw them into the hair of some girls sat in front of them.

Harry is mouthing wetly at Niall's neck and he thinks he is mumbling in his ear about another trip to another disgusting toliet to make him come again. And Niall does like that idea, of course he does it's Harry and he would let Harry make him come again and again all day if he could. Right now though he needed to focus on Liam.

Liam who was a little drunker then Harry but not drunk enough to have an excuse for the way his hand is moving up this random girls leg. 

Harry tries his luck again, this time reaching around to grab at Niall's crotch.   
"Hey love," Niall turns his head so he can press his mouth to Harry ears to be heard over the music. "Don't want to come anymore yeah, gonna let you fuck me later and I want to be desperate enough to make a mess of us." That seems to please Harry who smiles brightly cheeked turning rosy as he lets go on Niall's dick pressing a kiss to his nose. 

Louis comes over at some point in the night to place a crown on Niall's head before cupping his face in his hands and squeezing his cheeks together.

"You make a pretty Irish princess." Louis actually looks emotion for a second, like Niall really does make the prettiest princess and he can't quite handle it. 

"Dance princess!" Louis yanks Niall's hand and Niall has just enough time to grab at Harry as he is dragged towards the dance floor. 

Zayn cheers loudly when he spots them, pointing towards Louis before motioning him forward with his finger  Harry wraps himself around Niall from behind both of them falling into a rhythm easy enough as Louis and Zayn just kind of bounce around occasionally pulling each other into theirs arms and leaving sloppy kissing over faces and shoulders. 

Matthew turns up with some glow stick and wands, a pair of fairy wings on his back and Niall wonders where all this stuff keeps coming from. After that it's all jumping and too loud singing with the wrong words but it's fun and Niall has all the people he loves around him having just as much fun. 

It also ridiculous and Matt keeps zapping people with his wand and at one points hits some poor bloke in the side of the head, and Louis pretends he gets turned into a bird and snacks someone else across the face when he flaps about. Zayn falls at one point and it takes them far to long to realise he in on the floor and no longer dancing but it's fine because he is laughing. 

Then for some reason YMCA starts blaring out which is perfect and they all stand in a line screaming out the words and doing the moves and he is sure they look as cook as they feel. 

It takes Niall an hour to remember he is supposed to be watching Liam, and a awful lot can happen in a hour so his body jolts with panic and he is racing away from the group unnoticed. 

Liam is not at the bar but Niall finds some of Louis workmates so he asks them if they have seen Liam. It takes longer then he has and he has to describe Liam about a hundred times before one of them finally remembers who Liam is and tells Niall he went to the tolites a little while ago.

Niall gives them all a thumbs up, fed up with shouting over the music and makes his way to the corridor that leads to the tolites. 

It's a little quieter here, between then red walls of the corridor and Niall's ear are ringing slightly. He feels good, on a bit of a high as he walks with his finger tips running across the wall. Sober Niall would never touch the walls of a club, apparently drunk Niall does not have the same concerns for his health. 

When he walks into the men's room it takes him about five seconds, which really is quite long when you think about it, to realise that what he is looking at is actually random girl on her knees sucking his best friend's cock. 

It's not until Liam gasps and his hips jolt forward as he comes that Niall let's out a sound. 

"Oh my god." Nialls words slur together and it's not even from alcohol it's from the shock.  
"Oh my god." The girl looks completely unfazed as she leans back wiping at her mouth. Liam on the other hand looks like he has just been caught killing someone. He shoves himself back into his jeans while stumbling towards Niall face frantic and drained of colour. 

"You can't tell her Niall, you can't." Niall shoves him away before stepping forward to punch him in the face. Liam goes down easily body smacking into the floor. Niall is shaking, absolutely shaking and is hot with how angry and disappointed he is. 

He thinks for a second he might throw up but then the girl is leaving looking completely uninterested in the drama and Liam is trying to get back up still mumbling about Niall keeping this to himself so he swollows it down.

"Fuck you arsehole. You're such a fucking prick." Niall turns on his heel and leaves, Liam calling out his name as he goes. 

He run across the bar area knowing that Liam is following him. He is a bit aggressive when he pushes through the crowd of dancing bodies but he can't bring himself to care. He just wants to get to Harry and get away from Liam. 

He keeps thinking of Macy. Back at Zayn and Matt's house watching the kids and that makes him want to turn back to Liam and hit him again, not stop this time because he is so fucking annoyed that Liam could do anything to hurt someone like Macy. And so scared that Macy might leave now and Niall really doesn't really deal with losing people so well. 

Zayn spots Niall first, his face falling as he sees the look on his face. Niall shakes his head once letting Zayn know to just leave it. 

He grabs Harrys arm yanking him away from everyone and towards the door. 

They have jackets that they both left at the cloak room but he thinks one of the others will think to check and grab them. If not he will just buy Harry two more to make up for it. 

Harry looks confused but doesn't ask Niall anything about what's going on as they stand on the pavement trying to get a taxi. 

"Niall." Niall let's go of Harrys arm so he can grab at Liam's shirt instead, backing him up until his back slams into the brick wall if the club.  
"Don't fucking talk to me. I don't want to hear you voice right now and I don't want to see you stupid face. I swear to god Liam I am so close to beating the shit out of you".

"Babe, I got us a taxi." Harry sounds nervous eyes flicking between the two. Niall drops his hands from Liam's shirt, shoving him again before stepping back and getting into the taxi, Harry hesitates for second looking at Liam before getting in after Niall telling the driver the address. 

"What happened?" Niall shrugs Harry's hand off him.  
"I don't want to talk about it." Niall shakes his head, grits his teeth and turns away from Harry to look out the window.   
"You're really angry Niall. What did Liam do?"   
"Just leave it Haz, just wanna get home. Want you to fuck me." Harry swollows then nods sitting straighter in his seat.  
"Alright, then you're going to tell me what the hell my son done to get you so wound up."   
"Fine. Sorry, I love you." Harry just nods, taking Niall hand letting him squeeze as hard as he wants the whole drive home. 

Xxxx

Niall kisses are frantic, his hands ripping at Harry clothes and scratching at his skin as the stumble into the bedroom. 

"Don't want you to prep me, just lube. Want to feel you as much as I can." He is yanking his jeans off kicking them away with his feet as Harry works on his own.   
"Ok, yeah fuck." They are both sticky with sweet from the club, the smell of smoke still on Niall's skin from the second smoke he had while talking shit with Zayn, and their movements are a bit sloppy from alcohol. None of that matters though, not when they are finally naked and spread out on the bed and all Niall can hear is the slick sound of Harry rubbing lube over his cock letting out little breaths as his hand moves over himself. Then Niall's legs are being pushed apart and up a little and all he can feel is the tight push of Harry's cock sliding into him, tight and hot. Harry moans loudly, because he is been on edge all night after watching and tasting Niall twice, and because it's such a tightness around his cock when Niall has not been opened for him. 

"Fuck baby." Niall grabs at Harry shoulders bringing him down a little so he can push their lips together, so he can just breath him in as he moves inside him.   
"I love you." Harry nods, bites down on Nialls bottom lip and tugs.  
"Love you too." Niall brings his legs up higher wrapping then around Harry's back enjoying the slight burn as he feels himself stretch around Harry cock.   
"Harder, want you to fuck me harder." Harry reaches up with one arm to hold onto the headboard snapping his hips forward harder, faster and deeper. Niall moans hips lifting up to meet Harry's, head falling back into the pillow. Harry leans down and kisses at his exposed neck, teeth nipping and tounge swirling over the milky white skin, Niall shivering and gasping under him. 

Harry's eyes shut and his mouth falls open when Niall purposefully clenches tighter around him. The burning sensation has gone but Niall finds himself missing it, is trying to chase it and get it back.   
"Harry, need it harder." Harry grunts before pulling out completely. Niall whines but then Harry is grabbing him and turning him onto his stomach. He pulls Niall's legs out flat before grabbing at his arms and holding them behind his back with one hand. It makes his shoulders pull a little and one of Harry's rings is digging into his back where he is holding Niall's wrist down, but it's what he needs and Harry probably knew that and it makes Niall's chest swell.

Harry uses his free hand to part Niall's cheeks a little before lining himself back up and slamming back inside Niall in one go. Niall cries out back arching and his body acting on instincts trying to get away from Harry. Harry tightens his grip, yanking Niall's arms making him cry out again and go still.   
"God, yes, so fucking tight. This what you wanted baby?" Niall sobs nodding his head before burying his face into the blankets tears running down his face. 

He loves this. Loves that Harry doesn't hold back anymore like he did before. When he thought Niall was just an innocent kid.  
He loves that when Niall asks for it Harry gives him what he needs and more. 

Harry starts fucking into him faster, punching a moan out of Niall as he fucks him into the mattress.  Niall feels himself right on the edge, Harry is hitting his prostate dead on each time but he needs more to get him there. With his cock trapped between him and the bed he can't do anything about it so has to stay dangling until Harry decides he can.

By the time Harry starts coming Niall is a wreak. He is sobbing into the bed, face soaked with tears and everything feels so good like he is on fire and flying all at the same time. 

Harry pulls out lifting Niall up onto his knees so he can wrap his hand around his cock.   
Niall comes with a shout spilling over Harry's hands and the blanket beneath him, Harry's name repeatdly leaving his mouth as his come drips from his hole running down his leg.  

They are both panting when they fall onto the bed, Niall landing straight in his own come but not really caring. He looks over at Harry, skin glistening with sweat, chest red and his cock still half hard between his legs. 

He imagines he looks in a worse state. Once their breathing had calmed Harry reaches across for Niall's hand and turns his head to look at him. Niall sighs looking down at Harry's large hand covering his. 

"Liam cheated on Macy tonight." Harry sits up on his elbows.  
"What?" Niall nods, swollows then turns onto his side, wincing at the jolt of pain that went from his arse up to his back. 

"Yeah. You know that girl that joined us at some point? In one of the pubs?" Harry frowns as he tries to remember then nods.

"Found her sucking his dick." Harry looks distraught as he looks down at Niall.

"I don't understand, why would he do they? Oh my god poor Macy." He falls back onto his back, hands covering his face.   
"Jesus. I'm gonna kill him. I didn't raise him to act like that. Fuck." Niall nods smiling sadly.  
"It's pretty messed up. I'm not sure what to do now. Like do we tell Macy? Do we make Liam tell her? Or do we keep our mouths shut and trust him to not do it again?" Harry gets up off the bed running his hands over his hair.   
"I don't know. What did he say at the restaurant to upset you." Niall gets off the bed too starting to strip the bed. He knows that when the others come back they will all pile into bed with them and he doesn't need them laying in his and Harry's come.   
"He was talking about how he has been thinking about what it's like to be with other people. Apparently that's why I'm so happy to settle down with you, because I got to fuck about first." Harry winces at that but starts helping Niall strip the bed.

"So what, he thinks he needs to do the same before committing to her?" Niall shrugs yanking the sheet off the mattress.   
"Not sure. I have no idea what's going on in his head. Maybe he just doesn't love her anymore and this is his way out." Harry pauses his movements looking sad.

"You go get in the shower love and I will make the bed up, I don't want you getting sore." Niall rounds the bed so he can hug Harry's waist.   
"You're not going to blame yourself right? You're a good dad, Liam is just being an idiot." Harry kisses the top of nialls head.  
"No love, this is all on him. Go ahead, I will join in a second." 

They shower quickly then fall back into bed, exhausted and a little sore. 

Niall wakes up a couple of hours later to find Matthew and Zayn on the floor, Louis draped over Harry and Liam curled up by his side his hand tucked into Niall's and a frown on his face even in sleep. 

He hates that he can feel himself start to forgive him already. 

He falls back asleep holding Liam's hand a little tighter.


	3. Chapter 3

Niall places two mugs down on the table before dragging the chair out and sitting opposite Liam. 

"How am I supposed to tell her?" Niall wraps his hands around his mug tucking it to his chest. It was still really early, Niall had probably only gotten about four hours sleep before Liam had shaken him awake. Other then looking tired and upset Liam looked fine, he obviously was not drunk like Niall thought he was. Had hoped he was after the way he behaved. 

Niall tried to find a part of him that felt sorry for his best friend, but to cheat on Macy when he had a clear head was just such a disgusted thing to do. Not that being drunk would have justified it, but it would have been a little easier for Niall to accept. 

"I don't know, but you need to." Liam's shoulders slump and Niall thinks that maybe Liam was hoping Niall would give him permission to keep it between them. 

Maybe, maybe if he didn't love Macy so much he would have. But god, Macy was like a fucking Queen and Liam just disrespected her in the worse way possible. He didn't deserve to get away with this. 

"What do I even say Ni? How can I even possible begin to start telling her?"

"The truth, tell her how you have been feeling. It's what you should have done from the start then maybe last night you would have kept your dick out of some girls mouth." Liam flinches looking down at the table. 

"I'm sorry you saw that." Niall studied Liam's face, leaning forward on his elbows, mug raised to his lip. 

"Yeah, I could have done without seeing your come face. What exactly are you sorry for though? Me being traumatised or the fact I caught you and now you have to tell?" Liam's head snapped back up again.

"The first one of course. Jesus Niall I would have told you anyway and you know it. I just - I really wish it didn't happen. I can't believe I have to go home and tell her, what if she leaves me? I don't think I know how to be without her" Niall can hear footsteps upstairs, probably Harry. They have never been good at staying asleep without each other. 

"You might have to learn. You don't tell her by the end of today then I will. I'm not gonna have her lied to. It will be better coming from you, she might actually be able to work through it. If it comes from me then she will think you had no plan to tell her. Just do the right thing yeah?" Liam nods rubbing his eyes will the heel of his hand. 

"You tell dad?"   
"Yeah. I'm sure he will be having a word with you later too. He is disappointed." Liam nods again his chin wobbling as he tried not to cry. Niall looks away, determined to not start feeling sorry for him.   
"I wonder what my mum would think if she was still here?" Liam hardly ever spoke about his mum, even when Niall had lost his own Liam didn't talk about her and if he did it would only be because Harry had mentioned something.   
"Mums can be surprisingly understanding. I'm sure she would have had some good advice." Niall sometimes feels bad that he took away the chance for Liam to have another adult in his life that could take on a parental role. 

If Harry had fallen in love with someone his own age, man or woman, they would have become a second parent to Liam. Could have helped in so many different ways than Niall could.

They where best friend's, Niall could never take on the role. It would be too wierd for them both. 

"Yeah maybe. It's done now though, I just have to face the music. I just really hope she can forgive me, I don't want to lose her. I was being an idiot, I don't care about other people. I only need her for the rest of my life." Niall sips at his tea to stop himself from replying. Liam should really have thought of that before letting someone suck his dick in a dirty bathroom of some club. 

"Morning " Harry comes shuffling in then all messed up hair and rosy cheeks and sleepy eyes that he keeps rubbing at. He comes over to the table bending down to kiss Niall who kisses back because he doesn't care about morning breath mixed with stale alcohol, and he runs his finger over the line left on Harry's face from where the pillow had pressed into him. Harry is so soft in the morning and Niall will never get bored of it. 

"It's early. Why we up?" Niall gets up from the table so he can make Harry's coffee for him. It's his fault he is awake too early after going to bed too late so it's the least he can do. 

"Liam's guilty conscience." Niall looks over his shoulder at Harry, can tell he is trying to work out through he sleepy daze what Niall is going on about. His face darkens suddenly and Niall looks away.

"I am so disappointed in you." Comes from Harry at the same time as.  
"I'm so sorry dad." Comes from Liam.

Niall adds a sugar to Harry's coffee, not how he normally takes it these days but he looks like he needs it. 

"Honestly Liam, at what point did I raise you to act disrespectful towards woman in any way?" Niall puts Harry's mug down in front of him, hand sliding down his back as he looks at Liam slumped over the table. 

"I think that Liam is feeling pretty awful about it today." Harry takes a sip of coffee, winces at the temperature then shakes his head pointing between the two of them.

"No, no best friend stuff here. I am far to tired to take on the both of you. What he done was wrong and disgusting. Macy is the best kind of girl you are going to ever get Liam. I don't even know how you can be so stupid." Niall sits down next to Harry, hand rubbing in a soothing circle on his back. 

"I'm not teaming up with him on this, I agree with you love. Liam is going to be telling her today and he is going to start making up for it and he is not going to do it again right?" Liam shakes his head.

"Never again. I promise it was just a stupid moment that I will always regret. If she stays with me I will spend the rest of my life making it up to her i swear. I hate myself for this, I really hate myself." His voice breaks at the end as he once again stops himself from crying.  
Harry and Niall both reach across the table to take one of Liam's hands each.   
"Hey don't say that. It was a rotten thing yeah and you really messed up, but you're going to do the right thing and tell her and it might work out." Liam smiles at Niall squeezing his hand tighter.   
"I hope so. I'm sorry for letting you down so much dad."   
"It's ok, your going to step up now and own up to your mistake and that will make me proud." Liam let's go off their hands, getting up from his seat.   
"I think I'm going to head home and work out what I'm going to say to her. I will let you know how it goes. Thanks for not like killing me or anything." Liam looks a nervouse wreak when he leaves. Niall can't imagine how horrible it must be to know your about to hurt someone you love. 

He messed up with Harry once and that was bad enough even though he barely remembered half the stuff they said or done. He can't imagine Harry would have given him another chance if he was sober and made the choice to cheat. 

"You think he will be ok if this all goes tits up and she leaves?" Harry asks fingers tapping against his mug and bottom lip pulled in between his teeth. 

"Yeah. He has you don't he. I just feel bad that he doesn't have a second parent to help too you know? I mean he has Louis but still, another parent would have been nice." Harry puts his mug down grabbing Niall's hands in-between his larger ones. 

"What are you on about. Niall you just got up at the arse crack of dawn after being up until god knows when in the morning just to talk to him. You're their for him just as much as a parent would be. He is not missing out on anything." 

"Yeah but it's different. I'm his friend and I have been since we where thirteen. I'm not like a mum or a dad am I? I've kinda stole that from him." Harry frowns shaking his head.  
"No, some idiot who hit his mum with a car stole that from him. You have given him a little bit of it back, trust me. Now let's stop this silly talk and go have a shower. We need to be prepared for Louis and Zayn's attitudes when they wake up."   
"You should go back to bed, get some more sleep." Harry stands up pulling Niall with him. 

"Nah." He tugs Niall into a hug, burying his face into his neck.  
"Wound much rather give you a sneaky blow job while everyone is asleep." 

Xxxxx

It always amazes Niall how fascinating and peaceful babies are. How they have no idea of the amazing impact they have on the life of people around them, how much love they create and how much happiness they can spread. Something as simple as pressing his nose into the soft brown hairs on Nolan head can make a feeling of complete contentment spread through Niall.  He has been in their lives for such a short time but Niall is already so fiercely protective of this tiny little boy, so in love and mesmerised. 

Niall and Harry had only been back together for four months the first time he told Harry he wanted a baby. He had spent the day with Elliott while Zayn and Matt took Rae our for some daddy daughter time and it was like this little hole Niall didn't know he had in his heart filled for a few hours. Later when he got to Harry's house he could now feel this hole, it was so obviously there that before Harry had even said hello to him Niall had blurted out that he wanted them to have a baby. 

They didn't live together yet, they where still finding their feet as a couple again but a week later they walked into a meeting with an adoption agency hand in hand and full of excitement. They did not tell everyone else what they where doing until they got approved three months later. Nobody really supported them at first, which Niall and Harry understood. Niall was still living in his flat and showing no sigh of wanting to move out of it yet. They had only been back together for a short time, not even married. Harry and Niall knew it was right though, that this was the next step. They wanted a baby, they wanted to give a child a home. They just wanted to love. 

It was nearly five months ago that they received the letter to say they had been approved, just shortly after Zayn and Matthew had been re-approved themselves. Zayn had told Niall the wait could be really long, more then a year or even a couple. Niall knew that getting the letter did not mean a baby would just fall into his arm straight after, another reason he was glad they decided to just go for it. Harry was thirty five now, he might not want a baby in a few years time.

Niall felt like they had been waiting a lifetime though. He loved Nolan, Elliott and Rae so much and he wanted to spend every second he could with them. He did not want to miss a single thing any of them done. He loved that they where all going to grow up with this amazing bond with him, that he was cool Uncle Niall who threw them around, whispered naughty words and snuck them sugary treats while also being the best at making the funny voices when reading their favorite books, the one they went to to put a plaster on whatever cut they managed to get or kiss a bruised leg better. He loved every moment, but he always came away with the acing empty hole. He wanted it filled so badly, and it would only be filled with someone that was his. He wanted to be a dad. 

The house was the most peaceful it had been for a long time. River has been called by a very distraught Macy about an hour ago so she left the house in a rush shouting something about milk in the fridge he could use and Harry had nipped out to the shops. Having two very hungover men in the house left the fridge looking a little bare. 

So Niall was on his own watching Nolan as he chomped on his hand and occasionally kicked his feet into Niall's stomach. 

Babies where also very distracting. Niall was supposed to have sent his final draft of his new book, Paper Houses to his publisher three days ago. He had promised himself that having River stay here with Nolan for a few weeks would not put him behind scheduled but he couldn't help but trail behind River most the day to make sure she was alright. Now his phone and email was full of rather demanding messages from both Sonya and Maggie telling Niall to get his arse in gear and send it over. The release date was set for a months time and he still had to have people edit it and then he might have it sent back with notes on suggested changes so he really did have to get his arse in gear. 

He had already been given a little longer to write as he had found the subject a little heard to get through. He had decided to step away from romance a little and focus a little on the harsher side of life. Writing about Cancer was a no brainer to Niall and it was a book he would have written at some point anyway. It was important for him to spread awareness and to talk about his experiance and hopefully let his fans know they where not alone if they where going through the same thing. 

He had created his little family of characters in one night and had  soared through the first half of the book, Harry hardly ever getting him away from his laptop. The last part he found harder and it brought up a lot of nasty memories and feelings for Niall that had him marching around the house in a bad mood snapping at Harry. 

It was finished now though and he was so proud of it. He just had to peel himself away from Nolan and Harry so he could read through it again and send it off. 

"Hey good looking." Harry walks into the house, closing the door gently behind him Tesco bag swinging in his hand. 

"Hi love." Harry leans over the back of he sofa for a kiss as he passes, wiggling his fingers in Nolan's face as a hello.

"River sleeping?" He asked as he goes into the kitchen.

"Nope, your son has officially broken Macy's heart and River was called away. Have you heard from him? I thought he would have called or come here?" He can hear Harry banging around the kitchen as he puts the shopping away.

"No. Do you think we should be worried?" Niall takes Nolan soggy hand in his pulling a silly face. 

"Nah, you know Liam he is probably out walking somewhere thinking he don't deserve to be around anyone." Niall gets up, holding Nolan carefully as he walks over to his little Moses basket to lay him down. Maybe he will doze off and Niall can go do some work. 

When he walks into the kitchen Harry is munching on a carrot a frown on his face. 

"You think Macy will stick around if they split up?" The thought of Macy leaving their group terrified Niall. 

"I hope not. Can't imagine her ever leaving the girls. Don't know how she will feel about us though, what with you being Liam's dad and me his closest mate."

"When we get married are you going to stop calling him your best mate and start calling him you step son?" Niall laughs resting his forehead on Harry's shoulder.

"No."

"You will actually be his step dad though. Didn't see that coming when he brought your scrawny butt home from school." Niall slaps at Harry chest, pouting.

"I was thirteen, i was supposed to be scrawny, and I didnt exactly look at you and go oh yummy gonna screw him when i'm older."

"Bet you did."

"I did not." Harry takes another bite of his carrot nudging Niall's head with his chin.

"You did, I was like a really hot dad. You well wanked over me." Niall rolls his eyes moving away from Harry.

"If that's what gets you through the day love. Who said I was going to marry you anyway?" 

"Nobody needs to say, i just know." Niall smiles walking back into the living room to check on Nolan finding him fast asleep. 

"You know what, I never got told how you and Liam first got talking to each other?" Harry is following behind him, grinning down at Nolan and wrapping his arms around Niall waist.

"Zayn pushed me to the ground and Liam picked me up. We bonded over our hate for him." 

"Hmm, such a Malik thing to do. I will push him to the ground when I see him next. Defend my baby." Harry leads them over to the sofa climbing onto Niall lap straight away.

"Aww, you are like eight years too late but thanks love." 

"You are very welcome. Are we going to kiss lots now that the baby is asleep?"

"I should probably work now the baby is asleep." Harry pouts, rocking his hips down slightly into Niall lap. 

"Want you though." Niall tuts, sliding his finger under Harry's shirt. 

"You always want me." It was true. Since him and Harry had been approved to adopt Harry had been all over Niall. Like the idea if them becoming dad's together got him all hot. Not that Niall would ever complain, he quite likes Harry going after him like an eager puppy most the time. 

"It's cause you're so sexy. I'm very lucky bagging myself a young spring chicken." Niall laughs shaking his head. 

"Please don't call me that." Harry flips them so Niall is on his back, grinning down at him. 

"You are a chicken. Did you know that when I was your age you where eight."

"Oh god Harry, what is wrong with you!" Niall laughs loudly, Harry fingers digging into his side's.

"Shush, you will wake the baby." Niall rolls his eyes slapping Harry's hands away. 

"Remember that time you put your school uniform back on?" Harry waggles his eyebrows.

"Yeah, not happening again. It didn't even fit Haz, so sorry but your pervy fantasy is over." Harry pouts.

"That's a shame. I miss school boy Niall, maybe I should change you up for another one." 

"Nah, they won't be as good as me." Harry hums rocking his hips again, sending a shiver up Niall's back. 

"True, never find someone as good as you. At least we still have the tie." Niall leans up to kiss Harry, his own hips starting to move with Harry's. 

"We have many ties now." He licks across Harry bottom lip, pushing his tounge into his mouth to taste him better.   
Chewing gum with the faint taste of coffee. 

"I like tying you up, so hot." Nialls head falls back, a string of saliva snapping between them, Harry leaning down to lick it up. Niall grips onto his waist, a small moan rumbling in his throat when Harry circles his hips. 

"I like you, love you. Love you so much." He lifts his leg up, slinging it over the top of the sofa, dragging Harry's shirt up a little so he can spread his hands out over his back, feel the muscles tensing. 

"I still think, ah, still think about our first kiss ya know. Nothing has been as good and as right as you. You remember baby, remember how good it felt?" Niall nods fingers digging into the small pudge of Harry's hips. He was actually going to get off on this. On the sofa with Harry lazily grinding against him, still fully dressed. He was going to come like some fifteen year old boy. 

Harry's hand goes underneath them, fingers spreading across his stomach, t-shirt rumpling up. This was something else Harry had starting doing. Touching Niall's stomach in a way he imagined him to do if he had a baby in there. If it was possible for Niall to have their baby inside him.

He warmed his heart but it also twisted at his gut. That he could never do that for Harry, that he could have been with someone who could do that for him. 

He was secure in his relationship with Harry. He knew he was loved, he trusted Harry and he knew Harry found him sexy.  But sometimes he wondered if Harry whishes he fell for someone who could give him it all. 

He is snapped out of his thoughts by Harry chanting his name, his body juddering before he starts to come, fingers gripping at his top. It pushes Niall over and he starts to come too, moaning into the side of Harry's neck, lifting his hips up to get a little more pressure as he soaks his pants. 

"Love you." Niall smiled turning Harry's head for a kiss.  
"Love you too." They stay cuddling on the sofa for a bit and Harry is about to suggest they go clean up when the front door opens and River walks on. 

Harry and Niall freeze, both grinning down at each other. River kicks her shoes off before looking over at the two of them. 

She raises her eyebrows going over to get Nolan out of his Moses basket. 

"Harry your son is a dick." 

"I know. Complete agreement." River huffs looking them both over once more. 

"What are you guys kids again?" 

"What?" Niall puts on his best innocent face but it's ruined by Harry snorting loudly. 

"What do you mean what? You think I don't know you both just got finished dry humping each other while my innocent baby sleeps in the same room. Dirty boys." Niall laughs wrapping himself around Harry more, trying not to react to the horrid wetness in his pants. 

"Come on Nolan baby, let's leave the children to get cleaned up. We are going over to the Malik's for dinner don't forget." 

"Ok thanks." Niall watches River go up the stairs with Nolan before turning back to Harry. 

"Can we go shower now, this is actually really gross. My boxers are going to be ruined now." Harry get up off Niall's, face screwing up as he moves. 

"You can buy some more Mr famous Author."

"Ah I see," Harry yanks Niall's up by his hands. "That's why you are always all over me. It's for me fame and money." 

"Oh definitely, gets me right hard when I think of that bank account of yours, no shame." Niall keeps hold of Harry's hand as they go upstairs and into the bathroom. 

"Your an idiot. Love you though." Harry beams leaning into the shower to turn it on.

"Love you too."

xxxxxx

True to his word when they see Zayn later Harry shoves him to the ground.

"That's for pushing my baby boy over." Zayn frowns looking up at Niall.

"When did I push you over?" Niall grins bending down to pat Zayn on the head.

"Eight years ago. But it's alright, I forgive you because you got so pretty" Zayn watches Niall walk off a confused look on his face. 

"I was always pretty."


	4. Chapter 4

"Tell me about your wedding." Niall is spread out on the bed of his and Harry's hotel room, Harry laying half across him as he texts Louis from his phone. 

"What do you want to know?" Niall looks at their suits hanging on the back of the door, can't really believe that it's already Louis and Cassie's wedding day. They have to be downstairs soon to start greeting guest and whatever else it is groomsmen do.  
They where supposed to already be dressed and ready but Harry had come out the shower looking all wet and inviting so one thing lead to another. As it does quite often with them. 

"I don't know. Just what was it like?" Harry places his phone back down, moving so his whole body is on top of Niall, hands cradling his face. 

"It was small. Only had Lou, mum and Liam there. It was just at a registry office in town and we went out to a restaurant afterwards. Then we went home." Niall ran his hands up Harry's chest, finger tip moving around the outline of his tattoos. 

"You didn't want a big wedding?" Harry shrugs thumb brushing over Niall's lip.  
"I was only a kid, I couldn't afford to give her the whole white wedding experience. We didn't need it either, we just wanted to be husband and wife. We didn't even really have many people to invite. Her family obviously wouldn't have come, I only had my mum. It was still the perfect day." Niall was glad they could do this. That he could find out stuff about Harry and Rebecca without getting jealous. Even though he was well aware that if she was still alive Niall would very much still be Liam's friend to Harry and nothing more.  
He loved hearing about the love and the life they had together. Loved that Liam's family was such a happy one. 

"What did you wear?" 

"I wore the suit I got for prom, so did Louis. And I brought Rebecca this dress I had seen her looking at a few weeks before. It was on sale." Niall thinks of a younger Harry going off to buy that dress. So young but already so thoughtful and perfect and ready to become a husband and a dad. 

"You're so cute. Bet it was an amazing day." Harry nods, eyes turning sad for a moment before brightening up again. 

"I was going to ask her to renew our vows, started planning it a couple of days before she died. Was going to steal her wedding ring and have it engraved and all this romantic shit. It was going to be the proper thing this time. Church, wedding dress, bridesmaids, more then three guests. I think she would have been really excited, she would have said the big stuff didn't matter but she would have been excited for sure." Niall pushes Harry's hair away from his face, his curls nearly reaching his chin nowadays.  
"Well I imagine anyone would be excited to do that with you." Harry leans down to close the small gap between them kissing him softly and slowly until Niall's toes curl and his stomach twist in the way he loves. 

"I love you." Harry kisses down to Niall's neck, talking into the sensitive skin making Niall shiver and tense up.  
"So beautiful and kind and amazing. So lucky." Niall's hands move down to Harry's arse, squeezing his cheeks before parting then enough to push a finger between.

"Love you too." Harry gasps nipping at Niall's shoulder with his teeth.  
"We really have to get dressed before we end up fucking again." Harry groaned, head dropping onto Niall's chest.

"Maybe Louis won't notice if we are not there. Let's just stay up here all day instead. We won't have to get dressed and I can be inside you all day. You could even fuck me a couple of times." Niall laughs pushing Harry's head off him so he can sit up. 

"That sound perfect but no. Your the best man you absence would be noticed love." Harry signed dramatically rolling across the bed until he falls off to the floor with a thud.

"Ok, if I really have to I can drag myself away from your butt to see my best friend get married. If i really, really have to." Harry's head pops up from the bed a small pout on his face. 

"Come on loser. We have to shower again anyway so I can quickly give you a blowie if you want?" Harry gets back on the bed again, crawling across to get to Niall. 

"Want your fingers." Niall watches the muscles of Harry's back tense and untense as he moves, the swell of his bum looking rather good to Niall. 

"Fine, fingers but it's gotta be quick and we have to get dressed as soon as we are out." Harry smiles, all teeth and dimples and his ridiculous boyish charm.  
"Deal, come on sweet cheeks." Harry leaps off the bed and runs into the bathroom slapping Niall's arse on the way past.  
"Hurry up Niall! We have a wedding to attend!" 

Xxxx

Niall leaves the ceremony room through the big double glass doors that lead to the garden outside. Louis and Cassie would be outside soon to start having photos taken before everyone sat down to eat. Niall just needed to take a few seconds to himself before the next round of madness. 

Him and Harry had left their room earlier to a flurry of activity. Rae was screaming and crying because the flowers in her hair where fake and not real like she had thought, and Zayn was glaring at Matt like he was going to tear him a new one for informing her of this. Louis sister Daisy had torn her bridesmaid dress. Niall had to rearrange Cassie bouquet so Rae could finally have some real flowers. Macy was still ignoring Liam while also bursting into tears at any random moment. 

Everything came together in the end though and Louis and Cassie where now successfully married and Niall could just breath for a second. 

At least he could have alcohol soon. And he was going to be sat with his friends having a laugh. He also gets to watch Harry do a speech which would be fun. 

Niall was outside for only a few minutes when he felt like someone was watching him. He done a slow spin, eyes searching the area before looking back into the ceremony room to see if Harry was maybe standing there watching him. 

He couldn't see anything or anyone. He patted his pockets for the fag and lighter he stole off Zayn earlier that day. His eyes where still flicking about as he lit and smoked. He tries to reason with himself. There where a lot of people here today for the wedding and also normal guest in the hotel. Someone somewhere could probably see him and was watching what he was doing. People like to people watch. The hairs on the back of his neck stayed on end, no matter how much he tried to convince himself there was nothing to be freaked out about. And he kept getting this weird shiver go down his spin. He just felt off. 

A hand touching his shoulder sent him jumping about a foot in the air. He turned round, chucking his fag to the side when he came face to face with Liam.

"Whats got you to jumpy?" Niall sighed, relaxing a little.

"Nothing really. Just felt like i was being watched, was really creepy." The glass doors swung open and the photographer came jogging out followed by the wedding party. Niall could just see Harry and Louis at the back of the group, Cassie tucked tightly against Louis side both looking really happy.

"Your just being paranoid mate, probably just some hotel guest checking you out. Could have probably pulled." Liam winked earning a slap across the shoulder from Niall.

"I'm here with your dad, I have already pulled twice today." Liam screwed his face up in disgust. 

"I really do not need to know that honestly. My dad does not have sex." They both start walking towards the group, doomed to spend the next however long posing for too many photos. 

"Yeah he does. We have sex like everyday. More then once sometimes. Your dads willy goes into my bum." Liam shoves Niall hard sending him stumbling to the side, laughing loudly.

"Niall Horan! If you mess your suit up before these pictures I swear to god I will kill you." Niall ignored Cassie, quickly moving to shove Liam back.

"His willy also goes in my mouth too. Yum." Liam grabs Niall in a headlock, tugging at his hair.

"Stop saying willy you idiot." Niall yells, waving his hand around in an attempt to hit at Liam but was managing to miss each time. 

"Willy, Willy, Willy!" Niall hits him in the stomach making Liam loosen his grip enough to wiggle out. 

"Boobs and fanny!"

"That's just gross Liam."

"Yeah well you're gross."

"Your dad dose not think I'm gross."

"But you are. You are gross and you smell and you hair is stupid."

"That really is no way to talk to your future step dad. You're grounded."

"Don't even tr.. ouch fuck Cass." Cassie grabs both boys by the ear, holding them out at arm length so they don't stand on her dress as she drags them towards the photographer. 

"As much as we love watching you act like five year olds we have a schedule and I will not let you plonkers send it all haywire so go stand with Harry and smile." They both do as they are told, straightening out their suits as they stand either side of Harry, who is smiling like an idiot while trying to to laugh. 

When the camera clicks for the first time it captures the exact moment Niall slams his hand into Liam stomach again, Liam's mouth a perfect round circle. The second click is Nialls face twisted up as Liam pinches at his nipple, Harry's  hand raised ready to slap Liam's hand away. The third click Louis is looking behind him. Then Rae and Elliott escape and Zayn has to go chance them. Then Rae thinks its a perfectly good idea to pull her dress over her head because she is wearing princess pants. Then Louis sisters are raising there middle fingers in the air towards Louis who is crossed eyes with his tongue sticking out. Then Macy is yanking her bra up and River is pulling her underwear out of her butt. All in all its a rather successful attempt at a nice group photo and Niall had no doubt every single one will be loved. 

"I hate you all by the way." Is Cassie's parting words as everyone moves away so her and Louis can have some couple pictures before shooting with the bridesmaids. 

xxxxxxx

Niall rubbed his hands together as waiters rounded the table placing down bowls of chicken soup, vegetable for Zayn, with some warm bread rolls.  
"I'm fucking starving." Matt tuts starting to cut Elliott's roll up for him, while Zayn pushes his bowl of out the reach of his small hands.  
"When are you not hungry?"  
"After I have just eaten." Niall grabs his spoon, tucking in. Directly across from him Rae takes a massive bit of her own bread before sticking out a food covered tongue. Niall gives her a thumbs  up. 

"Have you heard dad's speech?" Liam asks from his left. He is playing around with his food, cheek resting on his hand as he mopes. Macy still hadn't spoken to him today and he was acting like a baby about it.  
"No. To be honest I'm not sure he even had one written until last night. I did offer to write it for him but he said I wouldn't get the jokes right."

"I'm guessing by that he means they would actually be funny." 

"Hey, his jokes are hilarious. Like the most adorable jokes in the world. So cute." Zayn makes gagging noises, which Elliott copies sending a mouthful of soup over the table clothes earning Zayn a glare from Matt. 

"How's things with you and Macy Li?" Niall looks over to where the bridesmaids are all sitting, a few table away from them. Niall was sure when he saw the seating chart last week the girls where sat right next to them. He can only presume Cassie was trying to keep the peace for today. 

"I have no idea. She is staying with her parents which is a nightmare because it means they know what I have done. And they really like me so that's probably been messed up. She keeps coming over though. Said she wants to spend time together and see if she can get over it. She just keeps blowing hot and cold. One second we could be snuggled up on the sofa and it's like everything is good again and then suddenly she will be telling me what a disgusting jerk I am and storming out." Niall sighs giving a useless shrug. He did feel sorry for Liam but what he done did kind of make him a disgusting jerk. He made a choice, when sober and it a good frame of mine to cheat on his girlfriend. Niall wanted to be a supportive friend but he also felt like Liam deserved what he was getting, and he can't really blame Macy for struggling. He can't imagine what it would be like to have a moment of normalcy with Harry to then just suddenly remember he had been unfaithful. 

"That really sucks bro, your just gonna have to give her time. It must be really shitty for her. You are bloody lucky she is trying." Liam nods swirling his spoon around in his bowl. 

"Yeah I know. Just God, I can't believe I messed up like that. Everything was so perfect and I just let it all get ruined. Just over something so stupid." 

"Well i think you and Macy are made for each other, have been since you where thirteen getting awkward boners whenever she walked past." 

"I wish I knew awkward boner Liam." Matt spoke up, wiping Elliott's chin where he had dribbled his soup. 

"He was a loser." Liam glared across at Zayn. 

"Excuse you."

"What's a boner?" Matt groaned, head falling into his hands. 

"Just something we used to call uncle Liam babes." 

"Zayn!" Matt's head shots back up again and he turns to face his daughter.  
"Rae love, that is a naughty word so nobody will be saying it again OK." Rae looked thoughtful for a moment before nodding going back to munching on her food. 

There is a load of laughter from the girls table suddenly and Liam's head snaps towards them, lips quirking up into a smile when he sees Macy, hand pressed to her mouth laughing. They make eye contact for a second, Macy smiling back before looking away. 

Niall raises his eyebrow at Liam, reaching for his glass of wine. 

"Uncle Niall, can I have sip of your drink?"

"Yeah."

"No!" 

"Meanie." Niall and Rae both mumble together. 

Xx

When Harry stands to do his speech Niall has a now wide awake Elliott on his lap eating the crumbs off Niall's dessert. 

Cassie's dad has just finished his speech which had been long and quite frankly boring but it had Cassie blushing and crying so Niall managed to enjoy it. 

"Hey everyone, thanks again for coming I know Louis and Cassie really appreciate you all getting together for today." Niall beams when Harry looks his way sending him a wink.

"It's been quite the emotional day, even the cake is in tiers." Niall laughs loudly, while the rest of the table around him just groaned. Zayn tuns to Niall, unimpressed and lips puckered out.

"You have sex with that." Niall snorts, hiding the sound in Elliott's soft dark hair. 

"I'm not actually that good at making speeches, and stupidly I said no to the writer helping me out." A few people lean back in their chairs to look at Niall. 

"But here we go anyway. Louis has been my best friend since Primary school, more like a brother really. There has been no end of good times that would not have been the same without him by my side, and a few really bad times that I definitely would not have survived through without him. Louis is know as the joker of the group and always has been. The one to come up with the best prank, to have the best comeback, the one to drink the fastest and for the longest and the one to do things most people would not dare too. Mostly because they have more then two brains cells." A few people laugh and Louis just pulls a face like he agree.

"What most people don't see with Louis is this side to him that can pull a person through anything and just make life feel OK again. When I was seventeen I had quite a few people turn their backs on me for two reasons, one being my sexuality and the other my choice to get married and become the father of a three year old. Louis never for a second considered being one of those people. He was there with me at five Am in the morning, three hours before he was due to be at his first collage class of the morning, to help me move my stuff out of my parents house. He was there with me when I trailed around the shops to find the cheapest wedding rings know to man, and he was there when I got married walking by my wife's side she she didn't have to be alone." Louis smiled, looking down at the table. Niall feels a lump start to form in his throat and we he looks at Liam he is already crying. 

"When my wife, Liam's mum, died Louis was the first person I spoke to and saw. He was the thing that kept me and Liam together. He moved his life to be closer to us, without any hesitation or any complaint he just packed everything up changed his job and he took care of us. He has been like a second dad to my son, he has been everything we needed and more." Harry places his hand on Louis shoulder, Louis turning his head so he can place a kiss on it.

"So yeah, Louis is the joker, the crazy one. A complete and utter idiot who i'm sure is sometimes more of a five year old then someone in his late thirties, but he is also the best kind of person anyone is ever going to meet. Loyal, loving, dependable, unbelievably kind, wise. Like so wise guys you should all seriously go to this one for advice because he nails it every time." Louis chuckles looking up at Harry who looks right back at him both grinning like idiots. Niall hopes him and Liam will be this cute when one of them gets married. 

"And Cassie. Oh my god if there was ever a woman so perfect for my brother. I don't know how he managed to get you and it certainly took him long enough to grown the balls to do it but i am so thankful that he did. I love you sweetie and he is going to give you the best married life you could wish for. I would threaten to smash his face in if he doesn't but i'm pretty sure you will manage that yourself." The girls in the room cheer loudly making Cassie laugh and pull Louis in for a kiss, whispering something that has his eye crinkling and his teeth showing. 

"So could everyone please raise a glass for the two most amazing people this world has ever had. To Mr and Mrs Tomlinson." Everyone raises their glass, Matt even letting Rae hold his up as they all echo Harry. 

Harry looks glad to be finished when he sits back down, eyes meeting Niall.

'I love you' Niall mouth, still clapping along with everyone else.

'love you too'

xxxxxxx

The party is in full swing when Niall stumbles outside to get some air. The car park is full, endless amounts of people having turned up for the evening due.   

Niall is too hot, a little tipsy and is trying to decide if it was acceptable to have a second fag as he stands outside in the car park. He still has Zayn's stuff in his pockets but he does not normally like to smoke more then one as he knows it upsets Harry when he does.

There are a few people milling around, a couple on their phone and the rest just chatting as they all grab some fresh air like Niall. 

He suddenly spots Cassie out the corner of his eye, a little further up the car park almost completely hidden by a bush. He makes his way towards her, shoes crunching on the loose stones catching her attention. She smiles, cigarette held up between her fingers.

"Ah well, if the beautiful bride is doing it then i had better join right?" Cassie gives him a knowing smile as he digs into his pockets. 

"What you doing hiding out here? Fed up with the husband already?" 

"Nah, that's kind of impossible I think. Just needed a break from all the hugging and kissing." Niall pops the fag between his lips, hands raising up to light it. 

"Fair enough love. Your having fun though?" She nods, looking up at he clear black sky.

"God yeah. Can't believe today is actually happening. Mrs Cassie Tomlinson how crazy is that." Niall hums in agreement. 

"I love him so much Ni. Like sometimes i just want to squash him until his head pops because he is so cute. You ever get that with Harry?" Niall laughs loudly, foot kicking at a big stone by his shoe.

"Actually yes. Kind of overwhelming sometimes, how strongly we are capable of loving another person. Best feeling ever though, don't think I really know how to live without that feeling anymore. Like he says shit like 'even the cake has tiers' and i want to just kiss him." 

"I liked that joke." Niall smiles.

"Me too." They smoke in silence after that, both lost in thoughts of love and all things mushy until Cassie throws her cigarette to the floor, lifting her dress to stomp on it. Niall takes note of the black biker boots she is wearing under her dress with a fond smile. 

"Right I better head back in, Louis wont be greeting all the new guest like he should." She kisses Niall on the cheek, ruffling his hair before walking off. Niall watches her as she goes, stopping by a group of people, letting herself be pulled in for more hugs before she manages to escape and get back inside. 

His phone beeps in his pocket.

Harry: You vanished.

Niall: Outside, be in soon.

Harry: You doing the smelly thing?

Niall laughs, shaking his head.

Niall: Yeh. 

He slips his phone back into his trouser pocket, knowing Harry wont reply after that. The bush in front of him rustles a little, with some bird or something he guesses. He finishes off, throwing his fag down with Cassie's ignoring Harry's voice in his head telling him off for using the floor and not the bin. 

The bush rustles again as he goes to walk off and a shiver goes up his spine, the feeling he got earlier of being watched hitting him again. He turns back around staring into the the bush, eyes narrowed as he tried to see any movement. He must be going crazy. He was actually looking into the bush like he thought some person was going to leap out any second. Again he reasons with himself that there is a lot of people here for the wedding and the hotel. No doubt someone was watching him wondering what his weird ass was doing glaring at the greenery. 

"What you doing?" Niall yelps spinning round.

"The fuck Z, don't sneak up on me."

"I didn't really sneak I just walked up, so stop being weird. You have my fags and i'm gagging so hand over." Niall yanks them out of his pocket tossing them over to Zayn.

Niall hand presses to his chest where his heart was pounding at double the speed. He had no idea why he was letting himself get so freaked out today. He had not slept well last night so maybe he was just getting overtired or something. 

"What are we going to do about Liam?" 

"What do you mean?" 

"Well with him and Macy? We got to do something to get them back to normal right? If they end up splitting up for good don't you think it will cause some kind of divide? Boys against girls or some shit like that." Niall frowns at the thought. He could not really see a way for them to help. He did not want to go to Macy and push her to forgive Liam if she was not ready or willing to and he did not want to seem like he was fine with what Liam done when he really, really was not. He hoped that if they do split up that Macy will still be close to him and the other boys, she must know they are on her side with this. Not that there where sides really, but lets be honest if there was Niall would be team Macy. Liam was his closest friend but he had cheated on Macy and Niall could not support that at all. 

"We will just have to wait it out I think. We know Liam has learnt his lesson he just needs to find the right way to show Macy that, he needs to work for her forgiveness so we will just leave them to it I think. I'm sure things will go back to normal soon, and if they don't then I'm sure it wont change the dynamics of the group too much. Macy knows how much we all love her and she loves us right back. It will get sorted." Zayn looks at him for a moment before nodding and turning away. 

"We need to all go out soon. You and Harry and me and Matt. A big gay night out." Niall laughs leaning against Zayn's side. 

"I do love me a big gay night out." 

"Well that's settled then. We will go this weekend if our boys are not to messed up from tonight. The kids are with Matt's parents so we can both drink for once. Be a shame to waste an opportunity like that." Niall nuzzles his nose into Zayn's arm wondering how the hell he still manages to smell like art when he is in a brand new suit. Niall did not even know art was a smell before he started smelling Zayn.

"Alright, I am going to head on in and see how Harry is doing. Louis was making him do shots when I came out so it could be pretty messy." Zayn pats him on the shoulder.

"See ya in a bit." Niall waves starting to make his way back across the car park, trying to ignore the hairs on the back of his neck standing on edge as he goes. 

xxxxxx

Harry giggles when Niall grabs the back of his legs and yanks him down the bed towards him. 

"So handy Lou getting married in a hotel." Harry comments as he watches Niall lube up his fingers, the skin on his chest looking almost transparent in the dull light from the lamp by the side of the bed. 

"hmm, it is nice having a room to escape to. Open up." Harry bites down on his lip as he parts his legs, feet pressed into the mattress his lower back raising slightly as Niall pushes two fingers into him. 

"Ah, feels good. I'm pretty sure we would have managed even without the room." Niall smirks, pulling out so he can add a third finger, feeling more resistance this time.

"Yes but without the room we probably would not be on round three. Even you would not push your luck that much. God yeah." Harry's head falls back, curls already falling out of his perfectly styled quiff. He figured they are at the part of the night where Cassie will no longer care about how they all look anyway. Last time Niall looked at the time it was nearing 1am. Harry looks so good like this Niall thinks he would have found a way to get to round three even without a room to come to. 

"You want me to use a condom?" Harry nods, hissing when Niall removes his fingers wiping them on the bed.

"Yeah please. Don't want an awkward mess in front of Cassie's family do I." Niall goes over to his overnight bag unzipping it to look for his box of condoms. He frowns yanking the bag all the way open dread washing over him.

"Where is my notebook?" Harry sits up on his elbows to look over at Niall.

"What?"

"My notebook, it was right on the top and now its gone." Niall starts moving clothes out of the way trying to spot the grey book he had been using. 

"I don't know, maybe you just forgot it."

"I did not forget it Harry. I remember putting it in here. You know I don't go anywhere without it, especially overnight. I defiantly saw it when I got my shampoo out last night it was right at the top." He heard the thud of Harry falling back onto the bed.

"Can we look after. Kinda want to be fucked over here." Niall turns the bag upside down, tipping out the last few things inside including the condoms. 

"Harry its actually gone. All my notes are in there." Niall starts to panic, throwing clothes around in case he missed it before. 

"Someone has been in here. Someone one must have been in here and took it."

"Babe, who would take your notebook? Who would even know you brought it with you? Pretty sure only I know how attached you are to it." Niall's hands start to sake as he searches around on the floor trying not to be annoyed by Harry spread out on the bed like nothing is wrong. 

"I think someone has been watching me right, and now this. I honestly think someone has taken it." Harry sits up again, this time actually looked concerned.

"You didn't tell me that. When was someone watching you? Like a fan or something."

"I don't know Harry. Maybe. I mean that's what they would do right? Take something related to my books. Oh good Harry there was some really important stuff in there and I have information about Sonya and Maggie in there too, they are going to kill me."  
"Niall."

"And I have future ideas you know, stuff that people could steal."

"Niall love."

"Do you think we should call the police, I know its only a notebook but if they are watching me and breaking into hotel rooms when should call the police right?"

"Niall, its by the mirror." Niall stands up spinning round to face the dressing table with the mirror sat on top. His notebook was sitting right there.

"I did not put it there." Harry sighs, swinging his feet off the bed. His erection was gone and he looks really annoyed.

"Well obviously you did. So what are the chances of us actually fucking right now?"

"No Harry I swear I did not take it out of the bag. I have not needed to take it out of the bag because  have not written anything in it today or needed to even look at it." 

"Maybe you moved it to the side when you where getting other things out of the bag." Niall just stares at Harry trying really hard to not get pissed that he is not realising what is going on. Niall knows he did not move his notebook and he would remember if he had. 

"Or maybe someone broke in to our room and moved it, took it out of the bag to read and just didn't put it back." Harry makes a frustrated noise rubbing at his face. Niall can tell he is trying to keep his temper in check.

"Niall, who would go through the effort of breaking into the room to then not put it back where they found it or just take it with them?" Niall snatches the book of the side flicking through the pages to make sure everything was as it should be. 

"I don't know, but i'm telling you someone has." Harry shoulders slump and he starts looking for his clothes.

"Alright whatever, guess we should just go back downstairs now." Niall laughs, bitter and angry as he starts shoving things back into his bag.

"Well sorry you didn't get fucked, guess i am to busy acting crazy to see to you right now." Harry shoves his legs into his trouser harder then needed.

"I never said you where acting crazy. But you kind of are actually."

 "Oh fuck you." Niall stomps past where his suit is crumbled up on the floor grabbing a pair of jogging bottoms instead.

"Yeah, that is kinda what I was hoping you would do."

"Are you really going to act like a bitch just because you didn't get laid?" Niall slips on a white top, hand resting on his hips as he watches Harry getting dressed. 

"I don't know. Maybe. I'm a little drunk and really fucking horny and nobody broke into our bloody room." Niall scoffed kicking his clothes to the side.

"Whatever. You're acting like an arsehole." 

"You not coming back to the party?" Harry asks, looking Niall up and down in his clothes.

"No i'm not." Niall yanks the duvet down climbing into the bed.

"Fine whatever. You're being a child nobody is that interested in your notebook." Niall pulls the duvet back up over his head.

"Just bloody go away." He hears Harry sigh and for a second he thinks he is going to climb into bed with him, say sorry and that they will sort out what happened with the notebook because of course Niall would remember if he moved it or not. 

But Harry does not get into bed with him and instead Niall hears the click of the door opening and closing as Harry leaves. Niall curls up tighter and tries to ignore the sadness in his chest and the worry curling up his stomach. 

He just knows something is not right. 

He did not move his notebook.

Someone must have been in their room. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am not to keen on this one, I forced it out a little and that is never a good thing right? Bit of a filler really. Hope you all enjoy it anyway. Love you all. x

Harry and Niall don't talk as they pack up their bags the next morning which Niall is completely fine with as he is still pissed off.

Harry had come back at four am stumbling about the room and making about as much noise as an elephant before finally falling into bed. Niall had kept his back to him the whole time and pretended to be asleep. 

"You got the present?" Niall jumps, Harry voice sounding out of place in the silent room.   
"Yep." Niall pulls the envelope out from the side of his bag tossing it toward Harry. 

They had booked Louis and Cassie a week away at Disney world Florida. Neither of them could afford to book a honeymoon after paying for the wedding and Niall knew it was Cassie's dream holiday and she certainly deserved to have herself the honeymoon of her dreams. 

Niall was double checking he had everything, Harry now standing by the door twirling his car keys in his hand and he waited, an inpatient tilt to his mouth. 

Niall bit back his comment, knowing they where both still a little heated from the fight last night and Harry more so with the added hangover. Starting a argument now wound just make both of them blow up too much.   
They hardly argue but the few times they have it had turned pretty nasty really fast. 

"Right I'm ready. Cassie and Lou should be downstairs waiting for us."

"The whole world is waiting with how long you take." Niall pauses to take a deep calming breath, rolls his eyes then walks past Harry ripping the door open not bothering to hold it for Harry as he follows. 

It's tense in the elevator and Niall has a weird moment where he can't work out if he wants to punch Harry in the face or pin him to the wall to kiss the stupid look off his face. 

Someone gets on two floors before they have to to get off and both step to the side happy to let another body come between them for a moment. 

When they walk out into the lobby Cassie and Louis are wrapped around each other, both smiling so much Niall can see their teeth between the kisses. 

"Gross guys. Wedding night is over let's part please" Louis laughs at Niall stepping away from his wife but keeping a tight hold of her hand. 

"What did you wants us for? I want to get my wife home, gotta carry her over the threshold and shit." Harry holds up the envelope shoving it towards the pair. 

"What's this then?" Louis grabs it looking at it cautiously   
"If this is a bill for porn then I hate to tell ya but I'm not paying it. Hotel room yes, whatever freaky porn you are into no." 

"It's not porn you arse. Just open it. It's a wedding gift." Cassie tuts taking the envelope from Louis to start opening it. 

"Thought we said no gifts. Trust you two to not listen." Harry and Niall just smile watching as Cassie pulls the tickets out, Louis looking over her shoulder as he reads.

"Holy fuck." He snatches the tickets out of Cassie's hand holding them closer to his face.   
"What the fuck guys. Like what the fuck." 

Cassie let's out a sudden scream leaping at Niall and Harry who both manage to catch her. 

"Thank you! It's too much but thank you. It's everything I have wanted. Thank you. I love you both so much." Louis joins in on the hug, looking dazed as he presses his lips to Harry's cheek. 

"Thanks lads. You just made my wife even happier then I did last night."

"Well that's gross. Your welcome I think?"

Xxxxx

The drive back from the hotel is two hours. So far they are an hour in and Harry has yet to say a word. Niall is looking out the window tugging at a loose strand on his jeans.   
It's boring and it's awkward and they are two things he does not like to associate with Harry. 

"Nice feeling wasn't it? Giving them the holiday." Harry nods, bottom lips sucked into his mouth. Niall slumps back in his seat. 

He didn't actually get why Harry was still being a dick. Niall was pretty sure he was the one that should be pissed. Harry acted like an idiot last night and all Niall had done was express his worry over someone being in the room.   
Harry knows what Niall is like with his notebook and his work. He knows Niall would remember exactly where he put it and when he touched it last.   
He can't seriously be this angry that Niall didn't get around to having sex with him. It's not like he is deprived of sex. 

"Think Zayn wants us to go out tonight." 

"Well I'm sure you will both have fun." 

"I meant all of us. As in you too."

"Yeah, well I drank last night not sure I can do another night of it."

"Then don't drink, just come along and have fun. They have a weekend off and they don't want to waste it. In sure we won't be out too late."

"I'm not stopping them from going am I? So it's not a waste."

"What the fuck is your problem?" Harry didn't reply and instead just focused on driving face blank. 

"Ok whatever." Niall turned in his seat until he couldn't see Harry anymore accepting that the rest of the drive would be spent in silence. 

Niall had never been more relived to see their house and was unbuckling his seat belt and climbing out the car before Harry had even properly stopped. He left his bag behind for Harry to grab because if he was going to be an arse he could slave after Niall. 

Niall yanked his wallet out of his pocket to grab his house key so he didn't have to wait for Harry, who no doubt was going to take his sweet time just to piss Niall of more. 

He got the same feeling from last night when he opens his wallet and finds his house key missing. 

"Harry." He opens the zips and checks all the separate compartments as Harry makes his way up the path.

"Harry"

"What?" Harry grunts, dropping Niall's bag down at his feet. 

"My house key is not in here." Harry sighs grabbing his car keys out of his pocket again to get his own keys. 

"Must have left it in the house then." Harry leans around Niall to put the key into the lock.

"No, I had it in the hotel because I checked before I put my wallet away last night." The door opens and Harry walks in leaving Niall and his bag outside. 

"Well then it must have fell out at the hotel. I will call them up for you, see if they found it in our room." It just didn't feel right. Niall walks into the house looking down at his wallet in his hands, bag forgotten outside. Harry huffs then goes back out to get it. 

"No. No I don't think it can fall out. And I didn't open my wallet the whole time I was there. I walked into the room, took it out of my pocket, double checked for my key then put it down on the side. I didn't touch it again until we where packing up to leave and I put it into my pocket." Niall could see perfectly in his head all of his movements in the room relating to his wallet. 

He spun round on the spot, like the answer would just come out and show itself. 

Harry had left and was rattling around in the kitchen, the kettle starting to boil. 

Niall walked towards the kitchen doorway, hand starting to shake the grip he had on his wallet turning his knuckles white.

"I think...I think whoever broke into our room has my key." Harry slammed a mug down, leaning into the counter. 

"Nobody broke into our room."

"Well did you move my notebook? And did you take my key?"

"No Niall because why would I? You moved it and forgot and the key fell out. I said I will call the hotel and get them to look. That's all I can do." Niall threw his wallet onto the table crossing his arms as he perched next to it. 

"What you could do is believe me. This is starting to freak me out and I could do with you being on my side and not acting like I'm annoying you." Harry sighed pushing away from the counter to come stand in front of Niall. 

"You are not annoying me." He grips on to Niall's arms, bending to place their foreheads together. "I'm sorry I made you feel that way. I'm just hungover and grouchy, and last night I was drunk. I honestly just don't think someone was in our room. Just try not to stress about it love. We are home now and nothing else is going to happen."  

"Someone was watching me. I felt it before we done photos. And then later when I was outside I heard something in the bush. And it sounded like it could have been a person."

"There where a lot of people there Ni."

"I know, and I kept telling myself that and when I mentioned it to Liam he said the same. Can you please just believe me on this Haz. I really, really think someone is watching me. I'm scared." Harry's face softened, hands coming up to cup at Niall's face. Niall hopes, he really hopes Harry will be on his side with this. Niall would never say it if he didn't think it was true. Harry should know this. 

"Like a stalker? Or just a fan who saw you and got all creepy?" 

"Well if they are breaking into rooms to mess with me then they would be like a stalker right?" Harry dropped his hands from Niall's face. 

"I can go along with you saying someone was watching you, but baby nobody was in the room. Please stop making me repeat that." Niall pushes Harry out if his space taking a few steps away from him.

"Go along? I'm not some child making a story up Harry. There is nothing to 'go along' with. Jesus you either believe me or you don't." 

"Right fine." Harry marched across the room, shoulders hitting into Niall's as he passes.   
"I don't believe you. I don't think you are being watched I don't think anyone is messing with you and I don't think you're being stalked. It's completely far fetched and you are being paranoid."

"Why? Harry why would you think that? It's me and you, we support each other. We don't make out the other is crazy or paranoid or a liar. What's going on with you? Are you still pissed I didn't have sex with you? Because we had already fucked twice so it's not like you where deprived or anything." Harry grabs their bags from where they had been left by the door, face back to being blank as he made his way towards the stairs. 

"I'm just hungover. So let's just leave it yeah. I will call the hotel after I have showered. If your key is not there I will get you another one cut" Niall watches Harry go up the stairs shaking his head. 

He waits until he hears the shower turn on before walking out the door slamming the door hard enough that he knows Harry will hear it over the shower. 

Xxxxxxx

Whenever Niall is in Zayn's studio he feels the need to tuck his arms into his chest to avoid touching anything. Niall was never sure what work Zayn was planning on selling or what he had done for fun. Knowing his luck if he was to mess with something it would end up being important. 

"Matt will be back soon he is just dropping the kids of at his parents. I'm guessing from the look on your face we wont be going out tonight?"

"You mind?" Zayn passes Niall a protective mask for his mouth and nose before grabbing his keys for his spray paint room.

"Not really. Happy to do this right now, we can hang out still though. Watch a movie or something." Niall trails behind Zayn as he walks into the room flicking the light on. He can see over Zayn shoulder that he has already started work on something. A massive canvas that Niall knows from the look on Matt's face when Zayn had it delivered last week cost a load of money was hung up against the wall.

"This just for fun or commission?" Zany turned and leaned around Niall to close the door. 

"It's for the youth centre. They are trying to get the kids into expressing themselves and shit. I'm not gonna charge them. Think they are hoping they will find it cool and have a go at it. I'm gonna leave a big chunk of it blank for them to add too. Will probably leave a couple of cases of spray for them."

"I love you." Zayn chuckles, going over to his stereo. Zayn has a big heart and he thinks that is something that a lot of people don't take the time to see. Zayn can be dark. He is moody and he broods a lot and he puts his defences up around new people, something that has stuck with him from his childhood. Niall knows almost every single thing that makes Zayn who he is so he gets it. But to a newcomer he always comes across as a massive dick. Niall wished people could see that just from looking at him. Could see that he was treated badly by people he should have been able to trust and that he pulled himself out of it all and got himself where he is now. 

Niall can see  Zayn turning up at the youth centre all grumpy looking and scowling at anyone who looks his way. The kids will probably think he is super cool to be honest. 

Bring Me The Horizon starts to blare out so Niall snaps his mask on, Zayn doing the same across the room as he makes his way over to his paints.  He snaps his mask on and Niall moves a little closer to sit on the small table that is pushed to the wall. 

Zayn pulls his gloves on, looking over his shoulder at Niall before bending down to grab what he needed. 

Niall kind of misses the days when Zayn would come out of his studio with paint all over his hands. It would take days to wash off and sometimes when Niall was curled up on the sofa with him he would look at his hands like they where some kind of map. Try to work out Zayn's mood by what colours he had been using. But Rae had got into the habit of running up to him as soon as he ventured back up and after he had ruined one of her new dresses with paint stains he was demanded by Matt to start wearing gloves or not touch anything until he was washed. Now it must just be habit to wear them. 

Niall thinks if he was Matt he would rather enjoy some paint stains being put  on himself. Which is probably a really weird place to let his thoughts start going to.  Niall lets out a breath, leaning back against the wall so he can bring his feet up onto the table, arms wrapping around his knees. 

It was really relaxing to watch Zayn work. Which is why he had come here instead of going to Liam. He did not really want to talk about Harry's funny mood, or the weird stuff going on with himself. Liam had his own relationship to work on and fix at the moment anyway, he did not need Niall's crap on top of it. 

Zayn works for a solid hour before he drops the can he is holding back into his box yanking his gloves off and throwing them to the floor. Niall leans over to switch the music off, Bring Me The Horizon's album now playing for the second time. Niall's ears buzzed in the sudden quite, maybe sitting next to the speakers was not the best idea. Zayn made his way over to Niall, dragging a large plastic box with him so he could sit down by his legs. 

He patted Niall's feet so he dropped them from the table parting his knees so Zayn could wiggle between them, arm draping around his waist. He had some paint up his arms, red and green, so Niall reached down to run his fingers over it. Zayn pulled his mask off so Niall figures its fine for him to do the same placing it next to him on the table. 

"Want to tell me whats bothering you then?"

"Not really." Zayn narrowed his eyes, tugging Niall closer to him.

"Come on. I'm guessing there is a reason you are sat in here watching me instead of at home being all mushy with your boy. You where just at a wedding surly you two are wanting to be all romantic and dream about what your wedding would be like?"

"We had a fight at the wedding." Niall told Zayn about how he felt like he was being watched and about his notebook being moved and how it lead to him and Harry fighting, then again this morning when he noticed his key was gone. Zayn listened, eyebrows draw together in concern when Niall was talking about his notebook then turning into a deep frown when he said about Harry not believing him. 

"But why would you say it if you did not think it was true. Babes, Harry should be making you feel better about all this not making you feel like shit for voicing your concern. Since when does Harry act like such a dick?" Niall shrugs, hands coming together in his lap.

"Don't know. I think something else might be bothering him and its just coming out in a bad way. I mean yeah we where like about to have sex but Harry would never normally make me feel like shit if we stopped for any reason so I don't think it was about that. He seemed fine before we went back up to the room though so I don't know what could have happened to make him start acting this way. Maybe I just annoy him." 

"Oh Ni please don't think that. It's not even possible the man looks at you like you hung the fucking moon. You could never annoy him. You just need to talk to him and find out whats going on in his stupid head." Niall had asked him what was wrong though. Loads of times back at the hotel and again in the car and each time Harry had just gone silent and not answered him or just found something to snap about. They had such a nice time at the wedding with Louis family and some of Harry old school friends. Everyone got on really well and Niall was certain he had not done or said anything that could have upset Harry. They where defiantly fine with each other when they first went back up to the room. Harry must have had something going on in his head to make him so sensitive.

"What if its about the adoption." Zayn opens his mouth to reply but Niall cuts him off. "I know. I know what your going to say, it takes time. I know it takes time and that it could be a really long time yet and that their are loads of people waiting on the same list as us, including you and Matt. That's why I worry though. Harry could have been with a woman Z, and then I just throw myself at him. This kid who can't give him what he wants and maybe that was not fair of me to do. He would have probably settled down with some woman that Louis set him up with and she would have been like the size of a house right now with his baby." Zayn laughs, head falling forward to bump into Niall's leg.

"You being such a plonker. Right so lets take this scenario where Harry has this woman your so obsessed with. Who's to say she can even give him a baby? What if he fell for her and she can't get pregnant? What if she can but it takes months, maybe even years to happen. And then you have the nine month wait on top of that. So far you and Harry have been waiting just four and it could happen at any moment. You did not force Harry to fall in love with you, he done that all on his own. A straight couple can take just as long, sometimes even longer to fall pregnant then a gay couple will wait for an adoption to be complete. Harry will know this and Harry will never ever wish he was with someone else." Niall feels himself relax because yeah, Zayn is right. Harry would never think anything like that. It just felt like they had been waiting for so long, Niall can't help but feel like that is the problem every time him and Harry have an issue. 

"When we have sex he touches my stomach, like he wishes there was a baby there." Zayn shuffles back in his seat, hands dragging down Niall's leg until he has them hooked around his ankles.

"When my sister was pregnant with Elliott we spent so much time with her. We wanted to be there for as much as we could. The sickness, the kicks and wiggles, the heartburn. Like everything she experience we wanted to be a part of it. When she was about seven months pregnant she was massive, like I thought we had made this gigantic child that would eat all the food in the world." Niall giggled, leaning his elbow onto his knees as he listened to Zayn. "I got really, really jealous that she got to carry our child and I didn't. I hated that I was not able to take a part of me and Matt and grow it myself. So when I got home after spending the day with her once I shoved a pillow up my top and literally spent the rest of the day pretending to be pregnant. Made Matt have sex with me like it a couple of times too." Niall laugh loudly, head falling backwards the sound bouncing off the walls around them.

"Hey don't laugh at me." Zayn was laughing too  his grip on Niall's ankle tightening as he yanked him towards him again, Niall's butt now half way off the table. "What i'm trying to say is that I think that its normal. He wants a baby and probably thinks you would be pretty hot carrying one. Let him have his little fantasy.  Matt let me have mine and he might have felt upset that he could not give me what I want, but he made himself feel better by giving me some really good fake baby bump sex."

"Oh my god, you two are so adorable." Zayn rolls his eyes but has to nod in agreement. They fall into silence after that, Zayn looking up at Niall as he collects his thoughts. Niall thinks he could possible chill out a bit on the baby front and stop thinking Harry is resenting him for having to wait. Zayn was right, four months is no time at all and it's not like they had any reason they needed one to fall into their laps right this second. 

Who would have thought back at high school that Zayn Malik would be the person that chills Niall out about his adulthood problems.

"How come you did not ask one of the girls to help you two out with a baby?" 

"We talked about it but we couldn't really. At first we thought of Harry's sister but they are not that close so I think the experience would have been to weird for everyone. River was the next option but we could not expect her to have her own baby then start thinking about ours and with Macy and Cassie we figured their first time being pregnant should be with their own child not ours. So adoption was the best. It's so cool that your sister done that for you and Matt though." 

"Yeah. I think she feels bad about how our childhood was ya know. Like how she was the perfect child who could do no wrong and I was the piece of shit nobody really needed around." Niall reached out for Zayn his words making Niall's stomach twist up. Zayn leaned into his touch lips puckering as he kissed the palm of Niall's hand. 

"Don't feel bad for me. You get this stupid look on your face and it annoys me. Things are good now right. I have provided two grand babies and married a well off bloke with a good job and a six pack. I am now the star child." Zayn stands back up, patting Niall on the knee before heading back over to his paints.

"Do you think about it much? That past, high school and stuff?"

"Sometimes. Matt likes to get me to talk about it. Think it's programmed into him from work to make people talk about their feelings and shit." Niall watches Zayn for a bit as he puts the lids back on the cans, arranging them back into the box how he likes them. 

"What do you talk about?" Zayn pauses for a moment then stands back up hands resting on his hips.

"Just stuff really. When we first got married we used to talk about Mason a little, and you. Nowadays its mostly about the drugs."

"You still think about them?" Zayn sighs, scratching at the back of his neck.

"Everyday. I was an addict Ni. I am an addict, that does not go away. It nearly killed me. I don't think I will ever stop thinking about them or having to deal with the fact that temptation might come back one day and I wont be able to fight it. For now my kids are enough. I could wake up in the morning and my first thought could be that I really, really want to get high on something. Anything. Then I will have Rae running into the room or Elliott babbling through the baby monitor and it just goes away."

"Did you ever relapse, after being in rehab?" Zayn had never opened up about this to Niall before. They barely acknowledge the fact that him and Zayn has this really messy past. Everything was good now so they had never felt the need to bring it up. But if Zayn was up for talking then Niall was happy to keep it going. 

"Once. About a month after I got out. I was living with Matthew at his old place and I went out to Tesco to get some food before he got home from work. I saw my old dealer. I brought some cocaine and took it when I got home."

"Shit." 

"Yeah." Zayn crossed the room again, slotting himself between Niall's legs. 

"You don't do you? And when you where away you didn't like keep doing it right?" Niall circled his arms around Zayn bringing him closer.

"No, never again after that last time with you. I sometimes." Niall pauses pressing his nose to Zayn stomach, the smell of spray paint strong and burning a little. "I sometimes remember the feeling but I think it only felt good because everything else was so shit. Can't imagine I would be tempted now if someone offered me some. Sorry that you have to struggle so much with it. Wish you didn't." Zayn titled Niall head up to look at him, smiling. 

"I'm fine. One of the lucky ones really. Glad you forgave me for it all. You are like one of my favorite people." Zayn leaned forward until Niall was pressed to the wall, arms wrapping tighter around him as they hugged. The door creaked open and Matt stepped into the room smiling when he saw the two of him.

"Aww are we having a moment?"

"Yes and your ruining it." Matt chuckled stepping to the side, Harry walking into the room behind him.

"I picked up a stray." Zayn stepped back letting Niall get down off the table.

"Hey." Harry smiled, hands shoved into his pocket looking a little sheepish.

"Hey, do you mind if we have a chat. I think I have been a bit of an arse." Zayn scoffed. 

"A bit?" Niall nudged Zayn shooting him a look before walking over to Harry.

"Sure that would be nice. You gonna tell me whats up?" Harry sighed holding his hand out for Niall to take.

"Yeah, I will." Harry pulls Niall out of the room, closing the door behind him to give them some privacy. A few seconds later the music switches back on and Harry has Niall crowded in the corner foreheads pressed together. 

"I am really sorry for being snappy and starting the fight last night and this morning. I really love you and did not mean to make you feel shit." Niall leans up to give him a small kiss, to let him know he is already forgiven, then waits for him to continue.

"Last night, when you went outside to smoke i was talking to one of Louis mates. We went to school with him and I hated him then too. He was asking about me and you and obvious that's like my favorite subject. Anyway, he mentioned our age gap. Said something about when I'm forty your going to sill be in your twenties. Said I will be old before you and that you would probably want to trade me in for a younger model one day. I know that's not what your like so don't start nagging me but it did get me thinking. I just felt really old suddenly and he is kind of right. I'm going to be forty before you're even in your thirties. You are going to still want to be out with Liam and Zayn and i'm going to be too old to keep up." Niall tries not to, he really does but he cant help but start to laugh at how ridiculous Harry is. 

"Oh darlin'. You bloody stupid idiot. All this drama has been because some twat mentioned our ages. And here was me thinking that would never be an issue again. Harry I don't care about going out with Liam and Zayn. I want to be at home with you, I want kids and sitting in front of the telly by seven in our pj's with a cup of tea. Forty is not even old and that's five years away. The only keeping up you need to do with me is in the bedroom and i'm pretty sure when you are eighty you will still be getting it up for me every hour." Harry gigged, looking a lot more relaxed as he held on to Niall. 

"I know it was stupid. I just hate feeling old." 

"Oh love. What can I do to make you feel better again? What did you used to do when you where younger?  And don't say got married and became a dad. What did you do before that?" Harry blushed hiding his face into Niall's shoulder.

"I don't know. Went to parties with Lou. I guess I liked exploring stuff like...sexually. That used to make me feel pretty young and wild. Not that our sex makes me feel old or boring because its the most amazing thing ever. But you know that feeling when you do something for the first time and realise how good it is." Niall tries not to think about a young cherub faced Harry exploring all things sexual with other people. He gets it though. Harry doing something sexual to Niall for the first time was defiantly some of his highlights. Boys will be boys. 

"Well what can we do that we have not done before? Something to show us kids you can keep us on our toes." Harry pinches Niall bum and bites at his chin.

"Don't call yourself a kid. Is there anything we have not done? Other then like a threesome." Harry laughs like its a joke but yeah, that is something they have not done. Could Niall deal with someone else touching Harry? Maybe if its someone he trusted then he could. And he would be a part of it too so it would still be him having sex with Harry. 

Niall looks towards the closed door to Zayn's paint room with his eyes narrowed as he thought it over. 

"You forgive me for acting like a prick? I promise not to do it again." Niall nods giving Harry another short kiss. 

"Yeah course." He will have to bring up the subject of feeling like he could have a possible stalker situation going on but right after they have made up is probably not the best time. 

"You want to go home or go back in with them two?"

"Back in with them if its OK, just want to text Liam about something so hang on." Niall steps back a little so he knows Harry can't see his phone screen and brings up his messages with Zayn. 

 

Niall: Wanna have sex? 

 

Zayn replies surprisingly quick. 

Zayn: Wit u? H would kill me. So would my own husband actually. 

Niall: H would be there. He do the sex too ;) and Matt obvs. 

Zayn: Winky face, must be serious. 

Zayn: R u serious? 

Niall: Yeah. 

Zayn: m8 u left the room 5 secs ago what is even happening.

Niall: Haz sad. I wanna make him happy. You 2 fancy helping? 

Zayn: U r ridiculous. U actually being serious. Like all 4 of us? sex?

Niall: Yes loser. 1 off. Don't mention to Haz just see if we can get it there.  

Zayn: Jesus. 

Zayn: Big yes from us. 

Zayn: Fuck man. 

Niall: thanks! Always wanted to see Matts pee pee

Zayn: Tosser. 

"Right lets go back in."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sooooo the next part is going to be me playing out my little fantasy that I have had for a while ;) The chapter will have no important information in or anything strongly linked to the story line so if you start to read it and it is not your thing you can skip right to the end of the chapter. Normal Drama and shit will continue straight after. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blimey I struggled to think of a way to build these guys up to having some fun. How does this stuff happen naturally in real life? I guess it does not.   
> So I'm sorry about the lead up, but we are not here for that now are we 😉 hope you enjoy. Its not the best smut but I needed to get this out of my system before moving on with the storyline. 
> 
> This chapter does not need to be taken seriously. If you want you can read and then pretend it did not happen or you can skip altogether. 
> 
> I personally will always remember this moment because yum. Lots of smut heading your way

"Twister? You do realise I am halfway through my thirties right? Which is really depressing to say. We are not playing twister. Rethink while I go take a piss." Harry throws the twister box back on the table before leaving the room. 

Niall turns to Zayn, eyebrow raised and a laugh bubbling in his chest. 

"Twister? Really. That's the Zayn Malik move. I thought you said it was hot watching him Matt, not hilarious." Zayn raises his middle finger in the air snatching the box off the table and holding it to his chest. 

"I was not making a move dickhead. I just wanted to play." 

"Yeah we believe you." Matt patted Zayn on the head.  
"Screw you guys, I was not flirting. I haven't started yet. You will know when I start."

"How? You gonna get Connect Four out? Uno? Oh please get Uno that really gets me going." 

"I bet it does you freak. Bet you and Harry have the hottest sex after a round of old age pensioner games." 

"Yes because my boyfriend is really a pensioner right. Sorry I will trade him in for a twink." Matt looks up a mix between offended and amusement on his face. Zayn scoffs dropping the box back down.

"My husband is not a twink."

"I know, I was talking about you." Zayn's eyes narrowed and he takes a few steps towards Niall.

"Me? You calling me a twink?" Niall giggles taking a few of his own steps until he hits the table.   
"Yeah I am. If the boot fits and all that."  
"Oh the boots fits. Fits up your arse." Zayn leaps over the table with a cry knocking over board games as he lunges for Niall. Niall let's out a girly scream as they both tumble to the floor. 

They roll around on the floor fighting to get on top of each other pinching and tickling at whatever piece of body they can get to. 

"Alright children." Matt gets up trying to interfere, Zayn letting out a loud cackle when Niall finally gets his finger into his side's.   
"Playtime is over. You are going to break something you arseholes." Zayn gets his leg hooked over Niall's waist and flips them over so he is straddling Niall and starts trying to pin Niall's hands under his knees. 

"Say I'm not a twink."  
"Never!" Zayn finally gets Niall's hands under his knees and starts tickling his stomach. Niall screams head flying back into the floor with a thud.   
"No! Nooooo! I'm gonna puke!"  
"Zayn if he pukes on my carpet I swear to god I will kill you both!"   
"Say I'm not a twink bitch!" Niall shakes his head from side to side, laughing too much to talk. Zayn digs his fingers in harder, Niall stomach tensing and his legs kicking about to try and unbalanced Zayn.   
He finally manages to splutter out a 'twink' around his laughter and thinks he actually might be about to throw up when Zayn finally stops, wiggling up his body more.   
"Oh you're in for it." Zayn points out his fingers and start jabbing Niall on the forehead.  
"Ouch! Fuck off you annoying twink!"   
"Oh I'm annoying am I? Funny that I'm such an annoying twink when you want me to fuck you and your boyfriend." 

"Wants you to what?" Zayn stops poking at Niall and slowly turns to face Harry who has walked back into the room. 

"Well hi, you are back." Harry frowns looking from Niall to Zayn to Matt then make to Niall again. 

"I only went for a wee. Who's fucking who?" Matt let's out a loud sigh pushing Zayn off Niall.

"Niall wants me and Zayn to join you and him for some fun. Of the sexual kind. Zayn was going to seduce you but now you know so guess he does not have too." Harry frown deepens, arms coming up to cross over his chest. 

"Zayn would not be able to seduce me, just so you know. You want this Ni? Like for real? Us four?" Niall gets up, straightening out his top. 

"Well yeah if you do? Just thought it was something new to try. But I don't care if you don't want to. Just a suggestion." Harry looks at Niall for a while, a look on his face that Niall can't quite work out. 

Oh god. What if Harry just thinks Niall wants to do this just to fuck Matt and Zayn. Want if he was about to lose his shit? 

"And you two, you would be alright with this?" 

"Yeah sure, me and Matt do stuff like this sometimes. It's fun." Harry walks over to Niall hooking his arms around his waist. 

"And how does it normally go?" The room stays quite for a while, the atmosphere around them all suddenly feeling thick and heavy. Eventually Matt clears his throat to answer Harry. 

"Well normally we go out and I will pick someone for Zayn. He will get them to agree to come home with us. Then when we get home he will go upstairs with them and get started and I will go into the room after a few minutes. I either just watch or join in." Harry doesn't take his eyes away from Niall the whole time Matt talks and Niall still can't work out what Harry could be thinking. 

Should he try and play this off as a joke? He has no idea if Harry was about to to along with this or say they are all ridiculous. 

"Well then." Niall watches Harry as he thinks about it? Comes to terms with his boyfriend being a freak? Who knows. His grip on Niall's waist tightens before he lets go completely stepping back.   
"Why don't you take him upstairs then Z? Get him started for us?" Holy shit. Holy bloody shit. They where actually going to do this. 

"Shit really? Yeah. Fuck. I can do that." 

"Don't say yes to this just because you think I want it." Harry smiles, crowding back into Niall's space to kiss him softly. 

"I wouldn't baby. I want this too yeah. Think it would be hot. And I don't think it will be weird after. Just this once though right? Don't want to keep sharing you." Niall shakes his head reaching up to tangle his fingers into Harry hair. 

"Just once, for fun. Never have to share me ever again. All yours." 

"Good. Go with Zayn then, that's a good boy." Niall practically melts at that and god yeah, he does want to be a good boy for him. For them all. 

Zayn takes his hand tugging him towards the stairs. Niall hears Matt ask Harry to go into the kitchen with him then he is being yanked up the stairs and lead down the hallway to Matt and Zayn's room.

Niall has actually never been inside Zayn and Matt's room and he never thought the first time being in here would be to have sex with them. That should be wierd, but it's not, it so should be. 

Zayn crosses the room to close the curtains while Niall looks around. The walls are painted a light shade of purple, Zayn's art framed and hung all over the place. The bed is in the middle of the room, large with thick cream coloured bed sheets. It was obvious, to Niall at least, that Matt had decorated this room. It was nice, and he was about to have sex in it. Jesus. 

"Hey you good?" Niall turns back to Zayn putting a smile on his face. He was good, nervous. Definitely nervous. He had no idea how this kind of thing worked but he trusted Matt and Zayn to know what they were doing and to make him feel comfortable through the whole thing.

"Yeah. Just this is happening. Thought it would take a bit longer, thought Harry would need more time to agree to it and stuff." Zayn takes one of Niall's hands pulling him closer the other hand resting on his waist the tips of his fingers tucking under his top to rest against his skin. 

"I think Harry is pretty open minded about most things, I knew it wouldn't take much. You certain about this though? I don't want you to regret it and have it mess with your relationship with Harry. Or our friendship, you are one of my favourite people so don't go all funny and start ignoring me." Niall huffs out a laugh sliding his hands up around Zayn's neck. He notices his hands are shaking so he curls them into fist. 

"It won't I promise. You are one of my favourite people too. Impossible to ignore you really." Zayn steps closer, arms going around Niall's waist. 

"Yeah?" He leans down until their noses are touching. Niall swollows, his heart starting to beat faster sending his blood rushing around his body making him feel warm and fuzzy. 

"Yeah." There is the lightest touch to Niall's lips but it's enough to make him gasp and lean into Zayn more, his hands uncurling and cupping the back of Zayn's head. Zayn looks at him for a bit, waiting to see if Niall will push him away. When he is sure Niall is happy, and Niall is sure that yes he can do this Zayn moves again and closes the gap between them.

It's not like kissing Harry. Niall never thought it would be. Buts it soft and warm and still feels a little bit like home. It makes Niall tingle and it has him holding onto Zayn a little tighter as their lips move together, tasting and exploring. It takes a few seconds for Niall to even work out how to kiss Zayn, because he knows exactly what to do when it comes to Harry. They find a rhythm though and then it gets deeper, harder more desperate. Zayn lick across Niall's bottom lip, bites down on it gentle then Niall is opening up for him letting him lick in and taste him. 

He taste like smoke, like late night conversations. Whispered secrets and soft giggles. There is another taste too, something new and intimate that has Niall's toes curling and his hand clawing at Zayn's top wanting more and closer and faster. 

Zayn pulls back long enough to take his top of, his breath coming out hard and shaky before he pulls Niall's head towards him lips crashing together. 

They tumble back onto the bed, Niall on his back with his legs parting to let Zayn in both groaning into the kiss when their crotches touch. 

Zayn pulls away from the kiss to start moving down Niall's neck, hands tugging up the bottom of his top until it's bunched under his armpit. 

"You still ok?" Niall nods, gripping onto Zayn's hair and tugging slightly on the short strands.   
"Yeah all good." Niall voice is shaking, heavy with how turned on he is getting from having Zayn this way. 

His top is pulled off and Zayn is kissing down his chest, fingers working on the button of his jeans.   
Niall can see the muscles in Zayn back as he goes lower and lower. His caramel skin making his own milky white look even paler. He thinks they actually look good together, skin to skin.   
"Oh god." Zayn's tounge pushes under the waist band of his jeans before he yanks them down a little to start kissing around the sensitive skin. 

Niall grips onto the bedsheets eyes flicking over to the door.   
When was Harry going to get up here? 

"How long.. holy Jesus...how long are they gonna be?" Zayn lifts his head up, Niall's jeans now halfway down his legs, his boxers only just covering his semi.   
"Not to long. He is just giving me time to get you all naked and ready." Zayn waggles his eyebrows, which is ridiculous when his face is right near his dick. God he is so casual about this. 

How did Matt even find out he like watching Zayn do this? Or did Zayn find out he liked being watched first. Maybe he should ask when his dick is not about to be on show for one of his mates. 

"You're over thinking."   
"I'm not. I just realised you're about to see my dick is all." Zayn crawls back up Niall's body until he is hovering above his head, hand either side of him pressing into the mattress.   
"We are both about to see a lot of dick. Which just sounds like an awful lot of fun to me." Niall rolls his eyes, shifting his hips. He was getting uncomfortably hard now. 

"Right so what's next?" Zayn moves back down again hooking his fingers into Niall's boxers and after looking up at Niall he pulls then down to join his jeans. 

Niall looks up at the ceiling. This could possibly be the most naked he has ever felt. He waits until Zayn has removed his clothes completly before looking back down again. Zayn is looking straight down at his cock, lip pulled in between his teeth.   
"What's next Zayn?" Zayn shakes his head, blinking a few times before smiling.   
"Sorry. Umm I am going to get you opened up if that's ok?" Ok. Yeah, ok he can totally deal with Zayn's fingering him. Obviously that would be apart of doing this. Someone's fingers had to go in him at some point.   
"Alright then. Cool." Zayn laughs reaching over Niall to open the draw by the bed. When he settles back down again he has a bottle of lube in his hand and starts to wiggle out of his own jeans.   
"You normally bottom right?"  
"Why would you say that?" Zayn raises his eyebrow shotting a look.  
"Because I have eyes. Plus you were like ten when you and Harry started fucking, that would have been weird if you topped." Niall raised his foot to kick Zayn on the side of the head.   
"Dickhead. I was sixteen, and I top sometimes I have you know. But yes I prefer to bottom so I am perfectly fine with fingers in me arse. If that's what you were wondering." Zayn pops the bottle open squeezing some lube onto his fingers. 

"Yes if was. Legs." Niall parts his legs again letting out a huff as he wiggle's down the bed a little. Zayn moved so he was laying beside Niall, his top half raised over him. Niall laid his head back looking straight into Zayn's eyes finding it oddly calming.   
"You ready?" Niall nodded, watching the movement of Zayn's throat as he swollowed.   
"Ok. Can't believe I'm about to have my fingers inside you." Niall laughs reaching up to tug Zayn's face closer to his.  
"Not how I thought my day would end when I got up this morning." Zayn hummed in agreement before connecting their lips. They kissed lazily for a few seconds before Niall felt the prod of Zayn finger against his hole. He breathed in, deepening the kiss his hands digging into Zayn's shoulders as he pushed the first finger in.   
"Oh..oh god." Niall closed his eyes letting the feel of Zayn's finger dragging inside him take over. 

Zayn pushes his tounge past his lips at the same time as pulling his finger out and adding another. Nialls legs fall apart more his hips raising slightly. He moaned loudly, the heels of his feet digging into the bed and his head turning to the side breaking the kiss.   
"You ok?"  
"Yes! Yes fuck, please stop asking if I'm ok. Feels so good, another. Please." Zayn pushes a third finger into Niall, leaning up a little so he can look down at him better.   
"You look...I didn't think." He stops, shakes his head then falls down to kiss Niall again moaning when Niall does. 

He starts fucking his fingers into him faster, flicking his wrist up when he pushes in then stretching them as he moves back. 

This is how Matt and Harry find them. Tangled up together, naked and moaning Zayn's fingers working quickly inside Niall. 

Harry makes his way to the bed straight away, leaning around Zayn and grabbing his hair to yank his head away from Niall. 

Niall gasps, eyes wide and almost completely black as he looks up at Harry who shoots him a smirk, dimples popping before he turns Zayn's head towards him and kisses him.

Niall moans loudly eyes glued to where their lips are moving together. Zayn's finger still as he kisses Harry back eagerly making Niall whine and roll his hips doing the work for him. 

He is more then ready, is open enough to take any of them but this feels good. Watching Harry and Zayn kiss while he fucks himself down on Zayn's fingers, Matt moving around them slowing taking off his clothes and just watching. 

Harry breaks the kiss, Zayn's bottom lip between his teeth and Zayn whimpers. Actually whimpers when Harry releases it and it has Niall's cock twitching and leaking on his stomach. 

Harry wraps his hand around Zayn's wrist and pulls, sliding Zayn fingers out from Niall slowly knowing he will enjoy the drag of it. 

Niall turns his face into the pillow, arousal burning in his stomach making him pant and gasp. 

Harry stands up from the bed to remove his clothes, Matt coming up behind him to help and place small kiss on his exposed skin. Zayn is sitting back on his knees eyes flicking between Niall and Harry his tounge darting out to lick at his lips. 

When Harry gets back on the bed, naked and hard, Zayn reaches for him straight away hand curling around his cock and slowly tugging it once. Harry judders, lips parting in a silent moan as he grabs the lube by Niall's waist. Zayn takes it from him letting go off his cock to squirt some into his hand before grabbing Harry again to spread it over his cock. 

Harry moans, his own hand wrapping around Zayn's to get him to squeeze harder. Zayn let's out a shaky breath and a quite 'fuck' his hand speeding up. 

It's so much just laying there open and ready and seeing Zayn's hand working over Harry's getting Harry ready to be inside him. 

"Come on. Come on already." Zayn chuckles releasing Harry and sliding to the edge of the bed. 

"Getting desperate there Ni?" Niall grones and is about to snap back when Harry grabs his legs and yanks him down to the end of the bed until his legs are dangling off, feet on the floor. Zayn moves to lay above Niall's head, hand curling into his hair. Harry stands between Niall's legs, bending with his right knee pressing into the mattress and lifts Niall hips up. Matt slides a pillow under Niall's butt before sitting down next to him. 

He can hear the slick sound of Zayn and Matt kissing above his head and then Harry is finally pushing into him. 

Niall moans head falling back and his hands grabbing for anything to hold on to which turns out to be Matt's leg and Zayn's hand. Harry stills once he is fully in, hips pushing into Niall as he lets out a small grunt and adjusts himself until he can comfortably hold himself up. 

Once he is ready he pulls out until only the head is inside Niall then he slams back in sending Niall's body jolting up the bed a little. 

Zayn moves to his side kissing him as Harry keeps up a steady pace, fucking into him hard. Niall barely kisses Zayn back, just moans into his mouth and licks up past his lips to get a taste of him. 

He can feels Matt's hand all over him, sliding down to his lower stomach before dragging back up to play with his nipple's making him shiver and gasp. 

It's an awful lot to feel at once. Harry inside him while Zayn kisses him and Matt is just everywhere else. 

"Can I taste him?" He pulls back from Zayn's kiss at the sound of Matt's voice. He is talking to Harry, asking Harry permission and that almost has Niall spilling over his stomach.

"Yeah, fuck yeah." Matt moves down the bed a little and takes Niall's cock into his mouth.   
"Uhh shit." Niall grabs the back of Zayn's head smashing their lips back together. 

Matt takes him all the way down until his cock is nudging the back of his throat and then he slowly lifts back up tounge swirling to taste every inch of him. 

"Oh god." Niall head drops back down, eyes screwed shut as he lets everything wash over him. The drag of Harry cock and the wet warm heat of Matts mouth at the same time.

"I'm getting close. Holy fuck yeah, its so much. Gonna come." He doesn't want to come yet, and he knows Harry does not want him to either. He can tell by the way he is fucking him, purposefully avoiding hitting his prostate. 

Matt removes his mouth from Niall so he can grip the base of his cock and squeeze hard, stopping Niall from being able to come. 

"Us first yeah?" He leans over to kiss up Niall's neck, nibbling on his jawline a little.   
"We are going to use you and we get to come first. Then it's your turn if you have been a good boy." Harry moans loudly, cursing as his hips still and he spills into Niall. He fucks into him gently a couple more times before letting out a quite sigh and pulling out. 

"Matt you next." Matt and Harry swap places, Harry tucking himself right into Niall side and tucking his arm under Niall head.  
"You good baby?" Niall nods, turning his face into Harry chest nosing at the slightly damp skin before kissing it.   
"Love you."   
"Love you too." 

Matt moves Niall's legs a little, placing one of his feet onto the bed to change the angle.   
"Zayn make sure he doesn't come." Zayn nods and takes Niall's cock in his hand gripping it like Matt had.   
"I could still come." Zayn lip quirks then he closes his hand around Niall even tighter making him hiss out and push into Harry more.   
"Ok fuck, I won't." Zayn nods then turns back to Matt, Harry chuckling into Niall's hair. 

When Matt pushes in it feels so different to Harry that Niall jolts away from him at first, like his body doesn't want to accept anyone that is not Harry. Matt grips on to his waist to hold him and Harry pushes down on his shoulder. 

Harry is thicker, makes him feel more full but Matt is longer and manages to hit Niall prostate as soon as he pushes in. Nialls crys out, cock leaking in Zayn's hand as his body tenses up.   
"Fuck! Oh fucking hell Matt. Shit." Matt bends down to kiss across Niall chest before moving to kiss Zayn. 

His moves his hips slowly, only just brushing against Niall spot so it's not enough to make him want to come but it's enough to tease him and have him trashing and bending about on the bed. 

Harry is all over him. Kissing his face and running his finger in his hair before traveling over every part of his body he can reach. His hand trails down to his arse a couple of times feeling where Matt is sliding into him. His pushes a finger in just slightly next to Matt's cock and it makes Niall black out for a second so that it's all stars and white noise and so much pressure. 

He gets close a few times, turning into a moaning sobbing mess, swatting at Zayn's hand to try and get him to let go or to move. Anything to let him come. 

He is only just aware of Matt coming inside him and then he is empty again. 

His foot falls back to the floor with a thud and before he gets a chance to relax his body Harry is grabbing him and moving him so his head is now at the end of the bed, hanging down slightly. 

"You still ok Niall?" It's Zayn asking him, as he gets himself comfortable between Niall's legs, kneeling.   
"Yeah. Wanna come." Zayn hooks Niall's legs over his shoulder, hands smoothing down his legs before gripping his waist.  
"Soon." He leans forward slightly and Niall lifts his head to see him. 

"Your turn?" Zayn smiles and it's so soft that a warmth spreads in Niall's chest and he finds himself reaching out to touch Zayn's face without really knowing he was doing it.   
"Yeah my turn." Zayn turns his head to the side to kiss the palm of Niall's hand.   
"Want you to kiss me." Zayn nods, a look flicking over his face before he goes back to normal leaning down so he can kiss Niall.   
It's slow and sweet and then Zayn is pushing into him, both of them gasping at the feel. 

Niall is so wet now and he can hear it as Zayn goes deeper, some of Harry and Matt's come being pushed out. Niall has no way to know who it belongs to and it's so much hotter then Niall thought it would be. 

"You feel good. So good around me Niall. Can't wait to fill you up even more." Niall kisses the corner of Zayn mouth, holding his lips there as they rock together. 

"Need you to tilt your head back babes. Think Harry can come again." Niall does as he is asked, head falling off the edge of the bed and mouth falling open straight away. Harry smiles down at him, running his thumb under Niall's chin before sliding between Niall's lips. 

Zayn's hand is resting across the column of his throat which is just, fuck. It's so fucking good.   
Each of Zayn thrust have Harry's cock sliding deeper into his mouth until he is hitting the back of Niall throat and he is having to swollow and open all at once making him gag and splutter until he is used to it. 

He must look obsence. Spread out on the bed. Legs over Zayn's shoulders, back arching off the bed and head thrown back as he takes both of them. 

"Not gonna last, so fucking tight." Zayn's head drops and his movements speed up turning more erratic as he get closer. 

Niall places his hand flat on Harry stomach breathing heavily out of his nose trying his hardest to take them both. 

Harry goes first coming down Niall throat. Nialls swollows it all, choking a little his chest convulsing with the effort of taking it all. The sights sends Zayn over and he slams into Niall one more time and comes, crying out Niall's name. 

Harry steps back stroking across Niall's face as he gasp for air. Zayn stays inside him bending over to take Niall into his mouth. 

"Now it's your turn." Niall looks over at Matt and then with a sob starts coming. Zayn's hold on him tightens to a painful grip that has him shooting into his mouth even more, some of it spilling out from Zayn's mouth and dripping down his chin.  
"Oh fuck." His eyes roll and his body sags into the bed as Zayn works his tounge over his cock to lick up every drop. 

Once he is done he pulls of with a wet pop a satifised smile on his face.   
They start talking but Niall can't take in what they are saying. He feel floppy and so, so tired and his lower back is starting to ache already but he feel so good. 

Harry moves him again tucking him up by the pillows and tugging the duvet out from underneath him so he can lay it over him. 

Nialls eyes flutter open and closed as the others move around the room talking softly making Niall feel more relaxed. 

Eventually Harry climbs into the bed, tucking into Niall's front and wrapping his arms around his waist. Zayn slides in behind him and Niall thinks he might be holding Harry's hand, and then Matt gets in behind Zayn. 

Niall let's out a small giggle. Because he actually just got fucked by three people in one night.   
"You happy Harry?" Harry hums kissing Niall's nose.  
"Always happy when I'm with you. Love you sweet boy."   
"Love you too. Love you guys." Niall yawns eyes slipping closed again.  
"Love you Ni."   
"Love you Irish." Naill smiles drifting off to sleep and hopes to god he can laugh about this in the morning. 

Xxxx

When Niall wakes up in the morning the other three are still asleep and wrapped around him.  
He feels hot, sticky and sore. He kind of loves it. 

He has to wiggle down under the duvet and slide off the end of the bed to get out without disturbing the others. 

He looks back tempted to find his phone and take a photo of the three snuggled up in bed. But knowing his luck Liam or River will find it and nobody needs that to happen. 

He pulls on his clothes from yesterday wincing at the wetness still in his arse before leaving the room.  
Drink, food then shower. 

He plods through the house, bare feet slapping on the floor as he goes into the kitchen and straight to the kettle to fill it with water and flick it on. 

He goes into the cereal cupboard already knowing he is going to be stealing some of Rae's cereal. Not that she would mind, Niall is her favourite person after all. 

Niall has his hand around the box when he hears footsteps behind him. 

"Oh hey." Niall smiles over his shoulder at Harry, hand still clutching the box of Rae's cereal. "I was just gonna have some food then wake ya." Harry doesn't reply so Niall drops his hand from the boxs and turns towards him. 

Was he regretting last night? What was he going to do if he did? Would they be ok? 

Harry grabs Niall's waist pulling him harshly away from the counter before spinning him around and shoving him forward into the wall beside the fridge. 

"Harry." Niall gasps, Harry yanks his jeans down just enough to expose his arse before shoving two fingers into Niall's mouth. Nialls head tips back his lips stretching around the digets as Harry slowly pushes them into his mouth until Niall is gasping and gagging around them. He holds them there for a second forcing Niall to work his throat around them, spit already gathering in his mouth. His cock is hardening in his jeans already, his pulse quickening. Harry finally drags his fingers out, pinching at Niall's bottom lip harshly before realising it. 

"You are mine." Harry knocks Niall's hips towards him so Niall's lower back is arched and pushes two fingers into him. Niall cries out, eyes screwing shut at the sudden intrusion.   
"Still so open and wet from letting everyone fuck you." Niall drops his head forward, the wall cold against his skin. Harry removed his fingers again, using his clean hand do grab a fistful of Niall's hair and yank his head back.   
"Look baby." He holds his fingers up in front of Niall. "Look how messy my fingers are already. Don't even know who's come it is do you? Spent all night with all our come dripping out of you like some slut"   
"Oh god." Niall feels so turned on it's almost overwhelming. His knees are shaking with the effort to stay standing for Harry, his cock so hard it was starting to hurt where it was pushing into the thick material if his jeans. 

Harry pushes himself flat against Niall's back pressing Niall into the wall more. The pressure against Niall cock has him juddering and letting out a breathy little moan. The metal from Harry's jeans is rubbing against the skin of his arse and god he just wants Harry to fuck him, or something. Anything.   
"Harry please."  
"Please what? Please fuck you? Please make you come?" Niall nods turning his head to the side to see Harry.  
"Do you deserve it?" He grabs Niall's chin shoving his face back to look at the wall.   
"Letting them fuck you. Letting then use you. Did you enjoy it? Matt and Zayn being inside you? Their come filling you up?" Flashes from last night go through Niall's head. Zayn's hand and lips. Matt pushing into him, how they tasted.  
"Of course you did. Like a proper little whore." Harry moves back, his hand wrapping around the back of Niall's neck and squeezing hard enough to have Niall go slack. His other hand was working on the button and zip of his jeans quickly pulling then down to his knees.   
Niall tries to calm his breathing, is only just aware of how erratic it actually is. His head has gone fuzzy and everything is just a jumble of Harry and how badly he needs to get off right now. 

"Going to treat you like the whore you seem to love being so much." Harry pushes into Niall in one go, hips slamming into the flesh of his arse. Nialls cry is loud enough that Harry thinks it could wake Matt and Zayn, which good. Let them hear how good he fucks his boy. 

He grabs both of Niall's wrist in one hand holding them above his head and pressing then into the wall, his other hand gripping at his waist to keep his arse arched out for him as he starts to pound into Niall as hard as he can. 

Niall moans come out chocked, the first moan mixing in with the second until it's just a mess of sounds that have Harry almost coming then and there. Harry didn't let up, keeps slamming into Niall and it's so fucking good. Almost too good and also like torture because his dick is still trapped in his jeans and he just needs it out and he needs to get his hand on it.   
"Harry, please I need.."  
"Need what? Need more? Want me to get your cock out baby? Want me to make you come?" Niall nods, hands straining in Harry grip. His head falls back onto Harry shoulders but then Harry is grabbing the back of his neck again, fingers digging in as he pushes Niall head back up.   
He manages to keep the pace going, Niall's body jolting harshly each time Harry fucks into him.   
"You're being so good. Taking me so well, so open and wet from them that you didn't even need me to get you ready. Not sure you have been good enough for me to let you come though." Niall grones, tugging his hands again, his hips bucking.  
"Think your cock should stay exactly where it is." Niall pushes back against Harry and he is not even sure what he is trying to do. Get fucked harder so maybe he could come or get Harry off him so he can do it himself.   
Harry responds by pushing back twice as hard, stopping all his movements as he slams Niall back into the wall pressing him forward until he is standing poker straight. 

Harry moans, kissing at the back off Nialls neck almost coming with how tight Niall feels around him stood like this. 

"Move. Fucking move." Niall tried to stick his arse out again to feel the drag of Harrys cock inside him but Harry is stronger and Niall barely moves at all. This is worse. Having Harry inside him but not moving is so much worse then when he was fucking him hard and not letting him get anywhere near coming. 

"Say you're mine. Only mine." Niall swollows, he wants to kiss Harry. Turn around in his arms and kiss his softly while telling him that he really is only his. 

"I'm yours. Belong to you and only you, I only ever want you. Love you Harry, love you so much please." Harry's hand moves up Niall's top, feeling the soft skin of his stomach, the small bump of his nipple and the hardnest to his chest before coming out of the collar to wrap around his neck. He grips until he hears Niall gasp, struggle for breath like he knows he likes then he starts to fuck him again. 

Nialls moans are barely there, just small little gasp that manage to get out around Harry's hand gripping as his throat. The sound of skin slapping on skin is louder now that Niall's moans have been practically silenced and it has shivers going up Harry's spine. He looks down, can see himself disappearing into Niall's tight hole. He moans pressing more kisses into Niall's neck as his stomach starts to tighten. The warmth spreads up from his balls to his chest and he has just enough time to release Niall's neck to quickly move down to gently release his cock.   
"Oh god, oh fuck yes Harry." Harry grips him hard, pumping his cock fast his movements becoming sloppy as he get closer to coming.  
"I'm coming. I'm coming." Harry feels Niall's whole body tense and curl into him, his arse squeezing around his cock. He lets go on Niall's wrist and he keeps then there raised above his head like he has not even notched Harry's grip leave and it has another wave of warmth rush over him. He cups his hand in front of Niall's cock just in time to catch his come. It spills over his fist and hits his hand for what feels like ages. Niall is now flopping against him, arms falling down to his side as he comes and comes.   
"So good. So fucking good. Shit yeah." Harry starts coming, body jolting as he spills inside Niall pressing as close to him as he can not caring that he is getting his come covered hands all over him.   
"Fuck." He keeps moving slowly, waiting for his high to finish a few more spurts of come leaving him.   
He stops with a grunt, now so aware of how sweaty both him and Niall are making their skin tacky and their clothes cling to them. Harry stomach muscles are burning and when he looks down he can see the skin around Niall arse already turning read from where his hips had been slamming into him. They look a mess, but Niall looks so fucked out Harry really could not care less. 

He pulls out of Niall gentle, thumb rubbing in soothing circles when Niall let's out a whine at the feeling. 

"Woah" They both turn their heads towards the doorway where Zayn and Matt are both standing.   
"They was fucking hot." Harry grones pulling his and Niall's trousers back up. He pulls Niall away from the wall holding him to his chest. 

"Well I'm glad you enjoyed. We are going to take a shower now." Niall holds tightly onto Harry, legs like jelly as they go upstairs and into the bathroom. 

Harry undresses him before removing his own clothes then leans around Niall to turn the shower on.   
"You ok?" Niall nods. He is dazed, head still fuzzy and he feel like he is outside of his body watching as Harry kisses around his face and smooths his hand over his hair.   
"Yeah. Love you. Really, really love you." Harry smiles pressing a small soft kiss to Niall's lips.   
"I love you too baby. A ridiculous amount." Niall giggles poking at Harry's stomach before letting himself be lead into the shower so Harry can wash them both down. 

"In all seriousness did you enjoy last night?" Harry asks while lathering shampoo in Niall's hair, making sure to keep skin to skin contact with him.   
"Yeah I did. Did you? You don't regret it?"   
"No. I had fun. Was hot seeing you like that. Don't think I need to do it again mind. Feel a bit possessive now." Niall laughs leaning his head back to rise of the shampoo.   
"Really I didn't notice. But same, we don't need to do it again. Just you and me from now on for like forever." Harry brings Niall's head back to kiss him.  
"Forever. That sounds nice." Niall nuzzles into Harry's neck enjoying the warmth of him and the water washing over them.  
"Forever." 

 

"Twister? You do realise I am halfway through my thirties right? Which is really depressing to say. We are not playing twister. Rethink while I go take a piss." Harry throws the twister box back on the table before leaving the room. 

Niall turns to Zayn, eyebrow raised and a laugh bubbling in his chest. 

"Twister? Really. That's the Zayn Malik move. I thought you said it was hot watching him Matt, not hilarious." Zayn raises his middle finger in the air snatching the box off the table and holding it to his chest. 

"I was not making a move dickhead. I just wanted to play." 

"Yeah we believe you." Matt patted Zayn on the head.  
"Screw you guys, I was not flirting. I haven't started yet. You will know when I start."

"How? You gonna get Connect Four out? Uno? Oh please get Uno that really gets me going." 

"I bet it does you freak. Bet you and Harry have the hottest sex after a round of old age pensioner games." 

"Yes because my boyfriend is really a pensioner right. Sorry I will trade him in for a twink." Matt looks up a mix between offended and amusement on his face. Zayn scoffs dropping the box back down.

"My husband is not a twink."

"I know, I was talking about you." Zayn's eyes narrowed and he takes a few steps towards Niall.

"Me? You calling me a twink?" Niall giggles taking a few of his own steps until he hits the table.   
"Yeah I am. If the boot fits and all that."  
"Oh the boots fits. Fits up your arse." Zayn leaps over the table with a cry knocking over board games as he lunges for Niall. Niall let's out a girly scream as they both tumble to the floor. 

They roll around on the floor fighting to get on top of each other pinching and tickling at whatever piece of body they can get to. 

"Alright children." Matt gets up trying to interfere, Zayn letting out a loud cackle when Niall finally gets his finger into his side's.   
"Playtime is over. You are going to break something you arseholes." Zayn gets his leg hooked over Niall's waist and flips them over so he is straddling Niall and starts trying to pin Niall's hands under his knees. 

"Say I'm not a twink."  
"Never!" Zayn finally gets Niall's hands under his knees and starts tickling his stomach. Niall screams head flying back into the floor with a thud.   
"No! Nooooo! I'm gonna puke!"  
"Zayn if he pukes on my carpet I swear to god I will kill you both!"   
"Say I'm not a twink bitch!" Niall shakes his head from side to side, laughing too much to talk. Zayn digs his fingers in harder, Niall stomach tensing and his legs kicking about to try and unbalanced Zayn.   
He finally manages to splutter out a 'twink' around his laughter and thinks he actually might be about to throw up when Zayn finally stops, wiggling up his body more.   
"Oh you're in for it." Zayn points out his fingers and start jabbing Niall on the forehead.  
"Ouch! Fuck off you annoying twink!"   
"Oh I'm annoying am I? Funny that I'm such an annoying twink when you want me to fuck you and your boyfriend." 

"Wants you to what?" Zayn stops poking at Niall and slowly turns to face Harry who has walked back into the room. 

"Well hi, you are back." Harry frowns looking from Niall to Zayn to Matt then make to Niall again. 

"I only went for a wee. Who's fucking who?" Matt let's out a loud sigh pushing Zayn off Niall.

"Niall wants me and Zayn to join you and him for some fun. Of the sexual kind. Zayn was going to seduce you but now you know so guess he does not have too." Harry frown deepens, arms coming up to cross over his chest. 

"Zayn would not be able to seduce me, just so you know. You want this Ni? Like for real? Us four?" Niall gets up, straightening out his top. 

"Well yeah if you do? Just thought it was something new to try. But I don't care if you don't want to. Just a suggestion." Harry looks at Niall for a while, a look on his face that Niall can't quite work out. 

Oh god. What if Harry just thinks Niall wants to do this just to fuck Matt and Zayn. Want if he was about to lose his shit? 

"And you two, you would be alright with this?" 

"Yeah sure, me and Matt do stuff like this sometimes. It's fun." Harry walks over to Niall hooking his arms around his waist. 

"And how does it normally go?" The room stays quite for a while, the atmosphere around them all suddenly feeling thick and heavy. Eventually Matt clears his throat to answer Harry. 

"Well normally we go out and I will pick someone for Zayn. He will get them to agree to come home with us. Then when we get home he will go upstairs with them and get started and I will go into the room after a few minutes. I either just watch or join in." Harry doesn't take his eyes away from Niall the whole time Matt talks and Niall still can't work out what Harry could be thinking. 

Should he try and play this off as a joke? He has no idea if Harry was about to to along with this or say they are all ridiculous. 

"Well then." Niall watches Harry as he thinks about it? Comes to terms with his boyfriend being a freak? Who knows. His grip on Niall's waist tightens before he lets go completely stepping back.   
"Why don't you take him upstairs then Z? Get him started for us?" Holy shit. Holy bloody shit. They where actually going to do this. 

"Shit really? Yeah. Fuck. I can do that." 

"Don't say yes to this just because you think I want it." Harry smiles, crowding back into Niall's space to kiss him softly. 

"I wouldn't baby. I want this too yeah. Think it would be hot. And I don't think it will be weird after. Just this once though right? Don't want to keep sharing you." Niall shakes his head reaching up to tangle his fingers into Harry hair. 

"Just once, for fun. Never have to share me ever again. All yours." 

"Good. Go with Zayn then, that's a good boy." Niall practically melts at that and god yeah, he does want to be a good boy for him. For them all. 

Zayn takes his hand tugging him towards the stairs. Niall hears Matt ask Harry to go into the kitchen with him then he is being yanked up the stairs and lead down the hallway to Matt and Zayn's room.

Niall has actually never been inside Zayn and Matt's room and he never thought the first time being in here would be to have sex with them. That should be wierd, but it's not, it so should be. 

Zayn crosses the room to close the curtains while Niall looks around. The walls are painted a light shade of purple, Zayn's art framed and hung all over the place. The bed is in the middle of the room, large with thick cream coloured bed sheets. It was obvious, to Niall at least, that Matt had decorated this room. It was nice, and he was about to have sex in it. Jesus. 

"Hey you good?" Niall turns back to Zayn putting a smile on his face. He was good, nervous. Definitely nervous. He had no idea how this kind of thing worked but he trusted Matt and Zayn to know what they were doing and to make him feel comfortable through the whole thing.

"Yeah. Just this is happening. Thought it would take a bit longer, thought Harry would need more time to agree to it and stuff." Zayn takes one of Niall's hands pulling him closer the other hand resting on his waist the tips of his fingers tucking under his top to rest against his skin. 

"I think Harry is pretty open minded about most things, I knew it wouldn't take much. You certain about this though? I don't want you to regret it and have it mess with your relationship with Harry. Or our friendship, you are one of my favourite people so don't go all funny and start ignoring me." Niall huffs out a laugh sliding his hands up around Zayn's neck. He notices his hands are shaking so he curls them into fist. 

"It won't I promise. You are one of my favourite people too. Impossible to ignore you really." Zayn steps closer, arms going around Niall's waist. 

"Yeah?" He leans down until their noses are touching. Niall swollows, his heart starting to beat faster sending his blood rushing around his body making him feel warm and fuzzy. 

"Yeah." There is the lightest touch to Niall's lips but it's enough to make him gasp and lean into Zayn more, his hands uncurling and cupping the back of Zayn's head. Zayn looks at him for a bit, waiting to see if Niall will push him away. When he is sure Niall is happy, and Niall is sure that yes he can do this Zayn moves again and closes the gap between them.

It's not like kissing Harry. Niall never thought it would be. Buts it soft and warm and still feels a little bit like home. It makes Niall tingle and it has him holding onto Zayn a little tighter as their lips move together, tasting and exploring. It takes a few seconds for Niall to even work out how to kiss Zayn, because he knows exactly what to do when it comes to Harry. They find a rhythm though and then it gets deeper, harder more desperate. Zayn lick across Niall's bottom lip, bites down on it gentle then Niall is opening up for him letting him lick in and taste him. 

He taste like smoke, like late night conversations. Whispered secrets and soft giggles. There is another taste too, something new and intimate that has Niall's toes curling and his hand clawing at Zayn's top wanting more and closer and faster. 

Zayn pulls back long enough to take his top of, his breath coming out hard and shaky before he pulls Niall's head towards him lips crashing together. 

They tumble back onto the bed, Niall on his back with his legs parting to let Zayn in both groaning into the kiss when their crotches touch. 

Zayn pulls away from the kiss to start moving down Niall's neck, hands tugging up the bottom of his top until it's bunched under his armpit. 

"You still ok?" Niall nods, gripping onto Zayn's hair and tugging slightly on the short strands.   
"Yeah all good." Niall voice is shaking, heavy with how turned on he is getting from having Zayn this way. 

His top is pulled off and Zayn is kissing down his chest, fingers working on the button of his jeans.   
Niall can see the muscles in Zayn back as he goes lower and lower. His caramel skin making his own milky white look even paler. He thinks they actually look good together, skin to skin.   
"Oh god." Zayn's tounge pushes under the waist band of his jeans before he yanks them down a little to start kissing around the sensitive skin. 

Niall grips onto the bedsheets eyes flicking over to the door.   
When was Harry going to get up here? 

"How long.. holy Jesus...how long are they gonna be?" Zayn lifts his head up, Niall's jeans now halfway down his legs, his boxers only just covering his semi.   
"Not to long. He is just giving me time to get you all naked and ready." Zayn waggles his eyebrows, which is ridiculous when his face is right near his dick. God he is so casual about this. 

How did Matt even find out he like watching Zayn do this? Or did Zayn find out he liked being watched first. Maybe he should ask when his dick is not about to be on show for one of his mates. 

"You're over thinking."   
"I'm not. I just realised you're about to see my dick is all." Zayn crawls back up Niall's body until he is hovering above his head, hand either side of him pressing into the mattress.   
"We are both about to see a lot of dick. Which just sounds like an awful lot of fun to me." Niall rolls his eyes, shifting his hips. He was getting uncomfortably hard now. 

"Right so what's next?" Zayn moves back down again hooking his fingers into Niall's boxers and after looking up at Niall he pulls then down to join his jeans. 

Niall looks up at the ceiling. This could possibly be the most naked he has ever felt. He waits until Zayn has removed his clothes completly before looking back down again. Zayn is looking straight down at his cock, lip pulled in between his teeth.   
"What's next Zayn?" Zayn shakes his head, blinking a few times before smiling.   
"Sorry. Umm I am going to get you opened up if that's ok?" Ok. Yeah, ok he can totally deal with Zayn's fingering him. Obviously that would be apart of doing this. Someone's fingers had to go in him at some point.   
"Alright then. Cool." Zayn laughs reaching over Niall to open the draw by the bed. When he settles back down again he has a bottle of lube in his hand and starts to wiggle out of his own jeans.   
"You normally bottom right?"  
"Why would you say that?" Zayn raises his eyebrow shotting a look.  
"Because I have eyes. Plus you were like ten when you and Harry started fucking, that would have been weird if you topped." Niall raised his foot to kick Zayn on the side of the head.   
"Dickhead. I was sixteen, and I top sometimes I have you know. But yes I prefer to bottom so I am perfectly fine with fingers in me arse. If that's what you were wondering." Zayn pops the bottle open squeezing some lube onto his fingers. 

"Yes if was. Legs." Niall parts his legs again letting out a huff as he wiggle's down the bed a little. Zayn moved so he was laying beside Niall, his top half raised over him. Niall laid his head back looking straight into Zayn's eyes finding it oddly calming.   
"You ready?" Niall nodded, watching the movement of Zayn's throat as he swollowed.   
"Ok. Can't believe I'm about to have my fingers inside you." Niall laughs reaching up to tug Zayn's face closer to his.  
"Not how I thought my day would end when I got up this morning." Zayn hummed in agreement before connecting their lips. They kissed lazily for a few seconds before Niall felt the prod of Zayn finger against his hole. He breathed in, deepening the kiss his hands digging into Zayn's shoulders as he pushed the first finger in.   
"Oh..oh god." Niall closed his eyes letting the feel of Zayn's finger dragging inside him take over. 

Zayn pushes his tounge past his lips at the same time as pulling his finger out and adding another. Nialls legs fall apart more his hips raising slightly. He moaned loudly, the heels of his feet digging into the bed and his head turning to the side breaking the kiss.   
"You ok?"  
"Yes! Yes fuck, please stop asking if I'm ok. Feels so good, another. Please." Zayn pushes a third finger into Niall, leaning up a little so he can look down at him better.   
"You look...I didn't think." He stops, shakes his head then falls down to kiss Niall again moaning when Niall does. 

He starts fucking his fingers into him faster, flicking his wrist up when he pushes in then stretching them as he moves back. 

This is how Matt and Harry find them. Tangled up together, naked and moaning Zayn's fingers working quickly inside Niall. 

Harry makes his way to the bed straight away, leaning around Zayn and grabbing his hair to yank his head away from Niall. 

Niall gasps, eyes wide and almost completely black as he looks up at Harry who shoots him a smirk, dimples popping before he turns Zayn's head towards him and kisses him.

Niall moans loudly eyes glued to where their lips are moving together. Zayn's finger still as he kisses Harry back eagerly making Niall whine and roll his hips doing the work for him. 

He is more then ready, is open enough to take any of them but this feels good. Watching Harry and Zayn kiss while he fucks himself down on Zayn's fingers, Matt moving around them slowing taking off his clothes and just watching. 

Harry breaks the kiss, Zayn's bottom lip between his teeth and Zayn whimpers. Actually whimpers when Harry releases it and it has Niall's cock twitching and leaking on his stomach. 

Harry wraps his hand around Zayn's wrist and pulls, sliding Zayn fingers out from Niall slowly knowing he will enjoy the drag of it. 

Niall turns his face into the pillow, arousal burning in his stomach making him pant and gasp. 

Harry stands up from the bed to remove his clothes, Matt coming up behind him to help and place small kiss on his exposed skin. Zayn is sitting back on his knees eyes flicking between Niall and Harry his tounge darting out to lick at his lips. 

When Harry gets back on the bed, naked and hard, Zayn reaches for him straight away hand curling around his cock and slowly tugging it once. Harry judders, lips parting in a silent moan as he grabs the lube by Niall's waist. Zayn takes it from him letting go off his cock to squirt some into his hand before grabbing Harry again to spread it over his cock. 

Harry moans, his own hand wrapping around Zayn's to get him to squeeze harder. Zayn let's out a shaky breath and a quite 'fuck' his hand speeding up. 

It's so much just laying there open and ready and seeing Zayn's hand working over Harry's getting Harry ready to be inside him. 

"Come on. Come on already." Zayn chuckles releasing Harry and sliding to the edge of the bed. 

"Getting desperate there Ni?" Niall grones and is about to snap back when Harry grabs his legs and yanks him down to the end of the bed until his legs are dangling off, feet on the floor. Zayn moves to lay above Niall's head, hand curling into his hair. Harry stands between Niall's legs, bending with his right knee pressing into the mattress and lifts Niall hips up. Matt slides a pillow under Niall's butt before sitting down next to him. 

He can hear the slick sound of Zayn and Matt kissing above his head and then Harry is finally pushing into him. 

Niall moans head falling back and his hands grabbing for anything to hold on to which turns out to be Matt's leg and Zayn's hand. Harry stills once he is fully in, hips pushing into Niall as he lets out a small grunt and adjusts himself until he can comfortably hold himself up. 

Once he is ready he pulls out until only the head is inside Niall then he slams back in sending Niall's body jolting up the bed a little. 

Zayn moves to his side kissing him as Harry keeps up a steady pace, fucking into him hard. Niall barely kisses Zayn back, just moans into his mouth and licks up past his lips to get a taste of him. 

He can feels Matt's hand all over him, sliding down to his lower stomach before dragging back up to play with his nipple's making him shiver and gasp. 

It's an awful lot to feel at once. Harry inside him while Zayn kisses him and Matt is just everywhere else. 

"Can I taste him?" He pulls back from Zayn's kiss at the sound of Matt's voice. He is talking to Harry, asking Harry permission and that almost has Niall spilling over his stomach.

"Yeah, fuck yeah." Matt moves down the bed a little and takes Niall's cock into his mouth.   
"Uhh shit." Niall grabs the back of Zayn's head smashing their lips back together. 

Matt takes him all the way down until his cock is nudging the back of his throat and then he slowly lifts back up tounge swirling to taste every inch of him. 

"Oh god." Niall head drops back down, eyes screwed shut as he lets everything wash over him. The drag of Harry cock and the wet warm heat of Matts mouth at the same time.

"I'm getting close. Holy fuck yeah, its so much. Gonna come." He doesn't want to come yet, and he knows Harry does not want him to either. He can tell by the way he is fucking him, purposefully avoiding hitting his prostate. 

Matt removes his mouth from Niall so he can grip the base of his cock and squeeze hard, stopping Niall from being able to come. 

"Us first yeah?" He leans over to kiss up Niall's neck, nibbling on his jawline a little.   
"We are going to use you and we get to come first. Then it's your turn if you have been a good boy." Harry moans loudly, cursing as his hips still and he spills into Niall. He fucks into him gently a couple more times before letting out a quite sigh and pulling out. 

"Matt you next." Matt and Harry swap places, Harry tucking himself right into Niall side and tucking his arm under Niall head.  
"You good baby?" Niall nods, turning his face into Harry chest nosing at the slightly damp skin before kissing it.   
"Love you."   
"Love you too." 

Matt moves Niall's legs a little, placing one of his feet onto the bed to change the angle.   
"Zayn make sure he doesn't come." Zayn nods and takes Niall's cock in his hand gripping it like Matt had.   
"I could still come." Zayn lip quirks then he closes his hand around Niall even tighter making him hiss out and push into Harry more.   
"Ok fuck, I won't." Zayn nods then turns back to Matt, Harry chuckling into Niall's hair. 

When Matt pushes in it feels so different to Harry that Niall jolts away from him at first, like his body doesn't want to accept anyone that is not Harry. Matt grips on to his waist to hold him and Harry pushes down on his shoulder. 

Harry is thicker, makes him feel more full but Matt is longer and manages to hit Niall prostate as soon as he pushes in. Nialls crys out, cock leaking in Zayn's hand as his body tenses up.   
"Fuck! Oh fucking hell Matt. Shit." Matt bends down to kiss across Niall chest before moving to kiss Zayn. 

His moves his hips slowly, only just brushing against Niall spot so it's not enough to make him want to come but it's enough to tease him and have him trashing and bending about on the bed. 

Harry is all over him. Kissing his face and running his finger in his hair before traveling over every part of his body he can reach. His hand trails down to his arse a couple of times feeling where Matt is sliding into him. His pushes a finger in just slightly next to Matt's cock and it makes Niall black out for a second so that it's all stars and white noise and so much pressure. 

He gets close a few times, turning into a moaning sobbing mess, swatting at Zayn's hand to try and get him to let go or to move. Anything to let him come. 

He is only just aware of Matt coming inside him and then he is empty again. 

His foot falls back to the floor with a thud and before he gets a chance to relax his body Harry is grabbing him and moving him so his head is now at the end of the bed, hanging down slightly. 

"You still ok Niall?" It's Zayn asking him, as he gets himself comfortable between Niall's legs, kneeling.   
"Yeah. Wanna come." Zayn hooks Niall's legs over his shoulder, hands smoothing down his legs before gripping his waist.  
"Soon." He leans forward slightly and Niall lifts his head to see him. 

"Your turn?" Zayn smiles and it's so soft that a warmth spreads in Niall's chest and he finds himself reaching out to touch Zayn's face without really knowing he was doing it.   
"Yeah my turn." Zayn turns his head to the side to kiss the palm of Niall's hand.   
"Want you to kiss me." Zayn nods, a look flicking over his face before he goes back to normal leaning down so he can kiss Niall.   
It's slow and sweet and then Zayn is pushing into him, both of them gasping at the feel. 

Niall is so wet now and he can hear it as Zayn goes deeper, some of Harry and Matt's come being pushed out. Niall has no way to know who it belongs to and it's so much hotter then Niall thought it would be. 

"You feel good. So good around me Niall. Can't wait to fill you up even more." Niall kisses the corner of Zayn mouth, holding his lips there as they rock together. 

"Need you to tilt your head back babes. Think Harry can come again." Niall does as he is asked, head falling off the edge of the bed and mouth falling open straight away. Harry smiles down at him, running his thumb under Niall's chin before sliding between Niall's lips. 

Zayn's hand is resting across the column of his throat which is just, fuck. It's so fucking good.   
Each of Zayn thrust have Harry's cock sliding deeper into his mouth until he is hitting the back of Niall throat and he is having to swollow and open all at once making him gag and splutter until he is used to it. 

He must look obsence. Spread out on the bed. Legs over Zayn's shoulders, back arching off the bed and head thrown back as he takes both of them. 

"Not gonna last, so fucking tight." Zayn's head drops and his movements speed up turning more erratic as he get closer. 

Niall places his hand flat on Harry stomach breathing heavily out of his nose trying his hardest to take them both. 

Harry goes first coming down Niall throat. Nialls swollows it all, choking a little his chest convulsing with the effort of taking it all. The sights sends Zayn over and he slams into Niall one more time and comes, crying out Niall's name. 

Harry steps back stroking across Niall's face as he gasp for air. Zayn stays inside him bending over to take Niall into his mouth. 

"Now it's your turn." Niall looks over at Matt and then with a sob starts coming. Zayn's hold on him tightens to a painful grip that has him shooting into his mouth even more, some of it spilling out from Zayn's mouth and dripping down his chin.  
"Oh fuck." His eyes roll and his body sags into the bed as Zayn works his tounge over his cock to lick up every drop. 

Once he is done he pulls of with a wet pop a satifised smile on his face.   
They start talking but Niall can't take in what they are saying. He feel floppy and so, so tired and his lower back is starting to ache already but he feel so good. 

Harry moves him again tucking him up by the pillows and tugging the duvet out from underneath him so he can lay it over him. 

Nialls eyes flutter open and closed as the others move around the room talking softly making Niall feel more relaxed. 

Eventually Harry climbs into the bed, tucking into Niall's front and wrapping his arms around his waist. Zayn slides in behind him and Niall thinks he might be holding Harry's hand, and then Matt gets in behind Zayn. 

Niall let's out a small giggle. Because he actually just got fucked by three people in one night.   
"You happy Harry?" Harry hums kissing Niall's nose.  
"Always happy when I'm with you. Love you sweet boy."   
"Love you too. Love you guys." Niall yawns eyes slipping closed again.  
"Love you Ni."   
"Love you Irish." Naill smiles drifting off to sleep and hopes to god he can laugh about this in the morning. 

Xxxx

When Niall wakes up in the morning the other three are still asleep and wrapped around him.  
He feels hot, sticky and sore. He kind of loves it. 

He has to wiggle down under the duvet and slide off the end of the bed to get out without disturbing the others. 

He looks back tempted to find his phone and take a photo of the three snuggled up in bed. But knowing his luck Liam or River will find it and nobody needs that to happen. 

He pulls on his clothes from yesterday wincing at the wetness still in his arse before leaving the room.  
Drink, food then shower. 

He plods through the house, bare feet slapping on the floor as he goes into the kitchen and straight to the kettle to fill it with water and flick it on. 

He goes into the cereal cupboard already knowing he is going to be stealing some of Rae's cereal. Not that she would mind, Niall is her favourite person after all. 

Niall has his hand around the box when he hears footsteps behind him. 

"Oh hey." Niall smiles over his shoulder at Harry, hand still clutching the box of Rae's cereal. "I was just gonna have some food then wake ya." Harry doesn't reply so Niall drops his hand from the boxs and turns towards him. 

Was he regretting last night? What was he going to do if he did? Would they be ok? 

Harry grabs Niall's waist pulling him harshly away from the counter before spinning him around and shoving him forward into the wall beside the fridge. 

"Harry." Niall gasps, Harry yanks his jeans down just enough to expose his arse before shoving two fingers into Niall's mouth. Nialls head tips back his lips stretching around the digets as Harry slowly pushes them into his mouth until Niall is gasping and gagging around them. He holds them there for a second forcing Niall to work his throat around them, spit already gathering in his mouth. His cock is hardening in his jeans already, his pulse quickening. Harry finally drags his fingers out, pinching at Niall's bottom lip harshly before realising it. 

"You are mine." Harry knocks Niall's hips towards him so Niall's lower back is arched and pushes two fingers into him. Niall cries out, eyes screwing shut at the sudden intrusion.   
"Still so open and wet from letting everyone fuck you." Niall drops his head forward, the wall cold against his skin. Harry removed his fingers again, using his clean hand do grab a fistful of Niall's hair and yank his head back.   
"Look baby." He holds his fingers up in front of Niall. "Look how messy my fingers are already. Don't even know who's come it is do you? Spent all night with all our come dripping out of you like some slut"   
"Oh god." Niall feels so turned on it's almost overwhelming. His knees are shaking with the effort to stay standing for Harry, his cock so hard it was starting to hurt where it was pushing into the thick material if his jeans. 

Harry pushes himself flat against Niall's back pressing Niall into the wall more. The pressure against Niall cock has him juddering and letting out a breathy little moan. The metal from Harry's jeans is rubbing against the skin of his arse and god he just wants Harry to fuck him, or something. Anything.   
"Harry please."  
"Please what? Please fuck you? Please make you come?" Niall nods turning his head to the side to see Harry.  
"Do you deserve it?" He grabs Niall's chin shoving his face back to look at the wall.   
"Letting them fuck you. Letting then use you. Did you enjoy it? Matt and Zayn being inside you? Their come filling you up?" Flashes from last night go through Niall's head. Zayn's hand and lips. Matt pushing into him, how they tasted.  
"Of course you did. Like a proper little whore." Harry moves back, his hand wrapping around the back of Niall's neck and squeezing hard enough to have Niall go slack. His other hand was working on the button and zip of his jeans quickly pulling then down to his knees.   
Niall tries to calm his breathing, is only just aware of how erratic it actually is. His head has gone fuzzy and everything is just a jumble of Harry and how badly he needs to get off right now. 

"Going to treat you like the whore you seem to love being so much." Harry pushes into Niall in one go, hips slamming into the flesh of his arse. Nialls cry is loud enough that Harry thinks it could wake Matt and Zayn, which good. Let them hear how good he fucks his boy. 

He grabs both of Niall's wrist in one hand holding them above his head and pressing then into the wall, his other hand gripping at his waist to keep his arse arched out for him as he starts to pound into Niall as hard as he can. 

Niall moans come out chocked, the first moan mixing in with the second until it's just a mess of sounds that have Harry almost coming then and there. Harry didn't let up, keeps slamming into Niall and it's so fucking good. Almost too good and also like torture because his dick is still trapped in his jeans and he just needs it out and he needs to get his hand on it.   
"Harry, please I need.."  
"Need what? Need more? Want me to get your cock out baby? Want me to make you come?" Niall nods, hands straining in Harry grip. His head falls back onto Harry shoulders but then Harry is grabbing the back of his neck again, fingers digging in as he pushes Niall head back up.   
He manages to keep the pace going, Niall's body jolting harshly each time Harry fucks into him.   
"You're being so good. Taking me so well, so open and wet from them that you didn't even need me to get you ready. Not sure you have been good enough for me to let you come though." Niall grones, tugging his hands again, his hips bucking.  
"Think your cock should stay exactly where it is." Niall pushes back against Harry and he is not even sure what he is trying to do. Get fucked harder so maybe he could come or get Harry off him so he can do it himself.   
Harry responds by pushing back twice as hard, stopping all his movements as he slams Niall back into the wall pressing him forward until he is standing poker straight. 

Harry moans, kissing at the back off Nialls neck almost coming with how tight Niall feels around him stood like this. 

"Move. Fucking move." Niall tried to stick his arse out again to feel the drag of Harrys cock inside him but Harry is stronger and Niall barely moves at all. This is worse. Having Harry inside him but not moving is so much worse then when he was fucking him hard and not letting him get anywhere near coming. 

"Say you're mine. Only mine." Niall swollows, he wants to kiss Harry. Turn around in his arms and kiss his softly while telling him that he really is only his. 

"I'm yours. Belong to you and only you, I only ever want you. Love you Harry, love you so much please." Harry's hand moves up Niall's top, feeling the soft skin of his stomach, the small bump of his nipple and the hardnest to his chest before coming out of the collar to wrap around his neck. He grips until he hears Niall gasp, struggle for breath like he knows he likes then he starts to fuck him again. 

Nialls moans are barely there, just small little gasp that manage to get out around Harry's hand gripping as his throat. The sound of skin slapping on skin is louder now that Niall's moans have been practically silenced and it has shivers going up Harry's spine. He looks down, can see himself disappearing into Niall's tight hole. He moans pressing more kisses into Niall's neck as his stomach starts to tighten. The warmth spreads up from his balls to his chest and he has just enough time to release Niall's neck to quickly move down to gently release his cock.   
"Oh god, oh fuck yes Harry." Harry grips him hard, pumping his cock fast his movements becoming sloppy as he get closer to coming.  
"I'm coming. I'm coming." Harry feels Niall's whole body tense and curl into him, his arse squeezing around his cock. He lets go on Niall's wrist and he keeps then there raised above his head like he has not even notched Harry's grip leave and it has another wave of warmth rush over him. He cups his hand in front of Niall's cock just in time to catch his come. It spills over his fist and hits his hand for what feels like ages. Niall is now flopping against him, arms falling down to his side as he comes and comes.   
"So good. So fucking good. Shit yeah." Harry starts coming, body jolting as he spills inside Niall pressing as close to him as he can not caring that he is getting his come covered hands all over him.   
"Fuck." He keeps moving slowly, waiting for his high to finish a few more spurts of come leaving him.   
He stops with a grunt, now so aware of how sweaty both him and Niall are making their skin tacky and their clothes cling to them. Harry stomach muscles are burning and when he looks down he can see the skin around Niall arse already turning read from where his hips had been slamming into him. They look a mess, but Niall looks so fucked out Harry really could not care less. 

He pulls out of Niall gentle, thumb rubbing in soothing circles when Niall let's out a whine at the feeling. 

"Woah" They both turn their heads towards the doorway where Zayn and Matt are both standing.   
"They was fucking hot." Harry grones pulling his and Niall's trousers back up. He pulls Niall away from the wall holding him to his chest. 

"Well I'm glad you enjoyed. We are going to take a shower now." Niall holds tightly onto Harry, legs like jelly as they go upstairs and into the bathroom. 

Harry undresses him before removing his own clothes then leans around Niall to turn the shower on.   
"You ok?" Niall nods. He is dazed, head still fuzzy and he feel like he is outside of his body watching as Harry kisses around his face and smooths his hand over his hair.   
"Yeah. Love you. Really, really love you." Harry smiles pressing a small soft kiss to Niall's lips.   
"I love you too baby. A ridiculous amount." Niall giggles poking at Harry's stomach before letting himself be lead into the shower so Harry can wash them both down. 

"In all seriousness did you enjoy last night?" Harry asks while lathering shampoo in Niall's hair, making sure to keep skin to skin contact with him.   
"Yeah I did. Did you? You don't regret it?"   
"No. I had fun. Was hot seeing you like that. Don't think I need to do it again mind. Feel a bit possessive now." Niall laughs leaning his head back to rise of the shampoo.   
"Really I didn't notice. But same, we don't need to do it again. Just you and me from now on for like forever." Harry brings Niall's head back to kiss him.  
"Forever. That sounds nice." Niall nuzzles into Harry's neck enjoying the warmth of him and the water washing over them.  
"Forever." 

 

"Twister? You do realise I am halfway through my thirties right? Which is really depressing to say. We are not playing twister. Rethink while I go take a piss." Harry throws the twister box back on the table before leaving the room. 

Niall turns to Zayn, eyebrow raised and a laugh bubbling in his chest. 

"Twister? Really. That's the Zayn Malik move. I thought you said it was hot watching him Matt, not hilarious." Zayn raises his middle finger in the air snatching the box off the table and holding it to his chest. 

"I was not making a move dickhead. I just wanted to play." 

"Yeah we believe you." Matt patted Zayn on the head.  
"Screw you guys, I was not flirting. I haven't started yet. You will know when I start."

"How? You gonna get Connect Four out? Uno? Oh please get Uno that really gets me going." 

"I bet it does you freak. Bet you and Harry have the hottest sex after a round of old age pensioner games." 

"Yes because my boyfriend is really a pensioner right. Sorry I will trade him in for a twink." Matt looks up a mix between offended and amusement on his face. Zayn scoffs dropping the box back down.

"My husband is not a twink."

"I know, I was talking about you." Zayn's eyes narrowed and he takes a few steps towards Niall.

"Me? You calling me a twink?" Niall giggles taking a few of his own steps until he hits the table.   
"Yeah I am. If the boot fits and all that."  
"Oh the boots fits. Fits up your arse." Zayn leaps over the table with a cry knocking over board games as he lunges for Niall. Niall let's out a girly scream as they both tumble to the floor. 

They roll around on the floor fighting to get on top of each other pinching and tickling at whatever piece of body they can get to. 

"Alright children." Matt gets up trying to interfere, Zayn letting out a loud cackle when Niall finally gets his finger into his side's.   
"Playtime is over. You are going to break something you arseholes." Zayn gets his leg hooked over Niall's waist and flips them over so he is straddling Niall and starts trying to pin Niall's hands under his knees. 

"Say I'm not a twink."  
"Never!" Zayn finally gets Niall's hands under his knees and starts tickling his stomach. Niall screams head flying back into the floor with a thud.   
"No! Nooooo! I'm gonna puke!"  
"Zayn if he pukes on my carpet I swear to god I will kill you both!"   
"Say I'm not a twink bitch!" Niall shakes his head from side to side, laughing too much to talk. Zayn digs his fingers in harder, Niall stomach tensing and his legs kicking about to try and unbalanced Zayn.   
He finally manages to splutter out a 'twink' around his laughter and thinks he actually might be about to throw up when Zayn finally stops, wiggling up his body more.   
"Oh you're in for it." Zayn points out his fingers and start jabbing Niall on the forehead.  
"Ouch! Fuck off you annoying twink!"   
"Oh I'm annoying am I? Funny that I'm such an annoying twink when you want me to fuck you and your boyfriend." 

"Wants you to what?" Zayn stops poking at Niall and slowly turns to face Harry who has walked back into the room. 

"Well hi, you are back." Harry frowns looking from Niall to Zayn to Matt then make to Niall again. 

"I only went for a wee. Who's fucking who?" Matt let's out a loud sigh pushing Zayn off Niall.

"Niall wants me and Zayn to join you and him for some fun. Of the sexual kind. Zayn was going to seduce you but now you know so guess he does not have too." Harry frown deepens, arms coming up to cross over his chest. 

"Zayn would not be able to seduce me, just so you know. You want this Ni? Like for real? Us four?" Niall gets up, straightening out his top. 

"Well yeah if you do? Just thought it was something new to try. But I don't care if you don't want to. Just a suggestion." Harry looks at Niall for a while, a look on his face that Niall can't quite work out. 

Oh god. What if Harry just thinks Niall wants to do this just to fuck Matt and Zayn. Want if he was about to lose his shit? 

"And you two, you would be alright with this?" 

"Yeah sure, me and Matt do stuff like this sometimes. It's fun." Harry walks over to Niall hooking his arms around his waist. 

"And how does it normally go?" The room stays quite for a while, the atmosphere around them all suddenly feeling thick and heavy. Eventually Matt clears his throat to answer Harry. 

"Well normally we go out and I will pick someone for Zayn. He will get them to agree to come home with us. Then when we get home he will go upstairs with them and get started and I will go into the room after a few minutes. I either just watch or join in." Harry doesn't take his eyes away from Niall the whole time Matt talks and Niall still can't work out what Harry could be thinking. 

Should he try and play this off as a joke? He has no idea if Harry was about to to along with this or say they are all ridiculous. 

"Well then." Niall watches Harry as he thinks about it? Comes to terms with his boyfriend being a freak? Who knows. His grip on Niall's waist tightens before he lets go completely stepping back.   
"Why don't you take him upstairs then Z? Get him started for us?" Holy shit. Holy bloody shit. They where actually going to do this. 

"Shit really? Yeah. Fuck. I can do that." 

"Don't say yes to this just because you think I want it." Harry smiles, crowding back into Niall's space to kiss him softly. 

"I wouldn't baby. I want this too yeah. Think it would be hot. And I don't think it will be weird after. Just this once though right? Don't want to keep sharing you." Niall shakes his head reaching up to tangle his fingers into Harry hair. 

"Just once, for fun. Never have to share me ever again. All yours." 

"Good. Go with Zayn then, that's a good boy." Niall practically melts at that and god yeah, he does want to be a good boy for him. For them all. 

Zayn takes his hand tugging him towards the stairs. Niall hears Matt ask Harry to go into the kitchen with him then he is being yanked up the stairs and lead down the hallway to Matt and Zayn's room.

Niall has actually never been inside Zayn and Matt's room and he never thought the first time being in here would be to have sex with them. That should be wierd, but it's not, it so should be. 

Zayn crosses the room to close the curtains while Niall looks around. The walls are painted a light shade of purple, Zayn's art framed and hung all over the place. The bed is in the middle of the room, large with thick cream coloured bed sheets. It was obvious, to Niall at least, that Matt had decorated this room. It was nice, and he was about to have sex in it. Jesus. 

"Hey you good?" Niall turns back to Zayn putting a smile on his face. He was good, nervous. Definitely nervous. He had no idea how this kind of thing worked but he trusted Matt and Zayn to know what they were doing and to make him feel comfortable through the whole thing.

"Yeah. Just this is happening. Thought it would take a bit longer, thought Harry would need more time to agree to it and stuff." Zayn takes one of Niall's hands pulling him closer the other hand resting on his waist the tips of his fingers tucking under his top to rest against his skin. 

"I think Harry is pretty open minded about most things, I knew it wouldn't take much. You certain about this though? I don't want you to regret it and have it mess with your relationship with Harry. Or our friendship, you are one of my favourite people so don't go all funny and start ignoring me." Niall huffs out a laugh sliding his hands up around Zayn's neck. He notices his hands are shaking so he curls them into fist. 

"It won't I promise. You are one of my favourite people too. Impossible to ignore you really." Zayn steps closer, arms going around Niall's waist. 

"Yeah?" He leans down until their noses are touching. Niall swollows, his heart starting to beat faster sending his blood rushing around his body making him feel warm and fuzzy. 

"Yeah." There is the lightest touch to Niall's lips but it's enough to make him gasp and lean into Zayn more, his hands uncurling and cupping the back of Zayn's head. Zayn looks at him for a bit, waiting to see if Niall will push him away. When he is sure Niall is happy, and Niall is sure that yes he can do this Zayn moves again and closes the gap between them.

It's not like kissing Harry. Niall never thought it would be. Buts it soft and warm and still feels a little bit like home. It makes Niall tingle and it has him holding onto Zayn a little tighter as their lips move together, tasting and exploring. It takes a few seconds for Niall to even work out how to kiss Zayn, because he knows exactly what to do when it comes to Harry. They find a rhythm though and then it gets deeper, harder more desperate. Zayn lick across Niall's bottom lip, bites down on it gentle then Niall is opening up for him letting him lick in and taste him. 

He taste like smoke, like late night conversations. Whispered secrets and soft giggles. There is another taste too, something new and intimate that has Niall's toes curling and his hand clawing at Zayn's top wanting more and closer and faster. 

Zayn pulls back long enough to take his top of, his breath coming out hard and shaky before he pulls Niall's head towards him lips crashing together. 

They tumble back onto the bed, Niall on his back with his legs parting to let Zayn in both groaning into the kiss when their crotches touch. 

Zayn pulls away from the kiss to start moving down Niall's neck, hands tugging up the bottom of his top until it's bunched under his armpit. 

"You still ok?" Niall nods, gripping onto Zayn's hair and tugging slightly on the short strands.   
"Yeah all good." Niall voice is shaking, heavy with how turned on he is getting from having Zayn this way. 

His top is pulled off and Zayn is kissing down his chest, fingers working on the button of his jeans.   
Niall can see the muscles in Zayn back as he goes lower and lower. His caramel skin making his own milky white look even paler. He thinks they actually look good together, skin to skin.   
"Oh god." Zayn's tounge pushes under the waist band of his jeans before he yanks them down a little to start kissing around the sensitive skin. 

Niall grips onto the bedsheets eyes flicking over to the door.   
When was Harry going to get up here? 

"How long.. holy Jesus...how long are they gonna be?" Zayn lifts his head up, Niall's jeans now halfway down his legs, his boxers only just covering his semi.   
"Not to long. He is just giving me time to get you all naked and ready." Zayn waggles his eyebrows, which is ridiculous when his face is right near his dick. God he is so casual about this. 

How did Matt even find out he like watching Zayn do this? Or did Zayn find out he liked being watched first. Maybe he should ask when his dick is not about to be on show for one of his mates. 

"You're over thinking."   
"I'm not. I just realised you're about to see my dick is all." Zayn crawls back up Niall's body until he is hovering above his head, hand either side of him pressing into the mattress.   
"We are both about to see a lot of dick. Which just sounds like an awful lot of fun to me." Niall rolls his eyes, shifting his hips. He was getting uncomfortably hard now. 

"Right so what's next?" Zayn moves back down again hooking his fingers into Niall's boxers and after looking up at Niall he pulls then down to join his jeans. 

Niall looks up at the ceiling. This could possibly be the most naked he has ever felt. He waits until Zayn has removed his clothes completly before looking back down again. Zayn is looking straight down at his cock, lip pulled in between his teeth.   
"What's next Zayn?" Zayn shakes his head, blinking a few times before smiling.   
"Sorry. Umm I am going to get you opened up if that's ok?" Ok. Yeah, ok he can totally deal with Zayn's fingering him. Obviously that would be apart of doing this. Someone's fingers had to go in him at some point.   
"Alright then. Cool." Zayn laughs reaching over Niall to open the draw by the bed. When he settles back down again he has a bottle of lube in his hand and starts to wiggle out of his own jeans.   
"You normally bottom right?"  
"Why would you say that?" Zayn raises his eyebrow shotting a look.  
"Because I have eyes. Plus you were like ten when you and Harry started fucking, that would have been weird if you topped." Niall raised his foot to kick Zayn on the side of the head.   
"Dickhead. I was sixteen, and I top sometimes I have you know. But yes I prefer to bottom so I am perfectly fine with fingers in me arse. If that's what you were wondering." Zayn pops the bottle open squeezing some lube onto his fingers. 

"Yes if was. Legs." Niall parts his legs again letting out a huff as he wiggle's down the bed a little. Zayn moved so he was laying beside Niall, his top half raised over him. Niall laid his head back looking straight into Zayn's eyes finding it oddly calming.   
"You ready?" Niall nodded, watching the movement of Zayn's throat as he swollowed.   
"Ok. Can't believe I'm about to have my fingers inside you." Niall laughs reaching up to tug Zayn's face closer to his.  
"Not how I thought my day would end when I got up this morning." Zayn hummed in agreement before connecting their lips. They kissed lazily for a few seconds before Niall felt the prod of Zayn finger against his hole. He breathed in, deepening the kiss his hands digging into Zayn's shoulders as he pushed the first finger in.   
"Oh..oh god." Niall closed his eyes letting the feel of Zayn's finger dragging inside him take over. 

Zayn pushes his tounge past his lips at the same time as pulling his finger out and adding another. Nialls legs fall apart more his hips raising slightly. He moaned loudly, the heels of his feet digging into the bed and his head turning to the side breaking the kiss.   
"You ok?"  
"Yes! Yes fuck, please stop asking if I'm ok. Feels so good, another. Please." Zayn pushes a third finger into Niall, leaning up a little so he can look down at him better.   
"You look...I didn't think." He stops, shakes his head then falls down to kiss Niall again moaning when Niall does. 

He starts fucking his fingers into him faster, flicking his wrist up when he pushes in then stretching them as he moves back. 

This is how Matt and Harry find them. Tangled up together, naked and moaning Zayn's fingers working quickly inside Niall. 

Harry makes his way to the bed straight away, leaning around Zayn and grabbing his hair to yank his head away from Niall. 

Niall gasps, eyes wide and almost completely black as he looks up at Harry who shoots him a smirk, dimples popping before he turns Zayn's head towards him and kisses him.

Niall moans loudly eyes glued to where their lips are moving together. Zayn's finger still as he kisses Harry back eagerly making Niall whine and roll his hips doing the work for him. 

He is more then ready, is open enough to take any of them but this feels good. Watching Harry and Zayn kiss while he fucks himself down on Zayn's fingers, Matt moving around them slowing taking off his clothes and just watching. 

Harry breaks the kiss, Zayn's bottom lip between his teeth and Zayn whimpers. Actually whimpers when Harry releases it and it has Niall's cock twitching and leaking on his stomach. 

Harry wraps his hand around Zayn's wrist and pulls, sliding Zayn fingers out from Niall slowly knowing he will enjoy the drag of it. 

Niall turns his face into the pillow, arousal burning in his stomach making him pant and gasp. 

Harry stands up from the bed to remove his clothes, Matt coming up behind him to help and place small kiss on his exposed skin. Zayn is sitting back on his knees eyes flicking between Niall and Harry his tounge darting out to lick at his lips. 

When Harry gets back on the bed, naked and hard, Zayn reaches for him straight away hand curling around his cock and slowly tugging it once. Harry judders, lips parting in a silent moan as he grabs the lube by Niall's waist. Zayn takes it from him letting go off his cock to squirt some into his hand before grabbing Harry again to spread it over his cock. 

Harry moans, his own hand wrapping around Zayn's to get him to squeeze harder. Zayn let's out a shaky breath and a quite 'fuck' his hand speeding up. 

It's so much just laying there open and ready and seeing Zayn's hand working over Harry's getting Harry ready to be inside him. 

"Come on. Come on already." Zayn chuckles releasing Harry and sliding to the edge of the bed. 

"Getting desperate there Ni?" Niall grones and is about to snap back when Harry grabs his legs and yanks him down to the end of the bed until his legs are dangling off, feet on the floor. Zayn moves to lay above Niall's head, hand curling into his hair. Harry stands between Niall's legs, bending with his right knee pressing into the mattress and lifts Niall hips up. Matt slides a pillow under Niall's butt before sitting down next to him. 

He can hear the slick sound of Zayn and Matt kissing above his head and then Harry is finally pushing into him. 

Niall moans head falling back and his hands grabbing for anything to hold on to which turns out to be Matt's leg and Zayn's hand. Harry stills once he is fully in, hips pushing into Niall as he lets out a small grunt and adjusts himself until he can comfortably hold himself up. 

Once he is ready he pulls out until only the head is inside Niall then he slams back in sending Niall's body jolting up the bed a little. 

Zayn moves to his side kissing him as Harry keeps up a steady pace, fucking into him hard. Niall barely kisses Zayn back, just moans into his mouth and licks up past his lips to get a taste of him. 

He can feels Matt's hand all over him, sliding down to his lower stomach before dragging back up to play with his nipple's making him shiver and gasp. 

It's an awful lot to feel at once. Harry inside him while Zayn kisses him and Matt is just everywhere else. 

"Can I taste him?" He pulls back from Zayn's kiss at the sound of Matt's voice. He is talking to Harry, asking Harry permission and that almost has Niall spilling over his stomach.

"Yeah, fuck yeah." Matt moves down the bed a little and takes Niall's cock into his mouth.   
"Uhh shit." Niall grabs the back of Zayn's head smashing their lips back together. 

Matt takes him all the way down until his cock is nudging the back of his throat and then he slowly lifts back up tounge swirling to taste every inch of him. 

"Oh god." Niall head drops back down, eyes screwed shut as he lets everything wash over him. The drag of Harry cock and the wet warm heat of Matts mouth at the same time.

"I'm getting close. Holy fuck yeah, its so much. Gonna come." He doesn't want to come yet, and he knows Harry does not want him to either. He can tell by the way he is fucking him, purposefully avoiding hitting his prostate. 

Matt removes his mouth from Niall so he can grip the base of his cock and squeeze hard, stopping Niall from being able to come. 

"Us first yeah?" He leans over to kiss up Niall's neck, nibbling on his jawline a little.   
"We are going to use you and we get to come first. Then it's your turn if you have been a good boy." Harry moans loudly, cursing as his hips still and he spills into Niall. He fucks into him gently a couple more times before letting out a quite sigh and pulling out. 

"Matt you next." Matt and Harry swap places, Harry tucking himself right into Niall side and tucking his arm under Niall head.  
"You good baby?" Niall nods, turning his face into Harry chest nosing at the slightly damp skin before kissing it.   
"Love you."   
"Love you too." 

Matt moves Niall's legs a little, placing one of his feet onto the bed to change the angle.   
"Zayn make sure he doesn't come." Zayn nods and takes Niall's cock in his hand gripping it like Matt had.   
"I could still come." Zayn lip quirks then he closes his hand around Niall even tighter making him hiss out and push into Harry more.   
"Ok fuck, I won't." Zayn nods then turns back to Matt, Harry chuckling into Niall's hair. 

When Matt pushes in it feels so different to Harry that Niall jolts away from him at first, like his body doesn't want to accept anyone that is not Harry. Matt grips on to his waist to hold him and Harry pushes down on his shoulder. 

Harry is thicker, makes him feel more full but Matt is longer and manages to hit Niall prostate as soon as he pushes in. Nialls crys out, cock leaking in Zayn's hand as his body tenses up.   
"Fuck! Oh fucking hell Matt. Shit." Matt bends down to kiss across Niall chest before moving to kiss Zayn. 

His moves his hips slowly, only just brushing against Niall spot so it's not enough to make him want to come but it's enough to tease him and have him trashing and bending about on the bed. 

Harry is all over him. Kissing his face and running his finger in his hair before traveling over every part of his body he can reach. His hand trails down to his arse a couple of times feeling where Matt is sliding into him. His pushes a finger in just slightly next to Matt's cock and it makes Niall black out for a second so that it's all stars and white noise and so much pressure. 

He gets close a few times, turning into a moaning sobbing mess, swatting at Zayn's hand to try and get him to let go or to move. Anything to let him come. 

He is only just aware of Matt coming inside him and then he is empty again. 

His foot falls back to the floor with a thud and before he gets a chance to relax his body Harry is grabbing him and moving him so his head is now at the end of the bed, hanging down slightly. 

"You still ok Niall?" It's Zayn asking him, as he gets himself comfortable between Niall's legs, kneeling.   
"Yeah. Wanna come." Zayn hooks Niall's legs over his shoulder, hands smoothing down his legs before gripping his waist.  
"Soon." He leans forward slightly and Niall lifts his head to see him. 

"Your turn?" Zayn smiles and it's so soft that a warmth spreads in Niall's chest and he finds himself reaching out to touch Zayn's face without really knowing he was doing it.   
"Yeah my turn." Zayn turns his head to the side to kiss the palm of Niall's hand.   
"Want you to kiss me." Zayn nods, a look flicking over his face before he goes back to normal leaning down so he can kiss Niall.   
It's slow and sweet and then Zayn is pushing into him, both of them gasping at the feel. 

Niall is so wet now and he can hear it as Zayn goes deeper, some of Harry and Matt's come being pushed out. Niall has no way to know who it belongs to and it's so much hotter then Niall thought it would be. 

"You feel good. So good around me Niall. Can't wait to fill you up even more." Niall kisses the corner of Zayn mouth, holding his lips there as they rock together. 

"Need you to tilt your head back babes. Think Harry can come again." Niall does as he is asked, head falling off the edge of the bed and mouth falling open straight away. Harry smiles down at him, running his thumb under Niall's chin before sliding between Niall's lips. 

Zayn's hand is resting across the column of his throat which is just, fuck. It's so fucking good.   
Each of Zayn thrust have Harry's cock sliding deeper into his mouth until he is hitting the back of Niall throat and he is having to swollow and open all at once making him gag and splutter until he is used to it. 

He must look obsence. Spread out on the bed. Legs over Zayn's shoulders, back arching off the bed and head thrown back as he takes both of them. 

"Not gonna last, so fucking tight." Zayn's head drops and his movements speed up turning more erratic as he get closer. 

Niall places his hand flat on Harry stomach breathing heavily out of his nose trying his hardest to take them both. 

Harry goes first coming down Niall throat. Nialls swollows it all, choking a little his chest convulsing with the effort of taking it all. The sights sends Zayn over and he slams into Niall one more time and comes, crying out Niall's name. 

Harry steps back stroking across Niall's face as he gasp for air. Zayn stays inside him bending over to take Niall into his mouth. 

"Now it's your turn." Niall looks over at Matt and then with a sob starts coming. Zayn's hold on him tightens to a painful grip that has him shooting into his mouth even more, some of it spilling out from Zayn's mouth and dripping down his chin.  
"Oh fuck." His eyes roll and his body sags into the bed as Zayn works his tounge over his cock to lick up every drop. 

Once he is done he pulls of with a wet pop a satifised smile on his face.   
They start talking but Niall can't take in what they are saying. He feel floppy and so, so tired and his lower back is starting to ache already but he feel so good. 

Harry moves him again tucking him up by the pillows and tugging the duvet out from underneath him so he can lay it over him. 

Nialls eyes flutter open and closed as the others move around the room talking softly making Niall feel more relaxed. 

Eventually Harry climbs into the bed, tucking into Niall's front and wrapping his arms around his waist. Zayn slides in behind him and Niall thinks he might be holding Harry's hand, and then Matt gets in behind Zayn. 

Niall let's out a small giggle. Because he actually just got fucked by three people in one night.   
"You happy Harry?" Harry hums kissing Niall's nose.  
"Always happy when I'm with you. Love you sweet boy."   
"Love you too. Love you guys." Niall yawns eyes slipping closed again.  
"Love you Ni."   
"Love you Irish." Naill smiles drifting off to sleep and hopes to god he can laugh about this in the morning. 

Xxxx

When Niall wakes up in the morning the other three are still asleep and wrapped around him.  
He feels hot, sticky and sore. He kind of loves it. 

He has to wiggle down under the duvet and slide off the end of the bed to get out without disturbing the others. 

He looks back tempted to find his phone and take a photo of the three snuggled up in bed. But knowing his luck Liam or River will find it and nobody needs that to happen. 

He pulls on his clothes from yesterday wincing at the wetness still in his arse before leaving the room.  
Drink, food then shower. 

He plods through the house, bare feet slapping on the floor as he goes into the kitchen and straight to the kettle to fill it with water and flick it on. 

He goes into the cereal cupboard already knowing he is going to be stealing some of Rae's cereal. Not that she would mind, Niall is her favourite person after all. 

Niall has his hand around the box when he hears footsteps behind him. 

"Oh hey." Niall smiles over his shoulder at Harry, hand still clutching the box of Rae's cereal. "I was just gonna have some food then wake ya." Harry doesn't reply so Niall drops his hand from the boxs and turns towards him. 

Was he regretting last night? What was he going to do if he did? Would they be ok? 

Harry grabs Niall's waist pulling him harshly away from the counter before spinning him around and shoving him forward into the wall beside the fridge. 

"Harry." Niall gasps, Harry yanks his jeans down just enough to expose his arse before shoving two fingers into Niall's mouth. Nialls head tips back his lips stretching around the digets as Harry slowly pushes them into his mouth until Niall is gasping and gagging around them. He holds them there for a second forcing Niall to work his throat around them, spit already gathering in his mouth. His cock is hardening in his jeans already, his pulse quickening. Harry finally drags his fingers out, pinching at Niall's bottom lip harshly before realising it. 

"You are mine." Harry knocks Niall's hips towards him so Niall's lower back is arched and pushes two fingers into him. Niall cries out, eyes screwing shut at the sudden intrusion.   
"Still so open and wet from letting everyone fuck you." Niall drops his head forward, the wall cold against his skin. Harry removed his fingers again, using his clean hand do grab a fistful of Niall's hair and yank his head back.   
"Look baby." He holds his fingers up in front of Niall. "Look how messy my fingers are already. Don't even know who's come it is do you? Spent all night with all our come dripping out of you like some slut"   
"Oh god." Niall feels so turned on it's almost overwhelming. His knees are shaking with the effort to stay standing for Harry, his cock so hard it was starting to hurt where it was pushing into the thick material if his jeans. 

Harry pushes himself flat against Niall's back pressing Niall into the wall more. The pressure against Niall cock has him juddering and letting out a breathy little moan. The metal from Harry's jeans is rubbing against the skin of his arse and god he just wants Harry to fuck him, or something. Anything.   
"Harry please."  
"Please what? Please fuck you? Please make you come?" Niall nods turning his head to the side to see Harry.  
"Do you deserve it?" He grabs Niall's chin shoving his face back to look at the wall.   
"Letting them fuck you. Letting then use you. Did you enjoy it? Matt and Zayn being inside you? Their come filling you up?" Flashes from last night go through Niall's head. Zayn's hand and lips. Matt pushing into him, how they tasted.  
"Of course you did. Like a proper little whore." Harry moves back, his hand wrapping around the back of Niall's neck and squeezing hard enough to have Niall go slack. His other hand was working on the button and zip of his jeans quickly pulling then down to his knees.   
Niall tries to calm his breathing, is only just aware of how erratic it actually is. His head has gone fuzzy and everything is just a jumble of Harry and how badly he needs to get off right now. 

"Going to treat you like the whore you seem to love being so much." Harry pushes into Niall in one go, hips slamming into the flesh of his arse. Nialls cry is loud enough that Harry thinks it could wake Matt and Zayn, which good. Let them hear how good he fucks his boy. 

He grabs both of Niall's wrist in one hand holding them above his head and pressing then into the wall, his other hand gripping at his waist to keep his arse arched out for him as he starts to pound into Niall as hard as he can. 

Niall moans come out chocked, the first moan mixing in with the second until it's just a mess of sounds that have Harry almost coming then and there. Harry didn't let up, keeps slamming into Niall and it's so fucking good. Almost too good and also like torture because his dick is still trapped in his jeans and he just needs it out and he needs to get his hand on it.   
"Harry, please I need.."  
"Need what? Need more? Want me to get your cock out baby? Want me to make you come?" Niall nods, hands straining in Harry grip. His head falls back onto Harry shoulders but then Harry is grabbing the back of his neck again, fingers digging in as he pushes Niall head back up.   
He manages to keep the pace going, Niall's body jolting harshly each time Harry fucks into him.   
"You're being so good. Taking me so well, so open and wet from them that you didn't even need me to get you ready. Not sure you have been good enough for me to let you come though." Niall grones, tugging his hands again, his hips bucking.  
"Think your cock should stay exactly where it is." Niall pushes back against Harry and he is not even sure what he is trying to do. Get fucked harder so maybe he could come or get Harry off him so he can do it himself.   
Harry responds by pushing back twice as hard, stopping all his movements as he slams Niall back into the wall pressing him forward until he is standing poker straight. 

Harry moans, kissing at the back off Nialls neck almost coming with how tight Niall feels around him stood like this. 

"Move. Fucking move." Niall tried to stick his arse out again to feel the drag of Harrys cock inside him but Harry is stronger and Niall barely moves at all. This is worse. Having Harry inside him but not moving is so much worse then when he was fucking him hard and not letting him get anywhere near coming. 

"Say you're mine. Only mine." Niall swollows, he wants to kiss Harry. Turn around in his arms and kiss his softly while telling him that he really is only his. 

"I'm yours. Belong to you and only you, I only ever want you. Love you Harry, love you so much please." Harry's hand moves up Niall's top, feeling the soft skin of his stomach, the small bump of his nipple and the hardnest to his chest before coming out of the collar to wrap around his neck. He grips until he hears Niall gasp, struggle for breath like he knows he likes then he starts to fuck him again. 

Nialls moans are barely there, just small little gasp that manage to get out around Harry's hand gripping as his throat. The sound of skin slapping on skin is louder now that Niall's moans have been practically silenced and it has shivers going up Harry's spine. He looks down, can see himself disappearing into Niall's tight hole. He moans pressing more kisses into Niall's neck as his stomach starts to tighten. The warmth spreads up from his balls to his chest and he has just enough time to release Niall's neck to quickly move down to gently release his cock.   
"Oh god, oh fuck yes Harry." Harry grips him hard, pumping his cock fast his movements becoming sloppy as he get closer to coming.  
"I'm coming. I'm coming." Harry feels Niall's whole body tense and curl into him, his arse squeezing around his cock. He lets go on Niall's wrist and he keeps then there raised above his head like he has not even notched Harry's grip leave and it has another wave of warmth rush over him. He cups his hand in front of Niall's cock just in time to catch his come. It spills over his fist and hits his hand for what feels like ages. Niall is now flopping against him, arms falling down to his side as he comes and comes.   
"So good. So fucking good. Shit yeah." Harry starts coming, body jolting as he spills inside Niall pressing as close to him as he can not caring that he is getting his come covered hands all over him.   
"Fuck." He keeps moving slowly, waiting for his high to finish a few more spurts of come leaving him.   
He stops with a grunt, now so aware of how sweaty both him and Niall are making their skin tacky and their clothes cling to them. Harry stomach muscles are burning and when he looks down he can see the skin around Niall arse already turning read from where his hips had been slamming into him. They look a mess, but Niall looks so fucked out Harry really could not care less. 

He pulls out of Niall gentle, thumb rubbing in soothing circles when Niall let's out a whine at the feeling. 

"Woah" They both turn their heads towards the doorway where Zayn and Matt are both standing.   
"They was fucking hot." Harry grones pulling his and Niall's trousers back up. He pulls Niall away from the wall holding him to his chest. 

"Well I'm glad you enjoyed. We are going to take a shower now." Niall holds tightly onto Harry, legs like jelly as they go upstairs and into the bathroom. 

Harry undresses him before removing his own clothes then leans around Niall to turn the shower on.   
"You ok?" Niall nods. He is dazed, head still fuzzy and he feel like he is outside of his body watching as Harry kisses around his face and smooths his hand over his hair.   
"Yeah. Love you. Really, really love you." Harry smiles pressing a small soft kiss to Niall's lips.   
"I love you too baby. A ridiculous amount." Niall giggles poking at Harry's stomach before letting himself be lead into the shower so Harry can wash them both down. 

"In all seriousness did you enjoy last night?" Harry asks while lathering shampoo in Niall's hair, making sure to keep skin to skin contact with him.   
"Yeah I did. Did you? You don't regret it?"   
"No. I had fun. Was hot seeing you like that. Don't think I need to do it again mind. Feel a bit possessive now." Niall laughs leaning his head back to rise of the shampoo.   
"Really I didn't notice. But same, we don't need to do it again. Just you and me from now on for like forever." Harry brings Niall's head back to kiss him.  
"Forever. That sounds nice." Niall nuzzles into Harry's neck enjoying the warmth of him and the water washing over them.  
"Forever."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> how bloody proud are we all of Louis right now? My boy has been through some tough shit and has come out fighting. So proud baby!


	7. Chapter 7

A/N Just a small happy update before I throw some drama in

 

 

Niall looks down at Harry asleep. The blanket is pulled up to his shoulder so just his face is poking out. His lips are pouted and Niall can see lines on his cheek from where the pillow had marked him during the night. 

He was beautiful. So beautiful and Niall is completely floored everyday because he is Niall's. Niall can say Harry is his. How did he get so bloody lucky? 

He has the first copy of his new book in his hand, delivered just a moment ago. 

It is so perfect and he is so proud and he can't wait for Harry to see it. 

It's Hardback. His first Hardback book and it's big and the cover is just how he wanted it to be. Drawn up by River during a late night conversations when she could not sleep because the baby was kicking and Niall couldn't sleep because he had writers block.   
He talked and she listened and then it was just there. A small doddle on a napkin left over from dinner. 

A paper house with a beautiful garden. One half of the house had caught fire and that was it. River had managed to capture the feeling in that small picture. When Niall was told his mum was going to die he felt like his home, his perfect home was burning to the ground around him. 

And now here was that picture. Bigger of course and more carefully drawn by River. It was beautiful. Tragically beautiful. 

He ran his fingers over it, feeling the slight raise in the lettering of the title before opening his bedside table and placing it inside and closing the draw. 

Harry couldn't see it until later. 

He lifts the covers off the bed up and climbs in. Harry's alarm will go in a minute so he can make one of his gross smoothies before getting ready for work.   
Niall should be able to squeeze in a cuddle and a kiss. Maybe a nice morning hand job. 

He kisses Harry, his lips soft and warm sending a tingle down Niall.   
Harry doesn't respond to the kiss, because Harry is a heavy sleeper and his alarm when it goes off will be loud enough to wake the whole street. It has been the cause of many of Niall's heart attacks. 

They might have a baby soon.

 Niall slowly moves his hand down Harry chest feeling the slight bump to his stomach as he goes down. He had caught Harry pouting at his reflection the other morning. It was the most adorable thing ever. So was his little belly. 

If they have this baby. No, when they have this baby, Harry will need to learn how to wake up easier. Niall is not doing night duty alone. No sir. 

He hooks his fingers into Harry boxers managing to wiggle them down enough to release his dick. 

Still soft but not for long if Niall has any say in the matter. 

He keeps his grip soft at first. Just small gentle tugs as Harry grows harder in his hand. 

He sighs, body giving a twitch but still sleeping. 

Niall speeds up, dragging the blanket down Harry shoulders and down past his knees so he can see his hand working over his dick. 

Harry's breathing speeds up. His stomach rising and falling and his hands curling into the mattress when Niall flicks his wrists, drags his thumb over the tip before squeezing a little and moving down again. 

He quickens  with Harry breathing, looking back up at him when he lets out a broken moan. His eyes are just opening, blinking sleepily back at Niall as his whole body jerks and he starts spilling over Niall's hand. 

Niall slowly strokes him through it until his body sags and he is bashing his hand away too sensitive to be touched anymore. Niall brings his hand to his mouth to lick off the mess, Harry watching him with a lazy smile. 

"That's a nice way to wake up." If Niall was not hard before then Harry's morning voice would have definitely got him there. 

"Yeah?" Niall swings his leg over Harry's waist and sit's up so he is straddling him, his now soft cock below his arse. He hisses at the sensitivity as Niall leans back into it, pulling his own dick out of his boxers.   
"Yeah." Harry leans up on his elbows watching Niall work over his own cock, hand moving fast.   
"You're so beautiful. Love you. Love waking up with you." Harry grips onto Niall leg, fingers spreading over his knees eyes wide.

"Mouth. Come in my mouth please." Please. Fucking please. Like Niall is doing something nice for him. Fuck, he really lucked out with this one.

Niall crawls up Harry's body until his knees are resting by his shoulders then raises himself up so he can push into Harry's mouth that is open and ready for him. 

Harry grips his arse and pushes him forward until his cock hits the back of his throat, his eyes screwing shut as he moans around Niall.  

And god, Harry sucking his cock will never get boring. He always acts like it's a treat for him. Like having Niall fuck into his mouth is the best thing he can possible have. 

Niall moves slowly, dragging himself back until just the tip of his cock is resting on Harry lips. Plump and red and wet. Fuck. Then he pushes back in until Harry is gagging and spluttering and looking so blissed out Niall has to grit his teeth with it. 

Harry let's him do this a few times before he grows frustrated with it and then there is a finger right at Niall's hole and it's wet so Harry must have scooped up some of his own come from his stomach. Harry has half a finger in, wet but still dry enough that it burns. A pleasant burn that has Niall crying out and spilling into Harry's mouth. 

He stills letting Harry lick him clean before crawling back down to flop onto his stomach, face resting on Harry chest. 

"Hmmm good morning." Niall smiles, nipping at one of Harry's nipples.   
"Morning" Harry's alarm starts blaring, which is bad. Horrible, horrible mean alarm. This means Harry will get out of bed. Niall very much likes Harry in bed. 

"Why are you up so early." My book arrived and I had to get up to receive it so that you didn't see it because I have a surprise for you that's going to knock your socks off. 

"Don't know. Just am I suppose." Harry tugs at his hair before gently pushing him off so he can get out the bed. 

"I need to get ready to go try and teach a bunch of eight year olds how to play with their keyboards." Niall hooks his feet around Harry's waist and tugs him enough to send him falling back onto the bed. On top of Niall. Which is very much where he should forever. 

"How about you stay home and teach me the keyboard. Hot cross buns and shit like that. Twinkle, twinkle." Harry laughs face buried in Niall's shoulder.

"Like you want me for my musical skills." Niall grips at Harry arse, rolling his hips up. 

"You're right. I'm a liar. I just want you to stay here and make love to me all day. Want to be selfish and keep you to myself." Harry raises his head to kiss Niall. 

"I want that too. But you know, bills to pay." Niall bites down on Harry bottom lip and tugs it.

"I can pay the bills. I can pay everything." 

"Niall Horan are you implying I'm some kind of sex worker? Please you all day in return for money. How very dare you." Niall wraps Harry's hair around his fingers deepening the kiss and just enjoying the slide of Harry's lips on his for a moment. The taste of his tongue, still with the hint of Niall's come on it. 

"Yes. Definitely implying that. Want that very much actually. You look after me and I will look after you." Harry playfully slaps Niall's bum before wiggling out of his grip and standing straight. 

"Sorry love. This man takes care of himself." Niall pouts as Harry walks around the room getting dressed. There should be a law against Harry putting clothes on. 

Then again he does teach a class full of kids so maybe not. Just at home then. 

"Want some food?" Niall scoffs rolling onto his stomach.  
"Always." 

Xxxxxx

 

"So you're going to help me with this right, because it needs to be perfect." River walks over to the counter, Nolan asleep in his wrap against her chest.

"Of course I am love, but even if you messed this meal up it wont change his answer."

"Yeah well right now we do not know what his answer is going to be so lets just get this right." River runs her hand down Niall's back. He is tense and he was not nervous or worried before but now that he is getting ready and his book is just upstairs and in a few hours he is going to be going trough with his plan he is started to crap himself. 

"Right silly pants, you start cutting the veg and I will work on seasoning the meat. You want to soak it in the sauce for at least four hours. I will set the oven to the right temperature and all you have to do is put the meat in. Cook for three hours Niall and not a single second longer. You can put the veg in the same dish, the potatoes go in for half an hour. I will make some salad and leave it in the fridge for you to get out. I will also make you some batter for some Yorkshire Puds and you just gotta tip it out into the tray a cook for about twenty mins." Niall loves River.He really, really loves her. 

"Never move out." River laughs hand running over Nolan's head as she head towards the fridge.

"I have a feeling that after tonight I am going to want to be a few streets away." Niall beams because yeah she will. Everyone will. It's a good idea actually. Everyone pack up and leave so he can have really loud over the top sex with his boyfriend all the time. 

"Can you write down everything you just said babe. I forgot it already."

"Jesus Ni."

 

xxxxxxxxx

Niall is looking at his reflection biting down on his lip. He knows he should not stress about how he looks. Harry thinks he looks good whatever. And Niall knows that because Harry is always, always telling him.  He looks good and he smells good and he taste good. 

God he loved Harry. He had no idea, when he was this stupid thirteen year old boy walking into this house for the first time. When Harry came stumbling out of the kitchen with these ridiculous cupcakes he made for Niall to welcome him. How was Harry ever just Liam's dad to him when he is his whole world now. 

He tugs at his shirt, smooths down his jeans. Fluff's up his hair and nods to himself. 

He walks to his bedside table pulling his book out, now wrapped up with a little bow. His hands are shaking as he walks down the stairs. He can do this. It's so right. Everything is just so right.

He sets the book down on the floor by his chair and double checks the food. Now he just has to wait for Harry. 

xxxxxx

"Hi love, good day at work?" Niall steps forward to help Harry out of his bag and jacket, hanging both up for him as he sips his shoes off. 

"Yeah it was fun. How was yours?" Harry wraps his arms around Niall's waist tugging him closer so he can lean down and push his nose into his hair.

"It was OK. Missed you." 

"Missed you too. You look really nice, and it smells great. Is River cooking?" Niall leans his head back so he can capture Harry in a kiss.

"No River is spending the night with Macy. I am cooking. For you. For us." 

"Ooo like a date night. Have I got time to change so I don't smell like school." He smells great. Like school yes but still so Harry that Niall's mouth waters.

"Yeah, I will go dish up." Niall is still shaking as he enters the kitchen again but Harry did not notice anything was off about him so that's good. He did not need his surprised ruined before they had even managed to eat. 

Oh god. This is happening. 

xxxxxx

"This is amazing baby, thank you." Niall smiles across at Harry before taking a sip of his wine. Harry his munching on a potato eyes glued to Niall as he chews. 

Niall loves him. He loves him so much. Too much sometimes and Niall feels he could explode with it for sure. 

He had to do it now. He was going to burst if he didn't and then he will  just blurt it out. 

He leans down to pick the book up, smiling at Harry as he passes it across the table. Harry puts his cutlery down, wiping at his mouth before taking it from Niall.

"What's this?"

"Just open it." Niall's voice shakes and its the first time all evening that his nerves have shown. Harry looks worried for a second but then his attention is on the present in his hand and he shoves his plate to the side so he can set it down to unwrap it. He takes his time, unwrapping the bow and tearing gentle at the paper. Niall changes his mind. He hates him. 

Harry face brightens the second he see's the book, eyes wide and shining as he takes in the cover.

"Oh wow Ni, it looks so good baby. Congratulations." Niall's takes a deep breath hands clutching onto the edge of the table.

"Look at the first page." Harry looks at him for a moment then opens the book. His eyes skim the words for a second then he clears his throat to read it out loud. 

Dedicated to Harry and Liam.

When I think back on my journey with cancer it's always Harry and Liam's faces I see. When my mum first got her diagnosis they were the first people I went to. Every step we took through those horrible two years they were always a step behind ready to catch me.

When we finally lost mum it was Harry and Liam who put me back together piece by piece and I will never be able to thank them enough or repay them for the way they would drop anything to be there.

Harry. Mr Harold styles. My Harry.   
You. You are the reason I smiled again. You are the reason for my laughter. You are the reason for it all.

I never wound have imagined how much you would protect me, care for me and love me.

You are my everything and I am so, so thankful for all you have done for me since I lost mum.

I put you through hell a few times, and don't say I didn't because yes I really did.   
You stuck in there for me though and I'm pretty glad you did.

You are my life. You are my smile. You are my heart.

I love you a ridiculous amount and with you I will always be okay.

(P.s thanks for raising my best friend, I kinda love him a lot too)

"Ni..." Niall nods, wiping at his eyes. He can do this. 

"Next page Harry." Niall is slipping off the chair and removing the small box from his pocket as Harry turns to the next page. 

Will you Marry me?

Harry gasps and when he looks up Niall is down on one knee, small ring box open to show Harry the most beautiful ring he has ever seen. 

"Oh my god." His voice breaks and then he is on his knees hands wrapping around Niall's wrist.

"Harry will you Marry me?"

"Yes. Oh my god Yes." Niall takes the ring out of the box, Harry holding his hand to help steady him as he slides it onto Harry's finger. A perfect fit because Niall had measured his finger while he was asleep. 

"I love you." Harry laughs then pulls Niall in for a kiss, both smiling so much their teeth clash and its wet because both are crying now. 

"You asked me to Marry you."

"I did." Harry pushes Niall down onto his back covering his body with his own.

"I'm going to be your husband." He kisses over Niall's face, hands wrapped in his shirt. 

"I'm going to be the best husband Niall. Thank you. I love you. Oh god I love you so much." 

Harry said yes. Harry said yes. Niall can't believe he will get to call this man his husband. 

He probably shouldn't have been surprised. He knew Harry wanted to get married. He is surprised still, and will probably feel like this for the rest of his life with Harry. 

He feels it while slowly undressing Harry taking his time to kiss and touch every part of him. He feels it when he opens him up. He feels it when he pushes into him. He feels it when Harry judders and comes apart underneath him. He feels it afterward when they are a mess on the kitchen floor, Harry's ring skimming over his skin. 

Love. Happiness. Everything. 


	8. chapter 8

Niall is laying on the bed, hand raised above his head admiring the ring on his finger. He can hear Harry down the hallway in the shower singing. It's all quite perfect really.

It kind of sucked that Harry had to go to work today. Niall would happily spend all of today continuing the celebration of their engagement. A celebration that involved no clothes. A lot of his plans with Harry involved no clothes. Maybe he needs to get better at making plans.

Harry walks into the bedroom completely naked and still wet.

No. His plans definitely don't need to get better.

"What are you doing today?" Niall sits up, crossing his legs.

"Not much. I have some emails to answer, a phone called scheduled with Sonya then I am meeting Zayn and Liam at the park with Elliott before Rae comes out of school. Then I am all yours." Niall watches Harry bend down as he rummages for some clothes.

"Goody. Can you invite Liam over for dinner? Feel like I haven't seen him properly for ages."

"Yeah course. You want me to wait till then to tell him about us being engaged." He is engaged. Actually engaged. With a ring on his finger.

"Like I would expect you to spend the day with him and not tell him." OK good. Niall would have died not telling Liam or Zayn. 

"I'm taking your name right? Because Niall Styles has a better ring to it then Harry Horan." Harry yanks on some jeans spinning to face Niall with a grin.

"I love Harry Horan. It sounds like some comic book hero don't you think. Harry Horan." Niall laughs, shaking his head.

"No, it sounds like some fifty year old man. Niall Styles sound better. I want you name. It's like I belonging to you." 

 

"Should I be worried that you seem to really enjoy belonging to me?" Harry walks over to the bed, buttoning up his shirt. 

"No. You should be honoured. Hey so Niall Styles also kinda rhymes so that defiantly decides it for us."

"You are an idiot." Niall grabs the bottom of Harry's shirt and tugs him down for a kiss. 

"You said yes to marrying this idiot." 

"Guess that makes me an idiot too." Niall rubs his nose against Harry's, eyes narrowed. 

"Yeah it really does. I'm the bride just so you know. So I expect a ridiculous speech at our wedding full of wedding puns and dad jokes." Harry cups Niall's cheek with his hand, this thumb smoothing over his bottom lip. There is a look in his eyes. Happy. It makes a warmth pool in Niall's chest and spread over his body. He makes Harry happy.

"I can't wait to marry you. Thank you for asking me, for wanting me." Niall reaches up to grab his hands, slotting their fingers together.

"I love you. Thank you for not giving up on me." 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The park was a lot busier then it normally was on a Tuesday afternoon so it takes Niall some time to find Zayn and Liam. He eventually spots them by the entrance to the children's playground both leaning against the fence chatting as Elliott stumbled around their feet. Tuesday park meets ups were Zayn and Niall's weekly tradition. It gave them time to catch up just the two of them and also gave Niall some time with just Elliott as Rae tended to take over his attention when she was about. The fact that Liam had taken the day off work and was joining them hopefully didn't mean anything bad was going on. 

When he finally steps past what feels like a hundred Pre school kids and reaches them both he holds his hand up with a shit eating grin.

"Guess who is getting married."

"Oh my god no way!" Liam grabs Niall's hand and holds it up in front of him, his smile taking up half his face.

"This is OK right? Not too weird for you?" Liam tuts, dropping Niall's hand to pull him into a hug.

"Why would it be weird? Niall you make my Dad happy and that's all I care about. And he makes you happy too. All good from where i'm standing." 

"Yeah, congrats man. This is super cool." Zayn joins in on the hug, Elliott's bag banging into Niall side. Elliott who is currently climbing up the big slide.

"Z, mate your child is about to take the leap of faith unaided." Zayn looks over his shoulder.

"Oh crap." Zayn drops Elliott's bag and goes running over to the slide to help him. 

"Seriously I am really happy for you both Ni. I mean ask me five years ago if I wanted you to be the one to marry my dad then hard no. Now I'm pretty sure you're his person so please marry the crap out of him."

"I plan too, and thanks for being so OK with it all. Your like the bestest best friend ever."

"So who asked who? Bet dad cried." They both walk through the gate that leads into the playground to join Zayn at the slide. 

"I asked him. We both cried actually. I was proper shitting myself." Zayn comes to stand next to Niall, eyes still on Elliott as he starts picking up wood chips and throwing them in the air. 

"I don't know why you were, that man was no way going to say no to you." Niall hears it then. And it's defiantly the sound of a camera shutter. He looks around, zoning out of the conversation to try and hear the sound again. He can't see anyone with a camera, not the type he heard. Its all just mum with their phones out. 

Niall does not get photographed out much, but there are a few pictures if you google him. Just some random ones of him at the supermarket or out walking with Harry. And its normally some fan who has uploaded them. He does not like this though. Not when Elliott is just a few feet in front of him and the person is out of sight. 

"You alright Niall?" Niall attention snaps back to Liam who is looked at him concerned. 

"Yeah. Think someone is taking pictures of us." Liam starts looking around and out of the corner of his eye Niall can see Zayn incing closer to Elliott. 

"What like a fan?" 

"No I don't think so. Feels strange." 

"What like this stalker person?" The word sends a jolt through Niall. He had almost forgot about that. 

About being watched at the wedding. The moved notebook and the missing house key. The key that was not at the hotel or the car or his wallet or his bag. And now that its been mentioned that is exactly what is feels like. That uneasy feeling. The hairs on the back of his neck on end. The feeling of someones eyes on him.

Zayn is looking nervously from Elliott to the area that Niall had been staring at. He doesn't want to make him worry, this is his place that he brings his son. 

"No, i'm sure it was just something else. Hows Macy Liam?" He can tell Zayn is still tense, eyes still flicking about as he moves closer to Elliott again. 

"Good,she is actually moving back home in a couple of days. Said she was ready to move on and work on getting us back to how we were." Well that is a relief. Niall can't even begin to imagine how hard it must be for Macy, to make that decision to forgive Liam after what she knows he has done. Niall was glad she had, he had no doubts that Liam would never cheat on her again. 

"That's great Liam. I'm really happy for you."

"Yeah, its awesome. She wants to sleep in different beds to begin with, but just having her back in the house is enough for now. She deserves to take all the time she needs. I was a real dickhead." That is probably a massive understatement but at least he knows. 

"Well just make sure you treat her like a princess and i'm sure it will all move along nicely." Niall watches Zayn slot Elliott into a swing, about six mums all turn to watch him their own children forgotten. Niall was sure Zayn was the reason for most scrapped knees and bumped heads on a Tuesday afternoon. 

"You know at your wedding..." Niall hears the camera go off again. "Dad is going to make the most ridiculous speech..." Again "and wear like this really stupid suit..." Again "and I am going to have to spend the whole day listening to you go on and on about how cute his puns and jokes are or how adorable it is that he can pull the suite off. That sucks for me." Niall whirls around and he knows, he knows someone is there just watching him and taking photos and that it's not someone who should be doing it. 

"Hey Liam! Can you take over." Liam jogs off to start pushing Elliott on the swing, Zayn coming over to stand with Niall. 

"You think someone is here don't you? Like watching you?" Niall shrugs, stepping towards Zayn more.

"Don't know. Could just be me being paranoid. I mean there is no reason for anyone to want to like follow me around is there." They both look around for a bit, but there is no more sound and all they can see is mums and dads and kids. 

"You know whats weird?" Zayn speaks up, moving in front of Niall to block his view.

"Vampires. Like if they where real one could be here right now." Niall raises his eyebrow. "Or maybe like five are here right now and we would not know. Some of the kids could be vampires which is like so much scarier, can you imagine if Elliott was a vampire. He would be so hard to parent. I could be a vampire. If i could like walk in the sun I would have no reason to tell you all. I could be a vampire and one day just lose control and feed off you." Niall knows it coming but Zayn still manages to move quicker then him and leap forward to attach his mouth to Niall neck.

"Get off you idiot." Niall laughs loudly, hand falling back as Zayn pretends to bite down on his neck. He was trying to distract him and it was kinda working. 

"I wonder what you would taste like." Zayn pulls him closer biting down on his collarbone. 

"Ouch, you're not actually a vampire."

"Are you sure. It would explain my unnatural good looks." He laughs into Niall's neck, placing a kiss where he had bitten.

"So full of yourself. Freak." Niall wipes at his neck with his sleeve pushing Zayn away from him. 

"Takes one to know one." Niall flips him off, walking away to go have his turn pushing Elliott. 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Liam leaves them when its time to go get Rae, so he can go spend some time with Macy. Niall straps Elliott into his car seat while Zayn gets out his drink bottle and a snack to keep him happy on the drive to school.

"I am getting so fed up with London traffic. Would be so nice to just bugger off to the countryside, like somewhere in Suffolk with hardly any traffic and pollution."

"Is that something you and Matt would do?" He can picture them all in a cute little house surrounded by fields, the kids in small village schools and going on walks in their wellies. He would miss them far to much. Maybe they should all just move out to the countryside. Bring havoc to some poor unsuspecting village. 

"No. As mad as London can be its where the kids family is. Think we would get lonely. You would miss me far too much." Niall reaches across to poke at Zayn's cheek. Zayn glares grabbing his finger and pulling it. 

"Would miss you a little. Miss the kids more though. Never take my babies away." Zayn drops Niall finger, glancing over at him.

"Would never." By some miracle Zayn manages to park right outside the school gates so instead of having to get out and walk they manage to waste some time in the car playing a game of rock, paper, scissors until the kids come piling out. Niall jumps out of the car with Zayn, eyes scanning the playground for Rae. 

"Uncle Niall!" She burst through the crowd arms held up in the air, a drawing clutched in her hands as she zooms towards him, bag slamming against her back. 

"Hi Princess." Niall scoops her up pressing kisses into her cheeks.

"Good day at School?" She nods then starts giggle as Zayn starts kissing the other side of her face.

"Yes! We done finger painting and then we got to look at some birds and Melvin wet himself on the floor." 

"Oh no, poor Melvin." Zayn takes Rae from Niall, helping her get into the car.

"Uncle Niall can you help me with my homework. I got's to draw a picture." Niall was supposed to be going home to meet Harry from work, but hell yeah he can help with homework.

"I think Daddy would be better then me love but I will give it a go." Zayn hops back in the car, pulling out into the school traffic. 

When they get back to the house, Zayn takes all the school stuff and goes into the kitchen while Niall settles at the coffee table with Rae and Elliott.

"I have to draw family. I told Mrs Baker then I got's a big family so she said i can get help."

"Ok, so who we drawing?" Rae grabs her pencils bringing them over to to the table, picking out a pink one for Niall and a blue one for herself.

"Everyone! But I want Daddy and Papa to be the biggest." Zayn comes back in with a snack for Rae and a cup of tea for Niall, setting both down on the table before dropping onto the sofa behind Niall. They work in silence, Niall concentrating extra hard to draw Harry's curly hair. Elliott crawls off his lap to go play on his soft matt and Zayn flick through his phone, one hand lazily stroking over Niall's back. 

Niall loves this kind of moment. Where he was really in the middle of the family time with the kids. It made his want for his own family grow to an almost overwhelming size. 

He takes a break once he has finished drawing himself, Harry and Liam. Rae now working on what he thinks is Louis. He leans back into Zayn, the back of his head resting on his stomach. 

"You alright?" Niall smiles and nods. 

"Yeah, pretty good." 

xxxxxxx

Niall is aware that he is home two hours later then he implied he would be. Not that him and Harry had set plans made or anything so he can't really work out why Harry seems to have an attitude with him. 

He is currently puffing up cushions more aggressively then anyone needs to. 

"What's wrong?" Harry huffs, throwing the cushion back down on the sofa. 

"Why would anything be wrong? Is there a reason something should be wrong?" Alright then, something was defiantly wrong. 

"How about we skip the part where I keep asking and you deny anything is pissing you off until I finally ask enough to get you to tell me." Harry stops what he is doing so he can get his phone out of his pocket. He fingers work over the screen quickly, jabbing so hard at the screen Niall can hear it. 

"Someone sent me this over email." Harry holds his phone out for Niall, who takes it cautiously. It can't be good if its got Harry riled up. What if it was to do with the adoption. What if they decided to not let them adopt after all? 

The email has been sent from an unknown email address. So that means Niall can relax. He looks over the email, scrolling up and down feeling himself get more agitated the more he looks at it. 

"What the hell is this?" The subject line is just a load of numbers and the actual email is full of pictures of Niall with Zayn today. 

"I don't know. You tell me." There are a few of them just standing and talking. None with Liam in from some reason. 

Then there are a load of Niall pressed against Zayn head flung back in laughter as Zayn attacks his neck. Then some of them walking to the car. Niall strapping Elliott in. 

When he see's ones of him and Zayn sitting in the car outside school laughing together his blood runs cold. 

He knew he was being watched at the park but he had no idea he had been followed after. 

There was a few off him holding Rae, him and Zayn both kissing her before getting back into the car. Then some of him going into Zayn's house then coming out again. 

"Harry, what the fuck are all these?" 

"No idea. I don't know the email address and when I tried to reply it just said the address does not exist." Harry's voice is cold and the look on his face is worse. 

"I don't understand. Why are you being funny with me about this? Someone has been following me all day."

"You both looked pretty cosy." Niall just stares at Harry, phone clutched in his hand. What the hell was Harry implying? And why was he not more concerned about who took the pictures in the first place. 

"Cosy? It was just a normal day. What are you trying to imply?" Harry snatches his phone back, throwing it down on the side.

"He is all over you and you seem to be enjoying it a little too much if i'm honest." What the actual fuck is happening right now? Since when does Harry act like his friendship with Zayn could be anything but that. 

"We were fooling about. I thought someone was watching me and was getting worried so he started messing about. What are you getting at right now? You know my friendship with Zayn is just that. I literally just asked you to marry me and now your acting like I have been off fucking my best friend all day!" 

"He was kissing your neck!" 

"No he was not!"

"Umm guys. I just got Nolan to sleep." River is standing at the bottom of the stairs, holding the baby monitor up for them to see. 

"Harry thinks me and Zayn are fucking."

"Don't bring other people into this and I never said you were fucking."

"Well i'm pretty sure that is what you were getting at." Niall is shaking and he hates that he is feeling this angry towards Harry when it has not even been a full 24 hours since they got engaged. But there is no way he will stand for Harry getting jealous over his friendship with someone. 

"Sorry River, we will keep it down." River nods once then goes back up the stairs to give them some privacy again. Niall lets out a sigh feeling guilty for disturbing her when they were supposed to be making things easier for her, not dragging her into their fights. 

"I don't think you're having sex with him, sorry if you thought that. I was just expecting you home sooner and then I got these and it just shocked me a little. I did not mean to overreacted." Niall walks round the sofa taking Harry's face in his. 

"I was helping Rae with her homework that's why I was late. You knew I was with Zayn today and you know how we are with each other."

"I know. I know that, it's just. You look like a family. It just felt strange when I was looking at them and I had not shaken the feeling off before you come home. I'm sorry." Niall pulls Harry down towards him until their foreheads are touching. 

"I'm sorry too, I should not have gotten angry. I'm really freaked out by these pictures though. Who would follow me and take these?" 

"You think it's a fan? Someone a little to invested?" It is a possibility. Niall has always been honest about his characters being based of him and Harry. There is a chance someone could have gotten to attached and have latched on to Niall like he is the character in real life. Or just because he was the one who created it. 

Why would an obsessed fan take photos that make Niall look bad and send them to Harry though? His fans love him and Harry together, this person seemed to want to cause trouble between them. 

It had a really sinister feeling to it. The person who took these photos was definitely the person who was in the hotel room and there was a massive chance this person had a key to their house.

"Can we change the locks please?" Harry kisses Niall's head, his hands gripping onto his arms.

"Yeah, I will call someone tomorrow." 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Niall pushes Harry onto his back, smirking down at him as he raises himself up and lines himself up with Harry cock before sinking back down. 

"God yeah." He starts rolling his hips, hands pressed to Harry chest for support. He loves how full he feels in this position. He can feel every inch of Harry dragging against him and he loved that he could set his own pace. Until Harry got too frustrated and started fucking up into him that is. 

"Fuck baby. Feel so good, love you riding me. Look so fucking sexy." Niall moans, head falling forward as Harry starts to thrust up as Niall goes down his body jolting with each movement. 

Harry is hitting his prostate dead on each time he slams into him and he can feel the hot twisting of his stomach as he gets closer and closer. He knows Harry is close too because his movements speed up and his grip on his hips get tighter and his moan become more desperate. 

He just gets a hand around his cock when he first see's it. What look like feet going past the door. He motions for Harry to be quite thinking River must be up. 

Then he see it again. Dark shadows of someones feet under the door. This time they stop and stay right outside. Niall stops, letting go of himself as Harry keeps going. 

It 2am. River would not actually be up at this time. The only reason she would have to leave the room is to go use the bathroom, and nobody went into the bathroom. 

"Harry." Niall whispers, his heart slamming so hard in his chest he feels light headed. He raises himself back up until Harry is slipping out of him with a whine. 

"Harry someone is outside the room." Harry rolls onto his stomach looking over at the door. Niall gets off the bed pulling on a pair of boxers. The feet move and Niall is out the door in a flash and across the hallway to Rivers room. He feels Harry run past him down the stairs. River is curled up asleep, Nolan in his Moses Basket next to her. He leaves the room, heartbeat pounding in his ears as he goes down the stairs. Harry is stood in the living room, all lights switched on.

"There is nobody here Niall."

"There was. I saw. I saw someone standing outside our room." He goes over to the front door turning the handle. Locked. 

He goes past Harry into the kitchen to try the back door, that is locked too. 

"All the windows are closed and there is no sigh of a break in. There was nobody here. It must have been your eyes playing trick on you."

"You didn't see anything?" Harry shakes his head starting to switch lights off looking annoyed. 

"I swear there was someone there." He feels sick with how scared he is. There was definitely someone in this house a moment ago.

"How Niall? The windows are closed and locked and so are the doors. The rooms are empty too."

"My key." It was so obvious. The person who was here was the person who was doing everything else. 

"Oh god they have my keys Harry. Its the same person who has been following me and who was in our hotel room. They got in using my key." Harry shakes his head walking back over to the stairs.

"No. I'm not having this conversation again. Yes some creep took photos of you but nobody was in this house. We would have known." But he does know. Harry goes back up the stairs leaving Niall stood downstairs alone in the dark. He does know, Niall knows someone was here. 

Who the hell is doing this? 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

The next morning Niall is jumpy and so stressed he can barely function. Harry ends up taking the day off work and spends most of it trying to convince Niall that everything is fine. 

Niall wants to go to the police. He wants to tel them about the hotel room and the key. He wants to show them the email to Harry and tell them this person is getting into his home. 

If Harry does not believe him then what is the point?

Someone comes to change the locks before lunch, Harry paying the emergency fee so that Niall can be a little more relaxed in his home. It does not work. He feels like they are still in the house, like everything he says is being listened too and everything he does is being watched by some stranger. 

All he wants is Harry to believe him so he can feel a little safer.

"You OK?" Niall is making himself a cup of tea in the kitchen, his new house key sitting beside the kettle. He would have to take it into town later to get copies for everyone. Or maybe he should restrict it to just the people who live here. Maybe having multiple copies is not the best idea right now. There would just be more chance of them getting stolen. He will have to remember to keep checking with Harry and River to make sure they have not lost theirs so they can get the locks changed again as soon as possible. Why had Niall not even thought to do that the moment his key went missing?

It would not have stopped him being followed but it might have stopped this person from coming into his home. Making his own home feel unsafe. 

There is a knock at the door. Niall has not answered Harry and instead is just staring into space, the kettle boiled and ignored next to him. Harry sighs pushing himself away from the wall to go get the door. 

There is a young boy standing there. Well not really a boy, someone about Niall's age maybe.

"Hi, can I help?" He smiles at Harry, long hair pushed back around his face.

"Hello, I was looking for Niall? This is the address I had for him. I'm a friend." Friend? Harry knew all of Niall's friends surly?

"Oh OK. Umm, he is here. Do you want to come in?" The boy smile grows, small dimples appearing on each cheek as he bends down to pick up a bag that was sat by his feet.

"Yes please, that would be amazing. Thank you." Harry closes the door once he has passed. 

"This way." Harry motions for him to follow, walking back into the kitchen.

"Niall love, someone is here to see you. A friend?" Niall looks over his shoulder his eyes widening before a massive smile breaks out over his face.

"Landon?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So who remembers who Landon is????


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> HARRY  
> AT  
> THE  
> MET  
> GALA  
> THAT  
> IS  
> ALL

There is no way in hell Harry just let Niall's ex boyfriend into his house.

Niall is across the kitchen in a flash practically jumping at Landon.

There is no fucking way.

"What are you doing here man!" Landon is quick to wrap his arms around Niall and the sight of his hand spreading out across Niall's back make Harry want to rip them apart.

He is not a jealous person. He spends almost everyday watching Niall drape himself all over Liam and Zayn, cuddling up and looking very much like a couple with whoever is closest to him.   
Niall like to get close to people and Harry gets that and actually he hardly notices it anymore.

But he has never had to deal with an ex boyfriend situation.

Someone who almost took Niall from him for good.  
Someone who has been with Niall. Seen the way Niall looks when he comes undone. He has kissed him, touched him, tasted him and heard him.

He was also far better looking then Harry had imagined.   
He did not imagine dimples.   
Dimples were his thing thank you very much.   
And he was young and probably fun.   
And he was grinning down at his Niall like he was the sun.

"I just wanted a change of scenery you know? A bit of a break."

"You went from Venice to London for a change of scenery?" He is aware that he just made himself sound like a bit of a dickhead. But hey, maybe it will make him leave. Landon steps away from Niall his attention turning to Harry. He was still smiling and even his smile had this cheeky charm to it that just needed to get out of Harry's kitchen.

"You must be Harry. It's nice to meet you." He holds his hand out. "Niall told me loads about you." Harry takes his hand and shakes if, probably a little too hard.

"Nice to meet you too. Afraid I don't really know much about you." Niall shots him a look but Landon just laughs it off shoving his hands into his pocket of his hoodie.

"Where are you staying?" Niall's hand are all over Landon. Running up his arms before tugging at his jumper and then smoothing it back down again. Harry grits his teeth taking a step towards him.

"Nowhere yet. Just going to check into a hotel when I come across one." Harry knows Niall is going to be far to kind to let Landon leave and go walk around London in the cold until he finds an affordable hotel with a room. Still, he doesn't expect Niall to not consider Harry's feelings on the matter.

"Don't be ridiculous. You can stay right here with us. Have to be on the sofa as our friend is staying at the moment too but it's comfortable and free and we can have more time to catch up." 

No. nope. No. Just no!

Harry cannot deal with him being around Niall all the time. That's not fair really. Who should have to put up with an ex staying in the same house as them.

"Really? You would not mind, because that would be amazing." They both turn to Harry and Niall looks so excited and he has been sad all morning no matter what Harry tried to do to cheer him up.

"Yeah, sure. I guess." He is an idiot. A complete idiot.

"I can't believe you are actually here! Do you want a coffee? Or something cold? Have you eaten?" Landon laughs as Niall starts bustling around the kitchen putting the kettle back on and grabbing mugs and opening the fridge to see what food they have.

"A coffee would be great thanks. It's a really beautiful home you have by the way, thank you so much for letting me stay at such short notice. I honestly could have gotten a hotel." Well don't let us fucking stop you.

"No way, this is going to be so much fun! I want to know all about the restaurant and Daisy and Bethany. I have so much to tell you to. I'm so glad your here Lan!"

Lan? Is this what Harry has to deal with? Fucking Lan and talking about people and places that are a part of Niall that he does not know about.

Oh god this is going to be a nightmare.

"Landon, why don't you take yourself into the lounge and get settled." Landon turns to Harry, eyes flicking up and down before he nods, hand squeezing at Niall waist before he picks up his bag and walks out the kitchen.

"Isn't this great? Like super random but great." Niall is still beaming and honestly Harry can't work out if he wants to do everything possible to keep it there or slap it away.

"Since when to we let strangers stay in our home?" Niall's smile falters, a frown forming. Harry does not like that he made Niall lose a little of his shine. 

"He is not a stranger."

"He is to me. And you haven't seen him for what, four year?" The kettle stops boiling but goes ignored, Niall taking a small step away from Harry.

"He is a friend Harry."

"He is your ex." Niall faces darkens and then he is turning so he can start making the drinks.

"So what? Why should that matter. He was my friend before he was my boyfriend and he was after too. Just because he is an ex does not make him a threat." Niall movements are giving away how pissed off he is getting. Sugar spilling over the worktop, spoon clanking against the mugs and milk sloshing over the side.

"How would you feel if my ex walked through the front door and I asked them to stay." Niall grabs his and Landon's mug not looking at Harry as he starts to walk away.

"Technically your ex is your dead wife. So I would say I would be quite happy for you. Definitely wouldn't act like you are about to jump right on her."

"That's not what I am saying. I trust you completely."

"And you can trust him. He is good." This is going so wrong. That last thing Harry wanted was to upset and anger Niall. Especially when his ex is right in the other bloody room.   
It seemed it didn't really take much for Harry to set Niall off these days.

"Harry, he is a friend and I kinda treated him like shit when we where together so the fact that he is still happy to see me and wants to spend time catching up is a really nice thing for me. So deal with it and grow up." Harry watches Niall leave the room before letting out a groan banging his head on the cupboard.

It's fine.  
Totally fine.  
He can do this.  
What he does not need is him and Niall in a bad place while Landon is here. He has to show that they are strong and madly in love and everything to each other.

Harry takes a few deep breaths and a moment to collect his thoughts before swiping up his own drink and joining Niall and Landon in the lounge.

He ignores the pang he feels when he sees them sat closely looking down at something on Landon's phone, both chuckling, and forces a friendly smile on his face. Well he hopes its friendly, there is a high chance he is just grimacing at them both.

"So Landon, what made you decide to come to London?" Landon's' head snaps up, his phone lowering to his lap.

"Like I said I wanted a change of scenery and London is quite the change right? And I knew it would be really cool to see Niall again." Harry nodded taking a sip from his drink.

"I guess so. Any plans for while you are here?" Niall has taken Landon's phone from his lap and is still flicking through looking at some pictures. Harry has an urge to snack the phone out of his hand, his own hands tightening around his mug the heat seeping into his skin.

"Not really sure. Maybe if Ni is not busy he can show me around. Be cool to see how his life here is compared to how life was back home with me." He meets Harry's eyes, the corner of his lip tugging up. Harry's eyes narrow and he really doesn't know how he has not shattered this mug yet.

Niall is still looking down at the phone oblivious to the stare down going on over his head.

"I'm sure it's not not all that different really." Landon's' head tilts to the side.

"Yeah? Suppose that's a good thing if it means Niall is as happy and carefree as he was back then." Fuck you. 

"You could always help Niall with plans for our wedding." The smug look on Landon's face drops slightly and Niall's head is finally raising up from the stupid phone.

"Totally didn't tell you yet. I asked Harry to marry me the other day, I am super romantic and stuff." Harry places his mug down so he can wrap his arms around Niall's middle and pull him back until he is pressed against Harry's front

"You are really romantic babe. It was perfect." Niall head drops back so he can give Harry a cheesy smile and Harry takes the chance to give him a kiss.

Take that Landon.   
"Well congratulations. I'm happy for you both." He takes his phone back from Niall slipping it back into his pocket and moving to the edge of the sofa.

"Maybe I should just go find a hotel. If you're newly engaged you don't need me hanging about."

"Oh well that's very considerate of you." Niall jabs Harry in the stomach with his elbow sitting up straighter.

"It's fine Lan." Fucking Lan. "I really would not have offered if I- if we didn't want you to. Plus we already have our friend River living here so whats one more. She has a baby by the way. It's why she is staying here." Landon relaxes back into the sofa his face softening.

"I love babies. All kids really so that's awesome, and again thanks for letting me stay" Of course he likes kids. Such an arsehole.

"And I can definitely show you around. We don't actually go right into the city much, might be fun to get stuck into some tourist stuff right Haz?" Landon looks slightly put off by Harry being included but manages to keep his face neutral.

"Yeah. Maybe we could invite the others too? Sure they would all like to meet Landon." Niall nods getting excited

"That would be so cool! You will love everyone Landon. It will be so fun going out as a group and having you there! How long are you planning on staying because I can get you on the guest list for my book release party too." Harry sits back, keeping his hand on Niall's waist as he starts making plans with Landon.

Harry can't wait to see how he copes when the whole group is suddenly thrown at him.

Harry hides his smile in his mug.

Xxxxx

Harry closes the bedroom door behind him phone pressed to his ear as he drops onto the bed with a groan.

"When are you back, need help." Louis chuckles into the phone, traffic loud in the background.

"We are at the airport, should be back by morning. What's going on?" Harry rolls onto his back pouting up at the ceiling.

"Niall's ex turned up today." Louis is silent for a moment. Harry hears the squeal of brakes and a horn before before he talks again.

"The Italian bloke?"

"Lives in Italy, not Italian. Niall invited him to stay here. He is really good looking and Niall is far too happy to see him." He needs to repaint the ceiling.   
Repaint the ceiling then kill stupid ex boyfriends.

"That's really weird. Did he say what he was doing there?"

"He wanted a change of scenery apparently. Don't know why he had to come and invade on my live to get that. I hate him already. He is definitely here to get Niall back."

"You are probably being paranoid H, it's been years I doubt he wants Niall back. Maybe he just missed him, they were super close right? Plus Niall is so mad about you he couldn't have him back even if he tried." Harry rubbed at his face. This was just too stressful.

Landon has said he had no set plans for when he was leaving.   
Harry had no idea how long he had to deal with this for.   
He would have to leave them alone while he went to work and he hated the thought. If Harry was not around it gave Landon far too big of an opportunity to worm his way back in with Niall.

"Hopefully you're right. He has come at the worst time too. Me and Niall keep fighting lately." Louis sighs. Harry feels terrible for throwing his problem at him before he has even got back from his honeymoon.

"Listen mate, I will talk to the others and see if we can sort out coming over. See how he feels about staying once he has dealt with all us questioning him yeah? I'm sure between us we can work out what exactly he is up too. He could just be simply visiting an old friend so don't get to worked up over it."

"Yeah ok sounds like a plan, Niall wants us all to go out and do some stuff with him too. Sorry for bothering you, hope the flight is not to bad."

"Flights are always bad. Keep a smile on your face and be so nice that it scares him! Love ya lad."

"I will try. Love you too." Harry hangs up dropping his phone into the bed.

Be so nice it scares him.   
That sounds like a plan.

Harry jumps up of the bed and heads back downstairs.

Niall is in the kitchen sorting out some lunch, Harry can see Landon outside on the phone.

Harry watches Niall for a bit. Eyes moving up his long slim legs, over the swell over his butt and the arch of his back as he works on cutting up some tomatoes. Harry still has no idea how he managed to get someone as good looking as Niall.

He walks over to him, pressing himself against his back, his nose nuzzling into the side of his neck.

"I love you. Sorry we had a fight again."

"Nah wasn't a fight. Just some bickering." He stops and turns in Harry arms, his own arms going up to wrap loosely around Harry's neck pulling him down closer to him.

"I understand why this would be weird for you. I should have considered that before just inviting him to stay. My relationship with Landon is in the past please don't get funny about our friendship now. If he steps out of line you know I will have him out of here as quick as anything. Not that I think he will."

"If he steps out of line I will kick his arse." Niall laughs leaning up to press a kiss to Harry chin, biting down lightly before moving back.

"I know you will. And I love you too, more then anything." Harry smiles, feeling himself relax slightly. He can one hundred percent trust Niall, he never doubted that. And he does believe that if Landon were to try anything Niall would have him out on his arse in a flash.

He need to just focus on being the best fiance he can possible be. If that means pretending to get along with Landon then so be it. Hopefully he won't stay for too long and won't come around again.

Harry kisses Niall, tongue sweeping over his bottom lip before pushing inside. He can taste the tomato that Niall must have been eating as he licks into his mouth, tugging Niall closer by his waist.

Niall's grip around his neck tightened, fingers digging into the back of his neck as they both deepens the kiss, Niall opening his mouth a little more for Harry.

Niall lets out a small whimper, the sound vibrating through Harry as he pressed Niall into the worktop. He considers swiping the mess away so he can sit Niall on there, get between his legs more. Maybe rub up against him until they are both coming.

He settles for sliding his hand down Niall's stomach until he can cup his dick through his jogging bottoms. Niall moans bucking his hips up growing half hard in Harry's hand.

"Whoa! Sorry guys." Harry groans, Niall pushing him away and turning to hide his bulge against the counter.

Landon is looking away from them, phone still clutched in his hands.

For a second Harry forgot they had what could possibly be the biggest cock block under their roof.

"Sorry." Niall is blushing and it's cute and Harry just wants to be able to fuck Niall in his own kitchen.

"No problem umm... newly engaged and all that. Ni mum said to say hello and thank you for having me."

"I will have to talk to her or Skype her at some point." Landon nods, clearing his throat before looking back over to them. Harry smiles resting his head on top of Niall's watching as he cuts the last tomatoes up and scoops it into a bowl.

"Just making some stuff for cheese and tomato toasties" Landon makes a sound of appreciation practically skipping over to stand next to Niall.

"My favourite." Of course. Harry only just stops himself from rolling his eyes and instead turns his face into Niall's hair to breath him in. He smells like Harry's shampoo. Harry has no idea why Niall even buys his own still when he always steals his.

"I was thinking that maybe I could take you both our for dinner tonight? Could be be like a celebration of your engagement and me being here." Why, like seriously why wound they celebrate Landon being here?   
"Your friend could come too if she wants to."

"They would be great Lan, River is probably out until later but me and Harry are definitely up for it."

"Cool it's a date then. You can show me around a little while we are out too. You can pick the restaurant of course." Landon looks up at Harry shoving a stolen tomato into his mouth and winking before stepping back and leaving the room.

Xxxxxx

Niall leads them into 'Sticks'N'Sushi' hand slotted in Harry's as he gives the waiter his name. Landon follows behind hands shoved into his pockets as he looked around taking it all in.

"It's a lot different to mums place that is for sure." Niall chuckles thanking the waiter as he shows then their table and hands them menus.

"That's because nowhere is like your mum's place, one of a kind in all she does that woman. Foods great here though. And I know Sushi is one of your favorites so made sense." Landon grins hand running along Niall's shoulder before he takes a seat across from Harry, making eye contact with him as they sit down.

Harry has never had so many stare downs in his life.   
Best not to get effected by them, after all he will be the one taking Harry to bed tonight.

"I'm just gonna go for a wee. Order for me if they come yeah?" Harry panics as Niall stands back up leaning over to kiss Harry's cheek. He did not want to be left alone with the enemy. Landon seems to be having the same thought as he watches Niall walk off then then to Harry with a nervous laugh once Niall has vanished.

"Like a kid ain't he? Can't go anywhere without having to pee straight away." Harry picks his menu up ignoring Landon as he looks at it. He already knows what he wants but it's better then trying to make conversation.

"Any suggestions?" Harry glances back up. Landon has not touched his menu, arms cross on the table as he looks across at Harry.

"It's all good. Plus Sushi is one of your favourites right? I'm sure you know what to go for." Landon raises his eyebrow, reaching across the table to lower Harry's menu.

"Listen, I get why you might not like the idea of me being here. And I appreciate that you are trying to appear cool with this but it's pretty obvious to me that you would rather I leave." Harry doesn't comment. He didn't want to be heard confirming this but he certainly did not want to deny it.

"I'm going to be here no matter what so maybe we should just get along to make things easier. I don't think Niall will be to happy if I have to leave because his boyfriend couldn't handle a little jealousy." Harry grip on his menu tightens enough to make it crinkle in his hand. Landon looks so smug Harry could happily stand up and punch the idiot in the face.

He sees Niall emerging from the bathroom behind Landon so plants a pleasant look on his face.

"Fiance. Also nothing to be jealous of so there is no problem really is there. Not from me anyway." Niall reaches the table, patting Landon on the back as he sits down.

"Look sharp lads, waiter heading our way. I am starving."

They all order and once they are left alone again Niall and Landon fall into easy conversation about Landon's family and some of the locals.

Niall laughs a lot which Harry loves because Niall laughing is the best thing to him but he hates that Landon is the cause of it.  
Also he feels so left out. He has no idea who these people are they are discussing and they have no end of little inside jokes that Harry could never begin to understand even after Niall tries to explain some.

Niall tries to keep him included. He is always touching Harry in some way. Grabbing his hands, a soft touch to his leg or arm. Hand lazily scratching at the back of Harry's neck. And he keeps looking over at him to make sure he is somewhat keeping up with the conversation.

Harry just tries his best not to pout and make a fuss.

He feels like a third wheel and he has never been made to feel like that with Niall before.

It stings a little but he knows Niall is not doing it on purpose. In fact Niall has been doing everything he can to not do it.

Harry is pretty sure Landon is purposefully turning all conversation into something he knows Harry has no clue about.

Harry just smiles, nods when he should, laughs when Niall laughs and keeps his glare to when just Landon is looking at him.

He really wishes someone else was here though.   
Thank god Louis was back tomorrow, no doubt he could make a good attempt at making Landon back off. All the way back to Venice preferably.

Xxxxx

"Thanks for dinner Lan. It was really nice." Harry walks into the house making a beeline for the kitchen.

Whisky. There is whisky somewhere.   
Maybe he can down it and forget that he knows way to much about a bunch of strangers in Italy.

River is in the kitchen, Nolan cradled to her chest.

"Hey you look stressed." Harry motions over his shoulder where Niall and Landon are walking into the kitchen.

"We have a guest. He is staying with us. It's Landon, from Italy." River looks lost for a moment then her eye widen.

"Oh. Wow really?" Niall walks past Harry to go coo at Nolan.

"Lan, this is River and Nolan."

"Nice to meet you." River nods looking back to Harry.

"Look at this cutey." Landon breezes past hand cupping the back of Nolan's head as he looks down at him.

"Hi little man, you are just the sweetest." Niall nods eyes lighting up like they always do around Nolan. Harry get the same painful pang his always feel when he sees Niall with the kids.

"He is the best. Like so small and he smells amazing." Niall takes Nolan out of Rivers hands holding him up all proud. River takes the opportunity to come over to Harry leaving Niall and Landon fussing over Nolan.

"I'm so confused right now." Join the club. Harry had been confused since he opened the door and found out this stranger is Niall's bloody ex.

"He wanted a change of scenery." River frowns looking back over to Niall and Landon.

"I'm guessing you want alcohol?"

"Yes please. Lots of it. And please can you sit and talk to me about stuff."

"Alcohol and wedding chat it is."

"Yes, lots of wedding chat. Please never leave." River laughs grabbing the whisky and a glass for Harry.

"Nolan's due a feed soon so I will have to stick with water." She waggles the whisky in Harry face as she walks past.

Harry takes one more look at Landon and Niall with Nolan before leaving the kitchen feeling like he left his stomach behind on the floor.

And if he spends most the night after that taking Niall apart with his mouth and then with his hands before fucking into him making him come for the third time, well that is simply because Niall deserves it and not because Harry is trying to make a point. Thank you very much.


	10. Chapter 10

Niall is many things but he is not stupid. At least he does not think he is.   
He knows Landon being here has got to suck for Harry.   
And if he didn't know then the way Harry was slamming things around as he got dressed in the bedroom certain gave it away.

Or maybe that he spent the majority of the night fucking Niall and practically growling in his ear that he was his mostly gave it away.

He certainly got his point across anyway. 

What he doesn't understand is why Harry's mood swings seemed to be aimed at him at the moment.   
And actually this was all happening before Landon arrived. Which is not good considering Landon managed to time his arrival perfectly smack bang in the middle of Harry and Niall not on the best of terms. 

Niall can't think of a time before the wedding that Harry was like this. It can't all be just because some arsehole made a comment about his age could it? And Niall had thought that was sorted, they had been really good for a few days. 

And now it's happening again. He was fine last night and now he is pissed off again.

"Did you invite Liam over for dinner when you saw him Tuesday?" Harry is standing with his back to Niall working on buttoning up his shirt. 

"No, sorry I forgot I will ask him today." Harry's back tenses and then he is shaking his head and turning to snatch his jumper from the bed. 

"Forgot or to busy cosying up to Zayn?" And this is exactly what Niall is getting annoyed at. Since when did Harry have a problem with his friendship with Zayn? If he did then there would definitely be problems between the two of them too. 

"What are you on about? Why are you acting like such a prat about me and Zayn suddenly? You don't normally care." Harry shoves his jumper on and starts fussing with his hair, purposefully not looking at Niall.

"Yeah well that was before." Niall narrowed his eyes arms crossing over his chest. 

"Before what? Before you let him fuck me. Because you don't get to be shitty about that." Harry laughs bitterly finally looking up at Niall. 

"Not because of that no, because you are right I let that happen because people only get to touch you when I say." Niall should probably be angry about that but it's true. A very true statement indeed. He is Harry's and Harry does get to say who touches him.

"I didn't have a problem until I realised he looks at you like you hung the fucking moon Niall. And now I have your ex fucking boyfriend in my house who looks at you exactly the same. And I trust you but I am allowed to be annoyed that you are surrounding yourself with people who clearly want to fuck you at the drop of a hat. So let me be annoyed." 

"Zayn? He doesn't look at me in any way." Harry picks his phone up from the side scrolling trough it before passing it to Niall.

"If you don't think he is in love with you then you're blind." Harry had brought up the photos sent to his email. Niall laughing with Zayn at the park and in the car. It's in the photos of them outside Rae's school that he sees it. The way Zayn looks at him when he has Rae in his arms. When Niall is turned away from Zayn, chatting to Rae as he carries her back to the car. He can't be in love with Niall. He is married and absolutely mad about Matt. That's love. This must be something different. 

"He just....Harry we are best friends he just enjoys me being with the kids is all. He doesn't love me, it's not possible." Harry just shrugs taking the phone back from Niall and slotting it into his back pocket. 

"It don't really matter anyway does it. I trust you and actually I trust him too, to not act on whatever he feels. It still sucks knowing he feels that way. And it really fucking sucks that Landon is here." 

"You don't have to he angry at me though Harry. I didn't ask him to come here."

"You asked him to stay. I'm not even angry at you so, sorry for making you think that. I'm just in a bad mood because it's all stressing me out. Can I please just be in a bad mood for a bit?" Niall swallows then nods. As long as he knows Harry is not angry at him personally he can be in what ever mood he wants. He still feels bad for not considering Harry's feeling when he asked him to stay so it's the least he can do. 

"I really love you, like pretty sure I could throw up with how much I love you." Harry laughs and it's like a bolt of happiness goes through Niall because his laugh is so lovely and his face relaxes and Niall is crazy about it all. 

"So romantic. Well when your throwing up all that love I will be right there mopping you up because I love you too."

"Enough to deal with my sick?" 

"Definitely, smell and all." Niall wraps himself around Harry, breathing in the smell of his soap and shampoo. 

Niall just hopes that once Harry settles with the idea of Landon being here things will go back to normal for them.   
Landon won't be here for too long anyway and really, what could go wrong in that time?

Zayn arrives a few moments later in a flurry off madness, him and the kids all wrapped up in their winter gear the kids looking like adorable marshmallows. Harry is in the kitchen making himself a drink before he leaves and Niall and Landon are sat in the living room watching the news. 

"Harry! Rae wanted to see you before school because she apparently loves you and not me which I don't get because I am the one the does like all the- who the fuck are you?" Landon has the same look on his face that most people get when coming across Zayn for the first time. Niall has to feel sorry for him really. 

"This is Landon, and Landon this is Zayn." 

"Landon?" Landon gets up smoothing down his jeans before holding his hand out towards Zayn.

"Yeah hi." Zayn blinks down at his hand like it's some kind of disease. 

"The Spanish guy?"

"Err, I think you mean Italian but I'm actually British I just live in Italy." Landon drops his hand back down. 

"Wait what? Harry!" Niall hears Harry huff before he rushes into the room work bag in hand. 

"What?" 

"What is this person doing here?" Landon looks over at Niall with his eyebrows raised. 

"Welcome to Zayn." Niall holds his hands out a big grin plastered on his face. 

"It's Landon. From Italy. Change of scenery and all that. Sleeping on our sofa. Hi kids." Rae runs out from behind Zayn's legs to follow Harry back into the kitchen. 

"London has hotels you know. Does Italy not have hotels? Where do tourist stay? It's very odd that you are here. As if you didn't text me as soon as he turned up Niall. Why are you here exactly?" Niall shakes his head getting up off the sofa.

"Zayn shut up, Landon ignore him he just does not like people."

"I like you. You are people. And Liam, Harry, Macy, River, Cassie, I quite like Bobby and Lisa. Then there is that man who brings me my art supplies. You know he is actually really nice and the other day he gave me this free sample of this really nice pastel-"

"We get the point love. He does not like new people that much. But he is actually a big teddy bear." Landon does not look anymore settled by this. Niall can tell he is trying to be polite, keeping a smile on his face but his eyes completely give him away. The scowl he is still receiving is a pretty bad one to be fair. If Niall did know Zayn as well as he did he would also be crapping his pants. 

"Right well OK. I'm just here on a holiday? Kinda. Niall asked me to stay so yeah. I did." Niall actually really admires the way Zayn manages to still look terrifying even with Elliott perched on his hip. 

He would feel bad for Landon but meeting the group is bound to be a tough one. Best to let him just have it. He was sure they would all get used to him pretty quick. There was no reason for them not too. 

"That's nice. Still don't really get why you are here? Who turns up on their ex's doorstep." Zayn snorts with laughter and looks at Niall like Landon is crazy. Like Niall should be laughing with him. 

"We are still friends so stop being a dickhead. Can you play nice for me please? Do you love me enough to do that." Zayn's face softens. 

"Well yeah I guess. Just I'm gonna be watching you and shit like that. I still think this is weird." Landon huffs out a laugh shooting Niall a look that is a mixture of relief while still being terrified. 

"I can deal with that." Zayn hums, looking him up and down.

"Come on Rae we have to go to school!" Rae comes running out the kitchen, a small smudge of brown on the corner of her mouth giving away the chocolate Harry had sneaked her in the kitchen. Zayn tutted wiping it away with his thumb.

"Say goodbye to uncle Niall and the weird man." Rae waved and blew Niall a kiss. 

"Bye princess have a good day at school." Niall leaned over the sofa to kiss her cheek that smelt very strongly of chocolate. 

"Bye Niall! Bye weird man." Landon laughed waving back at her. 

"Bye pretty lady." Rae beamed before skipping towards the door. 

Zayn gave Landon one more hard look before leaving. 

Landon let out a breath once the door clicked shut flopping down onto the sofa. 

"Man, he is intense." 

"Wait until you meet the others. I'm just gonna pop outside for a second." Landon falls back into the sofa as Niall slips on some shoes and grabs his coat before slipping out the front door. Zayn has just finished strapping Elliott in and tells Rae to sit nicely before closing the door and walking over to where Niall is stood waiting for him.

"What's with the creepy ex then? Is Harry OK with that?" 

"He will be, and Landon is not creepy so be nicer next time." Zayn rolls his eyes but Niall knows him well enough to know he will be better behaved from now on. 

"You want to talk about something?" Niall walks away from the house more, Zayn trailing behind him. He can see the kids in the car Elliott playing with a toy car while Rae watches him and Zayn. 

"Harry's been acting weird. He got sent these photos of me and you out on Tuesday, at the park and picking Rae up from school."

"Want the fuck? So someone was there. Niall that is really messed up." 

"I know and we can talk about horrible the whole thing is later because right now I want to talk about Harry tuning into a jealous arse over them." Zayn frowns glancing over to the house before stepping close to Niall. 

"What do you mean?" 

"Does Matt ever get funny with you after you have slept with someone else?" 

"No because why wound he? We both agreed and he was there. Do you not think Harry is dealing with what we got up to?" 

"No, I don't think so. He said it shocked him because we look like a family. And he thinks that.." Zayn frowns taking Niall's hand in his.

"Think what?" Niall is not sure if this is the best idea, but Harry had put the thought in his head now and Niall can't be around Zayn and not know.

"He thinks you are in love with me." He watched the movement of Zayn's throat as he swallows, his grip on Niall's hand tightens before he lets go, his hand falling to his side. 

"Oh." Niall had expected Zayn to deny it. To laugh and make a joke about how absurd it was for anyone to think that. Instead he looks like he has been caught. He looks guilty. 

"Zayn are you in love with me?" Niall's heart is slamming in his chest and Zayn is backing away from him and it's all wrong really. Harry can't be right. Harry is being over protective after seeing them have sex that's all. He can't be right.  
But Zayn is not answering and he still has that look on his face that Niall wants gone. 

"If you don't answer me then I will take it as a yes so please answer me." Niall sound firm and Zayn's face crumbles for a second before he forced it back to normal. He steps forward grabbing both sides of Niall's face and tilting his head down so he can press a kiss to his forehead, lips lingering for a moment and his thumbs both working in small gentle circles on his cheeks  Then he turns and walks back to the car and gets in without looking back at Niall again. 

Niall watches him drive away until the car goes around the corner and Niall knows that Zayn really is not about to stop and start laughing at the look on Niall's face and say of course he does not love him like that. 

Zayn is in love with him.  
How long has Zayn been fucking in love with him?

"You OK baby?" Niall jolts out of his thoughts as Harry comes out the front door, leaving it ajar for Niall to get back in.

"Yeah." Harry pulls Niall into a hug kissing the top of his head. 

"What did you come out here for?" Niall sighs burning his face into Harry coat.

"Just wanted to give Zayn a heads up about someone having photos of the kids." Harry kisses Niall's head again before gently pushing him back. 

"Is there anything you can do to stop fans from getting to personal?" 

"You still think it was just a fan?" Niall sighs rubbing at his face. He can't believe he still does not have Harry support on this being something more then an overbearing fan.

"Yeah I do. Makes the most sense. Best to not stress about it love, maybe get Sonya to put a message out about respecting your privacy and the kids." Niall just nods leaning up to kiss Harry. 

"Have a nice day at work. Going to miss you." Harry starts walking towards his car smiling over his shoulder at Niall. 

"Miss you too. Love you a whole lot." Niall waves and wait for Harry to get into the car and start the engine before he goes back inside. 

The TV is still playing the news and Niall can hear River in the kitchen and the shower running upstairs so he heads upstairs to get himself dressed and ready to show Landon some of the city. 

Xxxxx

"So what's the deal with you and Zayn? Thought you hated each other?" 

Niall and Landon are sat in a small cafe, greasy burgers sat in front of them and glasses of stupidly tall milkshakes. It had taken half an hour for Niall to convince him to have lunch here with him after he caught sight of the food being delivered to tables. Food he apparently thinks is a crime to charge people for. Eating out at crappy little cafes was hard work when your with a chief apparently.

"We did. Well no I don't think we did actually. Yes I hated him when I left, for what he helped do to me and Harry. Before that I think we had some kind of friendship. It was just built on some really unhealthy emotions that are no longer apart of our life's so it's now a better friendship. I love him to pieces." And he loves me. He is in love with me. Niall shakes the thought away, mouthing at the straw to his drink and sipping. 

"Ok, well that's cool I guess. Just not what I expected. Your pretty tight then? This whole group of friends you have. Look out for each other?" 

"We are like a family. We are all pretty busy most the time but we have each others backs. We are generally good at sussing out when someone is dealing with shit so that's good." Except for the fact he had no idea his best friend was falling in love with him. 

"They are all going to hate me being here."

"They are going to be curious about it and probably worried about how it's making Harry feel. They will settle down though so don't stress." 

"I hope so. I really want to use this time to really catch up with you, no hidden agenda I promise." Niall couldn't imagine Landon being interested in Niall like that ever again, not after the crap Niall put him through. 

"I know. So what do you want to do next?" 

"I don't know. Anywhere that you normally go?" 

"Not really. Spend most my time at home writing and working, go to the park with the kids sometimes. Proper boring life me." Landon chuckled shaking his head.

"Nah, nothing is boring with you. How about we just walk about? Window shop and then head home. Just mostly want to talk with you today." Niall agrees and after a small argument over who pays the bill that Niall wins, they both head back outside into the cold pulling their coats up around their necks. 

"So LA boy, you gonna fill me in on the writers lifestyle?" 

"Not much to fill in. I sit at my laptop, I get way more frustrated then any person needs to be and then I just have a book." Landon laughs nudging into Niall with his hip. 

"Just have a book. Come on! I saw you with your faced shoved in that notebook all the time are you really going to act like being published is no big deal? Mum was super proud by the way, going on about how you went of to LA to be all famous. The weird little blonde Irish boy." Niall thinks of Daisy. Thinks of the restaurant and the little life he had made for himself that he left behind because suddenly it didn't seem like paradise anymore when he so desperately needed to get away from the hurt look on Landon's face. 

"Yeah not really famous though am I? People in LA certainly were not that interested in me, don't even know why I settled there for so long." He does know. It was because he was hiding from the fact that the one place he needed to be was London but being to scared to go do it. 

"Well it's still pretty cool. Google your name and all this stuff comes up. Got some fan pages too." 

"You been checking up on me then?" Landon shrugs pulling his coat tighter around himself. 

"Maybe a couple of times. Missed your face and that ridiculously loud laugh of yours. Just missed you really. Everything sucked for a bit after you left." 

"Everything started sucking before I left." They fall silent after that. There is no way they can go this whole visit without talking about their mess of a relationship. Niall was rather gutless when he took the chance to just vanish off to a different country and not really deal with all the shit that came with a break up. 

Landon sighs looking up at the cloudy sky.   
"I understand why you needed the things you did. I don't think...I know you didn't mean to use me in that way. It was my own fault for letting myself fall in love when I knew you could never feel the same back."

"No Lan-" Niall grabs hold of his arm to stop him from walking, stepping back until they were no longer blocking the path. "- It was so wrong of me to do the things I done. Jesus how can you say any of it was your fault when I was the one asking to pretend you were someone else? I knew I was still in love with someone else so I should have been more considerate of what was bound to happen between us." Landon shook his head looking agitated.

"We don't need to talk about this. It's in the past, I'm over it and you're over it. I just want to keep things light yeah? So go on tell me more about what happened after you left." Landon started walking backwards away from Niall, hands shoved in his pockets and a dimpled grin on his face. 

Niall felt like the breakup of their relationship is something they should really talk about eventually. Maybe Landon was right though, they could keep things light for right now. 

Niall jogged to catch up with Landon, linking their arms together as he started telling Landon about the three years he spent living in LA. 

Xxxxxxxx

"Play me something." Landon strums the guitar on his lap, shaking his head at Niall. 

"Come on." Niall reaches his foot out to poke at Landon's leg. "Sing to me. You used to always sing." Landon batted Niall's foot away, waggling his eyebrows 

"I was seducing you that's why." Niall cackles, kicking out at his again. 

"Please." Landon sighed dramatically adjusting himself on the sofa. He narrowed his eyes at Niall before looking down at the guitar starting to play.

"Nailllll" Niall laughs throwing his cushion toward Landon's head, missing by miles.

"Niall has a nice smile." 

"I do." 

"He is looking rather glum" Niall giggles then pulls a sad face. 

"Because he has a big bum." 

"Hey!" Niall lifts his foot up shoving it into the side of Landon's face. 

"His foot really smells like something from a....well." 

"Terrible. Sing a proper song." Landon shakes his head again. 

"Nah. Only silly songs for you."

"That's mean. You are nasty."

"Your feet are nasty." Landon grabs Niall's ankle and yanks it sending him sliding down the sofa towards him. 

"Get stuffed, you love my feet." Niall waggles his toes around, screeching when Landon grabs at them. 

"They do look tasty." 

The sound of Harry coming home is drowned out by Niall's laughter and he stands by the door watching as Landon tries to bite Niall's feet, teeth snapping. 

"No, noooo fuck off you turd!" Harry drops his bag to the floor so he can slip his coat of and hang it on the hook by the door. 

"Rude. Don't forget I know all your ticklish spots Mr Horan." Harry frowns hating the thought of Landon knowing parts of Niall's body the same way that he does. He clear his throat, toeing his boots off.

Landon stops, dropping Niall's foot back onto the sofa while Niall scrambles to sit upright.

"Hi babe! Fun day at work?" Harry crosses over to the sofa leaning over the back to kiss Niall. 

Niall grabs hold of Harry's face, making the kiss longer before realising him. 

"Yeah it was, did you both have a good day?" Niall is stopped from answering by his phone ringing. He grabs it off the table pouting when he looked at the screen.

"It's Sonya, I'm gonna take this upstairs." Niall jumps up and jogs up the stairs leaving Harry alone with Landon who is draped over the top of the sofa watching Niall leave. 

"So where do you work Harry?" Harry eyes his guitar still perched on Landon's lap wanting nothing more then to snatch it away from him. That would make him look like a child so he resists. 

"I help teach a music class at a primary school." 

"Oh, that sounds cool. Must be great getting little kids into music, it's such an important thing i think." Harry just nods before making his way into the kitchen. 

There was a small part of him that had hoped he would come home from work today to find Landon had magically decided to actually leave. He knew that would be to good to be true. 

Landon comes into the kitchen behind him offering to make him a coffee.

"No thanks. We have some friends coming over soon, hope that's OK?" Landon just smiles and nods.

"Of course it is your house after all, just act like i'm not here." Harry would love to do that. He has a very strong feeling that Landon was going to make that impossible though. 

"He is different here." Harry raises his eyebrows leaning against the counter watching Landon make himself a drink.

"What do you mean?" Landon pours water into his mug before opening the fridge to grab the milk. 

"Just that he seems to have lost some of his glow." He pours his milk eye on Harry as he screws the lid back on. "He has this edge to him now that was never there before and I just though that being back here with you he would be even happier you know?" 

"No I don't know." Landon picks his drink up smiling sweetly at Harry. He wanted to punch him.

"Oh well, I guess you didn't see Niall back home. You would know what i'm talking about if you did. He is not as happy is all i'm saying. It's a shame, he deserves to be the happiest he possible can be." 

"I don't think spending just one day with him is enough for you to really know anything about his life here." 

"When it comes to Niall I think I know just about everything." He steps closer to Harry, face still holding the sweet innocent smile. "I know every inch of him don't forget. Its not just you who he has belonged to." Landon turns and walks out the room and seconds later Harry can hear the sound of him playing with his guitar again. Harry wants to go storming after him and scream at him to get out of his house and away from the things are are his. Instead he gets himself a glass of water and sits down at the table fist curled up so tightly his nails are digging into his skin. 

He had nothing to worry about. Niall loved him. Niall wanted to marry him. He had Niall and nobody else did. He knew all this but it still felt like he was holding onto Niall by just a small thread. 


	11. Chapter 11

Niall was perched on his desk, head tilted back with a pen balanced on his lip. His phone was next to him, Sonya on loud speaker still chatting away to him. She was going though his scheduled for after the book release party and he should probably be paying more attention but he knew she would type it all up from him later and also add it to his calendar. Plus it was actually all quite boring to listen to when Harry was downstairs and he could be kissing him instead. 

"I also got you into an event that is happening in Bristol on the 19th of December, I managed to get two guest passes too so you can take lover boy with you. Are you writing this down?"

"Yes of course." The pen falls from his face and hits the desk with a clatter. 

"Sure you are. Its an hour of signing and then i'm trying to set up a few interviews for after so it's an all day thing, Niall please write it down." The bedroom door opens and Zayn is poking his head inside. 

"Are you writing it down?" Niall clears his throat looking away from Zayn to grab his diary.

"Yes woman i'm now writing it down, 10th of November right?" 

"19th of December Niall."

"Gotcha." Zayn walks around the room prodding at things and generally being a nosey git. Sonya starts going on about other things Niall was supposed to be getting sorted but Niall was starting to zone out watching Zayn. 

He knew he was up here to talk about earlier and why he felt like he could talk to him about anything he was still a little nervous about it. He really did not want anything to change between them. 

Zayn yanks open a draw looking at the contents before looking over to Niall and waggling his eyebrows. He pulls out a set of handcuff twirling them around his fingers before dropping them back into the draw and pushing it closed and pulling the one below it open. He pulls out a pair of Harry's  boxers pinging them in Niall's direction. 

"I need you to fit in some social media time too, get the fans excited for the book. Can you do that for me?" Zayn bounds over to Niall sitting down on his desk chair and rolling it closer to him.

"Yeah sure, could probably do a couple of live chats." Zayn nudges Niall's legs apart and slots himself between them, elbows resting on his knees. 

"Alright then I think that is all. I don't feel like you paid attention to me at all so i'm just going to send you an email with it all." Niall rolls his eyes picking his phone up from the desk.

"Thanks love, enjoy the rest of your day." He hangs up dropping his phone back onto the desk.

"Hi." Zayn sighs moving back a little so Niall can slid of the desk.

"Hey, figured we need to talk." Niall nods moving to sit on the edge of the bed, Zayn wheeling the chair over to be closer to him. Niall can hear a lot of noise downstairs so figures Zayn is not the only one over.

"Who else is here?"

"Everyone. They all wanted to come scoop out the ex. Poor thing."  
"You think he is alright? I should probably be with him." Niall goes to stand up but Zayn puts his hands on his thighs pushing him back down. Niall looks down at him, eyes landing on a small bit of paint dried just under his hairline.

"You have been painting." Niall rubs at it with his finger until its gone. Zayn takes his wrist moving it away. It's tense, and things had never really been tense between the two of them before and Niall has a urge to make a joke or do something stupid to make it normal again. 

"Matt knows." Right, yeah he can totally have this conversation with Zayn.

"Are you two OK? Your not going to like split up or anything right?" 

"Ni."Zayn drops his head down to Niall's knees and a part of Niall wants to push him away but he also wants to bring him closer and it's so confusing. "Ni I have been in love with you for a really long time. Matt married me knowing I had feelings for you. I didn't think you were ever coming back and I knew you would never be with anyone but Harry. It's not something that is going to effect me and Matthew because I love him so much more. I love you Niall but if i had to choose I would choose him in a flash. This does not have to change anything between us."

"You should have told me, especially before we-you know, slept together." 

"I know, I know and I am sorry for that. I didn't think I would ever have to tell you, I didn't know it was obvious to anyone." Niall looks down at his hands, Zayn's own still curled around his wrist.

"Why? I mean- you love us both?"

"Yeah. It's different though. Matt is my person. With you it's different, it's there but it's not something I struggle with. You're my best friend and I just want to know if that is going to change." This was weird. So, so weird and a lot for Niall to get his head around.

It could be worse. Zayn could want Niall in a way he couldn't. It could split Zayn and Matthew up but clearly they coped with it.   
It obviously did not need to change their friendship. 

"Its a lot, and it's going to be this thing for a bit I think. It's not going to change anything though. As long as you're OK?" Zayn let's go off Niall's wrist to cup his cheek. 

"I'm fine. Happy, content all that stuff. I understand if you want to tell Harry." He will have too. He can't keep secrets from Harry. 

"OK. Good and yeah I will, he is already pretty convinced so he won't be surprised. Does Matt know that I know?" Zayn nods, thumb brushing over Niall bottom lip. 

"How was he OK with us having sex?" 

"He had no reason to not be. Plus he really likes to make me happy." Niall huffs out a laugh removing Zayn's hand from his face.

"I should probably go check that Landon is still alive." Zayn rolls the chair back standing up with Niall. 

"Yeah. Fucking hate him by the way, he needs to go." Niall punched him in the arm before pushing him towards the door. 

"You said you would be nice."

"Yes to his face, and I was. I smiled and shit. But behind his back I shall completely slag him off." Niall rolls his eyes closing the bedroom door as they leave.

"Such an idiot." Zayn stops them suddenly wrapping his arms around Niall's shoulder pulling him into a hug. 

"Promise we are alright and your not just saying that." Niall hugs him back pressing his face into his shoulder. 

"Promise." Zayn squeezes him a little tighter before turning his head to kiss Niall's cheek. 

"Let's go then. Think Louis is out for blood by the way."

"Oh great." 

When they get downstairs Landon is sat on the sofa surrounded by everyone and is looking very much like pray. 

Zayn goes straight over to Matt who tucks him into his side whispering something in his ear that has Zayn beaming and leaning up to kiss him. 

"So how long you planning on staying Landon?" Louis is stood directly in front of Landon, looking down at him with his arms crossed. Liam is behind him forehead creased in a frown. 

The girls are off to the side crowded around Nolan but all casting glances over to Landon every second. 

"Not really sure. Just going to play it by ear really. Want to see the sights." 

"Well we can all take you. Show you the bits worth seeing, avoid the tourists traps. Should only take a couple of days right guys." 

"Oh yeah for sure." Liam steps up next to Louis. "Definitely no more then a couple of days."

"Come on you two." Niall steps in moving to sit next to Landon.  
"Let's go easy on him yeah." 

"So did you come to London for the sights and then though, oh hey Niall lives here better go check that out, or did you come here for Niall and the sights were an added bonus?" Louis carries on completely ignoring Niall. Landon fish mouths for a moment, looking from Niall back to Louis. 

"I have always wanted to see London, but yeah Niall was a big reason why. Why are you so concerned about this?" 

"Oh I'm not concerned. Just curious." 

"Lou " Harry speaks up from where he is sat by Matt and Zayn looking more then fed up. "just chill mate." Louis turns to him 

"I am chill, just think Landon here should re-"

"Babe stop." Everyone stays quite looking between Louis and Cassie as they have some kind of silent conversation.

"Fine whatever." Zayn clears his throat pushing away from Matt.

"Look how about we order some food in, have a little celebration of Harry and Niall's engagement." Niall feels Landon relax next to him, probably feeling better with the change of subject. 

Harry gets up smiling around at the group. A smile that Niall can tell is as fake as they come. 

"Good Idea. Niall will know what i want won't you love. I'm just going to get some fresh air." 

"Want me to come with you?" 

"No, you stay with Landon." Niall watches Harry leave the room really wanting to follow him. He looks over to Liam who is looking as concerned as Niall feels. 

"Going for a ciggy." Louis follows after Harry, patting at his pockets looking for his lighter whist sending an impressively sassy look Landon's way.

X

"He has come here to get him back." Harry watches smoke swirl out of Louis mouth. For a second he wished he smoked, wished he could do something that could make him relax. He hates the taste though, and the thought of what it would do to his body. 

"I agree." Harry groans falling onto his back. The grass is cold but he can't really bring himself to care. 

"I'm going to lose him. I love him so much and i'm going to have to find a way to live without him."

"What the fuck are you on about?" Louis squints over at Harry like he as lost his mind. "Why the fuck would you be losing him?" Because he is not a twenty something, fun and interesting boy. 

"They have history and fucking chemistry and he is not on the wrong side of thirty and he lives in fucking Italy. Probably speaks Italian while having sex. Got really nice hair." 

"Oh my god." Louis takes a drag from his cigarette, shaking his head in disbelief.

"You think they have the history? Jesus Harry you and Niall went trough hell and back to be where you are now. You both spent years apart and still managed to be together. They don't even have chemistry I bet. Just friends mate, like how he is with Zayn and Liam I reckon." Harry lets out a breath.

"Zayn is in love with Niall too. That is two people Lou. Two people who suit him more then me." Louis stubs out his cigarette. 

"Is that you guessing or do you know this for a fact?"

 

"A fact. Don't tell me you don't see the way he look at him." 

"Well yeah, he has always been like that though. Thought maybe he fancied him a little, did not think he loved him." Harry turns onto his side shuffling closer to Louis to try and get some of his warmth. 

"I can just feel myself losing him. We keep fighting and everything just feels so strained and then Landon turned up and its like walking on eggshells cause I don't want to piss Niall off while he is here because it would be like pushing him towards Landon even quicker."

"He's just asked you to marry him Harry. He loves you. Not Landon or Zayn or fucking whoever. You are literally his whole world." Harry doesn't know if he believe that anymore. He used to be so sure that Niall loved him. So sure that they were forever. Now he is not so sure if Niall feels like that about him anymore. Niall loves him, yes. He just proposed so of course he does, but does he love him enough that he would pick him over someone like Landon.  

"Just don't let this come between the two of you. Forget Landon and what him and Niall used to be to each other. Show the idiot how much you and Niall love each other and i'm sure he will soon fuck off with his tail between his legs. If not then we can just scare him away, he shit himself tonight and that was nothing. He wont be a problem Harry, not if we have anything to do with it." Harry loves Louis.

"Never go away on holiday again."

"You sent me away. Got yourself in a right state hey." Harry nods, pouting. That's exactly how everything felt right now. A right big fucking state. 

xxxxxx

The bedroom door slams shut behind Harry and both him and Niall wince waiting to see if they woke Nolan.

"It's fine. Naked, get naked now." Harry grabs at Niall's top helping him to pull it over his head, instantly attaching his lips to his collar bone.

"Been wanting to fuck you all night, too many fucking people." Niall moans, head falling back as Harry kissed over his neck hands working on undoing his jeans. Niall was already rock hard in his pants and so ready to have Harry inside him. 

Harry pulled his jeans down, dropping to his knees to mouth at his erection as he helped Niall step out of them. 

"Get on the bed, on your knees." Niall stumbles to the bed, eyes dark and breath coming out raggerd as he clumsily takes his boxers off before getting on his knees. Harry take a moment to look at Niall, pushing the heel of his hand into the bulge in his jeans before getting the lube out of the draw. He throws the bottle on the bed eyes still on Niall, taking in the muscles tensing in his back and the curve of his arse as he walks over to is dresser. 

"Gonna cuff you baby." Niall's breathing judders then he nods already moving to place his hands behind his back as Harry gets the cuffs out. 

"Such a good boy." Niall whimpers, head falling forward as Harry moves back behind him.

"Let me know if its too tight." He places the metal around Niall's wrist, making sure his shoulders look comfortable before he secured them. 

"Harry." Harry shushes him, kissing across his shoulders then gentle pushing him forward until his chest is pushed into the bed. 

"Going to take care of you baby." Harry undresses slowly, enjoying the way Niall starts to squirm when he get impatient. Harry is so hard and so turned on that his head is a little fuzzy with it. 

He places his clothes down neatly to the floor before picking up the lube and spreading some onto his fingers. 

"Your shoulders hurt?" Niall moans, shoving his face into the bed. Harry reaches forward with his clean hand, grabbing a fistful of Niall's hair yanking his head back up.

"Shoulders?" Niall gasped, blinking rabidly.

"Fine. They are fine, please just fuck me." Satisfied Harry lets go off him letting his head fall back to the bed and shoves a finger into him. Niall moans loudly, pushing his arse back into Harry's hand. Harry loves it when Niall gets desperate, when he can make him lose control so easily. 

"That's it baby, you fuck yourself on my fingers. Good boy." Harry slips a second finger in, biting down hard on his lip as he watches Niall rock back into them. 

"More." Harry adds a third  his other hand spread over Niall's back feeling the muscles ripple as he moves. He was going to end up coming far too soon if Niall carried on being this bloody responsive to him. 

"Cock. I want your cock, please Harry. Fuck please." Harry removes his fingers, wiping them on the bed sheets before grabbing the lube again. 

Harry slicks himself up, watching Niall's wrist twist in the cuffs knowing he already desperately wants to touch himself. He nudges him forward climbing onto the bed pulling Niall's arse up in the air a little more then swoops down to lick a strip from his balls to his rim. 

"Fuck!" Niall lurches forward, face falling into the bed as Harry works his tongue over him quickly. 

"Shit, shit, yes oh god Harry! oh, oohh god." Harry pulls back and Niall whines at the lose. 

"Always taste so good." Harry rubs his thumb over Niall's hole, pushing it past his rim slightly before gripping onto his cock and lining himself up. 

"Love you." He lifts Niall's head up gently so he can turn him enough for a kiss, then pushes into Niall slowly letting him feel the slide. Niall's mouth falls slack against Harry's lips until he is just swallowing Niall's moans. 

"You feel so good baby. So fucking tight and perfect for me. Made for me Niall, you were made for me." Niall groans, eyes fluttering. Harry grips onto Niall's waist, letting him have a moment to adjust to him before pulling out until just the head of his cock is nestled inside Niall. He teases Niall for a bit, pushing back in just the smallest amount before pulling back out again until Niall is almost sobbing into the blanket. 

"Please, please, please." Harry closes his eyes and takes a steadying breath to make sure he does not come then and there just from the sound of Niall begging him. Once he has settled himself he tightens his hold on Niall and slams all the way back in. 

Niall cries out, back arching and wrist straining in their restraints. If he was worried about waking anyone before he certainly did not care anymore as he slammed into Niall again and again the sound of his hips smacking into Niall's arse completely lost in the sounds Niall was making. 

Harry pulled his cheeks apart a little, brushing the tip of his finger around where his cock was pushing into Niall. Niall's body was twisting and arching, his face now completely pushed into the bed as he mouthed at the blanket trying to quite himself down. 

Harry closed his eyes, the feeling of being inside Niall, so warm and soft and so perfect that he was already getting close. 

"I'm gonna come soon, fuck baby so close." He tangles his hand in Niall's hair again and pulls him up until he can reach around to wrap a hand around Niall's cock. He feels so hard and wet in Harry's fist that he thinks Niall must have been pretty close too. It only take a couple of tugs then Niall is coming, shouting out Harry's name as he shots over his fist and the bed. Harry fucks into him a couple more times then he is coming, biting down on Niall's shoulder as he spills into him.

"Oh god yes Niall." Harry's body jolts another wave of come leaking out as he slowly pulls out of Niall, come leaking out and dripping down to his leg. Harry runs his thumb over his and pushes some back into Niall feeling his shiver at how sensitive he feels. 

"You ok?" He presses the little button on the handcuffs to release them, Niall letting out a sigh as he straightens his arms out. 

"Yeah i'm good. That was amazing." Harry helps Niall onto his back, letting out a rather pitiful moan when he sees the amount of come splattered over his stomach.

"You made so much mess, all over the bed and my hand too." Niall smiles, eyes drooping as Harry climbs off the bed to grab a t shirt off the floor to wipe his hand on before mopping up Niall.

When he climbs back onto the bed, Niall wraps his arms and legs around him pressing soft little kisses to his chest.

"Thank you. Love you. Made me come so much, it felt so good." Harry runs his hands over Niall back, wet with sweat and feels him go slack against him.

"Love you too. Want me to get you a drink before you fall asleep?" Niall nods, reluctantly letting go off Harry so he can get off the bed to pull some clothes on. 

"One day we will live alone again and I can walk around naked." Niall chuckled rolling onto his back to watch Harry walk to the door.

"I like when you do that. Like when you can fuck me all over the house too." Harry groans at the mental picture that sends to his head, his cock twitching as he thinks about bending Niall over the sofa and fucking into him.

"Jesus Ni, gonna get me ready for another round if you're not careful." Niall smirks stretching out across the bed.

"Hurry up with that drink and maybe we can." That, that sounds like a plan Harry can get on board with. He blows Niall a kiss, who pretends to catch it and slaps it on his butt, then slips out the room moving quietly past River's room. 

He passes Landon asleep on the sofa and goes into the kitchen, keeping the light off so he does not disturb him. 

He fills a glass, drinking it himself before filling it back up again for Niall. He turns round letting out a yelp water sloshing over the glass and onto the floor.

"Bloody Christ Landon, you scared the crap out of me I thought you were asleep." He places his hand over his chest, feeling his heart slamming. 

"Sorry, thought you heard me." Harry huffs and steps around him not really wanting to deal with him when he has a very naked Niall upstairs ready for round two. 

Landon reaches out and grabs hold of Harry's arm yanking him back slightly.

"I don't know if your trying to make a point by fucking him as loudly as possible but the only thing your proving to me is that I used to make him scream louder then you ever could." Harry yanks his arm out of Landon's grip, white hot anger shooting through him. What the fuck is this idiots deal. Harry moves forward until they are practically chest to chest, glaring down at him.

"I'm not trying to make any point to you and nothing you say will have any effect on me Landon. Even if you did make him scream louder it would have only been because he was thinking of me. Or did you forget that you were never enough for him? Don't push your luck with me because when it comes to that boy I will not think twice about ripping you to pieces so back the fuck off." Harry steps back then turns and leaves the room before he does something stupid like punch his stupid head in. 

If he thinks he can take Niall from him then he has quite the fight coming his way. 


	12. Chapter 12

"This line is massive." 

"It's London mate. All lines are massive and everything cost too much." Niall leans back into Harry closing his eyes and enjoying the warmth coming off him. Even wrapped up in his hat and scarf Niall could feel the chill hitting him. Harry was warm so his plan was to just stay attached to him for however long it takes to reach the front. 

"Did you know the London Eye can take up to 800 people at once?" Its the first time Zayn has spoken today. He had been putting an awful lot of effort into making himself look busy with Elliott, who was strapped to his chest and had been rather happy since their arrival. Every now and then Niall will see him glance nervously at Harry obviously trying to work out if Niall has told Harry about his feelings for Niall yet. Which you know, he will. 

"That's a lot of people." Liam looks up at the eye, squinting as he looks at the capsule at the top. 

"I bet that's how many people are in this line." Harry laughs into the side of Niall's head, pressing a kiss there. 

"Also did you know that there are 32 capsules but they are numbered 1-33 because they skipped number 13 as they thought it would be bad luck." It's Landon spouting out facts this time, face buried in a London guide book.

"Man it took seven years to build this, that's crazy. And it is always moving at the speed of 26 cm per second which gives you time to get one." Niall catches Louis roll his eyes, flicking his cigarette on the floor. 

"Fascinating." 

"I can't wait. I have always thought it looked so cool, you guys must have been on it loads!" 

"No, not really." Niall says, shifting his weight to one foot. "Only once for me, think Liam went a second time on a date with Macy."

"Me and Lou have been on four times." 

"Just once for me. Elliott's first time though right Buddy. Daddy is going to take you up high in the sky like a bird." Niall catches Zayn's eye and grins getting a shy one back in return. 

"Zayn I hope you know that you're getting everyone around you pregnant just by standing there with him strapped to you. Including me." 

"Awww, well congrats Lou. Gonna be a great Daddy." Louis smirks, waggling his eyebrows.

"I'm such a good Daddy. Treat all the baby boys and girls right" 

"For fuck sake Lou. You're not normal."

"What I am Lima bean is bored. Fucking British people with our fucking lining up for everything." Niall turns in Harry's arms, resting his forehead against his chest. 

"You OK?" Niall nods, hair making a scratching sound as it rubs against the material of Harry's coat. 

"Yep, looking forward to having a go on this with you." Niall tugs down Harry scarf so he can press his lips to the skin there. 

"Hmmm, me too." Niall keeps kissing at Harry's neck, lips parting so he can bite down a little before swirling his tongue over the area. Harry shivers hands spreading out over his back. 

"Babe, you're about five seconds away from giving me a boner in front of Liam." Niall kisses his laugh into Harry's skin before moving up to kiss along his jaw. 

"Would he a waste of a boner." He feels Harry smile and can't help the grin that spreads across his face too. 

"The biggest waste." Niall hums going up on his tip toes to kiss just behind Harry's ear. 

"Wish you could fuck me up there. Pin me to the wall and just fuck into me. Wonder if people would be able to tell what we were doing. What you can do to me." Harry groans head dropping down. 

"There is a lot of like glass. Very very glassy, don't think we would get away with that."

"Ooo glassy. So everyone would definitely be able to see what you do to me. Could press me to the glass so everyone could see how fucked out I am." Harry pouts down at his crotch. 

"And there it is." Niall giggles pressing himself closer to Harry so he can feel the hardness against his leg. 

"OK love birds, the rest of us had to come here without our other half's so if you could tone it down that wound be splendid." Niall ignores Louis and busies himself with working his tongue into Harry mouth. It not his fault the girls decided today was the day they where going to help River move into Niall's flat. Also not his fault that Matt was some super important therapy person who had to work lots of hours. 

"Step away from each other guys." Harry laughs, pulling away from Niall. 

"I think it's in everyone best interest that Niall does not step away from me right now."

"Eww, dad! Why? Why is this my life." Niall laughs biting down and tugging on Harry's bottom lip. 

"Sorry Liam. I just can't get him to stop. Naughty really." Niall turns back round in Harry's arms so he is facing everyone again, grinning at Liam. 

"We are moving guys." Zayn gets everyone's attention back on the queue and they all shuffle forward.

"Well that was about the most exciting thing that happened in the last twenty minutes." Louis grumbles getting another cigarettes out his cost pocket.

"Want one Zayn?"

"I have a one year old strapped to my chest, what do you think?"

"Ain't he asleep."

"Yeah, he will still breath it in idiot. Please don't have kids." 

"Hey Ni." Landon looks up from his book waving Niall over. Harry squeezes Niall's waist before releasing him.   
"Do you think we can do the Harry Potter walking tour?"  
"Yeah sure, bloody love Harry Potter." Landon smiles, lowering the book.  
"I remember. Used to watch it all the time didn't we." 

Louis glances over to Harry and rolls his eyes not so discreetly holding his fist up in a wanker motion. Harry bites down on his lip to stop himself from smiling. 

"Lines moving." Louis tuts, fag hanging loosely between his lips. 

"Ya know Zayn, I'm so glad you came. I'm sure we wound still be all the way back there not noticing that the line moved. Thank you for having eyes when the rest of us must not." 

"You are so fucking rude when your bored."

"Your so fucking.... something."

"Nice." 

"I would pay so much money to having Elliott's first word be fucking." Zayn glared at Liam.

"He had said his first word Loser."

"No he has not! Nobody told me about this. What the hell did he say?"

"He said Liam Payne is a fucking Loser."

"You sure he didn't say my daddy is a prick." 

"Guys." Niall looks over his shoulder finger shoved in Landon's guide book. "We are not in high school anymore." 

Louis starts laughing, lips puckered out in an attempt  to keep his cigarette in his mouth. 

"What?" Niall asks, eyebrows raised. 

"When you were in high school you were fucking Harry and sometimes that makes me laugh." Liam sigh loudly.

"I need to hang out with different people, people that don't forget Harry is my dad and therefore don't mention his sex life."

"Lines moving." Niall laughs loudly, body bumping into Landon's as they moved. 

"We should be next."

"Thank fuck for that." 

XXX

Harry grips onto the rail leaning forward until his nose bumps into the glass and looks down. There is something he has always loved about being really high off the ground, maybe he was a bird in a past life. 

"Hey Harry." Zayn speaks softly coming up behind him. Elliott is out of his sling now, stumbling next to Zayn holding tightly onto his fingers. 

"Hey, Elliott having fun?" 

"Yeah think so. He hasn't cried yet so that's good." Harry smiles, crouching down so he is level with Elliott holding his hands out for him. Elliott gives him a slobbery grin and let's out a squeal as he lets go off Zayn to do a half run half fall into Harry's arms. Harry straightens up again, Elliott tucked into his hip.

"Look little dude, can you see all the buildings. Got the Big Ben over here." Harry points, grinning big when Elliott actually follows where he is pointing and claps.

"Bus!" Harry laughs kissing Elliott's cheeks.

"Yeah there are lots of buses down there. Also lots of famous Landmarks too!" Zayn snort leaning against the railing. 

"Maybe bring him back in a few years if you want him interested in them." 

"Hmm, Maybe." Elliot starts wiggling so Harry lets him down and they both watch him slowly make his way over to Louis and Liam who are laying down on the chairs in the middle of the capsule. He flops onto Louis stomach, who makes a big show of looking annoyed before tugging Elliott up to sit on him.

"Harry, are we OK?" Harry turns back to Zayn who is twiddling his hands together and looking nervous. 

"Why would we not be?" Zayn frowns down at his feet before shrugging.

"No reason I guess. How about you and Ni? You both doing alright since Landon's been here?" Harry looks over to where Niall and Landon are standing. Niall is pointing out different things, hands moving about as he talks to Landon about it all. They are standing close, sides touching and every now and then Landon will reach round to draw Niall's attention to something else and Harry can see him edging even closer each time. 

"We are fine. I guess its been a little tense because he knows i'm not happy about Landon being here and he does not see why I shouldn't be. Nothing major though and i'm guessing he will be going home sometime soon." Niall laughs loudly, head falling back as he slaps Landon across the chest. Landon looks down at him smiling and the look on his face is one that Harry imagines is on his own when he looks at Niall laughing like that. 

"I don't trust him. Odd init? For him to just come here like this, with no contact before hand. No warning that he will be near by. Creepy. Plus you both just got engaged, how does he not feel like he is imposing?" 

"I don't trust him either, not in the slightest. If i could make him leave without upsetting Niall then I would. I think Niall feels like he owes him ya know, for the way he just left him to go to LA. Like things got shit and he just ran without really making it up him. It's making him really sensitive to Landon's feeling. We upset Landon then we upset Niall." They both fall silent, watching Landon and Niall as they talk and laugh. Landon getting a touch in whenever he can, Niall completely oblivious to what he is doing. 

"He is manipulated easily." Harry's head snaps back to Zayn, eyebrows furrowed together.

"What?" Zayn sucks his bottom lip into his mouth, shifting from foot to foot.

"S'like with me. It was easy to manipulate Niall because he just accepts people and he trusts easily. It did not take much to make him think what I was offering him was the best option, for him and everyone around him. I think Landon would know him enough to know that Niall is like that. He is going to use that. I really think you need to keep a close on on them." Harry looks back over at Niall. That thought terrified Harry. Zayn was right, Niall did trust people and he was too kind and too forgiving and too everything. The thought of Landon knowing to use that to get Niall to do exactly what he wanted him to do scared Harry so much. 

Landon needed to go, but he could not get rid of him without risking hurting his own relationship with Niall. He would just see that as Harry not trusting him and that could do some real damage. Maybe the only thing he could do was grin and bare it and just keep as close an eye as possible until Landon got the hint that Niall did not want him and he left again. 

"Go stand with them Harry, don't give him to many chances to be on his own. Don't let him get into Niall's head." Harry nods then makes his way over to Niall and Landon feeling so unnerved that he struggles to keep up with the conversation Niall starts as soon as he reaches them. He settles for wrapping his arms around Niall as tightly as he can get away with and pushing his face into the back of his head, breathing him in as a reminder that he is very much here and his. 

xxxx

"You all want to come back to ours for a cuppa?" Harry asks everyone as they are loading themselves back into the cars. 

Louis and Liam both shout out a yes, getting in the front of Louis car as Zayn straps Elliott into the back.

"Can you come Zayn?" Niall questions hoovering by the passenger door of Harry's car. Him and Zayn had been a little off-kilter all day, which is to be expected after everything. Niall thought it pretty much sucked though so was keen to just forget about Zayn's feelings towards him-because really what did they matter when Zayn loved Matt more and had no desire to actually be with Niall- and just get back to how they should be. 

Zayn wiggle back out the car, leaning on the roof.

"I guess I could, Rae has after school club today so she don't need picking up until four."

"Good, sorted. Meet back at ours then." Zayn pulls at his lip, then nods getting into Louis car. 

Niall jumps into Harry's, smiling over his shoulder at Landon who was already strapped in and back to looking at his book. Niall has never seen anyone who was so fascinated by London before, it was quite adorable. 

"We good to go?" Niall nods, reaching across to rest his hand in Harry's lap as he puts the car into gear and pulls out of the parking space following behind Louis.

"Hey Ni?" Niall hums turning to smile at Harry.

"Mega in love with you." Niall's face brightens up, his grin nearly from ear to ear.

"Super mega in love with you." Harry glances in his mirror in time to see Landon send him a glare and grins to himself. 

x

"So Landon, how old were you when you moved to Venice?" 

They are all gathered in Niall and Harry's living room, cups of tea in laps as Elliott runs around them all spreading biscuit crumbs in every possible place he can. 

"Oh um, when I was about six. Mum and Dad just got divorced and she got quite a bit of money from selling the house and the restaurant they owned together. She had a few friends in Venice so took us there to start fresh." Louis plucks a biscuit out of Elliott's hand as he passes, dipping it into his tea before taking a large bite. Zayn scowls at him passing Elliott another. 

"That must have been hard, being away from your dad?" 

"Not really. I don't really remember him and he treated my mum pretty badly so I never had any interest in him."

"Were did you move from?" Niall wants to tell Louis to stop with all the questions but knows it would be pointless. He was like a dog with a bone when it came to this kind of thing, especially when he thought he was protecting Harry. 

"Just a little village in Suffolk, don't remember it obviously. Venice is the only place I remember."

"Do you speak Italian?"

"Yes and Venetian."

"There is a difference?"

"Well Venetian is a romance language and spoken by the northeast Italians specially in the veneto region of Italy but Italian is spoken every where in the country." Louis sips his tea, eye narrowed. Niall can practically hear his brain whirling as he things of what to ask him. 

"So how did Niall manage to stumble across you then?" Liam shifts back in the chair, foot moving up to rest on his knee as he looks between them. Landon just keeps smiling, probably just please that the questions are not to invasive.

"He meet my mum first actually. I believe he helped her after her bag of shopping split." Niall nodded and Harry smiled over at him because of course his Niall stops to help people.

"They got to talking after that-"

"I was so relived to find someone who spoke fluent English because I had spent the whole day getting so mixed up and I was so tired."

"Yep, and we had a spare room that mum rented out a few times a year so she offered him somewhere to sleep and some food. Then he just got settled. Mum offered him some shifts at the restaurant in return for the room and food. I think after all the traveling alone he was enjoying being looked after, having that family setting." Niall nods to confirm. That was exactly what he loved most about staying with Daisy, Beth and Landon. It was like being back home, with his mum, without actually having to go back home and face everyone. 

"Cute." The fact that Niall and Landon had at some point starting sleeping together and then got into a relationship was like the elephant in the room and Niall found himself staring at Louis waiting for him to mention it. Surprisingly he keeps his mouth closed for once.

"So you taught Niall how to cook then Landon? Guess we should thank you for that, we have gotten fed well by him." Liam is clearly trying to keep the atmosphere upbeat and it works for the others, but not for Niall and Landon. Teaching Niall how to cook was how they got so close. How they went from just working then Niall vanishing off to his room, to talking and laughing and learning everything about the other, then lingering touches and looks until eventually it was tearing at clothes and not even waiting to get upstairs before they started fucking. 

"Yeah, that was me." Landon looks down at his mug, finger running around the rim before he lets out a small laugh looking up at Niall.

"Terrible cook before then. Terrible member of staff altogether really. Spent most the time sat with Beth gossiping about fit tourist boys or burying his face in his notebook." 

"There were a lot of fit tourist." Harry pouts making Zayn chuckle into his hand.

"Pretty sure mum would have had him out on his arse if he had not charmed his way into the family after about a day."

"She proper loved me." Landon looked over at Niall, smiling when they made eye contact.

"Yeah she did, still does. Everyone loved you, should come back. See them all they would be so excited." 

"Oh especially Mattia" They both burst out laughing, the other four watching them confused. Louis glances over at Harry who was watching the pair with a deep frown on his face.

"Oh come on! Mattia has been coming into the restaurant everyday for years! Always orders the same thing because that is what makes him happy!" Niall shakes his head, leaning forward.

"No, No! It's what makes him boring. I am pretty sure he loved me switching his order about everyday. Bet it was the most excitement he had for ages."

"Definitely not, there is a reason that man got so jolly at you're leaving party. He could not wait to see that back of you, gone back to ordering his normal the second you left."

"oh no really, I asked Beth to keep up with my work."

"She is too scared. She only done stuff like that when you were there to egg her on. Mum nearly killed her when you convinced her to change out all the sugar for salt." Niall's laugh turned into a loud cackle, leaning over the chair more until his head is bumping into Landon shoulder. 

"Not all, just the one. She loved it, waiting to see who would pick it up!" 

Zayn looked nervously between everyone pulling Elliott closer to him like he expected them to all suddenly exploded.   
Louis is glaring daggers at the two reminiscing while Harry looked like a lost puppy. Liam seem just as weary as Zayn did, eye flicking from Niall to Louis. 

"Beth sounds nice." Is Zayn attempt at breaking the tension and pulling Niall and Landon out of their own little world. 

"Oh god she is great." Niall moves away from Landon, so Zayn counts that as a win because Harry relaxes slightly and Louis face looks slightly less murdery. "She was thirteen and obsessed with the idea of being a director so she was always filming people. She was convinced she was going to direct the film to my future book. She was like having a little sister so it was really cool to get her into all the pranks."

"She tried to teach Niall Italian in return but it was a massive fail" Niall tutted looming offended. 

"Umm excuse you I learnt the necessities. Buongiorno. Buon pomeriggio. Landon fa schifo." 

"Oh, I fancied you for a second then Niall" Liam flicks Louis ear. 

"You get a man crush too easily. He only said good morning, good afternoon and?" 

"Landon sucks. Beth thought that was pretty important." Louis grinned.

"I agree." Landon ignores Louis and goes back to just focusing on Niall. 

"So out of all she taught you, you think those are the necessities? No wonder she gave up." 

"You close to your sister then?" Louis asks. A look of annoyance flashes across Landon's face, long enough that Louis catches it making him smirk. Landon turns his attention back to the group.

"Yeah. We didn't have many friends growing up because we done our schooling online and helped out mum a lot, she is my best friend."

"She must miss you then. You will probably want to be getting back to her soon yeah?" Landon stares at Louis for a moment, eyes narrowing before answering him.   
"I miss her yes, but she is an adult so she does not need her big brother rushing back to her." Landon is starting to turn back towards Niall, clearly wanting to keep the conversation between just the two of them as much as possible. 

"Who taught you to cook? Did you go to collage?" 

"No. I learnt as I grew up, the chef at the restaurant was like family so he taught me everything. When he passed away I took over, taught myself some more stuff." 

"So who's doing your job while you're here?" 

"My mum will do some, she has friends that will do what she can't." 

"So she is working extra hard while your here then?"

"Lou, what's your problem?" Louis head snaps towards Niall, sweet smile on his face.

"Nothing Niall. I'm just interested in your-friend." Zayn gets to his feet, pulling Elliott up with him and kicking at Louis legs.

"I need to go get Rae, give me a lift please Lou." Louis hesitates looking over at Harry who is clutching his tea with one hand the other tugging at his lip. 

"OK. I will give you a call later yeah Haz. Today was fun lads. You coming too Liam?" Liam nods placing his mug onto the table letting Louis pull him up. 

"See ya later." Zayn waves pulling the door open leading them out. 

It's quite after they leave. Landon shakes his head then gets up.

"Still OK for me to have the bedroom?" Niall clears his throat.  
"Yeah of course. No point you being on the sofa now it's empty."  
"Thanks." He goes upstairs leaving Niall and Harry alone. 

"Louis needs to stop being so rude. Landon has done nothing to Louis, or you." Harry huff standing up to start collecting everyone's empty mugs. 

"I will have a word with him." Niall watches him leave the room, mugs hanging from his fingers, shoulders slumped. 

Xxxxx

Niall switches all the lights off downstairs, double checks all the door are locked then says a goodnight to Landon before going into his and Harry's room.

Harry is yawning while wiggling out of his clothes until he is completely naked before falling into bed. 

Niall closes the door with a soft click, walking over to stand by the side of the bed looking down at Harry. 

"Cave of truth?" Harry rubs at his face. He looks stressed, Niall hates seeing him look stressed.   
"You gonna get naked."   
"I can get naked yes." Harry bites down on his lip then nods.  
"Then yes please." 

Cave of truth was a ridiculous thing that Harry had come in with a month after they had gotten back together. He had been twitchy around Niall for a while until one night Niall finally snapped and asked him what was going on. They had been in bed at the time and Harry had shoved the blanket over both their heads and demanded that anything said under the blanket had to be forgotten about as soon as the blanket was removed.   
Niall had thought he was being an idiot but agreed. They spent the next two hours talking about things they had both been too scared to talk about before. Afterwards when Harry was asleep in his arms Niall knew they were going to be fine for the rest of their lives. 

Niall pulls all his clothes off then climbs into bed instantly pressing himself to Harry as they cover themselves. 

Niall blinks in the darkness until he can just make out Harry's face. Niall reaches up to run his fingers across his jaw and up to his cheek, pressing his thumb into the area his dimples pop out when he smiles. 

"Can I go first?" He feels Harry nod. 

"You were right about Zayn. He is in love with me." Harry let's out a breath, gripping onto Niall's side and pulling him closer to him pushing his legs through Niall's. 

"It's not going to be a problem Harry. He doesn't want to be with me or anything, he loves Matt. It's not like the love he has for him, or the love we have. And there is no feelings what so ever on my side. It changes nothing." 

"I just-" Harry pauses, wiggles down the bed so he can rest his head on Niall's chest, searching for his hands to link their fingers together. "- I just feel so fucking scared because Zayn and Landon, they are both like all my insecurities  wrapped up in a person." 

Insecurities? How had Niall never heard about this before? Niall can't even think what Zayn or Landon could have that Harry didn't. He was just so much more. 

"I don't- what insecurities darlin'? Why are you scared?" 

"It's just that they are so much younger, your age. And they make you laugh so much and Zayn has the kids and Landon has this past with you and I feel like I am so close to losing you. Like I'm holding on by the tips of my fingers and your slipping. They would be better for you. Landon would be so much better for you and I hate that I have to fight for you." Niall pulls the blanket down grabbing Harry's face and tugging him back up.   

"Hey. Hey." He holds Harry's face close to his, noses pushing together. "There is no fighting for me. You will never have to fight for me because I am yours and I will always be yours. I only want you, Jesus Christ Harry how can you even let yourself think losing me is a possibility. You are all I have wanted since i was sixteen." He lays Harry down on his back, pushing his legs apart so he can settle between then laying himself on top of Harry, getting as close as he possibly can to him. 

"I don't care about age Harry, it's just a stupid number. I only care about you and how much love I have for you and how you are the person that completes me, makes me whole and so, so happy." He lifts Harry's hand up, holds it between their faces so they can see both their rings together. 

"I asked you to marry me, I want to marry you. Nobody, nobody can take me from you because nobody else can be you." Harry is breathing loudly and there are tears in his eyes and it makes Niall feel so useless because he knows his words are not enough to remove all the doubt in Harry's mind. Niall leans down to kiss the corner of Harry's eyes, tasting the wet salty tears gathering there.

"I'm not OK with Zayn being in love with you." 

"Understandable love. It's a little weird for me too. I'm hoping things will stay the same between us all though." Harry closes his eyes, a tear rolling down that Niall quickly moves to wipe away.  

"I'm not OK with Landon being here either." Niall sighs dropping his head to Harry's. 

"I'm sorry you feel that way. You trust me  right?" Harry nods wiping at his eyes with the back of his hand. 

"I do. It's just such a horrible feeling when it's like everyone is trying to get you. You're mine." Niall pressed his lips to Harry's in a hard kiss, like he could make Harry feel all the love he has for him. 

"I am yours." He speaks against his lips, Harry's breath ghosting between them.  
"I am yours. All yours. I belong to you and nobody in the world could have me. I love you so fucking much. Please, please don't think it's a possibility baby. Please." 

"OK." Harry grabs the back of Niall's head pushing him closer, kissing him again and again. "I will try. I love you too. Don't want you to ever leave." 

Niall let's Harry kiss him until his lips are sore then he kisses down his body before reaching over to grab their bottle of lube. 

He opens Harry slowly, kissing at his shoulders, up his neck, around his ear.

"Gonna take care of you baby." Harry gasps and clings on to him, legs spread as he grinds down on Niall's fingers.   
"My sweet boy. Always mine. Always yours." Harry's fingers dig into Niall's back as he pushes into him slowly, mouth wrapped around one of his nipple's, gently sucking and licking until he is all the way in.  
"Mine." Harry's pants, desperately trying to pull Niall even closer to him. "Mine. All mine." Niall keeps his pace slow,moving in deep until Harry his chocking on his moans and clawing at his back then slowly drawing back so Harry can feel the drag off his cock Niall's name tumbling out of his mouth in a whimper. 

It hot and its love, so much love that Niall feels it fill him up all the way from his toes and up to his chest. 

"I love you." Niall looks down into Harry's eyes, almost completely black and he cant look away, can't get enough of how out of it he looks as Niall makes love to him. Harry just nods, words stuck in his throat as he wraps his legs around Niall waist, the heel of his feet digging into his arse pushing him in even deeper. Both moan loudly, the sound and their breath mixing as Harry starts spilling over his stomach some of it reaching as high as his swallow tattoos. Niall lifts up a little to watch him come apart, hands either side of his head. Harry's eyes are closed his head tilted back into the pillow his moan soft but loud as his hand reaches up to find Niall's, wrapping around his wrist. Niall holds off until he is done and his body has gone slack against the bed then he leans down to kiss him as he starts coming inside Harry, whole body shaking with it. 

"Beautiful." Harry mummers against his lips, looking so blissed out as Niall fills him up. "So beautiful baby, all mine. My boy, love you. Love you so much" Niall sighs, rolling him and Harry onto their sides so he can wrap him up in a hug, not caring about the mess between their stomachs or his come running out of Harry. All he cares about is the person in his arms and making Harry feel loved and wanted. 

"Love you too. Will always love you, nothing and nobody is ever going to change that. Going to marry you. Can't wait to be your husband. Have babies and cats and dogs and fucking rabbits everywhere." Harry laughs, then yawns tucking his head in the crook of Niall's neck.

"Forever." Niall hums kissing at Harry's damp hair.

"Forever." Harry let out a sigh his whole body relaxing in Niall's arms as he leans over to turn off the lamp. 

"Love rabbits." Niall smiles finding Harry's hand under the blanket and holding it tight.

"I know baby. Going to give you everything you love." He feels Harry's lip tug up in a smile against his skin then the soft sound of him falling asleep. 


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I still don't really know how to use this website. Some of this was supposed to be in Italics because they are watching a video of Niall on tv. I shall put a * where there should be Italics.

Niall is sitting on the sofa, Landon's head in his lap as Niall see's how many Smarties he can balance on his face when Liam burst through the front door ball in hand. Landon jumps sending the smarties falling to the floor.

"Do you ever work?" Niall pouts, pushing Landon's head off him. 

"Yes actually, I done some shit this morning. Why are you not at work?" 

"Took the week off to spend time with Macy but she is busy today so thought we could spend the day together instead." Niall cheers jumping up from the sofa, holding his hand up for him to throw the ball. 

He is really proud of Liam for getting his job, even if working in advertisement sounded really boring to Niall, but it kind of sucked that it kept him so busy and they had hardly anytime to hang out properly. 

Liam throws the ball and Niall catches it easily and start throwing it back and forward in his hands. This is when he notices the bandage on Liam hand.

"What's up with that?" Liam holds his hand up, waggling his fingers.

"So I may have got another tattoo last night." Niall scrunched his face up.

"On your hand?"

"Yes on my hand, really hurt but looks so cool. And no you cannot see yet."

"That's mean. I cannot believe you disfigured you hand. What is wrong with a nice plain body Liam? It's probably your dad's fault you like this stuff. I just do not get it. I personally am very happy with my milky white skin and it shall stay that way. Gonna get all old and nasty and I shall laugh. Harry will probably actually freak about that one"

"Well you can just like suck his dick or something." Niall chokes on a laugh, Landon making some disgusted sound.

"So what? When it suits you we suddenly acknowledge that me and your dad are sexual with each other?" Liam nods, holding his thumbs up.

"Exactly right. So anyway I called Zayn on the way over and he said he might come over to, think him and Matt were fighting though so i'm not sure if he actually will." They head outside, Landon following and taking a seat to watch Niall and Liam kick the ball about. 

"Wonder what they could be fighting over. They never fight."

"Not sure but he sounded super worked up." Niall glanced over at Landon to see him typing away on his phone a smile on his face. Niall wonders if he could be texting a boy, he has not thought to ask if Landon was with anyone. 

"How have you and Macy been?" Liam beamed as he told Niall about the progress him and Macy had made since she moved back in. Now back in the same bed and everything, although she was still having issues being intimate with him. Who could blame her though, it was a tough one to deal with. 

"I don't really want to complain about it though, i just feel so bloody lucky to have her back with me think I would be a bit of a twat if I went around moaning that she wont sleep with me."

"Definitely mate. I'm sure you will get there eventually, just got to keep earning her trust. Maybe you should go on holiday, get away just the two of you. Would work let you take more time off?" Niall catches the ball with his feet then kicks it back. 

"Might do. I have not taken any holiday until now so they bloody should really. Working my bloody arse of for that company. I will have to see if Macy can get the time too and then-" The back door slams open cutting Liam off. Landon jumps in his seat and they all turn as Zayn comes charging out, fist clenched at his side. He stops a few feet away from Liam and Niall and lets out a frustrated yell that has Liam edging toward Niall. 

"What the hell?" Zayn's hair is all over the place, which is so unusual, and he looks like he is about to rip someone's head off. 

"Matthew. Fucking Matthew."

"Umm right. Matthew what? Were is Elliott?" It was also pretty unusual for there to be a Zayn without a Elliott attached to him. Zayn let's out a manic laugh and once again Liam edges closer to Niall. 

"My areshole of a husband has him because he has decided I can't be trusted with my own fucking kids right now." Zayn suddenly burst into tears and Niall and Liam both rush forward to pull him into a hug that is all soothing noises and stroking his hair and squeezing to tightly. 

"What happened to make him think that?" Liam asks pulling away and wiping at Zayns face.

"He found drugs." For a second Niall feels himself go a little dizzy, then its like someone threw cold water over him. He steps away from Zayn hand still wrapped around his arm.

"What?" Zayn wipes at his nose, sniffing into his sleeve.

"It's not mine. I swear I have not been getting any or taking them. He would know, everyone would fucking know if I was. He don't believe me and now he is talking about getting me back into rehab and keeping the kids away until I am better and fuck Niall, I'm not taking them I swear." 

"Were did he find them?" 

"This time he found them in my coat pocket. It's not the first time though, he found some a couple of days ago in my art bag and then the day before that he found some in my bedside table. I don't know how they are getting there but it's not me. If I had I would have told someone, I would want help and I would be honest. He wont let me near the kids and i'm not fucking doing them." Niall pulls him back into a hug. He had no idea what to even say to make Zayn feel better about this. The thought of drugs being so close to Zayn is horrible. What if he had found them instead of Matt, would he have been tempted to take them? 

He nearly died. Drugs nearly killed him before and Niall was not around for that and he does not ever, ever want to experience what that must have been like. 

"It my kids Ni. He said I can't see my kids until I am better. I'm already better. I have not done anything wrong. I cant- I can't be away from them." It doesn't make sense. How the hell do drugs get into Zayn's coat and bag and bloody bedside table. In his house. 

"What were they?" Zayn sniffs again, pushing his face into Niall shoulder.

"Pills in my bag and coat. But in my room was Heroin." Liam curses bringing himself back into the hug. 

"Promise me Z, promise me that I should not be worried right now."

"I promise. Please believe me. I don't want everyone to turn against me. Please don't make me go back, I have not taken anything. You would know. I can't hide anything from you." Niall leans back to look directly at Zayn, to see if there was any hint of a lie in his eyes.

"I don't lie to you Niall. I can't" He looks like he is being completely sincere. All Niall can sense from him is how scared he is, how upset and angry. Why does Matt not believe him? its as clear as day that Zayn is being honest. 

"I know, I believe you. We will have to talk to Matt. Let him clam down and then we will talk see if we can sort it out. We also have to work out how the hell drugs got into your house. What if one of the kids had found it." God, the thought of Rae finding pills in Zayn's coat and thinking they were sweets is somewhere his mind really does not want to go. 

"Yeah, yeah OK. He might listen to you. Both of you if you don't mind getting involved Li?"

"Of course I don't mind mate, its all really fucked up so of course I am going to help." Zayn gives him a grateful look. As much as the pair had kept a little hostility from High school they were always there for each other when things got shit. And this was about as shit as it could get for Zayn. 

"It's just so weird. Your coat and bag could have been tampered with outside the house. Someone panicking and wanting to get rid of them, but finding heroin in your bedside table is just baffling me. Someone would have had to go into your house to do that."

"I know. This is why I need Matt on my side. Someone must have done this on purpose right? They either wanted me to find it and take it or they wanted this exact thing to happen." Liam looks down at the ground, frowning. 

"Who though? You haven't pissed anyone off?" Zayn shakes his head, wiping at his nose. 

"What about Rae's real parents? Could they have tracked you down?" 

"No I don't think so. Rae got put in the system when she was only a few weeks old I don't think they would suddenly be interested after so many years. Even if it was there is no way for them to get in the house." Liam turns suddenly booting the ball back towards the house. Niall's eyes land on Landon. He had completely forgot about him being there and he was watching them with a curious look. 

"You know." Liam spoke up, hands resting on his hips. "This mixed with all the shit with Niall is adding up to be really fucking odd. You think someone was in the house a few nights ago right? No sign of a break in?"

"Well yeah but I lost my house key, I think they just simply unlocked the door and came in then locked it on the way out. Nothing has happened since we changed the locks." 

"Hey guys, is everything alright?" Landon is coming towards them, hands shoved into the pocket of his jumper. Zayn instantly goes stiff, face blank as he turns to him.

"It's family stuff." Niall moves towards Landon, moving them back towards the house.

"It's fine Lan, Zayn is just dealing with some stuff. It will get sorted. Let's go make everyone a drink, bloody cold init." Landon just nods, sending Zayn a small smile and letting Niall lead him back inside just as Zayn let out a squawk and a 'what he fuck did you do to your hand ? I want one'

xxxxxxx

Harry comes home and hour early to find Liam and Niall sprawled out on the sofa playing FIFA. Zayn is in the kitchen making himself a snack and Niall thinks Landon might be upstairs.

"Have I gone back in time? Are you both fourteen again?" Liam grunts, foot kicking out at Niall's hand to try and get him to drop the controller.

"Stop it! Cheat." Liam mimics him before answering Harry.

"No time travel i'm afraid. Still stuck in the time zone were you have to kiss Niall's stupid face." Niall pauses the game dodging out of the way of Liam foot as it swings towards him again. 

"Liam got his hand tattooed." 

"Oh maybe we have gone back in time you big baby."

"You got a tattoo on your hand?" Harry walks over to the sofa grabbing hold on Liam's wrist to pull his hand up to his face.

"Liam!" 

"What, you whole body is covered."

"Not my hand! Ouch." Zayn comes back into the room holding a sandwich in his hand.

"Its sick and I am totally getting one too." Harry ignores him, lifting the wrap on Liam's hand a little to peak under it.

"You know your mother would have had a few things to say about this. Would have blamed me too." Landon comes jogging down the stairs then, casting a look at Harry and Liam before sitting down on the armchair. Liam laughs taking his hand out of Harry's grip.

"Niall freaked at me and then said it was your fault. Niall is a mum." Niall pouts, slapping Liam on the back of the neck.

"Too right I am young man. So respect me bitch." Zayn pushes past their feet to sit down on the other side of Niall.

"You two are odd." Harry laughs at that quickly giving Niall his hello kiss before going into the kitchen. 

"You text Matt?" Zayn picks up Niall's controller, starting the game up again. 

"Yeah. The kids are going to his parents tonight and we are going to talk. Think he might have just gone into a panic so hopefully when he has settled down we can get it sorted." Niall places his hand on Zayn knee and give it a squeeze.

"I really hope so. Let me know if you want me to talk to him too." Zayn leans over to kiss the side of Niall's head, eye still on the game. 

Louis comes bursting though the door about ten minutes later just as Liam and Zayn start up a new game and Harry is walking back into the room with a cup of tea. 

"Holy fuck everyone! Holy fuck!" The game is paused again and everyone turns to Louis.

"What?"

"There is a YouTube video made up of some leaked footage of Niall and Landon. An anonymous profile has been made up and they have posted them." Niall swings round to face Landon who is looking back eyes wide.

"What kind of footage?" He asked standing up and walking of to Louis who has his phone out.

"I will put it up on the telly, Liam get this off."

"How did they get footage? I am so confused." Louis starts loading YouTube up on the TV. Harry places his mug down before tugging Niall back over to the sofa to sit with him, Zayn and Liam squashed at the end as Louis settles on the floor. Landon backs away a little. 

"I only watched a little before I left but I think it's pretty innocent stuff. It's already got loads of views, like thousands. Its crazy." Niall swallows, heart already pounding as the video starts to load, he has no idea what they could be about to watch. 

"I swear to god if i see Niall's penis I will cry." Louis swats at Liam shushing him. The video starts and Niall finds himself clinging onto Harry's hand. 

There is a lot of scuffling sounds then Niall's trainers come into the shot, the ones he used to wear everywhere and almost cried over when they broke. The camera pans up and then the back of Landon's head is the focus. Niall remembers it straight away. He filmed this during his second week in Venice when Landon was taking him to get some stuff for the restaurant. Niall looks over his shoulder at Landon who just gives him a weak smile before looking back at the screen. 

"You know this Niall?" Liam asks.

"Yeah, i filmed this on my old camera. I ended up giving it to Beth because she used it more then me."

* "Is it always this crazy?" Landon turns to Niall, dimples on full display as he pushes thought the crowd.

"Yes! Bloody tourist everywhere. We are nearly there. Got to toughen up Horan! Don't be afraid to shove." Landon tuns back again and Niall mutters a 'shit' before he turns the camera on himself, blonde haired and grinning. 

"This place is bloody amazing." *

The video cuts off and the screen goes black for a second before another starts up. This time both Landon and Niall are in the shot together, filmed by Beth, and its dark. 

"So weird to see you with blonde hair." Harry whispers holding Niall's hand a little tighter. 

* "So we have just got done taking Mr tourist here on a boat trip." 

"Excuse you Bethany, I think we can stop calling me a tourist now." 

Niall and Landon are both holding hands, swinging them back a forward like they wanted everyone who passed to notice. 

"Umm you just made us go and do the most touristy thing ever so no we can not stop calling you that can be Lan?" 

"The boat trips are pretty lame for us locals." The street behind them is empty and when Niall laughs it echos around them loudly. 

"Whatever guys. How long do I have to live here before I am classed as a local then?" Bethany hums, the camera shaking for a moment before she settles it again.

"I would say two years." Landon snorts, but then nods in agreement. Niall glances over at him shyly.

"Well, i might just have to stick around to find out what being a local is like." *

Again the screen goes black and for a moment its just everyone looking at their reflection before the next one cuts in. This time its inside the restaurant and Niall really cant help but smile at the sight of it. It's empty and music is playing loudly, Niall's music, so it passed closing. 

* Niall comes onto the screen dancing around with a mop, the sound of Landon's laughter can be heard behind the camera. 

"You are such an idiot."

"Shut up, I can dance really well." Niall does a shimmy, nearly drops the mop but manages to catch it and does a dip with it instead. 

"Smooth." Niall laughs, twirling around then suddenly vanishing from the screen. When he comes back he has a laughing Beth in his arms and they dance around together, Beth's head flung back as she lets Niall spin her around. 

"Ok stop! I'm going to be sick." Niall dips her and makes a big show of kissing her hand before putting her back upright and letting her go. 

"I will say it again, you are such an idiot." Niall walks towards the camera wiping at his forehead.

"Nah, your just jealous of my mean mopping and dancing skills. I would teach you but i'm afraid it a talent one must be born with." Landon snorts, and he leans forward pushing the camera even closer to Niall face.

"That or I am jealous that the mop and my sister got to dance with you and I didn't." The blush on Niall's face is instant and he lets out some kind of weird giggle before standing back up right.

"Whatever you. So what you teaching me tonight?" * 

Zayn clears his throat when the video ends glancing towards Harry.

"We going to keep watching?" Niall opens his mouth to answer but Harry gets there first.

"Yes." Niall looks at him to try and work out what he is thinking. It's not really been too bad. Its probably clear in the videos that Niall is crushing on Landon but that is all. Now he knows the videos are coming from his old camera he knows nothing too bad will be on them. He just had to find out how they went from that to YouTube, and how to get it all taken down. 

When the next video plays Niall instantly recognises the scenery. Everyone must do actually because Landon and Niall are both stood in front of the Colosseum.

"No way." Landon moves closer. "This is when I took you to Rome." Niall can feel Harry staring at him but he ignores it to look at the screen. 

"Yeah, with Beth." He adds because he really wants Harry to know that it was not some romantic trip for him and Landon. Hopefully it makes up for the fact that most of the video shows Niall and Landon walking around holding hands and being all stupid by shoving ice cream in each other faces and looking on the verge of kissing the whole bloody time. Beth sure was good at catching all the moments on camera. By the end of that short video Harry is still holding Niall's hand but his grip has loosened and he is frowning. 

The next video is really short and just shows the outside of the restaurant after a flood. Beth is filming again and its just shows a few tourist out splashing in the water like idiots, Landon starting to clear up and off in the distance a little bit Niall is talking with Daisy. His heart leaps at the sight of her and suddenly he is grinning and leaning towards the television more. God he had really missed her. 

The next video is loud and starts of as a blur as beth is running with the camera. When she stops and holds it up both Niall and Landon start laughing.

"Girardino wedding." Niall looks up at Landon nodding to let him know he remembers.

Niall is wearing a ridiculous hat and it obviously very drunk, drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other. He does look really good in his suit though. Landon appears behind him wearing a matching hat and they both do some random dance. Beth joins in, camera jostling around and there is an occasional show of Daisy who is also dancing. 

"You look happy." Zayn comments, when Niall face come back into view cigarette now between his lip as he bobs about. 

"He was." Landon practically whispers. Harry lets out a breath and Niall thinks his grip gets even looser on him. The scene cuts to later in the wedding, now dark with fairy lights everywhere lighting the dance floor. A slow song is playing and Niall and Landon are the only ones on the dance floor with the bride and groom. Niall's head is on Landon's shoulder as the sway together, Landon's hand slowly moving up and down Niall's back. God, Niall can remember that night. He had been with them for over two months and he was really starting to like Landon by then. He can remember how nervous he got when Landon first asked him to dance, how much he enjoyed being in his arms. 

After that clip there are a few photos, like a slideshow. Pictures of Niall and Landon working. Side by side washing up, Landon stood nearby as Niall cleaned. Niall leaning over the counter as Landon explained to him about the food they were cooking. 

A picture of them at the beach, in swim shorts arms around each other. 

Asleep on the sofa, Niall's leg flung over Landon's waist and his face shoved under his armpit. 

Niall sat at the kitchen table helping Beth with school work, a confused frown on his face. 

Niall sat on his own, notebook and pen in hand looking content. 

Niall kissing Landon's cheek, hand up to cup his cheek and bring him closer. 

Niall and Landon kissing, Niall smiling into the kiss so much you can see his teeth. 

Harry lets go of his hand, leaning forward to rest his elbows in his knee.

"Why would someone make a video out of all this?" Louis asked looking over at Niall. Niall shrugs because honestly he has no idea. 

How did they even get it? He can only imagine Beth must have lost the camera at some point and someone found it and maybe recognised who Niall was? Or just thought it was cute and would get them some views. 

Another video starts and Niall is about to leap up to turn it off when Harry places his hand on his leg to keep him down. 

Landon is filming Niall from above. Niall is clearly naked, face and chest flushed red from sex. He looks up into the camera and laughs covering his face with his arm. 

* "You know Beth will freak if she knows you are filming me like this." 

"Well it will teach the girl to stop stealing your stuff. Maybe we should get a dick shot." Niall yelps as Landon tugs on the blanket almost getting Niall's dick in the shot. Niall grips the blanket, playfully glaring up at Landon. 

"You look hot like this, can you blame me for wanting to document Niall Horan post sex." Niall rolls his eyes slapping at the camera. 

"You are such a twat. I don't know why I have sex with you."

"Because I am the bestest. Also I make you come like a hundred times."

"Lan! Seriously Beth will see this." Landon laughs.

"I will delete it don't worry. She wont know about my amazing cock sucking skills." Niall grones turning his head into the pillow. 

"Get off me."

"I shall not. Give me a sec because we are going again. Empty house and all that. But while we wait, tell me something."

"Like what?"

"Something I don't know. Like what are you running from? Why don't you want to go back home?" Niall's huffs out a laugh that sounds strained and forced as he gets up on his elbows.

"I'm not running. I just don't want to go home. Do you want me to?"

"No. Never. Just got a feeling there was something stopping you. Other then not wanting to leave my pretty face of course." Niall flops back onto the bed rolling his eyes. For a second it looks like he is going to says something but then he stops and just shrugs his shoulders. 

"Just don't want to be around the place I lost Ma is all. Nothing really to go back for anyway." 

"You think she would have liked me?" Niall smiles, reaching up.

"Yeah. You make me happy. That would have made her like you." The camera is placed down by the side of the bed and then Landon is leaning down to kiss Niall. He moves down to Niall's neck then kisses over his chest. 

"Hey you. I'm not making a sex tape on the device your sister uses." Landon looks up and smirk, going lower and lower down Niall body.

"Better turn it off real quick then." Landon dissapears and Niall is letting out a quite gasp before leaning over to switch it off. * 

The atmosphere in the room is so tense. Niall closes his eyes.

"You didn't delete it." 

"Nothing to go home for?" Niall cant look at Harry. He feels so shit that Harry had to just see that when he knows how much he struggles with his and Landon's past relationship. Liam, Zayn and Louis are also avoided eye contact and the whole thing just feels horrible.

Another video starts and Niall feels sick. He just wants it to stop. This time it's filmed through a small crack in the door of Landons bedroom and it has Landon up and out of his seat in a flash.

"Turn it off." His voice shakes, nobody moves. They all seem frozen as they watch. 

"Why was she filming this?" 

Niall is sat at the head of the bed, bedsheets pulled all the way up to his neck. Landon is sat on the end wearing just a pair of boxers. He is bent over looking down at the floor. 

"We should turn it off." Niall says. He remembers this day so clearly. Everything went downhill after this day. It all went toxic and Niall hates himself so much for the way he messed with Landon. Again nobody moves.

* "Why can't I be enough?"

"You are. Your are enough. You always are." Landon shakes his head, running a hand over his hair then looking up. 

"You said his name. Your have never looked at me like that before and I thought... you said his name." 

"I'm sorry."

"Your sorry? You were thinking of him." Niall starts to cry, head falling down into his hands.

"You don't get to cry." Landon stands up spinning around to face Niall. "You don't get to fucking cry. Were you thinking of him?"

"Yes."

"Do you always think of him?" When Niall does not answer Landon crawls up the bed grabbing at his chin and yanking his face up. "Do you always think of him?" 

"Yes." Landon drops his face, getting back off the bed. 

"When you told me about him I thought you had gotten over him but it's all still about him. Everything is about Harry." Niall's body jolts at the name and he is up and out of bed in a second shoving his hands into Landon's chest and pushing him.

"Don't say his fucking name." Landon stumbles back into the wall and Beth gasps.

"You always act like his name is this terrible thing. You can talk about it but God forbid we say his name. Until i'm fucking you that is, then apparently its all Harry, Harry, Harry. Well fuck him because he left you and he did not want you." Niall slaps Landon across the face. 

"You don't say his name. You don't fucking say it." Niall sobs falling back down onto the bed hand over his mouth. Landon sits down next to him, hand covering his cheek. They both stay silent for a while, just the sound of Niall crying. 

"Is that what you need?" Landon speaks up, head bowed down.

"What?" 

"You need me to be him? You need to pretend I am him so you can trick yourself in to believing you still have him?" There is silence then...

"Yes." Landon nods, face screwing up like he is about to cry.

"I'm in love with you."

"I know."

"Will you ever stop loving him?"

"No."

"Could you ever love me? Eventually."

"No." 

"Then fine. I will give you what you need. I will be him for you. You say his name all you want, I can deal with it."

"Lan-"

"I can fucking deal with it. Just let me love you how I want to love you. This is what we are doing. I can be him." Landon gets up and starts to get dressed. 

"I'm so sorry Landon. I don't want to hurt you."

"Yeah well." Landon pulls a jumper on keeping his face turned away from where Niall is sitting on the bed. "I just want some space for a bit. We don't need to talk about this anymore." Landon walks towards the door and Beth lets out another gasp then is running down the hallway before turning the camera off. * 

The video ends and nobody moves for what fees like hours. Niall eventually looks up at Landon. His face is white, his eyes shimmering and then he turns and leaves the room the back door opening and slamming shut.

"I should-I should go check on him." Harry nods, moving so Niall can get up. 

"Are you ok Harry?" Harry nods again, but he wont look at Niall and his bottom lip is pulled in so tight the skin around it has gone white.

"Harry-"

"Go check on him. That must have been hard for him." 

"You too." Harry laughs shaking his head.

"Just go." Niall looks up at the others. Louis motions for Niall to go so he does. 

It's turned even colder outside and Niall had not thought to put shoes on so he trudges across the grass feet soaked through in seconds. He doesn't talk at first, just hovers behind Landon feeling beyond awkward and so terrible guilty for what he started that day. 

"I'm sorry you had to watch that." Landon breaths in before letting it out again. 

"Yeah well, should have known the little weasel was probably filming us right?" Niall does not like that Landon is trying to make a joke of it. Whenever Niall tries to bring this up he always avoids. They need to talk about it, he needs to understand how sorry Niall is. 

"Lan, can we talk about this please? I feel so much guilt for what I asked you to do. I took advantage of the fact that you wanted to please me, i used your love for me."

"I can't talk about this Niall. I can move on and be your friend but I cannot drag it all back up again. I got over it. Please don't make me talk about it. You don't have to feel guilty. Yes it really sucked seeing that all play out again and it really fucking sucked that the people who seem to not like me got to have front row seats to it all. I'm going to kill Bethany for letting that all get out." Louis had said there were thousands of views already. Thousands of people had sat and watched that. 

"I am so sorry."

"Stop saying sorry Niall. I forgive you for what you done. It's not just your fault. I should have said no, I could have broke it off with you and had a bit more respect for myself but I didn't. It happened. I fell in love with you at the wrong time, you were messed up and it just happened to be me that got caught up in it. It happened and it's done and we do not need to talk about it anymore." Niall backs down quickly. He thinks it should be talked about but he also feels like he does not have the right to push Landon on the subject. Either he really was over it and just did not feel the need to discuss it or it still hurt to much to talk about. Niall hoped he was over it. He does not want to still be hurting him after all this time.

"Ok fine. It's done, I shall lock it in a box." Landon finally turns to Niall, eyes red and cheeks wet.

"Thank you." Niall steps forward and hugs him.

xxx

Harry stands in the kitchen watching out the window as Niall and Landon hug. Louis steps up beside him arms crossed over his chest. 

"It was him." Louis says nodding towards the window.

"I know. Niall won't believe us though. It was a smart move." 

"Remind him of all the good times."

"To make him feel even worse about the bad." Louis steps back.

"He is good at setting a trap." 

"Yeah he is. Too good." Harry glares out the window, teeth gritted. 

"Niall is walking right into it and he has no idea." 

Niall is sitting on the sofa, Landon's head in his lap as Niall see's how many Smarties he can balance on his face when Liam burst through the front door ball in hand. Landon jumps sending the smarties falling to the floor.

"Do you ever work?" Niall pouts, pushing Landon's head off him. 

"Yes actually, I done some shit this morning. Why are you not at work?" 

"Took the week off to spend time with Macy but she is busy today so thought we could spend the day together instead." Niall cheers jumping up from the sofa, holding his hand up for him to throw the ball. 

He is really proud of Liam for getting his job, even if working in advertisement sounded really boring to Niall, but it kind of sucked that it kept him so busy and they had hardly anytime to hang out properly. 

Liam throws the ball and Niall catches it easily and start throwing it back and forward in his hands. This is when he notices the bandage on Liam hand.

"What's up with that?" Liam holds his hand up, waggling his fingers.

"So I may have got another tattoo last night." Niall scrunched his face up.

"On your hand?"

"Yes on my hand, really hurt but looks so cool. And no you cannot see yet."

"That's mean. I cannot believe you disfigured you hand. What is wrong with a nice plain body Liam? It's probably your dad's fault you like this stuff. I just do not get it. I personally am very happy with my milky white skin and it shall stay that way. Gonna get all old and nasty and I shall laugh. Harry will probably actually freak about that one"

"Well you can just like suck his dick or something." Niall chokes on a laugh, Landon making some disgusted sound.

"So what? When it suits you we suddenly acknowledge that me and your dad are sexual with each other?" Liam nods, holding his thumbs up.

"Exactly right. So anyway I called Zayn on the way over and he said he might come over to, think him and Matt were fighting though so i'm not sure if he actually will." They head outside, Landon following and taking a seat to watch Niall and Liam kick the ball about. 

"Wonder what they could be fighting over. They never fight."

"Not sure but he sounded super worked up." Niall glanced over at Landon to see him typing away on his phone a smile on his face. Niall wonders if he could be texting a boy, he has not thought to ask if Landon was with anyone. 

"How have you and Macy been?" Liam beamed as he told Niall about the progress him and Macy had made since she moved back in. Now back in the same bed and everything, although she was still having issues being intimate with him. Who could blame her though, it was a tough one to deal with. 

"I don't really want to complain about it though, i just feel so bloody lucky to have her back with me think I would be a bit of a twat if I went around moaning that she wont sleep with me."

"Definitely mate. I'm sure you will get there eventually, just got to keep earning her trust. Maybe you should go on holiday, get away just the two of you. Would work let you take more time off?" Niall catches the ball with his feet then kicks it back. 

"Might do. I have not taken any holiday until now so they bloody should really. Working my bloody arse of for that company. I will have to see if Macy can get the time too and then-" The back door slams open cutting Liam off. Landon jumps in his seat and they all turn as Zayn comes charging out, fist clenched at his side. He stops a few feet away from Liam and Niall and lets out a frustrated yell that has Liam edging toward Niall. 

"What the hell?" Zayn's hair is all over the place, which is so unusual, and he looks like he is about to rip someone's head off. 

"Matthew. Fucking Matthew."

"Umm right. Matthew what? Were is Elliott?" It was also pretty unusual for there to be a Zayn without a Elliott attached to him. Zayn let's out a manic laugh and once again Liam edges closer to Niall. 

"My areshole of a husband has him because he has decided I can't be trusted with my own fucking kids right now." Zayn suddenly burst into tears and Niall and Liam both rush forward to pull him into a hug that is all soothing noises and stroking his hair and squeezing to tightly. 

"What happened to make him think that?" Liam asks pulling away and wiping at Zayns face.

"He found drugs." For a second Niall feels himself go a little dizzy, then its like someone threw cold water over him. He steps away from Zayn hand still wrapped around his arm.

"What?" Zayn wipes at his nose, sniffing into his sleeve.

"It's not mine. I swear I have not been getting any or taking them. He would know, everyone would fucking know if I was. He don't believe me and now he is talking about getting me back into rehab and keeping the kids away until I am better and fuck Niall, I'm not taking them I swear." 

"Were did he find them?" 

"This time he found them in my coat pocket. It's not the first time though, he found some a couple of days ago in my art bag and then the day before that he found some in my bedside table. I don't know how they are getting there but it's not me. If I had I would have told someone, I would want help and I would be honest. He wont let me near the kids and i'm not fucking doing them." Niall pulls him back into a hug. He had no idea what to even say to make Zayn feel better about this. The thought of drugs being so close to Zayn is horrible. What if he had found them instead of Matt, would he have been tempted to take them? 

He nearly died. Drugs nearly killed him before and Niall was not around for that and he does not ever, ever want to experience what that must have been like. 

"It my kids Ni. He said I can't see my kids until I am better. I'm already better. I have not done anything wrong. I cant- I can't be away from them." It doesn't make sense. How the hell do drugs get into Zayn's coat and bag and bloody bedside table. In his house. 

"What were they?" Zayn sniffs again, pushing his face into Niall shoulder.

"Pills in my bag and coat. But in my room was Heroin." Liam curses bringing himself back into the hug. 

"Promise me Z, promise me that I should not be worried right now."

"I promise. Please believe me. I don't want everyone to turn against me. Please don't make me go back, I have not taken anything. You would know. I can't hide anything from you." Niall leans back to look directly at Zayn, to see if there was any hint of a lie in his eyes.

"I don't lie to you Niall. I can't" He looks like he is being completely sincere. All Niall can sense from him is how scared he is, how upset and angry. Why does Matt not believe him? its as clear as day that Zayn is being honest. 

"I know, I believe you. We will have to talk to Matt. Let him clam down and then we will talk see if we can sort it out. We also have to work out how the hell drugs got into your house. What if one of the kids had found it." God, the thought of Rae finding pills in Zayn's coat and thinking they were sweets is somewhere his mind really does not want to go. 

"Yeah, yeah OK. He might listen to you. Both of you if you don't mind getting involved Li?"

"Of course I don't mind mate, its all really fucked up so of course I am going to help." Zayn gives him a grateful look. As much as the pair had kept a little hostility from High school they were always there for each other when things got shit. And this was about as shit as it could get for Zayn. 

"It's just so weird. Your coat and bag could have been tampered with outside the house. Someone panicking and wanting to get rid of them, but finding heroin in your bedside table is just baffling me. Someone would have had to go into your house to do that."

"I know. This is why I need Matt on my side. Someone must have done this on purpose right? They either wanted me to find it and take it or they wanted this exact thing to happen." Liam looks down at the ground, frowning. 

"Who though? You haven't pissed anyone off?" Zayn shakes his head, wiping at his nose. 

"What about Rae's real parents? Could they have tracked you down?" 

"No I don't think so. Rae got put in the system when she was only a few weeks old I don't think they would suddenly be interested after so many years. Even if it was there is no way for them to get in the house." Liam turns suddenly booting the ball back towards the house. Niall's eyes land on Landon. He had completely forgot about him being there and he was watching them with a curious look. 

"You know." Liam spoke up, hands resting on his hips. "This mixed with all the shit with Niall is adding up to be really fucking odd. You think someone was in the house a few nights ago right? No sign of a break in?"

"Well yeah but I lost my house key, I think they just simply unlocked the door and came in then locked it on the way out. Nothing has happened since we changed the locks." 

"Hey guys, is everything alright?" Landon is coming towards them, hands shoved into the pocket of his jumper. Zayn instantly goes stiff, face blank as he turns to him.

"It's family stuff." Niall moves towards Landon, moving them back towards the house.

"It's fine Lan, Zayn is just dealing with some stuff. It will get sorted. Let's go make everyone a drink, bloody cold init." Landon just nods, sending Zayn a small smile and letting Niall lead him back inside just as Zayn let out a squawk and a 'what he fuck did you do to your hand ? I want one'

xxxxxxx

Harry comes home and hour early to find Liam and Niall sprawled out on the sofa playing FIFA. Zayn is in the kitchen making himself a snack and Niall thinks Landon might be upstairs.

"Have I gone back in time? Are you both fourteen again?" Liam grunts, foot kicking out at Niall's hand to try and get him to drop the controller.

"Stop it! Cheat." Liam mimics him before answering Harry.

"No time travel i'm afraid. Still stuck in the time zone were you have to kiss Niall's stupid face." Niall pauses the game dodging out of the way of Liam foot as it swings towards him again. 

"Liam got his hand tattooed." 

"Oh maybe we have gone back in time you big baby."

"You got a tattoo on your hand?" Harry walks over to the sofa grabbing hold on Liam's wrist to pull his hand up to his face.

"Liam!" 

"What, you whole body is covered."

"Not my hand! Ouch." Zayn comes back into the room holding a sandwich in his hand.

"Its sick and I am totally getting one too." Harry ignores him, lifting the wrap on Liam's hand a little to peak under it.

"You know your mother would have had a few things to say about this. Would have blamed me too." Landon comes jogging down the stairs then, casting a look at Harry and Liam before sitting down on the armchair. Liam laughs taking his hand out of Harry's grip.

"Niall freaked at me and then said it was your fault. Niall is a mum." Niall pouts, slapping Liam on the back of the neck.

"Too right I am young man. So respect me bitch." Zayn pushes past their feet to sit down on the other side of Niall.

"You two are odd." Harry laughs at that quickly giving Niall his hello kiss before going into the kitchen. 

"You text Matt?" Zayn picks up Niall's controller, starting the game up again. 

"Yeah. The kids are going to his parents tonight and we are going to talk. Think he might have just gone into a panic so hopefully when he has settled down we can get it sorted." Niall places his hand on Zayn knee and give it a squeeze.

"I really hope so. Let me know if you want me to talk to him too." Zayn leans over to kiss the side of Niall's head, eye still on the game. 

Louis comes bursting though the door about ten minutes later just as Liam and Zayn start up a new game and Harry is walking back into the room with a cup of tea. 

"Holy fuck everyone! Holy fuck!" The game is paused again and everyone turns to Louis.

"What?"

"There is a YouTube video made up of some leaked footage of Niall and Landon. An anonymous profile has been made up and they have posted them." Niall swings round to face Landon who is looking back eyes wide.

"What kind of footage?" He asked standing up and walking of to Louis who has his phone out.

"I will put it up on the telly, Liam get this off."

"How did they get footage? I am so confused." Louis starts loading YouTube up on the TV. Harry places his mug down before tugging Niall back over to the sofa to sit with him, Zayn and Liam squashed at the end as Louis settles on the floor. Landon backs away a little. 

"I only watched a little before I left but I think it's pretty innocent stuff. It's already got loads of views, like thousands. Its crazy." Niall swallows, heart already pounding as the video starts to load, he has no idea what they could be about to watch. 

"I swear to god if i see Niall's penis I will cry." Louis swats at Liam shushing him. The video starts and Niall finds himself clinging onto Harry's hand. 

There is a lot of scuffling sounds then Niall's trainers come into the shot, the ones he used to wear everywhere and almost cried over when they broke. The camera pans up and then the back of Landon's head is the focus. Niall remembers it straight away. He filmed this during his second week in Venice when Landon was taking him to get some stuff for the restaurant. Niall looks over his shoulder at Landon who just gives him a weak smile before looking back at the screen. 

"You know this Niall?" Liam asks.

"Yeah, i filmed this on my old camera. I ended up giving it to Beth because she used it more then me."

"Is it always this crazy?" Landon turns to Niall, dimples on full display as he pushes thought the crowd.

"Yes! Bloody tourist everywhere. We are nearly there. Got to toughen up Horan! Don't be afraid to shove." Landon tuns back again and Niall mutters a 'shit' before he turns the camera on himself, blonde haired and grinning. 

"This place is bloody amazing." 

The video cuts off and the screen goes black for a second before another starts up. This time both Landon and Niall are in the shot together, filmed by Beth, and its dark. 

"So weird to see you with blonde hair." Harry whispers holding Niall's hand a little tighter. 

"So we have just got done taking Mr tourist here on a boat trip." 

"Excuse you Bethany, I think we can stop calling me a tourist now." 

Niall and Landon are both holding hands, swinging them back a forward like they wanted everyone who passed to notice. 

"Umm you just made us go and do the most touristy thing ever so no we can not stop calling you that can be Lan?" 

"The boat trips are pretty lame for us locals." The street behind them is empty and when Niall laughs it echos around them loudly. 

"Whatever guys. How long do I have to live here before I am classed as a local then?" Bethany hums, the camera shaking for a moment before she settles it again.

"I would say two years." Landon snorts, but then nods in agreement. Niall glances over at him shyly.

"Well, i might just have to stick around to find out what being a local is like."

Again the screen goes black and for a moment its just everyone looking at their reflection before the next one cuts in. This time its inside the restaurant and Niall really cant help but smile at the sight of it. It's empty and music is playing loudly, Niall's music, so it passed closing. 

Niall comes onto the screen dancing around with a mop, the sound of Landon's laughter can be heard behind the camera. 

"You are such an idiot."

"Shut up, I can dance really well." Niall does a shimmy, nearly drops the mop but manages to catch it and does a dip with it instead. 

"Smooth." Niall laughs, twirling around then suddenly vanishing from the screen. When he comes back he has a laughing Beth in his arms and they dance around together, Beth's head flung back as she lets Niall spin her around. 

"Ok stop! I'm going to be sick." Niall dips her and makes a big show of kissing her hand before putting her back upright and letting her go. 

"I will say it again, you are such an idiot." Niall walks towards the camera wiping at his forehead.

"Nah, your just jealous of my mean mopping and dancing skills. I would teach you but i'm afraid it a talent one must be born with." Landon snorts, and he leans forward pushing the camera even closer to Niall face.

"That or I am jealous that the mop and my sister got to dance with you and I didn't." The blush on Niall's face is instant and he lets out some kind of weird giggle before standing back up right.

"Whatever you. So what you teaching me tonight?" 

Zayn clears his throat when the video ends glancing towards Harry.

"We going to keep watching?" Niall opens his mouth to answer but Harry gets there first.

"Yes." Niall looks at him to try and work out what he is thinking. It's not really been too bad. Its probably clear in the videos that Niall is crushing on Landon but that is all. Now he knows the videos are coming from his old camera he knows nothing too bad will be on them. He just had to find out how they went from that to YouTube, and how to get it all taken down. 

When the next video plays Niall instantly recognises the scenery. Everyone must do actually because Landon and Niall are both stood in front of the Colosseum.

"No way." Landon moves closer. "This is when I took you to Rome." Niall can feel Harry staring at him but he ignores it to look at the screen. 

"Yeah, with Beth." He adds because he really wants Harry to know that it was not some romantic trip for him and Landon. Hopefully it makes up for the fact that most of the video shows Niall and Landon walking around holding hands and being all stupid by shoving ice cream in each other faces and looking on the verge of kissing the whole bloody time. Beth sure was good at catching all the moments on camera. By the end of that short video Harry is still holding Niall's hand but his grip has loosened and he is frowning. 

The next video is really short and just shows the outside of the restaurant after a flood. Beth is filming again and its just shows a few tourist out splashing in the water like idiots, Landon starting to clear up and off in the distance a little bit Niall is talking with Daisy. His heart leaps at the sight of her and suddenly he is grinning and leaning towards the television more. God he had really missed her. 

The next video is loud and starts of as a blur as beth is running with the camera. When she stops and holds it up both Niall and Landon start laughing.

"Girardino wedding." Niall looks up at Landon nodding to let him know he remembers.

Niall is wearing a ridiculous hat and it obviously very drunk, drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other. He does look really good in his suit though. Landon appears behind him wearing a matching hat and they both do some random dance. Beth joins in, camera jostling around and there is an occasional show of Daisy who is also dancing. 

"You look happy." Zayn comments, when Niall face come back into view cigarette now between his lip as he bobs about. 

"He was." Landon practically whispers. Harry lets out a breath and Niall thinks his grip gets even looser on him. The scene cuts to later in the wedding, now dark with fairy lights everywhere lighting the dance floor. A slow song is playing and Niall and Landon are the only ones on the dance floor with the bride and groom. Niall's head is on Landon's shoulder as the sway together, Landon's hand slowly moving up and down Niall's back. God, Niall can remember that night. He had been with them for over two months and he was really starting to like Landon by then. He can remember how nervous he got when Landon first asked him to dance, how much he enjoyed being in his arms. 

After that clip there are a few photos, like a slideshow. Pictures of Niall and Landon working. Side by side washing up, Landon stood nearby as Niall cleaned. Niall leaning over the counter as Landon explained to him about the food they were cooking. 

A picture of them at the beach, in swim shorts arms around each other. 

Asleep on the sofa, Niall's leg flung over Landon's waist and his face shoved under his armpit. 

Niall sat at the kitchen table helping Beth with school work, a confused frown on his face. 

Niall sat on his own, notebook and pen in hand looking content. 

Niall kissing Landon's cheek, hand up to cup his cheek and bring him closer. 

Niall and Landon kissing, Niall smiling into the kiss so much you can see his teeth. 

Harry lets go of his hand, leaning forward to rest his elbows in his knee.

"Why would someone make a video out of all this?" Louis asked looking over at Niall. Niall shrugs because honestly he has no idea. 

How did they even get it? He can only imagine Beth must have lost the camera at some point and someone found it and maybe recognised who Niall was? Or just thought it was cute and would get them some views. 

Another video starts and Niall is about to leap up to turn it off when Harry places his hand on his leg to keep him down. 

Landon is filming Niall from above. Niall is clearly naked, face and chest flushed red from sex. He looks up into the camera and laughs covering his face with his arm. 

"You know Beth will freak if she knows you are filming me like this." 

"Well it will teach the girl to stop stealing your stuff. Maybe we should get a dick shot." Niall yelps as Landon tugs on the blanket almost getting Niall's dick in the shot. Niall grips the blanket, playfully glaring up at Landon. 

"You look hot like this, can you blame me for wanting to document Niall Horan post sex." Niall rolls his eyes slapping at the camera. 

"You are such a twat. I don't know why I have sex with you."

"Because I am the bestest. Also I make you come like a hundred times."

"Lan! Seriously Beth will see this." Landon laughs.

"I will delete it don't worry. She wont know about my amazing cock sucking skills." Niall grones turning his head into the pillow. 

"Get off me."

"I shall not. Give me a sec because we are going again. Empty house and all that. But while we wait, tell me something."

"Like what?"

"Something I don't know. Like what are you running from? Why don't you want to go back home?" Niall's huffs out a laugh that sounds strained and forced as he gets up on his elbows.

"I'm not running. I just don't want to go home. Do you want me to?"

"No. Never. Just got a feeling there was something stopping you. Other then not wanting to leave my pretty face of course." Niall flops back onto the bed rolling his eyes. For a second it looks like he is going to says something but then he stops and just shrugs his shoulders. 

"Just don't want to be around the place I lost Ma is all. Nothing really to go back for anyway." 

"You think she would have liked me?" Niall smiles, reaching up.

"Yeah. You make me happy. That would have made her like you." The camera is placed down by the side of the bed and then Landon is leaning down to kiss Niall. He moves down to Niall's neck then kisses over his chest. 

"Hey you. I'm not making a sex tape on the device your sister uses." Landon looks up and smirk, going lower and lower down Niall body.

"Better turn it off real quick then." Landon dissapears and Niall is letting out a quite gasp before leaning over to switch it off. 

The atmosphere in the room is so tense. Niall closes his eyes.

"You didn't delete it." 

"Nothing to go home for?" Niall cant look at Harry. He feels so shit that Harry had to just see that when he knows how much he struggles with his and Landon's past relationship. Liam, Zayn and Louis are also avoided eye contact and the whole thing just feels horrible.

Another video starts and Niall feels sick. He just wants it to stop. This time it's filmed through a small crack in the door of Landons bedroom and it has Landon up and out of his seat in a flash.

"Turn it off." His voice shakes, nobody moves. They all seem frozen as they watch. 

"Why was she filming this?" 

Niall is sat at the head of the bed, bedsheets pulled all the way up to his neck. Landon is sat on the end wearing just a pair of boxers. He is bent over looking down at the floor. 

"We should turn it off." Niall says. He remembers this day so clearly. Everything went downhill after this day. It all went toxic and Niall hates himself so much for the way he messed with Landon. Again nobody moves.

"Why can't I be enough?"

"You are. Your are enough. You always are." Landon shakes his head, running a hand over his hair then looking up. 

"You said his name. Your have never looked at me like that before and I thought... you said his name." 

"I'm sorry."

"Your sorry? You were thinking of him." Niall starts to cry, head falling down into his hands.

"You don't get to cry." Landon stands up spinning around to face Niall. "You don't get to fucking cry. Were you thinking of him?"

"Yes."

"Do you always think of him?" When Niall does not answer Landon crawls up the bed grabbing at his chin and yanking his face up. "Do you always think of him?" 

"Yes." Landon drops his face, getting back off the bed. 

"When you told me about him I thought you had gotten over him but it's all still about him. Everything is about Harry." Niall's body jolts at the name and he is up and out of bed in a second shoving his hands into Landon's chest and pushing him.

"Don't say his fucking name." Landon stumbles back into the wall and Beth gasps.

"You always act like his name is this terrible thing. You can talk about it but God forbid we say his name. Until i'm fucking you that is, then apparently its all Harry, Harry, Harry. Well fuck him because he left you and he did not want you." Niall slaps Landon across the face. 

"You don't say his name. You don't fucking say it." Niall sobs falling back down onto the bed hand over his mouth. Landon sits down next to him, hand covering his cheek. They both stay silent for a while, just the sound of Niall crying. 

"Is that what you need?" Landon speaks up, head bowed down.

"What?" 

"You need me to be him? You need to pretend I am him so you can trick yourself in to believing you still have him?" There is silence then...

"Yes." Landon nods, face screwing up like he is about to cry.

"I'm in love with you."

"I know."

"Will you ever stop loving him?"

"No."

"Could you ever love me? Eventually."

"No." 

"Then fine. I will give you what you need. I will be him for you. You say his name all you want, I can deal with it."

"Lan-"

"I can fucking deal with it. Just let me love you how I want to love you. This is what we are doing. I can be him." Landon gets up and starts to get dressed. 

"I'm so sorry Landon. I don't want to hurt you."

"Yeah well." Landon pulls a jumper on keeping his face turned away from where Niall is sitting on the bed. "I just want some space for a bit. We don't need to talk about this anymore." Landon walks towards the door and Beth lets out another gasp then is running down the hallway before turning the camera off. 

The video ends and nobody moves for what fees like hours. Niall eventually looks up at Landon. His face is white, his eyes shimmering and then he turns and leaves the room the back door opening and slamming shut.

"I should-I should go check on him." Harry nods, moving so Niall can get up. 

"Are you ok Harry?" Harry nods again, but he wont look at Niall and his bottom lip is pulled in so tight the skin around it has gone white.

"Harry-"

"Go check on him. That must have been hard for him." 

"You too." Harry laughs shaking his head.

"Just go." Niall looks up at the others. Louis motions for Niall to go so he does. 

It's turned even colder outside and Niall had not thought to put shoes on so he trudges across the grass feet soaked through in seconds. He doesn't talk at first, just hovers behind Landon feeling beyond awkward and so terrible guilty for what he started that day. 

"I'm sorry you had to watch that." Landon breaths in before letting it out again. 

"Yeah well, should have known the little weasel was probably filming us right?" Niall does not like that Landon is trying to make a joke of it. Whenever Niall tries to bring this up he always avoids. They need to talk about it, he needs to understand how sorry Niall is. 

"Lan, can we talk about this please? I feel so much guilt for what I asked you to do. I took advantage of the fact that you wanted to please me, i used your love for me."

"I can't talk about this Niall. I can move on and be your friend but I cannot drag it all back up again. I got over it. Please don't make me talk about it. You don't have to feel guilty. Yes it really sucked seeing that all play out again and it really fucking sucked that the people who seem to not like me got to have front row seats to it all. I'm going to kill Bethany for letting that all get out." Louis had said there were thousands of views already. Thousands of people had sat and watched that. 

"I am so sorry."

"Stop saying sorry Niall. I forgive you for what you done. It's not just your fault. I should have said no, I could have broke it off with you and had a bit more respect for myself but I didn't. It happened. I fell in love with you at the wrong time, you were messed up and it just happened to be me that got caught up in it. It happened and it's done and we do not need to talk about it anymore." Niall backs down quickly. He thinks it should be talked about but he also feels like he does not have the right to push Landon on the subject. Either he really was over it and just did not feel the need to discuss it or it still hurt to much to talk about. Niall hoped he was over it. He does not want to still be hurting him after all this time.

"Ok fine. It's done, I shall lock it in a box." Landon finally turns to Niall, eyes red and cheeks wet.

"Thank you." Niall steps forward and hugs him.

xxx

Harry stands in the kitchen watching out the window as Niall and Landon hug. Louis steps up beside him arms crossed over his chest. 

"It was him." Louis says nodding towards the window.

"I know. Niall won't believe us though. It was a smart move." 

"Remind him of all the good times."

"To make him feel even worse about the bad." Louis steps back.

"He is good at setting a trap." 

"Yeah he is. Too good." Harry glares out the window, teeth gritted. 

"Niall is walking right into it and he has no idea." 

Niall is sitting on the sofa, Landon's head in his lap as Niall see's how many Smarties he can balance on his face when Liam burst through the front door ball in hand. Landon jumps sending the smarties falling to the floor.

"Do you ever work?" Niall pouts, pushing Landon's head off him. 

"Yes actually, I done some shit this morning. Why are you not at work?" 

"Took the week off to spend time with Macy but she is busy today so thought we could spend the day together instead." Niall cheers jumping up from the sofa, holding his hand up for him to throw the ball. 

He is really proud of Liam for getting his job, even if working in advertisement sounded really boring to Niall, but it kind of sucked that it kept him so busy and they had hardly anytime to hang out properly. 

Liam throws the ball and Niall catches it easily and start throwing it back and forward in his hands. This is when he notices the bandage on Liam hand.

"What's up with that?" Liam holds his hand up, waggling his fingers.

"So I may have got another tattoo last night." Niall scrunched his face up.

"On your hand?"

"Yes on my hand, really hurt but looks so cool. And no you cannot see yet."

"That's mean. I cannot believe you disfigured you hand. What is wrong with a nice plain body Liam? It's probably your dad's fault you like this stuff. I just do not get it. I personally am very happy with my milky white skin and it shall stay that way. Gonna get all old and nasty and I shall laugh. Harry will probably actually freak about that one"

"Well you can just like suck his dick or something." Niall chokes on a laugh, Landon making some disgusted sound.

"So what? When it suits you we suddenly acknowledge that me and your dad are sexual with each other?" Liam nods, holding his thumbs up.

"Exactly right. So anyway I called Zayn on the way over and he said he might come over to, think him and Matt were fighting though so i'm not sure if he actually will." They head outside, Landon following and taking a seat to watch Niall and Liam kick the ball about. 

"Wonder what they could be fighting over. They never fight."

"Not sure but he sounded super worked up." Niall glanced over at Landon to see him typing away on his phone a smile on his face. Niall wonders if he could be texting a boy, he has not thought to ask if Landon was with anyone. 

"How have you and Macy been?" Liam beamed as he told Niall about the progress him and Macy had made since she moved back in. Now back in the same bed and everything, although she was still having issues being intimate with him. Who could blame her though, it was a tough one to deal with. 

"I don't really want to complain about it though, i just feel so bloody lucky to have her back with me think I would be a bit of a twat if I went around moaning that she wont sleep with me."

"Definitely mate. I'm sure you will get there eventually, just got to keep earning her trust. Maybe you should go on holiday, get away just the two of you. Would work let you take more time off?" Niall catches the ball with his feet then kicks it back. 

"Might do. I have not taken any holiday until now so they bloody should really. Working my bloody arse of for that company. I will have to see if Macy can get the time too and then-" The back door slams open cutting Liam off. Landon jumps in his seat and they all turn as Zayn comes charging out, fist clenched at his side. He stops a few feet away from Liam and Niall and lets out a frustrated yell that has Liam edging toward Niall. 

"What the hell?" Zayn's hair is all over the place, which is so unusual, and he looks like he is about to rip someone's head off. 

"Matthew. Fucking Matthew."

"Umm right. Matthew what? Were is Elliott?" It was also pretty unusual for there to be a Zayn without a Elliott attached to him. Zayn let's out a manic laugh and once again Liam edges closer to Niall. 

"My areshole of a husband has him because he has decided I can't be trusted with my own fucking kids right now." Zayn suddenly burst into tears and Niall and Liam both rush forward to pull him into a hug that is all soothing noises and stroking his hair and squeezing to tightly. 

"What happened to make him think that?" Liam asks pulling away and wiping at Zayns face.

"He found drugs." For a second Niall feels himself go a little dizzy, then its like someone threw cold water over him. He steps away from Zayn hand still wrapped around his arm.

"What?" Zayn wipes at his nose, sniffing into his sleeve.

"It's not mine. I swear I have not been getting any or taking them. He would know, everyone would fucking know if I was. He don't believe me and now he is talking about getting me back into rehab and keeping the kids away until I am better and fuck Niall, I'm not taking them I swear." 

"Were did he find them?" 

"This time he found them in my coat pocket. It's not the first time though, he found some a couple of days ago in my art bag and then the day before that he found some in my bedside table. I don't know how they are getting there but it's not me. If I had I would have told someone, I would want help and I would be honest. He wont let me near the kids and i'm not fucking doing them." Niall pulls him back into a hug. He had no idea what to even say to make Zayn feel better about this. The thought of drugs being so close to Zayn is horrible. What if he had found them instead of Matt, would he have been tempted to take them? 

He nearly died. Drugs nearly killed him before and Niall was not around for that and he does not ever, ever want to experience what that must have been like. 

"It my kids Ni. He said I can't see my kids until I am better. I'm already better. I have not done anything wrong. I cant- I can't be away from them." It doesn't make sense. How the hell do drugs get into Zayn's coat and bag and bloody bedside table. In his house. 

"What were they?" Zayn sniffs again, pushing his face into Niall shoulder.

"Pills in my bag and coat. But in my room was Heroin." Liam curses bringing himself back into the hug. 

"Promise me Z, promise me that I should not be worried right now."

"I promise. Please believe me. I don't want everyone to turn against me. Please don't make me go back, I have not taken anything. You would know. I can't hide anything from you." Niall leans back to look directly at Zayn, to see if there was any hint of a lie in his eyes.

"I don't lie to you Niall. I can't" He looks like he is being completely sincere. All Niall can sense from him is how scared he is, how upset and angry. Why does Matt not believe him? its as clear as day that Zayn is being honest. 

"I know, I believe you. We will have to talk to Matt. Let him clam down and then we will talk see if we can sort it out. We also have to work out how the hell drugs got into your house. What if one of the kids had found it." God, the thought of Rae finding pills in Zayn's coat and thinking they were sweets is somewhere his mind really does not want to go. 

"Yeah, yeah OK. He might listen to you. Both of you if you don't mind getting involved Li?"

"Of course I don't mind mate, its all really fucked up so of course I am going to help." Zayn gives him a grateful look. As much as the pair had kept a little hostility from High school they were always there for each other when things got shit. And this was about as shit as it could get for Zayn. 

"It's just so weird. Your coat and bag could have been tampered with outside the house. Someone panicking and wanting to get rid of them, but finding heroin in your bedside table is just baffling me. Someone would have had to go into your house to do that."

"I know. This is why I need Matt on my side. Someone must have done this on purpose right? They either wanted me to find it and take it or they wanted this exact thing to happen." Liam looks down at the ground, frowning. 

"Who though? You haven't pissed anyone off?" Zayn shakes his head, wiping at his nose. 

"What about Rae's real parents? Could they have tracked you down?" 

"No I don't think so. Rae got put in the system when she was only a few weeks old I don't think they would suddenly be interested after so many years. Even if it was there is no way for them to get in the house." Liam turns suddenly booting the ball back towards the house. Niall's eyes land on Landon. He had completely forgot about him being there and he was watching them with a curious look. 

"You know." Liam spoke up, hands resting on his hips. "This mixed with all the shit with Niall is adding up to be really fucking odd. You think someone was in the house a few nights ago right? No sign of a break in?"

"Well yeah but I lost my house key, I think they just simply unlocked the door and came in then locked it on the way out. Nothing has happened since we changed the locks." 

"Hey guys, is everything alright?" Landon is coming towards them, hands shoved into the pocket of his jumper. Zayn instantly goes stiff, face blank as he turns to him.

"It's family stuff." Niall moves towards Landon, moving them back towards the house.

"It's fine Lan, Zayn is just dealing with some stuff. It will get sorted. Let's go make everyone a drink, bloody cold init." Landon just nods, sending Zayn a small smile and letting Niall lead him back inside just as Zayn let out a squawk and a 'what he fuck did you do to your hand ? I want one'

xxxxxxx

Harry comes home and hour early to find Liam and Niall sprawled out on the sofa playing FIFA. Zayn is in the kitchen making himself a snack and Niall thinks Landon might be upstairs.

"Have I gone back in time? Are you both fourteen again?" Liam grunts, foot kicking out at Niall's hand to try and get him to drop the controller.

"Stop it! Cheat." Liam mimics him before answering Harry.

"No time travel i'm afraid. Still stuck in the time zone were you have to kiss Niall's stupid face." Niall pauses the game dodging out of the way of Liam foot as it swings towards him again. 

"Liam got his hand tattooed." 

"Oh maybe we have gone back in time you big baby."

"You got a tattoo on your hand?" Harry walks over to the sofa grabbing hold on Liam's wrist to pull his hand up to his face.

"Liam!" 

"What, you whole body is covered."

"Not my hand! Ouch." Zayn comes back into the room holding a sandwich in his hand.

"Its sick and I am totally getting one too." Harry ignores him, lifting the wrap on Liam's hand a little to peak under it.

"You know your mother would have had a few things to say about this. Would have blamed me too." Landon comes jogging down the stairs then, casting a look at Harry and Liam before sitting down on the armchair. Liam laughs taking his hand out of Harry's grip.

"Niall freaked at me and then said it was your fault. Niall is a mum." Niall pouts, slapping Liam on the back of the neck.

"Too right I am young man. So respect me bitch." Zayn pushes past their feet to sit down on the other side of Niall.

"You two are odd." Harry laughs at that quickly giving Niall his hello kiss before going into the kitchen. 

"You text Matt?" Zayn picks up Niall's controller, starting the game up again. 

"Yeah. The kids are going to his parents tonight and we are going to talk. Think he might have just gone into a panic so hopefully when he has settled down we can get it sorted." Niall places his hand on Zayn knee and give it a squeeze.

"I really hope so. Let me know if you want me to talk to him too." Zayn leans over to kiss the side of Niall's head, eye still on the game. 

Louis comes bursting though the door about ten minutes later just as Liam and Zayn start up a new game and Harry is walking back into the room with a cup of tea. 

"Holy fuck everyone! Holy fuck!" The game is paused again and everyone turns to Louis.

"What?"

"There is a YouTube video made up of some leaked footage of Niall and Landon. An anonymous profile has been made up and they have posted them." Niall swings round to face Landon who is looking back eyes wide.

"What kind of footage?" He asked standing up and walking of to Louis who has his phone out.

"I will put it up on the telly, Liam get this off."

"How did they get footage? I am so confused." Louis starts loading YouTube up on the TV. Harry places his mug down before tugging Niall back over to the sofa to sit with him, Zayn and Liam squashed at the end as Louis settles on the floor. Landon backs away a little. 

"I only watched a little before I left but I think it's pretty innocent stuff. It's already got loads of views, like thousands. Its crazy." Niall swallows, heart already pounding as the video starts to load, he has no idea what they could be about to watch. 

"I swear to god if i see Niall's penis I will cry." Louis swats at Liam shushing him. The video starts and Niall finds himself clinging onto Harry's hand. 

There is a lot of scuffling sounds then Niall's trainers come into the shot, the ones he used to wear everywhere and almost cried over when they broke. The camera pans up and then the back of Landon's head is the focus. Niall remembers it straight away. He filmed this during his second week in Venice when Landon was taking him to get some stuff for the restaurant. Niall looks over his shoulder at Landon who just gives him a weak smile before looking back at the screen. 

"You know this Niall?" Liam asks.

"Yeah, i filmed this on my old camera. I ended up giving it to Beth because she used it more then me."

"Is it always this crazy?" Landon turns to Niall, dimples on full display as he pushes thought the crowd.

"Yes! Bloody tourist everywhere. We are nearly there. Got to toughen up Horan! Don't be afraid to shove." Landon tuns back again and Niall mutters a 'shit' before he turns the camera on himself, blonde haired and grinning. 

"This place is bloody amazing." 

The video cuts off and the screen goes black for a second before another starts up. This time both Landon and Niall are in the shot together, filmed by Beth, and its dark. 

"So weird to see you with blonde hair." Harry whispers holding Niall's hand a little tighter. 

"So we have just got done taking Mr tourist here on a boat trip." 

"Excuse you Bethany, I think we can stop calling me a tourist now." 

Niall and Landon are both holding hands, swinging them back a forward like they wanted everyone who passed to notice. 

"Umm you just made us go and do the most touristy thing ever so no we can not stop calling you that can be Lan?" 

"The boat trips are pretty lame for us locals." The street behind them is empty and when Niall laughs it echos around them loudly. 

"Whatever guys. How long do I have to live here before I am classed as a local then?" Bethany hums, the camera shaking for a moment before she settles it again.

"I would say two years." Landon snorts, but then nods in agreement. Niall glances over at him shyly.

"Well, i might just have to stick around to find out what being a local is like."

Again the screen goes black and for a moment its just everyone looking at their reflection before the next one cuts in. This time its inside the restaurant and Niall really cant help but smile at the sight of it. It's empty and music is playing loudly, Niall's music, so it passed closing. 

Niall comes onto the screen dancing around with a mop, the sound of Landon's laughter can be heard behind the camera. 

"You are such an idiot."

"Shut up, I can dance really well." Niall does a shimmy, nearly drops the mop but manages to catch it and does a dip with it instead. 

"Smooth." Niall laughs, twirling around then suddenly vanishing from the screen. When he comes back he has a laughing Beth in his arms and they dance around together, Beth's head flung back as she lets Niall spin her around. 

"Ok stop! I'm going to be sick." Niall dips her and makes a big show of kissing her hand before putting her back upright and letting her go. 

"I will say it again, you are such an idiot." Niall walks towards the camera wiping at his forehead.

"Nah, your just jealous of my mean mopping and dancing skills. I would teach you but i'm afraid it a talent one must be born with." Landon snorts, and he leans forward pushing the camera even closer to Niall face.

"That or I am jealous that the mop and my sister got to dance with you and I didn't." The blush on Niall's face is instant and he lets out some kind of weird giggle before standing back up right.

"Whatever you. So what you teaching me tonight?" 

Zayn clears his throat when the video ends glancing towards Harry.

"We going to keep watching?" Niall opens his mouth to answer but Harry gets there first.

"Yes." Niall looks at him to try and work out what he is thinking. It's not really been too bad. Its probably clear in the videos that Niall is crushing on Landon but that is all. Now he knows the videos are coming from his old camera he knows nothing too bad will be on them. He just had to find out how they went from that to YouTube, and how to get it all taken down. 

When the next video plays Niall instantly recognises the scenery. Everyone must do actually because Landon and Niall are both stood in front of the Colosseum.

"No way." Landon moves closer. "This is when I took you to Rome." Niall can feel Harry staring at him but he ignores it to look at the screen. 

"Yeah, with Beth." He adds because he really wants Harry to know that it was not some romantic trip for him and Landon. Hopefully it makes up for the fact that most of the video shows Niall and Landon walking around holding hands and being all stupid by shoving ice cream in each other faces and looking on the verge of kissing the whole bloody time. Beth sure was good at catching all the moments on camera. By the end of that short video Harry is still holding Niall's hand but his grip has loosened and he is frowning. 

The next video is really short and just shows the outside of the restaurant after a flood. Beth is filming again and its just shows a few tourist out splashing in the water like idiots, Landon starting to clear up and off in the distance a little bit Niall is talking with Daisy. His heart leaps at the sight of her and suddenly he is grinning and leaning towards the television more. God he had really missed her. 

The next video is loud and starts of as a blur as beth is running with the camera. When she stops and holds it up both Niall and Landon start laughing.

"Girardino wedding." Niall looks up at Landon nodding to let him know he remembers.

Niall is wearing a ridiculous hat and it obviously very drunk, drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other. He does look really good in his suit though. Landon appears behind him wearing a matching hat and they both do some random dance. Beth joins in, camera jostling around and there is an occasional show of Daisy who is also dancing. 

"You look happy." Zayn comments, when Niall face come back into view cigarette now between his lip as he bobs about. 

"He was." Landon practically whispers. Harry lets out a breath and Niall thinks his grip gets even looser on him. The scene cuts to later in the wedding, now dark with fairy lights everywhere lighting the dance floor. A slow song is playing and Niall and Landon are the only ones on the dance floor with the bride and groom. Niall's head is on Landon's shoulder as the sway together, Landon's hand slowly moving up and down Niall's back. God, Niall can remember that night. He had been with them for over two months and he was really starting to like Landon by then. He can remember how nervous he got when Landon first asked him to dance, how much he enjoyed being in his arms. 

After that clip there are a few photos, like a slideshow. Pictures of Niall and Landon working. Side by side washing up, Landon stood nearby as Niall cleaned. Niall leaning over the counter as Landon explained to him about the food they were cooking. 

A picture of them at the beach, in swim shorts arms around each other. 

Asleep on the sofa, Niall's leg flung over Landon's waist and his face shoved under his armpit. 

Niall sat at the kitchen table helping Beth with school work, a confused frown on his face. 

Niall sat on his own, notebook and pen in hand looking content. 

Niall kissing Landon's cheek, hand up to cup his cheek and bring him closer. 

Niall and Landon kissing, Niall smiling into the kiss so much you can see his teeth. 

Harry lets go of his hand, leaning forward to rest his elbows in his knee.

"Why would someone make a video out of all this?" Louis asked looking over at Niall. Niall shrugs because honestly he has no idea. 

How did they even get it? He can only imagine Beth must have lost the camera at some point and someone found it and maybe recognised who Niall was? Or just thought it was cute and would get them some views. 

Another video starts and Niall is about to leap up to turn it off when Harry places his hand on his leg to keep him down. 

Landon is filming Niall from above. Niall is clearly naked, face and chest flushed red from sex. He looks up into the camera and laughs covering his face with his arm. 

"You know Beth will freak if she knows you are filming me like this." 

"Well it will teach the girl to stop stealing your stuff. Maybe we should get a dick shot." Niall yelps as Landon tugs on the blanket almost getting Niall's dick in the shot. Niall grips the blanket, playfully glaring up at Landon. 

"You look hot like this, can you blame me for wanting to document Niall Horan post sex." Niall rolls his eyes slapping at the camera. 

"You are such a twat. I don't know why I have sex with you."

"Because I am the bestest. Also I make you come like a hundred times."

"Lan! Seriously Beth will see this." Landon laughs.

"I will delete it don't worry. She wont know about my amazing cock sucking skills." Niall grones turning his head into the pillow. 

"Get off me."

"I shall not. Give me a sec because we are going again. Empty house and all that. But while we wait, tell me something."

"Like what?"

"Something I don't know. Like what are you running from? Why don't you want to go back home?" Niall's huffs out a laugh that sounds strained and forced as he gets up on his elbows.

"I'm not running. I just don't want to go home. Do you want me to?"

"No. Never. Just got a feeling there was something stopping you. Other then not wanting to leave my pretty face of course." Niall flops back onto the bed rolling his eyes. For a second it looks like he is going to says something but then he stops and just shrugs his shoulders. 

"Just don't want to be around the place I lost Ma is all. Nothing really to go back for anyway." 

"You think she would have liked me?" Niall smiles, reaching up.

"Yeah. You make me happy. That would have made her like you." The camera is placed down by the side of the bed and then Landon is leaning down to kiss Niall. He moves down to Niall's neck then kisses over his chest. 

"Hey you. I'm not making a sex tape on the device your sister uses." Landon looks up and smirk, going lower and lower down Niall body.

"Better turn it off real quick then." Landon dissapears and Niall is letting out a quite gasp before leaning over to switch it off. 

The atmosphere in the room is so tense. Niall closes his eyes.

"You didn't delete it." 

"Nothing to go home for?" Niall cant look at Harry. He feels so shit that Harry had to just see that when he knows how much he struggles with his and Landon's past relationship. Liam, Zayn and Louis are also avoided eye contact and the whole thing just feels horrible.

Another video starts and Niall feels sick. He just wants it to stop. This time it's filmed through a small crack in the door of Landons bedroom and it has Landon up and out of his seat in a flash.

"Turn it off." His voice shakes, nobody moves. They all seem frozen as they watch. 

"Why was she filming this?" 

Niall is sat at the head of the bed, bedsheets pulled all the way up to his neck. Landon is sat on the end wearing just a pair of boxers. He is bent over looking down at the floor. 

"We should turn it off." Niall says. He remembers this day so clearly. Everything went downhill after this day. It all went toxic and Niall hates himself so much for the way he messed with Landon. Again nobody moves.

"Why can't I be enough?"

"You are. Your are enough. You always are." Landon shakes his head, running a hand over his hair then looking up. 

"You said his name. Your have never looked at me like that before and I thought... you said his name." 

"I'm sorry."

"Your sorry? You were thinking of him." Niall starts to cry, head falling down into his hands.

"You don't get to cry." Landon stands up spinning around to face Niall. "You don't get to fucking cry. Were you thinking of him?"

"Yes."

"Do you always think of him?" When Niall does not answer Landon crawls up the bed grabbing at his chin and yanking his face up. "Do you always think of him?" 

"Yes." Landon drops his face, getting back off the bed. 

"When you told me about him I thought you had gotten over him but it's all still about him. Everything is about Harry." Niall's body jolts at the name and he is up and out of bed in a second shoving his hands into Landon's chest and pushing him.

"Don't say his fucking name." Landon stumbles back into the wall and Beth gasps.

"You always act like his name is this terrible thing. You can talk about it but God forbid we say his name. Until i'm fucking you that is, then apparently its all Harry, Harry, Harry. Well fuck him because he left you and he did not want you." Niall slaps Landon across the face. 

"You don't say his name. You don't fucking say it." Niall sobs falling back down onto the bed hand over his mouth. Landon sits down next to him, hand covering his cheek. They both stay silent for a while, just the sound of Niall crying. 

"Is that what you need?" Landon speaks up, head bowed down.

"What?" 

"You need me to be him? You need to pretend I am him so you can trick yourself in to believing you still have him?" There is silence then...

"Yes." Landon nods, face screwing up like he is about to cry.

"I'm in love with you."

"I know."

"Will you ever stop loving him?"

"No."

"Could you ever love me? Eventually."

"No." 

"Then fine. I will give you what you need. I will be him for you. You say his name all you want, I can deal with it."

"Lan-"

"I can fucking deal with it. Just let me love you how I want to love you. This is what we are doing. I can be him." Landon gets up and starts to get dressed. 

"I'm so sorry Landon. I don't want to hurt you."

"Yeah well." Landon pulls a jumper on keeping his face turned away from where Niall is sitting on the bed. "I just want some space for a bit. We don't need to talk about this anymore." Landon walks towards the door and Beth lets out another gasp then is running down the hallway before turning the camera off. 

The video ends and nobody moves for what fees like hours. Niall eventually looks up at Landon. His face is white, his eyes shimmering and then he turns and leaves the room the back door opening and slamming shut.

"I should-I should go check on him." Harry nods, moving so Niall can get up. 

"Are you ok Harry?" Harry nods again, but he wont look at Niall and his bottom lip is pulled in so tight the skin around it has gone white.

"Harry-"

"Go check on him. That must have been hard for him." 

"You too." Harry laughs shaking his head.

"Just go." Niall looks up at the others. Louis motions for Niall to go so he does. 

It's turned even colder outside and Niall had not thought to put shoes on so he trudges across the grass feet soaked through in seconds. He doesn't talk at first, just hovers behind Landon feeling beyond awkward and so terrible guilty for what he started that day. 

"I'm sorry you had to watch that." Landon breaths in before letting it out again. 

"Yeah well, should have known the little weasel was probably filming us right?" Niall does not like that Landon is trying to make a joke of it. Whenever Niall tries to bring this up he always avoids. They need to talk about it, he needs to understand how sorry Niall is. 

"Lan, can we talk about this please? I feel so much guilt for what I asked you to do. I took advantage of the fact that you wanted to please me, i used your love for me."

"I can't talk about this Niall. I can move on and be your friend but I cannot drag it all back up again. I got over it. Please don't make me talk about it. You don't have to feel guilty. Yes it really sucked seeing that all play out again and it really fucking sucked that the people who seem to not like me got to have front row seats to it all. I'm going to kill Bethany for letting that all get out." Louis had said there were thousands of views already. Thousands of people had sat and watched that. 

"I am so sorry."

"Stop saying sorry Niall. I forgive you for what you done. It's not just your fault. I should have said no, I could have broke it off with you and had a bit more respect for myself but I didn't. It happened. I fell in love with you at the wrong time, you were messed up and it just happened to be me that got caught up in it. It happened and it's done and we do not need to talk about it anymore." Niall backs down quickly. He thinks it should be talked about but he also feels like he does not have the right to push Landon on the subject. Either he really was over it and just did not feel the need to discuss it or it still hurt to much to talk about. Niall hoped he was over it. He does not want to still be hurting him after all this time.

"Ok fine. It's done, I shall lock it in a box." Landon finally turns to Niall, eyes red and cheeks wet.

"Thank you." Niall steps forward and hugs him.

xxx

Harry stands in the kitchen watching out the window as Niall and Landon hug. Louis steps up beside him arms crossed over his chest. 

"It was him." Louis says nodding towards the window.

"I know. Niall won't believe us though. It was a smart move." 

"Remind him of all the good times."

"To make him feel even worse about the bad." Louis steps back.

"He is good at setting a trap." 

"Yeah he is. Too good." Harry glares out the window, teeth gritted. 

"Niall is walking right into it and he has no idea." 

Niall is sitting on the sofa, Landon's head in his lap as Niall see's how many Smarties he can balance on his face when Liam burst through the front door ball in hand. Landon jumps sending the smarties falling to the floor.

"Do you ever work?" Niall pouts, pushing Landon's head off him. 

"Yes actually, I done some shit this morning. Why are you not at work?" 

"Took the week off to spend time with Macy but she is busy today so thought we could spend the day together instead." Niall cheers jumping up from the sofa, holding his hand up for him to throw the ball. 

He is really proud of Liam for getting his job, even if working in advertisement sounded really boring to Niall, but it kind of sucked that it kept him so busy and they had hardly anytime to hang out properly. 

Liam throws the ball and Niall catches it easily and start throwing it back and forward in his hands. This is when he notices the bandage on Liam hand.

"What's up with that?" Liam holds his hand up, waggling his fingers.

"So I may have got another tattoo last night." Niall scrunched his face up.

"On your hand?"

"Yes on my hand, really hurt but looks so cool. And no you cannot see yet."

"That's mean. I cannot believe you disfigured you hand. What is wrong with a nice plain body Liam? It's probably your dad's fault you like this stuff. I just do not get it. I personally am very happy with my milky white skin and it shall stay that way. Gonna get all old and nasty and I shall laugh. Harry will probably actually freak about that one"

"Well you can just like suck his dick or something." Niall chokes on a laugh, Landon making some disgusted sound.

"So what? When it suits you we suddenly acknowledge that me and your dad are sexual with each other?" Liam nods, holding his thumbs up.

"Exactly right. So anyway I called Zayn on the way over and he said he might come over to, think him and Matt were fighting though so i'm not sure if he actually will." They head outside, Landon following and taking a seat to watch Niall and Liam kick the ball about. 

"Wonder what they could be fighting over. They never fight."

"Not sure but he sounded super worked up." Niall glanced over at Landon to see him typing away on his phone a smile on his face. Niall wonders if he could be texting a boy, he has not thought to ask if Landon was with anyone. 

"How have you and Macy been?" Liam beamed as he told Niall about the progress him and Macy had made since she moved back in. Now back in the same bed and everything, although she was still having issues being intimate with him. Who could blame her though, it was a tough one to deal with. 

"I don't really want to complain about it though, i just feel so bloody lucky to have her back with me think I would be a bit of a twat if I went around moaning that she wont sleep with me."

"Definitely mate. I'm sure you will get there eventually, just got to keep earning her trust. Maybe you should go on holiday, get away just the two of you. Would work let you take more time off?" Niall catches the ball with his feet then kicks it back. 

"Might do. I have not taken any holiday until now so they bloody should really. Working my bloody arse of for that company. I will have to see if Macy can get the time too and then-" The back door slams open cutting Liam off. Landon jumps in his seat and they all turn as Zayn comes charging out, fist clenched at his side. He stops a few feet away from Liam and Niall and lets out a frustrated yell that has Liam edging toward Niall. 

"What the hell?" Zayn's hair is all over the place, which is so unusual, and he looks like he is about to rip someone's head off. 

"Matthew. Fucking Matthew."

"Umm right. Matthew what? Were is Elliott?" It was also pretty unusual for there to be a Zayn without a Elliott attached to him. Zayn let's out a manic laugh and once again Liam edges closer to Niall. 

"My areshole of a husband has him because he has decided I can't be trusted with my own fucking kids right now." Zayn suddenly burst into tears and Niall and Liam both rush forward to pull him into a hug that is all soothing noises and stroking his hair and squeezing to tightly. 

"What happened to make him think that?" Liam asks pulling away and wiping at Zayns face.

"He found drugs." For a second Niall feels himself go a little dizzy, then its like someone threw cold water over him. He steps away from Zayn hand still wrapped around his arm.

"What?" Zayn wipes at his nose, sniffing into his sleeve.

"It's not mine. I swear I have not been getting any or taking them. He would know, everyone would fucking know if I was. He don't believe me and now he is talking about getting me back into rehab and keeping the kids away until I am better and fuck Niall, I'm not taking them I swear." 

"Were did he find them?" 

"This time he found them in my coat pocket. It's not the first time though, he found some a couple of days ago in my art bag and then the day before that he found some in my bedside table. I don't know how they are getting there but it's not me. If I had I would have told someone, I would want help and I would be honest. He wont let me near the kids and i'm not fucking doing them." Niall pulls him back into a hug. He had no idea what to even say to make Zayn feel better about this. The thought of drugs being so close to Zayn is horrible. What if he had found them instead of Matt, would he have been tempted to take them? 

He nearly died. Drugs nearly killed him before and Niall was not around for that and he does not ever, ever want to experience what that must have been like. 

"It my kids Ni. He said I can't see my kids until I am better. I'm already better. I have not done anything wrong. I cant- I can't be away from them." It doesn't make sense. How the hell do drugs get into Zayn's coat and bag and bloody bedside table. In his house. 

"What were they?" Zayn sniffs again, pushing his face into Niall shoulder.

"Pills in my bag and coat. But in my room was Heroin." Liam curses bringing himself back into the hug. 

"Promise me Z, promise me that I should not be worried right now."

"I promise. Please believe me. I don't want everyone to turn against me. Please don't make me go back, I have not taken anything. You would know. I can't hide anything from you." Niall leans back to look directly at Zayn, to see if there was any hint of a lie in his eyes.

"I don't lie to you Niall. I can't" He looks like he is being completely sincere. All Niall can sense from him is how scared he is, how upset and angry. Why does Matt not believe him? its as clear as day that Zayn is being honest. 

"I know, I believe you. We will have to talk to Matt. Let him clam down and then we will talk see if we can sort it out. We also have to work out how the hell drugs got into your house. What if one of the kids had found it." God, the thought of Rae finding pills in Zayn's coat and thinking they were sweets is somewhere his mind really does not want to go. 

"Yeah, yeah OK. He might listen to you. Both of you if you don't mind getting involved Li?"

"Of course I don't mind mate, its all really fucked up so of course I am going to help." Zayn gives him a grateful look. As much as the pair had kept a little hostility from High school they were always there for each other when things got shit. And this was about as shit as it could get for Zayn. 

"It's just so weird. Your coat and bag could have been tampered with outside the house. Someone panicking and wanting to get rid of them, but finding heroin in your bedside table is just baffling me. Someone would have had to go into your house to do that."

"I know. This is why I need Matt on my side. Someone must have done this on purpose right? They either wanted me to find it and take it or they wanted this exact thing to happen." Liam looks down at the ground, frowning. 

"Who though? You haven't pissed anyone off?" Zayn shakes his head, wiping at his nose. 

"What about Rae's real parents? Could they have tracked you down?" 

"No I don't think so. Rae got put in the system when she was only a few weeks old I don't think they would suddenly be interested after so many years. Even if it was there is no way for them to get in the house." Liam turns suddenly booting the ball back towards the house. Niall's eyes land on Landon. He had completely forgot about him being there and he was watching them with a curious look. 

"You know." Liam spoke up, hands resting on his hips. "This mixed with all the shit with Niall is adding up to be really fucking odd. You think someone was in the house a few nights ago right? No sign of a break in?"

"Well yeah but I lost my house key, I think they just simply unlocked the door and came in then locked it on the way out. Nothing has happened since we changed the locks." 

"Hey guys, is everything alright?" Landon is coming towards them, hands shoved into the pocket of his jumper. Zayn instantly goes stiff, face blank as he turns to him.

"It's family stuff." Niall moves towards Landon, moving them back towards the house.

"It's fine Lan, Zayn is just dealing with some stuff. It will get sorted. Let's go make everyone a drink, bloody cold init." Landon just nods, sending Zayn a small smile and letting Niall lead him back inside just as Zayn let out a squawk and a 'what he fuck did you do to your hand ? I want one'

xxxxxxx

Harry comes home and hour early to find Liam and Niall sprawled out on the sofa playing FIFA. Zayn is in the kitchen making himself a snack and Niall thinks Landon might be upstairs.

"Have I gone back in time? Are you both fourteen again?" Liam grunts, foot kicking out at Niall's hand to try and get him to drop the controller.

"Stop it! Cheat." Liam mimics him before answering Harry.

"No time travel i'm afraid. Still stuck in the time zone were you have to kiss Niall's stupid face." Niall pauses the game dodging out of the way of Liam foot as it swings towards him again. 

"Liam got his hand tattooed." 

"Oh maybe we have gone back in time you big baby."

"You got a tattoo on your hand?" Harry walks over to the sofa grabbing hold on Liam's wrist to pull his hand up to his face.

"Liam!" 

"What, you whole body is covered."

"Not my hand! Ouch." Zayn comes back into the room holding a sandwich in his hand.

"Its sick and I am totally getting one too." Harry ignores him, lifting the wrap on Liam's hand a little to peak under it.

"You know your mother would have had a few things to say about this. Would have blamed me too." Landon comes jogging down the stairs then, casting a look at Harry and Liam before sitting down on the armchair. Liam laughs taking his hand out of Harry's grip.

"Niall freaked at me and then said it was your fault. Niall is a mum." Niall pouts, slapping Liam on the back of the neck.

"Too right I am young man. So respect me bitch." Zayn pushes past their feet to sit down on the other side of Niall.

"You two are odd." Harry laughs at that quickly giving Niall his hello kiss before going into the kitchen. 

"You text Matt?" Zayn picks up Niall's controller, starting the game up again. 

"Yeah. The kids are going to his parents tonight and we are going to talk. Think he might have just gone into a panic so hopefully when he has settled down we can get it sorted." Niall places his hand on Zayn knee and give it a squeeze.

"I really hope so. Let me know if you want me to talk to him too." Zayn leans over to kiss the side of Niall's head, eye still on the game. 

Louis comes bursting though the door about ten minutes later just as Liam and Zayn start up a new game and Harry is walking back into the room with a cup of tea. 

"Holy fuck everyone! Holy fuck!" The game is paused again and everyone turns to Louis.

"What?"

"There is a YouTube video made up of some leaked footage of Niall and Landon. An anonymous profile has been made up and they have posted them." Niall swings round to face Landon who is looking back eyes wide.

"What kind of footage?" He asked standing up and walking of to Louis who has his phone out.

"I will put it up on the telly, Liam get this off."

"How did they get footage? I am so confused." Louis starts loading YouTube up on the TV. Harry places his mug down before tugging Niall back over to the sofa to sit with him, Zayn and Liam squashed at the end as Louis settles on the floor. Landon backs away a little. 

"I only watched a little before I left but I think it's pretty innocent stuff. It's already got loads of views, like thousands. Its crazy." Niall swallows, heart already pounding as the video starts to load, he has no idea what they could be about to watch. 

"I swear to god if i see Niall's penis I will cry." Louis swats at Liam shushing him. The video starts and Niall finds himself clinging onto Harry's hand. 

There is a lot of scuffling sounds then Niall's trainers come into the shot, the ones he used to wear everywhere and almost cried over when they broke. The camera pans up and then the back of Landon's head is the focus. Niall remembers it straight away. He filmed this during his second week in Venice when Landon was taking him to get some stuff for the restaurant. Niall looks over his shoulder at Landon who just gives him a weak smile before looking back at the screen. 

"You know this Niall?" Liam asks.

"Yeah, i filmed this on my old camera. I ended up giving it to Beth because she used it more then me."

"Is it always this crazy?" Landon turns to Niall, dimples on full display as he pushes thought the crowd.

"Yes! Bloody tourist everywhere. We are nearly there. Got to toughen up Horan! Don't be afraid to shove." Landon tuns back again and Niall mutters a 'shit' before he turns the camera on himself, blonde haired and grinning. 

"This place is bloody amazing." 

The video cuts off and the screen goes black for a second before another starts up. This time both Landon and Niall are in the shot together, filmed by Beth, and its dark. 

"So weird to see you with blonde hair." Harry whispers holding Niall's hand a little tighter. 

"So we have just got done taking Mr tourist here on a boat trip." 

"Excuse you Bethany, I think we can stop calling me a tourist now." 

Niall and Landon are both holding hands, swinging them back a forward like they wanted everyone who passed to notice. 

"Umm you just made us go and do the most touristy thing ever so no we can not stop calling you that can be Lan?" 

"The boat trips are pretty lame for us locals." The street behind them is empty and when Niall laughs it echos around them loudly. 

"Whatever guys. How long do I have to live here before I am classed as a local then?" Bethany hums, the camera shaking for a moment before she settles it again.

"I would say two years." Landon snorts, but then nods in agreement. Niall glances over at him shyly.

"Well, i might just have to stick around to find out what being a local is like."

Again the screen goes black and for a moment its just everyone looking at their reflection before the next one cuts in. This time its inside the restaurant and Niall really cant help but smile at the sight of it. It's empty and music is playing loudly, Niall's music, so it passed closing. 

Niall comes onto the screen dancing around with a mop, the sound of Landon's laughter can be heard behind the camera. 

"You are such an idiot."

"Shut up, I can dance really well." Niall does a shimmy, nearly drops the mop but manages to catch it and does a dip with it instead. 

"Smooth." Niall laughs, twirling around then suddenly vanishing from the screen. When he comes back he has a laughing Beth in his arms and they dance around together, Beth's head flung back as she lets Niall spin her around. 

"Ok stop! I'm going to be sick." Niall dips her and makes a big show of kissing her hand before putting her back upright and letting her go. 

"I will say it again, you are such an idiot." Niall walks towards the camera wiping at his forehead.

"Nah, your just jealous of my mean mopping and dancing skills. I would teach you but i'm afraid it a talent one must be born with." Landon snorts, and he leans forward pushing the camera even closer to Niall face.

"That or I am jealous that the mop and my sister got to dance with you and I didn't." The blush on Niall's face is instant and he lets out some kind of weird giggle before standing back up right.

"Whatever you. So what you teaching me tonight?" 

Zayn clears his throat when the video ends glancing towards Harry.

"We going to keep watching?" Niall opens his mouth to answer but Harry gets there first.

"Yes." Niall looks at him to try and work out what he is thinking. It's not really been too bad. Its probably clear in the videos that Niall is crushing on Landon but that is all. Now he knows the videos are coming from his old camera he knows nothing too bad will be on them. He just had to find out how they went from that to YouTube, and how to get it all taken down. 

When the next video plays Niall instantly recognises the scenery. Everyone must do actually because Landon and Niall are both stood in front of the Colosseum.

"No way." Landon moves closer. "This is when I took you to Rome." Niall can feel Harry staring at him but he ignores it to look at the screen. 

"Yeah, with Beth." He adds because he really wants Harry to know that it was not some romantic trip for him and Landon. Hopefully it makes up for the fact that most of the video shows Niall and Landon walking around holding hands and being all stupid by shoving ice cream in each other faces and looking on the verge of kissing the whole bloody time. Beth sure was good at catching all the moments on camera. By the end of that short video Harry is still holding Niall's hand but his grip has loosened and he is frowning. 

The next video is really short and just shows the outside of the restaurant after a flood. Beth is filming again and its just shows a few tourist out splashing in the water like idiots, Landon starting to clear up and off in the distance a little bit Niall is talking with Daisy. His heart leaps at the sight of her and suddenly he is grinning and leaning towards the television more. God he had really missed her. 

The next video is loud and starts of as a blur as beth is running with the camera. When she stops and holds it up both Niall and Landon start laughing.

"Girardino wedding." Niall looks up at Landon nodding to let him know he remembers.

Niall is wearing a ridiculous hat and it obviously very drunk, drink in one hand and a cigarette in the other. He does look really good in his suit though. Landon appears behind him wearing a matching hat and they both do some random dance. Beth joins in, camera jostling around and there is an occasional show of Daisy who is also dancing. 

"You look happy." Zayn comments, when Niall face come back into view cigarette now between his lip as he bobs about. 

"He was." Landon practically whispers. Harry lets out a breath and Niall thinks his grip gets even looser on him. The scene cuts to later in the wedding, now dark with fairy lights everywhere lighting the dance floor. A slow song is playing and Niall and Landon are the only ones on the dance floor with the bride and groom. Niall's head is on Landon's shoulder as the sway together, Landon's hand slowly moving up and down Niall's back. God, Niall can remember that night. He had been with them for over two months and he was really starting to like Landon by then. He can remember how nervous he got when Landon first asked him to dance, how much he enjoyed being in his arms. 

After that clip there are a few photos, like a slideshow. Pictures of Niall and Landon working. Side by side washing up, Landon stood nearby as Niall cleaned. Niall leaning over the counter as Landon explained to him about the food they were cooking. 

A picture of them at the beach, in swim shorts arms around each other. 

Asleep on the sofa, Niall's leg flung over Landon's waist and his face shoved under his armpit. 

Niall sat at the kitchen table helping Beth with school work, a confused frown on his face. 

Niall sat on his own, notebook and pen in hand looking content. 

Niall kissing Landon's cheek, hand up to cup his cheek and bring him closer. 

Niall and Landon kissing, Niall smiling into the kiss so much you can see his teeth. 

Harry lets go of his hand, leaning forward to rest his elbows in his knee.

"Why would someone make a video out of all this?" Louis asked looking over at Niall. Niall shrugs because honestly he has no idea. 

How did they even get it? He can only imagine Beth must have lost the camera at some point and someone found it and maybe recognised who Niall was? Or just thought it was cute and would get them some views. 

Another video starts and Niall is about to leap up to turn it off when Harry places his hand on his leg to keep him down. 

Landon is filming Niall from above. Niall is clearly naked, face and chest flushed red from sex. He looks up into the camera and laughs covering his face with his arm. 

"You know Beth will freak if she knows you are filming me like this." 

"Well it will teach the girl to stop stealing your stuff. Maybe we should get a dick shot." Niall yelps as Landon tugs on the blanket almost getting Niall's dick in the shot. Niall grips the blanket, playfully glaring up at Landon. 

"You look hot like this, can you blame me for wanting to document Niall Horan post sex." Niall rolls his eyes slapping at the camera. 

"You are such a twat. I don't know why I have sex with you."

"Because I am the bestest. Also I make you come like a hundred times."

"Lan! Seriously Beth will see this." Landon laughs.

"I will delete it don't worry. She wont know about my amazing cock sucking skills." Niall grones turning his head into the pillow. 

"Get off me."

"I shall not. Give me a sec because we are going again. Empty house and all that. But while we wait, tell me something."

"Like what?"

"Something I don't know. Like what are you running from? Why don't you want to go back home?" Niall's huffs out a laugh that sounds strained and forced as he gets up on his elbows.

"I'm not running. I just don't want to go home. Do you want me to?"

"No. Never. Just got a feeling there was something stopping you. Other then not wanting to leave my pretty face of course." Niall flops back onto the bed rolling his eyes. For a second it looks like he is going to says something but then he stops and just shrugs his shoulders. 

"Just don't want to be around the place I lost Ma is all. Nothing really to go back for anyway." 

"You think she would have liked me?" Niall smiles, reaching up.

"Yeah. You make me happy. That would have made her like you." The camera is placed down by the side of the bed and then Landon is leaning down to kiss Niall. He moves down to Niall's neck then kisses over his chest. 

"Hey you. I'm not making a sex tape on the device your sister uses." Landon looks up and smirk, going lower and lower down Niall body.

"Better turn it off real quick then." Landon dissapears and Niall is letting out a quite gasp before leaning over to switch it off. 

The atmosphere in the room is so tense. Niall closes his eyes.

"You didn't delete it." 

"Nothing to go home for?" Niall cant look at Harry. He feels so shit that Harry had to just see that when he knows how much he struggles with his and Landon's past relationship. Liam, Zayn and Louis are also avoided eye contact and the whole thing just feels horrible.

Another video starts and Niall feels sick. He just wants it to stop. This time it's filmed through a small crack in the door of Landons bedroom and it has Landon up and out of his seat in a flash.

"Turn it off." His voice shakes, nobody moves. They all seem frozen as they watch. 

"Why was she filming this?" 

Niall is sat at the head of the bed, bedsheets pulled all the way up to his neck. Landon is sat on the end wearing just a pair of boxers. He is bent over looking down at the floor. 

"We should turn it off." Niall says. He remembers this day so clearly. Everything went downhill after this day. It all went toxic and Niall hates himself so much for the way he messed with Landon. Again nobody moves.

__"Why can't I be enough?"

"You are. Your are enough. You always are." Landon shakes his head, running a hand over his hair then looking up. 

"You said his name. Your have never looked at me like that before and I thought... you said his name." 

"I'm sorry."

"Your sorry? You were thinking of him." Niall starts to cry, head falling down into his hands.

"You don't get to cry." Landon stands up spinning around to face Niall. "You don't get to fucking cry. Were you thinking of him?"

"Yes."

"Do you always think of him?" When Niall does not answer Landon crawls up the bed grabbing at his chin and yanking his face up. "Do you always think of him?" 

"Yes." Landon drops his face, getting back off the bed. 

"When you told me about him I thought you had gotten over him but it's all still about him. Everything is about Harry." Niall's body jolts at the name and he is up and out of bed in a second shoving his hands into Landon's chest and pushing him.

"Don't say his fucking name." Landon stumbles back into the wall and Beth gasps.

"You always act like his name is this terrible thing. You can talk about it but God forbid we say his name. Until i'm fucking you that is, then apparently its all Harry, Harry, Harry. Well fuck him because he left you and he did not want you." Niall slaps Landon across the face. 

"You don't say his name. You don't fucking say it." Niall sobs falling back down onto the bed hand over his mouth. Landon sits down next to him, hand covering his cheek. They both stay silent for a while, just the sound of Niall crying. 

"Is that what you need?" Landon speaks up, head bowed down.

"What?" 

"You need me to be him? You need to pretend I am him so you can trick yourself in to believing you still have him?" There is silence then...

"Yes." Landon nods, face screwing up like he is about to cry.

"I'm in love with you."

"I know."

"Will you ever stop loving him?"

"No."

"Could you ever love me? Eventually."

"No." 

"Then fine. I will give you what you need. I will be him for you. You say his name all you want, I can deal with it."

"Lan-"

"I can fucking deal with it. Just let me love you how I want to love you. This is what we are doing. I can be him." Landon gets up and starts to get dressed. 

"I'm so sorry Landon. I don't want to hurt you."

"Yeah well." Landon pulls a jumper on keeping his face turned away from where Niall is sitting on the bed. "I just want some space for a bit. We don't need to talk about this anymore." Landon walks towards the door and Beth lets out another gasp then is running down the hallway before turning the camera off. __

The video ends and nobody moves for what fees like hours. Niall eventually looks up at Landon. His face is white, his eyes shimmering and then he turns and leaves the room the back door opening and slamming shut.

"I should-I should go check on him." Harry nods, moving so Niall can get up. 

"Are you ok Harry?" Harry nods again, but he wont look at Niall and his bottom lip is pulled in so tight the skin around it has gone white.

"Harry-"

"Go check on him. That must have been hard for him." 

"You too." Harry laughs shaking his head.

"Just go." Niall looks up at the others. Louis motions for Niall to go so he does. 

It's turned even colder outside and Niall had not thought to put shoes on so he trudges across the grass feet soaked through in seconds. He doesn't talk at first, just hovers behind Landon feeling beyond awkward and so terrible guilty for what he started that day. 

"I'm sorry you had to watch that." Landon breaths in before letting it out again. 

"Yeah well, should have known the little weasel was probably filming us right?" Niall does not like that Landon is trying to make a joke of it. Whenever Niall tries to bring this up he always avoids. They need to talk about it, he needs to understand how sorry Niall is. 

"Lan, can we talk about this please? I feel so much guilt for what I asked you to do. I took advantage of the fact that you wanted to please me, i used your love for me."

"I can't talk about this Niall. I can move on and be your friend but I cannot drag it all back up again. I got over it. Please don't make me talk about it. You don't have to feel guilty. Yes it really sucked seeing that all play out again and it really fucking sucked that the people who seem to not like me got to have front row seats to it all. I'm going to kill Bethany for letting that all get out." Louis had said there were thousands of views already. Thousands of people had sat and watched that. 

"I am so sorry."

"Stop saying sorry Niall. I forgive you for what you done. It's not just your fault. I should have said no, I could have broke it off with you and had a bit more respect for myself but I didn't. It happened. I fell in love with you at the wrong time, you were messed up and it just happened to be me that got caught up in it. It happened and it's done and we do not need to talk about it anymore." Niall backs down quickly. He thinks it should be talked about but he also feels like he does not have the right to push Landon on the subject. Either he really was over it and just did not feel the need to discuss it or it still hurt to much to talk about. Niall hoped he was over it. He does not want to still be hurting him after all this time.

"Ok fine. It's done, I shall lock it in a box." Landon finally turns to Niall, eyes red and cheeks wet.

"Thank you." Niall steps forward and hugs him.

xxx

Harry stands in the kitchen watching out the window as Niall and Landon hug. Louis steps up beside him arms crossed over his chest. 

"It was him." Louis says nodding towards the window.

"I know. Niall won't believe us though. It was a smart move." 

"Remind him of all the good times."

"To make him feel even worse about the bad." Louis steps back.

"He is good at setting a trap." 

"Yeah he is. Too good." Harry glares out the window, teeth gritted. 

"Niall is walking right into it and he has no idea."


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a random unplanned chapter. Some people on another site I post on wanted some Narry fluff so I just went with it.

Niall spends two hours on the phone to his agent early the next morning. The video has been removed and the account suspended but there were more then a million views by that point. A couple of big stores had reduced their order amount for the new book and a couple of venues on the book tour had pulled out.

Nothing too major as Niall had been made to look like a heartless selfish prick to more then a million people.

He should count himself lucky apparently.

So after two hours of people talking to him like it was his fault and like he posted the bloody video himself he was in a rotten mood.

Harry took one look at his face when he came down the stairs then bundled him up in his coat and gloves before dragging him out the door after shouting a bye to Landon. Wherever he was in the house.

"Where we going?"

"You are getting some fresh air with some fantastic company. Clear your head a bit. Then we can get some breakfast together"

"You're supposed to be at work." Harry Tutted, bringing Niall in closer to him so he can walk with his arm around his waist.

"Not important. Wanted to be at home with you today." Niall rests his head on Harry's shoulder, not caring in the slightest that it made walking a harder task. He just wanted to be touching him as much as possible.

"How are you? You didn't talk much to me last night. You feeling alright after seeing the video?" Harry looked down at him, smiling a smile that didn't quite bring out his dimples.

"I'm fine. It's not like I didn't know you two were like happy together at one point. Just feel bad that everyone saw the bad bit" Niall reaches for Harry's hand and squeezed it before linking their fingers together. They must look ridiculous he thinks, walking aimlessly down the road all tangled up like a human pretzel.

They slow down when they reach town so they can look in shop windows before walking into the first cafe they come across both ordering a greasy fry up.

Niall quickly sends a text off to Landon to let him know him and Harry are having some time together before slipping his phone away so he can focus on just Harry, something he knows he has not been that good at just lately. 

"You getting excited about the book release?" Harry asks, slurping on his milkshake. Niall eyes the way his lips wrap around the straw and his cheek hollow out as he sucks before nodding.

"Yeah just nervous, especially now all this stuff with the video has happened. Its an important book so kinda sucks i'm getting so called 'bad press' right before it comes out." Harry gives him a sympathetic look, reaching across the table to hold his hands.

"It will be fine baby, your team said you were getting good support on social media. People obviously like you enough to stick up for you so they will still buy the book." Niall shrugs, not really convinced. If he was getting as much support as they say then why had they put him on a social media ban? Surely they would want him to see the nice things the fans are saying. 

"Maybe, we will just have to wait and see. Book release party is still going ahead like normal, I think Sonya is getting our suits sent over tomorrow. That I am excited for because everyone gets to drink too much and we all need a good laugh i think." A waitress comes over with their food, pausing for a second to look at Niall like she is about to say something but just turns to leave instead. Harry watches her until she goes into the back eyes narrowed and lips pursed out.

"Alright there?" Niall chuckles as Harry turns back to him a sheepish look on his face.

"Sorry, hate people looking at you like that. Don't know why I get so-possessive." Niall just smiles cutting up some bacon before shoving it in his mouth.

"S'alright I reckon. I like it. I like belonging to you." Harry makes a 'humpf' noise, scooping some beans onto his fork.

"Don't belong to me Ni, you are not my object so stop saying that. Just nobody else can have you is all." Niall never knows how to explain to Harry how much he likes to see himself as belonging to Harry. Being Harry's possession. Its a bit odd he guesses, but he was pretty sure that if Harry set out his clothes for him each morning and told him what to wear and where to go he would happily go along with it. He likes being his own person and being independent but at the same time he likes being under Harry's control. It was a very confusing mix of emotions. He loved it all the same.

"OK, if you say so. Can I have your mushrooms?"

"Only if I can have your tomato." Niall grins leaning over the table to stab at Harry's mushrooms before picking up his tomato and flinging it onto Harry's plate. 

"What we doing after this?" Niall asks around a mouthful of egg. "Don't really fancy going home. Could turn this into a date day. Can I buy you stuff?" Harry rolls his eyes dragging his milkshake back in front of him, tongue darting out in search of the straw. 

"Yes to the date day, no to the buying me things and we can do whatever you want." Niall pouts. He loves buying Harry stuff but he hardly let's Niall do it. He is so mean. 

"Fine spoil sport. We could just walk around and see what happens."

"Sounds nice baby." 

They have mostly small talk for the rest of breakfast. Harry filling Niall in on some of the things he has been getting up to with his kids at the school. Niall filling Harry in on the latest with Zayn and Liam which leads to them talking about the kids which then leads to them talking about when they have their own baby. They both walk out the cafe and hour later, wrapped around each other again both smiling and red cheeked as they talk nurseries and names.

Harry is bending down looking at jewellery so Niall takes a minute to check his phone. There is a couple of messages so he unlocks his phone, glancing up as Harry oooo's at something. 

"Want me to buy it?"

"No. Shut up." There are a couple of pictures on group chat. Louis had started it off by sending everyone a zoomed in picture of one of his students picking their nose with a message underneath saying 'my view right now'. Liam replied with his own photo of Macy curled up on the sofa reading a book 'my view is better then your view'. Zayn had sent one of his own reflection 'ain't no view better then this one'. Niall snorts shaking his head as he raises his phone up and snaps a picture of Harry's arse as he bends over. 

Niall: Sorry lads but I believe I have the best view right now. Fight me over it bitches. kiss kiss lovelies. 

There was another message from Landon.

Lan: Hey mate, that's cool I will just chill for a bit xxx

Niall: Cool x might be longer then just the morning having a bit of a date day. xxx 

Niall puts his phone away as Harry straightens up and reaches out for Niall's hand to start walking again. Niall stops them at a second hand book store and looks in at the display at the front window, before slipping inside and buying a couple of books. He comes back out swinging his bag and grinning as Harry slings an arm around his shoulder. 

"You always look so happy after buying books. So cute."

"I am a very cute person Harold."

"Oh I know." 

It was weird. With everything going on Niall felt like he had hardly spent time with Harry even though they had been doing plenty together. They were only ever truly alone at night time when they got into bed and both were too tired by that point to really talk, even though they still made time to have sex they were just falling asleep straight after. Niall can't really remember the last time they had time to just lay in bed and talk like they used to always do. They had always favored early nights cuddled up in bed talking then they did late nights watching telly. Talking less was a major problem for Niall and he can't quite understand how they had let it happen so easily. 

"Hey Harry?" Harry hummed to show he was listen, glancing in at a window of a charity shop that has some hideous shirts in the display.

"You think we have any chance of getting a hotel room right now?" Harry's head whips around, a cheeky smile on his face.

"Ooo really. Are we gonna to do some role play? Are you going to sit at the bar and I can come in all like 'whats a pretty boy like you doing at a place like this?'" Niall snorts shoving Harry's shoulder before getting his phone out of his pocket to look up the cheapest hotel room going right now.

"No. I was thinking more like nice hot bath together. Room service and not having to put clothes back on. You can totally suck my dick if you feel the need to." He bypasses the first two hotels that come up on his phone because he wants cheap but not get a life threatening illness from using the shower kind of cheap.

"There is one a few streets away with rooms going. Not supposed to check in until three but you could totally charm them into letting us in early."

"Are you suggesting i flirt with a stranger Niall?"

"Yes. Yes I am. Just get like one of your millions of nipples out and it will work a treat." .

"It's really cold."

"Then they will be extra perky. And I will warm them up with my mouth as soon as we are in the room." After that suggestion Harry is quick to get him and Niall to the hotel dashing off as soon as they are inside to work his magic.

Ten minutes later he comes back to Niall holding up the key card.   
"This is why you love me right, because I get us stuff with my nipples." Niall giggles snatching the key from Harry.   
"Definitely. Just the nipples." Harry laughs loudly snatching Niall's bag of books out of his hand and practically skipping to the lift. Once they are inside he pressed the number fifteen then leans against the glass wall. 

"This is nice. Doing something spontaneous, just the two of us. Almost forgot we can do stuff alone." Niall leans into him, laying his head on his shoulder.

"Yeah me too. Sorry I have been so shit the past few days."

"Hey, its me too. We have just been busy and distracted. Making up for it now though." Niall steps back when the lift dings and the doors slide open. Harry links their fingers leading Niall out and down the corridor to their room, shoving the key card into the slot. 

The room is small and simple. Just a double bed covered in white sheets, a dressing table and a door that leads to the bathroom. But its a room for just them and they are alone. 

"Now give me those cold nipples." Harry laughs unzipping his coat and throwing his hat off his head.

"You do know I did not actually get my nipples out right? That would probably be like sexual harassment." Niall still starts pushing Harry's top up as soon as his coat hits the floor.

"How did you get us in here early then?" Harry shivers, hand moving to cup the back of Niall's head as he wraps his lips around the nub of Harry's nipple, tongue sweeping out. 

"Hmm, she had your book on the desk, recognised me. Handed the key over as soon as i said it was a treat for you" Niall pulls of with a wet smack blowing on the wet skin before lowering Harry's top.

"Remind me to thank her. Now I would really like that bath." 

"I will go start it up, you get naked." Harry dumps Niall's shopping bag down on top of their coats then goes into the bathroom.

"I bloody love small toiletries" Niall laughs walking over to the window to look down at the traffic and people walking below. Everything looked so small and far away, like he and Harry really were away from the rest of the world. It was nice. He wished it could be like this all the time. That they did not need to step back into the real world by the end of the day.

He is drawn out of his little fantasy land by Harry's hand pushing up under the back of his top.

"You are not naked." Niall lifts his arms up as Harry pulls his top over his head, dropping it to the floor.

"Sorry, got distracted." He can feel Harry's bare chest against his back as he reaches around to unbutton Niall's jeans, kissing across his shoulder before crouching down to tug the tight material down Niall's legs helping him to step out of them and remove his socks. 

He kisses back up Niall's leg, pressing a few extra kisses onto the back of his knee before hooking his fingers into the waistband of his boxers and pulling them down and off. 

His lips leave another trail up his legs, fingers digging into the soft flesh of his hips as he licks and nibbles over the swell of his bum making Niall's eye flutter closed. 

"Much better. Ready for that bath baby?" Niall feels more ready to be laid out and thoroughly fucked but still he nods and curls his hand around Harry's to be led into the bathroom were a steaming bath full of bubbles waits for them.

Harry climbs in first opening his arms and his legs for Niall who eagerly clambers in making some of the water slosh over onto the floor as he lays back onto Harry's chest. 

"This was a good idea. Feel so much more relaxed already." Niall closes his eyes, head lolling to the side as Harry starts to soap up his chest. 

"Missed you." Harry's had pauses for a second before continuing, lips pressing to his temple. 

"I know. I missed you too. Been right there in front of each other but it doesn't really feel like it does it?" Niall leans his head into Harry's lips more before moving his head up so their lips meet. They keep it innocent. Closed mouthed and just small little pecks but it still sends jolt after jolt down Niall's body all the way to his toes. 

"Remember our first kiss?" Niall smiles against Harry's lips.

"How could I forget that. Waited so long for it, never been so frustrated in all my life." Harry laughs, bringing his legs up to curl around Niall's waist, both of them slipping down the tub a little,more water sloshing onto the floor. 

"God me too. I was so sacred." Niall turns in the bath, Harry letting his legs slide from his waist as Niall manoeuvred himself until he was straddling Harry's waist.

"What were you scared of?" He leaned forward until he is pressed fully to Harry, hand pushing into his damp hair. Harry let out a happy sigh, hand sliding up Niall's back.

"How strongly I felt for you already. How much kissing you could change things. I was terrified of Liam finding out. You weren't worried about all that?" Niall kisses Harry leaving his lips against his as he spoke.

"A little. Mostly I was just excited, happy. And I felt so lucky to be so young and already have found my person. I mean how lucky is it to find that so soon, I didn't have to kiss any frogs or date any arseholes I just got true love straight away." He moves from Harry's lips to kiss across his jaw and under the sweet spot by his ear making Harry shiver and hold him impossible closer.

"Lucky. Loved. Safe. That's all I have ever felt with you. I hate to think what would have happened if Liam didn't want us together. How different my life would have turned out." Harry's fingers danced up his spine before tangling in his hair to tilt his head back for a kiss. Opened mouthed, sucking Niall's tongue in to taste him properly. Niall rocks his hips slightly to feel Harry half hard against his stomach. Niall grips onto Harry's shoulders fingers digging in as he feels him grown harder, draws a soft moan from him as they slowly rock.

Harry pulls back, head falling to rest against the wall as he groaned eyes rolling down to try and see them under the bubbles.

"Technically you still had to kiss a few frogs before you got me back." Niall laughs, but it comes out as more of a shaky exhale as the tip of Harry's cock brushes against his own.

"Wouldn't call them frogs." Harry slaps his bum playfully glaring. Niall shakes his head kissing his chin.

"Had some terrible sex though, this one boy had a below average sized penis and I'm pretty sure that if he didn't start squeaking like a bloody hamster I would have had no idea he was even fucking me." Harry laughs loudly, the sound echoing around them and settling over Niall like a warm blanket.

"Oh god you poor thing. I'm sure he made up for it in other ways?" Niall bites his lips then shakes his head.

"Nope, terrible in all areas. Just a pretty face." Harry snots grinning widely. Niall pokes at his dimples keeping his finger there until Harry's smile settles.

"There was good sex though?" Harry bucks up into Niall harder. Niall raises his eyebrows because are they really talking about Niall sex life away from Harry while getting each other off.

"Yeah there was good sex. Boys with normal sized dicks. Knew what they were doing. Not you though. So that kinda sucked."

"Should think so too. Nobody knows what you like the way I do." Niall gasps, eyes snapping shut and his mouth falling open as Harry sneaks a finger between his cheeks pushing the tip of it into his hole.

"Nobody knows your body as well as me. Knows exactly what spots to hit." He pushes his finger in all the way to his knuckles and bites down on Niall's shoulder at the same time.

Niall's moan is worthy of a porno and his back arches so much he wouldn't be surprised if he snapped. Harry smirks, licking around the small bite mark on Niall's pale skin tasting the bubbles and his boy.

"Come for me." Niall blinks out of his daze, lowering his head to look at Harry. He wiggles, feels Harry's fingers drag against his walls.

"Can't. Need more." The look on Harry's face is nothing but smug as he shakes his head.

"Come for me." He pushes in deep again, finger pressing right in Niall's spot and then he bites down again, his free hand digging into Niall's side.

Niall gasps, moans and claws at Harry's back then with a judder and a cry he is spilling into the bath water.

"Fuck. Fuck me. What the hell." Harry laughs sliding his finger from Niall.

"Bet they didn't make you come that quickly with just one finger." Niall scowls, pushing his cheek into Harry's chest.

"I am seriously questioning my manhood right now." Harry tuts, squeezing at Niall bum with both his hands.

"Please, we both know your manhood is just fine. We now also know that I am very good at making you come very fast."

"Made the bath dirty too. Could ya have waited until we were out to make a point." Harry grabs the soap waving it around in Niall's face.

"Nope. Now wash me so we can get out."

"You want me to wash you with water that has my come in it." Harry pushes Niall off him, teeth showing as he smiles.

"Babe I would wash in your come if I could." Niall grimaces taking the soap from Harry.

"That's not normal." Harry shrugs laying back in the water as Niall starts to wash at his chest, fingers tracing over his tattoos.

"What do you think you would have done if Liam did not want us together?" Niall thinks about that for a moment. He would have still gone travelling. Still been heartbroken, but maybe not as heartbroken as he was after Harry left him. Maybe it would not have been a constant struggle for him. Day after day of missing both Harry and Liam and feeling like half of himself was gone. 

"Wold have just gone off on me travels, maybe would have come back home sooner. Or not, might have still been hard to be near you." 

"You think things would have been different with you and Landon? Like maybe you would have had a better relationship, might have actually stayed for him?"

"It was not just him that made me want to stay, it was Daisy and Beth too. I felt like they were my family, and Landon was like having Liam back. It was home without having to come home. It was nice for awhile." Harry watched Niall's hands move over his arms, digging into the ink there. 

"How did it change? If you were such good friends to start with? And the video, the one of him filming you in bed. You looked happy." Niall sighs, cupping water in his hand and tipping it over Harry.

"In that video we had only been sleeping together for a few days, it was just fun nothing really serious. We weren't boyfriends at that point." Niall reaches behind him to pull out the plug, sitting it on the side. "He asked me to be his boyfriend a month later and it felt right at the time so I said yes. I thought that was me sorted, I was going to stay there with my boyfriend and my family. I still loved you so much Harry and I had been pushing and pushing that away. I think me saying yes to being with him was just a way to help with that. I could be his boyfriend, my feelings for him could grow and I could fall in love with him and I not think about you anymore." Harry smooths Niall's hair back from his forehead, gently tugging out the small knots. 

"Not that easy to get over love is it?" Niall lets out a breath, leaning into Harry's touch.

"No. Saying yes to him had the opposite effect. I thought about you more. I felt like I was betraying you. I kept reading your letter and how it said you would be waiting for me and there I was planning on staying in a different country and falling in love with someone else. At first I just told myself that you hadn't, you would have moved on. Louis would have set you up on other dates and you would have eventually found someone you liked. I could not stop thinking about you. He looked at me and I remembered the way you looked at me. He touched me and I felt your touch. He kissed me and I tasted you. If we had just stayed as friends, just fucked about sometimes then it would have never turned so shit." Harry shushes Niall, can see the way he is getting worked up with his fist clenching and his eyes watering.

"Baby, you don't have to keep letting yourself feel so bad about it. It must have sucked for him, that first time he found out that I was still the person you thought about. I get how you would feel guilty for that, but he agreed to keep letting you do it. You act like you took advantage of him, but maybe he saw a way to keep you and he took advantage." Niall shook his head, wiping at his eyes with the back of his hand.

"No. I don't get to be the victim in this. I fucked me and Landon up, I was an arsehole and so selfish. I should have just left before it all got so horrible and come back home and faced it all. Used to hear him cry at night. Like this horrible gut wrenching sob and then after he would come get back into bed and I would still let him fuck me and I would still say your name. It was all just so fucked up."

"OK baby, i'm sorry. I had no idea you were still so upset about this. I knew you felt guilty, that's why your letting him stay right? Doing what you can to make him happy, because of the guilt. But you don't owe him anything." The bath was empty now and Niall was feeling the cold seep back into him. He sniffed then grabbed onto the side of the tub to help him get to his feet and climb out. Harry followed grabbing towels to dry them down a bit before taking Niall's hand and getting him into bed, covering them in the thick blanket. 

"We did not come out today to be upset did we? So tell me something good about your travels." Niall wiggles as close to Harry as he can get, feet shoved between legs and arms draped over his waist, chest pressed to chest and noses touching making Harry go crossed eyed. 

"Like what? You know lots of my stories." Harry hummed running a hand over the swell of Niall's arse as he thought, because he really cannot ever get enough of his arse. 

"Tell me something you done that surprised you? That you did not expect to do." Niall starts laughing straight away, obviously having something spring to his mind the second Harry asks. 

"Oh my god, right you can never, ever tell anyone this. I'm not even sure if it the most surprising or the most shocking. Maybe the most embarrassing. Actually no it was the most disgusting"

"I like the sound of this? Tell me, tell me." Harry is practically vibrating with excitement, like bloody Rae when him and Harry take over her Christmas presents. 

"I'm gonna tell ya jeez, just let me hide me face." Niall turns so his face is mostly hidden in the pillow.

"You wont laugh?" 

"I wont laugh. I am so excited." 

"OK so once upon a time there was a blonde haired Irish boy who was staying in some shitty hostel in Bora Bora." Harry gasps dramatically.

"I like the sound of this. Did this boy find Kim Kardashian's earring?"

"Don't be a twat Harold, that got found. I knew you fell asleep during that episode. Anyway, this blonde haired Irish boy was called.....Steven."

"Nice strong Irish name." Niall elbows him, giggling into the pillow. 

"Steven went out with some new friends and got slightly drunk.."

"How drunk, like i can barely remember what happened drunk or just enough to make you-Steven act a little out of sorts."

"Unfortunately Steven remembers this particular night really well. So anyway after getting a little tipsy Steven stumbled across a group of girls. Nice girls, funny girls. Steven may or may not have fingered and performed the act of oral sex on one of these girls and then woke up the next day and screamed like a banshee." Harry stays quite for all of five seconds before he splutters out a laugh.

"Oh my god! You are like the gayest person I know and you fingered and eat out a girl!! Wait why am I finding that so hot." Niall scoffed, sitting up and grabbing his pillow to hit Harry across the face with it.

"Don't be mean. I was really traumatised the next day. Kept having to wash my mouth and stuff. It was on a vagina Harry." Harry yanked the pillow out of Niall's hands, swinging his legs over his wait to straddle him.

"Hell yeah it was. She taste good?" Harry waggles his eyebrows, cock starting to fill up. Niall looks down at it looking rather unimpressed.

"Really?" Harry nods, biting down on his lips.

"Yeah really. thinking of you with your head between some girls legs is doing things to me." Niall snorts.

"You really are weird today."

"Don't care. Show me. Show me how you done it." Harry rolls onto his back, yanking Niall over him.

"Harry, no."

"Yeah. Fuck so turned on. Show me, lick me out." Niall steady's himself over Harry trying to work out of he is messing with him or not. The hard cock brushing his stomach would make him think not. 

"Want me to lick your pussy?" He is testing him, fully expecting him to burst out laughing and wack Niall over the head before taking the piss out of him. Instead Harry lets out a filthy moan, legs parting and eyes turning almost completely black. 

"Yes. Niall, yes please." He licks his lips pushing down on Niall's shoulder. "Lick my pussy." Niall huffs out a breath, his own dick starting to perk up. This was certainly new. 

"Well, you did ask like a good girl." The sound Harry makes at that is beyond beautiful and Niall is a little lost and they definitely need to talk about when the hell Harry liked to be called a girl. Right now he is far to busy licking into his boy to really care to much about it. 

Afterwards when Niall had made Harry come three times with just his mouth Niall flops on the bed next to him and makes himself come while Harry watches looking like he is lost in some different time zone.

"What the hell was that?" Harry makes a garbled noise, raising his head before dropping it back down.

"Amazing, that was amazing. Me sleepy." Niall looks down at his messy hand and stomach, nose scrunched up.

"I'm gonna get cleaned up. Want me to order some food, get that energy back up." Harry holds his thumb up in the air, not even moving to watch Niall walk into the bathroom. 

The only reason he moves before food arrives is because Niall phone keeps beeping and it's starting to annoy him. 

"Niall phone." Niall doesn't answer and Harry thinks he can hear the shower going so obviously Niall had decided to wash off without him, which is just rude. Not that he thinks he is anywhere near capable of standing upright at this moment. 

He does however manage to drag himself to the edge of the bed were Niall's phone is laying on the floor. He grabs it and unlocks it using Niall code, which is his own birthday and he is stupid for thinking that is good security. 

There are a few texts from the group chat that Harry ignores because he can just look at them later on his own phone. It's the ones from Landon that get is attention. He clicks on them only because he knows Niall has no problem with Harry looking at his phone. 

Lan: Date day, like the whole day?

Lan: Was hoping to do some fun stuff with you today.

Lan: What time do you think you will be back?

Lan: Gonna go to shops later, shall i cook dinner for us all?

Lan: Does Harry like Fish?

Lan:I will get fish.

Lan: were are you?

Lan: Could you ring me back please?

Lan: Ni?

Harry rolls his eyes when he notices that there is also a load of missed calls from him. He really had to find a way of getting rid of this psycho without upsetting Niall. 

He turns Niall's phone off to stop any chances of Landon ruining their day together like he was so clearly trying to do, then lays it back on the floor hoping Niall will think he turned it off by accident. 

When Niall comes back out he is all fresh and red from the water and Harry eagerly grabs at him to tuck him back into the bed.

"I want bananas and toast and cake"

"Alright ya great child. Let go off me so I can get the phone, honestly you're so annoying." Harry just grins and pokes at him while he orders the food. They kiss until the food arrives, Niall wrapping a sheet around his waist to answer the door, both not bothered by the looks they are receiving at all. 

They talk about everything and nothing. Stupid stuff that makes them laugh as they shove food into each other mouths and kiss and make a mess on the bed that they don't have to care about because they wont be sleeping in it. 

But then it gets dark and they order more food and have more sex and laugh and talk until the are a sticky heap fast asleep in each others arms. 

xxxx

Niall wakes up to Harry obnoxious ring tone blaring in his ear. He groans rolling onto his back, Harry's arm unsticking from his skin. 

"What's happening." Niall just grunts in reply slapping around randomly with his hand until he finds the torture device. He stabs at the screen until he manages to answer it.

"Whaa." His tongue is sticking to the roof of his mouth and he feels like he as been sucking on cotton balls all night. The rest of his body is either sticking to the sheets or Harry and he just feels gross.

"Where the hell are you?" Niall frowns, rubbing at his face. He forces his eyes open looking around the room.

"Urgh, hotel." Its Zayn, he has work out that much. Harry makes another noise next to him. 

"What the hell are you- never mind. Your phone is off dickhead."

"Oh, battery." Is all he gets out. It must have died.

"Ni, you and Harry have to get home now. Something's happened."


	15. Chapter 15

Niall stands staring at the wall in front of him. Harry is behind him, chest pressed to his back and arms wrapped around his waist. Zayn is to his left and Niall can feel his eyes focused on him, waiting for him to react.

Outside he can hear Rae running around with Matt. A scream and a laugh, happy that her daddy's seem to have forgotten about taking her to school. He can hear Landon too, in the kitchen with the kettle boiling.

Niall steps forward, Harry's arm falling from his waist.

His face is staring back at him everywhere he looks. Every way he turns he is met with his own eyes looking back. His own smile.

Every area of the wall in the lounge has been plastered with pictures of him.

He slowly moves around looking at them all, Harry starting to do the same across the other side of the room.

Some are old. Pictures he knows should have Harry, Liam or Zayn in them.

He thinks of someone taking the time to cut him out of all these pictures so it's just Niall. All alone.

Niall walking around town. Doing boring mundane jobs.

Niall in his house, zoomed in so he is slightly blurry.

There are loads of him at the London eye. He gets a chill, steps back and looks away. They were in the capsule with him. Pictures taking close up by someone standing right behind him. He can't even remember who else was there apart from his own friends. He didn't even think to pay attention to anyone else.

"Ni." Niall goes over to Harry who turns to him, eyes wide, face drained of colour. Niall looks at the picture he is pointing at of Niall asleep in bed, one of Harry's tattoos still left in the picture from were his arm had been resting over him.

"I don't-how." Landon comes in with a tray filled with steaming mugs in his hand.

He had looked shaken up when Niall and Harry had arrived. Still did as he places the tray down.

"Tell us what happened?" Harry asks hands on his hips as he faces Landon.

"I umm, I went to the supermarket at about three I think. I don't think I was gone more then an hour. When I came back it was all here." Niall glances over at the shopping bags still laying by the stairs. He can't imagine how scary it must have been for Landon to come back and find all this.

"I tried to call but your phone was off. I don't have anyone else number or knew where anyone lived. So I just had to wait."

"Me and Matt got here about eight this morning." Zayn carried on for Landon. "Rae wanted to see you before school like most mornings. We came in to all this. Landon was just sat there, he was really shook up."

Niall feels sick, his throat slick with bile and his stomach turning.

He was being watched 24/7. His every move watched. They were in his house while he was asleep.

"There was no sign of forced entry. The door was locked when I got back because I had to unlock it, I definitely remember unlocking it, and locking it before I left too."

"You have a key?" The tone to Harry's voice makes Niall turn.

"I got him a copy made. It was easier that way." Zayn looks between them all, worry etched into his features.

"So what, someone was watching the house? Saw Landon leave then somehow got in and put all this up, in just an hour? Or were they already in the house?" The thought sends a wave of coldness over Niall and he slumps back into the wall, photographs rustling under his back.

"You OK Niall?" Is he OK?

No. No definitely not. Who was doing this? Was he safe? Why were they this obsessed with him? Of watching him and taking photos of him. How were they getting into his home without any sign that they had been here.

Harry appears in front of him, stroking his hand over Niall's cheek and crouching down so his face is level.

"Baby. Come sit down." Harry moves him over to the sofa sitting down with Niall over his lap.

"Should we call the police?" Zayn asks walking back over to the wall, standing by the TV. Niall wonders if he recognises some of the photos too, that he had been cut from.

"Don't that sometimes make it worse?" Landon still looks pale, hands curled together in front of him. "Like, what if we piss this person off and they just come for Niall?"

"It's not a movie." Zayn scoffs, hands on his hips. "we can't let someone do shit like this. It's messed up. What do you think Harry." Harry is quite for a while so Niall lifts his head up to look at him. He is watching Landon, his stare hard.

"I don't think we need to call the police either." Zayn laughs in disbelief, hands raising up before smacking back down to his side.

"So we are just gonna let someone get away with this? Scare our boy?"

"My boy." Niall closes his eyes, hiding his face in Harry's arms. He doesn't want them all fighting over this. "He is my boy and I know what's best for him." The silence that follows is awkward. Niall can hear Zayn shifting around and Harry holds him tighter.

"I know and I understand that but this is what... the third? Fourth time something has happened?"

"Wait, this is not the first time?" Niall sits up so he can see Landon who is still looking pale as he looks between them all.

"No. Not the first time I have been watched like this and its not the first time someone has come into the house." Harry sighs, pressing his lips to Niall's temple and keeping them their. 

"When did it start?"Harry removes his lips, slumping back into the sofa his arms still cradling Niall to him.

"Louis wedding. It all started at Louis wedding." Niall looks down at Harry relief washing over him. This must mean Harry finally believes him. That someone was there at the wedding, watching him and in their room too. It makes him feel so much safer knowing Harry is now in this with him. 

"Someone has been breaking into my house too." Zayn stands with his back to everyone, hands on his hip as he looks at the wall. Harry's head whips over to look at him, a deep crease between his eyes.

"Since when? You never said." Zayn dropped his head into his hands, fingers rubbing at his forehead like he was trying to ease his head.

"A few days. Whoever it is has been planting drugs on me and in my house." 

"Mate, that is really fucked up. Who would even want to do that to you? The damage that could do to your life." Landon steps forward, bottom lip between his fingers. He stands next to Zayn, eyes narrowed as he looks at the pictures.

"What if its the same person? What if they don't want to just mess with Niall but want to mess with all of you?" The thought of someone doing this to not just him but all the people he cared about sent a jolt of fear over Niall, the sick feeling curling up in his stomach again. 

"I don't think anyone else has had anything happen? Liam would have said something, Louis is fine and so are the girls. I mean planting the drugs could be a way to fuck with both Matt and Zayn at the same time and doing stuff like this to Ni is going to have an effect on me. But why just us four?" Zayn shook his head spinning on his heel to face Harry and Niall.

"No, it don't make sense. It's not like we have pissed anyone off, we keep to ourselves. Niall I understand, he is in the limelight and people know him and what he does and he has fans. Fans get intense right? Especially over characters in books. Not sure I have heard much about authors getting stalked though, that's like Kardashian shit. Why would they get obsessed with Niall and us? His characters yes, the people in his life no." 

"The characters are based of people in his life though." Landon says looking over his shoulder at Niall. "They have seen everyone on your live chats right? Your social media has all your friends on it." 

"Yes but if they like the characters to such an extreme that they would think we are actually them then why would they do stuff like this?"

"Has this person given you the impression that they want to hurt you?"

"No, its more like they just want to watch me, see me all the time."

"Right, so they are crazy about you. In the book Zayn's character is the bad guy, the one that comes in and ruins it all-" Zayn flinches at that. "- and it seems like he is the one this person wants to hurt. Like revenge, they think they are doing something good for you."

"It's all a bit extreme." Harry says. Niall gets up of his lap, pressure building up behind his eyes that is going to turn into a nasty headache. Landon laughs motioning around them.

"This is extreme. This person obviously likes to go big with their statements." What Landon was saying was so far fetched and like something out of the pages of one of Niall's many thriller books upstairs in his bedroom. Somehow it made a little sense. Niall took another look around at the wall, his head now pounding. Zayn catches his eye and seems to notice. 

"Maybe we should take it all down, if we agree we are not calling the police then it does not need to be up. Niall does not need to keep seeing all this." They all agree, Harry getting back up from the sofa to start taking down photos. Sellotape tearing and pulling paint off the wall. Niall flinches each time he sees a flake fall. He can almost hear the sound of it. Someone walking around this room pulling and biting into the tape before sticking up another picture. Another moment meant just for Niall.

"Hang on, there is something here." The all turn towards Harry who had started pulling photos down faster not caring at all for the extra damage he is causing.

They all gather together to look at what is revealed. Behind them there is the bang of the back door opening. Rae running in and Matt following.

"Oh god." Niall swallows then closes his eyes. Harry moves forward again tearing the rest down, Zayn and Landon joining in as Matt comes up to Niall to place an arm around him.

The photos pile up on the floor, Rae stepping over them and picking some up to look at before losing interest quickly and dropping them. Blissfully unaware of the tension in the room.

"You still sure about the police?" Niall opens his eyes again. Written repeatedly across the walls is the word 'mine' in black.

"Jesus." Niall puts his hand over his mouth, convinced that he is going to be sick. Harry is over by his side in seconds, stroking back his hair and holding him to his chest. 

"I'm calling the police." Matt starts to get his phone out of his pocket. Niall shakes his head, hands fisting into Harry shirt. He wants to go back to last night. Just him and Harry locked away from the world talking, laughing and making love. 

"No. No, I don't want you to call them. Just get rid of it. I don't want to see it anymore I want it gone." Harry shushes him gently leading him out of the room and into a seat at the table in the kitchen, kneeling down by his feet so he can keep holding him. 

"It's alright baby, it will be gone soon."

"I'm gonna go get some paint from mine." Zayn says popping his head around the corner. 

"Yeah, thanks." Zayn nods once then leaves, taking Matt and Rae with him. Landon comes trough to the kitchen and grabs the kettle, eyes firmly on Harry and Niall as he moves around the room. 

"They have been everywhere Harry. Everywhere we have been they have been watching." Landon pulls three mugs out of the cupboard.

"Is there anyone you can remember seeing a lot Ni? A face you recognized?" Niall shakes his head against Harry shoulder.

"No, nobody. It's like being followed by a fucking ghost. They are even getting in and out of the house like they have been walking through the bloody walls. It's like they can get anywhere, like nowhere is safe." 

xxxx

Niall is sat slumped over the table, finger lazily running over the rim of his mug, tea long gone cold. Zayn sits opposite him, unlit cigarette between his lip. The smell of paint is so overwhelming that it is making Niall's headache grow to an almost head splitting pain and the nausea in his stomach even stronger. 

There is music playing softly in the lounge, Louis voice raising above the noise every now and then as he says something to Harry, or a sarcastic remark to Landon. Niall has no idea how Landon has managed to stay painting in the room for so long with Louis doing everything he can to piss him off. 

"Matt letting you around the kids then?" Zayn takes the cigarette out of his mouth and places it behind his ear instead. Niall is suddenly taking back to sixteen year old Zayn, angry at the world because his parents hated him and always with a fag tucked behind his ear. 

"Yeah, only supervised though. Think he believes when when I say I have not taken anything because it would be obvious. It's not like I pop a pill, or shot up and then just go about my day. I get fucked up to the point of almost killing myself. But I think he still thinks I have been buying them and that it is only a matter of time before I give in." Zayn shakes his head, taking the cigarette back from his ear and twirling it in his fingers. "His parents looked at me like I was shit when they brought the kids back. Thought those days were behind me ya know, parents looking at me like that. They love me but they really fucking hate that part of me. It's like they think I am this constant danger to the kids and Matt." 

"I'm sorry." Zayn chuckled, reaching across the table for Niall's hand.

"Why you sorry for? You been planting them on me?" Zayn narrowed his eyes playfully, tugging Niall's hand closer to him. 

"Just sorry anyone could possible have a bad thought about you. You are the best dad, husband and friend. I want everyone to see you that way." Zayn shrugged, raising Niall's hand up to place a kiss on his knuckles. 

"Maybe it's enough just you knowing that. Fuck everyone else, they don't matter to me." Niall wonders if Zayn actually felt like that. If he really was this tough bloke that gave no shits about what people thought, maybe even preferred others to think badly off him so they left him alone. Or if deep down it was just his way of not getting hurt. Keep everyone away so he never finds out what they truly think. 

"I love you, you're like the bestest best person in the world." Zayn held his hand tighter, blinking down at the table.

"Yeah, love you too Irish." 

"Hey, any reason why the artist is not in there doing his thing?" Louis walked into the kitchen, green paint splattered over his clothes. Niall was not sure about having a green lounge. The room had been the same color since Niall was a teenager and he loved keeping it the same. The only paint Zayn had the right amount of was green so he had to suck it up. 

"Now going, jeez." Louis grabbed a glass out the cupboard, flicking Zayn off before filling it up with water.

"How you doing buttercup?" Niall scoffed at the nickname, nose scrunching up.

"Good thanks, Treacle Pie." Louis beamed holding a hand up to his chest.

"Oh gosh, i don't think a pet name has suited me as much as that. I am literally a treacle pie."

"What, sickly?" Louis pouted,placing his glass back down.

"I was going for sweet and tasty. You are mean and have hurt my feelings." Niall laughed as Louis flounced out the room dramatically leaving Niall alone with his cold mug of tea. 

Harry looks over his shoulder giving Louis a weird look as he comes back in.

Louis waves it off, crouching down next to Harry who was carefully paintings above the skirting boards, he looks over his shoulder at Landon who was talking to Zayn before turning back to Harry.

"You think this was him?" He keeps his voice low, eyes on Harry's brush as he moves it back and forward.

"Not sure. Some of the photos were from when we all went on the eye so Landon was with us and he would have been in the photos. There is no way he could have taken them. It's got to be someone else." Louis bites down on his lip, looking back over to Landon, face turning into a scowl when he finds him looking right back.

"He is creepy, him being here is creepy. Probably got someone working with him"

"Zayn said the same thing. Doesn't mean he is doing all this. It would explain why this person got in and out so easily. But he can't have taken all these photos and he can't have broken into Zayn's house, or planted drugs on him when we were out. One of us would have seen." Louis picks up his own brush, dipping it into the paint pot near Harry's knee.

"Who's first said about not calling the police?" Harry paused, looking up at Louis for a second. He cleared his throat using the back of his wrist to wipe at his nose.

"Landon." Louis titled his head to the side, giving Harry a look.

"Exactly. We need to keep a closer eye. Spend more time with him and try to work out what his deal is."

"And then what? Niall would just be blind to anything bad he has done." Louis shrugs, slapping his brush against the wall sending paint hitting Harry's face.

"He don't need to believe it himself. We get the proof that's all that matters. Far as I am concerned it gives us a good enough reason to fuck him up. He won't be so keen to stick around then." Their eyes meet and they share a quick smile before focusing on painting the walls.

"Hey Lou, can you just head out to my car and get the rollers please?" Louis gets up catching Zayn's keys that are thrown at him before heading out to the car.

"I'm going for a smoke." Niall's voice comes from the kitchen seconds before the back door closes.

Harry goes back to painting his area, Zayn and Landon finishing off and getting the trays ready for Louis to come back.

Harry is just thinking about sneaking off to sit with Niall outside when Landon breaks the comfortable silence.

"I find this friendship between you too a little surprising." Harry pauses his painting, looking over to Landon. His back is to Harry and Zayn is facing him too, a confused look on his face.

"What mine and Harry's?" Landon sits back on his feet, elbows resting on his knees.

"Yeah. Thought you would hate each other. Or at least you Harry would hate Zayn" Harry drops his brush down, raising to stand straight.

"Look Landon I don't know what you are about to try and start but me and Zayn are absolu-"

"It's just that I find it funny how you're so cool with him. He is the reason you and Niall split up is he not? The one that got Niall to take drugs, the one the tricked Niall into cheating. He would never have cheated if not right?" Harry fish mouthed, completely shocked by what Landon was saying. It was random and it made no sense. Why would he want to cause trouble between him and Zayn.

"Do you feel bad Zayn? Knowing you done that to Niall? Four years of missing something, of not being able to move on? When he could have just stayed happy in the first place." Zayn backs away, looking nervously at Harry, his hands curling together in front of his chest.

"I mean yeah but Harry....they both forgave me. It wasn't like that...Niall doesn't-"

"It's OK Z." Harry steps forward so he can stand next to Zayn glaring at Landon.

"What are you trying to do? Why would you want him to feel bad for all the stuff that is in the past? I really don't think you care much that me and Niall split up because of it all." Landon keeps his face blank, paintbrush hanging loosely in his hands.  
"How does this benefit you? You want to come between me and Niall, you want him back right? How does bringing this up between me and Zayn help you with that at all?" Landon suddenly smiles, shrugging his shoulders once.

"It doesn't. I'm just curious how you managed to be such good friends. I didn't mean to offend."

Louis comes back into the house, straight away sensing the tension in the house. He stands in front of Harry and Zayn rollers clutched in his hand.

"What's going on?" Landon takes a roller from Louis smiling sweetly as he goes over to a tub of paint.

"Nothing, just chatting."

"Chatting about what?" Harry puts a hand on Louis shoulder to give it a squeeze, a silent way if telling him to leave it.   
"Did you do this?" Harry sighs, Zayn's eye widening.   
"Do what Louis?" Landon questions, smile still firmly in place.   
"All this shit with the photos and the creepy writing. Was it you?" Landon laughs looking over at them all.   
"What exactly would I gain from doing this? Other then scare Niall, which I very much don't want to do." Louis clicks his tongue, shaking his head as he dumps the rest of the rollers onto the sofa, Zayn straight away picking one up for himself.

"Not sure what you think you are gaining from turning up here in the first place." Landon bends down, grabbing the paint pot starting to pour some out.

"Well guess we will have to wait and find out about that won't we." He turns his head, eyes meeting Louis. "I'm sure it won't be long before I get exactly what I want." Louis moves to lunge forward but Harry grabs his arm and yanks him back. The last thing they need is for Niall to come back in and see them all fighting with Landon, who will just play himself off as the victim in it all.

"Leave it Lou, it's not worth it. You OK Zayn?" Zayn nods chewing on his bottom lip as he watched Landon.

"Hey." He moves to get his attention better, hand tugging on his arm. "We good yeah." Zayn let out a breath forcing a small smile onto his face.   
"Yeah, course. Let just get this done for Niall." Zayn makes himself busy and neither him or Landon speak much over the next couple of hours. Harry can practically feel the anger coming off Louis as they finish up the room. Niall comes in when it's done, pouting about the colour but looking more then relived that everything is covered and gone.

Louis and Zayn help tidy and pack up before grabbing their coats, ready to head home.

"Talk to Niall, he needs to know what Landon was saying." Harry agree with Zayn, ruffling his hair before closing the door behind them.

Landon is upstairs taking a shower so Harry uses the chance to go talk to Niall straight away. 

"How you feeling baby?" Niall is stood washing up in the kitchen to keep himself busy and attempt to distract his mind. 

"A little better. Thank you for sorting the room out." Harry wraps his arms around Niall's waist, chin resting on Niall's shoulders watching as he rinsed out a mug. 

"S'ok, you sure you don't want to tell the police about it all?" Niall shakes his head, hands going still in the bubbly water.

"No. I don't think it's the best thing to do." Harry runs his nose over the sleeve off Niall's top, breaths him in before stepping back. 

"Is that what you really think, or are you just saying that because Landon thinks it and you still want to please him?" Niall turns around, bubbles falling to the floor around him as he wipes his hands on his jeans.

"What's that suppose to me? I have my own mind Harry, I'm not making decisions based on pleasing people." 

"I know, but I think you would maybe feel a little differently if he was not there in your ear all the time."

"He is not in my ear." Niall looks fed up as he crosses the room, grabbing his phone from the table and shoving it into his pocket. Harry grabs his arm, standing in front of him to stop him from leaving the room. 

"I think you should maybe ask him to go stay in a hotel." 

"You don't trust me?"

"When did i say that?" Niall ripped his arm out of Harry's hold, looking away.

"That's why you don't want him here, because you think i'm going to fuck him right? That i feel so bad that i would actually let him do that." Harry is so startled that Niall think's that is the problem that for a second all he can do is blink at Niall, mouth open. 

"I can't believe you think I could do that." Niall storms past Harry and it kicks Harry back into action. He cannot let Niall think that. 

"Wait, no Niall." Harry gently stops him and turns Niall back to face him. "Baby I would never think that about you. I trust you completely. I just don't think Landon's intentions are good and I think it's putting a strain on us having him stay here. There is nothing wrong with asking him to stay elsewhere. He turned up unannounced and we have let him stay for long enough. He is clearly still in love with you and i fully believe he is here to get you back. You can think different if you want but that is what I think. Him being here is making me uncomfortable and it's not good for our relationship." 

"He has done nothing to make you think he is still in love with me, you're being paranoid." Harry laughed, dropping his hand from Niall.

"Are you kidding me? He has been all over you, he takes any opportunity to rub it in my face that you and him were together, I am pretty damn sure he posted that Youtube video to mess with you, I would not be surprised if he has done more weird shit then that to bring you and him closer. You are so blind to what a creep he is." Niall steps back,hands rubbing at his face. He looks so done that Harry almost feels bad for bringing this all up now after Niall has had such a bad day. 

"I can't talk about this right now. I am tired and I am freaked out about this freak that is following me around. All I have wanted all day is to just get into bed and have a cuddle with you and instead you attack me with all this shit. Just stop being such a jealous child." Harry let's Niall go this time, groaning in frustration as he sits at the table. 

He has no idea what the right thing to do is.

If he confronts Landon, or goes to the police himself he is going to push Niall further away from him. 

If he does nothing then Landon is going to wiggle his way deeper under Niall's skin and he is going to take him. 

Harry was willing to fight, he just had to find the right way to do it. 

There has to be a way to make Landon slip up. Make Niall find out for himself what he is doing by coming here. 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Niall startles away at 3am sweating and in a panic. He turns the lamp on, eyes darting around the room, chest heaving as he tried to calm his breathing. He is suddenly taking back to all the nights he woke up feeling like this after dreaming about his mum and it sends a wave of grief over him that he has not felt in such a long time. 

Harry is fast asleep next to him. Pillow creases on his cheek and soft plump lips parted as he lets out soft snores. 

He hates that they argued again. 

Was it possible that his guilt over Landon was making him do and say things he would normally not? Niall liked to think he was the type of person who would always do what they felt best no matter who they were trying to please. 

Not that he was trying to please Landon. 

He throws the covers off and gets out of bed leaving the room to go downstairs and get a glass off water. 

He only switches the cupboard lights on, eyes still sore and heavy with sleep. He sips lazily, not caring about the few dribbles that go down his chin. It felt like far to much effort to reach up and wipe them away. He really must remember to take a glass up when he goes to bed to save the painfully sleepy walk downstairs. 

Maybe he should do something nice for Harry tomorrow. 

He wonders if River or possible Cassie would take Landon out somewhere in the afternoon so he and Harry could have some alone time for a bit. Or they could go out. 

Going out meant someone watching him. 

They should stay in and have a nice meal and watch a film. With the curtains closed. 

Niall narrowed his eyes, glass placed back on the side as he looked out the kitchen window. 

He had never had to think much about who was watching him when he was at home before. After all why would anyone be looking into his home. Of course they closed the curtains when it got dark like everyone. But it had always been to feel more cosy, never because he worried about people looking in and seeing what he was doing. They never brought a blind for the kitchen because all that was out there was the back garden.

Niall stepped closer to the window, nose almost pressed to the glass. The light from the cupboard made it hard to see out and at first all he could see was his reflection looking back at him. 

But he thought....

He was sure.....

He went up on his tip toes, stomach pressing into the sink as he stared out. 

A hand pressed to the glass right over Niall face. It ran down the glass, making a loud screeching noise before it was lifted away. Niall stumbled back until his back his the fridge and he did not realise he was screaming until both Landon and Harry were running into the kitchen. 

"Niall! What happened?" Niall grabs onto Harry, sobbing loudly.

"Someone was outside, they were at the window." Harry runs to the backdoor, unlocking it and pulling it open. Niall panics. He is sure someone is going to come in and get him, or grab Harry and hurt him. 

"Harry don't." Harry is already outside. The garden light should come on. It's a motion light and it should have come on when someone was standing right outside the house. Niall was sure he had not turned it off, and Harry wouldn't either. 

"Hey, it's OK." Landon gathers Niall up, hand rubbing up and down his back. Harry comes back in, hair a mess on his head and eyes wild.

"They left. The gate was open." Niall hid his face in Landon's neck, shoulder shaking as he cried. He was so done with all this crap. 

"They have gone. It's OK sweetie, let's go watch some TV yeah?"

"We should call the police this time." Harry double checks the door is locked, then check the window a shiver going down his back when he see's a smudged hand print. 

"I think Niall just wants to be distracted. Want to watch a film love?" Niall sniffles then nods, arms wrapping around Landon's waist as he leads him out the room. 

Harry watches them go. Landon looks up eyes meeting Harry. He smirks before pressing his lips the side of Niall's head.

"I got you." Harry grits his teeth, turning to grip onto the counter. He looks over to the switch that turns the outside light on and off seeing it in the off position. 

He shakes his head, tries to calm himself down enough to go sit with Niall. 

He had to find a way to get rid of Landon. He is starting to dread finding out how far Landon will go to get Niall back.


	16. chapter 16

Niall wakes up only two hours after he had managed to fall back to sleep again. His eyes are heavy and his body feel even heavier. Harry is spread out on his back, arms thrown out to the side and head turned towards Niall. There was a layer of sweat on his stomach where Niall's body had previously been clutching on to him like a vice before sleep took him.

Niall runs the tips of his finger through the wetness, his heart doing a little flutter when Harry's nose scrunches up and he wiggles in his sleep.

He strokes his fingers down Harry's stomach, playing around with the waistband of his boxers watching as his stomach constricted under his touch.

Harry let out a breathy sigh, lips smacking and head turning as his eyes slowly fluttered open. He looks at Niall, eyes blinking rapidly before a smile stretches across his face.

"Hi." Harry's morning voice was without a doubt one of Niall's favourite sounds. Deeper then normal, rough and croaky and always sends a hot jolt right to Niall's dick.

"Hi. Morning." With a groan deep in his throat Harry wraps his arms around Niall's waist and tugs him closer.

"Love waking up to you." Niall feels his cheeks heat up and loves that something so simple can still turn him into a blushing teen.

"Love waking up to you too." Niall moves his head back so he can kiss Harry's lips, tongue darting out to wet them slightly before pushing past into the warmth of Harry's mouth.

"Hmm, even with my morning breath." Niall giggles, toes curling as Harry hooks his legs over his waist.  
"Even with morning breath." Harry's hand tangles in Niall's hair, pulling him in harder and deeper tongue curling with Niall's before running over the back of his teeth groaning.

"Love your taste." Niall pulls away, lips making a wet smack at they part, moving down to kiss Harry's neck then shoulders before moving to take one of his nipple's into his mouth, teeth grazing slightly. Harry gasps, the heel of his feet digging into the bed as Niall licks and sucks and nibbles his way down his chest and stomach.

"I'm sorry about yesterday." He mumbles into Harry's skin, lowering Harry's boxers slightly. Harry swallows, looking down at Niall between his legs.   
"Huh?" Niall glances up, eyes dark and cheeks red.  
"Arguing with you. Sorry." Harry strokes his fingers through Niall's hair, smiling to himself when he see's the ring on his finger.   
"I'm sorry too." Harry lifts his hips up as Niall shimmy's his boxers the rest of the way down, past the swell of his bum and over the tip of his hard dick before sliding them down his leg and throwing them to the floor.

Niall takes a moment to look at him. Head pressed back into the pillow, lips parted as he breaths out little gasps. Hair a mess of curls, eye squeezed shut, throat strained and bobbing with each swallow. Dick already rock hard and leaking onto his stomach, his skin glistening. He was so beautiful and he was all Niall's.

Niall leaned down, breathing over the head of his cock before grabbing the base and licking a strip over the thick vein. Harry moans, legs raising and hips rocking slightly as Niall wraps his lips around the tip, licking into the wet slit before slowly sliding down taking him all the way in.

"Niall" Niall loves the feeling of Harry in his mouth. Feeling the weight of his cock on his tongue, the sweet and bitter taste of him on the back of his throat. He loves feeling him get impossibly harder, twitching in his mouth.

He loves how quickly Harry loses control as he sucks and licks and kisses every part of his cock he can get him mouth on. He pulls off, moving down to take Harry's balls into his mouth, his hand slowly working up and down Harry length thumb dragging along the slit before moving back down dragging his foreskin back before going up again.

Harry is growing louder. A mixture of nonsense and Niall's name and curses.

Niall moves back to his cock, spitting before taking it back into his mouth going down and down until his nose is pressing into Harry's tummy.

"Fuck baby. So good." Harry presses his thumb to the corner of Niall's lips, feeling how full his mouth is.   
"Your mouth was made for my cock." Niall moans around Harry, breathing heavily out of his nose.

Harry sits up slightly, hands resting either side of Niall's head. Niall pulls off, his hand resting over one of Harry's.

"You. You." Harry nods, easing Niall back onto his cock before gripping his hair and moving Niall's head up and down. He starts of slow, enjoying watching Niall's lips work over him, the sight of his dick going in and out of his mouth. He can feel himself getting closer so he starts to move faster, Niall closing his eyes and grabbing onto Harry's waist. Harry falls back into the bed, hands still holding onto Niall as he fucks his hips up not caring about the amount of noise he is making as Niall gags and splutters, spit dribbling from the corners of his lips.

"Gonna come baby. Fuck yeah baby going to fucking come." His whole body shakes, his hips slamming up once more as he starts spilling into Niall mouth.   
His hands drop from Niall's head but he keeps slowly bobbing up and down working Harry through his high, a soft keening noise still coming from him.

He lets him slip out of his mouth when he starts to soften up, crawling back up Harry's body to kiss him.

"I really, really love waking up to you." Niall laugh is cut off by a choked moan as Harry wraps his hand around his cock tugging it quickly.

Niall drops his head forward mouth parted against Harry's shoulder as he groans and spills over Harry's fist.

He falls back to the bed body completely relaxed and satisfied

"Could stay in bed with you all day." Harry hums in agreement, wiping his hand clean on a pair of boxers from the floor

"Want some food?" Harry rubs at his stomach looking over at the clock on the side.

"Yeah, got to be at work soon yuck." His tongue lolls out then he rolls onto his side trying to lick at Niall's face. Niall laughs loudly pushing him away and getting up off the bed.

"You are a freak." Niall yanks on a pair of joggers then grabs one of Harry's jumpers off the floor. Its too big for him and smell like Harry still. He leans over the bed to give Harry another kiss, nipping his nipples before running out the room to avoid being hit by the pillow Harry threw at him.

When he gets to the kitchen Landon is coming in from outside a cloth and a bottle of window cleaner in his hand. He stops when he sees Niall, holding them up with a small smile.

"Hey, I was just cleaning the um glass." Niall looks over to the window above the sink were Landon as gone out and cleaned off the smudged hand print.

"Thanks." A lump starts forming in his throat at the memory of last night. The hand pressing against the glass inches from his face. He shakes his head, a shiver going over him leaving a trail of goosebumps as he yanks the fridge open and grabs some milk and Harry's overnight oats.

He shoves the oats into the microwave before putting the kettle on, still warm from Landon making himself a drink.

"Louis came over but you sounded busy" Niall blushed turning to give Landon an apologetic look. "He was dropping that off." Landon points and Niall notices the large scrapbook on the table for the first time.   
"Oh it's Cassie's wedding book." He picks it up carefully opening to the first page where Cassie had stuck a list on contacts for some small local businesses.

Niall gets a rush of excitement thinking about sitting down with Harry and planning their wedding.

Harry comes sloping into the kitchen as Niall is placing the scrapbook safely on top of the fridge away from any possible spills.

"Got the wedding stuff from Cassie and Lou. Maybe we should have a good look tomorrow yeah?" Niall says as he removes Harry's oats from the microwave and finishes the tea.

"Definitely. Thanks." Harry takes his breakfast from Niall curling his free hand around his waist to pull him into a kiss.   
"S'cuse me." Landon wiggles between them. "Need the sink." Harry raises his eyebrow but decides to ignore the interruption and busy himself with getting a spoon from the draw before sitting down.

"What time is Sonya getting here today?" With all the stuff going on yesterday Niall had completely forgotten that tonight was his release party.

"Oh crap, at like two I think? Landon did some suits arrive for us yesterday?"

"Yeah actually, shit sorry I forgot after- well you know. I put them in my bedroom because I didn't want to just let myself in to your room."

"Thank you. You're coming tonight right? I got you on the guest list. It mostly boring speeches and talking to people but we have some fun towards the end." Landon shrugs scratching at his stomach.

"Sound good. I don't have anything fancy to wear though."

"You can have one of my other suits, should fit you fine." Landon just nods at that and carries on rinsing off his dishes before placing them into the dishwasher.

"Harry want time you finishing work today."

"Lunchtime, so I will be here for Sonya if you need to be out."

"I just wanted to go see River, make sure she is sorted for tonight and doesn't need help with anything. Is that on with you Lan? You can come of course."

"If it means getting to play with a cute baby then I am in. Just going to take a shower." Niall sits across from Harry with his drink, putting his feet up between Harry's thighs. 

"Do you think you will still be able to leave work early after having a couple of days off?"

"Yeah, I only have the kids this morning anyway as they are going off on a school trip. Should be home just before lunch if you're not back from Rivers." Niall sips his tea smiling to himself when Harry's tongue pokes out to scoop some of his food off the spoon.

"You are so cute." Harry grins before flicking some oats towards Niall. 

xxxx

"Your not paying me that much rent." River frowns down at her notebook where she had all her bills written down.

"Ni, i looked at the other flats on the internet and that's how much they are being rented out for."

"Yeah because the landlords are money grabbing dicks. I don't even have mortgage payments on this place so no way are you paying me that. Is your housing Benefit sorted?" River slides across a letter in a brown envelope. Niall pulls it out eyes skimming over all the information. 

"Babe you are trying to give me like double what they are paying you, the money needs to go on you and Nolan. Just give me that amount." Niall points at the figure on the letter. River sighs looking over towards Nolan who was laid out of he the floor Landon leaning over him waving a toy about and making noises.

"I feel bad." 

"Why? I offered you to stay here because I want things to be as easy as possible. This place was empty before and I don't need the money. Just give me your benefit payment and that is plenty." River takes the letter back and closes her notebook letting Niall know she has given in.

"Fine but you don't go spending that money on me and Nolan." She steps around the chair throwing her arms around Niall's neck. "Thank you. For helping me so much." 

"It's what family do love. Now lets have a look at this water bill because I'm thinking about keeping it in my name just for now." Macy snatched the bill away before Niall can get it glaring at him.

"Or you know you can pay your own bill, its whatever. You are the boss." 

Once they have both gathered up all the papers they had been going through together Niall follows River into her bedroom leaving Landon to amuse Nolan for a bit. 

Niall chucks himself down on the double bed, groaning as he sinks into the mattress. He had forgotten how nice this bed was. 

"I had so much sex on this bed just so you know." A jumper is launched towards Niall, wrapping around his head. 

"Thank god it did not come with the sheets then you nasty man." Niall laughs pulling the jumper away from his face. River is holding up a green strapless dress and unsure look on her face. 

"That is very pretty. You not happy with it?" River bites her lip holding the dress in front of her before hanging it up on the back of the door. 

"I love it but this is the first time I have had to dress up and go out since having Nolan and I have not exactly gone back to how I was before. Like my boobs are so much bigger then I am used to and my stomach still has this really flabby roll and my armpits are fat Niall. I did not even know armpits could be fat." Niall scoffs, reaching his legs out to wrap around River's waist and tug on into the bed. She lands on top of him with a yelp.

"You look bloody beautiful all the time. Honestly last week you were walking around my house in my old jogging bottoms and Harry's ugly shirt with ya boob out expressing milk and you looked so beautiful then. You are a mum, it don't get better then that does it? You grew and gave birth to an actual person. I would say you should be pretty proud of the flabby parts and the other stuff that comes along with it all. You are going to look so good in that dress. Watch out lads my best friend is a MILF." River laughs swatting at his shoulder.

"The lads don't need to watch out. I never want to have a lad ever again. This bed is getting a nice break." 

"Oh shame. The bounce factor is excellent. Very strong too it can take an awful lot. And the headboard works wonders for all kinds of kinky extras like this one time right, Harry had me-"

"Please shut the fuck up." 

"No but really you want to hear this, so he had me sit up here yeah-"

"Niall I swear to god."

"And then he tied this hand like this-"

"Kill me"

"And then this hand went back here, i'm flexible just so you know."

"I never needed or wanted to know."

"And then he lifted my leg up a little, and really that's a lot of weight for the headboard to take don't you think?"

"I think I need a new friend. Is this how Liam feels when he hears about Harry having sex?"

 

"It did not even creak River. Silent and strong. This bed was made for sex." Niall pats the wood smiling innocently at River. 

"Bring on the lads I say. Me and Harry will babysit and you can just." Niall start bouncing up and down on the bed making River jolt around hand flying up to cover her face. 

"Oh god please stop."

"Oh yeaahhh baby, let mamma take care of you." River rolls off the bed laughing loudly. 

"That is so wrong on so many levels." The bedroom door creaks open a little and Landon walks in giving Niall a bewildered look before holding Nolan out towards River.

"He is getting grumpy, thought he might want some milk?" 

"Could you just pass him to Ni? He is good at keeping him settled I just want to take a wee." Niall makes grabby hands at Nolan who's face is all screwed up ready to let out a howl.

"Oh i don't think so Mr. Mummy is going to the loo and then she will be ready so we just got to wait a tick." Nolan face smooths out as Niall gently rocks him and walks out of the room towards the loving room area. 

"I have been missing you, but you are going to love living here. It was one of my favorite places because I really liked watching all the traffic go by and when you are older you are going to love that too." Niall leans by the window looking down at the cars and buses slowly moving along. 

He had truly loved his time in this flat. The moments spent alone and the moments spend with Harry rebuilding their relationship. There was nothing but good memories here for him and he was so excited for River to hopefully have the same experience as he did. He knew living in a flat with Nolan would one day not be practical, what with taking the stairs when River had a pushchair to deal with but she seemed happy and settled here and that was all that Niall needed her to be at the moment. 

"You are good with kids." Landon leans on the wall in front of Niall, hand reaching out for Nolan's head.

"Well I love him so it's easy. Rae and Elliott too, they are like the best kids ever." Landon smiles, fingers brushing over Niall as he drops his hand.

"It suits you. Having a baby in your arms. Looks good." Niall smiled down at Nolan. This would be him one day, with Harry. He would get to hold a baby that was his everyday. He was getting better at waiting but it was still what he thought about most of the time. He could not wait to see Harry be a dad all over again, to get to do the bits he missed with Liam. 

Surely someone would pick them soon. They looked good on paper, the agency said so themselves. Their money situation was comfortable, the owned their own home and had steady jobs, no criminal records or even so much as a parking or speeding ticket between them. Niall had be honest about his past struggles but they had not needed to put that down. They looks so good. The only thing going against them was that they where both males. 

Should Niall have rang them and told them about the stalking though? What if someone suddenly picked them and they had a baby on the way and all this was still going on? Would the baby be in danger being brought into their home?

Niall stepped away from the window, arms holding Nolan a little tighter to him. 

Was he putting River and Nolan into danger by being here?

They could be watching now. They could be down there looking up through a camera lens. Niall could have lead them right to River's home. Would they go after her if they knew she was close to him? 

"We need to go." Landon frowned looking out the window before turning back to Niall. River comes into the room, arm already out of her top ready to feed. 

"The milk machine is ready to go." Niall is still clutching Nolan to him, eyes wide as he watched River walk over to him. 

"I need to go. We need to go." He passes Nolan over jumping when Landon places a hand on his lower back.

"You OK?" No. No he is not OK because he should not have come here when he knew some lunatic was following him. He could be putting everyone at risk and he should have just stayed at home. 

"Er...yeah...We will see you tonight love." River looks confused as Niall quickly kisses her cheek then rushes over to the door to put his shoes back on. 

He can hear Landon saying his goodbyes but everything sounds fuzzy and his breathing is too loud and he just needs to get out of this building and back home. He fumbles with the door handle until Landon eventually covers his hand with his own and helps him push it down. 

"Whats wrong?" Landon question once they have left the building and are rushing down the pavement dodging people. 

"I shouldn't have gone there. It was stupid of me. Its not safe, i'm not safe." Landon grabs Niall arm yanking him to a stop.

"Hey calm down. Why the hell are you not safe?"

"Because." Niall waves his hand around. "Because god knows who is probably watching us right now, and i'm sure we will be treated to some lovely photos at some point." A few people glance at Niall as they pass and he is sure he looks a little erratic but right now he does not care. "Wherever I am this freak will be and I just lead him right to were River lives so now there is someone else he can use to mess with me and Zayn is bad enough and god there is still Liam and Louis and Cassie and so many other people I could be putting into danger just because they are important to me and what if they use them to hurt me." 

"Niall that is not going to happen."

"How do you know!" Landon flinches back glancing around as more people start looking.

"I write books Landon, that's all i fucking do and now this shit is going on and all I do is write fucking books and I just want to be left alone. They are taking pictures of me asleep, they must have been in the house when River was there with Nolan all they had to do was slip into her room and they could have hurt either of them. And if Zayn ends up taking something then god know what will happen to him and I can't be the reason he loses his family or fucking kills himself. Maybe I should just leave and get away from them all until this stops ha-"

"Come to Italy." Niall stops, his chest heaving and his fist curled tightly at his sides.

"What?" Landon steps forward placing his hand on the back of Niall's neck.

"Come back to Italy with me. Spend a some time with mum and Beth, you could help out at the restaurant like old times and wait for this all to pass."

"I can't just leave." Could he? He would miss Harry and it would not be fair to just up and leave. But he could be helping them all. Zayn would be left alone and he would not have to worry about River getting involved. 

"You're not leaving, you are just taking a break from it all. The books done, you don't have to start the book tour yet. Its the perfect time to just get away." 

"I guess it could be nice. Without Harry though? I'm not sure if I could." 

"Harry would want this for you don't you think? To know you're relaxed and not freaking out about all this stuff. To know you feel safe. You're both big boys you can handle a couple of weeks apart right?" Niall frowns. Maybe that would be what Harry wants. It would give him a break too. This must all be a lot for him to deal with also. 

"Maybe." Landon nods, squeezing Niall neck. 

"Come home with me." Niall looks around, sounds suddenly clearer and everything normal again. 

"Yeah. Yeah, maybe I will."


	17. chapter 17

Niall is in a daze on the bus journey home. Landon pressed up to his side keeping quite as Niall thought over his offer. Going to Italy right now sounded like a dream. He had missed the place and the people there that he had gotten to know so well. He did not want to be away from his life here permanently of course but it sounded so nice at this moment. 

He could see himself back there. Helping tidy and cook. Talking to Daisy in the evening. Seeing the sights again. Curling up in his old bedroom. Finding out what Beth does with her time now. 

He would miss Harry and the kids and his friends but he would be coming back, it would only be two weeks at the most. Then he would come back and everything might have gone back to normal and he could spend some time with Harry before the madness of the book tour started. 

"We are here." Niall blinks out of his thoughts to see they have pulled up to the bus stop near the house. Niall gets up following Landon to the front of the bus, saying a thank you to the driver as the get off. 

Sonya's car is parked in the driveway when they reach the house and Niall is grinning straight away. He has called her plenty and had loads of face time calls with her but he has not seen Sonya in person for months now and he had really missed her.

He grabs Landon's hand making him walk quicker up the driveway. He kicks his shoes off and throws his jacket to the side already hearing Sonya's laugh in the kitchen. 

When he walks in she is leaning on the counter, Harry sat at the table, and she has a light blush on her face that Harry always manages to put there in seconds. She is still in her travel clothes and looks nothing like the hard arse business woman Niall knows she is. 

"There is my beautiful agent." Sonya puts her mug down moving quickly towards Niall so he can wrap her in a hug lifting her off her feet slightly. 

When Niall had first moved to LA he had lived with Sonya for six months while he saved and looked for his own place to live. They had grown really close in that time and Niall had felt a little awful when he left LA so suddenly without really telling her what he was doing. 

"You flirting with my man again?" Niall placed her back on her feet keeping his arms around her waist as she stepped back.

"Only because he flirted first." Harry leaned back in his chair smirking at Niall and winking. 

"That does not surprise me at all." Harry will deny it but from the very first time he meet Sonya he had flirted like crazy. Luckily Niall found it more funny then anything else. 

Landon walks in then, looking a little unsure as Sonya turns to him. 

"Well hello, another cutie." Niall hears Harry scoff.

"This is Landon." 

"Oh, Italy boy?" Niall nods earning himself a look from Sonya that he can't quite work out but is sure she will elaborate on later. Landon steps forward holding his hand out for Sonya who takes it with an amused smile.

"Nice to meet you." 

"Well he is cute and polite, Niall you do have good taste." Niall chuckles, glancing over at Harry nervously. Sonya kicked arse but apparently she had no idea when she was causing tension. 

"Can I get you anything? Did you get settled at the hotel alright? Flight good?" Niall steers Sonya's attention away from Landon slinging his arm over her shoulder and pushing her towards the living room.

"Yes all good, the hotel could be better but what do I expect when work is covering the cost. I do need to sit down with you and talk over some things from tonight but before all that-" She bends over the side of the sofa were her oversized bag is and pulls out a gift box.

"Engagement present!" She waves it round excitedly calling Harry in from the kitchen. Niall takes the lid of, passing it to Harry so he can take out what it inside. 

"Aww love." Harry takes it from Niall, cheeks rosy. Sonya had printed off Niall's dedication page, his proposal to Harry, and had it framed and dated. 

"What is it?" Niall takes it from Harry to hold up and show Landon who was once again hoovering in the background like he was not sure if he should be there.

"Sonya got my proposal to Harry framed for us! Thank you, now we can have it up to look at all the time" Niall turned back to Sonya to pull her into another hug missing the way Landon's face fell a little. 

"You are very welcome. Now less of this mushy stuff and more work stuff. I need to go through who is going to be there tonight and what is happening when. I hate these bloody things. Oh and don't answer anyone's questions on that bloody video. People might recognised Landon from them but we will have to just go with the flow on that one. Maybe nobody is interested anymore." Niall's social media ban had been lifted but he still had not gone on to check what people had been saying about him but he could tell from the way Sonya was flicking her hand about and the small grimace on Harry's face that people were still interested. 

He had a feeling after tonight going to Italy would seem more appealing. 

"You got the suits right?" 

"Yep, haven't had a chance to look at them thought." Sonya looked aghast and started shoving both Harry and Niall towards the stairs.

"What on earth have you been doing. What if they don't fit." Harry and Niall share a look before starting to laugh. 

"Sorry Sonya." 

"Yeah, sorry."

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Niall crouches down, mindful of his suit trousers as he shuffles around the side of the house. He takes a peak around the corner and spots the side of Liam's head by the back door. He straightens up again holding the plastic gun in his hand, finger ready at the trigger. He peaks one more time before letting out a war cry and running out and shooting foam bullets towards Liam. 

Liam does the gentlest roll Niall have ever witness but still manages to dodge the first three bullets sent his way. He jumps up to his feet holding his own gun out but just before he pulls the trigger Niall gets a bullet to bounce of his forehead.

"Aha!" Liam drops his gun to the floor and makes a gurgling sound before dropping to his knees, slowly and carefully of course, then falls to his side his suit jacket ruffling up around his sides. 

There is a click to Niall's left so he slowly turns hands in the air. Zayn points his gun to Niall's chest a scowl on his face.

"You just killed my lover." Niall splutters out a laugh before clearing his throat and putting a serious look back on his face. Before he can reply Matt walks up behind Zayn and places his gun to the back of his neck. 

"How could you, behind my back with Liam." Zayn rolls his shoulders his head tilting to the side.

"What can I say, I have a fetish." 

"I have no bullets left so can my dying wish be to know what this fetish is and why it lead you to an affair with Liam?" Niall asks waving his empty gun about. Zayn pretends to consider it for a second.

"I really like small dicks." 

"Hey." Liam sits up, tugging his jacket down. "Why does everything happen because of my apparent small dick." 

A bullet fly's through the air hitting Niall on the cheek before one hits Liam on the head, Matt on the arm and Zayn on his back.

"Fun's over boys." They all turn to Sonya who lifts the gun she is holding to her mouth blowing on it before going back inside with a wink. 

"What a woman." Liam says as Niall yanks him up of the floor. Zayn laughs patting him on the shoulder.

"Yeah well, try and keep it in your pants Loser. Macy has only just been gullible enough to take you back." Niall and Matt watch Zayn and Liam stumble back into the house bickering and shoving each other. 

"You think them two will ever leave high school?" Matt asks leaning his head on top of Niall's.

"Nope, not a chance." 

They walk back in to Sonya trying to gather everyone up at the door ready for when the driver arrives. 

The girls are all sat on the sofa already drinking wine, apart for River who has some water. Elliott and Rae are running around Harry and Louis feet and Liam and Zayn are still bickering. 

River gets up when she see's Niall hands going straight to his suit to start flattening it down when she reaches him.

"I hope you don't mind but I left Nolan with my mum, she is only in town for a couple of days so I thought I should let her help out." Niall covers her hands with his to stop her from fiddling. 

"That's fine love, i'm glad you can have a night off." 

Niall's eyes flicker towards then stairs just as Landon comes down them, hand pushing his hair back as the other plays with the buttons on his jacket. His eye meet Niall and he smiles, dimples on show as his hair falls back into his face. Niall's suit fits him perfectly and for a second Niall gets a familiar tug in his stomach that makes him quickly look away. Unfortunately he looks straight to River who seems to take in his flustered state. She raises an eyebrow questionable but Niall just shakes his head. Lots of men look extra good in a suit. Niall was sure he had the same reaction when Matt and Zayn showed up. Probably even Louis. 

"Car is here." Sonya opens the door ushering everyone out and towards the vehicle. Niall fusses around making sure everything is shut and locked so ends up separated from Harry and wedged between Cassie and Landon. Niall stays looking ahead but can feel Landon's stare on the side of his face. Once he has met Harry's eyes he relaxes slightly. Nothing is as good as looking at Harry. Especially Harry in his suit that Niall will most definitely be removing himself later. 

They get to the location of the party in under half an hour, a large Waterstone store in the city. Niall practically throws himself out of the car stepping back to let everyone else out and grabbing onto Harry as soon as he appeared.

"Hey before we go in I just wanted to say how proud I am off you." Harry cups Niall's face titling his head back slightly so he can lean down and kiss him. "This book is amazing and you are amazing and i'm so glad you get to do this, I love you so much." Niall nuzzles into his chest breathing in the smell of his cologne. 

"You excited?" Niall pulls back, slotting his hands with Harry. 

"Yeah, also a bit nervous after the video and stuff." Harry lifts their hands up to press his lips to Niall knuckles. 

"I don't think anyone will mention it love. It would be a bit tasteless wouldn't it, at a party for you. Tonight is just about how talented and beautiful and clever you are." Niall leans up for another kiss. 

"I love you." They walk over to the entrance where Niall is thankful to see two security men standing outside. That means anyone not on the guest list will be turned away which means Niall can put any thoughts of stalkers out of his mind and just enjoy his night. He takes a deep breath his hold on Harry loosening slightly as they step inside. 

xxxxxxx

"Landon my boy! In the flesh." Bobby pulls Landon in for a quick hug, hand coming down hard on his back. Landon laughs leaning over to give Lisa a kiss on the cheek. 

"Good to see you both, did you enjoy the holiday?" Bobby and Lisa had been in Paris for two weeks, it had been Lisa's sons birthday the weekend before and Bobby had wanted to take her mind of it a little. 

"Oh it was so beautiful, I never thought I would get to go." Harry and Louis both share a look as Landon falls into easy conversation with Bobby. 

"You know they knew each other that well?" Louis asks.

"No idea." 

"Oh good dads here." Niall hands slides over Harry back as he moves past him and towards his dad. 

"Ah the man of the hour." A waiter walks past holding up a tray of drinks. "It's my sons party." Niall rolls his eyes pulling both him and Lisa in for a hug. 

"Missed you both."

"Missed you too. So how long is Landon planning on staying then? You will have to bring him over for some grub Niall. Hows your mum Landon, she doing well?" Bobby had been a big fan on Landon when Niall was in Italy. Mostly because he thought Landon had pulled Niall out of his funk, as he liked to call it, and made him smile more then he had all year. Which was possible true to be fair. 

"She is doing great thank you, she said to say hello. As for staying I guess I don't really have a plan." Landon looks to Niall tucking a strand of his hair behind his ear a shy smile on his face. 

The offer of going back home with Landon still floating in the air between them. At some point soon Landon was going to want a proper answer from Niall but right now he was still torn between what to do. He did want to go. He had always planned to go back to visit but he had imagined taking Harry with him and for better reasons. 

"Niall." Sonya appears next to him hissing his name in her ear. She says a quick hello to Bobby and Lisa before tugging on Niall's arm muttering about his speech. She leads him towards the small stage that had been set up, past displays of his book that made him flush with pride. Not just for himself but for River too and seeing her artwork on the cover. 

Sonya goes up before him, to thank everyone for coming and to say a little bit about Niall and the book before calling him up. Everyone has gathered behind him and he gives Harry a nervous glance before getting up on stage. He really hates speeches but this was his most important book so far and this was a speech he has been thinking about for days now. 

He looks out at the small crowd. People that he would have to go a mingle with after his speech and impress because they were all somehow important to his book doing well. A few journalist who no doubt were going to drag the video back up somehow after tonight, if only to make an boring article about a boring author more interesting to read. He focuses in on his friends and family because they are all that matter at the moment. He clears his throat and steps forward. 

"I don't normally make a very long speech. I'm not as good at saying words as people would think, and I can't make funny jokes like my beautiful Fiance can." Niall can practically hear Louis eye roll. "I basically just stick to thanking people so I will still start of with that."

"Massive thanks to my publishing team, you guys worked ridiculous hard with me to keep things on track. My editors, you guess really shift through some shit to help me make this book what it is today." He smiles to himself at Sonya's scowl as he swears. 

"Maggie, who is not here tonight because she decided one of her other clients was more important. She takes a lot of crap from me and really gets my arse in gear when I lose focus. Sonya, my agent. You are a saint for putting up with me, thank you for working as hard as you did with me on this book. Helping me with my research and taking my phone calls at god knows what awful times of the day and night to help me clear my head, i bloody love you woman."

"River who done the artwork for my book, she is talented and beautiful and I love her a lot. My dad who played a massive part in me being ready to write this book. Thank you for the late nights spent talking to me openly and honestly about your thoughts and feelings during Ma's illness. It broke us a little, but i'm so glad we fixed it and got to where we are now. My friends Zayn, River, Matt, Macy, Cassie and Louis. You guys are stupid and crazy and I have no idea why I love you so much but I do. Thank you for being patient with me while I stormed about snapping at you all for being too loud or too happy."

"As you have all seen by now this book is dedicated to Harry and Liam. They are both my world, my rocks. Without them I would have completely lost myself when Ma died. Liam, thank you for having me back into your life so easily and for being a brother to me I really do love you." Liam mouthed 'i love you' back to him.

"Harry. Well I never know were to start with you and I think if i do then I won't stop because you are just the best most magical thing to ever happen to me. Thank you for loving me, for healing me and for being there every step of the way though this book. Also thank you for pulling me away from it all sometimes for reminding me I had a life outside of my laptop and forcing me to enjoy the here and now for a while. I can't wait to be your husband." Niall pauses for a moment taking the time to look over the faces of his friends and everyone else in the room. He clears his throat eyes meeting Harry who give him a small nod of encouragement.

"Cancer." Niall pauses again letting the word float around watching people as they let it settle over them.

"Horrible word init? Makes people feel uncomfortable. Some of you will have been lucky enough to have never been effected by it before, but you still feel this dread. You still know what it means and how horrible and disgusting it is. Most of you would have been effected and you will understand how it changes not only the person but everyone around them. When my Ma was told she had Cancer we did not know how bad it was or if it would or had spread but we knew as soon as that word was spoken everything would change. In some ways it taught us to laugh harder, live harder and hold each other that little tighter. When we first found out that she was more then likely going to die it was like all the colour had been drained from life. Nothing looked as good. Nothing smelt or tasted or sounded quite like it did before. Even Ma started to look different until one day it was like a different person was sat with us. Some things stayed the same. She still loved us the same, she still held us the same and she still smiled the same. My journey with Cancer was the hardest thing I had to do. It left me feeling alone, angry, out of control, bitter and resentful to anyone who was still smiling and going about like the world had not just ended." Niall cleared his throat again, eyes still firmly on Harry.

"It got better. Thinking of her now makes me smile. I will laugh at that thing she once said or done. I will feel comforted when I remember the way she used to tuck me in at night or greet me from school with milk and cookies. I miss her, god I miss her so much and I really wish she was here to see what I have accomplished. It's all for her. I traveled for her and I followed my dream for her. So really my biggest thank you goes to her, all the way up to heaven because she made me the man who is standing here today. She taught me to love myself. She taught me to fight for what I want. She taught me to be brave and loyal and loving. So thank you Ma! You are the best." Everyone raised their glasses up with a cheer. Niall waits for them to settle before he continues.

"A lot of things can end a life. Lots of people die. Its the way the world works, we all have to die at some point. Some of us are lucky to get to old age, to go peacefully in our sleep. Some have lives taking from them by others. Drunk Drivers." He looks to Liam.

"Homophobic bullies." Lisa places her hand on her chest, Bobby tucking her into his side a little tighter.

"Road accidents." River gives him a wobbly smile. "There are so many way to go, but Cancer just feels like the biggest one doesn't it? It almost like we just expect it. As soon as you hear about a death the first thought is Cancer. It just seems to be everywhere creeping its way into everything it possible can. This is why it was such an easy choice for me to write my next book around the subject. Not just because of my own journey but because of the thousands of people who have taken the same one as me. As part of my research for this book I visited some different hospital in different countries. America was the last place I visited, I went with my Agent Sonya." Niall looked over to Sonya who was already crying, knowing the story Niall was about to tell.

"The hospital we visited had a child's unit dedicated to Cancer. At first me and Sonya were not sure if we wanted to go. It seemed too heartbreaking and we knew we would be a mess as soon as we walked past the doors. We decided to go anyway. We met an eight year old girl called Julie." Niall swallowed, taking a few deep breaths.

"Julie had leukemia and had been in and out of hospital since a week after her sixth birthday. I spent two weeks with Julie learning about her and her parents Cancer Journey. During one of our talks she told me about how at school they had been told about discrimination. How some people discriminate others by the way they look or sound or act. Julie thought it was funny that it was Cancer that never discriminated people. She knew it was a horrible disease that took so many lives but it never judged, she said. She said It did not care if you are white, black, gay, male, female, young, old, nice, mean, disabled or different in anyway. It did not go to just the rapist, the pedophiles, the killers. The people who had hurt just because they wanted to. It also went to the people who had only done good, the loving parents the brothers the sisters the friends. It goes after people who save and protect. I remember being really shocked by this eight year old girl who seemed too wise for her years. She was so clever and it was so unfair and cruel that she had to think about his. At the age of eight she should not know about Cancer yet there she was living with it." He looks down at Elliott and Rae, both sitting on their dad's hips. 

"I asked her if she was scared of what this could mean for her and she told me she was but she was also lucky. She was lucky because she got eight years when some only get days. She said she got to love her parents and have them love her back. She got to make memories with he friends and she got to hug her dog. She said she was lucky because she got to live." His voice wobbled slightly so he focused back in on Harry taking a couple of deep breaths.

"I absolutely fell in love with that little girl during them two weeks. Her parents are two of the most strongest people I have ever know. To be able to walk into that hospital everyday and see their child go though that and still smile and laugh and play is beyond amazing."

"I left America and I came home and I knew what I wanted my story to be and I wrote and wrote and wrote. Two days later I received a phone call from Julies mum. She had passed away in her sleep. Peaceful and ready." The whole room is silent, everyone looking right at Niall.

"Cancer.... Cancer needs to be beat. We need to find a way to stop this thing because it just keep stealing those who do not deserve to go."

"Paper Houses is about two family's. Two homes. One facing the possibility of losing a child. One facing the possibility of losing a mother. One might die. Both might die. Both might live. You have to buy the book to find that one out." A few people laugh, the tension broken up a little.

"We have a few representatives from a handful of Charities that are dedicating so many hours into research and help for people suffering with Cancer and loss so please be as generous as you can tonight and give some donations please because fuck you Cancer we are coming for you." Niall steps off the small stage to a loud round of applause and straight into the arms of all his friends. He is shaking as Harry places a wet kiss to his lips.

"Well done. I really fucking love you." Niall relaxes hands curling into the back of Harry's hair. 

The next hour is spent going from person to person, Harry on his arm the whole time as Niall chats away. He talks to a couple of the journalist who thankfully seem more interested in his engagement to Harry,which everyone now knows about thanks to the many copies of his book laying around, and his work with the charities. 

Eventually the boring suits leave and the ties come of and the shirts are untucked and Sonya starts drinking. Bobby and Lisa go when it get close to midnight yawning and kissing and hugging everyone they pass. 

Zayn goes over to the CD player that has been softly playing music all night and starts to fiddle until eventually he gets it on some radio station playing chart music and turns it up, a member of staff nervously watching him. 

He grins and dances his way back over to everyone, grabbing hold of Matt and spinning him around. The girls join them and Niall takes Sonya's hand he other clutching tightly onto her wine glass. 

This is Niall's first release Party with everyone there so he is not really surprised when they all get a little drunk on whatever wine is being handed about and the music get a little louder even though the poor staff look like they are about to have a heart attack. 

Niall passes Sonya off to Harry and she goes happily and blushing as she grabs hold of his arms. Harry smiles cheekily down at her, hand low on her back. Niall see's a sparkly blur go past and figures it must be Rae, who a few moments ago looked ready for bed but seemed to have hit her second wind. Elliott was last seen snoring on the floor on top of everyone's jackets. 

"Hey you." Zayn presses up behind Niall, hands spreading out over his stomach as he pulls him back. Katy Perry is blaring out now and Niall can feel the heat coming off Zayn as they both start to dance. Niall lays his hand over Zayn's, looking up for Harry as Zayn starts to nuzzle into his neck. He spots Landon dancing and laughing with Sonya and feels bad that he had not stuck by him for a lot of the night. 

He finally finds Harry, now dancing by Matt and looking right back at him. 

"You smell nice." Zayn nibbles on Niall's ear, making his eyes widen. Harry just shrugs turning to Matt. 

"You drunk?" Niall turns his head so Zayn can hear him. 

"Only had like two glasses, why?" Zayn laughs nudging Niall's head so he is facing forward again. Louis goes past him doing the robot, Cassie following behind do the same. Zayn's hand wonders down lower over Niall's stomach so he tightens his grip to keep it above a suitable level. 

"Boring." Zayn chuckles in his ear, fingers digging into him before releasing again. Niall looks down, can see Zayn's hand shaking. He turns his hand over, fingers skimming over his palm to find it clammy. 

"You ok?" He shouts over his shoulder. He knows Zayn gets anxious sometimes in these kind of settings but he was sure mostly everyone had left by now. 

"I'm good. Like so fucking good. You look so hot tonight, fuck I want to be inside you again." Niall yanks his hands away from him but Zayn is grabbing at him again, pushing his face back into Niall's neck. Niall panics, looks back over to Harry who is motioning to his eyes. Niall frowns and mouths 'what'. Harry points at Zayn then to his own eyes. 

Niall turns in Zayn's arms grabbing the side of his face and lifting it up. His pupils large and dilated. Niall stumbles back his knees going weak.

"What did you take?" Zayn slaps his hands away from his face.

"Nothing, what the fuck. Just had like two glasses of wine of whatever. Don't have to take something to want to fuck you." He pulls Niall back into him hands reaching down to grab at his arse. "Always want to fuck you, fucking love you." Niall is yanked back and Matt and Harry are both in front of him pushing Zayn away. 

"What did you take?" Matt grabs hold if his chin, face red with anger. Cassie grabs Rae as she runs towards them then quickly goes over to where Elliott is sleeping. 

"I haven't taken anything. How many times do I have to tell you i'm not on drugs. My fucking kids are here." He shoves Matt away stumbling back. 

"Niall." Niall turns to River.

"Take the kids out now." River nods then runs over to pick Elliott up, Rae still with Cassie. They both leave, River looking back at Niall once more. 

"Your bloody eyes Zayn! Stop lying to me and tell me what you took." 

"Nothing!" Zayn screams in Matt face, fist pounding on his chest. "I didn't-fuck! I didn't" Niall steps forward, close to crying as he moves back to Zayn. 

"We are not angry OK. We just want to help and make sure your alright." Zayn lets out a whimper arms curling around Niall's neck.

"I didn't Niall. I can't lie to you. You know that. I didn't, my kids are here and I don't want to. Why do people not believe me. I feel...I feel like I have but I haven't." Niall holds him tightly, hand pressed to his back. 

"I believe you. You haven't taken anything, i'm sorry for thinking you had. Should we go home?" Zayn nods into Niall's shoulder, hands moving all over his back and into his hair. 

"I'm just excited for you. Happy. That's why I feel like this. So happy for you." Niall leads him outside, stumbling under his weight. The others are all standing by a taxi looking worried as Niall practically carries Zayn out. 

"He can't come home." Niall turns to face Matt, shocked by how cold his voice sounded.

"What?" Matt shakes his head.

"He can't be around the kids like this. This could trigger a relapse and the kids cant see that. He is not coming home." Zayn laughs bitterly, leaning over Niall towards Matt.

"Fuck you. I don't want to go home anyway, fucking arsehole."

"He can come back with us, we will get another taxi." Harry says, already looking out onto the road.

"Yeah I will go home with them." Zayn rubs his nose over Niall's cheek both of them stumbling back into the wall. Liam reaches out to help steady him.

"We can fuck yeah. Me you and Harold.Don't need Matt this time do we." Niall ignores him and waves away Liam as everyone starts to pile into the taxi. Zayn looks over to Matt raising his middle finger in the air.

"Fuck you! Gonna get my cock sucked." Harry grabs Zayn around the shoulders and yanks him back to stand with him.

"Your kids are in there so how about you keep it down yeah." Zayn scoffs but stays quite, twiddling at Harry tie as they way for another taxi to show up. 

Sonya comes out with Landon as Harry finally gets a taxi to stop, looking more then pissed off.

"The journalist was still in there by the way."

"I am so sorry Sonya, i have no idea what happened but can we talk about this tomorrow we need to get him home." She glares at him then walks off without another word. 

Harry pushes Zayn into the taxi and Niall and Landon get in after them. 

"I love my kids, I want to go home now I changed my mind." Niall drops his face into his hands ignoring the way Zayn was prodding at him with his foot. 

xxxxx

Landon helps Niall get Zayn up the stairs and onto the bed while Harry gets him some water and a change of clothes. Landon leaves them to it, letting them know it was fine to come get him if they needed help with anything. Harry and Niall stay quite as they undress Zayn.

"You gonna kiss me." Harry grits his teeth, yanking Zayn up so he can pull a top over his head.

"Not right now. We are going to just sleep this off." Zayn pouts falling dramatically back onto the bed.

"Matt does not believe me, thank you for believing me guys. I love you." Harry and Niall both sit on the end of the bed, Niall tucked up on Harry's lap as they watch and wait for Zayn to fall asleep. After two hours of watching him wiggle around the bed or getting up to calm him down when he started shouting and swearing about Matt or crying about how much he loved everyone or stopping him from trying to undress himself again Zayn finally fell asleep letting out soft snores. 

"I can't believe this has happens." Harry digs the palm of his hands into his eyes. 

"I think he is telling the truth. He wouldn't lie to me." Harry holds his hands out.

"He was high, he was clearly on some kind of drug Ni." 

"Maybe someone spiked him." Niall climbs onto the bed to lay out next to Zayn, brushing his hair out of his face. "Maybe this person, who has been doing all this stuff was there tonight. They might have put something in his drink." Harry doesn't reply and after a moment of silence he suddenly gets up and marches over to the bedroom door pulling it open.

"What are you doing?" Harry stops head falling down as he takes a few deep breaths. 

"Nothing- just nothing that's what i'm doing." He closes the door again walking back over to the bed and getting in the other side of Zayn, switching the lamp off. 

They hold hands over Zayn's waist and Niall knows he wont sleep. Long after Harry has drifted off Niall stays awake watching Zayn sleep, placing his hand to his chest every now and then before going back to hold Harry's hand. 

He was so scared. 

He was sacred who this person could be if they were at the party tonight. Was it someone he trusted?

He was terrified what was going to happen when Zayn woke up. 

This was going to kill him. 

Was this all Niall's fault?

It has to be. They are doing this to hurt Niall. 

Leaving had to be the best option. He would have to go with Landon to keep everyone here safe.


	18. chapter 18

Niall wakes up to an empty bed and the sound of gagging and retching. He tumbles out of bed, the blanket getting tangled around his feet as he tumbles towards the door. 

Zayn is curled around the toilet, Harry sat behind him rubbing at his back. Harry moves out the way as Niall drops to his knees, head pressing into Zayn's damp hair. Zayn retches again, body tensing up and shaking as bile splattered into the bowl. Niall holds him until he stops, Harry gathering up some tissue and wiping it across Zayn mouth and nose. Niall pulls him back until his head is in his lap, stroking through his hair as he falls back to sleep. 

Harry scoops him up, Niall helping to lift him keeping a hand around his ankle as they walk him back into the bedroom and lay him back down.

"I'm going to see if I can get hold of Matt will you be OK?"  
"Yeah fine." Harry kisses his forehead then leaves the room closing the door behind him. Niall slides his arm under Zayn's head and rolls him until he is laying across his chest, head tucked under his chin. His t-shirt is damp and clinging to his back so Niall lifts it a little to get some air onto his skin, fingers running up and down gently. 

He has no idea what mind frame Zayn was going to be in when he woke up and no idea how to deal with any of them. 

He leans down to kiss at Zayn's head his eyes slowly closing as he falls back to sleep. 

xxxxxxx

Niall wakes up with a gasp sitting up so quickly his head spins. He rubs at his eyes freezing when he notices Zayn stood at the end of the bed staring down at him, hands twisted together. His top is off now but he still has Harry bottoms on. His hair is a mess, sticking up in all directions. His skin looks clammy, his eye red. 

"How are you fe-"

"I need more." It feels like the ground drops and Niall is falling. He clutches onto the bed sheets shaking his head.

"No you don't" Zayn nods kneeling onto the bed, hands clasped in front of him.

"I do. Harry locked the doors so I can't leave and he keeps watching me and I just need something, anything to get through this. I will stop I promise I will stop but just for now I need something."

"Zayn no you just need to come back and lay with me and we will do this together. You're not going to let some arsehole spiking your drink ruin everything. Please." Zayn whimpers crawling the rest of the way up the bed until he is spread on top of Niall.

"Who done this? I don't understand what they are trying to do." Niall holds him tightly blinking away tears, his throat burning with the effort to not start crying.

"I don't know love. I'm going to fix it, I promise I will make it all stop." 

"I feel so sick and it hurts and I just think that if I can have a little more it will make it all feel better. I just want to feel better and you want me to feel better too don't you." Niall's lip wobbles so he presses it to Zayn's head, his hair tickling at his nose.

"Of course I want you to feel better, and you will. We just have to get past this bit love." 

"It's always so hard. It's always there. Maybe it would just be easier to give in." Niall clenches his eyes shut a few tears escaping, dripping slowly down his cheeks. 

"It's not easier. It feels like it now but it's not. Think of the kids and Matt, you could lose them. You are their dad. You're a fucking dad so you will get through today and you will go back and be the dad they need." Zayn cries into Niall's chest, holding into his hands and soaking his t-shirt. Niall has never felt so helpless before. He has no idea how to make this even the slightest bit easier for Zayn. He wants to help. He done this to Zayn he should know how to help. 

"I can't remember much, but it was just us lot there right? Who was there that would have wanted to do this to me." 

"It was just us towards the end, and Sonya and the staff. A journalist too I think. I'm as lost as you are." The door clicks open and Harry comes in holding two mugs of tea. He places them down on the side.

"I spoke to Matt." Zayn raised his head up from Niall, wiping at his eyes. 

"What did he say?"

"He said he will be here as soon as he can. He has to wait for his parents to come and take the kids, he just wants to get them settled. He thinks Rae has sensed something is up so she is being a little difficult but they are fine. He just wants us to stay with you, to do whatever we need to do to keep you comfortable, so you just let us know what you need." Zayn pulls on his bottom lip looking up at Harry. 

"I just want this, with Niall. Can you stay with me?" He asked turning to Niall.

"Yeah of course I can. We can lay here all day if you want." Zayn nods, wiping at his face again. 

"Thank you." Harry ruffles his hand in Zayn' hair looking sad as he steps back. 

"Just... do whatever he needs." Niall swallows then nods, watching Harry back out of the room until the door clicks shut again. 

Niall rolls onto his side, tucking Zayn's leg between his and flopping his arm over his waist. 

"How can I help?" Zayn shrugs, bumping his nose into Niall's.

"Just talk to me."

"About?" 

"Like, I don't know..... plans for your wedding or whats coming up for work or travel stories. I love your travel stories." Zayn's hand wraps into his hair, fingers rubbing at his scalp. 

"You cold? Do you want me to get you a fresh t-shirt" Zayn licks at his lips.

"No I'm fine. You could like take yours off yeah? Please." Niall sits up a little slipping his shirt off and throwing it to the floor. He settles back down, Zayn moving closer until they are pressed together.

"Travel stories please." Niall lets out a breath that sounds shaky and strained thinking through all the things he could talk about.

"I went to this national park in China, it was so beautiful and you would love it."

"I love beautiful things."

"I know, it's why you look in the mirror so much right." Zany snorts, big toe digging into Niall's foot. "Anyway, its like where they done some filming for that Avatar movie apparently and it was super cool. There was this boy that was apart of my tour group and he kept like spouting out all this random facts about the place, was super annoying."

"So it was like having Liam there?"

"Funny enough that is exactly what I thought at the time. Made me miss him so bad that day. He would have been a total nerd and like read all the books before he went just so he would know everything before he got there. I liked learning things as I walked around." 

"Its cause his dick is small." Zayn sniffles, his breath tickling over Niall's face. "He has to compensate by making himself seem smart. It doesn't work." 

"You are mean to him."

"Yeah but that is how it's supposed to be. He would hate it if I was suddenly super nice all the time. I would kill for him though, like if someone messed with him they better watch out cause that is my job and he is a puppy. Don't tell him that though I will deny it and claim that i would watch him suffer." 

"You are such a soft twat."

"I know this. Now keep talking."

xxxxxxxxxxxx

Things don't really get bad until later. Zayn is sleeping again so Niall has gathered up all their clothes from yesterday and was sorting them out to be washed. He was emptying pockets when he found the bag of pills in Zayn's trousers. 

He stands in the middle of the kitchen looking down at them for too long. He should have just jumped into action straight away and made sure they where gone. Whoever had spiked his drink had obviously put them there planning for him to find them when he was in a state today. 

What would have happened if Zayn had found these this morning when Niall was still asleep? 

He finally goes to throw them down the sink but a hand comes from behind him and grabs at his wrist. Niall gasps closing his hand into a fist as Zayn's other hand reaches around to take the bag. 

"Give them to me."

"No." Niall yanks on his hand, trying to get out of Zayn's grip but Zayn just holds on tighter pulling Niall back towards him. 

"Give them to me. Fucking give them to me!" He shouts, shoving Niall back until he slams into the wall, head hitting it with a thud. Niall lifts his leg up shoving his foot into Zayn's stomach to push him back.

"No." Zayn comes towards him again so Niall holds out his free hand.

"Back off! I will not give them to you so unless you want to fight me for them then you need to stop." Zayn stops chest heaving, his eyes wild as he looks from Niall's face then down to his closed fist. Niall slumps back into the wall, hand dropping to his side. As soon as Zayn see's him relax he lunges for him grabbing at his hand and pulling it up to bite down at it. Niall cried out slamming his other hand into the side of Zayn's face. Zayn stumbles to the side, clutches at his cheek and looking up at Niall in disbelief.

"I told you that you would have to fight me for them." 

"We could...we could take them together." Niall can see Harry in the corner of his eye, standing just inside the door but he keeps his eyes on Zayn holding a hand up towards Harry hoping he will stay put. "It would be like before, we used to have fun didn't we?"

"No we didn't. Not really, it messed everything up remember. I lost Harry and Liam and you nearly died." Zayn shakes his head reaching back out for Niall. He holds his wrist more gently this time, thumb rubbing over his like he thinks it will make Niall release his hold on the bag for him.

"We will be careful and it would only be the once. Matt said to make me comfortable and this will do that. It will help me." The look on his face is heart wrenching. He looks so lost and scared and it sends Niall back to five years ago when everything was such a mess.

"I will help you but we are going to find another way. We are getting rid of these." Harry edges into the room more moving slowly. Niall's best chance to get rid of the pills is to get them to Harry. If Zayn really wanted to he could overpower Niall easily, but Harry was bigger and stronger.

"I want them. I want them, oh god I want them Niall please. Just one." He starts clawing and Niall's hand as Niall pushes against him to get him to move back.

"You're hurting me." Zayn stops for a second, eye roaming over Niall's face.   
"You told me you loved me and now you're hurting me." Zayn's eyes widen, his lips parting. His digs his nails into Niall's hand again, his chin wobbling as he let go.   
"It's just too hard. I think about it everyday and I always have to be strong and think of the kids or think of Matt. I know they are bad and they will take away so much but sometimes I just want to be able to give in and not think about anything." Niall nudges him back a little more, his hand running up his back through the sweat gathering there until it's tangled in his hair.

"I know love. I understand how hard this is but you are strong and you can live without this poison. I want you to so badly. For me, can you do this for me?" Niall runs his nose over Zayn's cheek, pushing their foreheads together.

"You love me?" Zayn nods, eyes closing as his hand falls away from Niall's fist and comes to rest on his hip.   
"I do. I love you"

"Then do this for me. Make me happy Zayn. For me." Niall holds his arm out, bag dangling down as he pressing his lips to Zayn's.

Zayn gasps pulling him in closer as Harry moves forward taking the bag from Niall.

Niall cups Zayn's face eyes still open and on Harry as he lets Zayn lick into his mouth.

Harry tips the pills down the sink, turning the tap on to wash them away.

Niall steps back pulling away from Zayn who blinks a few times, in a daze.

It takes him only seconds to notice Niall is now empty handed. His face crumbles.

"You fucking arsehole." He lunges forward but Harry is there quickly arms around his waist yanking him back.

Zayn starts screaming, kicking and hitting out at Harry until he sends them both to the floor. Harry manages to get on top of him pinning his arms down as he carried on screaming at Niall, legs thrashing. Niall kneels down next to him, stroking through his hair, crying as he watches Zayn struggle to get free.

"I hate you. I fucking hate you, you're a liar! Your not helping me. You said you would help. I hate you, I hate you!" Zayn slumps back breathing heavily as the fight leaves him and he starts sobbing.

"I'm sorry." Harry loosens his grip on him, looking at Niall his own eyes wet with tears. "I didn't mean it, I'm sorry. I want Matt. Where is Matt?" Niall sits back against the wall, knees pulled up to his chest. Harry gets off Zayn and pulls him onto his lap cradling his head to his chest as he rocks them back and forward and Zayn sobs loudly. Niall rests his head down his own tears spilling over. 

He never thought he would have to see Zayn like this. Was that naive of him? To believe that this was something that only happened in the past. Some horror story that Niall sometimes heard about. 

Now its here and its happening right in his house and he loves Zayn so much and it is the worse thing because they can't do anything but watch him suffer and struggle until he is somewhat fine again. 

He forgets is the problem. He forgets that Zayn deals with this struggle everyday while they all go about life like normal. 

Harry eventually gets up, leaning against the counter to balance himself with Zayn in his arms. Zayn's eyes are still open but he is blinking rapidly so Niall thinks he is close to falling asleep again. Niall stays in the kitchen while Harry takes Zayn back to bed, taking the moment to try and clear his head a little. 

Harry comes back quickly, rubbing his hand tiredly over his face. Niall holds his hands up for Harry to help him but up to his feet going straight up on his tip toes to kiss him.

"How much longer is Matt going to be?" Harry sighs massaging his hands over Niall's shoulders.

"No idea. He just said he had to wait for his parents to get to the house to pick the kids up. He sounded really upset." Niall just hoped he was not angry with Zayn and that he at least believed him when he said his drink was spiked. Zayn had no reason to lie, if he had done this to himself he would want help and he would tell them what he was doing. 

"I'm sorry about you know, the kiss. I just wanted to distract him enough." 

"I know love, it was fine. I understood what you were doing. We are not exactly experts on what to do are we, so I think we handled that OK."

"It's so horrible to see him like that. I can't understand what anyone would have to gain by doing that to him? Tear a family apart and possible kill him. Just why? is it all just to get at me? Has this person seen how close me and him are? Do they know we all slept together? I don't understand at all." Niall steps away from Harry suddenly feeling agitated by having him so close.

"Niall we don't even know for sure if this is all linked, its just a guess at the moment. Don't get worked up about it."

"How can I not." Niall frails his hands around pacing back and forward in front of Harry. "I must be putting everyone in danger. Then again nothing has happened to you has it. Why have they not tried to do anything to you when you would be the main person I don't want hurt." Harry looks away finger going straight to his mouth to bite on. Niall stops pacing, eye narrowing as he looks at Harry.

"Why do you do that?"

"What?" Niall huffs, pointing at him.

"Whenever I go on about this you look like you are stopping yourself from saying something. If you have a suggestion then just say it because right now i'm willing to hear anything if it means we could be working this all out." Harry drops his hand looking hesitant as Niall waits for him to speak. Niall is so desperate that he is sure if Harry suggest the freaking pope was doing all this he would actually take it into consideration. 

"Landon." Niall frowns.

"What about him." Harry rolls his eyes moving to lean against he counter.

"I think you should consider that he is behind all this. It started right before he showed up. I think he has some kind of obsession with you and he would hurt the people closest to you because of it. I'm not the only one who thinks it could be him either." Niall laughs. Was Harry actually serious? Niall knew there was no way Landon would be capable of something like this. He was far to good to even think something like this up. He was not even in the country when it all started, and he had clearly been shocked when he found out about it all and really freaked out after finding all the photos of Niall on the walls. 

"You are wrong. You all just have an attitude with him for no reason at all and want to blame him. Why would he want to scare me? Why would he go after Zayn and not you?"

"He has said some things to me though. Things that I think he knew would upset me. He has not really hidden his intentions from me since he got here." Niall shook his head. This was starting to really piss him off now. The way everyone had been so rude to Landon since he got here. So what if he used to be Niall's boyfriend. They were good friends and Landon should be able to come and see him without being accused of something so evil. 

"No, that is not even a thought we are going to consider. If he said something to you and you took it the wrong way then its probably just because you where being too sensitive. It's weird for you, i get that but he is not here to get me back or mess with any of us."

"So what I think does not matter? You know I would not say I thought it was him unless I really had a reason to think it was."

"Yeah well your reason is that you are jealous of him being around me. You just need to grown up and understand that we can be around each other and it can be just friends." Niall can see the anger building up in Harry eyes but knows from the way he is holding himself that he is trying to keep it in. Niall is saved from hearing whatever bullshit reply he has by the front door rattling then a knock. 

"We are not talking about this again." Niall leaves the kitchen, taking Harry's keys out of his work bag to unlock the door and let Matt in. 

He is still in his pyjamas and looks like he has not slept all night. 

"How is he?"Niall steps to the side to let him in, closing the door behind him and dropping Harry's keys back into his bag. 

"Asleep again I think but he has not been good. You going to take him home?" Matt goes to the stairs stopping as he climbs the first step.

"Yeah I think that is where he will want to be. My parents can't have the kids overnight and he is probably going to be a bit all over the place for a few days do you mind having them sleep here tonight? I know its not so easy now you don't have the spare room but they will be happier here then anywhere else."

"Yeah of course we can, we love having them. Anything you need us to do we will do it." Matt looks relived. He had probably spent most of today stressing about what to do with the kids. 

"Thank you. And thank you for bringing him back here, I know it must have been hard for you to deal with." 

"It's fine. Just be easy on him, this is not his fault." Matt nods then runs the rest of the way up the stairs. 

Harry is stood by the kitchen door and Niall can feel his eyes on him. He keeps his head turned away, waiting for Mat to bring Zany back down the stairs. 

"I never want you to try and bring Landon into this again. I get that him being here can be hard for you sometimes but you don't get to say things like that." Niall feels like so far Landon is the only one who has actually suggested something that could actually help him and everyone around him. He had spent time trying to work this out just like the rest of them had. 

It just showed Niall that this was messing with all their heads. His only doubt about going to Italy was leaving Harry behind. Maybe Harry needed it just as much as Niall did.

xxxxxxxxx

The kids arrive just after their dinner time all freshly bathed and ready for bed. Niall leaves Harry to talk to Matt's parents as he take Elliot straight up into the travel cot Harry had already set up from him in their bedroom. He gives him a kiss goodnight then leaves the room, closing the door just halfway so he had a little bit of light.

Landon is coming out of his bedroom just as Niall is passing.

"Oh hey I thought you had gone out." 

"Nah, just wanted to stay out of the way. I'm still a stranger to Zayn really so i didn't think he would want me hanging about." This is why it was annoying him so much that nobody was really taking the time to get to know Landon. He was always so thoughtful.

"Well Rae is downstairs if you wanted to see her before we put her to bed." Landon follows Niall down the stairs going straight over to Rae to join her playing with her Barbie doll she had brought. Niall watches them with a smile until Harry closes the front door and starts talking about sorting them out some food.

"Would you like me to cook for you both?" Landon asks, helping Rae to brush Barbies hair. "You have both had a crazy day and you can just focus on getting this little lady to bed and relaxing." Harry looks like he is about t refuse the offer so Niall quickly answers.

"That would be great Landon. You never got round to cooking for us the other day so you do owe us a nice meal." Landon chuckles, getting up from the floor saying a goodnight to Rae before going into the kitchen. Harry picks Rae up and holds her towards Niall so he can give her a kiss but he keeps his eyes off him and goes upstairs without a word. 

Niall take a deep breath and decides to ignore it and busies himself with checking the locks on the windows and closing the curtains. He goes to lock the front door, remembering he had left his house keys in his suit pocket that was still upstairs. He goes back to Harry's bag rummaging around to find his set. 

He lifts the flap back when he can't find them and looks inside, moving a few papers around figuring the keys had slipped to the bottom. 

"Does Harry like fish Ni?"

"Yeah, he likes anything so just go crazy." He hand closes over a small box and he lifts it up a little to see what it is.

"You want a drink?" Niall looks down at his hand his breath catching in his throat.

"I'm going to make a coffee so if you want one too?" Niall shakes his head yanking the lid of the box open. 

"Ni?" Niall covers his mouth with his hand looking up at the stairs where he can hear Harry singing to Rae and Elliott. 

He shoves the box back in the bag, hand shaking so badly he almost drops it to the floor. He closes Harry's bag up, spinning away from it and stumbling towards the sofa. 

There had to be an explanation. It can't be what Niall first thought. It's Harry. It can't be. 

"Niall, hello. Drink?" Niall jumps head snapping towards Landon.

"Umm." He clears his throat. "No. No thank you." Landon goes again not seeming to notice Niall state. Harry comes down the stairs not even glancing at Niall as he goes into the kitchen. 

Niall goes back over to Harry's bag yanking it back open and looking inside again sure he is going to discover it was just him imagination. 

It's not though. It's still there. A small box of Condoms. A pack of three with only two in. 

Harry is hiding Condoms in his bag.


	19. chapter 19

Niall sits up in bed, blanket tucked up around his knees as he watches Harry get ready for work.

He doesn't think he could ever feel about anyone the way he does Harry. The amount of love he has for him is so beyond what Niall thought possible. He grew up with two parents who loved each other unconditionally but it still didn't prepare he from the feeling he would get every time he looked at Harry. So strong that sometimes it knocked the breath out of him.

He couldn't imagine him sneaking around. It's not something Niall thinks is in Harry nature. He loved Niall back just as strongly. Didn't he?

Harry comes over to the bed and bends down to kiss Niall.

He wants to reach up and pull him back down into the bed. To never let him leave.

Was it someone at work?

He pulls Harry shirt out of his trousers so he can run his hand up his back, feel the way his muscles tense as he bends.

Had someone else done that?

Clung onto his back as he fucked into them?  
Dug their fingers in.  
Wrapped their legs around him.

"I will take the kids off Landon and get them back to Matt so you can stay in bed." Niall forces a smile onto his face eyes on Harry's lips as he speaks.

Someone else might have kissed those lips. While Niall was at home looking forward to Harry coming home someone could have been with him. In his classroom or his car. Kissing him.

"Have a nice day. Love you." Niall squeezed his eyes shut removing his hands from Harry.

"Love you too." Their lips met for a short sweet kiss before Harry straightened up and Niall almost cry's at the idea if him leaving the house.

Was it a woman?

Someone who could give him what Niall can't.

What if he got her pregnant.  
He would leave. He would do the right thing by the baby.

Not a woman. Niall couldn't cope if it was.

Once Harry is gone Niall gets out of bed, pushing his feet into a pair of Harry's old slippers. Ridiculous ones that look like elephants that he used to wear all the time.

It's still early in the morning. Harry had to go into work early to catch up on some stuff he missed with all the time off he had been having.

Or did he?

Niall stopped hand flying up to his chest that was twisting painfully.

Had he got behind at work or had he been missing someone enough that he left Niall in bed to go see them?

He is out the house and standing in front of Liam's door without really remembering leaving.

He looks around him, dazed. Liam's street was a nice one, it showed how well Liam was doing for himself and Niall had always taken the piss out of him for living here.

He was still in his pyjamas, stupid slippers still on his feet and the box of condoms in his hand crumbled from where he had been gripping it so tightly. God, he didn't even let Landon know he was leaving the house.

He knocks. He has no idea why he does because normally he charges into Liam's house without a care for what he could be walking in on.

It takes a while for the door to open and when it does Niall is faced with a sleep crumbled Liam.

Niall holds the box up.

"Um I'm gonna say no thanks. But flattered mate." His voice is croaky and Niall would feel guilty about waking him up before his alarm went off but well, he doesn't.

"I found them in Harry's bag."

"Right....and that requires you coming here because..." Niall just blinks back at him, then realized he is expecting an explanation.

"Me and Harry don't use condoms. They were hidden at the bottom of his bag and one was gone." Liam looks at him for a moment before letting out a sigh and stepping back.

"I will put the kettle on."

Xxxx

"You know he is not cheating on you."

Liam and Niall are in what Liam calls his 'man cave'. The basement that he had spent days turning into a game room that Niall is sure was more Macy's idea to get rid of him for a couple of hours a day. It's dark and cosy and Niall has no idea why they don't hang out in it more often.

"Do I?" Niall is pacing back and forward in front of Liam, who is sat on the small sofa wrapped up in his dressing gown looking at Niall like he has lost his mind. 

"Well you bloody should. His whole world is you, I don't think he even remembers the rest of the world even exists half the time. He would never do that, he couldn't it would kill him."

"Then why would he have condoms in his bag? Opened and used." 

"Maybe they are an old pack and he just forgot they were in there." Niall shakes his head.

"No, the last time we used some was at Louis wedding and it was a bigger pack and a different brand. That box is in the bedroom. This box was for something else- someone else."

"I think you are being paranoid." Niall groans throwing the box onto the sofa next to Liam.

"Of course I am! It's all I can be at the moment. Jesus Liam my head is getting so fucked up and i feel like I am losing my mind." Liam gets up taking hold of Niall by his shoulders and leading him over to the sofa to sit down.

"Things are pretty crazy right now so I think it's normal to feel so messed up over it all, but I think you are looking into this too much. It's dad Niall, if i had any reason to believe it was even possible that he would cheat on you then I would be over there like a shot making him explain it all." Niall already knew this wasn't Harry's thing. Harry is more the type to sit down and have a honest conversation if he was to find himself attracted to another person. Or if he had stopped wanting to be with Niall he would not react by going out and shagging someone, he would tell Niall. Niall knew this but he still felt like he had to overthink everything lately. It was like he could not trust anything, even his own thoughts and what he knows to be true. 

"I know, but just...what if he is Liam. What would I do." Liam gives him such a sympathetic look that he feels like shoving his face into the cushions and screaming. 

Was he actually just going crazy?

He had never doubted Harry before. Someone could have literally walked up to him and said they where sleeping with Harry and Niall would not have believed them for a second. Now all it took was an unexplained box of condoms and Niall was trying to work out how to live his life without Harry. 

"Do you have any other reason to think he could be cheating? Does he seem distant? Snappy? Wanting less sex?" Niall flops back, the box crumbling under his back making him frown. He needs to just burn it. Stupid condoms messing with his head. 

"He seems normal I guess. We have argued more since Louis wedding but that's when all the weird stuff started to happen so that is just the stress. We still have the same amount of sex, like most days and stuff." Niall shifts, feeling weird talking to Liam about it. He can go to Liam about anything, always has, no matter how gross or embarrassing but his sex life with Harry had been something he just never thought Liam needed to know about. If he had an issue with that he would go to Zayn or River. 

"Hey, its fine to talk about sex with me you know. I get its a bit different because its with my dad but you're my best friend, I want you to be able to come to me about anything." Niall smiles, reaching across his lap for Liam's hand curling their fingers together. Liam starts to play with Niall's engagement ring, slowly twirling it around. 

"Its slowed down a little but I have never felt worried about it. It just seemed natural. We got busier and then we had River stay with us and we were all dead on our feet with Nolan and then Landon got here so we couldn't exactly be all over each other like we normally would be. We still have sex most days, or fit a hand job in at least." He watches Liam's face for a reaction, any sign that this was too much information with him. Liam just smiles and nods for him to carry on. 

"Our sex life is really good Li, we explore and we trust each other and we don't ever get too embarrassed to ask for what we want." Niall thinks back to the day at the hotel, when Harry got off on Niall calling him a girl. Can still remember the feeling of his leg muscles tensing and the whimper he made when Niall told him how good his 'pussy' tasted. They never spoke about it though, which kind of leads him to his next point.

"We don't talk as much as we used too, there is sex but there is not as much intimacy."

"What do you mean?"

"We used to spend hours talking. After sex we would just cuddle and talk and in the mornings we would get ready together and talk about random stuff, we had dinner together and talked about our days. Now I barely know what he gets up too. I forget to ask about work and his class. We have sex and then we both go to sleep and I don't know if he had a good day at work or what he had for lunch and I don't know what funny joke he made up in his head."

"You must talk."

"There have been a couple of times where we have made the effort to get together and talk about whats on our minds but only because we have gotten so stressed that we cant ignore it anymore. That's not how me and Harry work, we don't make a slot in the week to get together and chat, we are supposed to be talking all the time. It used to come so naturally, I would suddenly know every detail about his day and it was just normal."

Is that something that could make Harry stray?

A nice coworker who just simple sat and talked to him one day? One thing leading to another. Would he have kissed them, or would they have kissed him?  
Would he have hesitated, taking a moment to think of Niall, to then think of that lost feeling of being so close? 

"You really think that is all it would take? A few weeks of bad communication and he is off jumping into bed with someone else. He would tell you if he felt neglected in any way, or if he thought you were both heading in the wrong direction." Again Liam is right, but come on, a opened box of condoms hidden in the bottom of his work bag. its not like he confiscated them off someone at work, he helps teach kids under eleven for Christ shake.

"You ever stop to think this could be the person who is fucking with you? We know they are pretty good at breaking in and planting things. Maybe they put them in Harry's work bag?" That, god why had Niall not even considered that.

"Would they put them in his work bag though? I never go in there, this time was only because i left my house keys upstairs and was to lazy to go get them. Wouldn't it be better to put it in the pocket of his clothes for me to find, or in his car?" Liam just shrugs.

"I don't know how this person's brain works Niall. I just know that it makes more sense that Harry is now being messed with. This person seems to want those closest to you gone" if this person is going to start doing things to Harry. Start messing with their relationship Niall won't be able to stick it.

Harry is the final straw for him.   
He can't let it carry on.

"I think I need to leave." Liam looks horrified his grip on Niall's hand tightening, the band of his ring digging into his skin a little.

"Leave dad? You can't do that!".

"No, god no. I just mean leave here, get away for a bit. Leave you all alone to get on with life like normal. Maybe if I go this person will stop, lose interest. Landon has offered for me to go back to Italy with him." Liam scoffs practically throwing Niall's hand away from him.

"Of course he did. Probably him that put the condoms in Harry's bag. Bit convenient ain't it, he shows up and this stuff happens and then he just swoops in with an offer to get you back where you were before."

"Not you too!" Niall's get up snatching the box up and shoving it into his jumper pocket. "Look, Landon is a really nice person and if you all got your heads out ya arses you would all know that about him. I know you all think he has something to do with all this and you all seem to have forgotten it all started happening before he was even in the same country as us. I know Landon, he would not do this to me. To anyone." Liam holds his hands up, a look on his face that clearly said he did not agree with Niall at all.

He just didn't get it. Nobody was taking the time to get to know Landon. They just asked him questions to put him on the spot and made it clear they didn't feel he was welcome here. He didn't know he had such a rude bunch of friends. Didn't they care Niall was happy to see him? Couldn't they make him feel welcome just for him? He was so excited when he first saw Landon and now everyone just keep accusing him of all this horrible stuff.

Maybe Niall should leave just to get away from them.

"Hey mate." Liam talks in a soothing tone while getting up off the sofa, dressing gown gaping open to reveal his bare chest. Niall stops moving. He hadn't even realised he had been pacing again. Hands twisting in front of him.   
"Niall, I'm sorry I haven't been around much. I had no idea you where getting yourself into such a state." He was. He was getting so wound up but he was also scared and part of him wanting to shut himself away and hide from everyone and another part of him wanted to run around screaming, demanding to know who was doing all this fucked up stuff.

The last time his emotions had felt this haywire was just after his mum had died. When he didn't know what to do or think and there were so many things to work out and get over.

"I'm just so done. I just want it all to stop and for things to go back to normal. I don't know what me or Zayn have done to deserve this. And now Harry" He leans into Liam, forehead resting on his shoulder and Liam wraps his arms around his waist in a hug.

"I don't know either. Just talk to dad about what you found, and talk to him about everything else all the way to what he had for lunch today." Niall smiled, nosing at his neck the smell of sleep still on him.

"Sorry I woke you."

"I'm glad you did. Always come to me. I know you are all giving me and Macy space to sort us out but please just come to me as soon as you need me. You're my brother Ni, I have all the time in the world"

"Step dad."

"Brother."

"Future step dad."

"Just brother."

"I love you, thank you."

Xxxxxxxx

"Thank you for indulging me so much today." Niall shrugs, taking a large bite of his hot dog careful to not drip ketchup down himself as he leans back into the wall of the shop behind him. 

"It's been great. I had forgotten how much fun London could be from a tourist point of view." Landon beams at that, leaning by Niall's side foot nudging into his.

"Been nice doing something just us two. Your friends seem really cool but they really don't like me do they?" Niall pokes at his food, grimacing slightly. 

"I don't know if they hate you or if they are just being stubborn arseholes."

Once Niall had gotten home from Liam's and forced himself to get in the shower and dressed appropriately he had started to feel terrible for not spending more time taking Landon out to do stuff. He was sure he was pretty understanding of why Niall had been a little distracted but he was determined that he was just going to forget about everything and go and have fun. 

Until Harry got home and Niall would have to talk to him about the condoms and the possibility that Harry was either cheating or now being targeted by this creep too. He might also have to bring up the fact that he was seriously considering going to stay with Landon for a couple of weeks. 

"Oh well. I am here to spend time with you not them so its whatever." They had gone on the Harry potter walk that Landon had mentioned days ago, spent some time walking around Covent garden, took stupid pictures standing in front of Big Ben, had a ridiculous expensive lunch in a restaurant that Landon demanded they go in so he could get some decent food and visited Downing street before Niall managed to convince Landon to eat some street food. 

It had been non stop hopping on and off buses and so much walking but Niall had laughed so much today and it was great to see Landon get so excited over every single thing he saw. 

It was getting late now and Niall felt like his legs were pretty close to falling off and thankfully it was only one more bus trip and they would be able to flop at home. 

"What else is on your list of things to do before you go back to Italy?"  
"Why, you trying to get rid of me?" Niall chuckles, bunching his napkin up in his hand ready to throw away.

"Not at all, pretty happy to have you here for as long as possible. Its been really nice."

"Yeah it has." Landon takes Niall rubbish for him, throwing it in a bin on the way to the bus stop.

"I think after today I have got the hang of how the buses and stuff work so if you want to spend some time with Harry or get work done I can venture out on my own." Niall probably did have some work he needed to do but Sonya had not been on his arse yet so he was probably good for a few more days. Actually he had expected an angry phone call from Sonya today about what happen at the party. Maybe her going back to America without a word was his punishment. 

"Nah its all good. Harry has work so you might as well keep me busy." The bus pulls up and they get on, Niall paying the driver before walking down the aisle to find a seat. 

"Cool, well I really want to get some good pictures of the Tower of London and Tower Bridge. Then there is the Palace and Westminster Abby. And oh Trafalgar square. These places are probably like super boring to you right?" Niall laughs laying his head on Landon's shoulder.

"We can do all that and it wont be boring with you. I had so much fun today." He feels the press of Landon's cheek on his head and he almost drifts off before they reach the stop by the house. Landon nudges him taking his hand and helping him to his feet, keeping a hold of him until they are off the bus. Niall arches his back yawning loudly before spinning and heading towards the house. 

It was getting dark now but the streetlights made it so Niall could see Harry's car in the driveway. He felt nervous and glanced at Landon like he would somehow know what Niall was worried about. 

Niall had come so close to telling Landon his fears of Harry cheating on him all day, only just stopping himself. He had to talk to Harry first, it would do no good if Harry found out he went to Landon over it. 

"Hey Lan do you mind if i just go talk to Harry about something?"

"You have been with me all day, go do whatever. I can cook tonight again if you want?" Niall nods and thanks him, kicking his shoes off before going into the kitchen were he knows Harry will be. 

"Hey beautiful." It's so crazy to Niall that this man finds him beautiful.Harry himself was the definition of the word and Niall had actually managed to claim him as his own. 

How was he going to live if Harry had found someone else.

"Can we talk upstairs please?" Harry frowns looking confused but he gets up motioning for Niall to lead the way. They pass Landon in the living room, Harry greeting him as they pass and head up the stairs. 

"Should I be worried?" Niall doesn't answer him and instead goes straight over to the jumper he was wearing this morning to take out the condoms. 

"Ni? Your making me a little nervous. Did something happen? Are you OK?" Niall moves to stand the other side of the bed deciding that it was best to have something between then if this was all about to blow up. 

How was he even supposed to react. Should he get angry and shout? Stay calm and just pack a bag and go? Let Harry explain why he would do it or just leave? 

Liam does not think Harry could cheat. Niall knows it's not the kind of thing Harry could bring himself to do. He can't help but think the worse. 

"Niall, come on." He sounds nervous. Which considering their lives at the moment is not surprising, anything could come out of Niall's mouth right now as far as Harry is concerned. Niall takes a deep breath, swallows, takes another second to take in that his life could be about to change forever then places the box on the bed for Harry to see. 

He leaves it a moment then looks up to meet Harry's eyes.


	20. chapter 20

His expression is the same. No different to if Niall had placed a cup of tea down in front of him. He clasps his hands in front of him looking from the box to Niall.

"Nia-"

"I don't want excuses." Harry steps back looking startled.

"Why would I make excuses baby?" He laughs picking the box up and waggling it around. "If you want to start using condoms then that's fine. Although I am confused as to why you suddenly want to. Would have hoped for a bigger box too." He is laughing.

Niall had been freaking out about this all day and Harry is just laughing.

Fuck

He doesn't even know if that is a good thing or not. He feels some of the tension leave his body anyway.

"I found them in your bag." Harry was reading the back of the box. His eyebrow raised and he looked up.

"No you didn't."

"Yes I did actually. Right at the bottom. With one missing." Harry pulls the tab open and looks inside.

"Right. That make no sense. Why would I have these in my bag? My condoms are in there." He motions towards his bedside table then leans forward to open it like he has to prove to Niall he is telling the truth.

Niall knows they are in there because he knows the box from Harry's bag are not theirs.

"Baby." Harry puts his knees onto the bed crawling to the middle. "Do you think I was cheating in you?"

"I don't know. Maybe." Harry is across the bed in seconds clamping himself around Niall.   
"Oh baby boy. I could never ever do such a thing. It wound hurt me, physically hurt me to be with someone else. How long have you been thinking this?" Niall leans into Harry's touch. He is telling the truth.

How could be even let himself think any different.

What is wrong with him.

"Since last night." His voice wobbles. It's been horrible. So fucking horrible to think of Harry with another person. 

"Oh Niall. I should be angry with you, like really angry." He hits Niall's shoulder but its gentle and he smooths his hand over it straight away. "I can't believe you thought that. Baby that must have been so hard why didn't you come to me straight away."

"I was scared. I didn't want to lose you for good." Harry looks sad, hands moving up to cup at Niall's face pulling his head down so they are looking directly at each other. 

"Could never, never lose me. You are all I ever want. Just you." He tugs him down for a kiss and Niall falls into it tangling his hands into Harry's hair, gripping the strands between his fingers while pushing his tongue past Harry's lips desperate to taste the inside of his mouth. Tea and sugar and something so Harry that his toes curl and he lets out a whine. 

Harry had not cheated and that was such a good thing and it made him want to cry and hold him so tightly that he cant breath. It makes him pull and tug and scratch until Harry is up off the bed and crowding Niall into the wall body pressed hard to his. 

Its not all good. Someone put them there. Someone wanted Niall to think Harry cheated. Someone wants to take the people Niall loves from him. That makes him want to push Harry away and run until he knows everyone is safe. 

Harry spins him around making him gasp out in surprise. He yanks his hips out until Niall is bent over then he grabs his hands and places them flat to the wall. Harry slides his hand under Niall's top and around to his stomach. 

"You really thought I could hurt you like that?" Niall closes his eyes, head hanging down. He had, he had doubted Harry. His Harry. 

"I'm sorry." Harry hums, breath on the back of Niall's neck as he starts to open his jeans. Niall chokes on a moan, his hand pressing into the wall more as Harry pushes his hand under the material of his jeans and cups his dick.

"You think I would need anything other then this." Niall starts to pant as Harry's hand slowly rubs up and down his length, growing harder with each stroke. He stops suddenly gripping Niall tightly in his fist. Niall moans head flying back.

"Answer me baby."

"No. No, fuck. Only me." 

"That's right baby." His hand leaves Niall jeans and he is about to complain but then Harry is yanking his jeans all the way down to his ankles boxers falling with them. 

"You are all I need. Your my favorite everything." Harry curves his body over Niall's so he can mouth at his neck. 

"My favorite person, my favorite sound, my favorite smell, my favorite taste. Nothing compares to you." He pushes Niall's top up until it is bunched under his armpits, his cock now hard enough that its curving towards his stomach. Kisses are trailed down his back making him arch out. Harry stops just above the swell of his bum then latches on to slight podge on his hips and starts to suck a mark there. 

"Harry." The kissing stops, Harry removing his lips with a wet smack. 

"Harry what?"

"Please. Oh god please." He can't remember the last time he felt this turned on. His whole body was hot, sweat already gathering along his hair line and his lower back, his arms and legs trembling. His cock twitching and leaking everything Harry touched him. His stomach a constant flip. 

"So polite." He parts Niall's cheeks tongue lapping over his hole twice before pushing past the ring of muscles. Niall cry's out turning into a mess in seconds. Harry holds his waist, pressing his face into Niall arse as he licks and sucks and moans into him. 

He waits until Niall is wet. Dripping with his spit and sobbing into the wall, arse sticking out as far as he can get it desperate for Harry tongue in deeper. Then he adds two fingers, straight down to the knuckle. It drags another wail out of Niall the stretch so good. Niall loves feeling his body stretch for Harry. Getting ready to take him. 

Jesus. This was not how he thought this was going to go. 

"I think you need reminding baby." Harry rises back up, fingers pumping into Niall hard and fast. Niall can barely take in that Harry is talking. The effort to listen is far to great when all he can focus on his the push and drag of Harry's fingers. "That there should never be a reason to think such a thing of me." Yes, Niall thinks, Yes remind me. Show me.

He cant get his voice to work so he just clenches around Harry, pushes back a little more, noises leaving his mouth that he cant control. 

Once harry has managed to get three fingers into him. Stretched him and teased him he yanks them out and steps back. Niall leans back, blindly searching for him, wanting the contact back. 

He hears the familiar sound of the lube being opened and relaxes. He wants to look. See what Harry is doing. See how he looks, probably messed up and wild. Lips red and swollen from his arse. He can hear Harry's clothes hitting the floor. Can hear him getting closer again. Can hear the slick sound of lube being spread over his cock. 

He braces himself. Expecting Harry to take him like this. Hands on his hips, hopefully holding him tight enough to bruise. To remind Niall that he only wants him. Instead Harry pulls him back and spins him again, hands going to the back of his thighs as he lifts him up slamming his back into the wall. Niall's lips part his legs wrapping tightly around Harry waist to help keep him up. 

Harry waits until Niall looks more focused, until his is looking at Harry with a soft happy expression. Then he lowers him, one hand gripping him tightly the other lining himself up with Niall's hole. Niall's back slides on the wall a little then its nothing but the burning stretch he loves. 

"Do you think I would ever bury myself inside anyone but you?" Niall shakes his head frantically his finger digging into the back of Harry's neck. 

"Only me. Only me. Only me." It turns into a chant mixed with moans and cries and gasps as Harry fucks him. He tightens his legs around Harry waist, his back sliding up and down as Harry keeps his movements fast, short hard thrust that push Niall closer and closer. 

"You are so tight like this baby. Fucking hell, so tight on my cock." Harry is the first to come. Spilling into Niall, eyes closed and head thrown back as he cries out Niall's name. 

He pulls out, gently placing Niall back to his feet and quickly drops to his knees grabbing Niall's cock and pumping it fast. Niall comes over his face, body jolting and his breath getting knocked out of him with the force of it. Niall kneels down in front of Harry, scooping up his come with his thumb then pressing it into his mouth watching the way his cheeks hollowed out as he sucked and swallowed. 

He pulls him in for a kiss as soon as his face is clear both moaning at the taste. A mixture of Harry and Niall with the sour taste of his come. 

Niall was never going to second guess Harry ever again. He loved him. He knew Harry loved him because it was in every look and every touch. Everything Harry did was because he loved Niall. 

They might be going through a rough patch because they are stressed and they might be talking a little less but it can be fixed. It will be fixed. 

Harry lays Niall out on the bed, grabbing the box of condoms and throwing them across the room with a growl making Niall giggle into his neck. It smells so good there that Niall can't help but bite down a little, hips rocking up when Harry hisses. 

He pushes into him slowly this time. Giving him lazy kisses and running his hands everywhere he could reach until he settles on holding Niall's wrist above his head so his body stretches out. It's slow and sweet and Niall feels like he is melting into Harry. He can feel every inch of him drag inside him. He feels so full of him that its nearly too much. Its like Harry is seeping into him. His smell and his taste covering him. They keep their lips together breathing each others air, Niall's breath stuttering as he lifts his knees back to hook his legs over Harry shoulder. It pushes him in deeper making him slam into Niall's prostate. Niall keens, heels digging into Harry shoulders his wrist straining in Harry hold. 

"I love you." Niall nods, his own words stuck in his throat. His body tenses up, back curling off the mattress as he starts to shot over his stomach. Harry looks down at him, eyes wide and shining as he takes in the way he looks. Niall uses the small amount of energy he has left to squeeze himself tighter around Harry and let out a sinful moan. It has the effect he wanted and Harry slams into him one more time with a drawn out grunt filling him with come once again. 

"God baby." Harry jolts, fucking into Niall once more as he rides out his high then carefully pulls out. Niall sighs, enjoying the feeling of Harry's come already dripping out of him as he moves them on the bed so he can throw the blanket over them. Niall turns onto his side pressing himself into Harry as much as he can, skin tacky but not caring about the thought of peeling himself of Harry later. 

"Harry?"

"Yeah."

"What did you have for lunch today." Harry's hand starts to sooth over his back, his lips pressed to his forehead. He can feel Harry smiling. 

"Me and the kids had veggie burgers."

"Was it a good day?"

"It was yes. Missed you a lot like I always do. Kids were fun today though." Niall snuggled down into the blanket move, hand spread out over Harry chest were he can feel his heart beating, still going fast from making love to Niall.

"I love you so much Harry. Sorry for not coming to you straight away to talk." Harry shushes him, running his hand over his damp hair.

"It's OK, we got it sorted. I'm just sorry you had to spend all that time thinking such a horrible thing. This person, whoever they are, if they are going to try and push us apart we need to work extra hard to make it all bring us closer." Niall raises up onto his elbow she he can look at Harry. 

"Yeah?"

"Yep. Let them try whatever they want. We will always trust each other. We will go to each other about everything. We are expecting it now, we know they are messing with us. They can't do anything to tear us apart when we know that its what they are doing. We love each other and that's all we need to remember." Harry's right. Niall now knows that anything bad that happens is probably because of this person. They can try whatever they want but they will know the truth. 

"You think we will be OK?"

"Of course." Niall sighs, resting his chin on Harry's chest.

"There was something I was thinking about doing. It might make things easier for everyone." 

"What's that then." Harry stokes across Niall's face, finger catching his lip and tugging it playfully before releasing it.

"Landon offered for me to go back to Italy with him for a couple of weeks, let things settle down here." Harry's body stiffens, his face falling.

"What?" He sits up, forcing Niall to do the same as he was draped half over him. "You said no right?" He grabs hold of Niall's chin. "Tell me you said no." Niall bats his hand away, annoyance flaring up.

"I said I would think about it actually. He think's it's a good idea." Harry's mouth twist into an angry sneer as he clambers out of the bed. 

"Of course he thinks its a good idea. That is exactly where he wants you. Away from me and with him and you're stupid enough to do it."

"Hey! Why are you being so mean, I just want whats best for everyone." 

"Then stop being so fucking gullible. You are not going anywhere with him."

"I think I get to decide that." Harry grabs Niall's face again, fingers digging into his cheeks.

"When it comes to you going off with some freak you get no decision. I forbid you from going anywhere with him." Niall scoffs moving back and away from Harry's grip. 

"You forbid me?" Niall gets off the bed stomping over to his wardrobe to get some fresh clothes. "You don't get to forbid me to do anything Harry, you don't own me. If i want to go then I will go."

"And you don't care about how i feel about it at all? I don't feel comfortable with you going there with him." Niall yanks on some trousers, his foot nearly going through the knee with how hard he shoves them inside. 

"You literally just went on about how we trust each other and yet you don't think I can spend two weeks away with him?"

"Its not you I don't trust its him! You are so blind to what he is doing. If you saw what I see then you would never say yes to going. This is was he wants and your just letting it happen." Niall grabs the first jumper he finds, more then annoyed when he realises its harry's but ts already on and taking it off would just make him look like a child. Niall slams the wardrobe door shut his head falling into his hands. 

How the fuck are the fighting again. 

"If he gets you out there Niall he wont let you come back. You're not going. It is not an option and we will not discuss this anymore." Niall glares at him then nods once walking past him. 

"Were are you going?" He had to get away from him. Niall doesn't answer Harry, he just keeps walking knowing he cant follow with no clothes on. 

What the hell is happening to them that they can't seem to go five minutes without arguing. 

xxxxxxxx

"Hello." Niall kicks his shoes off and shrugs of his coat as he walks into Zayn's and Matt house. 

"Dining room." Niall walks down the hallway and into the living room towards the dining room. He finds just Matt with both Rae and Elliott eating dinner. 

"Hey." He gives Elliott a kiss on the forehead, the only part of him not covered in food, then grabs hold of Rae taking her seat and plopping her on his lap. She giggles then shoves food into her mouth. 

"Hows he doing?" Matt pokes at his food with his fork, shoulders raising up before dropping down again. 

"Not sure, he has been downstairs all day." Niall looks in the direction of Zayn's art room. He can hear the music just faintly. 

"Is it OK if I got talk to him?" Matt waves his hand about. He looks so tired. 

"Go ahead. Maybe he will talk to you. He is probably still struggling. Possibly angry over it all so be careful, he will be unpredictable right now."Niall slides Rae off his lap, flicking her broccoli off her plate to make her laugh. 

He goes down the stairs careful as he passes all of Zayn's pieces, resisting the urge to reach out and poke and some of weirder looking things. He finds Zayn in the paint room crouched over looking like he is mixing some paint up. 

Arctic Monkeys are blaring out this time and Niall takes a seat not wanting to disturb him just yet. Zayn straightens up, his head turning just slightly as he notices Niall, then he focus back on the wall in front of him. He had stuck up four sheets of large paper and by the looks of it had just been attacking it all with paint. 

Niall wonders if it made sense to Zayn or if it was just a jumble of angry marks to him too. 

In the corner closest to Zayn there is a massive pile of screwed up paper and Niall can almost feel the frustration Zayn must have felt at each failed piece. It was probably like how Niall felt after spending hours writing to only look back and hate what he had typed. 

Niall watched patiently, enjoying the music and watching Zayn work until he had covered all the paper on the wall. Then he dropped his brush and tore it down before throwing it with the rest. 

Well, if it helps maybe its not a bad thing. 

Zayn grabs more paper sticking it up before making his way over to Niall. He stops when their knees meet, lips pouted out as he looks down at him. He leans forward, bending at his hip, until his lips are near Niall's ear.

"You look as shit as I feel." Niall waits until he straightens up again then nods. He does feel pretty shit so he figured he looked it too. Not even an hour ago Harry was making love to him and Niall felt like everything would be OK. Now he is here and they have argued again. 

Zayn yanks him up and Niall goes easily letting Zayn drag him over to the wall and shove a brush in his hand. Zayn picks up his own, dips in in the paint then starts to make random markings. Niall chews on his lip, watching Zayn before bending down and shoving his brush into what could possibly be the nicest orange Niall has ever seen. 

He glances at Zayn. He feels a little self conscious. This was Zayn's thing. Niall could barely colour between the lines in Rae's book. Zayn didn't seem to be paying attention to him so he just shrugged and slapped the paint on the wall. How hard could it be to make some random marks. Apparently really hard because now Zayn is watching him and he is scowling. 

Zayn moves so he is standing behind him and grabs his hand adjusting Niall's hold on the brush. 

"Relax." Niall rolls his shoulders trying his best to relax. 

"Just don't think." Don't think? God, when was the last time he just didn't think. He puts the brush to the paper, Zayn hand still gripping his wrist as he moves the brush back and forward. 

"Just let you hand move. You're not creating anything, you're just feeling." Zayn lets go of his wrist, hand falling to his waist. Niall let's his hand move on its own, brain switching off as he twisted and flicked laughing when paint splattered over his face. It actually was quite relaxing. Not having a plan in his head, just making some marks. Like a toddler. Just enjoying the colour and the feel of making something, even if it was a lot on nonsense. 

everything was nonsense really wasn't it. All the things him and Harry keep fighting about was nonsense. Harry being too protective or Niall being too sensitive. He just wants them to be a team again. 

They couldn't be a team if he was thousands of mile away. 

He was stupid. 

Niall was stupid. 

This person wanted them apart and he was just going to up and leave. Make them be apart. 

"I have been an idiot." Zayn bumps his forehead into the back of Niall head.

"Thought maybe you had." Niall turns in Zayn arms, almost covering him in paint. 

"Before I rush off to redeem myself, how have you been today?" 

"Shit. Really fucking shit. Gonna be alright though I reckon so don't worry about me babes. You go redeem yourself." Niall passes his brush to Zayn planting a wet kiss on his cheek before bolting out of the room and back upstairs.

"Bye everyone!" He shoves his shoes on, nearly tripping in his hast and grabs his coat as he is running out the door. 

When he gets home Landon is curled up on the sofa watching Friends. 

"Where did you go?" 

"Zayn's. Hey thanks for the offer to come to Italy but I don't think I will. Want to stay here with Harry." Landon just blinks back at him then Niall is running up the stairs. 

Harry is in bed, shirtless and reading a book. He lowers it to his lap his mouth opening to talk.

"No shush you." Harry's mouth snaps shut his eyebrow arching. "I just like ran from Zayn's house and I don't run, like ever, so I get to talk first." Harry just nods. 

"I am done OK. I am so fucking done with fighting with you. I love you and your like this perfect adorable little shit and all i want is to fucking squeeze all my love into you because i have too much and it drives me crazy sometimes. I'm not going to go to stupid Italy because how stupid is that! Leaving you is never the option, not the right one anyway. So yeah, we are not going to argue anymore. We are the best team ever! The best-est. So we are going to start acting like it right." 

"Umm yeah I pretty much agree with all that, i think." Niall goes over to the bed flopping on top of Harry. 

"I really love you."

"I love you too. I don't want to fight either. Not about such silly things when we should be sticking together. They want this Ni, they want us to fall apart. We need to come out of this stronger." Niall nods crawling up Harry's body more until he can sniff at his hair. 

"We will come out stronger. We are going to talk things through as they happen. Stay calm and discuss it all. We will come out of this so good darlin'. Then i'm going to make you my husband and raise kids with you." Harry flips them over so Niall is on his back and his is hoovering above him. 

"Me and you, always." Niall pecks his nose.

"And forever. You are my everything Harry, i'm going to be better. It's all about you and us from now on." 

"You have paint all over your face."

"Shh, we are having a moment." Harry chuckles kissing Niall's chin. 

This person did not stand a chance when dealing with Harry and Niall together.


	21. chapter 21

Niall drops the wedding book down on the table then plonks himself down on Harry's lap.

"We should get married in a castle." That earns him a playful nip.

"You are a bit of a princess but I think before we pick the venue we need to come up with a budget that we can both cover equally." Niall huffs turning on Harry's lap so he can pout in his face.

"It's our wedding. Can't I spoil you with castles and nice things, you like pretty things." Niall puts his arms around Harry's neck. His hair is all messed up from sleep, curling around his ears and hanging across his eyes a little. Niall wants to marry him in all the castles.

"I'm marrying the prettiest thing so I'm very happy with all the pretty I already have." Niall scowls, growling at Harry while biting down on his cheek.

"Fine Mr cute bum we will do a budget first, but if I want to organise a few surprises then I get to." Harry rolls his eyes but gives in. Niall wonders how easy it would be to secretly pick a castle and have Harry not find out.

"What family are you inviting?" Harry hand sneaks up Niall's top, fingers spreading over his stomach. A small shimmer of arousal zips up Niall's spine.

"Just mum and Gem."

"Nobody else?"

"Nope. Lou's family will all come." Harry's teeth drag along Niall's neck, Niall drops his head to the side to make more room for him.

"Hmm. Well all my family will come. The Irish love a reason to drink. Flowers."

"You're a flower."

"We need to decide what flowers Harry. You're so distracting." Niall yells, knees slamming up into the table when Harry grabs his crotch through his pyjama bottoms.

"You are talking about our wedding day and you don't expect me to get a little touchy? Baby, I could come so hard hearing you talk about this." Niall falls back, practically turning to putty on Harry's lap and he pushes the heel of his hand down into his hardening dick.

"If I could I would bend you over this table right now and fuck into you dry. Make you stretch around my cock." Niall moans turning his head to the side to kiss at Harry jaw, his legs parting more.   
"I'd make you keep talking. Telling me how you're going to marry me as I fuck you so hard against the table you would have bruises on your hips for days."

"You can. Please. Yes. Now." Bruise me. Mark me. Fuck me. Is all Niall can think as Harry yanks his head up for a kiss his hand wrapping around his clothed cock.

There is a creek on the stairs and before Niall can even think about it Harry has lifted him off his lap and placed him on the chair next to him.

Niall blinks in a daze. He is achingly hard, face flushed from how turned on his is as Landon comes into the room.

"Morning." Harry smiles, licking his lips before snapping the wedding book shut.

"Well I need to get ready for work. We will continue this later babe." Niall watches Harry get up, stopping to put his mug in the sink sending Niall a quick wink before leaving. Niall looks at the book then to the empty chair Harry had been sitting in then he is up stumbling towards the stairs.

"Now. We could continue this now." He slams into Harry's back, pushing him quicker into the bedroom hands already tugging down his trousers.

"I will be late for work. Unhand me." Harry slaps at Niall's hands, laughing when Niall's fingers dig into his side.

"Never unhanding you again. Bed. Get me on the bed and fuck me." Oh god, Niall is so horny it's unreal.

"I really don't have time." That's just cruel. Why is Niall even thinking about marrying this idiot when he can be so mean.

"You're not going to leave me like this."

"I think I am. You will be nice and desperate for me when I get home."

"I'm not marrying you anymore."

"Yes you are." There is laughter in Harry's voice and he is letting Niall undress him now and Niall already knows he is only letting him because he needed to get undressed. He hates him, honestly.

"I will be so good for you. It will be quick. A hard dirty fuck before work." Harry shivers and hesitates for a second, almost convinced.

Niall wants it so bad. Wants Harry to just throw him on the bed and use him.

Niall tears his own clothes off and lays out on the bed on his back, legs spread wide.

"Come on Harry. Come on." He grips his own cock moving his hand lazily up and down.

Harry looks down at him, bottom lip sucked into his mouth, cheeks red and eyes dark and wide. Then he shrugs before turning away and carry's on getting ready.

"Fine arsehole." Niall spins onto his stomach grabbing Harry's pillow and shoving it under him. "Gonna mess up your pillow then." He grinds down, hands pushing into the mattress as his cock rubs against the soft material.  
"Oh fuck." It feels so much better then Niall thought. He goes faster, almost forgetting Harry was even in the room as fucks down into the pillow.  
"Holy shit."

"You are just teasing yourself more." Niall looks over at Harry. He isn't looking at Niall, is pretending to be busy picking out what to wear. But his jaw his tensed and he looks unfocused. Also his dick is hard between his legs. Dead give away that one.

"Nah, I'm making myself come actually. You are the one missing out." Niall flops back onto his back, smiling snugly when he sees the wet patch of pre-cum on Harry's pillow. He wraps his hand back around himself and jerks quickly.

"I would be so good for you. Come so quick. You won't be late." He raises his head blue eyes meeting green.

"Let me be good for you." Harry swears then drops the t-shirt he was holding practically leaping onto Niall.

Niall laughs loudly grabbing Harry's waist and flipping them over so he can straddle him.

"Nice and quick baby, come on." Harry taps Niall's bum rocking his hips up as Niall starts to grind down.

"That's it baby come on." Harry grabs his hips helping him to move. Niall looks down, watches his cock rub over Harry's. Pre-cum mixing and making them both wet, making the slide more slick and easy.

"Feels good baby. You gonna come for me?" Harry moves his hand and wraps it around both of them.

"Good boy, such a good boy. Going to be so quick for me. Come on baby." Harry thumb catches Niall's tip and it's all it takes to push him over the edge.

"Fuck yeah, Harry." He spills over Harry's fist, dripping down his wrist and onto his cock and then Harry is coming too covering his stomach and adding to Niall's.

"Oh, oh god. Shit baby." Harry looks down at them, mouth parted.  
"Made a mess. You gonna make me clean it up? Make me late?" Niall shakes his head, crawling down Harry before he had even finished talking.

He licks every last drop up, keep the last few bits in his mouth and kissing it into Harry's.

"Good boy. So good. Going to marry you."

"In a castle."

"Or a slightly smaller venue." Niall hums into the kiss.

"Gotcha. Small castle it is."

"You're such a twat." Harry pushes Niall off him and rolls off the bed landing with an ungraceful thud to the floor.

"You're marrying this twat. You shall be Mr Harold Twat."

"So weird. You always get so weird after coming." Niall laughs into his arm, watching Harry as he hops into a snug pair of boxers.

"I know. I'm taking your last name anyways. Mr Niall cute bum. It works. I have a cute bum." Harry looks at Niall fondly, slipping a purple shirt up his arms. He goes back over to the bed, bending down to kiss Niall's nose shirt still hanging open.

"What are you doing today?" Niall blows air out between his lips.

"Was thinking about checking in with Zayn this morning then taking Landon out to do some more stuff." Harry looks annoyed but Niall counts it as a win the he doesn't scoff. Maybe he will actually learn to like Landon.

"If anything happens, even if it's something really small you call me" Niall nods, holding his hand up with his thumb and index finger close together.

"The tiniest thing and I will be on the phone promise." Harry comes back to Niall fully dressed this time and kisses him in a way that it far to hot and deep and wet for it to be a goodbye kiss.

"You are determined to make me spend the day turned on ain't ya."

"Maybe."

"Hmm be gone you."

"I'm going. Love you a lot."

"Love you too. Have a nice day."

Niall stretches his arms above his head once Harry has closed the door, letting out a groan as his back clicks.

He is halfway off the bed when the bedroom door crashes open again.

"Fuck it, I can be late." Niall screeches as Harry manhandles him back down to the bed, trousers already pushed down to his knees.

Xxxxxx

"You seem happy." Landon is beaming at Niall as he practically bounces next to him, arms swinging as he walks.

"I feel so good today! I've decided to just be happy and be positive. I have some freak following me about and trying to like ruin my life or whatever, but Its not going to work. Zayn's going to be OK and me and Harry are super happy and getting married. Nothing else is important." Niall twirls throwing his arms over Landon's shoulder making them both stumble on the pavement. Landon chuckles, steadying Niall's by wrapping his arm around his waist.

"That's a good attitude to have I guess, why the sudden change?"

"Just stupid ain't it? Letting it get in the way of life and causing tension between me and Harry. It's what they want. I'm not giving them what they want. They can take photos all the photos they desire and try to come between me and my friends. I'm not scared, I know what their game is and it's nothing to worry about." Niall bounds ahead, skip in his step. Landon watches him go eyes narrowed.

Xxxx

"Uncle Niall!" Niall holds his arms out just in time to catch the bundle of glitter and hair clips that's leaps at him.

"Hey pretty girl. Why are you not at school?"

"It's an insect day!" Niall places her down on her feet and she runs off straight away screaming. Zayn is leaning against the wall watching her run towards the playroom. He looks all soft and cosy in some jogging bottoms and a baggy jumper so Niall goes over to him and wiggles into his arms.

"Insect day?" Zayn laughs ruffling Niall's hair.  
"Inset day. Hey Landon."

"Oh, well that makes more sense. How you feeling?" Niall nuzzles into Zayn's neck. He smells like strawberries.

"Not to bad today, just super sleepy. You're affectionate today." Rae comes back into the room holding up her colouring book and pencil case.

"Can you play daddy?" Niall steps back from Zayn as he crouches down to be level with Rae.

"Daddy is just going to talk to uncle Niall for a bit OK. But I promise I will come play a bit later." Rae looks like she is about to cry, lip pouting out and eyes widening.

"I can. If that's alright with you. I don't mind playing." Landon speaks up, stepping forward smiling down at Rae. Zayn just nods standing back up.

"She will have you dressing up as a princess." Landon just shrugs looking completely not bothered.

"I reckon I don't mind being dressed up a little. I'm good with kids promise." Niall can tell Zayn is hesitant about leaving Rae alone with Landon. Niall know Landon is perfectly capable of playing without any trouble. He really was good with kids. Patient and understanding. Rae would love him.

"OK, I guess. Rae you want to play with Landon?" Rae looks up at Landon, nose scrunched up.

"You like unicorns? And mermaids? And dinosaurs?"

"Love em'."

"OK then." Rae holds her hand out for Landon to take and drags him towards the playroom. Landon looks over his shoulder at Niall pretending to look panicked before disappearing.

"Tea?"  
"Of course." Niall gets settled at the large island in the middle of the kitchen. He gets serious kitchen envy when he comes to Matt and Zayn's house.

He could picture Harry in a kitchen like this. Baking his cakes with flour and chocolate in his hair. Naked preferably. Niall loves when he naked bakes.

"You're so rich." Zayn shots Niall a look over his shoulder.   
"My husband is rich. I am technically unemployed." Zayn puts Niall's tea down in front of him then takes a seat resting his chin on his hands.

"Were is little man?"  
"Asleep."  
"Matt's leaving you with the kids again?" Zayn shakes his head, leaning forward to blow on his drink.  
"Nope, he had a work call that he couldn't ignore so he had no choice. Probably still listening in."   
"I'm sorry."

"No it's fine." He rubs at his face, pushing his hair off his forehead.   
"It's the right thing at the moment. I'm still craving and we are still finding drugs around the house. I don't want to be alone when I find them so it's good he is about so much." Niall thinks back to Zayn in his kitchen. How desperate he was for Niall to give him them pills. He was so glad Zayn had Matt. Someone who knew how to deal with this kind of thing. Niall had felt so lost dealing with Zayn, having no idea what was best for him.

"I'm still sorry. If this is all because of me-"

"Hey no. Niall you shouldn't be apologizing to me. I should be thanking you for being there for me. You and Harry were great. Most people would have just thrown the drugs at me and shut me in a room. So thank you." Niall sips his tea, wincing slightly as it burnt at his mouth.

"Nothing would have made me give them to you."   
"I know. Now let's talk about something else. Take my mind off stuff." Niall takes another gulp of his tea.

"Me and Harry are getting married in a castle."

"There is no way you're doing that."

"Yes there is. Just picture Rae and Elliott all dressed up. In a castle."

"It would be cute. Harry will never agree to a castle." Niall pouts. He was so not going to get married in a castle.

"Dad and Lisa will probably have a BBQ soon."

"Anyone tell Bobby it's nearly December?" Niall laughs bringing his leg up and tucking it underneath himself.

"He will just tell us to put coats on and man up. We get Lisa's burgers so we can deal. Also don't forget we have been banned from calling it December." Zayn rolls his eyes sighing.

"I'm not calling it louember. He can get stuffed. His birthday can be one day like the rest of us."

They talk and laugh and joke for the next hour. Matthew coming down to join them after his phone call.

Zayn looks a little brighter then when they first arrived. More alert and a lot happier as he cuddled up with Matt.

"Hey Ni." Niall turns in his seat to face Landon who has just walked in, Rae holding on to his fingers.

"Sorry but do you mind if I head back to the house? Just need to call mum."

"Sure yeah, want me to come with you?" He denies the offer, telling Niall to stay and enjoy himself before saying goodbye to the others and leaving.

"How it going having him in the house?" Zayn questions, getting up from his chair to set a snack up for Rae.

"Fine. It's really nice having him about. Good to know we can still be good friends after everything."

 

"Harry doing alright with it?"

 

"Yes Harry is fine with it. At least he should be, i'm sure he is adult enough to share my attention." Zayn just raises his eyebrow before changing the subject.

"What was up with you yesterday? You were well weird when you came here." Zayn places Rae's snack down in front of her and she picks it up and hops down to place it on the floor. Niall watches her get settled cross legged before eating. Kids are strange. 

"Just had a rough day. Sorted now though."

"Painting helped right?" Rae lets out a sigh, placing her snack back on the plate. 

"Yes, actually. Did you keep it? Are you going to frame it?" 

"It was crap Ni."

"Lying is not nice." Zayn sticks his tongue out,grabbing Niall's dirty mug to put it in the sink with his. Matt's phone beeps and he gets up with an over the top groan going into the living room to deal with it. Rae grabs on to Niall's leg, heaving herself up.

"Daddy."

"Hang on bub." 

"Daddy." Zayn turns to look at Rae giving her a quick smile before turning back to the sink. 

"You not gonna eat that?"

"I don't feel good." Niall places the back of his hand to her forehead like he always see's Zayn do when one of the kids have an upset tummy.

"Shit." She was burning up pretty bad, the back of Niall's hand wet. Rae starts to cry as Zayn walks around the island.

"I'm sick."

"It's OK baby, want to go lay down and then daddy will get some medicine?" Zayn touches Rae head like Niall had just done his face instantly looking worried. 

"She is really hot." Rae lets out another sob, clutching her stomach then throwing up all over Zayn legs and the floor. 

Niall gets up quickly rushing over to Rae. Zayn has leapt back out of instinct to avoid more sick, Niall drops to his knees only just managing to catch Rae as she flops backwards. 

It takes him a few seconds to realize she is having a seizure. 

He drag her away from the chairs, turns her to lay on her side yanking her dress away from her neck. 

"Rae?"

"She's having a seizure, i need you to call for an ambulance." Rae's eyes are closed, her body tensing up and twisting repeatedly on Niall's lap. Niall takes deep breaths, one hand supporting the back of Rae's head the other stroking over her hair. 

He has to stay calm. He knows he has to be the one to stay clam because Zayn is practically screaming into the phone and Matt is dropping down by Niall's side and Niall can feel the panic oozing off him. 

His mum used to have seizures when she was getting treatment, when it was getting bad. He had never had to deal with one but he had to learn about them just in case he was ever on his own. He knew there was not much they could do other then wait for it to pass and for the ambulance to arrive. 

Seizures can be frightening, but most last only a few minutes, stop on their own, and are not life-threatening. 

That's what he had been told. He repeats it in his head, breathing in and out slowly. 

Not life threatening. They are not life threatening. 

They did not have to worry about the seizures, just what had caused it. 

By the time the ambulance arrives Rae's has gone completely still and Zayn is cradling her in his arms kissing at her face and whispering in her ear, Matt curled around her back doing the same. 

Niall vaguely remembers passing her to them, telling to to comfort and reassure her. 

Niall talks to the paramedic. 

No she has not had one before. 

No he does not think she has eaten anything she shouldn't have. 

No she is not allergic to anything. 

She had been fine. She had been completely fine.

Niall stays calm, breathing in and breathing out. Matt and Zayn go into the ambulance, both grabbing Niall into a hug faces soaked with tears as they leave. 

Niall waits until the ambulance is gone then stumbles back into the house to get his phone.

Harry picks up on the third ring.

"Hello love." He is talking quietly so he must be in the classroom. 

"Rae...Rae had a seizure." A sob bursts out of Niall and the he can't stop. He had been so scared. So terrified watching her. She had seemed so small on his lap. His little princess. 

"I'm now coming baby." There is a cry from upstairs and Niall startles dropping his phone. 

"Elliott...I have-" He stops, picks the phone back up. "I have Elliott. I will try and find a contact for Matt's parents." 

"I will be there soon, we will go to the hospital as soon as we can." Niall hangs up wiping at his face and trying to calm himself back down before going to get Elliott out of his bed. 

Harry would be here soon. 

Rae will be OK. 

She will be fine. 

Frightening but not life threatening. 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

By the time Harry and Niall get to the hospital the others are already there. Niall heads straight for Zayn crashing into his arms.

"How is she? What have they said?" Harry is right behind him, rubbing at his shoulders. 

"She is fine. She has been awake for a while now, a bit groggy but acting like herself mostly. They got her to eat and drink so that's good. They just want to do a few tests. Try and work out what started it but they said it could just be her temperature getting to high." She had been hot but Niall had no idea what was to hot for a child. 

"Matt's with her now. Thank you Ni, for like dealing with that so well." Niall pulls him back into another hug. Harry goes to sit with Louis and Liam, taking Liam's hand in his and holding it tightly. River is sat with Macy and Cassie all three huddled around Nolan. 

Everyone stays quite as they wait and Niall has managed to chew his fingers to pieces before Matt comes back with the doctor. 

There is a look on Matt's face that has Niall stomach dropping to his feet. Zayn gets up, arms wrapping around his waist. 

"What is it?" His voice shakes and Niall is so scared of what they are going to say that he cant even imagine how Zayn much be feeling. 

Matt just sighs, closing his eyes and slumping against the wall. The doctor clears his throat. 

"We have found traces of Tramadol in your daughter system, we believe that she may have swallowed a pill. Tramadol is well know for causes seizures in young children but she will be completely fine. Do you have any idea how she could have gotten hold of the pill?" Zayn shakes his head.

"No. No, I don't know." He turns to Matt face screwing up. "I promise. I don't- I don't know." Niall reaches forward pressing his fingers into Zayn wrist. He flinches, looking down at Niall. The doctor starts talking again, giving Matt some papers but Niall just focuses on Zayn. 

When the doctor leaves Niall is up on his feet straight away ready to reassure Zayn. 

"It's going to be fine yeah, they know what it is and we now know she is not sick or anything. She is going to be fine, back to normal by tomorrow i would say." 

"Leave." Niall's head snaps round to Matt. He pushes past Niall, shoving Zayn in the chest sending him stumbling back. 

"Leave!" 

"Matt what are you doing?"

"It's his fault." Niall steps between them holding his hands up.

"No its not. The doctor said it was Tramadol. That's a pain relief right? Maybe someone just dropped one in the house. It's not his fault" Matt pushes Niall out the way again and it has Harry up and out of his seat in a flash. 

"Let's just calm down."

"It was him. He takes it, or at least he did before. Last time you relapsed I found a load on him. You took some didn't you? And you left them around for her to find. You left them where our baby girl could get them!" Zayn flinches back into the wall, tears pouring down his cheeks.

"No! No I didn't. I haven't touched any, I have not been leaving anything around the house. This is not me."

"I need you to leave. Get out! Fucking go!" Niall grabs Zayn and pushes him towards the door Harry and Liam following closely behind. 

"I can't go. I can't leave her."

"You won't. We will just go get some air, let him cool off. He will settle down and he will come say sorry." They get Zayn outside. Liam pats his pockets down until he finds his cigarettes and lighter passing them to Niall to light. Niall does so then places it between Zayn's lips, lighting one for himself with shaking hands. 

"When I find out who is doing this I am going to kill them." Niall looks straight into Zayn's eyes and believes every word.


	22. chapter 22

It was a mistake. It had to be a mistake. Rae was just a child. This person, they were clearly messed up but this had to be a mistake. 

She must have found the tablet and thought it was a sweet. He can't begin to believe this person wanted Rae to find them. 

Maybe they would stop. Now that they have hurt a child by accident. 

It had to have been an accident. If not then Niall dreads to think who they could be dealing with. 

Niall is standing outside. Bare feet and in just a short sleeve shirt. His breath is curling in front of him barely visible in the dark, the sun hours away from rising. 

He wants this person to see him. 

Wants nothing more then for them to be here right now looking right at him. He wants them to come out, to show Niall who they are. He wants to wrap his hands around their neck until they are nothing. 

"Baby." Harry comes outside, their duvet from the bed in his hands. "Baby, you must be so cold." He drape's it over Niall gently leading him back into the house. 

"Come back to bed." He does not think they done this on purpose, but they did it. 

Niall lets Harry tuck him back into bed. Lets him wrap himself around Niall, covering every inch of freezing skin. 

They will slip up eventually. He will find out who they are. 

He will make them pay.

xxx

Harry waits until Niall is in the shower before going into the kitchen where Landon is stood looking down at his phone. 

He grips the back of his neck, smacking his feet into his legs sending him slamming chest first into the floor phone clattering under the table. 

"What the fuck!" Harry pushes his face down, knee digging into his back. 

"You can mess with us all you want you sick little cunt, but if i find out you hurt Rae on purpose I will fucking end you. This sick, fucked up little game of yours is not going to work so i suggest you get you pathetic arse back home. You made the wrong fucking move." Harry gets up, making sure to press his knee down extra hard before releasing him. Landon scrambles back to his feet, backing up to put distance between them. 

"And how is Niall going to feel when I tell him about this? Threatening me, hurting me. For nothing." Harry closes the gap, hand gripping onto Landon's chin as he shoves him back into the wall. 

"You can tell him all you want I don't give a fuck. There is nothing you can do to scare me. At the end of the day I will always have Niall and that will not change. I get to climb into bed with him each night. I get to hold him, kiss him, fuck him. I get to love him. You will never have that no matter what you do. Even if you did manage to break us apart you will still never have him the way you want. So you fucking come at me with whatever you want to you fuck. I will take you down each time." Landon laughs hands wrapping around Harry wrist to push his hand away.

"We will see about that wont we. I think you will find that I will get exactly what I want. I will bury myself so deep into him that he wont even remember your name." Harry's arm rears back, fist clenching. Landon tilts his head back, eyes gleaming, 

"That's it. You give me a good punch. See how that works for you." Harry drops his arm. If he hits him once he knows he wont stop. He grips Landon tighter,slamming his back into the wall again before letting him go and walking away. 

Xxxxx

His entrance into Louis classroom is far too loud and more then half the room spins round to look at him. Harry pulls a chair out the metal legs scrapping loudly on the wooden floor gaining the attention of a few more students. Harry sits down dragging himself towards the table the legs scrapping again.

He hears Louis let out a sigh but he doesn't look up from his desk.

"Er, Mr Tomlinson your friend is here."

"Well yes thank you Simon I am very well aware that Mr styles just came into the room as is the rest of the building I'm sure." Harry only looks a little sheepish when Louis looks up at him.

"You can all leave early." Nobody's moves, some people still looking over to Harry. Louis rubs at his eyes head dropping down.

"Well as you all seem so keen to stay how about we add another hour on to the lesson." Before he has even finished talking the room fills with movement, everyone scrambling to get up and leave.

Louis waits until the last student has left, door slamming shut behind them, then he gets up from his desk and jogs up to Harry.

"There are two options." He starts as soon as Louis has settled down next to him. "It was an accident. Landon or maybe someone who is working with him just left them and didn't know Rae could get them. She thought it was a sweet so swallowed it." Louis nods, clicking his tongue against the roof of his mouth.

"Or he gave them straight to her. Do we have any reason to believe he would? It seems a bit too much to me" Harry doesn't think Landon needs much of a reason to be a fucking dickhead.

"He asked Niall to go to Italy with him." Louis let's out a laugh leaning forward into the desk looking at Harry in disbelief.

"The little fucking sneak. He said no right?"

"He was going to say yes, changed his mind after telling me."

"And then Rae was drugged." Harry held his hands out and shrugs.

"You still think it seeks like too much?" Louis shakes his head.

"No. He is teaching him a lesson. He is pissed Niall said no to him. Problem is Niall is so far up his arse that he can't take a step back and see what's going on. We need to get your boy seeing some sense Harry. Landon is a basket case. He is not safe."

Actually, Harry thinks Niall is the safest he has ever been. Landon is obsessed and wants nothing more then Niall to himself. He will hurt others who get in the way. He wouldn't do a single thing to harm Niall.

"Harry. What if Landon pushes this? Makes a move for Niall and does not take no for an answer"

"What do I do? I have told Niall I think it's him and he does not believe me. He thinks Landon is this amazing person and he is just so thankful that they are friends after everything that happened and nothing else matters. If I keep trying to convince him then I might as well buy him a plane ticket and pack his bag for him." Louis looks around the room, eyes narrowed as he thinks.

They had to be careful with this. They make the wrong move and piss Landon off then someone gets hurt. They piss Niall off and he will leave.

The only way was for Niall to find out for himself.

"What if we push his buttons a bit. If we piss him off he might act without thinking, make a mistake that even Niall can't ignore." Harry shakes his head. It's an idea but it's not the right one. 

"It's just risking someone getting hurt along the way. We have the kids to think about. We now know he is not above bringing them into this." It felt like there would be nothing they could do other then hope Niall opens his eyes to what was going on soon.

Harry had no idea how Niall can't see what is happening right in front of him.

Landon has been the centre of nearly everything that has happen.

He arrived days after it started.

He was at the house when the photos were put up.

He was in the same room when Zayn got drugged.

He was in the house to put condoms in Harry's bag.

He was alone with Rae moments before she got sick.

How can he need get what is happening?

How the hell has Harry found himself in a place where he knows all this but can't get Niall to believe him.

"You need to keep Niall on side, that's the most important thing. You and him need to be in the best place possible. It's the easiest way to keep him and Landon at a distance. Don't argue with him. Spoil him, be with him every second you can. Don't do anything to let Landon wiggle his way in more then he has." That's something Harry can do. Landon will try to come between them but they had agreed to talk about anything they seems odd. Landon can try and come up with some plan, Harry felt pretty confident Niall won't fall for any.

He just had to not argue with him in the meantime.   
Just agree with whatever Niall says.

That should be easy.

"Play him at his own game. He wants Niall but you want him a lot more."

"Why is he doing this now? Niall left Italy nearly five years ago. Why has it taking that long for Landon to come here and do this?"

"God knows how the kid's mind works. Maybe he tried to move on but nobody could replace Niall so he snapped. He was mad for him right, like full on madly in love with him it seems. It's turned him fucking crazy."

"Can you imagine what that is like. Being that in love with someone that you're willing to let them pretend you're someone else. Niall was the most important thing to him "

"Yeah well he needs to learn to take rejection a little better. We have all had shitty relationships but we haven't gone after people because of it." Louis looks at his watch then glances at his classroom door.

"My next lot will be arriving soon." Louis stands up, hand resting on Harry's shoulder.   
"Come to the pub tonight. Let's get some alcohol in the boy and see what happens. You focus on Niall and I will push Landon a little."

"No Lou, I don't want you pissing him off. You've been left out of this so far." Louis points his finger at Harry, stern look on his face.

"He has been messing with you and put my little queen in hospital. I have been a part of this from the start. He don't know enough about me anyway and I will make sure not to mention anything he can mess with. If all we can do is wait for Niall to grow a brain then at least we can attempt to push things along a little quicker." Harry nods once then gets up to hug Louis.

"Promise me after this you and Niall are just going to get married and have a normal life for a really long time." Harry chuckles, kissing at Louis shoulder.

"I plan to. Might take him out of this bloody city. Live in the country side with loads of animals and kids." Louis makes a sound of agreement stepping back but keeping his hands on Harry.

"That sounds peaceful. Maybe me and Cassie will join you."

God, that does sound peaceful. Why had he never thought to just up and move somewhere were it can be just them two and their family. Somewhere fresh where it's all happy memories. Not death and heart break and fear.

Harry slips out of the classroom just as Louis next class come in, Louis teacher voice booming around the room.

Xxxxxx

Harry and Niall arrive at Matthew and Zayn's house an hour later to take over looking after Elliott. Niall stops by the door to talk to Matt's parents while Harry picks Elliott up and holds him tight, faces pressed together. 

He hates to admit it but he is so glad that he and Niall do not have a child of their own at the moment. Harry was already stressed enough with worrying about what was going to happen next and if it would hurt Niall or Liam. Having a baby to also worry about would be too much for them all.

He just really hopes it would all be sorted out before someone looked at their file and chose them. 

He wants a baby with Niall so badly that he ached for it, but he dreads to think how Landon would react if Niall and Harry suddenly had something else to bring them even closer together, make them stronger. 

"It's been a weird couple of days hey mate." Elliott babbles back a load of nonsense with a few words thrown in that Harry understood. 

"Guess things still seem pretty normal to you. That must be nice." He puts Elliott down as he starts to wiggle watching him as he heads towards his toy box on unsteady feet, tipping it over and sending a mountain of cars spilling over the carpet. 

Niall comes into the room looking down at the mess on the floor before tucking himself into Harry's side. Harry was pretty sure he had not slept a wink last night and was looking exhausted because of it. He had been so worried when he found him standing outside in the cold early this morning and had not stopped worrying since. 

"Matt's spoke to his parents this morning, they should be heading home about now."

"OK. That's good." Niall just sighs, stepping back from Harry and dropping to the floor to push some cars around with Elliott. 

"Do you think we should go to the police now? It's gone too far right?" 

"What do you want to do?" Niall shrugs laying his head down on the carpet, turned to the side to face Harry.

"Dunno, maybe we should leave it up to Matt and Zayn. The police might want to talk to Rae, to find out about when she took this tablet and stuff. Might upset her." 

Harry was not sure how he felt about getting the police involved. 

He was 99 per cent sure this was Landon. Was just as sure that someone else was involved in helping him. Landon had not admitted to doing anything but he had pretty much told Harry to his face that he was here to get Niall back. If they went to the police he would know about it and he might panic. He didn't want to do anything to push Landon into going after what he wanted even if Niall said no. 

"Let's just work it out as we go along yeah. If it involve Rae then its not really up to us what happens." 

Matt and Zayn arrive home and hour and a half later, Rae fast asleep in Matts arms. Niall hops up and goes up the stairs ahead of Matt to help him settle Rae into bed. Zayn drops her rucksack and makes a beeline for Harry. Harry opens his arms up and pulls Zayn in, hugging him to his chest. 

"How you doing?" 

"Fine. Fucking tired and angry. Rae is back to her normal self, just really sleepy."

Harry runs his hand in a soothing circle on Zayn's back, kissing the side of his head. 

"Does she understand what happened?" 

"Think so. She won't say where she found the tablet. I told her she is not in trouble but she looks terrified when we ask her so we are just leaving it for now." Harry eyes dart over to the playroom door. Niall had said that was were Landon and Rae had been playing. Away from everyone, alone with Rae. Had he given it to her then told her something bad would happen if she told? Or had she really just found it laying around and was worried about being told off by an adult? 

Could he really do something that evil just as an attempt to get Niall to leave with him? Or even just to punish him for saying no. 

"Social services are coming to see us." Harry swallows around a lump in his throat and holds Zayn a little tighter. 

"They wont take her away. They just have to check in."

"They know i'm an addict. We barely got her Haz, and now we will have to tell them that there are drugs around the house and when I tell them that some fucking dick is planting them they will definitely think I'm back on drugs."

 

"They wont take her away. They will see that she is loved and safe and happy. They won't just rip a five year old out of her home. It's probably just something they have to do after a child's been admitted to hospital just to check that everyone is OK."Zayn moves back looking down at Elliott who is so lost in his own little word that he has not even noticed his Dad standing in the room. 

"They got in contact so fast. I don't think that's a good thing. If they take her away she is going to be so frightened. We are all she knows, she was too young to remember even having a life without us in it. We are her Dads. She will be so, so scared." Harry cups Zayn's face, turning him to look back towards him. 

"She won't be taken away. They will just want to know what happened, maybe talk to Rae a little. There is so much love in this house and they will see and feel that as soon as they step inside. It's all going to be fine." Zayn places his hands around Harry's a small smile on his face. 

"OK. Your probably right. I'm just overtired and upset about everything. Maybe if I get some sleep things wont seem so bad." Matt and Niall come back down the stairs, the sound of their footsteps getting Elliott's attention. Matt takes a moment to hug and say another thank you to Niall. He looks worse then Zayn, eyes red and watering as they say goodbye and leave them to be alone and get settled.

Niall is silent on the drive home, leaning against the car door as he looks out the window. Harry try's to stay focused on the road but he cant help but keep looking at him to check that he is alright. He was blaming himself for what happened with Rae and that was really unfair. He did not ask for all this to start happening. 

Niall still has not spoken by the time they get back into the house. 

There is a note from Landon letting them know he had gone out by himself to see some more sights, wanting to give them all some space for the day. 

Harry frowns down at the note. He thought for sure Landon would use all this as an excuse to get closer to Niall. Be a comfort for him. Maybe he felt it was best to leave after Harry lost it with him this morning. Maybe next time he should punch him and he will just leave altogether. 

Or he was planning something even bigger. Harry screws the note up, ignoring that thought and instead goes upstairs to run himself and Niall a bath. If Landon was leaving them alone he was going to enjoy it and hopefully make Niall feel a little better. 

"What you up to?" Harry looks up at Niall as he comes into the bathroom, leaning on the door frame. 

"Thought we could just relax a little. Cuddle and chat. Or just be quite together, either one." Niall walks into the room more until he reaches Harry. 

"That's nice." Harry puts his hands on Niall's hips pushing his fingers under his top to rub over the skin on his stomach. Niall tilts his head back and puckers his lips so Harry leans down to close the gap between them. Their lips move smoothly, taking their time to feel and taste each others mouths as steam from the bath swirls around them. Niall whimpers pressing himself into Harry more, parting his lips for Harry. 

Harry does not think he will ever grow bored of kissing Niall. Each kiss was still like the first, right here in this room. A kiss that was supposed to be innocent, but had ended up being so electric that Harry had wanted to devour him, was sure that if Niall had not been an innocent teen he would have fucked him right at that moment against the mirror. 

"You ever think about our first kiss?" He asks, lips moving against Niall's as he speaks. Niall's lips curl up into a smile making Harry kiss at his teeth.

"Pretty much every time I come into this room. One of the hottest moments ever. So glad you decided to kiss me." Niall manages to control his smiling enough for Harry to kiss him properly again, hands moving around to the dip in his back.

"I was a little scared. Thought I done pretty well to keep away from you for that long, you were a tease. All kiss me Harry, touch me Harry I am all young and need corrupting Harry." Niall swats him on the bum, pushing him away.

"Was not like that. Idiot." It was most definitely like that. Niall can deny that one all he likes. Although Harry is pretty sure he is more then grateful that Niall was too much of a tease to resist. It worked out well for him. 

"Matt seemed pretty upset didn't he. He said that social services are coming over. Think it's got him really scared." Harry turns the taps off helping Niall get out of his clothes before removing his own. 

"Yeah Zayn said but I think it will be fine. They have to check on these things I imagine and they have never had a problem before. Its such a good home for her and they will see that." Harry gets in the bath first, sitting right back so Niall can climb in and sit between his legs back resting against his chest. 

"I hope so. It will be my fault if they lose her." 

"It wont baby." Harry picks up the sponge getting it wet and soapy. "Nothing that is happening is your fault. Matt and Zayn don't think so and nobody else does either."

"I asked if he was going to talk to the police, or if social services will want to but he don't think they will. He thinks it will just make things worse." Harry leans down to kiss around Niall ear as he rinses soap off his chest.

"I'm sure he knows whats best."

"I'v been trying to think of anyone I have pissed off but there is nobody. Not that I know of anyway. I just want to know who it is." Harry squeezes the water out of the sponge and a part of his wishes he could do the same to Niall. Just squeeze him until he understands what going on right in front of him.

"We will work it out eventually and it will stop." 

"What if it doesn't? What if it just get's worse and this person does not stop at just hurting us? I can't lose anyone Harry. I can't lose you." Harry holds on to him, hands gripping at his sides and legs wrapping around his waist.

"You won't baby boy. Your not going to lose anyone i will make sure of that." Niall turns his head to the side, nose shoved just above Harry's nipple.

"You don't know that. How could you even stop it. They can do what the want." 

"No, they just think they can. We just have to think really hard love and stick together and we will beat them." The only person who was going to lose anything was Landon. Harry would do anything to make sure that happens. 

He just needs to make one mistake and Harry could have him and he was going to enjoy every second of making him pay for everything he had done.


	23. Chapter 23

"Shots!" Cassie comes over to their tablet placing down a tray of shots. Louis rubs his hands together before handing them out so they all had two each. 

"I feel bad being here drinking while Matt and Zayn are so stressed." Niall whispers to Harry, tucked tightly against his side. Landon is sitting to his left, leg pressed into his looking down at the small glass in front of him. 

"Don't love. You spoke to them before we came out. They are fine and they told you to have some fun." Niall sighs. Taking a shot glass in each hand before downing them both quickly, grimacing at the strong taste. 

Cassie and Louis both cheered loudly before doing there own Harry and Landon following after. 

"Christ! What is that?" Landon splutters using the back of his wrist to wipe at his mouth. Louis laughs loudly. 

"You're drinking with the grown ups tonight mate. We don't brace ourselves in London!" Niall laughs at the look on Landon's face bumping his knee into his.

"Don't worry Lou he can keep up! He used to drink everyone under the table at the restaurant then went straight back to cooking like he had been sipping on tap water." Landon laughs, smile splitting his face as he looks down at Niall. 

"Unlike Niall here who used to pass out under the counter by lunch time. Obviously the Irish don't know how to drink." Niall gasps, faking offence slapping Landon across the shoulder. 

"Whatever! It's just cause it was so damn hot all the time and I probably hadn't eaten anything. I could keep up most days." 

"Yeah course. Nearly burnt your eyebrows off once because you insisted you had been keeping up just fine." Niall snorts covering Landon's mouth with his hand. 

"Hey! What happened it Italy stays in Italy. I drink like a man!" Landon removes Niall's hands looking at him fondly. 

"Oh the stories I could tell." Louis clears his throat leaning back in his chair, eyes rolling. 

"Yes stories. Tell us some stories about you Landon. You have been here what...." Louis rolls his wrist in the air "Too long anyways and yet I feel like I hardly know you. Strange that." Harry and Cassie come back over drinks being passed around. Landon thanks them tucking is glass to his chest. 

"You know some stuff. Not much to me really." Louis hums eyes narrowed before raising his glass to to his lips and downing more then half. Niall only just resist the urge to tell him to slow down. 

"How much longer to you think you will be here then? Or do you plan on waiting till these two get married and run in screaming I object." Cassie lets out a bark of laughter, hand coming up to slap over her mouth as soon as she realises what she done.  Niall groans, shaking his head.

"Jesus Lou, shut the fuck up." Landon shuffles next to him, knees knocking as he gulps down his drink purposefully making sure to drink more then Louis managed to. 

"Don't know how long I plan on staying mate, maybe until you stop being a dickhead." Niall thinks this is the perfect time to have his beer. Then maybe more shots. There should definitely be more alcohol on this table. 

Louis leans his elbows on the table, picking up his soggy beer mat and throwing it towards Landon who watches it land in front of him.

"Guess we are never getting rid of you then. Hobbies?" Landon glances at Niall, hand combing through his hair making it all fall down in front of his eyes. 

"Photography." Louis leans back again beaming across the table hands raised in the air.

"Well isn't that interesting. Photography! He likes to take pictures. Funny that, I know of someone who has been really enjoying taking some pictures at the moment. Bit of a creep like you."

"Louis." Niall shots him a warning look. He should have know Louis only asked them all out tonight to act like this. And he was stupid enough to think they might actually start trying to get along with Landon. If only to be nice to Niall. 

"Maybe we should go?" Landon shakes his head, sitting back in his chair.

"Nah i'm fine." Niall chews nervously on his lip looking next to him at Harry who was looking completely unbothered by the atmosphere. If things were this tense already he dreads to think what it will be like the more they all drink. 

Landon and Louis both drink the rest of theirs beers, eyes never leaving each other. 

xxxx

"So Landon, mate. What do you think about poor Rae?" Louis asks as Cassie puts down more drinks on their table before rushing off to help the two boys behind the bar. 

"I think it's horrendous. I'm glad she is going to be OK, she is the sweetest kid." Louis nods, chin resting in his hand. 

"She really is. We all love her a lot. You were with her before right? Playing. Did she seem off to you?" 

"she seemed fine."

"you didn't notice her with anything like a tablet." Niall picks up his beer matt and starts tearing at it. Louis was really pissing him off. He had no idea how Landon was managing to still look so cool. 

"If I did then I would have taking it off her, explained to her about how she shouldn't eat things without checking and then I would have told her dad's."

"Of course you would." Louis shushes Niall. 

"Just seem odd mate. That it happened just after you were alone with her. You left didn't you?" Niall sees Landon's face twitch, like he is having to really try and keep his anger back. 

"I left to go talk to my mum. We have scheduled phone calls, that was just a coincidence. I wish I had been there so I could have helped." Louis leans back in his chair.

"right, or course. It's just, it's not the only thing that has happened around you is it?" Landon doesn't answer. Niall picks up two shots and downs them on after the other. 

Xxxxxx

"Holy shit Landon is not gay!" Niall pulls away from Harry's lip with a wet smack, a string of spit keeping them connected. 

"Why would you presume he is?" Niall slurs. The string breaks making Harry giggle which makes Niall giggle because Harry is cute. 

"I dunno. but he is not gay. A prick but not gay." Niall looks over Harry's shoulder to see what had got Louis all riled up. 

When they were all downing their sixth shots a group of hens came in. All wearing slutty wedding dresses and holding blow up dicks. They had all been drunk enough to find this hilarious and had striked up some weird friendship with them.  Or as Harry was calling it a 'drunkship'.

Landon had been dragged away by them about the same time that Niall had planted himself in Harry's lap so he could kiss his face and maybe try to get him turned on enough to give him a blowie in the bogs. 

His plan had been going well if the small little whimpers and the hardness against Niall's leg was anything to go by, but now Niall was watching a very,very drunk Landon with a very, very drunk slutty wedding dressed girl practically dry hump against the bar. 

It's weird. But it should not be. Niall is very aware it should not be weird at all considering he is doing the same thing with his fiance. It does feel weird though. Watching Landon kiss some girl. 

Harry tugs him back in, smashing their lips back together and its enough to make Niall forget what he was even annoyed about. Was he even annoyed? Harry kisses good so that is what he should focus on. 

His eyes slowly open again and he frowns his kiss turning sloppy making Harry pull away and move down his neck instead. 

Landon's hand is on her waist making her dress bunch up and show of the bottom of her knickers. Niall's eyes flick to their lips. He knows how Landon is kissing her. Soft and gentle. Make her want more. Make her want it harder and dirtier. He had told Niall once that was how he got most people into bed with him. Niall thought it was ridiculous at the time. Until Landon showed him how well it worked and had Niall a panting mess in just minutes begging for more.

"Baby. Baby whoa up yeah?" Harry gently rest his hands on Niall's hips and its not until then that Niall realised he has been rutting against Harry a little frantically.  

"Want me to take you home?" Niall looks back to Landon and is saying no before he even think about it. 

"OK. I can keep kissing you if you can stay calm." Its meant to be a joke, and Niall should laugh but he is too busy looking back at Landon. 

Why is this bothering him so much?

Harry goes back to kissing his neck, tugging his top down a little to get better access. 

Niall sighs, eyes fluttering and hips bucking a little and then Landon is looking right back at him. He is still kissing the girl, all slow lips and gentle touches up her side and Niall can see how she is getting desperate for more. Tugging at his shirt and pulling him closer, tilting her head more. 

He can remember that too. Tugging and ripping and pulling. He shakes his head of the thoughts and brings Harry head back so their lips meet again. 

It shouldn't be weird to Niall that Landon is kissing someone. He has probably kissed a load of people since they split up. Maybe he just was not expecting tonight to be a night he hooks up with someone. Landon had spent most the night dependent on Niall because of Louis digs and just generally not being familiar with his surroundings. It was cool that he had felt comfortable enough to go off and chat up someone. 

Niall's eyes still drift back to him.   
He had travelling up her back bringing flashes of Landon's hand on him. 

She tugs at his bottom lip and Niall shivers a little pressing into Harry more. 

Landon is still watching him as he cups her face, thumb running under her chin. 

Niall whimpers, legs dropping a little as he leans forward pushing his erection into Harry's leg more, getting more of the friction he needed. Harry tucks his face into the side of Niall's neck, using his grip on him to keeps him slow but at the same time press him down harder. 

"Keep it slow baby, nobody will know. You gonna come for me with all these people around?" Niall gasps, hands tugging at Harry's hair. 

He could. 

He thinks he is. 

Jesus.

Niall looks around him, can see that nobody is paying attention to him and Lou and Cass are probably so used to Niall and Harry to even care. His eyes settle back on Landon. 

"Come on. Come for me." Landon finally stops kissing her, standing up straighter eyes widening slightly as Niall judders, yanks on Harry hair hard and starts coming, eyes never leaving Landon's. 

He groans, lips pressed to Harry's ear as he spills into his boxers, legs tightening around Harry. 

"fuck, Ni. So hot baby." Niall takes a while to settle back down, Harry lazily kissing around his face and mumbling in his ear about how sexy he is. How dirty. 

He gets up off Harry's lap stumbling to the side as he tries to get his balance. Harry holds his hands out but Niall knocks them away as he makes his way to the toilet. 

He slams into Landon as he passes which makes him fall back a little hands dropping from the girls waist. Niall has a sudden moment of panic when he realises he done that on purpose. 

God he was drunk. He does weird shit when he is drunk. 

He practically falls into the toilet grabbing hold of the sink to keep himself up. Landon is right behind him, pushing the door shut as he makes his way towards Niall. 

He crowds against him and they both stumble back. Niall's back hits the door of the cubical sending it slamming into the wall. The back of his legs hit the toilet his arms flying out to grab at Landon to stop himself from falling backwards into it. 

"You couldn't stop watching." His voice is so slurred Niall can barely hear him but then again his heart his pounding so fast he thinks it could also be that. 

"What."

"You couldn't take your eyes off me." Niall shakes his head and it takes a few seconds for the room to stop spinning afterwards.

"Looking at me. Is that what made you come?"

"Didn't. Harry." Niall poked him in the chest. "Harry always makes me come. Did you make her come?" Niall frowns because why should he care. Landon stares at him for a bit then licks his lips.

"No."

"You were doing the thing. You want to fuck her."

"Is that a problem? I could go home with her, give you and Harry some space."

"No."

"No?" 

"Don't...don't fuck her."

"Can I fuck you?"

"No."

"What can I do Niall?" Niall lets out a frustrated groan. 

"What were you thinking about? When you were watching me."

"Nothing. Just remembering." 

"Remembering? You remember me doing that to you baby. I got you so desperate didn't I? You practically cried when I finally let you have it. Pinned you to the bed, held you down so all you could do was take everything I gave you. You want that again? We could...we could sneak off to find somewhere. I could fuck you all night and it would be our little secret." Niall pushes at his chest and thank to Landon being just as drunk as he is he actually moves back. 

"No. Why are you saying that, no." Niall shoves past him, wobbling as he walks. 

"Come on Ni." Landon pulls on his arm making him stumble backwards into his chest. 

"You know it would be good. Me and you were always good." Niall gets his arm out of his grip spinning round, hand slapping across Landon's cheek. 

"Fuck you! Why did you have to say shit. I don't want you like that. I only want Harry so don't you dare say shit like that again. Don't ruin everything." Landon holds his cheek looking away from Niall. 

"Your drunk, we are all drunk. Your just had too much." Niall leaves the toilet going straight back to their table were Harry is now slumped over in his chair and Louis is balancing a glass on his head. 

"I want to go home." Harry sits up looking daze as Niall starts grabbing their coats. 

"Everything OK?" Niall just nods before saying bye to Cassie and Louis. 

They leave the pub just as Landon is coming out. 

They end up getting a taxi together. Niall turning away from Landon as Harry snuggles into him. 

Landon goes straight to his room, leaning against the wall for support as he goes. 

Niall grabs Harry's hand stopping him from heading towards the kitchen, most likely to down some water, and tugs him to the stairs. 

"Want you to fuck me." Harry nods, holding his hand to his head.

"I can so do that, officer Styles reporting for duty Sir, baby, hunny, hunk." 

"You sure your up for it?" Harry gives him a thumbs up then they are both running up the stairs laughing and tripping over each other. 

Niall throws himself onto the bed starting to work his jeans down his legs while Harry is yanking his jumper off. 

Once they are both naked Harry climbs onto the bed hovering over Niall. 

"Hi." Niall smiles tapping Harry's cheeks.

"Hello." 

"I'm not too sure my dick is going to listen to me when I have drank alcohol." Niall snorts, reaching down to cup Harry's still soft dick.

"Poor baby." Harry judders, mouthing at Niall's shoulders and neck and Niall strokes him softly until he is hard in his hand.

"There we go." Niall lets go off him to reach over to the bedside table so he can get the lube out, Harry still mouthing wetly at him. 

It takes a few goes for Niall to successfully get the lube over his own fingers and by the time he has managed it there is more lube over his stomach then anywhere else but he can deal. He opens himself up and its sloppy and not well done but he knows he can take Harry without much prep so he just slicks up Harry and throws the bottle to the floor, spreading his legs so Harry can lower himself down and line himself up.

"God baby." Niall grips onto the bed as Harry pushes in, enjoying the burn and stretch as the head of his cock slips inside. 

"You good?" Niall nods untangling his hands from the sheet so he can spread them over Harry;s instead.

"Yeah, just fuck me." Harry moves Niall's legs a little and positions himself better before pulling most of the way out until the head of his cock was just teasing at Niall's holes which has Niall keening and his toes curling. 

After that its all sloppy but hard thrusts that have Niall crying out and his body twisting up from the bed as he claws at Harry back. His own hips rock down to meet Harry's making him go deeper into him, his prostate being brush over each time. 

"Oh god. Oh god, harry. Fuck." Harry grabs one of Niall legs, hooking it over his shoulder. It changes the position slightly and Niall has to grab the base of his dick to stop himself from coming already. 

Each drag of Harry cock inside him sends another wave of hot pleasure through Niall and he is not sure if its the angle or the fact that he is drunk but he feels like he could cry with how good Harry is fucking him. 

"Feel so fucking good around me, fucking perfect arse for me to fuck baby." Niall pulls him down closer until their lips are brushing and he can swallow each of Harry's moans and feel his breath over his face. 

"I love you."

"Love you too. fucking love you so much." Harry leans back up, hands either side of Niall head, looking down to were he is fucking into Niall. 

"Look at you." He changes to slow thrust, hand moving to grip Niall's waist as he slams into him and holds it for a second then drawing back out. Niall whimpers, leg falling from Harry side as he spreads them more. Harry keeps with the slow movements watching as Niall falls apart, tears falling. Niall can't work out of its the best feeling ever or the worse, to have Harry moving to slowly yet to hard. Harry strokes his thumb over Niall's lip tugging it out slightly.

"God, I wish you were a girl." Niall goes lose around him, face screwing up before he pushes Harry away making him slip out.  

"Baby?"

 

"What the fuck Harry." Harry sits back, confused as Niall gets off the bed grabbing clothes up from the floor. 

"What? Niall."

"You wish I was a fucking girl?" Harry fish mouths for a second, head shaking.

"No baby. It came out wrong. Shit, I did not mean it like that." Niall already has clothes on and is out of the room before Harry can even get off the bed. 

Niall is shaking as he shoves his shoes on, wiping at his face.

"Niall, please don't be angry." Harry is coming down the stairs, boxers on and t shirt in his hand. "I did not mean it how you think."

"Then how did you mean it?" Niall yanks a coat down, notices that its Harry's so throws it to the floor to grab another. 

"I meant," Harry moves closer lowering his voice. "I meant like, I wish I could get you pregnant and give you what you want. I just, I'm drunk and it came out wrong i'm sorry please come back to bed." 

"You know how i feel about that!" Niall spins round to face Harry, finger jabbing into his chest. "You know how i struggle with it! That you could have been with a girl, you could have had it all. You can't just...fuck Harry you can't just say shit like that because you can't fucking get me pregnant you arsehole!" 

"I know bu-"

"No fuck off. It's not like I don't feel guilty enough that I took that away from you without you shoving it in my face."

"I'm not shoving it in your face!"

"Well it felt like it!" 

"Niall what the hell! You don't need to feel guilty and you have not taken anything from me."

"Yes I have! You like girls, you could have been with a girl and had babies and all that shit like normal people." Harry scoffs, t shirt dropping to the floor.

"We are normal."

"You know what I mean. You have that option."

"I don't want that option. I want to adopt, with you."

"Then why do you say stuff like that. Like you want to get me pregnant, or you wish I was a girl and you stroke my fucking belly all the time Harry." Harry looks lost and Niall knows he does not get why it bothers him so much. 

"You know what just leave it." Niall unlocks the door turning his back to Harry.

"You're really going to leave? Over something as silly as this?"

"Its not silly to me. That fact that you don't understand that is a really big problem Harry."

"Niall please." He moves towards Niall as he steps out the door. "Don't go. We are both drunk and we can talk about this in the morning, just stay so I can make it up to you and then in the morning we can sit down and talk about this more. I do understand and i'm so sorry for saying that when it's something you feel so sensitive about." Niall shakes his head starting to close the door. He feels jittery and now its been said Niall wont be able to unhear it. 

For the first time ever Niall really does not want to be with Harry.

"Just go to work tomorrow. Don't be here when I get back please."

"Niall it's late." Harry rushes forward looking panicked. "It might not be safe, please just stay here." Niall slams the door shut quickly, tugging his coat on as he walks down the driveway. 

The whole walk all he hears is 'I wish you were a girl' on repeat getting louder and louder. By the time he gets to Liam's and let's himself in he is sobbing. 

He felt like there would always be this one thing about him that was not good enough for Harry. 

It had always been there since they decided they wanted kids together. This little nagging thought in the back of his head that he was making Harry miss out.

He knew the alcohol was making his emotions worse. That if he was sober maybe he would have dealt with it better or maybe Harry would have had better control over his words. 

But they were drunk. And that's when the truth comes out. 

And Harry's truth is that he wishes Niall was something he is not. 

Drunk or not, he must have meant it. 

Niall has no idea how he is supposed to deal with that. 


	24. Chapter 24

Harry does not go to bed until Liam has sent him a text to say they found Niall on his sofa. Even then he only gets about two hours of sleep before his alarm wakes him up for work. He wants nothing more then to stay in bed and get lost in his hangover until Niall comes home. Niall was quite clear on wanting Harry gone when he gets back so he drags his arse out of bed and gets into the shower hoping it will lift some of the pressure from his head. 

It doesn't. 

He makes himself a black coffee once he is dressed and downstairs and decides that he can't quite stomach eating food. 

God. He was thirty five. Why the hell was he still getting this drunk and fucking up. 

He so badly wished Niall was not so fragile when it came to him and his sexuality. It was never a problem before they wanted kids, it should still not be a problem. Why cant he understand that yes, Harry could have been with a woman and done this the so called 'normal' way, but it's not what he wants. He wants to raise his next child with Niall. He wants a family with Niall by his side. Not some woman just because it might be easier and quicker. 

He loved Niall so much. That should be enough for Niall to stop worrying  that he was making Harry miss out, or regret being with him. 

"Well you certainly messed up huh?" Harry closes his eyes, placing his mug down on the table This prick really needed to get out of his house.

Harry ignores Landon as he flicks the kettle on, leaning against the worktop with a smirk on his face. 

"You know you weren't exactly quite. Your little slip up, not the best was it? You think you will be able to come back from that one?" Harry does not answer, just keeps his eyes on the table and keeps his face blank. Of course the fucking creep had been listening. Probably had bloody cameras set up in their bedroom. 

"You know. When I first got here I thought I might be wasting my time. Trying to get between the supposedly perfect couple. But I thought, might as well give it a go, and if it don't work out then no worries because I can still see Niall for a bit and really piss you off in the meantime." Landon grabs a mug from the cupboard and places it down, each sounds going off like a bullet in Harry's head. 

"You're not that perfect though. Shocker that." He drags the sugar pot across the counter. Harry sighs, digging the palm of his hand into his eyes. 

"I think i'm pretty close ya know, to getting what I really want. You are being such a massive help along the way. So thanks for that." Harry's hands curl up, teeth gritted.

"Like last night for example. It really unsettled him seeing me with that girl, whatever her name was, not important. Could not stop looking over at me, even while you were making him come he was still looking at me. Again thanks for that, been a while since I got to see that look on his face." Harry drops his hands, knocking his mug and spilling some on the table. 

"He was proper against me going back to hers too. Told me not to, in the toilet right after he came in his pants. Asked me not to go home with her. Told me he was remembering all this stuff, that watching me with her had made him remember. So just think, while he was humping your leg like some dog he was thinking of all those times with me. The way I touched him, the way I kissed him. Maybe even the way I fucked him." Landon sits across from Harry, tea placed in front of him.

"S'good init. Now all I have to do is sit back and wait for you to no doubt fuck up again while he has that all stuck in his head. How well i took care of him. How I know every inch of his body and what to do with it. I know where he likes to be kissed, where to bite . Does he still have a thing about that area, you know that he likes you to blow on just a little." Harry gets up chair clattering to the floor. 

"Oh so he does? I discovered that you know. Made him go fucking wild the first time I done it. Had him coming all over himself. He looks so good don't he? When he comes. The way he clings on to you that little tighter, that little whimper he makes. God, cant wait to get all that again." Landon gets up, walking up behind Harry and leaning around him to dump his tea down the sink.

"Because I will get it back. While your twiddling your thumbs trying to work out the best way to get rid of me or make Niall see me for who I really am, or while you just keep pissing him of again and again I will be getting him back. He is not yours to keep Harry, you stole him from me and I always take back what is mine. Your tea bags are shit by the way, have a nice day at work." 

Harry picks up Landon's used mug, spins and throws it at the wall. 

He can hear Landon laughing.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

Niall wakes up to the smell of bacon and coffee.

When he finally manages to force his eyes open Liam is standing over him munching on a sandwich.

Niall groans covering his eyes with his hands.

"I'm dead."

"Not quite. You do look it though." Niall groans again, throat scratchy. And oh god, he taste like vomit. 

"Was I sick?" 

"Yep. On my girlfriends top. You offered to wash it. And then was sick again on her feet." 

"I am so sorry." Why the hell was he even here? He is never drinking again. 

"Its OK. Want a bite?" Liam grins holding his sandwich out and waving it under Niall's nose. Niall gags batting his hand away. 

"I would rather die, if I'm not already. Why am I on your sofa Liam?" 

"I not completely sure but you were crying lots and said something about my dad and girls. Is this the condom thing again. I will kill him you know." Niall rubs at his temple, eyes still closed against the light as his head pounds. 

Harry and girls?

What the hell has that been about?

Not the condom thing, that was sorted and it would not have been brought up again. 

"I can't remember." They were at the pub. He is sure they went home. 

Sex. 

There was probably sex. 

There is always sex. 

Think. Think. Think. 

"Said something about babies too. Please tell me he did not get someone pregnant. I will double kill."

Niall's body goes cold his hands dropping from his head. 

"He said... I wish you were a girl. He said that. He wishes I was a girl." Liam frowns, dropping his sandwich down on the coffee table. 

"No he does not. That's stupid." Niall makes a sound that was a mix between a puppy being stepped on and a hiss. 

"Well he fucking said it. Oh god Liam my head." Liam walks away coming back with a glass of water with a straw and two pills.

"Here. How much did you drink last night?"

"You expect me to remember. Enough to be slowly leaving this earth."Liam lifts Niall up be his shoulders so he can slot himself underneath him slowly laying him back down his fingers going into Niall hair to run at his head. 

"Oh Li, I love you. My hangover cure." 

"Yeah whatever. Dad does not wish you were a girl. If he was in the same state as you then you can't really take anything he says to heart." Niall wraps his lips around the straw slowly sipping. 

"I can barely remember anything else. We must have fought about it or I would not be here. I have never walked out the house like this." Niall is far too hungover to know how he feels about it. 

Harry was drunk and he does get a bit shit with his words when he is like that. 

Niall knows Harry has a thing about thinking about Niall pregnant. 

Maybe it was another kink. 

They should really talk about Harry's kinks at some point. 

"I should go talk to him. I can't believe I left, he is going to be so sad."

"Want me to drive you home before I got to work?" Niall looks up at Liam, letting the straw ping out of hi mouth.

"Yes please. Or I will die for real, and I will wash Macy's clothes I promise. I'm sorry I turned up at whatever time and threw up on her." Liam rolls his eyes, scratching at Niall's scalp.

"I did say you could come to me whenever and I meant it, even when your drunk."

"Thanks, I love you." 

"Hmm, you too. And maybe you should still consider getting Landon into a hotel, and not because I think he is some creepy stalker before you go off at me. I do however think that you and dad really need your house back. If money is an issue then have Landon stay here instead, that's better then you and dad never getting time alone." That is certainly something Niall was starting to think about. It had been a couple of months now that him and Harry were alone in their house. 

They should be getting the spare room sorted for it to become a nursery eventually and planning who would be doing what when. Even the wedding once again had not be mentioned. 

"I will think about it Li. I feel up to that sandwich now if you have time."

xxxxx

Harry's car is gone when Liam drops Niall off an hour later and he is a little disappointing. He had hoped Harry would be here so they could sort this out straight away. It was worse that Niall did not really remember the night, he had no idea how much it had escalated. What if he had said something really horrible to Harry?

Landon is sat on the sofa reading a book when Niall let's himself in. He bookmarks it and puts it on the floor as Niall kicks his shoes off. 

"Harry at work?" 

"Yeah. How are you feeling?" Niall shrugs going over to the sofa and sitting down on Landon's lap, curling up until he can rest his head on his chest. 

"My stomach feels like a washing machine but other then that not to bad. Do you by any chance know anything about last night?" Landon's fingers start sliding through his hair, which is nice. 

"I know you had a fight and that you left. Pregnancy and babies were mentioned." Niall turns his head into Landon's chest more, nose pushing into his jumper. 

"We are going to adopt a baby." Landon's hand stops. "We are on this list, our file is, and when someone who is having a baby decides to give it up for adoption they get to look at all the files and pick one. So yeah, we are waiting for that moment. Feels like we have been waiting for ages. Been like six months though I think." 

"Ok. Well...congratulations? Do i say that yet." Niall chuckles, searching for Landon's hand with his own, linking their fingers together when he does.

"You can say it. Getting approved was quite a big deal. Matt and Zayn, they are doing the same thing and it's cool that we are in it together but they already have Rae and Elliott so it feels a little different. I just want a baby with him so badly Lan, and it makes me a little insecure at times. Because I cant just do that for him. I sometimes think he would have been happier with someone who could."

"Oh hey-" Landon gently tugs at Niall's hair until he pulls his head back to look at him. "Harry loves you Niall. It's like sickeningly obvious. Please don't get upset about something like that. He wants a baby with you, not just a baby in general but one with you." And yeah, Niall knows that. He does know that because Harry has said that before. It's still there though. If Harry had fallen in love with someone else then he would have wanted a baby with them. They could have just given him one. And it would have actually been his. 

"Why not get one of the girls to help?" 

"We thought about it, but there were reasons not to so we knew that was not a option. Adoption was the best for us this time round."

"And it will happen. You are going to be a great dad. Bloody hell how weird is that, you being a dad! You can't cope picking a meal at a restaurant half the time and now you are suddenly ready to look after a baby." Niall sits up, grinning.

"Hey, picking what you're going to eat is a really stressful thing alright. You have to get it right or you spend the whole time wishing you had something different. A baby will be way easier then that." Landon tugs him back down until they are both laying flat on the sofa, legs tangled.

"You remember anything else from last night?" Niall wiggles until he can see Landon's face, nose touching and almost going crossed eyes as he looks back at him. 

"Not really, why?" Landon shrugs, bopping Niall's nose.

"No reason. Shall we sleep more."

"Fucking yes." 

xxxxxxxxxxxx

Harry and Niall sit across from each other, tea once again sat in front of them.

"Go trough a lot of tea bags don't we?" Harry's jokes, but Niall can see the worry in his eyes and that just wont do. 

"I don't remember much from last night, but I do remember what you said." Harry nods and starts fiddling with his ring. 

"I am so sorry, it sounded so bad I know. I just did not mean it the way you thought I did. I want you to be you and only you." 

"I know." Because he does, he bloody knows this. "Waiting to hear about a baby is just really hard and I know I should not be thinking like I do. It just happens and I can't help it." 

"I understand that." Harry stops playing with his rings and takes Niall hand to play with his instead. "I'm waiting for this baby too, we are doing this together. It is hard,because we don't know when its going to happen. It just endless waiting instead of the trying for a baby part and then pregnancy part. Its just this endless wait that could go on for a really long time. I am with you on this Niall and we should be excited because it will one day happen and we will be raising a kid together. I don't want you to hate my sexuality because of it." What? Is that what Harry has been thinking this whole time? 

"Harry, love I do not have a problem with you not being Gay. I don't expect you to suddenly only like men just because I do. I don't hate a single thing about you.  I know it seems like that and I know I cling on to the fact that you could have been in a relationship with a woman but that is just me being insecure, the same way that you are about my age. You don't hate that I am so much younger then you but its there sometimes, in your head." Harry looks down at his hand wrapped around Niall's, a small crease between his eyes from were he is frowning. 

"Are we ok? I know what I said and the way I said it was bad and I am so sorry, do you forgive me?" Niall gets up to go sit on Harry's lap, pushing his curls away from his face.

"We are perfect love. I'm sorry I left the house, I hope i did not worry you too much."

"It's fine-" Harry's phone starts ringing "I was a little worried about you out walking so late but Liam let me know you were at his." Niall gets back of Harry's lap so he can get his phone out if his pocket.

"Hey Liam." Niall sits back down in Harry's seat picking up his mug to sip from. 

"What, when?" Harry has his back to Niall, shoulders tensing up. 

"Is she alright?" Niall starts to get the familiar unsettled feeling in his belly. What on earth could it be now. 

"What does Louis think?" Niall gets up going over to Harry resting his hands on his shoulders. Harry shrugs them off moving away from him, hand going into his hair. 

"Of course it fucking was." Harry turns to face Niall, anger all over his face. "I'm going to kill him I swear." Harry hangs up, throwing his phone to the side as he pushes past Niall. 

"What's going on?" Niall grabs the back of his shirt tugging him backwards. Harry slaps his hands away.

"The pub was broken into early this morning. Cassie got hurt." 

"What? Is she OK now? Did she have to go to hospital? Is Lou hurt too?" They should go. Niall spins, trying to remember were he put his phone. They need to go and see if they need them to do anything. That pub was Cassie's whole word she must be heartbroken that someone had managed to brake in, and fuck she was hurt.

"She is at Liam's now." 

"Ok, then we need to go there. Did she see who it was?" 

"No she didn't but i don't think we really need to see to know who this was." Niall stops and looks at Harry. He cant be serious? Was he going to start blaming Landon for world hunger next.

"No. Don't you dare even try that one Harry." Harry opens his mouth to answer but before he can get a word out the front door is banging open and there is a load of yelling. Niall runs out of the kitchen just as Louis is jumping over the coffee table towards Landon.

"Lou stop!" Niall is yanked back by his waist by Harry as Louis drags Landon up from the sofa punching him in the side of the face sending him falling to the floor. 

"Get off me!" Niall kicks out at Harry, twisting his body, trying to get out of Harry's grip.

"Get off him Louis, he didn't do anything."  Louis yanks Landon back up slamming him hard into the wall. 

"He hurt my wife." He punches him again, gripping onto his top to stop him from falling. 

"I didn't do anything! I don't even know what you're on about." Landon holds his hands in front of his face, blood streaked across his cheek as Louis raises his fist again. 

"You know exactly what I am on about you fucking freak. I pissed you off right? Is that what this was about? I pissed you off so you went for her? Or did she just get in the way? My fucking wife you son of a bitch." Louis knees him in the stomach, Landon groaning and bending over.

Niall slips out of Harry's arms, rushing over to push Louis away and crouch down to Landon taking his face into his hands. 

"Leave." He spits the word out at Louis, anger making his whole body shake as he wipes at Landon's cheek with his sleeve. 

"You need to open your fucking eyes to him Niall. He is playing you and you are so fucking stupid if you don't see it. He is doing everything. He drugs Rae and your fucking mopping him up and telling me to leave." Niall ignores Louis, helping Landon to get over to the sofa lifting his top up to check his stomach. 

"Sort this out Harry because I swear to god if this kid is not gone soon I will fucking put a knife in is neck. You are fucking dead." He jabs his finger towards Landon before storming back out the house leaving the door wide open. 

Niall shakes his head getting up to grab a wet cloth from the kitchen for Landon. 

"You are an arsehole." He tells Harry as he passes.

"You are kidding me right."

"No i'm not kidding you. He had nothing to do with this and you fucking held me back so Louis could beat on him." Niall kneels back down in front of Landon, placing the cloth to his cheek. Landon smile weakly at him, putting his hand over Niall's to hold it with him. 

"He had everything to do with it, with everything. He is nasty and vindictive and how you don't see that is blowing my mind right now. He is here because he wants to take you away. He is messing with us all to get to you. He has been telling me himself how he is going to have you again, how he is going to fuck you. He needs to go." Landon shakes his head, eyes sad as he looks down at Niall.

"It's not true. Niall you know I am not like that." Niall nods, rubbing his thumb over Landon's cheek.

"Yes I do know. I know him." He looks back at Harry. "He is nothing like you are making him out to be. You're just jealous and you want him gone and that's not fair. Blaming him on all this messed up shit is really out of order."

"Oh my god Niall." Harry covers his face with his hand letting out a frustrated sound. "Nothing I say is going to make you realise is it? It will always be his word over mine. I'm your fucking fiancee you should be listening to me!" He yells hands dropping to his side. Niall stands up straight.

"I don't have to do anything, not when you are being unnecessarily cruel."

"I'm not!"

 

"Yes you are! If he says he did not do it then he did not. I trust him." Harry and Niall both loom over each other, chest heaving.

"Your going to pick him over me?"

 

"It's not a choice." Harry draws back breathing in through his nose.

"Yes it is. You fucking choose, he goes or I go." Niall scoffs, shaking his head.

"I'm not asking him to leave." Harry nods once, stepping back letting out a small laugh.

"Fine. Right then, fuck you." Harry runs up the stairs, Niall glued in his spot as he listens to him slamming around. Landon sits still on the sofa, head down. 

Harry comes back down quickly, bag in his hand.

"Harry-"

"Shut up." Niall moves towards him as he grabs his shoes. 

"Harry come on. You can't make me choose, that is not fair." Harry throws the bag over his shoulder not looking at Niall.

"But you did choose Niall, i'm leaving." Harry grabs the door not looking back at Niall once as he steps out closing it behind him.

Niall stands staring at the shut door for what feels like hours until Landon slowly moves him back, arm wrapping around his shoulders. 

"Thank you. For believing me." Niall lets Landon lead him back over to the sofa, tugging him down to sit in his lap as he tried to process what just happened. 

"I don't...I don't understand why they keep saying them things about you." Landon shushes him pressing his face into the side of Niall's.

"It's ok love. As long as you believe me. You do don't you?"

"Yeah of course I do. They are the ones in the wrong not you. I can't believe them. I am so sorry." Landon holds Niall closer, fingers rubbing over the exposed skin on his back as he falls back into the sofa more. 

"It's fine. We don't need them do we. Only need each other. I would never make you choose Niall." 


	25. Chapter 25

Niall wakes up the next morning still fully clothed tangled up in Landon's bed with his phone blaring next to his head. 

"Hello?" 

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

"Oh morning Liam." He rolls onto his back, Landon starting to shuffle around next to him. 

"Piss off, what do you think you are doing?" 

"What am I doing? Your dad is the one making me choose"

"Yes and you are suppose to choose him, without even thinking about it Niall its suppose to be him." Niall sits up, blanket falling to his lap.

"Well Landon didn't ask me to choose."

"Because he does not have to, your playing right into his hands you idiot." Landon curls his hand around to Niall's stomach, rubbing in a soothing circle. 

"You said you didn't think he was doing anything."

"Yes because I was trusting you to judge him right but clearly that was a mistake. I'v been talking to Louis and dad too, and it makes sense what they are saying. I think he needs to go and you need to say sorry to dad." 

"No, i wont be doing that. He can say sorry to me and he can say sorry to Landon too. Until then he can just piss off. All of you can." Niall hangs up, throwing his phone to the end of the bed before falling back to the pillow. 

"You alright?" Niall shakes his head, snuggling more into Landon who places a kiss to the back of his head. 

"Let's go make some breakfast. Like how we used to. Pancakes with to much whipped cream." Niall sighs, letting Landon tug the blanket back off them. That does sound kind of  perfect.

xxxx

 

Louis is the next one to call Niall, and he knows as soon as he see the name on the screen that it wont be pretty. 

"If your fucking him I will personally rip your dick off and make you eat it before I stab you in the heart with it."

"Oh nice. That does not even make sense Lou.  Is that what Harry think I am doing then?"

"Can you blame him." 

"Yes actually, I can and no I am not fucking him. Tell Harry we can talk about this more when he is ready to say sorry to us." Niall again hangs up his phone.

"Was that the guard dog?" Landon asked from were he was stacking the dishwasher. 

"Yep."

 

"Can I do anything to take your mind off it?"

 

"Nah, think I will just distract myself. Do housework or something." Landon just nods as Niall gets up from his chair.

xxxxx

He manages to ignore his phone for the time it takes to clean the bathroom and the kitchen. It beeps non stop with texts and phone calls, Niall and Landon sharing a look each time before going back to ignoring it. 

Landon had been really sweet all day, helping Niall out and keeping things as upbeat as possible to keep Niall's mind off Harry. 

Niall was really hurt that Harry wanted him to pick between him and Landon when he should just trust Niall. If Niall thought it was even slightly possible that Landon could be doing any of the things he was being accused of then he would definitely question him about it and ask him to leave if he had to. 

He would never make Harry pick between him and someone else, ever. 

"I'm gonna do the bedrooms next."

"Ok, leave mine though, that's my mess to sort out." Niall picks up his phone, swiping away the many messages and missed calls. None from Harry of course. 

It rings again just before he puts it down, Louis name on the screen once more. Niall chews on his lip while he decides if he should answer it or not. He ends up tapping the green button, Landon pausing what he was doing to listen. 

"Hello."

"She was punched you know. Repeatedly. There were two of them and they forced their way into the pub and started smashing it up." Niall closes his eyes, the thought of it making him feel sick. "And she is so fucking stubborn and brave so of course she tries to stop them. They hurt her Niall and she is my wife who I really fucking love. He done that or he is working with someone, I don't know but he had something to do with it I know he did. Harry is not going to say sorry because how can he look someone like that in the eye and say he is sorry when he is not. I know you have all this guilt and you really want things to be good between you and Landon but your making that cloud your judgement way too much. Please just ask him to leave, he has done too much." Niall looks over at Landon, who is just standing and waiting for Niall to finish his call. Its Landon, who is sweet and funny and caring. Who works every hour under the sun to help his mum keep her restaurant running. Who used to finish a long hard shift only to sit and help his little sister with school work. Who forgave Niall. 

"He has done nothing. I'm not asking him to leave. What happened to Cassie was horrible and Rae and everything else has been horrible but it was not him." Louis curses then hangs up. 

"I'm going to go do the bedroom now." Niall switches his phone off then goes upstairs. 

xxxxxx

Niall pulls the washing out of the dryer before getting up and closing the door with his feet, washing basket in his arms. 

He had forgotten how relaxing housework could be. It had cleared his head loads and it was comforting to have everything in place and smelling so fresh. 

He can't actually remember the last time him and Harry took time to really clean the place. 

Landon had made them both a really nice lunch and was now outside doing some stuff in the garden for Niall. He seemed pretty keen to help Niall which he was really thankful for. It must be really horrible for him, to know everyone thinks he could so many horrendous things. Niall was feeling so ashamed of his friends, even Zayn had called up and shouted down the phone at him and he was normally the one who wanted to keep the peace. 

Niall takes the washing upstairs going straight into his and Harry's room to fold everything up and put it away. He found a few of Landon's things mixed in so laid them to the side. Once everything was away Niall grabbed Landon's clothes and crossed the hallway into his room. 

He had actually kept it quite tidy which was nice. Niall opens a few draws working out where Landon had been putting things before putting the clean stuff away. 

Landon's phone starts ringing just as he is leaving. Niall frowns and looks around for it, eventually finding it in the bed sheet. He grins when he see's that it's Landon's mum calling. He hadn't had the chance to talk to her yet as she kept having to rush off to do stuff. He swiped across the screen to answer.

"Hello beautiful." There is nothing but silence for long enough that Niall pulls the phone away from his ear to check she is still there, when he sees the call is still connected he places it back to his ear. 

"You there love?"

"Niall?" Niall smiles, poking at Landon's suitcase that was sat on the end of the bed.

"The one and only. How are you?"

"I'm good, its so good to hear your voice sweetheart." 

"Your's too, I have missed you and Bethany!" Niall sits down flicking at the open zip.

"And we have been missing you too of course. Landon did not mention you were in German with him? Did you bump into each other? How strange is that. Wonderful too." Niall frowns. Germany? 

"What are you on about love, i am at home, in London. With Landon" Niall slips his hand under the flap, tapping it with his fingers.  

"No, Landon is in Germany with his boyfriend." Niall laughs, wondering if Daisy was losing her mind and Landon had failed to tell him.

"He defiantly is not in Germany, he is currently outside in my garden. I don't think he even has a boyfriend?" He had not mentioned one anyway and he would have done. 

The flap of Landon's suitcase opens and Niall freezes the room around him melting away and he zones in on the stuff inside. 

"Niall you still there?" Niall stands up, shaking hand clutching at his chest.

"What?" 

"I said he does have  a boyfriend, that lovely friend of your's you sent over to us."

"Friend? What?" Niall pulls out his old house key holding it up in front of his face before dropping it to the bed. Next he pulls out his old camera, the one he gave to Bethany that she had lost. The one that all the videos on YouTube came from. 

"Yes. He said you told him to come see us. It was lovely to have someone in your room again Niall and he was so nice." 

"I didn't send a friend. None of my friends have been to Italy Daisy." There are photos too. Niall pulls out endless photos of him, some cut up. Cut up from when Landon had stuck them to his wall. Niall almost drops the phone as he dives into the suitcase pulling everything out, Daisy voice echoing around his head. 

It was all there. His missing key, the camera, photos and even drugs. Niall tips the suitcase upside down, everything that fell to the floor around his feet proof that Landon had been the one to stalk him. 

"Daisy-"

"Landon as been so happy since they started dating, it was a shame he had to go back home but then they planned this holiday and he has been so excited."

How had he not seen this?  
Oh god, they had all be right. Harry had been right all this time and Niall had let him leave. 

"Daisy when did this friend turn up?"

 

"Oh, about six month ago. Stayed for two weeks." Niall covered his mouth with his hand, throat going slick with bile. He didn't know what to do. 

He had to stay calm. That's what Harry would say. Stay calm, get out the house. 

Landon had no reason to think Niall knows. He just had to leave. Landon would not hurt him anyway. 

"What was his name? My friend because I cant remember." His voice his shaking and he sounds frantic. He does not want to panic her, make her not want to talk. He takes a few deep breaths. This 'friend' must have been helping. Who the hell did he know who would want to help Landon with this. 

"It's just Landon has not mentioned anything and I think its really cool that he is so happy. What friend was it again?" 

"I am so surprised he has not said anything, they were shut away so much while he was here. Now I can't remember his surname because you know what i'm like but his name is Matthew, such a sweet boy." 

"Matthew Malik?"

"Yes that's it!" Niall stumbles back phone slipping from his hand the room spinning around him. 

A hand covers his mouth and there is a sharp pain in his neck before everything goes black.  


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING SEXUAL ASSAULT

He feels detached from himself. He is aware of where he is, what is happening but he can't do anything.

His mind is filled with image's of Matt, but it's not the Matt he is used to.

Niall wants to scream, to run but all he can do is lay on the bed looking up at the ceiling.

He can't get his body to move. He is just stuck in his head.

At one point when his eyes open he sees Matthew leaning over him but he can't do anything, he thinks maybe he does scream. 

He doesn't think its real.

He gets things back slowly. A twitch of his hand. His legs dragging up the bed slightly.

He knows he is in Landon's room. He knows he is laying on the bed.

He knows he is hallucinating 

He knows his hands are raised above him, tied to the headboard.

He knows he has to get out of the house.

He can't do anything.

"ketamine." The word is muffled, sounds far away. Niall manages to turn his head to the side and the movement alone makes his eyes want to close again, to go back to a dream filled with nightmares.

"I injected it into you. Quite a lot too so you will be like this for a while." Landon is sat on a chair, next to the bed.

Niall can't reply. Can't even make a small noise.

"We have some things to plan love. I know you're probably confused, I'm sorry for that. You were not supposed to find out, but I'm going to explain what I can. There are a lot of things Matt has asked to tell you himself but we can work around that. So let's talk, or well I will talk and you will listen for now. Then we will get to have some fun." 

Evil. He looks so evil. It's like a complete stranger is looking back at him. 

Xxxx

Liam frowns down at his phone, pressing the end call button. 

"Babe, do you think it's odd that Niall's phone has been off for so long." Macy doesn't look up from her magazine in her lap. 

"Thought you hated him today?"

"I don't hate him, just pissed. I want to make sure he is alright though. Its not like him to keep his phone off for this long." Macy shrugs, finally looking up at Liam. 

"I'm sure he is fine. Maybe he just got fed up with people texting and calling him." Liam pulls at his lip. He feels unsettled, like something is not right.   
Would Niall turn his phone off? 

Maybe for a short time to get some peace but he would turn it back on, wait to hear from Harry. 

Liam sits back down next to Macy who straight away drops her magazine and turns to face him, leg swinging over his lap. Liam smiles, finger wrapping in her hair. 

He glances towards his phone once more, that feeling still curling around in his stomach. But then Macy is kissing at his neck, hand spreading over his chest and it's been so long since she touched him like that. 

He falls down on his back, gently bringing her with him. He will check on Niall later.

Xxxxx

Landon drags his chair closer, until his knees press into the bed. Niall wants to move away but all he manages is to move one of his legs and let out a whimper. 

"So Harry was right after all." he leans his elbows on the bed right next to Niall's head, chin resting in the palm of his hand. 

"I'm a big mean baddie." He lifts his head up bringing one of his hands down to brush his fingers over Niall's lips.   
"I just want you so badly." Niall manages to turn his head to the side, hands moving and brushing against his restraints. 

It feels like the material of a tie. 

He can work with that. 

If he could just get the strength. 

"I'm not going to hurt you love. If anything I'm going to make you feel good. Better then you have for a while I bet." He drags his hands down Niall's neck, over his chest and down to his stomach. Niall gets his body to twist away from it but he falls straight back down again eyes fluttering shut, nausea swirling over him. 

"You're going to be tired for a while." Landon looks over him, eyes slowly moving up and down Niall's body. 

Niall can feels tears rolling down his face, gathering at his throat before dripping onto the bed. He tries to twist his hands but they feel as heavy as  concrete blocks. 

"We could have done this such a nicer way if you just kept your nose out of my stuff. It's a shame but we can work trough that." Landon gets up from the chair, moving to stand at the foot of the bed Niall following him with his eyes. 

"It's been fun, watching you defend me so loyally. Against Harry of all people. God you really didn't think I was capable of all this did you? Like you didn't fuck me up enough to make me want to do this." Landon knells on the bed, moving Niall's feet to the side to make room for himself. 

"You know, I did start to forget about you a little. Probably would have left you alone if it was not for Matt coming to find me. That was a surprise." He shuffles up the bed more, blanket gathering up around his knees. Niall tries to shift away from him. 

"He is not actually my boyfriend of course. He is hot and I can't say I would have turned him down if he wanted a dirty fuck, but he only wants Zayn. I think he would do just about everything to keep him." Niall shakes his head, the movement making the room spin and another wave of exhaustion wash over him. 

Matt had no reason to think he would not keep Zayn. It was obvious to anyone within looking  distance of the couple that Zayn wanted nothing but Matt. He loved Niall but it was nothing compared to what he had with Matt. 

Would he really do all this over so thing that didn't matter?

"You're weak right now baby, and your not going to be able to fight back for a while. So I need to make you see, while I can, I need to make you see how good we are." He crawls up Niall's  body stopping with his legs either side of his chest hands undoing his jeans.

"I have wanted your mouth so badly. And you used to love doing this so much" 

Niall tries. He really does. 

He tries to kick and scream and twist to get Landon off him. He pulls at his wrist as hard as he can. Tries to bite down or pull away. 

In the end all he can do is lay there and let Landon do what he wants. 

Xxxxx

"Whats up bitches." Liam huffs pulling away from Macy.

"Perfect timing Cass." Cassie comes onto the room, waggling her eyebrows when she finds the pair laying on the sofa. 

Liam had only just seen her this morning but the sight of her face still made him see red. 

Both her eyes were a horrible shade of black and yellow, her left cheek still slightly swollen. He had no idea how she was smiling and being normal right now. 

"It certainly does look like it. Your naughty kids." Macy pats Liam's cheek, giving him a look which he thinks is a promise for this to continue later. 

It's been weeks since he got to do anything with her and when it seems like she is about to let him closer the bloody female version of Louis barges in. 

"I would leave but Louis and Harry are currently having a slagging fest about Mr creepy pants and its doing me head it. Also look." She holds up a book swaying her hips as she walks towards them. 

"Wedding photos came back today." Macy 'ooos' sitting up and straightening out her top. 

"Let's have a look then. Liam go get us drinks." Liam gets up making a show of sighing and dragging his feet on the way to the kitchen. 

"How is Dad?" 

"Upset, pissed. Plotting death. Its all rather dramatic right now." 

"It's always dramatic." Liam passes them both a can of cola before sitting down with a beer for himself. 

"You are right Liam it is. Which is why we are going to spend a really boring evening looking at my wedding photos, and pretending my face looks like this right now." She points at the photo of her and Louis on the front cover.

Liam picks his phone up, unlocking it to call Niall again. 

His phone is still turned off. 

"You girls mind if I go see Niall." 

"Oh no, come on stay and look at these with me." Liam settles back down with a shrug. 

"OK. I will go see him after." 

Xxxxx

Landon uses his thumb to wipe away some come on the corner of Niall's lips.

"Your so good to me." Niall's chin wobbles as he turns his face away from him.

"You should start feeling a little more alert soon, and then we can chat. I will go make us some food, that will help. I really love you Niall and I'm going to make you so happy." Niall clamps his jaw down, refusing to cry until Landon has left the room. 

He leaves the door slightly ajar so Niall can hear as he walks down the stairs and into the kitchen. 

Can hear the kettle and the pots and pans. 

Can hear Landon going about like he didn't just force Niall to take his dick into his mouth. 

It starts to get dark outside while Landon is cooking so Niall guesses it must be nearly four. Nobody will be coming to see him. He was stuck here with Landon for a least another night. 

He had to get out himself. 

He starts feeling stronger as the time passes. The sun getting lower and the room darker. Niall bites down on the inside of his cheek to stop himself from crying out and he pulls down on the ties keeping his wrist bound to the bed. 

He thinks about other things as the material digs into his skin. 

Harry smiling.   
Harry laughing.   
Rae running up to him arms raised for a hug.   
Elliott stumbling around with his cars. 

He hears a rip, his heart pounding as his looks up. The tie on his right wrist has torn just a little. 

He relaxes and gives himself a break, wrist throbbing

He should have called his dad today. He would have come over after work to check on him. 

He braces his feet onto the mattress ready to start all over again when he hears Landon on the stairs. 

Niall curses then shifts himself up the bed as high as he can, hopefully covering the torn tie with his back. 

Landon is carrying a tray with two bowls, drinks and cutlery on. 

"See told you that you would be feeling better soon. I made some vegetable soup." Landon sits by Niall's feet to feed him. Niall stares at the spoon being offered to him before parting his lips to let Landon tip some into his mouth. 

He was going to need his strength if he was going to fight his way out of here. 

"What's you're plan?" It's the first time he has spoken and he let's himself believe his voice is scratchy through lack of use and not other reasons. 

"I think you know my plan. Everyone else seems to." 

"You want me back, and your just going to force me? How is that going to to work exactly?" Landon spoons Niall more soup, wiping away a small but the spilt down his chin. 

"I'm not going to force you. You are going to want to." 

"No. That's never going to happen." Landon sighs, shaking his head. Like Niall is some child who has disappointed him. 

"Do you think Harry will want you now? When I tell him what we have done. Because he won't. They will all hate you and your only option will be to leave with me." 

"We haven't done anything. You forced yourself on me and Harry will know that. I will never leave with you." Landon moves the tray of food to the floor then leans over Niall, his chest pushing into his knees. 

"You will do exactly what I tell you to do." He strokes his hand across Niall's cheek, gripping on tighter when he tries to move away. 

"I just need to make you remember how good we were together. Tonight is going to be so special." Landon presses his lips to Niall's so he bits down hard blood spilling into his mouth. Landon shouts, pulling back to smack Niall across the face. 

Niall gasps, vision going blurry from the force. 

"You will love me again." He grabs Niall's hair yanking his head back, eyes wild and blood dripping from his lip. "You will fucking love me, or i will go after them all." He let's go, Niall's head hitting the wall, then he leaves the room slamming the door shut behind him. The tray is still on floor, Niall looks at it for a moment wondering if he will come back for it. 

He braces himself again then starts pulling. 

Xxxxx

Liam sends a text off to both Zayn and Louis to see if they had heard anything else from Niall. 

Cassie and Macy were laughing over some pictures of Louis with his siblings now both moved on to drinking wine. 

Zayn replies first to say he has not spoken to him since this morning and does not want to. 

Louis reply is Niall who? 

Liam rolls his eyes going to Niall's number again and dialling. 

Still it's turned off. 

"Babe, why don't you ring the house phone if your worried." Of course, why did he not think of that. He brings up the home number feeling annoyed with himself for not thinking to ring that sooner. 

It rings eight times before Liam hangs up. 

"No answer." 

"Maybe him and Landon went out and he just left his phone at home or it ran out of battery." That could be the reason, but something just did not feel right. 

"I'm just going to go over there." Macy lays her hand over his leg to stop him getting up. 

"Just leave it love. After what he done to your dad yesterday he does not deserve you running around after him. Just let him mope and maybe once he realises it's not working he will pull his head out of Landon's arse and sort himself out." 

Liam agrees but he still feels that niggling feeling. 

Xxxxx

Niall has nearly torn through both ties when Landon comes back. He moves the tray away from the bed then closes the curtains. 

He seems agitated, his lip no longer healing but slightly swollen. 

"I'm sorry you had to find out about Matt the way you did. I never wanted you to find out about him, you're such close friends." Niall is refusing to think about that at the moment. His current situation is bad enough without letting himself think about Matt going behind his back and starting all this. How he is going to have to tell Zayn and break his heart. 

"He knows that you know and has asked me to leave most the talking to him. I think he really is sorry if that helps." 

"It was his idea?" 

"Yes. He came up with the idea to scare you so that I could easily take you away. It was suppose to be easy anyway. Just got complicated didn't it." So that was why he was so agitated. He had to think of a new plan quickly, probably had not expected to be found out. 

"Yeah I guess. Can't really see how you are going to get me to agree to go to Venice with you now." Landon walks back over to the bed, arms behind his back eyes on Niall's face. 

"My plan is not to take you home straight away. Obviously I knew there was going to be resistance the second you found that stuff in my bag." Niall tugs on his hand again, it's getting looser but he is not sure he can keep trying to break them while Landon is in the room. 

"What's the plan then? You can't keep me here for too long. Someone is bound to come see me soon. Harry will probably come back to talk." Landon sits on the bed, slipping his jumper off and throwing it on the floor. 

"I have some people coming late tonight when I can get you out the house unnoticed. I'm taking you somewhere where we can work on us for a bit. When I think you are ready we will book our flights home." Niall laughs, head falling back. He tugs his hands again. 

"Work on us? Jesus you really are crazy. You were good at hiding it though I will give you that, I actually thought you were still a decent person. Harry will come looking for me and he will find me. There is no way he will just let me leave. I will never love you either. You can try whatever you think will work on me. I love Harry and it will always be him for me." Landon stands up again, walking over to his suitcase to pick it up and place it on the dressing table. 

"You will because I won't stop until you do. I don't care how long it take. You're never going see Harry again Niall, you two are over. It's me and you now." 

There is this small part of Niall, he is shocked to realise, that actually feels a little guilty as he watches Landon go trough his bag. He turned him into this. He let him fall in love then he broke him, he knew he was doing it too. He knew that even if he had stayed in Venice he would never have loved Landon back. 

This was his fault. 

"I'm sorry. For the what I did to you, you know I'm sorry. I fell terrible but it does not make this OK. I can't love you if you do this Landon. I can't love you after what you have already done. You should just let me go and you should leave and we will carry on like nothing happened. Maybe we can stay being friends. I won't tell Harry or anyone. It will all be over." He already knows its pointless but he has to try, there might still be some of Landon left inside whoever this person is. His Landon. 

"You are going to ring Harry and you are going to tell him that me and you are together. He won't come looking for you because you're going to leave him."

"Fuck you, that is not happening." Landon turns clutching a needle in his hand. He charges across to the bed straddling Niall's waist. 

"No baby I'm going to fuck you. And after you are going to dump that pathetic piece of shit. And if you don't then I will call my friends up, the ones who I sent to the pub last night. They are more then happy to go after that so called family of yours and this time I won't tell them to stop. Maybe they could visit Macy and Liam. Or Cassie could get a repeat performance. Or I could go for the kids, snatch little Rae up when daddy has his back turned or poor little Elliott could have an unfortunate accident. Or even better, River, she is all on her own in the flat. Could she defend herself and Nolan against two men? " 

"If anyone gets hurt I will fucking kill you. I'll fucking kill you!"? Niall thrashes about legs kicking. Landon leans up and grips onto the headboard smiling down at Niall as he kicks and screams at him. 

"I think it's time for us to have some fun don't you babe?" Landon holds the needle up tapping it with his fingers. Niall yanks his arms again, twisting side to side as Landon tries to put the needles to his neck. 

Landon grabs his chin hard, pushing his head down into the pillow. 

"No, Landon no please, ah.." the needle pieces his skin. Niall yanks his hands again and this time the material snaps. Niall sits up slamming his body into Landon's, the shock of it making it easy to send him toppling off the bed. Niall trows himself to the floor, Landon grabbing at his ankles. 

The tray is right in front of him, like he had planned so he grabs it sending the bowls sliding to the carpet. He turns slamming the tray into the side of Landon head. The impact is enough to make Landon let go of him. Niall gets up and runs as fast as he can out of the room and towards the stairs. 

He nearly falls at the bottom, his legs wobble and nearly give out, whatever drug Landon had given him starting to take effect already. 

He forces himself to keep moving trying the front door and pushing on the windows. 

He turns, the room carries on spinning. 

His phone. His phone is on the table. He moves toward it, legs finally giving way sending him to the floor with a loud thud. 

He drags himself, breath loud in his ears, towards the phone. His eyes flutter shut but he forces them to stay open. He just has to get to his phone. Once he is safe he can rest. 

Xxxxx

Liam is flicking through Cassie's photos having given up ages ago on trying to keep up with whatever they were gossiping about. 

There is a nice photo of him and Niall standing together talking, unaware of the picture being taking. 

This photographer had been good, there were so many natural pictures.. Liam hated when people posed. 

The group photos had him chuckling to himself, only one had turned out well but it was kind of perfect. He knew Cassie was secretly over the moon with the silly ones. 

He turns to the next page before frowning and going back. 

"Hey." Both girls stop talking, turning to Liam. He points at a photo on the bottom corner of the page. 

"Do you see what I see?" They both lean closer, squashing against Liam to look were his finger is pointing. 

"It can't be right?" Liam can't really explain the feeling the hits him in they moment. It's worse then dread and as soon as he feels it he just knows. 

"It's Landon. He was there at the wedding." You can only just make out his face, hidden mostly by a bush as he make his way towards the hotel.

"Didn't Niall think their room was broken in to?" Liam gets up, book falling to the floor. 

"Call dad now tell him to get home. I think Niall is in trouble." Liam shoves his shoes on and is out the door in seconds. He knew he should have gone as soon as Niall phone was switched off. He knew something was not right. 

Xxxx

Niall is pulled back just as his fingers brush his phone. Landon spins him round on his back and he goes easily. 

He just wants to sleep. 

He feels a tug and looks down. Landon is pulling his jeans down. 

"No. No I don't wanna." 

"It's OK baby. I will make it good yeah." Niall pushes him away managing to turn and drag himself back towards his phone a little. 

He just needed Harry. He had to get Harry. 

Landon drags him. His top rides up, carpet burning at his skin as Landon keeps dragging him away from the table and his phone. 

"Landon, please. I don't want this. Please." Niall's arms fall  to his side, body going limp. This time when Landon tugs at his jeans Niall can't do anything about it. 

Landon keeps talking to him but it sounds too slow and jumbled for Niall to understand. 

He is turned again, face pressing into the carpet as he swallows down the urge to throw up, there is pressure then a sharp pain and Niall does throw up this time.

Xxxx

Liam stops the car down the road a little and jumps out running the rest of the way. 

The house looks normal, lights on and calm. 

He opens the door slowly having no idea what he could be walking in on. 

What he does see it probably the last thing he expects. 

He doesn't even think. 

He just sees Niall pinned to the floor, Landon over him and he grabs the lamp swinging it down to his head with a sickening crunch. 

Xxxxx

Niall can feel himself being pulled about again, touch much more gently this time. 

He blinks his eyes back open and is meet with the familiar brown of Liam's eyes. He let's out a sigh of relief body sagging again as he let's himself drift, just for a bit. He is so tired. 

His eyes ping back open what feels like second later and this time the hands on him are more frantic, pulling him away from Liam. 

Niall sobs when he sees Harry. 

"Baby, baby I'm so sorry." He tucks Niall under his chin. His fingers dig into his back a little to hard but he doesn't care. Harry is here. Everything is OK if Harry is here. 

"I think he is drugged." Niall eyes flicker over to Liam then he makes a noise, tries to form words but can't. 

Niall is lifted up then placed on the sofa, Harry's hands never leaving him as he stokes over his hair and gently pats over his body like he expect to find him damaged. Maybe he is. 

"You're OK. Its OK baby boy. I'm sorry I left. Niall I am so sorry." Niall wants to lift his arm up to comfort him. Wants to tell him it's not Harry's fault. It's his fault. He done this. 

Instead he falls asleep. 

Xxxx

"Why has he not woken up Dad. I think I hit him really hard, maybe we should check if he is breathing." 

"With a bit of luck he isn't." 

"Jesus don't say the Zayn, i'm the one that fucking hit him." 

"He is breathing, not much blood either." 

"His trousers are down a little." 

"Niall's were too. I don't think he was like..you know, but he was about too."

"Whatever happened, he threw up. Must have been bad." 

The voices are jumbled and Niall can't really make them out as he blinks open his eyes. 

His head is pounding his throat so dry it hurts. 

"Harry?" His voice comes out a whisper but Harry hears him and is by his side in seconds. 

"Hey love, I'm here." Niall looks past Harry and can see Zayn, chewing on his thumb as he looks back at Niall. 

"Landon.... I'm sorry I didn't believe you. I'm so fucking stupid and I am so sorry." Niall starts crying and he suddenly can't stop. Massive sobs that burn at his throat and stab at his chest. 

Harry holds him tightly, Liam's hand running over his back and Zayn's wrapping around his foot. Niall looks at Zayn, thinks of what he has yet to find out and he cries harder his heart breaking for him. 

"I think he is waking up." Zayn whispers peering over the top of the sofa. There is a groan then the sound of Landon moving. 

"Liam take Niall into the kitchen." Harry and Liam both help Niall get to his feet, Liam wrapping his arms around him to keep him steady. 

"What are you going to do?" 

"You don't need to worry about that, I just want you and Niall out of the room. Now." 

"Zayn?" Niall looks over to him, expecting him to follow behind him and Liam. 

"He is going to stay with me. If he wants to." Zayn nods, glaring down at Landon. 

"Yeah I want to." Liam hesitates for a second then walks him and Niall into the kitchen. Niall looks over his shoulder, eyes meeting Landon's just before the door shuts. 

Liam sits them down on the floor, his back against the cupboard door and Niall leaning into his side. 

"What did he give you?" 

"ketamine the first time, this time I'm not sure, same I guess." 

"Fuck." Niall think he can hear the soft thud of skin hitting skin. He looks up at Liam reaching for his hand to hold. 

"Liam-" his voice wobbles, Liam presses a kiss to his forehead. 

"Yeah?" he was going to tell him about Matt but the words get stuck in his throat. He doesn't want to say them out loud. Doesn't want to make it real. 

If he is going to say it then it should be to Zayn first anyway. 

"He was going to take me away tonight, so thank you for coming."

"It's OK. My best friend senses were tingling." Despite everything Niall manages to laugh.

They both pretend to now hear what's going on in the other room.

"What made you come here though?" Niall thought for sure nobody would come see him until at least tomorrow, he had pissed them all off so much.  He thought it would be too late. That they would find the house empty. Think Niall had left with Landon because he wanted to. He had been so bloody stupid and he was so ashamed of himself for not trusting and listening to the people he loved.

"Cass came over with wedding photos. Landon was in the background of one." So he had broken into Niall and Harry's room then. With the help of Matt. "I was already worried because your phone had been off for so long."

"How is Cass?"

"You know her, we won't really know how she is, she will just go round acting fine. Think Louis is feeling everything for her."

They keep doing this. Talking and distracting each other. It's only fifteen minutes until it all goes quite and the kitchen door opens.

Liam and Niall both watch nervously as Harry and Zayn come in.

Niall notches the blood on Harry's hands first, the cuts around his knuckles. It looked like he had not held back at all.

Zayn's hands look the same, a splatter of blood over his neck. Liam shifts, making sure Niall is balanced before he pulls himself up to his feet.

"Is he-"

"Its not for you to worry about Liam." The tone to Harry voice shuts Liam up, his mouth snapping shut. Zayn goes over to the sink washing his hand under the water.

"I should get home. Have a shower."

"No!" Niall panics, reaching up to grab Zayn's leg. "Stay here. I want you here tonight."

"OK." Zayn crouches down, water drilling off his hand and onto the floor. "I can stay if that is what you definitely want."

"I will stay too, if that's alright." Liam is getting the first aid box down from the cupboard, sending Harry a worried look.

"Please." Niall thinks he could do with them all being here tonight.

Harry helps Niall back up taking him trough the living room, ignoring Liam telling him to fix his hand up. Landon is not there but there is blood on the floor and on the wall. Niall avoids looking at the sick on the floor. 

"Tell me what to do." Harry sounds so lost.

"I want to wash. I just want to get clean and you too, and then I want to get into bed with you. I'm so sorry Harry."

"I'm sorry too. I should never have left. I knew what he as doing and I just walked out and left you with him."

"It's not your fault." They takes the stairs slowly, Niall still unsteady on his feet.

"My job is to keep you safe and I failed." They stop outside the spare room both looking in at the mess.

"What did he do?" Niall turns, using the wall for support as he walks out of Harry's arms.

"I can't remember."

"Ni-"

"I just want to get clean harry." He feels like scrubbing his skin off. Like pouring bleach down his throat.

"OK baby. Let's get clean." Niall pretends to not see Harry cry as they both stand under the shower together.

Xxxxxx

Niall waits until all three of them are asleep. Harry pressed to his back, Liam and Zayn curled up at the end of the bed.

He slips out slowly, managing a small smile when he sees Zayn's pinky finger linked with Liams.

He pulls a jumper on then slips out of the room heading down the stairs.

He does not have the energy for tying shoes so he pushes his feet into Harry's slippers before unlocking the front door making sure to lock it again before he walks down the driveway.

He is not sure how safe walking in the middle of the night is. He feels pretty certain that Landon would be in no state to come after him, but that did not mean these people he got to smash up the pub wouldn't do it for him.

He walks as quick as he can eyes darting around as he went.

When he gets to Matt and Zayn's house he looks up at the window he know belong to Elliott. He can see the faint glow of his nightlight.

This could be a really bad idea.  
He has to know.  
He has to find a way to understand why Matt had done this.  
He needs to know as much as possible before he tells Zayn. 

He walks up to the front door testing the handle. The door swings  open and at the end of the hallway Niall can see the kitchen light on. 

He has a feeling Matt has been waiting for him. 

He steps into the house, closing the door behind him then makes his way towards the kitchen.


	27. Chapter 27

Niall walks slowly down the dark corridor, heart pounding in his chest as he move closer to the kitchen. His eyes travel to the stairs thinking of the kids upstairs tucked into bed.

Matt and Zayn had probably put them up there together, Zayn completely unaware of what the man tucking his children into bed had been doing to them all. To Rae.

Niall has to stop. Has to press his forehead to the wall and take deep breaths, throat burning with the urge to cry.

Had Matt know what Landon was doing to Niall today. Did he know what he had planned and done nothing to stop it.

Maybe he had helped.  
Helped Landon find a location that he could take Niall to.  
Helped him find people to help force Niall into a car in the middle of the night and take him away from Harry.  
Was he just going to carry on acting innocent? Help Harry search for him even though he knew exactly were Niall was. Comfort Harry when he thought Niall had run off with Landon.

Niall can't connect the two people together in his head.

The Matt he knows. The doting husband. The fun, caring, patient father. Niall's family.

Then there is this new Matt. The one who wants Niall gone. Who would pass him off to Landon just so he was away from Zayn. Who scared him. Made him feel unsafe in his own home. Hurt Cassie and Zayn. Tried to break him and Harry up. 

Rae.

He refuses to believe he could have done that. Not on purpose.

He steps away from the wall rubbing his hand over his face. He was exhausted. He just wants this all to end.

He goes into the kitchen.

Matt is sitting at the island in the middle of the kitchen. Where Niall had been sat just a few days ago when Rae collapsed.

Niall had been so stupid.  
He had let Landon be alone with Rae.  
If he had just listened to Harry it would never have happened.

He has a whisky glass in front of him, his hand still wrapped around the bottle. 

He gets up as Niall sits down to grab him a glass, pouring him some whisky before sliding it over. 

Niall downs it in one go, face screwing up. He wipes his mouth with the back of his hand before pouring himself some more. 

He can't being himself too look up at matt.  
Scared in case there was not a single trace of regret on his face.

Landon had looked so evil. He can't bare to see the same look on someone he loves.

"Zayn never came home." 

"He is at mine. I have not told him yet." Niall lays his arms on the table, looking down at the bruises forming there, the red were the skin had rubbed away. 

He thinks of Harry who had sat him down in the bathroom to clean it up. Niall had tried counting the tears rolling down Harry's face. 

"He was going to force me to have sex with him Matt, would have been quite successful if Liam had not got there on time."

"Please don't-"

"He had time to shove his dick in my mouth though."

"Niall please "

"I don't understand." Niall's voice breaks so he quickly downs his drink.

"He said you started it. Is that true?"

"Yes." Niall drops his head down. He can hear the slosh of more whiskey being poured. The small part of him that had hope that Landon was lying shattered.

"Why?" Niall hears him shuffle around in his seat. The drag off the bottle. He still can't bring himself to look up. He places his thumb over the damaged skin of his wrist and presses down. 

"Because I wanted you gone and I knew there was a chance he would want you back." Niall releases his wrist, sitting back slightly. 

"Try and explain it to me, just make me understand how you got to this point. When you started hating me enough to want to rip my whole fucking life apart." 

"Niall I am so sor-" 

"Don't you dare fucking say sorry to me. It means shit you fucking arsehole. Just fucking talk." Matt let's out a shaky breath hands spreading out in front of him. 

"Zayn told me he was in love with you on our fourth date. He said he knew we were heading to a good place and he wanted to be honest. They really push that into you at rehab, honesty. I was fine with it, you kind of seemed like this fictional character so I did not have to worry about you." Niall takes his glass, this time taking a smaller sip. 

" You weren't jealous? Worried?"

" I had no reason to be. You were not even in the same country as him and he didn't think you would be coming back. You didn't matter."

"Then what? I came back and suddenly I was this big threat?" 

"I was fine when you came back. He was my husband, he loved me and we had a family. I never thought of you as a threat. I was honestly happy to meet you. My friendship with you, the love I have for you and Harry is real." Niall scoffs, sliding his glass back towards Matt for him to refill. He watches Matts hand as it grips the bottle, can see the shake as he pours. 

"What changed?" Niall wondered how much time of their friendship Matt had spent planning this. Thinking of ways to get rid of Niall, while Niall thought everything was good. 

"Zayn changed. He started loving you more. Hanging on to every word you said, itching to go over and see you. I don't think he even noticed it himself, but I did." Niall looks up a little higher, were Matts top met his chest, showing of his pale skin. The small mole that Niall had poked at many times while curled up on Matts lap. Laughing at what he had said, feeling loved and so happy to have him in his life. 

"I obviously knew about Landon from some things Zayn had told me. I knew about that arrangement you had, where he would let you imagine he was Harry. It really messed with his head by the way. It seems obvious that you had left him heartbroken, that maybe he was not over you. So I looked him up, found the restaurant and told Zayn work were sending me away for training and I went to see him. You should have seen his face when I said I knew you. He is so in love with you, but then again isn't everyone." He drinks straight from the bottle, some whisky spilling from his mouth and landing on the worktop. He slams it back down loudly, the sound making Niall flinch. 

" I told him I wanted you gone and as far away from my husband as possible. I asked him if he could help me, said we could work together and for his help he would have you. I just wanted you away from Zayn so badly. I wasn't thinking straight. I was scared. Every fucking morning I woke up expecting to find him packing his bags because I wasn't enough more." 

" But he never wanted me. He loved me but he didn't want me. He told me that. He said you are his person, his soulmate and that he could never love me the same way he loves you. It was different." 

"I know. I fucking know that but it was still so fucking hard. He shouldn't have loved you at all, not even a little bit. It's not supposed to be like that. He loved you enough that even Harry could tell just by looking at him when he is around you. That's too much love for me to share, your not entitled to that love. I was there for him when he was he rehab. I married him. I had a family with him. I dealt with the relapses and made him better each time. I don't want to share him. "

For the first time since he walked into the room Niall looks up and meets his eyes. 

He is not sure what he expected. For Matt too look completely different maybe. For his kind blue eyes to suddenly be a sinister red, like the devil. 

He still looked like him though. Niall can see the regret.   
It's like someone had punched him on the gut.  
Its worse because this really is the Matt he loves. The Matt that Zayn loves and he was capable of doing this. 

"You didn't mind sharing me when you were fucking me. Jesus fuck Matt, you were doing all this messed up shit and you still thought it was OK to have sex with me. To let Zayn have sex with me." 

"I wanted to make him happy. You asked him and I could tell he really wanted it and I was to scared to say no. And it wasn't exactly hard for me. Turns out you're a good fuck." Niall stands up, the sudden movement making his chair topple to the floor. Anger flashes in his eyes and he has to bend down a little to catch his breath. 

He feels sick with it, his skin crawling as he sees it all in his head.   
Matts hands all over him. Kissing him. Mouth wrapped around his dick. Looking down at him as he fucked into him. 

"Did it help get you off? Fucking me like that. Vulnerable. Open for you. Did it make it feel good for you, knowing what you were doing to me? All the things you had planned." 

"No! It wasn't like that. I didn't even think about it I just-" 

"Did you drug Zayn?" Niall straightens up again, looking directly at Matt as he asks. 

"I put something in his drink while he was taking Rae to the toilet."

"And you put drugs around the house for him to find? It made him feel like shit Matt, you made him feel like shit. Like before, when everyone just thought he was some messed up addict. You brought that all back for him. How could you? What if he didn't stop. What if he took it all and killed himself." Matt shakes his head, stepping towards Niall. 

"Stay away from me." Niall holds his hands up backing away. Matt looks hurt but steps back arms wrapping around his waist. 

"I knew it would be OK. I know how to help him and what to look out for. I knew where the drugs were and when he would find them to make sure I was with him and able to take them away, the others I pretended i had found." 

"What was the point of it Matt? Did you want to punish him?" God, the thought of Matt sneaking around the home he shared with Zayn and the kids. The place that Zayn felt the most loved and protected. It made Niall want to scream. 

How was Zayn going to manage to carry on when he knows what had been done to him by the man he loves more then anything?

"I never wanted to punish or hurt him. Landon said that if we made it look like someone was targeting Zayn because of you then it would be easier to convince you to leave with him. He told me to spike Zayn's drink and then leave him with you, to let you see what it does to him. To make you scared it will happen again if you stuck around for this stalker to keep coming after him and the others."

"So it was Landon's idea and you just went along with it? You would actually do anything to get me go?" 

"I wanted to stop Niall. I swear I wanted it all to just stop. Landon was getting carried away and he started doing stuff that we had not discussed and that I had never agreed to do. I regretted ever going to him. I wish I had never done it. We were supposed to just frighten you, with the photos and making it seem like someone was getting into your house. That's all I agreed to and he said he would work on getting you to leave with him. I wanted to stop." Matt is crying now and normally it would have Niall over to him in seconds. Wiping away his tears and comforting him.   
Now he just looks away and let's him cry. 

" Rae." Matt let's put a sob and out of the corner of his eye Niall can see him slump over the table face pressed into his arms as he broke down. 

Niall looks up at the ceiling. Rae's room is above the kitchen. All pink and full of barbies and teddy's and other innocent child things. 

She is just a baby still.  
It didn't make sense that she had managed to be dragged into this. 

"Was the an unexpected part of the plan? Or did you just get sloppy with your hiding places? Forgot you had a daughter who could find them? You blamed Zayn for that right in front of us all, in front of the doctor." Matt stood back up, gripping onto the counter. 

" At first I thought it was him. I never hid any Tramadol around the house. I thought maybe I hadn't watched him as well as I thought and he had started taking again and had left the tablets laying around." Matt wiped at his face, taking a few deep breaths as he walks around the table to grab the bottle of whisky. He drinks straight from the bottle again, hands still shaking. 

"The day before it happened I told Landon I was not doing it anymore. I felt so guilty and I was disgusted with myself. I went to Landon without thinking it over. I was panicking about Zayn leaving me. I just wanted to do something to keep my husband. I wish I never went. Its the worse thing I have ever done and I will always regret it. So yeah, I told him we had gone too far that it was not even going to to work. Nothing was going to make you leave Harry. I wanted it to end." Niall closes his eyes, pressing the pads of his fingers to them to try and relive some of the pressure in his head. 

He had defended Landon again and again.   
If he had just listened and seen what he was like then none of this would have happened. Everything would still be normal. 

"He rang me not long after you left the hospital. Told me it was my warning of what he was capable of doing if I stopped. He said he would keep coming after the kids if I did not do as he said. So I had no choice. I had to carry on." 

"Cassie?" 

"That was just him too. He said he was fed up with Louis being so smug all the time. He paid these two idiots to go in and smash the place up, he told them that they could slap her about a bit if she got in the way. It's Cassie so of course she did. If I had known he was going to do it I would have made sure it didn't happen. I wish I could have stopped it all." 

"You could have. You could have come to me and explained, before it was too late."

"I couldn't. Landon had all this stuff on me Niall and  would have gone straight to Zayn if I didn't keep helping him. This was all for Zayn, to make sure I didn't lose him. He knew I would do anything to stop him from finding out so he used it against me. There was nothing I could do. I was scared."

"No I was scared." The anger that slams into Niall is so sudden and so strong and he is grabbing the bottle between them before he even knows it and throwing it to the wall. Glass and liquid fly everywhere and it does nothing to calm Niall down.   
"I was fucking scared! You're just pathetic and weak."

"Daddy?" Niall spins around as Rae stumbles into the kitchen looking all rumbled and sleepy. Matt rushed towards her to stop her from walking in the glass, scooping her up and putting her on his hip. 

Niall wipes at his face and forces a smile as she looks around the kitchen. 

"Hey beautiful, girl what you doing out of bed?" Matt voice is wobbly and strained but Rae does not seem to notice. She places a hand on both his cheeks.   
"You were being loud."  
"I'm so sorry sweetheart, we will keep it down now so you can sleep." Rae looks over to Niall, eyes puffy from sleep and pillow creases down the side her her face.  
"why you here uncle Niall? It's bedtime." Niall steps forward holding his arms out, Rae wiggles away from Matt and leans over for Niall to take her.  
"Me and daddy are just talking about something, sorry we got loud princess."  
"You angry?" Niall holds her face against hers, breathing in her sleepy smell.  
"No I'm not angry. You let daddy put you back to bed. Love you." Niall kisses the top of her head before passing her back over to Matt.

He leans on the door frame watching Matt walk up the hallway, Rae's head resting on his shoulder as Matt whispers to her.

When they go up the stairs Niall grabs the broom out of the cupboard and starts to clean the mess up. Taking this time to try and clear his head a little. He felt terrible for losing his temper when the kids were just  upstairs asleep.

By the time Matt gets back down Niall had sweeped and mopped up the mess and is leaning on the wall furthest away from the doorway hoping Matt will stay there and keep the space between them. 

"You're my family." Matts face crumbled again. 

"I know." 

"I was so scared." Matt dropped his head, shoulder shaking as he cried.   
"That's what hurts the most, that it was you. I love you and I trusted you. I feel safe with you. It really hurts." Niall covers his face, slouching back into the wall and sliding down to the floor knees drawn up to his chest. 

"Was it even worth it? Because I'm not gone, I never would have gone. So was it worth it? Terrorising me. Drugging Zayn. Rae getting put in hospital, Cassie being beaten? I was assaulted today." Matt shakes his head, dropping to his knees finger in his hair tugging. 

" I am so sorry. I never thought he would-"

"Would what? Tie me up. Drug me so I was to weak to fight. Shove his dick into my mouth until he was coming down my throat forcing me to swallow. Start ripping my clothes off ready to fuck me." Matt crawls towards Niall a little, sobbing and shaking his head. 

"He lost it Ni. I tired to stop him, I promise I tried to stop it all. He just went fucking mental. You fucked him up. He is fucked up. I couldn't do anything. I'm sorry, I wish I never asked him to come. I will regret it for the rest of my life." 

"I will have to tell Harry. I will have to watch his face and listen to him cry and try to make it all OK again. I have to tell him that I was raped today. I was raped Matt, and you are part of the reason." Niall brakes down, crying into his arms. 

He was raped and it was Matt's fault. Matt is the reason Landon was here. Landon would have never come near Niall again if it was not for him. 

He had always been so terrified of losing someone again and now he had. He was never going to be able to see Matt the same way. It was destroyed. 

Not only did he have to lose Matt but Rae and Elliott's family was about to change for good. Zayn would not be able to forgive Matt for this. 

"I am so fucking sorry, I hope you believe that. I would go back and change it all if I could. I should have just spoken to Zayn about how I was feeling and then it would have all been so different. I just wanted you gone Niall, i didn't want you hurt. I didn't think it would get so messed up. I am so sorry. I love you Niall, i'm sorry." Niall is done. He is so fed up with hearing him say sorry when it is far too late for that. Sorry is not going to change anything. Sorry is not going to take away the hurt and betrayal they will all feel by this. Sorry will not make Niall forget everything that happened today. 

Niall get's up, bracing himself against the wall. He doesn't look at Matt as he walks past, leaving the kitchen and heading towards the door

"Are you going to tell him?" Matt rushes out of the kitchen following Niall, almost crashing into his back when Niall suddenly stops. He quickly steps back hands in the air like he thinks Niall is going to attack because he got to close. 

"No, you are going to tell him."

"I can't. Please don't make me tell him, he thinks it was Landon. He doesn't need to find out, this will kill him." Niall nods, walking the rest of the way to the front door pulling it open. It's pitch black outside now, street lights all gone out. Niall turns to face Matt. 

"It will. It will tear him apart and it's all your fault. Your going to tell him everything, you can be the one to watch his heart break. After all this your going to lose him anyway, it was all pointless. All this hurt is so pointless." 

"I didn't mean for it to be like this, I didn't want anyone hurt." Niall steps back until he is outside, cold night air tickling at his legs. 

"You keep saying that but it is not going to change the fact that you have, and it's going to hurt for a really long time for all of us. I'm sorry that you felt like you had to do all this to me Matt. I'm sorry that my friendship was not enough for you to know I would never take him away from you. Zayn has only ever wanted you and it was all for nothing. I hope you can live with that when your the one who is on their own. I just can't believe you of all people could be capable of something so cruel. I don't think I will ever be able to forgive you for this. We are done." Niall turns and walks away quickly. Matt had seen him cry enough for tonight he planned to shed the rest of his tears away from him.  

xxxxxxx

When he sneaks back into the house everyone is still fast asleep on the bed. Niall takes his jumper off and wiggles out of his bottoms before crawling onto the bed. He stops to look down at Zayn, face soft and peaceful in his sleep. He had no idea what was to come and that broke Niall;s  heart. He leans down to kiss his forehead, brushing some of his hair away from his face before climbing under the blanket and snuggling up to Harry. 

Harry shuffles in his sleep, arm wrapping around Niall's waist as he lets out a soft sigh. Like he had known in his sleep that Niall was gone. Niall brings Harry's hand up to his mouth, pressing his lips to Harry's ring. 

It was over. He just had to focus on that. It was horrible and there would be some more pain to come but the worst of it was over. He still had Harry. Landon had not gotten what he wanted and neither had Matt.

He still had Harry and he was going to marry him and raise kids with him and that is all that matters. 


	28. Chapter 28

Harry startles awake at 5am, top sticking to his back with sweat and heart hammering in his chest. Niall is asleep next to him, curled up tightly with his hands tucked up to his chest. Harry smooths his hand over Niall's face, under his chin then back up to his hair causing his face to twitch in his sleep.

Zayn is still at the end of the bed, also still asleep, right arm and leg dangling off onto the floor.

Liam is gone.

Harry throws the duvet off and get off the bed, straightening out his clothes as he stumbles toward the door.

He can hear noise coming from the spare room so he crosses the hallway and pushes the door open.

Liam is on his knees scrubbing at the carpet with a brush, a bucket of water and other cleaning supplies around him.

"Liam? What are you doing love?" Liam doesn't look up or even flinch at the sound of Harry voice. He just keeps scrubbing, body jolting back and forward with the motion. Harry can see his knuckles are white from how tight he is holding the brush, sweat dripping down his neck.

"There was food on the floor so I thought I better clean it up. I just want everything to feel clean and nice for Niall. I didn't want it to stain or start to smell too much and it looked like soup so it's going to smell right. Niall won't like that. I cleaned the rest of the room too. Stripped the bed, I threw the sheets away I hope that's alright. " Harry looks over to the bed, stripped bare with the mattress hanging over the side of the bed a little. How long had he been in here? 

"You don't need to do all this."

"I gave the carpet downstairs another clean too because I went down for a drink and I could still smell the sick a little. Might need another wash soon. The blood is going to be a problem, new carpet maybe.  And there were... there were some ties on the bed, yours I'm guessing because they where really ugly, they where broken anyway. Snapped. Half still tied to the bed. Niall's wrists will need another clean by the way. We have to take care of him dad." Liam's voice broke and Harry had his own tears welling up.

"It's OK. "

"Is it?" Liam finally stops, sitting back on his feet throwing the brush into the bucket, water splashing over the side. 

"Is it OK? We don't know what happened to him. In this room. I knew something was wrong, I fucking knew and I should have got here sooner. I left it so long dad. And Niall was here, tied up and going trough god knows what while I was looking at wedding photos and laughing and thinking that he was a dick head. We knew what Landon was doing. We all thought he was fucked up and after Niall and then we all just left him alone with him. I should have been here sooner. I could feel it. I knew. " Harry drops to his knees crawling over to Liam and tugging him onto his lap. Liam goes easily, body going limp in Harry's arm face tuning into his chest. 

"It's not your fault."

"It feels like it is. I feel so guilty." Harry blinks away his tears, holding Liam as tight as he can, hands clutching onto his arms. 

"I know. Me too. I should have made him leave. I could have dragged his arse out of here or I could have gone to the police but I was so worried about losing Niall that I made it easier for him to be hurt. I feel guilty too Liam but you don't have to because you had no way of knowing what was happening." Liam clings on to Harry's top, tears soaking the material. 

" But I did know. I felt it and I done nothing. I knew something was wrong. I could have be here and I could have helped him. I got here too late dad. It looked like....i think he was. " Liam cuts off with a sob. Harry bit down on his lip to hold back his own cry, leaning down to press his lips to Liam's head, hand rubbing up and down his back to try and give him some comfort. 

He didn't want to think of what could have happened to Niall yesterday but at the same time he wanted to know it all. Needed to know everything so he could handle everything the right way. 

"It OK love. Its OK. It's going to be OK." Harry screwed his eyes shut, no longer able to keep his tears at bay and hoped his words were true. 

Xxxxxxx

"Does that hurt?" Niall shakes his head, looking down at his wrist held gently in Harry's right hand as he cleans it with the other. 

"Want me to wrap them this time? I don't want them getting too dirty." Niall just shrugs his shoulders. Harry pauses watching Niall's face for a moment before reaching into the first aid kit for some bandages and scissors.   
"I'm going to wrap them." Niall's feels like it been a little strained between him and Harry since Liam and Zayn left this morning and he knows its all coming from him. 

Harry wants to know every detail of what happened last night, not that Niall can really blame him, but Niall just was not ready to talk yet. As soon as the words were out everything would change. He will know what Landon done to him and then he will know about Matt. 

He just wants things to stay the same for a little but longer before their family is blown apart. 

Niall watches as Harry gentle wraps his wrist up. They don't hurt that much anymore unless he brushes them up against something but Harry seemed pretty keen to do something to take care of him so he is letting him be.  

"When did Zayn say he was coming back?" Harry reaches across for the bandage tape ripping some off with his teeth.

"Not too sure, he has that appointment today remember?" Niall frowns, pulling his wrist back and out of Harry's hold. He had completely forgotten that today was when the social workers were coming over to see Zayn and Matt about Rae. As if Zayn didn't have enough to stress about without Niall adding all this on to the pile.

"You think it will go OK?"

"I don't see why not. They will see they are a happy stable family and accidents happen, not that is was an accident mind." Harry shoves the tape and left over roll of bandage back into the bag. "Did he say anything about that?" 

"I can't really remember." Niall looks away from Harry, sliding off the sink. There was so much he couldn't tell Harry without having to mention Matt. He felt bad for keeping so much from him when he was entitled to know the truth. He just needed a little bit longer. "He mostly just went on about me. He was going to take me somewhere, he had these two people who were going to come help. The same ones that broke into the pub and hurt Cassie. He said I was going to have to call you and tell you I was leaving you for him, that he would hurt someone if I didn't. So that you didn't come looking for me." Harry pulled Niall over to him, one hand sliding in the back of his hair and the other around his waist. Niall sunk into him, breathing in his smell. There was a point last night where he thought that Landon would win, that he would be taken away and Harry would never find him. It was the most terrifying part of the whole experience, believing for that moment he could lose Harry. 

"It would not have worked. Even if you had told me that I would have come for you. I would never just let you walk away from me, I would fight and never stop fighting until you were back with me. He would never have gotten you." Niall nods, feeling the familiar tightening to his throat and burning of his eyes he had been getting non stop today. He didn't try to stop himself from crying this time. Not now it was just him and Harry.

"Did he say what made him decide to do all this?" Niall steps back from Harry arms, using the back of his hand to wipe at his face. 

"I don't know. Can we just stop talking about it now please."

"I just want to know what happened Niall, I feel like you are keeping something from me." Niall lets out a sob, tugging the sleeve of his jumper down to cover his bandages up. 

"I just don't want to talk about it so just leave it please." Harry's shoulder slump, his mouth turning down and his eyes going sad. He turns away from Niall, breathing in trough his nose. 

"Ok, yeah we can leave it. Sorry." Niall gives him a small smile then leaves the bathroom. He will tell him soon and he will understand why it was so hard for him to say it all. 

xxxxxx

Niall stares at his phone Unknown caller flashing across the screen as he sips from his glass of water. It was going to be someone wasting him time and he really does not think he has the patience for that today. He can hear Harry upstairs banging around and has no idea what he could be doing, he was finding it best to stay clear of him for a bit to avoid being asked a million questions that he would have to pretend to not know about. 

He swipes across the screen putting the phone to his ear.

"Hello?" He can hear what sounds like traffic and some static but nobody talks. Just like he thought, a waste of his time. He sips his water again foot starting to tap on the floor. 

"Hello?"

"Hi Niall." Niall jolts, glass slipping from his hand and shattering on the floor, water splashing over his feet and legs. 

"Please don't hang up on me." Niall stumbles back, grabbing for the worktop to steady himself the room around him feeling like it was shrinking in around him. 

"I just want to talk." Niall drags himself over to the sink. He feels like he is going to be sick, throat going slick with bile. 

"What do you want Landon? There is nothing to talk about." He can hear Harry rushing down the stairs.

"I want to say sorry." 

"Sorry? You want to say sorry." Harry is behind him now stepping around the glass and holding onto him. 

"Yes I need to say sorry. I just love you so much Niall and I just know that we would have been so good together, if it had been different and if we got it right the first time. It would have been so good and I would have made you so happy. I thought I was giving myself a chance at that."

"A chance? You hurt me. What you done to me that was wrong and it was disgusting and you can't just say sorry for that. You make me sick." Niall voice breaks, tears spilling over as he holds onto the sink tighter, lips parted as he takes deeps breaths to try and stay calm. He does not want Landon to break him. 

"I know I will never get your forgiveness Niall but I still want you to know I am so sorry. And Matt, he is good." Niall closes his eyes, legs giving way. Harry catches him and lowers him to the floor. "He is so good and I used him and manipulated him, most of it was me. I know he means a lot to you, to all of you. He cares for you Niall and his love for Zayn goes beyond anything." Niall lets out a sob. Harry reaches for the phone but Niall just turns away from him crawling away from him.

"That does not make it OK."

"I know baby-"

"Don't call me that."

"I'm sorry. I'm leaving alright. I am going back home and I will never come back here ever again and I wont ever try to contact you again. It's over for good." Niall turns back to face Harry tucking his knees up to his chest. Harry looks like he is fuming, eyes on the phone in Niall's hand. 

"And Niall, you cant go to the police OK. You can't tell them what I done because if you do then I will take Matt with me yeah. I will take him away from his kids. Not just him, I could take Harry and Zayn too, after what they done to me."

"What did they do to you?" Harry's eye widen and Landon laughs on the phone before letting out a pained groan. 

"You will have to ask them that but you definitely got lucky with them because they really are willing to kill for you. Goodbye Niall, I love you and I will always want you." Landon hangs up and Niall slowly lowers his phone down to his lap. 

"He is leaving. It's over, we wont have to deal with him again." It should be a relief but how can it be when the other half of the problem was still here. Zayn was with him right now probably getting comfort from him as they talk with some stranger about their family. 

After everything that had happened the worse was still to come. 

"That's good right?"

"What did you do to him? He said that if I go to the police then he could take you and Zayn with him so what did you do." Harry sits back on his feet letting out a sigh, shoulders slumping. 

"I will show you." Harry gets up holding his hand out for Niall to help him get to his feet. Niall lets his phone clatter to the floor and follows Harry into the living room. 

"When Macy called me to say you were in trouble with Landon I knew it was going to be really bad." Harry goes over to the TV unit crouching down and reaching behind the DVD player. "So I grabbed this." He straightens up and holds his hands out. Niall looks down at the knife in his hand, the blade covered in dried blood. Niall looks over to the blood stain on the carpet.

"I forgot I had it. When I came in you were all I could think about, it was in the pocket of my jumper." 

"You stabbed him?" Niall looks up from the knife Harry shakes his head placing the knife down by the TV. It was small, one Cassie most likely used to chop vegetables with. He can't really imagine Harry bring able to use something in such a way. 

"Zayn stabbed him." Niall lets out a breath, sitting down on the sofa. Zayn stabbed Landon.

"He was still on the floor, I was over him and I was hitting him, that's where most of the blood come from I think I must have like really fucked his face up but it was all such a blur and I was so angry I could barely fucking see. Zayn saw the knife in my pocket and he just grabbed it and shoved it into his side. I didn't get a change to stop him." 

"Oh god." Niall falls back, hands covering his face. 

"I pulled the knife out and Zayn pressed down on the... on the wound because it was  bleeding a lot but Landon pushed him away and he managed to get up and he just left. Until he just called I had not idea if he was even alive. Niall I am so sorry I let it happen. We should have just thrown him out and not done anything that could have got us in trouble, i am sorry if this just makes you feel worse." Niall gets up rushing over to Harry, arms flying around his waist as he hugs him. 

"Don't be sorry, its fine and you wont get in trouble. I love you so much, thank you." Harry hugs him back, face pressing into the top of his head. 

"Your not angry that we hurt him?" Niall curls his fist into Harry top, feeling like his heart was in his throat. He took a few breaths, hiding his face in Harry's arms as he spoke. 

"He raped me Harry. He raped me." They both fall to the floor, crying and holding on to each other as tight as they can. 

"It's over now and I'm going to take care of you. I am so sorry for leaving you with him, I am so fucking sorry for leaving. My poor baby boy."

"I don't want it all to change. Please don't look at me differently." 

"I would never. It happened and we are going to deal with this together, nothing will change the way I feel about you. He didn't win Niall because nothing is going to change. I love you." 

"I love you too." 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Bobby and Lisa arrive just after lunchtime, Bobby dragging Niall into his arms as soon as his eyes land on him. 

River is next, with a sleeping Nolan in his pushchair. They all pile onto the sofa, Niall cuddled up to his dads side with his head tucked into his shoulder, Lisa sat with his feet on her lap. They talk about everything but Landon and it's exactly what Niall needed to lift his sprites a little.

Louis and Cassie turn up half an hour later, Louis practically slamming Niall to the floor as he runs up to him. Cassie is a lot more calmer and Niall cries as soon as he see's her bruised up face. Harry rushes round playing host, which Niall thinks is his way of coping with things at the moment, while everyone talks to Cassie and Lou about what is going on at the pub. 

"There was not actually that much damage once we had cleaned up, just some broken chairs and tables which my insurance will cover. They didn't go upstairs so at least our personal things are safe." 

Liam and Macy come in followed closely by Zayn and the kids. 

"Hey, Matt said he could not make it over because of work stuff so sorry about that."

"Its fine. How did the meeting go?" Zayn smiles, hand pushing trough Rae's hair.

"It was good actually, we got a bit of a talking to about safe storage of medication but they mostly just talked about how happy she seemed." Niall felt a small weight lift of his shoulders, he was so glad Zayn no longer had that to worry about. 

"Harry told me what happened." Niall lowers his voice. "I hope your not stressing about it, he is not going to the police and he deserved it." Zayn nods once patting Niall's shoulder before walking off to greet everyone else. 

 Niall scoops both the kids up, squeezing his face between theirs, Macy leaning over them to kiss Niall's nose. 

"You OK love?"

"Yeah, i'm good." She looks emotional, eyes watering as she looks back at Niall.

"I'm sorry, Liam kept wanting to come over and I told him to leave it. If I had known." Niall gives her a smile, placing the kids back on his feet so he can hug her next. 

"Don't be sorry. I don't want any of ya feeling bad." Niall users Macy to go sit down, grabbing Harry as he goes to rush back to the kitchen and forcing him to sit too. Liam hoovers so Niall takes his hand, placing a kiss on it before yanking him to the floor. 

They all bundle as close as they can, Lisa swotting at Louis butt as he gets settled on the floor in front of her. 

"Madame please keep your hands to yourself." Bobby laughs, making room for Niall to get back next to him while Harry curls up by Niall's feet, arms wrapping around his knees. 

"Zayn your arse is on my foot."

"Whatever Lou! You love my arse on your foot."

"I would love your arse on something but not my foot."

"That's gross."

"Your face is gross."

"You do realise your nearly forty right?"

"You do realise I don't give a shit right?"

Harry looks up at Niall and rolls his eyes. 

It still does not feel right. Not while he knows what he does, but it is  the closest thing he has had to normal for a while now. Even if he is going to see it all blow apart soon. 

xxxxxx

It's late when everyone leave and Niall and Harry are once again sat in the bathroom together while Harry cleans his wrist.

"You are being overprotective." Harry raises his eyebrow at him.

"Well it helps me. Just be thankful i'm not doing a full body wrap right now cause I feel like it. Keep you all safe and protected." Niall chuckles, playfully kicking at Harry's legs. 

"I like you taking care of me. You're adorable." 

"So are you, we must be like the most adorable couple ever. We should have a medal." Niall snort, leaning back into the mirror. Harry finishes up with his wrist, placing his hands onto Niall lap before leaning over between his legs to kiss him. Niall kisses back, parting his lips to let him slip his tongue in before he pulls back and moves to his neck. Niall closes his eyes, enjoying the feel of Harry mouth on him, its a comfort. 

"How?" Niall goes stiff and he is so glad that he is not looking right at Harry right now. Harry runs his hands up and down his side, trying to soothe him. Niall lets it. He lets his body relax under Harry's touch because he knows he is safe. Landon will never come back and he did not take him away from Harry. Nothing will make Harry see him differently, he said so himself. He was safe. 

"My mouth." Harry's head drops forward, banging against the class. 

"Fucking arsehole." He growls out the words, hands tightening on Niall's side before loosening and dropping. He stand up straight again rubbing at his face before grinning at Niall. It's fake but Niall will take it, thankful that Harry is not pushing him to talk more about it. 

"Right OK. Lets go to bed should we? I plan on cuddling you all night." Niall smiles letting Harry tug him down to his feet then lets out a yelp as he lifts him back up again and carries him to their bedroom. 


	29. Chapter 29

The next few days pass in a blur for Niall and he found himself suddenly unable to get out of bed in the mornings . Harry had been really sweet, buzzing around the room trying to motivate Niall to get up and keeping the room fresh for him by changing the sheets and opening the windows. He would give up quickly though when Niall didn't reply to anything he said and just blinked back at him and instead went about making him endless cups of tea that went cold and food that ended up in the bin. 

Liam came by a couple of times a day, tucking himself into bed next to Niall and talking to him about his day as he stroked his hands trough his greasy hair. Zayn would come too when the kids were at school but it just reminded Niall of why he was so sad in the first place. 

He felt bad. He knew laying here like this was just adding more worry on Harry but he just felt so sad all the time and couldn't find the energy to get out of bed. 

Every time Zayn walked in the room Niall expected him to know and it was weighing Niall down so much. He didn't want to be the one to tell him. Not just because he did not want to see the look on Zayn's face when he found out what his own husband had done to him and Niall but because it would be better coming from Matt. It had to come from him. So Niall just had to wait with no idea when it was all going to end. 

He had missed the official release date of his book. His phone had rang none stop with calls from Sonya and Maggie until Harry eventually answered for him, leaving the room so he could tell them everything that had happened. A ridiculously large bunch of flowers arrived the next day and although Niall did not really react to them as Harry placed them down on the bedside table they did add a bit of cheer to the room. 

On the release day of his last book him and Harry had walked to the shops together to buy a copy and then sat down at the park to have a picnic as Niall read it out to Harry. They had planned to do the same this time, to make it a tradition. Instead Niall just rolled over and closed his eyes hoping to fall back to sleep when Harry reminded him what the day was. 

Bobby and Lisa came to see him too. Both sitting at the end of the bed and chatted to each other as Niall just listened. 

He felt numb all day everything playing on a loop on his head and the thought of everyone finding out about Matt pushing down on his chest until he is gasping for breath and Harry is rushing into the room to help calm him down. 

Night time is worse. When Harry climbs into bed and wraps his arms around him and suddenly Niall feels it all and he spends half the night sobbing into Harry's chest as he replays the night in his head. Can remember too well the feeling and the taste of Landon forcing himself on him. The way he looked down at him after like he had done something so good for him. 

You used to love doing this so much. 

You are so good to me. 

The more time he has to think about it the harder it is to accept and understand. 

How was that his Landon. 

The one that used to patiently teach him.  
The one who laughed with him and held him and made him feel safe. 

The one who had been sweet and gentle. Who only wanted Niall to be happy and safe. 

How he he become such a monster?

Was it all because of Niall?   
Had he really taken someone so kind and turned them into that? 

The only comfort he can find is knowing that Landon won't go out and hurt someone else. It was only Niall he wanted. 

When Niall finally drags himself out of bed he is shocked to find that two weeks have passed. Harry makes him some toast watching him closely as he slowly eats it. He has a bath next, Harry kneeling on the floor to help wash him, bending down to kiss the tip of is nose every second until Niall's mouth his curving up into a smile. 

"I really love you." Harry grins dunking his hand under the water to hold Niall's.

"I love you too. You can talk to me about anything."

"I know. I just need a bit more time." Harry lets it drop without a fuss getting Niall a clean warm towel to wrap himself in once he has stepped out the bath. 

Niall let's Harry dry him and dress him, knowing he was enjoying taking care of him still and not wanting to ruin his excitement that he was actually out of bed and functioning like a normal person for a bit. 

"What would you like to do today? We can just snuggle and watch films or we can go get some fresh air." Niall thinks about it as Harry stripes the bed down, throwing the sheet into the corner of the room to wash later. Niall gets his phone off the side, stopping to smell his flowers before unlocking the screen. 

He has too many messages to even think about right now and settles for just opening up his twitter. 

His notifications are packed with mentions of his book. 

"Number three." Niall holds his phone up on the Sunday Times page. Harry smiles and nods. 

"Yeah I know, Sonya thinks it will get to two, possible one. It's doing really well babe, i'm so proud of you." Niall locks his phone screen making a mental note to go back online later and reply to some of the messages. 

Niall can remember the feeling he got when his first book reached number two in the Sunday Times book chart. It was probably the best feeling he has ever had in his life. He got the same feeling when his seconds book reached number one and then again for his third. His fourth was the most special because he had everyone around him that mattered the most. This time he still feels nothing. This numbness that he is stating to think might never go. He throws his phone onto the bed tugging at the baggy black jumper Harry had yanked over his head. 

"I think I would like to go see my mum. See if my dad wants to go with me, if that is OK with you?" Harry looks a little disappointing but he quickly hides it. 

xxxxxxxxx

"This would never have happened if she was still here. She always knew how to take care of you." Niall turns his head on his dad's lap to look at his mums grave stone.

Wetness is seeping into the bottom of his shirt and his jeans from the grass so it must be doing the same to his dad. He still doesn't want to move.

It's nice laying here on his dad's lap like he is a little boy again, with his mum by his side.

"I'm not so sure. He was charming."

"She would have seen right through that your mum. Would have had him running that's for sure. She must be so annoyed at me." Niall reaches out to rest his hand on the grave, fingers spreading trough the grass.

"You know, when you told her you liked boys she started worrying so much. She said she worried about girls breaking your heart but she thought boys could do so much worse. She was of the opinion that boys are meaner then girls when it comes to matters of the heart. She would have been watching him like a hawk. What was I doing? Swanning around Paris."

"Dad you can't seriously think it would have been different if you were home. You know Landon the same way I did, he was different before. You would have had no reason to think he was capable. Anyway I was a complete sucker for him. I wouldn't even listen to Harry. I was stupid and it's all my own fault. " His dad's finger comb through his hair. 

"I don't think stupid is the word I would use. Kind, too kind for you own good sometimes. It's like you said though init, the Landon you knew would not have thought to do something like this. You had no reason to think it was all true." Niall let's out a sigh turning back to face his dad. 

He looked tired, older. He worried that Bobby was not sleeping, up worrying and feeling guilty about him. His dad had not even been home when Landon first arrived, and it's not like they were off having some kind of jolly. His dad has just wanted to cheer Lisa up around the anniversary of her sons death.   
Niall was an adult. He had no reason to not have gone away. 

"Please don't blame yourself dad. You didn't know what would happen, I'm glad you and Lisa went away. She enjoyed it yeah?" 

"Oh god yes she did. The bloody woman was getting excited over every bloody thing. Your mother was like that when travelling, its why she was so keen for you to go off and experience it. I was very surprised when she asked for a burial. I thought for sure she would want to be scattered is some random location of a place I had never heard of before." Niall laughs, bringing his legs up feeling the material of his trousers stick wetly to his legs. 

His dad had always looked baffled when Niall and his mum were reading off names of places he should go visit. As far as Bobby was concerned there was Mullingar and there was London. It was a miracle he had been anywhere else.

"She wanted to be here didn't she. For all of us to come talk to and stuff. Well apart from Greg cause he is a penis." Bobby stops stroking at Niall's hair to slap him across the forehead. 

"Ouch!" 

"Speak nicely of your brother. He has been worried about you."

"I wish you would stop telling him about me. Like a pair of gossiping old ladies." 

"Well ya don't talk to him do ya. So I have to fill him in." 

"Excuse me. I don't talk to him? He pissed off and called me what three times before giving up. He can get stuffed." 

"You're going to kill me Niall." Niall snorts grabbing his hand and placing it back on his head. 

"Guilt trips don't work on me. Tell Greg I'm fine. And I said hi. Or like whatever." They fall into silence again, listening to the sound of traffic and the birds. Niall twirls some grass round his finger until it snaps then moves on to another blade. 

"You and Harry OK?" 

"Yeah. It's been rough the past few weeks, again my fault, but I think it will start looking up now."

"Maybe you will have that baby soon hey. Make me a Grandad, what do you think about that my love me a Grandad and you a Granny." Niall smiles patting the ground. God would his mum have doted on his kids. 

Never would he have thought he would be raising them without her love and guidance. 

"Hopefully. I am so ready to be a dad. Poop and sick and no sleep, bring it all on." Bobby chuckles and gives him that look that all parents seem to give Niall when he talks about how excited he is. Like they all have this dark secret and think Niall will end up hating it. 

He was sure he had seen it all between Rae, Elliott and Nolan though and he honestly could not wait. He wants the bad and the good. The whole package please. 

"You will be good son. I can't wait to see you and Harry be parents together. How weird is it that your kids will be Liam's siblings." Niall rolls his eyes and tuts. 

"Weirder then me being his step dad when I get married?" Bobby's had pauses in Niall's hair. 

"That's just funny. You had sleepovers with your future step son and had no idea."

"Shut up."

Xxxxxxxx

After stopping by his dads house for some lunch with him and Lisa, Niall goes home and settles down with his laptop to start replying to some of his fans on Twitter. It makes him feel a little more normal to be doing something productive so he ends up sending of some work emails and texting Sonya about some changes to his schedule over the next few month. 

He was looking online at some idea of what to get Louis for his birthday when Zayn arrived looking shocked to see Niall on the sofa and not in bed. 

"Hey. This is nice." He hangs over the back of the sofa to give Niall a hug and kiss his cheeks that mostly hits the corner of his lips and leaves a wet mess that Niall wipes away with a frown.

"What ya looking at?" He asks as he hops over landing next to Niall in a heap.

"Louis' birthday. What you getting him?" 

"I dunno. Matt will sort something out, I will just look extra cute for him and flirt with him a little."Niall goes stiff at the mention of Matt, which goes unnoticed by Zayn. 

Niall felt a sudden bubble of anger. Two weeks. Matt had left it two weeks.   
Did he know Niall had shut himself away, that he had gone to a such a dark place that he could barely function. Used it to his advantage to keep living a normal life. Maybe he thought Niall was so miserable he had forgotten about it. 

It had been all Niall could think about. 

He looks next to him at Zayn. He looked good. A glow to his skin and a shine to his eyes. His hair was unstyled today, laying messily around his face making him look younger. 

He was so happy. 

"I love you Z." Zayn looks up from Nialls laptop screen, hand curling around Niall wrist lifting his hand up to place a small kiss to his knuckles. 

"I love you too." he says it differently and somtimes Niall wishes his own words held the same meaning as Zayns. 

Not that he wanted to love Zayn the same way as he loved Harry. The same way Zayn loved him. But it would make him feel less guilty. 

"I have some good news by the way. Been wanting to tell you for ages but after everything I thought it best to wait." Niall moves his laptop onto the coffee table, shuffling around on the sofa until he is facing Zayn with his legs curls in front of him. 

"OK, I could do with some good news." Zayn take Niall hands again, thumbs running a circle over the skin. 

"About a month ago me, Matt and the kids went to this open day at a Foster home in Essex." Niall can feel the weight pushing back down on him. He already knows what Zayn is going to say and he wants to untangle their hands and cover his mouth so he can't say the words. Instead he forces the smile to stay on his face and he holds Zayn's hands tighter. 

"We didn't really have it planned because we had already decided on adopting a baby. We wanted to do it from the start like we did with El, but there was this boy and we just fell in love with him." Niall blinks back his tears, throat and nose burning as he desperately tried not to cry. 

"His name is Sam and he is eight years old. He has downs syndrome and I don't think they thought he would ever get adopted because they seemed a little shocked when we asked to spend more time with him." He can't do this. He can't sit and listen to Zayn talk about the next addition to their family when he knows its all going to fall apart for him soon. That there probably won't be a time where Zayn brings Sam home. This poor child who would be so loved and cared for with Zayn as his parent. 

"We're going to adopt him. We have some supervised visits set up then a couple of overnight stays and then if it goes well and after we have had some training we get to have him home permently. The kids love him already and I really love him already Niall. He is just so sweet and funny, he is going to fit into the group so well, it's like he was made for us." Niall pulls his hands out of Zayns, standing up from the sofa his legs shaking as he steps away from Zayn. 

"That's umm, that's good." Zayn looks disappointed. He had been waiting to tell Niall, had probably imagined them getting excited together and Niall asking a million questions. That's how it would have been. Niall would have been so excited for him and so proud for giving a little boy a loving home when a lot of people would have turned their backs on him. 

How can he pretend to be excited when it's going to come to a heartbreaking end. He would have been so loved not just by Zayn but by them all. If Matt had just done the right thing, gone to Niall or Zayn to talk then it would have all been different and Zayn would be getting the family he thought he was. 

"Look Ni, I know you're finding it hard waiting to hear from the agency and I know that taking on a child like Sam is going to be a little harder then normal, but you are happy for me right?" Niall nods, still backing away from Zayn and towards the stairs. He can feel the pull of his bed again. Wants to get back under the covers and hide away from it all. 

"Course I am. Do you mind leaving?" Zayn's face drops but then Niall is spinning around and running up the stairs, tears pouring down his face before he has even slammed the door shut to the bedroom and dived into the bed. 

Zayn does not come up to see if he is ok or to find out what is going on so Niall knows he must have really hurt his feelings. He hears the front door close loudly minutes after he has closed his eyes and he lets himself cry loudly, clinging tightly onto the pillowcase and curling his knees up to his chest as he heaved and sobbed.  

Harry is home not long after, while Niall is still crying, so Zayn must have called him. 

He throws his stuff onto the floor and climbs in next to Niall pulling him in. 

"Baby, what happened? What are you not telling me?"

"I can't say it Harry, not yet. I just can't." It's not the right time. If Niall tells Harry then Harry will go after Matt and there is nothing Niall could do to stop him. That is not how Zayn should find out, after Harry has barged into his home and done god knows what to Matt. Niall had to find the right time for all of them so they could all deal with it they way they would need to. 

"Why not? It's me, you can tell me anything."

"No this. Just please give me time, i'm not ready for it to change yet." Harry sighs, burying his nose into Niall's hair. 

"But you are already letting it change things love. Look at you, this is not how it normally is. I am really worried about you, I just want to know if you are going to be OK." Niall sniffs, wiping at his face with the blanket. 

He will probably be ok one day. When all the hurt has faded and they have all learnt to live without feeling like there is a missing piece. When Niall can look at Zayn and not feel the guilt rip at him. When he is not waking in the night feeling like he is choking, like everything is just about to slip out of his grasp. 

"I will be, we all will be. It's just going to get so much worse. I don't want that for all of you yet. Just need more time." Harry holds him closer, hand slipping under Niall's top. His fingers are cold from being outside but it feels nice on his skin that had grown clammy under the blanket and his layers of clothes. 

"I will give you whatever you need sweet boy." Niall closes his eyes relaxing back into Harry's body. He smells like apples and school and home. 

That's how Zayn feels around Matt. 

He feels and looks and smells like home to him. 

And he was going to lose it. 

Niall starts crying again. Feeling the grief that Zayn was yet to feel, but this time he had Harry to hold him and kiss him and whisper sweet, calming things in his ear and somehow he manages to drift off to sleep with a small smile on his face as Harry kissed at his cheek. 


	30. chapter 30

Niall has a problem. One that he deems rather big. So he goes to the person he always goes to for the big stuff.  
Liam.

Unfortunately Liam is the busiest member of the group but Niall is desperate so he dresses in somthing other then pyjamers for the first time in two weeks, but leaves his hair, and walks out the front door.

By the time he reaches Liam's workplace, bag of takeaway sandwiches swinging in his hand, he feels like jumping out of his skin with every person that looks at him.

It's like they know as their eyes skim over him. Knows the disgusting thing he had to do. Knows the secret he is keeping from everyone.

The receptionist knows him so he manages to get passed the lobby and into the elevator quickly and without having to stop and talk to anyone. There is one other person riding with him but she seems more interested in her phone then Niall. Thank god.

The floor Liam works on has another receptionist and a never ending line of offices.

Again he know the receptionist so she lets him passed without a word, hair twirling around her finger as she starts to talk to the woman who stepped off with Niall.

Liam is on the phone when Niall let's himself into his office dumping the bag on the table, on top of what could be important papers.

A picture of Liam, Niall and Harry sits by the phone, next to one of Macy.

The other side of the desk there is a picture of Louis face in a love heart frame he got Liam as a joke but Liam kept anyway.

Liam is winding up the phone call so Niall start unloading the sandwiches and two strawberry milkshakes and sets them out on a couple of napkins throwing the bag in the bin.

Liam hangs up rubbing tiredly at his face and loosening his tie.

Niall often wonders if Liam actually enjoys his job or if he just likes the paycheck at the end of the month.

"I have had such a shit morning so thanks for this." He motions to the food before picking up his sandwich, loaded with meat and salad, and takes a large bite moaning as he starts the chew.

"I can't get an erection." Niall sits back and waits for Liam to stop choking on his food. He eventually manages to swollow, hand fisted over his mouth as he clears his throat.

"That's... Right... OK. Shit." Niall swipes his milkshake off the table popping the straw into his mouth.

"How ummm... You sure, like you tried everything?" Niall chews on the end of his straw before letting it pop out his mouth.

"This morning so far I have had fingers up my arse, a mouth around my dick, the most awkward hand job of my life, I've watched porn, your dad has done some questionable things with his tounge and there has been sex toys Liam , more then I knew we had." Liam makes a sound thats a mix between a gag and a sqwark.

"That's definitely some effort. I can totally handle this conversation. You didn't get hard at all?"

"Not even a twitch." Liam blows out air from between his lips, elbows resting on the desk as he stares across at Niall in disbelif.

"I'm going to traumatise myself but I have to ask, the thing with the tounge" Niall uses his fingers to make a circle in front of his mouth, Liam's eyes widening as Niall shows him.

"Oh my god. Holy shit, that's my Dad. Do you think the would work on girls?"

"Can we focus on me and my broken dick please." Liam picks his sandwich up again but stops just as he is about to take a bite then drops it in the bin.

"That cost me money."

"You just showed me what my dad does to your butt with his actual mouth and you expect me to eat?"

"Well you asked. Come on Liam." Niall whines dropping his head onto the desk. "Help me work out how to get my dick to go hard."

"Niall, mate." Liam gets up the chair squeaking as he pushed it back and rounded his desk to kneel down in front of Niall.   
"This is a really stressful time for you. You're still dealing with everything you went thought and you are doing most of it on your own for some reason. It's going to have an effect. You probably just need to give yourself a bit more time. Everyone struggles to get in the mood when they are going through a bad time." He looks everywhere but Liam , fingers picking at the bread of his sandwich.

The morning had started of really good with Harry.   
He had managed to sort it out that he would not have to go back to work for the rest of the week and they had a lazy breakfast in bed followed by a bath together.

Niall still felt weighed down by everything, stressed like Liam said, but things between him and Harry felt normal and they where finally getting time alone in their home.

They were watching a film when things started to get heated. Niall had felt it building all morning. Lingering touches and dark looks from Harry.

He felt fine with it to begin with. He wanted Harry's hands on him and he wanted the deep dirty kisses.

He felt on the edge of being turned on but he just could not get there.

Harry had been fine about it of course and had been patient with Niall as he asked Harry to keep trying. Then he had been really sweet when Niall finally gave up, sweaty and frustrated after two hours of trying to get himself hard for Harry.

Harry had gone for a shower to cool down, feeling too bad to get himself off, and Niall had cried before sneaking out the house to come see Liam.

"It's just that Harry keeps telling me that Landon didn't win, he didn't take me away from him. Maybe he did." Liam sighs, hands curling to tuck under Nialls knees.

"Ni, this is not going to effect you and dad. I'm sure it's just temporary and even if it wasn't do you think he would let it change anything. He's not with you for sex, he loves you."

"But it is a part of who we are, we really enjoy sex and it makes us feel closer."

"Then you would both find something else that does that for you. Landon didn't win just because you can't get your dick up Niall. Does your dick even need to be hard for him to fuck you? Benefit of liking it up the bum right?" Niall chuckles pushing Liam away from him.

"Not the point idiot. I'm not even getting turned on Li, there is no way he would have sex with me if I'm not fully into it." Liam sits down on his bum, cheek resting on Nialls leg, eyebrows pinched together as he looks sympathetically up at Niall.

"Maybe you should talk to someone. Actually not someone, you should talk to dad. We can all tell you're holding something big back, maybe if you just let it all out then things might start to get better. You can't do this alone, you need to let yourself deal with it so you can start to heal." Niall slides of the chair to sit cross legged on front of Liam their knees pressed together.

"I can't remember if I thanked you for getting to me that night. Things would have been a lot different right now if you hadn't got there when you did."

"Really? Because to be honest I feel like I was already too late. I should have been there a lot sooner." Niall takes his hands tugging him closer, until their foreheads are nearly touching.

"He was about to make me have sex with him, you got there on time Liam I promise."

"What happened when he had you tied up? I know somthing happened." He would have to tell everyone soon. He knows he can keep it to himself if he really wanted to but they are his family and he can't keep somthing that big from them forever. When he was ready he will sit them all down and tell them about that and about Matt.

"It did, but I'm not ready for that yet. I'm going to be OK though, I have been telling Harry stuff. I'm not completely alone in this." Liam pulls Niall in for a hug, cradling his head against his chest, his other hand curling into his jumper.

"I'm so sorry I didn't come see you. I'm sorry we made it so easy for him."

"Oh Liam please don't think like that. He would have done it eventually no matter what you guys did. I'm the one who made it easy for him by pushing you all away and sticking up for him. You can't blame yourself, none of you can. You got to me liam, you saved me." Liam curled himself around Niall more, the slight shake to his shoulders the only sign that he was crying.

Xxxxxxxx

"There is a slight chance its working." Harry huffed, face red and hair sticking to his face. He looked like Nialls darkest fantasy had stepped right out of his head and laid out on the bed for him. Normally seeing Harry like this would have him begging to be fucked.

"I can't do it for much longer without coming so yay." Niall lazily fist at his dick, which gives an equally lazy twitch. He keeps his eyes on Harry fingers knuckle deep in his own arse.

Harry must brush against his prostate again because he let's out a low moan, stomach muscle tightening as he arches off the bed.

Niall leanes over him, free hand pressed into the mattress by his waist.

"Your hand." He can feels himself hardening slightly as Harrys hand replaces his, gripping tighter and tugging faster.

It's not that he means to think of Landon, and it only seems to be when Harry touches him that the thought really flys to the front of his head. Suddenly his throat feels full in the worse way possible.

You're so good to me

"Stop, fuck can we stop." Niall falls onto his back, squeezing his eyes shut so he doesn't have to see Harry pull his fingers out of himself or how hard and sore his dick looks as Harry once again ignores his needs because of Niall.

"Baby it's OK. We should just stop for today, its not that important right now." It is though, because if Niall could just get hard and stay hard and be able to have sex with his fiance then it means Landon took nothing from them.

"I want to be able to make love to you." His voice is choked with emotion. Harry reaches out for him but Niall avoids his touch and rolls off the bed to start tugging his clothes back on.

"Don't leave again."

"I'm not. I'm just going to give you some time do sort yourself out."

"I don't want to." Harry sits up as Niall walks towards the door. He looks so lost.

"You do, and its fine. How about I order us some food in. You go have a shower so you can sort that out." Niall points to Harry still hard dick. "Enjoy for both of us yeah? Want to see you looking all cuddly and satisfied." Harry gets up off the bed, keeping hold of the blanket to cover himself up, like he is ashamed.

"Niall it really doesn't matter, you know that don't you? It wouldn't matter to me if it never happens again. Not that I'm saying it won't because it probably will."

"Its fine Harry." Niall cuts of Harry's rambling with a smile.   
"I love you, I'm going to go order the food." Harry gives him a tight smile in return as Niall walks out of the room.

Niall orders the food then lays down on the sofa texting back and forward with Sonya and River. The shower runs for quite a while so Niall knows that if harry did get himself off he struggled to get there.

He does look satisfied when he come down though, cheeks rosey and skin all soft as he flops down on top of Niall, wet hair spreading over his face.

"You smell nice."

"Used your stuff. What food did you order?"

"Chinese. Enjoyable shower?" Harry reaches for the TV control, elbow digging into Niall's stomach.

"It was alright." Niall kisses the top of his head, moisture from his hair wetting his lips.

"Just so you know its not you. I love you so much and I find you really sexy." Harry tilts his head back to meet Nialls eyes.

"I know that, it's just a rough time. We will get passed it I just want you to take as much time as you need, no pressure. We will just let it happen naturally, no pushing it." Niall sighs settling back into the sofa as Harry flicks trough Netflix to find somthing to watch.

Xxxxxx

Louis and cassie come over later in the evening, followed by Bobby and Lisa to watch Louis and Cassie's wedding video.

Niall gets up off the sofa and steals Louis packet of cigarette and lighter after he has watched a clip of Matt and Zayn slow dancing for way to long.

Its cold when he steps outside but he can't deal with walking back through the living room to grab his coat with the video still playing.

The wedding was the last time Niall had felt like things had been normal but the whole time Matt knew what was about to happen. Now he knew Landon had been there, that Matt had probably lead him to his and Harry's hotel room to go through his things.

Niall pulls a cigarette out and places it loosely between his lips as he cups his hand around the end and lights it. Feeling himself relax already as smoke drifts up and swirls around him.

He is not left alone for long before the back door opens and Louis steps out wrapped up in his coat with Nialls hanging in his hand. Niall takes it from him tugging it on.

"Well need a fag." Niall slides the pack over to him watching as he got one and lit up.

They smoke in silence for a while, shoulders pressed together the sound of laughter from inside occasionally drifting through the door.

"Harry told me." Niall just nods, flicking some ash to the floor. He thought there was a chance Harry had talked to Louis about everything. It's was part of the package with Harry really. You told him somthing then Louis knew too.

"I'm really sorry you had to go through that. Wish I got a chance to get my hands on him again."

"Yeah well." Its not the worse thing he thinks. They go back to silence as they both finish of their cigarettes, Louis watching Niall the whole time.

"You need to talk to him. You're keeping stuff to yourself and its going to mess with your head. You can trust him with anything and there is nothing you can tell him that will change the way he thinks about you. If there was somthing else he made you do, or something that was said then it won't matter Niall." Niall laughs, dragging his hand over his face.

"It's not our relationship I'm worried about changing. It's everything Lou. It's all of you. You don't even understand how messed up its all about to become. Everything that has happened is nothing compared to this. And it really fucking hurts and I'm scared that once it's out there it will just hurt more."   
Louis pulls him in for a hug that smells like smoke and the pub and it does a surprisingly good job of making Niall's shoulders relax a little.

"Please try and talk to him. You are starting to worry us all by shutting yourself away. Whatever it is we will deal with it together and we will be fine. We are strong Niall, let us deal with this with you. Or at least just tell Harry as much as you can. Don't keep this to yourself and let it destroy you. You and Harry are a team, bring him in on this." Niall bumps his forehead against Louis shoulder as a thanks.

"How's Cassie been?"

"Not too bad. A few nightmares here and there but mostly she has been worried about you like the rest of us. Been weird not having you about as much." He didn't actually take a moment to think about how the others would be feeling about him shutting himself away for so long.

Two weeks was a long time for him to not go see River and Nolan and he had probably missed some stuff.  
And he had no idea what Matt had been saying to Zayn, if he was finding a way to make it seem like Niall was lying when it all finally comes out.

Was that why he wanted to adopt Sam with Zayn? Did he think Niall would keep his mouth shut if they where making their family bigger.

He had to say something soon and the first step is opening up to Harry more.

"We should get back in." Louis follows Niall in, locking the back door behind him before bouncing past Niall to jump onto the only available space left on the sofa between Bobby and Harry.

Niall passes them all saying he needs the loo before heading up the stairs.

He passes the bathroom, stopping when he is outside the spare room.

This was his favorite place when he was younger. His and Liam space to just be themelseves and talk about crushes and sex and just be teenage boys.  
Then it had been his room for a while, his safe place after his mum had died. Where he had been when he fell in love with harry.  
Then Nolans first bedroom, where Niall would peak in and see River curled up with a smile on her face as she nursed him.

He pushed the door open, leaving the light off and using the glow from the hallway to look around.

It wasn't any of them things anymore.

It was clean and tidy, the bed stripped and left bare. No sign of anything bad happening.

Niall could still see it all. Could still see Landon sat in the chair looking at him.

Can see himself on the bed. Tied up, weak, scared. Raped.

He crouches down hanging his head as he takes a few deep breaths.

It smells strongly of carpet cleaner and he wonders who took it upon themselves to come in here and clean it all away. 

He stands back up again walking closer to the bed, hands skimming over the frame.

"What are you doing in here sweetheart?" Niall takes his hand off the bed to shove them in his pockets. Lisa comes up behind him hand pressing into his back.

"Taking steps." He moved back a bit so he could put his arm around her waist.

"You kids never make any sense to me." Niall chuckled kissing her temple.

"Sorry. This is the first time I have been in here since that night. So it's like a step towards whatever I need to head towards. Acceptance or recovery. I don't know. Just somthing."

"Well that's good. What's the next step?" Niall bits down on his lip, looking around the room.

"Got some stuff to tell Harry. I don't want to keep any of it from him anymore." Lisa pats his chest keeping her hand there as they stand in silence together. Niall leans his head down on hers squeezing her waist.

"This can't be a nursery." Lisa looks up at him, eyebrows raised.

"OK. So what will it be? Just a empty room."

"I think I want to move. Start fresh somewhere else. Where its just mine and Harry's memories and eventually our kids. This room is going to be like a dark shadow now. It was a good place and I was going to watch my own kid grow up in here, but now it's just darkness and I don't want anything to do with it. It's not just here either. I see him in all the rooms . I want him gone and I think the best way is to just move on and leave him behind." He moves around the room as he talks pulling open draws to find them mostly empty, all of Landons stuff gone and most likely thrown out.

"I can understand that. Just don't set your heart on that plan love." Niall pushes the draw shut turning back to Lisa.

"Why not?" Lisa sighs, straightening out Nialls top, and patting at his cheeks, somthing his mum used to do when she was talking to him about serious stuff.

"This is Harry's family home. He brought Liam up here, he was with his wife here. It might be the only place he can still feel close to her. He might be OK with the idea of moving but just be prepared for him to not want to."

"I'm not saying he has to sell it or anything. I still have my apartment oi LA, I could sell that and use the money towards buying something else. This will still be a home for us, I'm just not sure it can me the home anymore." He could never ask Harry to sell this place, it was full of memories of Rebecca and he didn't want Harry to give that up if he didn't have to, but he can't see himself raising a family here anymore and he thinks Harry would understand that.

"You want us to go so you can talk to him? Do your steps."

"No, stay for another cuppa."

Xxxxxx

Niall takes his time getting ready for bed, double checking all the locks and switching all the lights off after loading the dishwasher and wiping down the sides.

Harry is sitting up in bed reading when Niall comes into the room after brushing his teeth. He smiles sleepily at Niall pulling back the blanket on of his side for him to climb in. Niall stays by the door nervously twiddling his fingers.

"He had help and not just the two idiots he hired to go into the pub but help from someone we know and love." Harry looks surprised, lowering his book to his lap. "That's the bit I cant tell you yet because it has to be done the right way and there is someone who needs to know first. But if it's OK with you I would like to tell you everything that happened. Start to finish." Harry pushes his book to the floor motioning for Niall to come over to the bed.

"Cave?"

"No, I think just the lights off is enough. But could you hold me?"

"Only if you hold me back." Niall switches the light off and climbed into bed wrapping himself tightly around Harry.

"You sure?" Niall places both his hands flat on Harry's chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart which calms him slightly.

He feels the weight lifting of him with each word, Harry gripping him tighter and tighter as he talks. He tells him everything he can remember from speaking to Daisy on the phone to Liam turning up and ending it all.

He told him the things Landon said. The way he had had felt when he really thought he would not see Harry again. How he had forced himself into Nialls mouth and how he couldn't get himself to do anything to make him stop, not even capable of making himself bite down on him, hurt him back in any way.

They are both crying when he finishes, wiping at each other tears. It's such a relief to have it all out there. He has never done well with keeping secrets from Harry, it's not how they work as a couple.

"I'm so sorry, I should never have left you with him. I knew what he was doing, he fucking told me himself that he was going to get you back, that he was going to fuck you and I just left because my feeling were hurt. I should have stayed and then he would never have had the chance." Niall shushes him, peppering his faces with kisses.

"It's not your fault darlin'. We all need to stop blaming ourselves. We are not the ones who brought him back here and made it possible for this to even happen."

"Who did? Who was helping him?" Niall pushes his finger into Harry hair, the strands soft and smooth as they brush over his skin.

"I can't tell you yet, but I will. Like I said, there is someone who needs to know first and then we will all get together and I will say everything."

"And its someone we love?"

"Yeah, quite a lot."

"It's one of us?" His voice shakes as he talks, and if just the idea is enough to upset him then Niall dreads what it is going to be like when he knows. Niall presses his lips to Harry's forehead, keeping them there as Harry tangles their legs together.

"Let's try and get some sleep." Harry doesn't reply and neither of them even attempt to fall asleep.

Niall keeps Harry close, hand brushing over his hair and down his back and anywhere he can reach as he feels the wet drops of Harry's tears fall onto his shoulder.


	31. Chapter 31

Niall is halfway up the driveway when he is grabbed from behind and his head is slammed into the car. His vision blurs, blood dripping from his forehead as his body slumps forward hands gripping his waist to keep him steady. 

His feet drag across the gravel as he is dragged towards the house, the sound of his shoes scuffing on the gravel echoing in the dark. 

He is dropped to the floor and the front door kicked closed.

The house is dark and when he reaches out he can't find anything where he thinks it should be. 

"Harry." There is a laugh. It fills the room, seeps into Niall and fills him with terror. This was not suppose to be happening. It was done. It  was over. 

"No. No, you said you wouldn't come back." Landon face appears above him, smirking and proud. 

"Why would I give up on you baby." Landon stands up and then it's Matt looming over him instead, simalier expression on his face. Niall looks away letting out a whine. 

"Sorry Ni. But can't have any loose ends can we? Zayn can't find out." 

He is being dragged across the room, a hand wrapped around his ankle. Matt slowly follows slamming his foot into Niall's fingers when he grabs hold of the doorway. Niall cries out desparelty digging his fingers into the floor to try and get enough grip to pull himself free. 

"Please you don't need to do this. I won't tell. I haven't told anyone yet, I can keep quite." The grip on his ankle tightens then he is yanked hard, his fingers scrapping loudly across the lino. Landon drops hit foot but then Matt is there holding his shoulders down when Niall tries to get away. 

"Sorry to do this my love, but if I can't have you nobody can. This just works out better for us all." Everything suddenly goes slow. Niall blinks up at Landon, bent over him knife in hand moving towards him in slow motion. He reaches up for it, easily slipping the handle from Landon grip. 

He turns it to point away from him then twists round to slam it into the side of Matts neck, but it's Harry. 

Niall screams knife clattering to floor as Harry chokes, blood spilling out of his mouth and down to his neck.   
"No! No, no, no Harry." Niall scrambles to his knees pressing his hand into the side of Harry's neck, blood seeping trough his fingers and down his arm. 

Landons laugh fills the room again and Niall can't do anything as Harry falls to the floor, eyes wide and empty. There is so much blood that Niall slips on it and it's keeps flowing, filling up around him as he tries to get closer to Harry. 

"Harry! I'm so sorry, Harry please. Harry!"

Xx

Niall is not aware he is awake until Harry slams into the room and jumps onto bed taking Nialls face into his hands. 

"I'm here, baby I'm right here." He had been screaming Harry's name, throat raw and eyes steaming. 

It was a dream. A nightmare.   
Harry was here and he was safe. 

He pulls Harry down, crys muffled by his lips as he desperately kisses him. 

"You're OK." He trails kisses over Harry's face, hand stroking after them.   
"He was back and they where going to kill me but then you were there and I hurt you."  
"Who was going to kill you."   
"Landon and.." Niall trails off shaking his head from side to side.   
"Who? You can tell me."   
"I can't." Niall falls back to the bed, chest heaving as he tries to calm himself down. 

It was just a nightmare. Harry is fine and Landon is not here. Just a nightmare. 

"Hey, I'm right here. Not hurt see, I'm fine." Harry takes Niall's hands and puts them to his face. Niall drags them down to his neck, resting his plams over the same spot he had in his dream. 

"You're ok." Harry nods, turning his head to the side to kiss Nialls wrist.   
"I'm OK and you are OK. We are safe baby I promise." Harry leans down, keeping hold of Nialls hand as he presses their lips together. Nialls fingers curl, digging gently into the back of Harry neck as their lips drag together in a slow kiss. 

Niall legs part to let Harry settle between then, the bed sheet tightening around Niall's waist as Harry lowers himself down. 

"This is getting to much for you Niall, just tell me who was helping him so I can take some of this for you. I will do whatever you want, I won't let the others know if that's what you want. If you want me to act like I don't even know then I will." If Niall could belive that then he would tell Harry in a heartbeat. He doesn't belive it, he knows Harry won't be able to control his temper. He would take one look at Matt and lose it. 

"I said not yet and I'm sticking to that. Soon, I will make sure it's soon." Harry sighs, dropping his head down to rest on Nialls. 

"I'm so worried about you. I just want to do everything I can to make you feel normal again." Niall wanted that too, so badly. 

Maybe he needed to do somthing about it. Give Matt a push instead of just waiting around for him to do it all by himself. It was going on too long and if it was left for much longer then it was just going to hurt Zayn more. It was a long time for him to find out Niall had been keeping it from him. 

"I need to go somewhere this morning but do you fancy meeting me at the park after?" 

"Naill babe-" 

"I'm fine Harry, promise. How about you put us a picnic together and then go buy my book so when we meet at the park I can read to you. Does that sound nice?" 

"Yeah it does, but you sure you are okay? You don't need to pretend with me" 

"I know that." Niall pushes Harry up so he can sit up and kick the blanket off his legs. "I'm not pretending am i? You just saw me screaming my head off because of a nightmare and let's not forget my broken dick. I'm so far from pretending to be OK." 

"Your dick is not broken." Harry flops onto his back watching Niall as he gets himself dressed. "You're just stressed and upset, it's understable. I just don't get why you won't tell me everything."

"I have told you everything." Niall rummaged around for a jumper, grabbing one that he thinks belonged to Liam and shoves it on. 

"Clearly you didn't as I still don't know who was helping him. You said it's someone close to us, I deserve to know." Niall goes back over to the bed, cradling Harry face and tipping it back so he can give him a kiss. 

"I know, I'm working it out. Just give me the time I need to make sure this comes out in the best way possible." Harry moves back from Nialls touch, pouting. 

"Fine. Just promise whatever you are off to do is not somthing I should be worried about. Is this person dangerous?"

"No, not dangerous. Just lost I think. I promise I will be fine, meet me at the park in two hours." Harry sighs, shoulders lumping as he nods at Niall. 

"Yeah OK, I love you." Niall gives him another kiss before backing towards the door. 

"I love you too darlin'."

Xxxxxxx

When Niall walks into Zayn's house half an hour later its to find a man he has never seen before coming down the stairs buttoning up a white shirt. 

"Oh." He pauses on the bottom step, eyebrow raising as he looks Niall up and down. Matt comes up behind him, freezing when he spots Niall, eye going wide. 

"Right." The man finishes dressing himself then turns to Matt leaning up on his toes to kiss the corner of his mouth. Matt flinches slightly, leaning back.  "Thanks for last night it was...different." Niall steps to the side, clearing his throat as the man puts his shoes on and grabbed his coat. 

Zayn comes bounding down the stairs as Matt is opening the front door to see him out. He is only wearing a pair of tight black boxers, body covered in love bites. He looks surprised to see Niall then smiles ignoring Matt and the man by the door to come over to him and give him a hug. He smells of sweat and sex and it makes something twist uncomfortably in Niall's belly. 

"Where are the kids?" Zayn pulls back, calling a bye over Nialls shoulder before pulling him down the hallway towards the kitchen. Niall tries his hardest to not think of the last time he was here. 

"My parents took them last night. I have been a bit stressed so Matt wanted us to, you know."

"What you been stressed about?" Zayn shrugs his shoulders getting himself a glass down and filling it with water.

"Probably the fact that my best friend was tied up and had god knows what done to him. Oh and I stabbed someone. Want a drink?"

"No. Zayn, I don't want you getting stressed over that. I told you Landon said he was not going to say anything." Zayn scoffed, placing the glass down loudly on the side. 

"And he is so trustworthy? I don't even know what Harry done with the knife because he wont tell me, and i'm not even supposed to be mentioning it to you. He told me to keep my mouth shut and act like it didn't happen."

"He said the same to me to. He just wants to protect us. You tell Matt?" Niall leans back against the worktop, the back of his foot hitting the cupboard door as he crossed his ankles. 

"Yeah, course I did."

"What did he say?" 

"He seemed quite happy I done it actually. It's got me on edge though, and you have been avoiding me."

"Have not."

"Have too." Niall sighs, biting down on his lip. He had not been meaning to to avoid Zayn but being around him when he didn't yet know about Matt was to much strain for Niall. 

"Hey, look i'm not annoyed about it." Zayn moves to stand in front of Niall, hands resting on his hips. Niall looks at the marks on Zayn's chest reaching out to poke one with his finger. Zayn hisses batting his hand away. "I get why you're shutting yourself away. I just miss you is all." Niall reaches out again to brush the tip of his fingers over a mark again. 

"Was he a vampire or somthing?" Zayn laughs looking down at himself. 

"Just a bit. Think he was a little over excited." Niall felt his cheeks heating up at the thought. 

"Well, was he at least good?" 

"I've had better." Niall looks up to meets Zayns eyes, breath catching in his thraot when he sees the look in his eyes. He clearly meant Niall. 

"Yeah?" The corner of zayn's mouth twitches up in what could almost be a smile. 

"What did you come over for anyway?" Zayn's hand covers Niall's pulling them away from his chest. 

"Came to talk to Matt actually." 

"About what?" Matt comes into the room then, now fully dressed looking nervously between Niall and Zayn. 

"Why don't you go get dressed Z, I will take you out for some breakfast before we have to go." Zayn nods, face brightening up. 

"We are going to see Sam again, just a few more visits then we get to have him here for the day. It's going to be so great to see him here." Niall makes himself smile back at Zayn, avoiding looking towards Matt as Zayn pressed a sloppy kiss to his cheek before practically skipping out the room pausing to give Matt a kiss. 

Matt stays by the door watching Zayn until goes up the stairs then turns back to Niall, closing the kitchen door. 

"What your doing ain't fair. Making him think he is getting Sam, that's so cruel." 

"Well as far as I'm concerned we are getting Sam." Niall laughs, fist curling at his side as a wave of anger washing over him. 

"Is that your plan then? Because if you think I'm keeping this to myself just because you've gone out and made your family bigger then I'm sorry but it's not going to work. It's just going to hurt him more. Your making Zayn and this poor boy think he is going to be apart of this family." Matt looks away, throat bobbing.

"I can't do it." His voice wobbles as he speaks, Niall finds it very hard to feel any sympathy for him about it. 

"Well you have to. It's not fair on him and its not fair on me. After everything you have done you are still fucking with my head. You said you're sorry so show it. Tell him so I can finally start to move on." Matt wipes at his eyes with the back of his hand, slumping back into the door with a thud. 

"How, how do I tell him? It's his whole life. Everything will change, I can't do that to him." 

"You already have. As soon as you made the choice to go to Landon you changed everything. I'm giving you until the end of this week. You tell him or I tell him." Matt face drops eyes filling with panic. 

"That's just a couple of days. I need longer then that, please give me more time." Niall shakes his head. 

"No. That's long enough for me. This is killing me Matt and its effecting me and Harry. This was your choice and your mistake my life should no longer be fucked with because of it. You have had enough time and I think I'm being pretty bloody generous to give you more. This is your chance to tell him yourself and maybe have a go at saving your marriage. Or I have to be the one to tell him and I don't think you will be able to come back from that." Niall pushes away from the worktop wanting to leave and get out of the house before Zayn comes back down and he has to see him excited about going to meet with Sam. 

"Please." Matt grabs Nialls arms to stop him from leaving. "Ni please. Can't we just keep this between us. Nothing has to come out. Everyone thinks it was all Landon so why can't we keep it that way. I promise I will never do anything like this again and I know I don't have to worry about you and Zayn now. I'm sorry and I will spend the rest of my life making this up to you. We are family Niall, please." Niall yanks his arm out of Matt's grip, yanking the kitchen door back open glaring at Matt. 

"We are not family, you are nothing to me. The others, they are my family and I will not keep things from them. Giving you the next couple of days is the last thing I do for you. You tell him then you stay the fuck out of mine and Harry's life for good. I meant it when I said we are done. You fucking disgust me." Matt looks devastated and after everything it's still so hard for Niall to turn his back on him and leave the house, like a small part of him still wants to comfort him. 

"Niall." Niall stops, looking over his shoulder at Matt. He is wiping at his face again, a few tears escaping and dropping from his chin. He takes a deep breath, his bottom lips juddering before speaks. 

"I really am sorry, I love you and I'm  going to really miss you and how things where." A lump forms in Nialls throat, his eyes prickling with tears. 

"Me too. Tell him." Niall carries on walking the sound of Zayn singing happily to himself as he gets himself ready for his day floating down from upstairs. It makes Niall faulted in his step, his breath getting stuck in his throat at the sound of him so happy. 

He forces himself to keep going closing the door quietly to himself so he doesn't disturb Zayn. 

Xxxx

"So I got this book. Authors is supposed to be really hot so I thought why not. He has some talent to apparently." Harry is laying flat out on his back, red and green picnic blanket spread out under him and a wicker basket by his head. Niall's book is laying on his chest, his long fingers tapping at the cover. 

"Oh really? How hot we talking?" Harry purses his lips, humming as he thought. 

"Well there is this picture on the back, I would maybe give him a five. Looks like he has a massive cock though so might upgrade him to a seven. Maybe an eight if he has a big arse to match." Niall raises his eyebrow looking behind at his own butt. 

"Looks like I just got myself to an eight." Niall wiggles his bum making Harry wolf whistle. 

"How about your get that eight earning butt down here to kiss me." 

"You want my butt to kiss you?" Niall drops down to his knees crawling up the blanket until he can flop onto Harry's chest. 

"Well I think we both know I am not apposed to having my lips on your arse, maybe when we get home." Niall swats at his shoulder reaching across to grab the book. 

"Gonna have to take a couple of points off on account of me having a limp penis." Harry tuts sliding his fingers under the neck of Nialls jumper. 

"Maybe I like a limp dick. Maybe you just became a nine" 

"Sure ya do freak face. What food did you bring?" Harry shuffled around, jostling Niall about as he dragged the basket closer. 

"I got some of that mint ice cream you like because we are... Mint to be." Niall rolls his eyes, hiding his smile in Harry's chest. 

"Some Melon because you are one in a melon." 

"Jesus Harry." 

"Some tomatos because I love you from my head tomatoes." 

"Your a fucking idiot." Harry held up some cheese over Niall's head and winked. 

"That's what cheese said." Niall sighed, rolling onto his stomach. 

"Why do I love you?" Harry waggled his eyebrows reaching back into the basket and pulling out two oranges. 

"Because I'm your main squeeze." 

"Do you have a piece of food for everything?" 

"No. Just some sandwiches and crisps left." Harry is pouting so Niall pulls his head down for a kiss, sliding there lips together softly drawing a few wines from Harry before Niall pulls away with a smile and a small blush to his cheeks. 

"Fed me while I read." Niall lays back onto his back, propping his head up on Harry and raising his knees as he opens the book up an exited tingled going down his spin as his runs his fingers over the page. 

"Before we start can I ask about this morning? Did you do what you needed to do?" Harry pushes a cube of melon between Niall's lips, using his thumb to wipe up the small dripple of juice.   
"Nearly. Should be sorted soon. You comfy?"   
"Yep." 

A few hours later Niall closes the book and sits up looking around at the scraps of food left before looking behind him at Harry who is staring up at the grey sky eyes blinking rapidly. 

"You killed the mum." Niall grabs a tomato popping it into his mouth. 

"Technically the cancer did."

"You said no one was going to die." Niall turns, crossing his legs and resting his elbows on his knees. 

"I wasn't going to have anyone died. It kind of just happened. Think it was something I needed to do." Harry sits up, smiling sadly at Niall. 

"You didn't tell me." 

"I was scared it was the wrong choice and I like you to have some surprises. Makes reading with you more fun." 

"That was not just fun Niall that was-" Harry flops down again letting a huff.   
"That was real and sad but also funny and happy and I really fucking love you writing books and when's the next one coming? Let's go home so you can write another one." Niall laughs loudly as Harry starts to gather up all the rubbish, dimples popping and eyes glistening. Niall pulls him in for a kiss that is sticky from fruit and sweet from the juice they had been drinking. 

"I love you." Niall nods crawling on to Harry's lap to be closer to him, paying no mind to the people walking around them.

"I love you too." 

"No, no." Harry kisses down Niall's neck, stopping to suck a mark onto his shoulder. Niall gasps head falling back, eyes fluttering shut as Harry's mouth worked over him. "I really fucking love you. Like fuck Niall, it's going to kill me one day. So much love for you." Niall grips onto Harry's shoulders, hips rocking down a little as Harry slowly kissed his way back up to his lips. 

"You're everything Niall. Never loved someone like this before, and that makes me feel really guilty to say but its true. I've never been this in love. You're just, you're my world. I'm always going to be here you know, always going to protect you and keep you safe and do anything I need to do to keep it that way. Going to be so good to you baby boy, for the rest of our lives."

"It was Matt." Harry goes stiff under him, leaning back to look him in the eyes. Nialls ears start to buzz, blood pounding around his body. It made it seem so real. Saying it out loud to Harry. It was real.   
Tears spring to his eyes and this time he doesn't blink or wipe them away, he just let's them flow.   
"What?" Niall slides off his lap, keeping his hands on his shoulders, the touch making him feel a little more grounded.   
"It was Matt, he was the one helping Landon. He went to him. He started it." Harry keeps staring at him, face blank and he takes it in. Then suddenly he is snatching Niall's book up and getting to his feet marching away.   
Niall scrambles up, looking down at their stuff before running off after Harry.   
"Harry!" He catches up to him at the entrance to the car park. "Harry what are you doing?" Harry is digging round in his pockets for his car keys, dropping them to the floor once he pulls them out.   
"Fuck." He curses, bending down to pick them up. Niall follows him as he walks towards the car the keys dropping to the the floor once more as he tries to unlock. The door.   
"Ha-"  
"Fuck!" Niall flinched and jumps back as Harry yells.   
"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" He kicks at the car, hands slapping down on the roof before he slumps forward. Niall glances around nervously at the people who have stopped to watch but before he can say anything Harry is scooping up the keys and getting into the car throwing the book into the back and starting the engine. Niall runs around to the passenger side and only manages to get in the seat before Harry drives out the car park. 

"What are you doing? " Harry grips the steering wheel, face still blank as he looks straight ahead, speed a little to much over what it should be for Nialls liking.   
"Harry!"   
"I'm going to fucking kill him. I'm going to kill him Niall. He is fucking dead." The car lunges as Harry changing gears aggressively. Niall scrambles for his seat belt, gripping on tightly as Harry swerves around a car.   
"You're going to fucking kill us if you are not careful." Harry glances at him then eases off the peddle a little, face like thunder.   
"Take us home."   
"No."   
"You can't go there. You can't say anything to him. This is why I kept it from you." Harry slams the brakes on, the car behind them blaring the horn as they fly past.   
"For fuck sake Harry!" Harry pulls over to the side of the road, switching his hazards on before getting out. Niall watches him as he rounds the front of the car then turns and walks away from it.   
Niall unbuckles his seat belt getting out the car slowly.   
He doesn't approach him straight away but instead crouches down, face in his hands as he takes a few deep breaths.   
He hears Harry vomit. The retching and the splatter as it hits the floor. 

He waits until he stops then stands back up and walks towards him, placing his hand on his lower back. 

"Matt?"   
"Yeah."   
"Our Matt?" Niall leans his forehead against Harry, arms going around his waist in a hug that Harry leans back into.   
"But why?" Harry sounds so heartbroken and Niall know exactly what he is feeling. The confusion and disbelief. How could it be possible that somone like Matt could be the cause of it all.   
"Because of Zayn, his feelings for me. He thought he was going to loose him so he went to Landon. He wanted me gone."   
"Jesus, fuck. Why the hell would he even-the fucking-" He let's out a frustrated yell head falling back onto Nialls shoulder.   
"But it's Matt, Niall. It's Matt." Niall squeezes him, kissing just under his ear.   
"I know. It really sucks."   
"You've been keeping this to yourself, this is what's got you so upset all time."  
"Yeah mostly, I mean what Landon done is effecting me to with the whole, you know, can't get myself hard. This has really been bringing me down though, it's why I went there this morning to try and get him to tell Zayn so I could just get it out and tell everyone else." Harry turned, cupping the back of Nialls neck. He is crying, eyes already swollen and face red and blotchy.   
"Zayn." His name comes out like a whimper, Niall just nods his hands twisting in Harry's jumper.   
"I know. He's going to be devastated, I'm so worried about what it will do to him." Harry tightens his grip on Nialls neck, thumb rubbing behind his ear.   
"We will get him through it. He will be fine, it will all be fine in the end." 

"We have to let him find out from Matt. I have told  him he has until the end of the week so you can't say or do anything to him until then. It's why I was trying to wait so then when you knew you could go do whatever you need to do to cope with it." 

"I want to hurt him. Like really fucking hurt him but at the same time I don't because it's Matt and I really fucking love him." Harry sobs, burying his face onto Nialls shoulder. And that's the problem really. Having all this anger and hatred from him while at the same time still having all this love. 

"Oh my god." Harry steps back hand flying to his mouth looking like he is going to be sick again.   
"I let him touch you. He was already doing stuff to you wasn't he? When we all... He was already- I let him touch you and fuck you. Oh god, I'm so sorry Niall. I trusted him, I trusted him to have you like that, I'm sorry." 

"It's OK." Niall pulls him back, cradling his head to his chest. "I trusted him too. We had no reason not to did we." They stand on the side of the road for what feel to Niall like hours. Harry seems to be switching from angry to sad every few seconds but Niall is sure he will be able to keep it to himself until Zayn knows. Then for Matts sake he really hopes Harry had settled on one emotion by then and it's not anger. 

"Do you have you licence on you?" Harry asks as they walk back to the car hand in hand.   
"Not sure, hang on." Niall drops Harry's hand and jogs the rest of the way to the car leaning in to get his wallet and check.   
"Yeah it's here." He pulls out his green provisnal lisence holding it up to Harry.   
"Good, you need to drive home for me" Niall is shaking his head before Harry even finishes the sentence.   
"I can't do that. I have driven with you like, two times. There are busy scary roads Harry." Harry pushes Niall towards the drivers side with a roll of his eyes.   
"You got that thing and made me put you on the insurance for a reason. I feel too emotional to drive sensibly right now, so can you please just try." Niall looks at Harry, nerves making his hands tingle. He does look really upset still, and the way he was driving before he stopped would probably have gotten them or somone else hurt at some point. Niall takes a deep breath then walks the rest of the way to the door yanking it open and sliding in as Harry gets the L plates from the back. 

Sitting behind the wheel still felt incredibly wierd for Niall. So far he had only gone a little way up the road from their house with Harry by his side, and he had found it terrifying. 

He waits until Harry is strapped in and settled before adjusting his seat to accommodate someone who doesn't have giant sized legs and moved the mirror about a little. 

"Start the car babe." Niall huffed but turned the key, turning the hazerds off.   
"Indicate, check mirros, handbrake blinds spot."  
"Yes Harold I know. You just sit there and be sad OK, you're putting me on edge. Gonna end up being more dangerous." Harry settles back as Niall does the things he said then pulls out onto the road. 

Harry spends most the drive staring out the window which makes Niall feel a little better because he knows Harry is not watching his every move but at the same time worries him because normally he would be chatting Nialls ear off about road safety and making Niall want to throw himself out the car. 

"What do I do here?" Harry looks round again, telling Niall what to do. Truthfully he knows, he has watched Harry drive around enough to know where to be and what to do. He just wanted to see Harry's face. Harry slumps back against the door when Niall is back on a straight road, not far from home now. 

Niall really misses the bus right now but he does get a proud feeling on his chest as he pulls into the driveway and parks. 

"Ha, that was good right. I just done some good zooming." Harry raises his head up and manages to give Niall a smile, reaching out to pat his leg.   
"Really good. We need to get you out more and get you ready for that test."  
"No, we really don't." They both unstrap and get out the car, Harry waiting for Niall to walk up to the door together. 

The house is cold when they get in so Niall goes into the kitchen to turn the heating up, when he goes back into the living room Harry is gone. 

He goes upstairs, hearing the shower switch on as he reaches the top. He hesitates outside the door before carrying on into the bedroom deciding Harry might want some space right now. 

Niall strips down to just his pants and climbs into bed, wrapping the duvet around himself wondering if he could get away with having a short nap so he can just forget about everything for a bit.   
Then again his nightmares where getting worse and he didn't really fancy seeing himself kill his fiance again. So instead he lays on his back, staring at the ceiling as he waits for Harry to come out the shower. 

When he eventually comes into the bedroom he is soaking wet and completely naked still. He yanks the cover of Niall and climbs on top of him, water falling off him and dripping onto Niall and soaking the sheets under him.   
Niall keeps quite as he flattens himself against his body and starts to kiss him. 

Niall runs a hand up his back, water gathering under his fingers before dropping down Harry's sides. The kiss is hard and sloppy and Niall can feel Harry growing hard against his leg already. 

This is normal. This is what they would do together after being stressed or upset. It's always helped, it makes them feel closer and its always easier to talk about feelings when you are in a blissed out state. For them anyway. 

Niall moves his hips up to meet Harry's, hand tangling in his wet hair and tugging slightly. Harry let's out a whimper deepening the kiss and grinding his hips down harder. 

Niall stays soft under him. He hooks his legs over Harry's waist , moving Harry's hand to his neck to make him squeeze a little, hold him down, but nothing seems to work. 

Harry pulls away, the next moments very pradicatable for Niall. Harry will reasurre him it's fine, he just wanted to cuddle anyway, it will get better soon, Niall was just struggling still. 

Niall was so fed up with hearing that already. So he tightens his hold on Harry keeping him from rolling off. 

"It's OK. You can still get off, I like it when you use me don't I. So use me, get off on me." Harry frowns down at him and Niall already knows he won't. 

"I'm not doing that, not if your not into it." Niall looks down, where Harry is still hard against his leg, tip red and leaking. 

"I'm am into it though, that's the bloody problem. I'm so into it but my body just does not seem to realise that. And you know, maybe it never will again so the least we can do it still have you get off. I will still enjoy it I swear." Harrys face softens, and unfortunately so does his dick gradually. Niall sighs in defeat turning his head to the side to shove his face into the pillow. 

"I'm sorry. I hate this." Harry kisses the side of Niall's face, hands running up and down his sides to sooth him. 

"Don't be sorry love. I mean it when I say it will be fine. I'm not with you just for the sex-" 

"But its pretty fucking important." 

"No, not at all. What's important is that I get to wake up to you every morning and fall asleep with you every night. That when I leave for work in the morning it's with a kiss from you and when I come back it's to see you smile and tell me about your day. Its kisses and cuddles and just being with you. Sex is good, sex is a bonus. Sex is not the important bit of us, our love is. I can live without sex Niall but I can't live without you. As long as I get to kiss you then I am the happiest man in all the land." Niall smiles, heart swelling in his chest as he leans up for a kiss. 

They kiss until their lips are swollen and sore and their stomachs are growling for food. Then they kiss as they move around the kitchen putting together a meal of all their favorite things, setting up another makeshift picnic in the living room managing to have a small laugh about the one they abandoned at the park. 

They kiss as they let themselves feel sad again, another piece of thier hearts breaking over what was still to come. 

Then they clear up and go to bed where they kiss some more until Niall falls asleep and has a nightmare free sleep for the first time for nearly three weeks.   
He sleeps feeling like everything is going to be OK, because he has Harry and as long as he has Harry he has love and safety and happiness and family.   
With Harry every broken part of him will gradually heal over and it will always be perfect in the end.


	32. Chapter 32

Saturday morning Harry and Niall decide to pack a bag and go spend the weekend at Louis' cabin. Niall can feel a lot of tension leave him as they drive out of the city and buildings turn into trees and the air starts to feel a little easier to breath in and fresher as it hits his face. 

Music is playing softly, both of them singing along and holding hands over the gear stick. Its nice. Its definitely needed but Niall still feels a small ball of anxiety in his belly that gets a little tighter as the distance between him and Zayn grows. There is a high chance that Matt wont tell Zayn this weekend, that Niall will have to be the one to sit him down and do it, but there is also a small chance that he will and Niall is going to be hours away. 

They were going to be on stand by. Phones always turned on and loud. As soon as they got the phone call Harry has promised they will be hitting the road and getting back to Zayn. Harry seemed pretty convinced that if Matt was to tell him it would be late Sunday so they would be back anyway. 

Its just before lunchtime when they turn off the main road and up the long driveway to the cabin. Niall leans out the window looking up as the threes grow thinker above him. 

He had not been to the cabin since he had come up with Harry and Louis for Liam's fifteenth birthday. It had been a nice break for Niall, to get away from his house with his mum being so unwell, and the weekend had been all about Xbox tournaments, junk food and trying to quietly get himself off without any of them hearing him. The idea back then of Harry overhearing him coming had been mortifying. 

Niall unbuckles his seat belt and is out of the car before Harry has even come to a stop, he runs around the side of the cabin, stopping when he reaches the lake to kick off his shoes and pull his socks off. 

He dips his toes into the water, hissing at how cold it is. He had loved swimming in the lake with Liam, it was a shame it would be too cold to get in this weekend. 

"Please tell me you are not thinking of skinny dipping or anything, my dick will fall off." Niall smiles over his shoulder at Harry, who is climbing up the steps with their bag. 

"No way, just forgot how pretty this place was. So much better then the city." Maybe that's what they should do. Get out of the city permanently. He had never had that desire before, but after everything that has happened and with them wanting to become a family soon maybe being somewhere a little quieter and calmer would be better for them. 

"Come on, lets go in and see if we have enough food. Louis said Lottie had been down to set up for us but she can be as useless as her brother sometimes." Niall grabs his socks and shoes and goes back round the front of the cabin to join Harry. 

The inside still smelt like pine and vanilla, a large photo of Louis' mum greeting them in the hallway. 

"We have the bedroom downstairs." Niall nods, heading into the kitchen to start making them a cup of tea as Harry goes off to dump the bag. 

"Plenty of food." Niall calls out as he rummages in the cupboards. 

"That's you happy then." Harry comes up behind him, arms sliding around his waist as he pressed his lips to the side of his neck.

"Hmm, very much so. Made you a tea." Harry thanks him stepping back to pick his mug up and bring it to his lips to blow on it. Niall leans against the counter opposite him with his own steaming mug.

"What do you want to do first?"

"Was thinking we could go for a walk, after being stuck in the car for so long I feel all scrunched up. I got old bones now." Niall rolls his eyes, gulping some of his tea down enjoying how he can feel the warmth of the liquid go down his throat.

"OK old man, a walk sounds good."

Xxxxxxx

The first time Niall had come to the cabin was when he had only known Liam a couple of months. The second night Liam had dared him to sneak out the cabin and go stand in the woods for an hour at 2am, a time that Liam had convinced him the dead come out. Niall had made it fifteen minutes before he heard a twig snap and he ran back to the cabin, heart feeling like it was going to spill out of his mouth with how scared he was, and smacked straight into harry as he come in the back door.  
It had been the first time he had been nervous of Harry, convinced he was about to get told of by his friends dad. Instead Harry grabbed him a blanket to warm him up and made them both some hot chocolate. It was the first time he had talked to Harry without Liam being there.

"I thought you where about to wet yourself." Harry laughs, head flung back after Niall reminded him on the memory.  
"I'm surprised I didn't. I honestly thought a evil ghost was following me. Then I thought you where going to kill me for sneaking out." Harry pulls Niall closer by his hand grinning down at him as he tucks him into his side.  
Niall takes a deep breath, enjoying the fresh air and the silence. He didn't notice how loud the city was until now while walking with Harry with nothing but the sound of birds, water trickling and their footsteps.

"Nah, it was nice seeing Liam having fun and pulling pranks with you. He didn't really have a close friend before you and he was still really upset about his mum. Was a relief when you came along and brought him back to himself."

"Yeah well, he done the same for me. You too, both of you." 

They continued in silence, Niall staying tucked up close to Harry, hands held loosely between them as they walked. When they reached the part of the woods where the river came to a bend, the place that Louis and Liam would come to fish, Harry stopped and pointed to the other side of the water. 

"There used to be two more cabins over that side, they got destroyed in a flood and instead of rebuilding both owners just knocked them down."

"Shame." Harry hummed, pressing a quick kiss to Niall's head. 

"Yeah. When I was twelve, Louis' mum brought us all here during the school holidays and I had my first kiss with a boy who lived in one of them. Scared me to death that I fancied him so ran back to the cabin crying and told Jay about it." 

"Was she cool about it?"

"Yeah she was. Like super cool, talked me trough it and made me feel like I was normal. Kinda put me into this false sense of security that my family would be just as fine with it." Niall reaches up to smooth out Harry's frown with his thumb, tucking some of his curls back into his beanie.

"Your mum is fine with you. She tolerated me that one time she come to see us." Harry snorts, kicking at the ground with his boot. 

"Yeah, only because my mum dose not know how to be rude. I don't know, she doesn't hate it but I think she blames my sexuality on her and my dad's divorce. If he hadn't caught with with a boy then the fighting wouldn't have started and they might still be happily married."

"Harry, love your dad was a prick, if your mum can't see that you done her a favour by making him show his true colours then that's not your problem." Harry bumps him with his hip, lips twitching up into a smile.

"Yeah well. That was my first kiss anyway. Peter Smith, two years older then me just so you know."

"Ah so your pulling game has always been strong then. That's my boy." Harry laughs, shaking his head and starts to walk again pulling Niall along with him. 

"Remember when we used to come here and Liam and Lou would go fishing and you would hide away in your room cause it was so not cool to hang out with the dad."

"Hey I thought you were cool. Maybe if I knew you fancied me I would have hung around you more."

"I did not fancy you."

"Yeah of course you didn't." Harry digs his fingers into Niall sides, stumbling backwards as Niall lets out a loud cackle trying to get away. 

"I did not! You were a kid, would have been weird. You where super cute though, with your rosy cheeks and baby fat."

"Oi! fuck off." Niall slaps his hand across Harry's chest, still trying to get out of his grip. "My baby fat was not that bad!" 

"I know, I said it was cute didn't I. You were so sweet back then, such a good boy." Niall's back hits the trunk of a tree, air rushing out passed his lips as Harry grabs his thighs and lifts him up.

"I am still a good boy I have you know." Harry hums, wrapping Niall's legs around his waist and pressing up against him to help support him. 

"You are. Always such a good boy." Niall's breath hitches, head rolling to the side as Harry runs his nose up the side of his neck. 

"Make me so happy." He tugs at the end of Harry's hair, fingers pushing up the back of his beanie as he placed cold, opened mouth kisses along Niall's skin. He rolls his hip, groaning at the friction as Harry slowly pulls down the zip of his jumper, pushing it down his shoulders so he can kiss across his chest. 

"Harry." Harry pressed against him harder, the rough bark of the tree scrapping Niall's back in a way that actually feels nice, making Niall's toes curl in his shoes. He thinks that maybe he could get there this time. Maybe this is what he needed. To be away from home, to be in the clean air and to have some peace and quite with Harry. 

He hands start to shake, gripping onto Harry tighter, and he can feel the small shimmer of arousal tugging at his gut. 

But that's as far as it goes. 

Niall tightens his legs, rolls his hips again letting out a frustrated grunt as he desperately tries to chase the feeling that he is just on the edge of getting. Harry pulls back, finger trailing trough the wet marks left from his lips. 

"I love you, I'm gonna put you down." Niall drops his legs hands coming up to cover his face.

"Don't hide from me." Harry gently removes Niall's hands lifting his chin up to to make him look at him. 

"When I kiss you I don't need it to become more, stop trying to force it love." 

"I'm sorry, I don't mean too. It's just that I want it Harry. I want it so badly."

"I know, and it will happen eventually. Until then let's just enjoy taking things slow." Harry brushes Niall's hair back, pecking his lips before taking his hand and nodding his head towards the direction they had just walked from.

"Should we go back? Warm up in the bath and then you can cook for me."

"Harry." Niall steps into Harry's arms curling his arms around his neck.   
"Thank you for being so patient and loving and amazing to me. It really blows my mind how lucky I got with you." Harry smiles, leaning down to kiss Niall, hand spreading over his back.   
"I got pretty luck too. Now come on, there is a big bath tub and lots of bubbles for us to take advantage of."

Xxxxx

 

"So what's the plan for when Zayn finds out?" Niall is mixing some chicken up with some herbs and oil, Harry sat on the counter next to him munching on some cucumber. 

"Can we really make a plan? We don't even know what direction he is going to go in. He could get super angry and lash out or he could go really sad and hide away." Niall sighs, wiping the back of his hand over his forehead to move a piece of hair that had been tickling at his skin. 

"I know, but my worry is that either of them things could have the end result of him relapsing, and this time he is not going to have the loving husband to bring him back. It's just so fucked up that this is going to happen to him and I don't want him doing anything that will make it even harder for himself later on. We have to think of the kids too. It's going to effect them if Matt and Zayn split up so they are going to need Zayn in a good frame of mind to help them with it, not off drugging himself up." Harry slides off the counter, standing behind Niall with his chin resting on his shoulders. 

"The only thing we can do is be there for him and keep an eye on him. We will make sure he is never alone and we will help with the kids for as long as he needs us too. We will all come together for him. He will get trough it. You wont lose him too, I promise." Niall closes his eyes, leaning back into Harry. He always knew what Niall was really thinking. He was terrified of losing Zayn in all of this too, only with Zayn it could be worse because he could end up killing himself if he was not careful. 

"Did he tell you about Sam?"

 

"No." Niall goes back to preparing the food, moving over to the sink to wash his hands before grabbing what he needs out of the cupboards. 

"They went to this foster home in Essex's, started the process to adopt this boy. He has Downs Syndrome."

"Oh. And Matt went along with it? Knowing him and Z might not even be together?"

 

"Yep. I think he is using it as a reason for Zayn to stay, which is a really dickish move. Zayn seems to be really attached to Sam already, so he has to deal with the loss of that too. It's going to really fucking suck Harry." Harry leans on the worktop, hands rubbing over his face.

"Yeah, it will. God, poor Zayn. I just- I feel like I would do anything to stop this for him you know. Like he is that angry kid again sleeping on Cassie's sofa because people just keep fucking shitting on him. He is so good, I just want him to have what he deserves and just be happy." Niall drops what he is doing to curl up behind Harry, forehead presses into his back.

"I know. Me too."

"I hate how he feels about you, I will always wish he never loved you but I don't want this for him. I would never want anything to hurt him."

"I know that love, and he knows that too. We just have to get him through it, be there for him like you said. We can give him what he needs can't we." Harry turns, arms wrapping around Niall.

"We can try. I just hope we can do enough for him." 

xxxxxxxxxx

Niall slips outside for a smoke as Harry cleans up the stuff from lunch. 

He had been texting Liam on and off all day for any sign that anything had happened with Zayn, just in case Zayn didn't call him up, but everything seemed to be pretty normal back home at the moment. 

"Hey smoky Joe." Niall turns away from Harry, hopping up on the the rail of the deck with his feet dangling down.

"Sorry." Harry shrugs leaning next to him.

"I don't mind. Thanks for lunch it was nice." Niall looks up, blowing smoke out and away from Harry. 

"It's so peaceful out here. Like you can finally hear your own thoughts over all the traffic and sirens and bloody fumes."

"I was not aware fumes where loud." Niall chuckles nudging Harry. 

"You know what I mean. Its all so gross and just fogs everything up." Niall flicks some ash to the floor, looking out at the lake. "You ever think about what it would be like to live away from it all? Get out the city and just start a new life?" Harry pulls himself up to sit next to Niall, tangling their feet together. 

"To be honest I have thought about it a lot the past few weeks. Louis said something to me a while ago, about me and you getting out into the countryside and settling down for a peaceful life. It's kind of stuck with me ever since." Niall places the cigarette between his lips, letting it dangle a little as he lets himself think about packing it all up and going. 

They would miss everyone. It would mean being away from his Dad, Liam, Louis, Zayn and the kids. Away from River and Nolan who was not even old enough to remember Niall that well if he suddenly left. Of course they would still see them but it wont be the same as it is now. Where they are all down the road from each other and can drop in and out of each others houses as they please. 

It would be so good for Niall, Harry and their future family though. And there was Facetime and Skype and its not like Niall could not afford to go back and forward between them all. Things had always been about what was best for them all as a group. Maybe he and Harry had earned the right to just start thinking about themselves. 

"I don't want to live at the house anymore. Not after what happened there. I don't want to have our child grow up there, and I know its your family home and it's where you and Rebecca brought Liam up so I don't want you to sell it or anything but I want to live somewhere else." Harry is silent for a while. Niall drops his cigarette to the floor watching it land just under his feet. 

"This is probably just me getting ahead of myself but the other day I went online and I saw this farm house for sale in Suffolk." Niall turns to face Harry. "It had a decent amount of land with it too, like a good garden and space for some animals because how cute would that be Niall. Me and you with kids and dogs and fucking pigs or something." Niall laughs, but god he can actually picture Harry with pigs as pets. "I just got this feeling in my chest when I saw the pictures, and it had been up for awhile so i called the agent and they said nobody was showing any interest so I think if we wanted to we could like convince the owner to put the price down some more and I think we could afford it Niall. We might have to take a small mortgage if we don't sell our house but we could do it."

"I could sell my apartment, in LA. It's just sitting there empty and I don't plan on going back to it. I could sell that." Harry's eyes go wide, hands clutching Niall's between them.

"So you would want to? You want to look into this house? Move with me out of the city like for real? Not just talking about how nice it is and fantasizing about it but real life go see it and put an offer down?" 

"Yes! Yes please, I really want that. I think I really need that Harry." Harry grins then pulls Niall in for a kiss, dragging his body closer to him and hooking his legs over his waist. Niall laughs into the kiss holding tightly onto Harry's shoulders to stop himself slipping off the rail. 

They where actually going to do this. It feels so quick and sudden and he had no idea that Harry had even been thinking the same thing as him, but they where going to do it. Nothing had felt so right to Niall in such a long time. 

He feels the last of the tension leave his body as Harry licks into his mouth mumbling about the taste of smoke as they both grin so wide their teeth clash together.


	33. Chapter 33

If Niall needed anything else to convince him moving away was the best thing for him and Harry then sitting out on the deck to watch the sunrise in complete silence would have been the thing to do it.

Wrapped up in a blanket with a mug of tea on his lap Niall felt at complete peace as he watched the sunlight break through the trees and shine down on the river in front of him.

He closes his eyes for a second and tries to imagine the added sound of kids in the house, whatever pets they would end up with sniffing around his feet and it feels pretty perfect.

Opening his eyes again, it's a little brighter then when he closed them, he lifts his drink to his lips and sips relaxing back as the hot liquid warms him more.

He feels like things are clicking into place for him and Harry.  
He has spoken to Sonya to get her help putting his place in LA up for sale and in the same phone call had cancelled all his work commitments as he wanted to dedicate the next few months to spending as much time with Harry as possible and hopefully getting ready for the move. (Niall is not letting himself think about it but getting a baby in that time would also make things pretty perfect)  
Harry had set them up an appointment with their bank to talk about getting a small mortgage and also booked a viewing for the house for afterwards.

There was going to be a lot to do. Most people would be really stressed at the idea of it all but Niall couldn't wait for it all to start. This was making him feel like it was going to be OK. Him and Harry had this amazing future ahead of them.

Landon hasn't taking anything from them at all.  
He had failed and he was gone.

Niall is pulled out of his peaceful moment as Harry returns from run, bandanna pulling his hair back and jumper zipped right up to his neck.

"Morning beautiful. I thought you would still be asleep." He runs up the steps stopping when he reaches Niall, reaching out to tuck the blanket round him tighter.

"It's cold."

"It's pretty. I heard you leave so thought I would make the most of seeing the sun coming up."

"Sorry I woke you, I may have tripped." Niall smiles, feeling so much affection towards Harry that it makes his toes tingle.

"Of course you did. Do you feet ever know what they are doing?" Harry shrugs then bends down to kiss Niall, lips cold but still soft.

"Breakfast?"

"Yes please." Harry helps Niall get down from the rail, taking his blanket and mug for him as they go back inside the cabin and to the kitchen.

"Eggy bread?" Niall nods hopping up on the counter to watch Harry get everything ready.

"Nice run?"

"Yeah it was really good." Harry passes Niall some eggs to crack into the bowl, taking the shells from him when he is done.   
"You should join me next time." Harry grabs some berries from the fridge and Niall snatches one as he walks past to place them on the table.   
"I would actually rather die." Harry rolls his eyes flicking at Niall's nose before starting to cook.

"How we going to tell everyone about us moving?"

"I don't know. We will just have to come out and say it. Explain to them why we want to and I think they will understand. Think we should tell Liam first, separate from the rest."

"I agree with that."

"I don't want him to think I'm stealing you away from him. I really don't want him to feel he is forgotten with us having kids together, he will be apart of them ya know. When we say that we have kids it has to include him. He needs to know that." Harry nods along as Niall talks giving him a thankful look.

"I'm glad you think so. I know it might be weird for you and that being with you is different to someone else in the way that you won't actually want to see yourself as a parent figure to Liam, for obvious reasons. So it's nice to know you have thought to speak to him about it."

"Of course, I love him a lot."   
They take their plates to the table, Niall taking out his phone and placing it at the centre before sitting down. Harry looks down at it mouth twisting.

"You think he will tell him today?" Niall shrugs, cutting into his bread and taking a bite.

"If he wants a chance at saving his marriage he will."

"You would be fine with that? If they stay together it means Matt will still be around a lot, I don't know about you but if I spend too much time with him I think I would end up beating the crap out of him."

"I'm fine with and will support what ever makes Zayn happy. If they stay together Matt will simply be my best friends husband, not my friend." Harry watches him for a bit, cutlery clutched in his hand.

"I don't think it will be Matt or himself he makes the choice for though." Niall wipes his mouth looking confused.

"What do you mean?"

"Zayn's automatic response to most things is to think about you. Matt is his person and I have never doubted that but he wants you happy all the time. If he knows you have no plans to forgive Matt then he is going to leave him anyway. I think that no matter what today is going to be the end of their relationship." Niall puts his cutlery down, appetite completely gone and replaced with a sick feeling.

Zayn was about to lose the perfect life he thought he would never have and he had absolutely no idea it was about to happen. The fact that there was nothing Niall could do stop it or take the hurt about from him was the worst feeling he had ever felt.

Xxxxx

Niall dips his foot into the river, shivering at the temperature before turning to Harry who was crouched down filling a basket with some wood for the fire.

"So this girl kink, we gonna talk about it?" Harry stiffens then slowly stands up turning to face Niall.

"Girl kink? I'm bisexual babe, that's not really the same as having a kink right?" Niall rolls his eyes, shoving his foot back into his shoe before stomping over to Harry.

"No, I mean the whole you getting off while I refer to your arse as a pussy thing." Harry's eyes widen a blush creeping over his face as he giggles.

"Oh right." Harry looks around shyly, like there was a possibility someone could overhear this conversation.   
"I don't really have a kink. At least not one for you calling me a girl."

"Harry, do I need to remind you of the noises you made and how much you came that day?"

"No thanks I remember quite well. I think it was more to do with you being with a girl. I was picturing it you know, as you said it. A girl, with you. You doing that to a girl. You and a girl. Sexually."

"Alright I get it." Niall laughs taking Harry's hands in his. "So that turns you on? The idea of seeing me like that." Harry starts to fidget, face turning redder. He was honestly too cute.

"Yeah, I think sharing a girl with you would be like pretty fucking hot. Like don't you understand how hot you would look between a girls legs."

"Unfortunately I don't really get the appeal. I understand why you would though." Niall's voice trails of towards the end, noticing how flustered Harry was actually getting. His breath was picking up, hand clenching at his sides and when Niall looked down there was a very obvious bulge in his jeans.

" Oh wow, it really effects you that much?" Harry shrugs, movements slow.

"It's umm, well its been like a long time since we... Which is fine but I'm kinda getting really, like it doesn't seem to take much too g-" Harry cuts of with a gasp as Niall puts his hands to his chest and shoves him back until he is pressed to the side of the cabin.

"Getting frustrated darlin'?" Niall presses up against him, feeling Harry's cock press into his leg. Harry eyes flutter, breathing out a shaky breath as Niall runs his hands up his side.

"No, I'm fine. Its all good." Niall hummed leaning up to run his lips lightly over Harry's neck, feeling his body jump under his touch.

"Why don't you let me take care of you?" He didn't see the point in Harry going without just because his dick was not playing ball. It's not like Niall was not into the idea, he loved seeing Harry get off, loved being the one to do it.

"We said we where going to take it slow."

"We can take it slow. You could just rub up against me, that's slow right? Like going right back to the start. It's how you made me come the first time, made me feel so good, let me make you feel good." Niall nudges Harry's nose with his before pressing their lips together in a gentle kiss, leaving it to Harry to turn it into more. He can feel that Harry is hesitating while kissing back, leaning away from Niall a little and keeping his hands off him.

"Come on." Niall practically purrs his words hands trailing under Harry's top, Harry's muscles tensing under the tips of his fingers. "I want it, want you to use me. I love it when you use me. Need it." Harry grabs his waist spinning him around to press him against the wall.

"You're a pest you know that." Niall reply gets stuck in his throat as Harry yanks his trousers down and presses himself against Niall's arse. "Want me to use you baby?" Niall nods, head going fuzzy as Harry starts to grind against him, the roughness of his jeans scrapping against his skin.   
"Right here? Like this? What if someone walks by, sees you bent over for me letting me do what i want." Niall gasps pushing his forehead against the wall, heat spreading over him. He arms shake with the pressure of keeping himself against the wall so he let's his body slump forward as Harry keeps grinding against him.

"You going to answer me love? Is that what you want?" Niall moans out a yes, pushing back on Harry.

"Niall, baby." Harry lifts Niall back up keeping his arms hooked around him as he stumbles back slightly.   
"You're so hard." Niall looks down at himself, the head of his dick poking out of his shorts from when Harry yanked the backs down, Precum smeared all over his stomach. Niall would probably cry with relief at the sight and feel of himself getting hard but he is too turned on to do anything so he just leans back into Harry more letting out a moan.

"You can-do you want me to, baby can I touch you?" Niall nods frantically grabbing Harry's wrist to move his hand to his dick.

"Please, please, Harry."

"I got you baby." Harry stokes hims softly, the simple movement almost making Niall black out with how good it felt to finally feel something.   
"I want you to go get into bed for me. Going to take care of you, going to take what I want." Niall nods again, it seems to be the only thing he is capable of doing, then Harry is pulling his shorts back up and nudging him forward.   
"Can you manage?" Niall doesn't answer him, he just stumbles forward and makes his way to the steps going up them slowly.

It feels like it takes him ages to get to the bedroom, breath coming out in short pants as he falls onto his back. Harry doesn't leave him long, but when he comes into the room he takes him time getting undressed down to his boxers eyes always on Niall as he moved around the room.

"Are you OK? Use words." Niall swallows and with what feels like too much effort manages to get out a yes.

"Are you good with me doing this with you?"

"yes."

"Are you sure, because this is happening really quick and we said we would take it slow and we can keep it simple." Niall groans glaring up at Harry.

"Fuck me." Harry looks for a second like he might put a stop to it and Niall is ready to kick him in the face because he is literally laying on the bed with his dick so hard it could fall off and Harry is hesitating.   
"Harry!" Harry moves onto the bed fingers hooking onto Niall's shorts to pull them down and off his feet.

Niall sighs at the feeling of his erection finally being free and relaxes back into the bed.

"You want me to take control?" Niall lifts his head up from the pillow, Harry still looks so unsure, but this is what Niall needs. Maybe it's what's been missing.

After want Landon done he needs to know that Harry will still be the same with him, won't treat him like damaged goods. He likes when Harry gets into this kind of head space. Not exactly dominating Niall, because that's not how they work, but a more softer approach.

"Yes please. Want to be good. Make you feel good."

"Oh love." Harry crawls up Niall's body, keeping himself raised up on his knees so he doesn't actually touch him, and helps remove his top leaving Niall completely naked. "You are the one the deserves to feel good." Harry reaches down between them to wrap his hand around Niall's cock.

Niall is pretty sure he is going to be quick, and he is a little bit terrified that this is a one off thing, he has no way to know if this means he is back to normal or not.

He takes everything in him to reach out and stop Harry's hand working over him.   
Harry looks up with wide eyes, like he things he done something wrong, like that could even be possible.

"Need you inside me." Harry just stares at him for a bit then moves off him. Niall hates the loss of Harry's body over his, has to twist his hands into the pillow to stop himself from calling out to him as he ruffles through their bag.

When he stands back up again, lube in hand, Niall could cry at the sight.

"I'm here baby." Niall realises then that he has been making needy noises, legs kicking around on the bed.   
"Got to take my time with you, been a while. I'm going to take such good care of you." Niall tenses up slightly as Harry pushes a slicked up finger into him. It felt tight but bearable and Niall really enjoyed the feeling of being so full after such a long time.

Harry took his time working up to three fingers, keeping his lips attached to any part of Niall he could reach and whispering words of praise that had Niall squirming and flushing knowing he was being so good for Harry.

Harry removes his fingers when Niall starts to make impatient sounds, moving away from him for a moment to spread some lube over himself and a little more on Niall.

He lines himself up, free hand tangling with Niall's as he slowly pushes into him.

Niall gasps at the stretch, legs wrapping around Harry's waist to bring him in closer and push him in deeper and quicker.

Harry drops his head into Niall's neck, kissing purple marks onto his skin as he slowly rocks his hips into Niall.

Niall grips Harry's hand tightly in his, the other gripping his waist pushing down wanting Harry deeper and deeper, wants to feel and think nothing but of Harry inside him making him feel full.

Harry slides a hand down Niall's side feeling where his back starts to curve up from Niall arching up into him. He moves his hand to his back, settling just above the swell of his arse and starts to snap his hips forward at a quicker pace as he feels his orgasms building.

Niall pulls Harry until their foreheads are touching hand tangling in his hair.

"I'm going to come." He whispers before pressing their lips together. Harry kisses him back before leaning back to watch as Niall's face twists in pleasure, mouth falling open in a silent moan as he starts to come. Harry slowly fucks him through it, holding him as he body jolts with each wave the washes over him come covering his stomach and chest. His legs tense before dropping from Harry's waist spreading wider across the bed, his hands moving to grip the headboard of the bed.

Once he relaxes in his grip Harry picks his pace up again moaning into Niall's shoulder as he starts to come inside him.

Niall stokes his hand over Harry's face, head turned to the side to kiss the inside of his arm as he gently lowers himself down onto Niall.

They stay like that, come spread between them and Harry slowly going soft inside Niall as they catch their breaths.  
Niall looks so blissed out that he feels a little guilty that it didn't last longer.

Niall gradually comes out of daze a lazy smile spreading over his face as he looks up at Harry.

"I'm fixed." Harry kisses his nose.

"You were never broken." Niall's smile grows.

"I love you."

"I love you more."

"Impossible."

"Agree to disagree."

Xxxxxxx

"I swear to god if you don't go harder I will headbutt you." The sound Harry makes could probably be described as a growl. Niall thinks he defiantly growled.

"Maybe you should be thankful I'm still managing to fuck you." Harry yanks Niall up by his hips so he is on his hands and knees, dropping his leg off the sofa to steady himself as he starts moving harder.

"Seems to me you should be pretty thankful too, oh fuck." Niall drops his head down with a groan as Harry manages to hit his spot dead on.

"Seems to me you need to be more quite."

"Yeah well seems to me yo-" Harry shoves three fingers into Niall's mouth pushing down on his tongue to shut him up. Niall struggles against it for a few seconds before letting out a huff and makes his mouth go slack around his fingers.

"That's better. Now are you going to take what I give you or should I stop?" Niall nods then shakes his head clearly confused about how he should answer. Harry leans down to kiss his back, wet with sweat from doing nothing but fuck each other for the past three hours.   
"Well done." Niall moans around harry's fingers at the praise, a small bit of spit dribbling from his lips, making him feel dirty in the best way possible.

He stays quite, biting down on Harry's fingers when he tries to take them out. Enjoying feeling full from both ends, and the way the tips of his fingers slightly brush the back of his throat when Harry sends his body jolting forward with each thrust.

Niall leans against the sofa the best he can so he can wrap a hand around himself and start tugging. He knows Harry is getting close by the way he is gripping him tighter and his movements become harder but slower.

Niall moans around Harry's fingers, chin now soaked from spit as his chest heaves with how good he feels edging closer and closer to coming.

"Oh fuck baby, gonna fucking come." Niall's eyes roll, Harry's hand pushing against his mouth more as he starts to come moaning loudly into Niall's back.

"Come on, you too. Come for me." Harry reaches round to cover Niall's hand with his own, tightening his grip on his cock and running his thumb over the sensitive tip sending him over the edge and spilling over their fists.

"Jesus. I swear it gets better each time." Harry hum in agreement helping Niall settle onto his back, proud to see they didn't get any come on the sofa. Same can't be said for the bedroom carpet or the kitchen table.   
At least one will be easy to clean.

Niall's phone starts ringing and both groan still feeling in too much of a post orgasmic daze to want to deal with it.

"If it's Sonya or Maggie tell them you are to busy with my dick." Niall laughs lazily searching around the floor for his phone.

"What if its the adoption agency?" He wishes he didn't say it as soon as the words are out of his mouth because it won't be but he will always really wish it was.

"Tell them we got bored waiting so we are making our own." Niall snorts finally finding his phone.

"It's River." Harry nods getting up from the sofa to get a flannel to clean then with as Niall answers.

"Hello sweetheart, how's are ya?"

"Good thanks love, how is the cabin treating you?" Niall looks down at his softening dick, covered in his own come and grins.

"Pretty good."

"I'm glad, you both deserve it. Unfortunately I may be about to ruin your peace and quite." Niall groans sitting up, why is he even surprised.

"Hit me with it."

"I just went to see Zayn cause he has this baby carrier thing I want to borrow slash sneakily steal and him and Matt are really going at each other. Well more like Zayn is going at him and Matt is just taking it." Niall shots up, foot slamming into the leg of the table the pain barely registering with him.

"Do you know what about?"

"No. I walked in and it was chaos. The house was trashed and Zayn as just screaming at him, like really going for it Ni it was a little scary to be honest. The kids where there too so I just grabbed them and left." Harry comes back from the bathroom, dropping the flannel to the floor, rushing over to Niall when he sees the look on his face.

Zayn knows.

"Where are you now?"

"At home with the kids, I don't even know if they noticed me take them."

"I need you to call Liam for me and get him to go to Zayn, tell him to stay there even if Zayn says he doesn't want him too and he has to stand outside the house. Do that as soon as I hang up OK?"

"Yeah of course. Whats going on?" Harry is standing with his hands together looking like Niall is feeling.

"Just keep the kids for me and I will explain as soon as I can. Go ring Liam." Niall hangs up heading towards the bedroom.

"Matt told Zayn so we need to leave now." They both get cleaned up dressed, Niall shoving all their stuff back into the bag as Harry rushes around turning everything off and putting out the fire.

Niall can't work out if he wants to scream or cry thinking about what Zayn must be feeling right now.

This is the part Niall had been dreading the most.

They are in the car twenty minutes later Niall trying to get through to Zayn's mobile.

"Why won't he answer." Niall drops his phone to his lap, leg bouncing as he thinks about what must be going on in Zayn's head right now.

"Maybe they are talking it out." Niall scoffs dropping his head into his hands.

"I just need to get to him." They still have another three hours of driving and it feels like they are half way across the world to where Niall needs to be.

"I know, we will be there soon. We will be with him soon." Niall leans his head on the window closing his eyes and trying to let the cold glass sooth him.   
It does nothing.

He nearly tells Harry to stop a few times, convinced he is going to throw up.   
He hates not being there. Hates that he doesn't know what's going on.   
He doesn't even really know if the argument was about Matt and Landon. He just had to be, what else could Matt have done to make Zayn so angry.

Niall nearly jumps out of his seat when his phone rings and Zayn's name come up on the screen.

"Hi." Niall voice is already shaking. There is silence for a long time. Niall stares at the clock in the car watching the numbers change as he waits.   
"Zayn, talk to me love."

"Tell me its not true." Niall slumps back pushing his hand against his mouth to stop himself from sobbing.   
He sounds so heartbroken.   
"Please Niall, it can't be true. Please, I can't-it hurts, it really hurts please say he didn't do this." Niall's shoulders shake as he starts to cry, Harry's hand gripping at his leg.   
"I'm sorry." Zayn let's out a cry, the sound making Niall hit out at the dashboard of the car.   
"No, it's not true. It's not. Niall please. It's not true." Niall presses the phone hard against his ear, like it could bring him closer to Zayn as he listens to him cry and plead with Niall to say things that he can't.   
"I'm nearly home. I'm going to be with you soon. I'm so sorry."


	34. Chapter 34

They are ten minutes from home when Niall finally gets Liam on the phone.

"About time. How is he?"

"Sorry, there is a lot to sort out in the house, he really done a number on it. I don't really have any idea on how he is doing. He locked himself downstairs when he heard me come in and I don't have a key or know where one is." Niall turns to Harry.

"We need to go go first. Li, I have a key so I can get to him when I get there." Harry changes lane now heading for their house.

"OK that's good. None of us can get hold of Matt or have any idea where he is. You know what's going on? How worried should I be Ni? I mean the house was really smashed up and I have no idea what state he is in, do you think he is hurt? " Niall rubs over his face letting out a frustrated sigh. Harry glances over looking worried.

"I know whats going on but I have to talk to Zayn before we tell you all. Just keep doing what you're doing, we won't be much longer and I will go down and see him." Niall hangs up as Harry turns into their street. He had not talked much on the drive back but but neither had Niall really. He had not heard from Zayn since he called him and that worried him a lot, but it was reassuring to know he was still in the house and that Liam was there to see if he left.

Niall gets out the car as soon as Harry stops and runs up to the door, Harry waiting with the car still running.

He heads straight to the kitchen to get the key from the small pot on the window sill to find it empty. He starts searching around the kitchen hands starting to shake and movements becoming more urgent the longer he looked.  
When Harry come in Niall was yanking stuff out of the junk draw and throwing it to the floor.

"Ni?"

"I can't find the fucking key. If I can't find the key then I can't get to him and I need to get to him. Fuck!" Niall slams the draw shut, kicking the cupboard hand tugging at his hair.

"Why did the do this? Everything was so good Harry. Louis and Cass had just got married, we had just got engaged and we had River and Nolan here and It was so good and then he brought him here and it's been shit. It's been so fucking shit with us fighting all the time and I feel like I hardly spent time with Nolan and Cassie and Rae got hurt and I feel so far away from everyone and now I have to go face Zayn who is going to be so fucking destroyed over this and I am so fucking scared to see him and I don't know what to do. Why did he have to do this? Why couldn't he have talked to us, we fucking love him Harry so why didn't he just say how he was feeling so we could have helped, I would have done anything to make him feel better and more secure. I'm so fucking angry and sad. I'm so sad." Harry rushes forward wrapping himself around Niall as he starts to cry, everything bubbling up and spilling over.

" Hey, look at me." Harry lifts Niall's head up wiping away his tears with his sleeve.   
"This is the last thing we have to deal with. We just have to do this and then we get the hell out of here and nothing is going to touch us ever again. Its almost over so we are going to stay strong and we are going to get Zayn through this. I'm scared too because we have no idea what we are about to go through with him but I know that you can do this. Just remember you're not alone, you have all of us to help you. You and Zayn can go into your weird little friendship bubble you have but as soon as it get to hard you turn to us alright, and we do this together, for Zayn."

" Is that your nice way of telling me to get my shit together and focus on Zayn? " Harry laughed resting his for head in Niall's.

"Yes it is. Now come on, we moved the spare keys upstairs remember." Niall doesn't remember and could definitely start nagging at Harry about his habit of moving shit but he will save it for another day.

Niall leaves Harry to go upstairs and get the key and heads outside to wait for him, getting back into the car taking a few deep breaths to calm himself.

Harry comes out passing the key to Niall and quickly starting the car up again and backing out of the driveway.

"Do you think Matt cleared all the drugs out? Should I get Liam to check over the house?" Harry shakes his head, reaching for Niall's hand and pulling it to rest on his lap.

"No, we don't need Zayn catching us doing that. We need to trust he won't go there. I'm sure Matt would have thought about that before telling him and made sure the house was a safe place." Niall looks out the window trying to sift through all the thoughts in his head.

He was going to have to see what state Zayn was in before they knew what to do with the kids and they would have to find time to sit everyone down and tell them what's going on. He was sure they all knew by now that something had kicked off and they wouldn't wait around for too long to find out why Matt and Zayn had fallen out so badly considering they never really fight.

He would have to work out some kind of system to make sure someone was always with Zayn but also keep the kids lives as normal as possible. Rae would have to be told too, if Zayn was going to make Matt leave, he would have to be there for him during that too. Elliott probably wouldn't notice anything had changed but Rae was going to understand what it means and that one of her daddies would be leaving the house.

By the time they pulled up at Zayn's house Niall had worked himself into more of a panic but was keeping himself together quite well.

"You ready?"

"Yep." Harry let go of his hand turning the car off.   
They both climbed out the car walking quickly up the path Harry's hand firmly placed on Niall's lower back the touch keeping Niall calm and collected.

Liam has the door open before they reach it, worry all over just face as he steps to the side to let them in.

"He is still downstairs. House is mostly cleaned up, I felt pretty useless so i just kept shoving stuff in bin bags." Niall keeps walking while Harry stops to hug Liam and thank him for staying.

"Can you guys tell me what's going on?" Niall keeps himself busy with unlocking the door so he doesn't have to look at Liam. He feels bad keeping something so big from him but this is Zayn's thing to tell not his.

Harry answers him, taking him down the hallway and into the kitchen as Niall opens the door and goes down the steps.

The main room his empty, completed pieces of Zayn's work laid out on the table or packaged up ready to be posted. Niall walks past it all using the key again to go into the paint room.

Zayn is stood in the middle, head bow down and back heaving. The room is completely silent the sound of the door shutting behind Niall making him jump. Zayn stays completely still, the floor around him covered in paint, cans scattered around him. The walls are covered too, Zayn's latest project destroyed with splatter marks. Niall steps forward feet slipping slightly on the paint as he makes his way towards Zayn.

There is paint over his arm, slowly dripping down and off his fingers. The colours mixing together to make some kind of disgusting green brown combination that Niall will probably never forget the look of. The room smells so strongly off it that Niall has to blink back tears, throat drying up as he breaths it in.

Niall stands in from of Zayn who keep looking down showing no sigh that he even knows Niall has come into the room.

Niall swallows, grimacing at the taste in his mouth. He had no idea what type of paint Zayn used or if it was even safe to breath it and be all over his skin. He mostly made Niall wear a mask over his mouth and nose when he came down here to watch him work and he was strict about the kids coming down so Niall guessed it wasn't.

Zayn slowly looked up, eyes meeting Niall's.   
Another thing Niall thinks he will never forget, the look that flashes in Zayn's eyes. 

Paint is smeared across his face from where he had been rubbing at his eyes, red tear tracks down each cheek. His eyes bloodshot and filled with what Niall can only think of as guilt.

Niall bite down on his lip, shaking his head pointing at him.

"Don't, you don't feel guilty for what he done." Niall voice wobbles and it seems to set Zayn off. A great sob escaped him as he covered his face with his hands, smearing even more paint over himself. He mumbles something incoherent though his hands, shoulders heaving as his body shook with the sudden onslaught of sobs and tears.

Niall steps forward pulling Zayn into him, his face pushed into his shoulder as he carried on saying things Niall couldn't understand through his crying, whinging and whimpering between words.

Eventually his legs give out and Niall gently lowers them to the floor pulling Zayn onto his lap and cradling his head in his arms, lips pressed to his forehead as he let's it all out.

Niall closes his eyes, his own tears falling onto Zayn's face and mixing with his. He has never seen Zayn like this before and although he was expecting it it still comes as a shock.

Zayn was not necessarily the strong one but he was the one they always seemed unbothered by things. He was good at putting on the I don't care attitude so well that Niall did sometimes forget that actually he cared so strongly about everything he just knew to expect it to go wrong so protected himself.

His marriage, the love him and Matt shared, his family, they where the only times Niall saw Zayn truly care and let himself freely be happy. Because he never thought he had a reason to protect himself from them things.

Now they were here and once again Zayn was broken and this time it was the person he trusted to never break him. The person he happily handed his heart over to. To protect and love and nurture.

Niall kept wiping at his face, using his top to try and clear it of paint. He had no idea what he could say to make Zayn feel even the slightest bit better so he just stayed quite, slowly laying down on the floor and pressing himself to Zayn as much as he could. His jeans were soaked, so was his top and he was sure it was in his hair and all over his skin but he could worry about that later, take them both back upstairs to wash it all away only when Zayn was ready to move.

Zayn started snuffling, trying to stop his tears as he brought his hand up to try and wipe them away. Niall battered his hand away with a frown, wondering if Zayn even realised he was caked in paint, and wiped them himself making soothing sounds when Zayn start whimper again.

Every time Niall thought he was calming down, taking deep harsh breaths to try and settle his breathing Zayn would just let out another loud body shaking sob and lose it all over again.

Niall can't imagine what it must be like. To find out that someone you love more then anything has done something so cold and evil.

He had no idea what Matt had actually told him but he imagines it was the whole lot.

Lying about going away for work and instead tracking down someone from Niall's past with the aim to get rid of him. Continuing to lie to them all, knowing exactly what was happening as they all got scared.   
He hurt the people he was supposed to love. Niall would not be able to cope if he found out Harry had gone behind his back and hurt everyone including him.

He pulled Zayn closer to him again, his hand slipping under the back of his top to rub over his back while he kissed around his face wherever he could. Zayn slowly relaxed against him, hands clutching tightly at Niall's side, breathing deeply out of his nose as he once again started to calm. 

When Niall was sure he was not going to break down again he slowly sat up. Zayn blinked up at him, eyes red and lost as he moved with Niall letting him pull him up to his feet.

Niall curled his hand around the back of Zayn's neck, pushing his fingers up into his hair, the stands stuck together.

"Come on." He slid his hand down to Zayn's and walked forward stopping with his arm tugged back. He looked behind him giving him a small smile.   
"I'm gonna take care of ya. Come with me love." Zayn let Niall lead him out the room, stopping and waiting as Niall paused to lock the door. He would come back down later with some help to clean all the mess up.

Niall wrapped his arm around Zayn's waist as they slowly made their way up the stairs, Zayn leaning against his side and turning to press his head to Niall's.

Niall gave him a quick squeeze then unlocked the door and lead them out.

Harry looked distraught the second his eyes landed on Zayn but he kept quite and kept his distance as Niall walked them down the hallway. Liam came out the kitchen and looked like he was about to rush up to them but Harry held his hand out and shook his head. Liam stopped, fist clenching as he fought with the need to go help his friend as Niall led him up the stairs and into the bathroom. 

"I've got to clean us up." Zayn just stared back at him as he lowered him to sit on the seat of the toilet before turning to start a bath, squirting some of the kids bubble solution into the running water.

He glances at Zayn before leaving the room to quickly grab a couple of towels and a wash cloth heart slamming from leaving Zayn even for the short time it took.

He heart settles a bit when he is back in the room with him. He places the towels by the side of the bath before going back over to Zayn to remove his top. Zayn lifts his arms up eyes closing when Niall pulls it over his face. He puts it into the sink, paint marking the pristine white. They would probably be finding paint on things for days.

Niall takes his one top of next then turns back to the bath to check the temperature.

He slips out of jeans, the material sticking to his legs as he tugs.   
Niall has to stand Zayn up to get his jeans down, lifting his feet for him to get them off all the way before balling them up with his own to go in the sink too. Zayn stays standing, body swaying slightly as he watches Niall fill the sink with water to start soaking their clothes.

This was more scary to Niall then if Zayn was still trashing the place. He would rather screaming Zayn then this silent cut off one. At least he would have some idea of what he was thinking.

Niall's hands are shaking as he stops the taps, dipping his fingers in to check the temperature again before taking Zayn's elbow and leading him over to the tub.

Niall steps in first then helps Zayn in before they both sink down, boxers sticking to them straight away.

Zayn settles down between Niall's legs, turning onto his side resting his cheek on his chest as Niall starts to run the washcloth over his arms and neck scrubbing a little harder at the ends of his hair.

The water turns a murky brown as Niall washes both them trying his best to not move Zayn around to much we he cups water in his hands to wet his hair rubbing at the paint to get it away from the black strands.

Zayn let's out a sigh suddenly, shoulder slumping and his grip on Niall getting tighter. Niall pushed his lips against the top of his hair, water soaking his lips, his feet pushing between Zayn's legs.

"It's everything." Niall lays his head back against the bath, turning it to the side to face the wall. "Everything." Niall's mouth twist with the effort to not start crying, a dull throb in his chest as Zayn talks tuning his body more until his stomach is pressed to Niall's.

"Is this all my fault. Everything that happened?"

"How could you think that?" Zayn rested his chin on Niall's chest looking up at him, eye still red and swollen from where he had been rubbing at them.

"He said he done it because of me. I shouldn't have ever told him about my feelings for you. It wasn't even necessary at the time, you were not here and we were not even friends. I just felt like I had to be honest. Some thing are better left unsaid I guess and now everything that happened is my fault. I've lost everything." Niall shakes his head, smiling sadly down at him.  
"It's not your fault. He made the choice to do it, he could have just told you how he was feeling. He should have. Harry know how you feel and he isn't out tryin to get rid of you is he. Matt and Landon are the ones to blame nobody else."

"What do I do now?" Niall stokes down his face, Zayn closing his eyes and leaning into the touch. 

"That's up to you. Whatever you decide to do I will support you all the way."

"Will you ever forgive him? Could it ever go back to how it was before?"

"No, not for me. But I want you to make your own choice. You being happy makes me happy so don't think about what you think I want you to do."

"I don't think--I couldn't even look at him Ni, I felt so disgusted and hurt. God it hurts so much."

"I know love."

"I should have know. I don't get this kind of stuff. This perfect life with the perfect husband and big house doesn't fit me. I'm the screw up. The messed up kid. I should have know it would end. It always ends." Zayn pushes himself up, water dripping over Niall as he climbs out of the bath grabbing a towel to wrap around him.

"He told me what Landon done to you. That's rape right?" Niall looks away hands gripping the side of the bathtub.

"Jesus fuck Ni. I can't forgive him for that. I believe that if he knew it was going to happen then he would have stopped it. But he didn't know and he was the reason Landon was here he was the reason Landon got the chance to do that to you." Zayn looks down at his feet.

"It's over. It has to be over. But i just love him so much. What if it never stops hurting" Niall gets out the bath, water sloshing over the side in his haste to get Zayn back in his arms.

"I'm sorry you have to deal with this." Zayn shakes his head wiggling out of Niall's arms.

"You not supposed to be sorry for anything Niall. Not when I am the reason for all of this happening to you." Zayn leaves the bathroom the door to his bedroom slamming shut seconds later. Niall sighs picking up his towel and drying himself down and removing his wet boxers before tying it around his waist.

He knocks on Zayn's door before slowly opening it to go inside. Zayn is dressed in just his jeans a set of clothes laid out on the bed for Niall to use. 

"I told ya its not your fault. It not fair for you to think like that. You're a victim too. He lied to you, he drugged you Z, he is the reason Rae got put in hospital. Don't blame yourself and don't think you can start pushing me away. We are in this together right?" Zayn glances at him before nodding his head, pointing to the cloches on the bed and turning his back.

"Get dressed." Niall drops his towel getting dressed into Zayn's clothes, the trousers a little long on his leg. 

"You know where the kids are? Did he take them?"

"No, River got them when she came over. They are fine." Zayn nods, hands on his hips as he turns back to face Niall.

"Yeah for now. I guess we have to tell everyone."

"Only if you want to." Niall goes over to Zayn placing his hands on his shoulders and looking him right in the eyes.

"We do whatever you want. If you want to just keep it to yourself for a bit then that is your right." Zayn looks at Niall's hand on his, lips turned down. 

"He thinks my feeling for you are getting stronger. He actually thought it was possible for me to love you more then him. I never thought I gave him a reason to believe that. I fucking worship him. He is my whole bloody universe and he gave me everything I never thought I would get. Maybe I did not show it enough. Maybe I was not kind enough or loving enough. I must have done something really wrong to make him think it was possible that I could leave him. He has all my heart, every fucking part of it is his, and yeah there is a piece of it that he has to share. I gave some of it to you Ni, but he has all of it." His chin trembled, he started swiping at his eyes but the tear fells anyway falling quickly down his face dripping from his chin. Niall pulls him in, hand gripping the back of his head as he held him tightly, Zayn holding back just as strong sobbing into Niall's shoulder, his body heaving with each gasp of breath. 

Niall couldn't believe how unfair all this felt. What Zayn and Matt had was perfect, even with Zayn's feeling for Niall in the mix it was still perfect and just like that it had all been taken away from him. Niall couldn't imagine suddenly losing Harry, it must be like the person dying. To just suddenly have that go.

"I'm so sorry love. I wish I could take this for you, I hate that you feel this way. I hate him for doing this to you." Out of all the things Matt and Landon done together this is the one that Niall wishes away the most. He can take what Landon done to him, will take it again and again if it meant Zayn would come out of this without his heart torn to pieces. 

"I'm sorry for all the things that you went through too. I wish I stabbed the fucker in the heart. Or like his throat and just watched him fucking choke on his blood." Niall pulled back, using his hand to wipe at Zayn face. 

"I want to tell everyone today. I just want to get it over and done with and they deserve to know that Matt played a part in all this. He said he had nothing to do with Cassie, but really he is at fault for it all. So I need to do that." 

"OK. I will go downstairs and get in contact with them all. You finish getting dressed." Zayn nods going over to the wardrobe. He grabs one on Matt tops, hesitating before pulling it on lifting the collar to his nose. 

"I don't know how to be me without him." Niall thinks that is exactly how he would feel if he did not have Harry. 

"I know." Zayn closes the wardrobe door taking a deep shaky breaths, shoulders rolling. 

"Right, well you go get everyone over and I will be done soon."

"You sure you're OK on your ow-"

"Please Ni, just give me a second. I will be down soon." Niall backs out the room, every nerve in his body screaming at him to stay in the room and be there for Zayn. He forces himself to keep moving, closing the door and making his way to the stairs. 

Before he reaches the bottom he hears Zayn. He stops and sits on the bottom step head falling into his hands as the sound of wailing and suffering echo around him.


	35. Chapter 35

There are a lot of things Niall wishes he could do differently. If he had the ability to go back in time and remember how he felt after doing a certain thing or what the consequence of his actions had been, there were a number of things he would change.

That time he was eleven and his mum would not let him go down to the park with Greg and his mates, he would not tell her what a horrible unfair mother she was.

He would go back to a time when his mother was alive, just before she got sick and he would tell her everything he wished he could tell her now. How good she was. How right she got it. How he would spend the rest of his life making her proud. How much he loved her, cherished her. How it was all going to be OK, they can get through anything as a family and they would be fine.

He would go back to Greg telling him he was leaving and maybe be a bit more understanding, take the time to talk to him and find out what he was thinking and feeling.

He would be more patient with his dad.

He would never have let a drug so much as touch his hand.

He would never hurt Liam and Harry the way he did.

He would have fought harder.

He would have never given himself the chance to meet Landon. Just smile and politely decline Daisy's offer of a place to stay and work then keep moving on.

What would he have done about Zayn?  
Would he have kept away. Kept their relationship as bully and victim. Never let him have a chance to fall in love with him. Let him carry on with his life until Matt swooped in to save him from it all, let them have a life where Zayn didn't have to sit him down and explain that he was a little in love with another man.

Or would he have done it all the same, minus the drugs and the drama.

He couldn't imagine his life being anywhere as good as it is now without Zayn. It would be happy and still so amazing but a part of him would be gone.

If he had know and got to talk to Matt first then it would never have got to this point.

Seems ignorance is not always bliss.

Not when your married best friend is in love with you anyway.

"You think they are alright up there?" Niall turns away from the window to look at Liam as he comes into the lounge, head tilted back as he looks up at the ceiling.

"I should think so." Zayn had called Harry up the stairs about twenty minutes ago, he had no idea what they could talking about.

"What's going on Ni?" Niall sucks his bottom lip into his mouth, teeth scraping along his skin before releasing it. Liam let's out a sigh rubbing at the back of his neck as he walks over to stand by Niall's side. "Is Zayn going to be alright?"

Niall loves Liam and Zayn's friendship. If he did not know them as well as he did he would think they hate each other. Always making biting comments at each other, eye rolls and looks of annoyance. Both too stubborn to drop the high school attitude. When it comes down to it Liam is so fiercely protective of Zayn that Niall is sure he would commit murder on anyone who dared to so much as look at Zayn in the wrong way. Liam can joke about Zayn being an arsehole and Liam can act like being in Zayn's presence is nothing but an annoyance but as far as Liam is concerned everyone else better act like the sun shines out his arse.

"He will be. I think." Louis car pulls up in the driveway followed but Macy's before Liam gets a chance to ask anything else. Niall leaves Liam to let them all in and goes upstairs to let Zayn know everyone has arrived.

The door to his bedroom is open and little and Niall can see him and Harry sat on the end of the bed. They are facing each other, heads bent together as the talk in voices to low for Niall to hear. He stops to watch them for a while not wanting to break the moment for them yet.

Harry says something that makes Zayn's lips twitch in an almost smile and bump his forehead against Harry's. Harry lifts one of Zayn's hands up to place a kiss to his knuckles, his other hand pushing back some of his hair.

The sound of everyone downstairs grows louder as they all step into the house so Niall moves forward pushing the door open more to let them know he was there. They both look up Harry smiling when he sees Niall.

"Everyone is here." Zayn nods then gets up, hand still held in Harry's his other reaching out for Niall.

"You sure you want to do this now?" Niall asks as he takes Zayn's hand into his.

"Yeah. No point waiting right, they probably already know something is wrong anyway." Harry gives him a reassuring smile before getting up to tug Niall out into the hallway closing the door behind in a little.

"You OK?" Niall nods giving Harry a reassuring smile while taking his hand.

"Good. I just wanted to quickly warn you before we go down that Zayn has decided to tell everyone about his feelings for you. They are going to want to know why Matt done this and it's the reason so... "

"It makes sense. I'm fine with it as long as you are. Will it bother you having Liam know that?"

"No, as long as it doesn't change things for their friendship. Not sure Zayn could deal with that right now."

"Deal with what?" Zayn comes out the bedroom, old baggy jumper hanging off him making him look delicate and small. Niall drops Harry's hand to take Zayn's instead, Harry grabbing the other.

"Nothing babes. You ready to go do this?" Zayn takes a deep breath then steps forward Niall and Harry following him down the stairs.

Louis laugh is bouncing around the room and the girls voices are floating softly around as they all talk. Zayn falters for a second his grip on both Harry and Niall's hands tightening. Zayn looks up at Harry his eyes wide and scared.

"You can wait if you want to." Zayn looks down, eyebrows furrowed together then he steps forward hand slipping from Niall's as he opens the door to the living room.

They are all squashed onto one sofa, apart from Liam who has taken Niall's seat at the window looking at the door obviously waiting for Zayn. Nolan's pushchair is in the corner of the room and Niall can see his small foot poking out the end.

River notices them first, mouth snapping shut halfway trough talking as Zayn rounds the side of the sofa and sits down on the coffee table, knees almost touching Louis.

The rest stop and turn to face them as Harry and Niall sit either side of Zayn, arms wrapping around his waist.

"Where are the kids?" River shuffles forward on the sofa looking nervous.

"My mum is with them. They where happy to stay with her, I hope that's OK. It's just Niall said it would be best to keep them away." Zayn tries to smile at her but it's more of a grimace. Rivers face falls a little.

"That's fine. Thank you."

"What going on?" Liam speaks up from the window. Niall had to admit he has been rather patient all day.

Zayn's head drops down, his hands twisted together on his lap as he takes a few moments to get his words together. Louis shifts on his seat giving Harry a worried look, his hand reaching for Cassie.

"Where's Matt? Shouldn't he be here?" Zayn's head snaps up to look at Macy and Niall notices the small wobble of his chin before he clenches his jaw.

"Is he OK? You look like your about to tell us he died." Louis let out a small laugh his eyes flicking between then three sat in front of him.

"Hunny?" Cassie pats Zayn's knee with her free hand. "Why are you looking like that kid curled up on my sofa?"

"Probably because I feel like him." Niall leaned his head on Zayn shoulder wanting nothing more then to change all this for him.

"Mate, you're making me really nervous here." Liam gets up and moves to stand behind the sofa hands clutched behind his neck. Zayn straightens his back eyes fixed on the wall behind Liam.

"Matt was working with Landon." Complete silence greets Zayn's words, all five pairs of eyes staring blankly back at Zayn. Louis is the first to react, clearing his throat and leaning forward.

"Sorry what?" Zayn's shoulders slump again and he turns to look at Harry. Harry squeezes his side pressing his lips to the side of his head in a small kiss before he speaks for him.

"Matt was the one who got Landon here. They planned all the stuff with Niall, and with Zayn. Matt was responsible for it all."

"Are you actually being fucking serious?"

"Lou, I don't think Zayn need us getting angry right now." Louis scoffs at Harry turning to Cassie with a look of disbelief.

"Well how else are we supposed to feel. Like this is not some joke? Because this make no bloody sense."

"Why would he want to do something like that?" River asks. Zayn glances at Niall before dropping his gaze down to his hands.

"Well umm, the thing is." He sighs rubbing at his face before clenching his hands together again. "I've been in love with Niall for quite a while and I guess he was not coping with it as well as I thought."

"You what now?" Liam crosses his arms eyes narrowing slightly at Zayn.

"It's not like a big deal or anything." Zayn shifts uncomfortably as they all look at him in disbelief. "It's always been there since school. Matt has always known but I guess since Niall came back it got harder for him, I don't really know."

"Just hold the fuck up." Louis holds his hands up stopping Zayn from talking. "So you're in love with Niall and Matt thinks it's OK to go to some fucking mental person to what? What was his plan? Because that's some fucked up shit and I can't really connect that with Matt."

"He wanted to scare me." All heads snap towards Niall. "They wanted me to believe someone was following me and that you guys where not safe because if it. When it didn't work as quickly as they thought they started leaving the drugs around for Zayn and then Matt spiked his drink at the party."

"Matt done that to you?" Macy asks voice wobbling slightly.

"Yeah he did." Zayn searches for Niall's hand on the table, clutching in tightly when he finds it. Niall watches Liam track their movements chin jutting out, face going hard. Zayn explains the rest to them. River slumps back in the chair hands covering her face, Macy falling back with her Liam's hand resting on her head.

"I just can't believe he could even think to do all this. Its Matt, how is he capable of doing this and saying nothing. Even after Rae was drugged and Landon sent them thugs into my home he just said nothing." Cassie swipes at her tears as they fall. Louis let's out angry huff pulling her into a hug kissing her shoulder.

"There was nothing was there? No sign at all that he knew what was going on. That's some really cold hearted shit, to do that to someone he loves and not show a single fucking sign that he was the instigator in the whole bloody thing. Matt is not like that, he is kind and he would never want to hurt us. How could he?" Liam shakes his head moving away from the sofa.

"Did he know Landon was going to take you that night? He knew we where all ignoring you and we were all pissed." Liam voice is dripping in venom. Niall always found Liam a little terrifying when he got angry. He didn't make it obvious like Louis did. He was quite and thoughtful until suddenly he let it all out. Then it was like a hurricane was going through the room.   
"He fucking knew we wouldn't go to you or answer your calls for hours. He knew there was a chance Landon could take you away and be god knows where before we even thought to come to you. Something really happened that night. He done something to you, did Matt know? Whatever it was did he know it was going to happen? Did he fucking let it happen because I swear to god Niall I will fucking end him if he did."

"No, he knew I had found out and that Landon had me but he didn't know what he was going to do."

"There were a few things he didn't know Landon had planned. Things that would not have happened if he knew." Zayn cuts in. Liam glares at him finger jabbing toward his chest.

"Well there is a lot more that wouldn't have happened if you didn't love people your not entitled to love." Zayn jolts back, face crumbling at Liam's words. Harry stands up hands protectively resting on Zayn's shoulder.

"This is not Zayn;s fault at all. He was honest with Matt which was the right thing to do. It's not his fault Matt got paranoid and didn't talk to him about it."

"So you're fine with it? You just going to accept him feeling like that towards Niall?"

"Yes i am actually. I trust them both. Niall doesn't feel the same back and Zayn wants Matt and only Matt. This changes nothing between you all and Zayn because it's noting to do with the rest of you."

"I agree."Louis gets up. "Zayn's feelings are not what we should even be focusing on right now. We should be thinking about what we are going to do because Matt can't get away with this."

"Louis' right, we have to do something." Niall looks between Liam and Louis as they both go into a rant about Matt then quickly turns to face Zayn who looks closer and closer to snapping.

"Guys I think we should just calm down. Its understandable if you're all angry." Niall tries to reason, tries to settle everyone down for Zayn sake.

"Angry?" Louis rounds on Niall, eyes wild. "I'm more then fucking angry! You saw what they done to Cassie, she doesn't even have anything to do with Zayn and his feelings for you yet somehow she ended up being the one beaten in her own fucking home. Matt is our friend someone we love and trust and he done that! I'm fucking livid Niall. He needs to pay for what he done we can't just sit around and bloody cry about it. I mean how the hell did he even want to do this. We are fucking family."

"Shut the fuck up." Zayn speaks so calmly, hands clenched around the side of the coffee table. Louis stops blinking over to him in surprise. Niall sighs dropping his head into his hand.   
"I didn't tell you all so you could go off on one. I told you because I thought you deserved to know and I wanted your support. Matt is my husband. This is my marriage. I get to be angry, I get to decide what happens next. What happened to Cassie was horrible but that was not on Matt. Landon done that because he was fed up with your shit, because he took an extra dislike to you." Louis steps back shaking his head.   
"I understand why you all feel angry and hurt. You're right Lou, Matt is like family to you but he is my actual family. He is my happy ever after and now that's gone so if you could maybe think about how I'm feeling over yourself that would be great because I really don't need to sit here and listen to you talk all this shit. My heart is shattered and it really, really hurts."   
They all surge forward at once and Niall has no idea who he even has his arms wrapped around but it doesn't matter because they are all sad right now and Zayn's not the only one sniffing back tears as they all clamber onto the coffee table and hold each other tightly, Zayn lost somewhere in the middle of it all.

Xxxxxx

The girls leave a couple of hours later, all going to River's flat to help with the kids and put them to bed.

Niall and Liam both go down to Zayn's art room armed with all the cleaning supply's they can find, leaving Zayn dozing on Harry's lap while him and Louis talk quietly to each other.

Niall puts on a mask to cover his mouth and nose the smell of paint hitting him before he even steps into the room.

"Jesus." Liam heads straight to the far wall starting to unhook the canvas hanging up. Niall starts with the floor dipping a brush into a bucket of soapy water.

He can feel Liam's eyes on him as they both silently work at cleaning the room, wanting there to be no reminders of today when Zayn comes down here next.

He knows Liam wants to talk about Zayn's feelings for him and its making his skin prickle a bit knowing its coming.

"Just come out with it will ya? Doing my head in." Liam stops, glancing over at Niall again before shaking his head and looking away.

"You're not in a weird three way relationship right? Cause dad seems way to chill about it all." Niall drops the brush to the floor sitting back on his knees eyebrows raised at Liam as he slips his mask down to his chin.

"No. Defiantly not. I don't think he is as chill as you think. It does bother him a little but it's like he said, he trusts me and he also trusts Zayn. It's not like I'm going to go off with him is it?"

"Better not be." Niall bites his lip to stop himself from grinning as Liam gives him what he thinks is supposed to be a threatening look.

"You feeling a bit protective there mate?" Liam huffs turning his back on Niall to go back to cleaning. Niall watches him for a bit thinking the conversation is done with as he too gets back to work.

They don't talk again for a while, both moving around the room doing the best they can to get rid of all the drying paint around the room. Niall is stacking up empty paint pots when Liam comes to stand next to him reaching out to stop Niall from bending down again.

"You are like a brother to me and I love you but when it comes to it my dad is the most important person in my life. You hurt him again and I won't forgive you. You let him touch you and I will beat the shit out of him" Niall clears his throat avoiding looking at Liam.

"I know. Nothing is going to happen. He has felt like this for a really long time Liam and he has never ever made a move to do anything about it. He is not a threat to me and your dad I promise, I don't even feel anything towards him like that." Niall keeps his eyes on his shoes waiting for Liam to step back and drop the subject. Instead Liam grabs hold of Niall elbow leaning closer to his face.

"You never look at me when you lie." Niall pulls his arm out of Liam's grip but before he can reply Liam has crossed the room and left closing the door behind him with a loud thud.

Niall groans running his hands through his hair before dropping them to his sides. This was all he needs, Liam thinking he was ready to jump on Zayn at any second.

Not that he didn't expect Liam to be like this when he found out about it. He would probably feel the same.

Niall avoids going back upstairs and instead wonder's around the room cleaning things that are already clean and reorganising some of Zayn's supplies hoping he is not messing with anything important.

He has no idea how much time has passed when Harry comes into the room looking ruffled and sleepy as he shuffles over to Niall arms reaching for him eagerly. Niall let's himself be pulled into him easily shoulders relaxing as soon as Harry's smell hits him.

"You hiding?"

"Yeah." Harry tilts Niall's chin up, leaning down to press their lips together. Niall grips his waist moving his lips softly against Harry's, whining a little when Harry cups the back of his neck and deepens the kiss a little tongue swiping over his bottom lip.

Harry pulls away first, pressing three more small pecks to Niall's lips.

"Liam's not very happy about this Zayn thing."

"Is that why you are still down here? Avoiding him."

"Yeah a little. Avoiding the sadness a bit too. Hate seeing Zayn like this, hate all of it." Harry sighs sadly rubbing his hand over Niall's back as they hug.

"We decided to sleep over tonight. Zayn is already asleep so me and Lou dragged a couple of mattresses down so we could all crash in the lounge with him. Want to go cuddle and fall asleep?" The mention of falling asleep makes Niall realise how tired he actually is, body weighed down by it as him and Harry leave the room turning the lights off and locking up behind them. He is relived they will be spending the night and staying close to Zayn, there is no chance he would have gotten a single wink of sleep had he gone home tonight. The thought of Zayn here alone in such a big space was so sad. It was a thought that Niall might have to get used to. 

Liam and Louis are settling down onto one of the mattresses when him and Harry come back into the room. Harry throws Niall a pair of Zayn's pyjama bottoms helping him out of his clothes and into the baggy too big cotton trousers.

Liam mutters something to Louis that Niall misses and makes Louis give Liam a dead leg before flopping onto his side facing away from him. Harry laughs quietly tugging Niall down and under the blanket tucking him in tightly before getting himself ready.

Niall is asleep before Harry joins him and when he wakes up a few hours later Liam is curled up against his back and Zayn has wiggled between him and Harry, head curled under Harry's arms. Niall throws his legs over Liam's, reaching over Zayn for Harry's hand before falling back to sleep his heart giving a small tug when Harry squeezes back.


	36. Chapter 36

Niall jolts awake to the sound of something shattering on the floor then footsteps thudding past him. There is a shout that has Niall sitting up and clambering up from the mattress and tangled mess of sheets. By the time he is up and aware enough of what is going on Louis already has Matt on the floor Harry pulling at him as he shouts for Liam to get Zayn out the room.

Niall runs over to help Harry grabbing the back of Louis top and pulling as hard as he can as Louis lands punch after punch to Matt face.

"Lou that's enough. He has had enough!" They finally pull Louis away, Harry placing himself between them has Matt groans on the floor clutching at his face.

Zayn is still in the room fighting against Liam to get to Matt.

"What the hell are you doing lou?"

"No its fine." Matt sits up, blood dripping from his nose and onto his lap. His lip is split, teeth stained with blood and blood is smeared across his forehead too. "It's what I deserve."

"That is not even half of what you desevers mate."

"This is not what I want." Zayn has broken free of Liam's hold and crosses the room quickly to kneel down by Matt holding his face gently in his hands. Matt leans into his touch, eye fluttering closed as Zayn swipes his thumb across the bottom of his lip.

"Can someone get somthing for me to clean him up please." Nobody makes a move to help so Niall leaves the room to grab a tea towel from the kitchen soaking it under the tap. His hands are shaking as he rinses it out. The adrenaline of waking up to chaos making his heart beat too fast.

When he gets back into the lounge the atmosphere is unbearably tense as Zayn keeps Matt close to him swiping the towel out of Nialls hand to start wiping away the blood.

"Your hand OK?" Louis looks down at his hand shaking it out before clenching it into a fist.   
"All good."  
"Good. You really need to stop hitting people so much."  
"People need to stop pissing me off."

Matt looks up at Louis pulling Zayns hands away from him as he gets to his feet.

"Like I said I deserv-" Harrys arms snaps forward punching Matt straight in the nose sending him back to the floor.

"Harry!" Harry smiles sheepishly at Niall, holding his fist in his hand.

"I didn't mean to honestly." Niall rolls his eyes helping Zayn get matt back on his feet which earns him an annoyed scoff from Louis.

"What are you doing here?" Zayn asks stepping back from him as soon as he is steady on his feet, blood starting to run from his nose and lip again.

"I need some more of my stuff and I was hoping to see the kids. I didn't realise your bodyguards would be here." Niall bristles.

"Where else would we be." Matt laughs, wiping at his lip.

"You're right. You are always so far up his arse I should have known."

"Hey!" Liam steps in front of Niall. "I don't think you should really be the one with the attitude right now you areshole." Matt sighs, slumping against the wall.

"Sorry, it's been a shit twenty four hours."

"It's been pretty shit for us too thanks to you, you paranoid fuck." Louis snips attempting to step past Harry again.

"Paraniod? I'd like to see you watch Cassie fall more in love with her besfriend each day and not do what I did to stop it."

"That's not true, that was not happening Matt. Why won't you belive me, why do you think I could do that to you?"

"Because I was watching you Zayn. That is all I had to do. Even Harry started to notice it so obviously it was getting stronger for you. And you probably forgot but I was in the room when you two fucked, and I was not bloody blide." Liam turns slowly to look at Niall mouth hanging open,  
Louis' head snapping back and forward between Niall and Zayn.   
"Dude, what the hell did you just say?" Harry drops his head into his hands with a groan and Niall is starting to wish Harry hit Matt a little harder.

"You and Zayn had sex?" Liam steps towards him, the look on his face making Niall stumble back hands held out in front of him.   
"It's not as bad as it sounds."   
"Really? I really would like to hear the reasoning behind that Ni." Niall looks to Harry sending him what he hopes in an apologetic look.  
"Harry was there OK. It was like a thing. A group thing. Matt had sex with me too. And Harry. Oh god it was planned and everyone agreed so I didn't cheat. Nobody cheated, it was nothing bad. Like a foursome but they only had sex with me and I swear it was discussed before, can someone please stop me from talking this is incredibly akward."

"Thats true." Matt moves away from the wall. "Harry was there and it wasn't cheating and I had spoken and met with Landon long before that, which I regret so fucking much by the way and if I could change it then I would. But that night I saw it Zayn. They way you looked at him, the way he looked back at you. It wasn't just a fun little fuck for you was it? It wasn't about putting on a show for me. It was about you finally getting to be with him, even if it was a one off. I saw it. Even when you were with me and kissing me you couldn't take your eyes off him. It made everything we had planned seem worth it. No matter what you tell yourself and everyone else you love him enough that you didn't have eyes for just me that night like I did for you. Like Harry did for Niall. You were practically making love to each other right in front of me." Niall tries to catch Harry's eye, to see any sigh that he felt the same but Harry kept his stare towards Matt and Zayn. There was no way Harry felt the same because Harry would have talked to him about it.

"I only ever wanted you." Zayn voice wavers, tears spilling over as he presses himself to Matt, hands clutching at his shirt. "I have only ever wanted you. You are everything how can you let yourself believe all that. Why couldn't you have just talked to me? Why did you have to go to him? Do all that?"

"I didn't want to lose you. I just wanted to keep you."

"If you had spoken to me then you would have kept me. But you didn't and you don't get to keep me now. You lost me. After all you have done you lost me anyway. And I have lost you."

"It doesn't have to be like that. Nobody had to lose anyone." Matt holds onto the back of Zayns head pulling him forward until their lips brush together. The moment suddenly feels so intimate and heartbreaking that Niall can't take his eyes off them even though his body is screaming at him to leave and give them space.

"It does baby. I'm sorry but it's too much."

"No, you asked for some time so I will give you time. Then we can work on it yeah, we can talk and do whatever we need to do to fix this. Please don't leave me. Don't make me leave you and the kids. Please I will do anything." Zayn shakes his head sobbing as he backs away from Matt.

"Just get what you need and go. It's over. We are over and I need you to leave." Matt presses their lips together again, his fingers curling into Zayns hair.

"Please, please." Matt drops to his knees, face pressed into Zatns stomach. Niall managed to look away this time because it's too hard . To see Matt on his knees begging. To see zayn looking down at him crying and looking so torn.

Liam reaches behind him for Niall, hand frailing around in the air until Niall grabs it and holds it tightly, tugging Liam back until he can lean against his shoulder.

"I will do anything. Anything you ask of me. We made vows and it was the best day of my life and I meant every word I said and I promised to take care of you and be your husband for the rest of my life and I will. Please don't leave me. I can't-I don't want to be without you. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to mess up so badly. I just love you so much" Nialls eyes land on a smashed mug by the mattress he had been sleeping on, he had probably come very close to standing on the broken pieces when he got up from his sleep.

The shatter he heard as he woke. Maybe Louis in his haste to get to Matt or Harry as he rushed to stop Louis.

Niall focuses on that. The small pieces they would have to hoover before the kids come back. Elliott would be stumbling around the house.

"I love you too. I will always love you but you have done so much that I can't forgive. I just can't see you the same anymore. I can't have you here not now I know. Not after what you done to me and Rae."

"I didn't... I didn't hurt Rae, I would never." Niall looks back as Zayn starts trying to wiggle out of Matts grip.

"Well he hurt her and you brought him here. You invited him here and everything he done you made possible for him to do. Can you please get off me?" He looks distressed, tugging at Matts hands and turning in his grip. Harry moves forward crouching down and placing his hands over Matts.

"You need to let him go." Matt shakes his head crawling closer to Zayn.   
"This is not helping, just let him go and go upstairs to get what you need. Give him space." Matt stares at Harry then let's him remove his hands. Zayn moves as soon as he is free, heading straight into Liam's arms.

Harry stands back up helping Matt to his feet before pushing him towards the stairs.

"Be quick about it." Once Matt has gone up Harry turns to them all letting out a breath.

Niall suddenly realises he is still topless from being in bed so starts searching for a top knowing his will be gross from cleaning yesterday. Louis seems to notice what he is doing and unzips his jumper and hands it to him. Niall thanks him, slipping it on and zipping it up to his chest. Harry walks past Liam and Zayn, hand running across Zayns back then ruffling Liam's hair, and stands by Niall as they all wait for Matt to come back down.

He can hears his footsteps as he moved around his and Zayns room and he actually feels a little sorry for him. He done all this because he loves Zayn, because in his head he thought it was the only way to keep him. He loves Zayn enough to hurt the people closest to him and now he had to deal with the pain of leaving his house he shared with his kids and husband.   
It must be awful, but it was worse for Zayn.

Matt comes back down, rucksack on his back and a small duffle bag in his hand. Niall throat tightens at the sight. He done wrong but Niall still cares about him and always will in a small way. The whole thing was such a mess.

"Where are the kids?" His voice is softer now, the time upstairs must have calmed him. Zayn lifts his head from Liam's shoulder wiping at his face.

"River has them."

"Will it be OK if I go get them? I would like to spend some time with them and then I can take them to your parents until you are ready to have them back here. Just a couple of hours please?" Zayn thinks about it for a moment looking around at the others, his eyes settle on Niall before dropping to the floor.

"I'm not sure if that's a good idea." Matt pulls his bag closer to him face falling.

"I'm allowed to see them, they are my kids. I just want to give them a hug, I won't keep them for long. I could take them for a milkshake and then just drop then off at your parents."

"OK fine. Two hours at the most." Matt looks relived his hold on his bag loosening a little.

"Thank you. Maybe in a couple of days we can sit down and talk, sort things out?"

"If by sort things out you mean arranging a schedule with the kids then yes we can do that. Best to get them into a new routine as quickly as possible."

"No, that's not what I meant at all. Us Zayn, I want to sort us out."

"I think you should go now." Matt doesn't hesitate this time, knowing its best to leave before things start to get heated again. He kisses zayns cheek, keeping his lips pressed there for a moment before pulling away and leaving.

"Right." Louis runs his tumbs across his eyebrow breathing out heavily.

"Zayn you better let River know Matt is heading her way. Harry clean up that smashed mug and me and Niall will go make some breakfast and drinks. That was way too much for after being awake for ten minutes." Louis slops out of the room feet shuffling loudly as he walks down the hallway towards the kitchen. Zayn gets his phone out to text River and Harry bends down to start picking up what he can of the mug.

Niall goes into the hallway, Liam following closely. Niall already knows what he is going to say.   
"I'm sorry."  
"Why are you suddenly not telling me things. You kept Zayns feeling for you from me, you slept with him and didn't tell me and you won't tell me what happened between you and Landon. Why am I kept in the dark about everything all of a sudden?"

"I'm not doing it on purpose i swear. Zayns feelings are not my thing to go around talking about, he didn't even want me to find out so I didn't think it was my place to go and tell you. And the sex thing is probably because it involved your dad. Did you really want me to come running to you about how fucking hot it was to have you're dad share me in bed?" Liam grimaces shaking his head like he is trying to to get rid of the imagine.

"No to be honest I don't but there was a time when that wouldn't have stopped you. You used to tell me everything even if it was about you and dad. It's like the closer you and zayn get the future apart we get. I just want to still be the person you come to for things, I hate not knowing everything about you. I fucking miss how we were."

"Liam we are still the same-"

"We are not actually and if you think we are then you really are a dickhead. We will be though because it stops here right? Your going to start opening up to me again and telling me shit?"

"Yes, I promise. I will be better sorry." Liam shrugs crossing his arms.

"Don't be sorry, just talk. Tell me." Niall frowns confused about what Liam wants him to say. When he realises his stomach drops. He wants to know about Landon.

"Liam, I haven't told you because I don't want you to have to think about it."

"Its all I think about anyway. Going over all the different things he could have done to you in that time, while I sat looking at bloody wedding photos and thinking you were a twat."

"Its not your fault."

"People keep saying. Doesn't change the way I feel. If Matt can come out and tell Zayn about what he done then you can tell me. Just get it all out and we can all move on and deal with it."

"Don't you think we have delt with enough today already. Let's just help lou make breakfast. Try and have a normal day." Niall heads towards the kitchen the same time as Louis steps out looking confused with two frying pans in his hand.

"Were you raped?" Louis pauses looking up eyes going wide. "Did he make you have sex with him?" Niall focuses on the wall beside Louis head, chewing on his bottom lip.

"Did he make you have sex Niall?"

"No he didn't make me have sex with him."

"Then what did he do?"

"He made me suck his dick alright? I was tied up and I was drugged and he made me suck his dick and it's not your fault. Its nobody's fault because it was his choice to do that. If anything you helped because he was seconds away from having sex with me when you turned up. Now drop the subject and let's go make food." Niall snatches one of the frying pans from Louis, avoiding looking at him as he pushes past and into the kitchen.

Liam and Louis both come in as Niall is setting some bacon and egg on the side and switching the oven on to heat the pans up.

He waits for them to make him talk about it more and its annoying him already. Louis comes over to the counter picking up an egg throwing it in the air before catching it.

"Soooo, what does Zayns dick look like? In detail please." Niall gives him a bewildered look glancing over at Liam who gives him a small smile, eyes watery.

"Bet it was tiny right?" Niall laughs grabbing an egg and throwing it towards Liam.

Xxxx

The kids are dropped off by Zayns parents a few hours later, Zayns mum pulling him to the side and into a tight hug seconds after he has opened the door.   
The atmosphere lightens once Rae and Elliott start charging around the house over the moon to have so much attention on them. They even manage to convince Louis to sit on the floor so they can cover him in play makeup. Louis looks as equal delighted as Rae does.

River arrives not long after with Nolan, passing him over to Harry who makes grabby hands the second he spots him. Niall stomach does a spin at the sight of a baby in his arms but thankfully River pulls his attention away before it starts to makes him feel sick.

They manage to put a lunch together for them all, spreading out a picnic blanket on the floor so they can all sit and eat with the kids, Rae and Elliott fascinated by Nolan who can now roll over onto his belly.

Zayn leaves the room a few times and Niall suspects he might be going to have a cry priavetly. When he comes back into the room his face looks a little puffer but he has a smile on his face and goes straight back to playing with the kids.

"It was so strange when Matt came over this morning to get them, I didn't know if I wanted to punch him or hug him. Such a wierd thing, to hate somone but also still love them a bit." River whispers in Nialls ear as they watch Zayn help put a ribbon in Liam's hair.   
"Though by the looks of his face someone got a few punches in already."

"Yeah that was mostly Louis, Harry got one in." River laughs looking a little surprised at the information.   
"Harry? Mr sunshine."  
"I don't think he actually meant to." Harry stands up from the carpet, Nolan tucked to his chest as he carefully climbs over toys on the floor.

"This one has made a smell. Want me to go change him for you?" Harry asks picking up the changing bag by Rivers side.   
"Thanks love, I will never say no to someone else doing a nappy for once." Harry gives her a dimpled smile leaving the room to take him upstairs to Elliott's changing table.

"You getting on alright by yourself?" Niall moves a piece of Rivers hair behind her ear feeling guilty for not being around for her as much as he promised himself he would be. Also he was worried about being around even less when they moved. What if she struggled with being tired or money and he was not close enough to know and help her.

"Oh yeah, he is so amazing. Hopefully it lasts. And I don't miss being carefree all the time you know. I thought I would hate not being able to go out most nights but nothing is better then curling up on the sofa with him as he falls asleep, and I don't even mind the night feeds. I actually want him awake most the time so I can have an excuse to get him out his cot. I'm so glad I have him."

"You still doing OK with money? Everything sorted and coming in as it should? I can put the rent down a bit or if you need to miss a few months you can. Christmas is soon so I understand if you need the money for other things." River nudges his shoulder tutting.

"Will you chill out. He is a baby so I don't need to even get him much for Christmas do I. I promise I am fine, my mum is about more then I thought she would be anyway. Seems me getting pregnant is not so disappointing now there is an actual baby for her to love." Niall chuckles, relaxing slightly.

"So in conclusion you are doing great on your own."  
"Yes hunny I am doing great. This is the happiest I have ever been and I am surrounded by people who love me and would help me in a heartbeat. You don't need to worry about me at all. Your man however is taking a long time with that nappy so you might want to go check on him" Niall laughs getting to his feet.

"Lets hope it don't smell so bad he changes his mind about having one with me." Niall leaves the room and all the noise taking the steps two at a time 

"You managing love." Niall stops in Elliott's doorway his heart giving a sudden lurch when he see's Harry rocking an almost asleep Nolan in his arms, lips moving as he softly sings to him. His hands looks so big wrapped protectively around his little body, the sight making a lump form in Niall throat. 

Harry looks so good with a baby in his arms. Niall's desperation somehow manages to go up another notch. Harry turns towards Niall grinning at him as he beckons him to come into the room more. Niall walks over slowly not wanting to disturb the peaceful feeling in the room. 

"You know what I just realise?" Harry whispers.

"What?" Niall takes one of Nolan's feet in his hands running his thumb across the pad of his foot. Nolan gives a little sigh, face snuggling into Harry more. Niall is sure this baby was sent to turn him in to mush. 

"We are going to be so brilliant at looking after a baby because to keep them happy you just feed them and let them poop. That's how we keep you happy. I am so well practised." 

"Oh ha ha. Aint you hilarious. I think there might be a bit more to it then that though." Niall looks up at Harry to find him already staring back at him eyes shinning as he smiles. 

"I can't wait to do this with you, to see you be a dad." 

"Me too. God want it so badly you know. Like wish the phone would just ring right now and they just have a baby for us. Or I wish stalks delivered them like in dumbo so as soon as we wanted one it just floated down for us." Harry laughs nudging Niall with his hip before the both go back to watching Nolan. 

He could probably look at a baby all day. They do nothing particularly exciting but Niall still found something so fascinating about such a small little person. The fact they had so much to learn and would one day be a full grown functional adult was mind blowing. Nolan was so small and so delicate, Niall could not imagine him being a teenager and going off to collage. He didn't even want him to grow up. They get harder to protect when they grow up and Niall wanted to protect them all and keep them small so they could never go too far from him. 

"What Matt said was not true by the way." 

"Huh?" Niall puts his attention back to Harry, the subject throwing him off a little. 

"When you and Zayn had sex, it was not like he said. I mean, I could tell it meant something a little more to Zayn but by that point I had already started to think he might feel something for you but there was no way it was like you two where you know, making love. From what I remember you had my dick in your mouth while he was fucking you, that's no really romantic is it?" Niall laughs, face heating up at the memory. 

"You don't ever wish we didn't do it?" 

"No not really. It was super hot at the time, maybe we could do it again one day." Niall opens his mouth then closes it again not really sure what to say. Harry gives him a cheeky smile then walks towards the door.

"Wait what?"

"What? Come on let's go back down." 

"What do you mean what? Harry!" 

"Niall!" Niall narrows his eyes rushing out the room to catch him up.

"You can't say that then just walk off."

"I don't know what you are on about love." 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Niall draws the short straw on cooking for everyone. Not that he minds getting to use Zayn's over the top kitchen. He also does not mind the way Zayn has attached himself to his back watching him chop some vegetables. 

"You smell nice." 

"That is a lie because I have not washed properly since me and Harry left the cabin and we left the cabin after about three hours of sex." 

"Maybe that's why you smell nice." Niall throws some carrot peel over his shoulder at Zayn's face. 

"How you feeling anyway?Been a bit mental today." Zayn presses his nose into Niall's neck dragging it up to just below his ear.

"Sad. Been thinking about Sam. How Matt let me get attached to him even though he knew this could happen."Niall places the knife down on the copping board turning to face Zayn. 

"Maybe he was doing that to give you another reason to stay with him. Do you think they would let you have him on your own?" 

"I don't know. It would be a lot to take on when I am by myself with two other kids and I will have to make more time to paint and stuff now that I wont have Matt's income to get us by. I know he will help but i'm still going to have a lot less time now. I don't think it would be fair on Rae and Elliott to take on such a big thing when their lives are about to change." Zayn rest his hands on the counter either side of Nialls waist, Niall runs his finger over his zap tattoo chasing the small goosebumps that appear on his arm.

"You're doing alright though? You don't want to you know."

"Get high?" Niall wraps his fingers around his wrist. He feels bad for asking but it was somthing he was going to be worrying about a lot.

"To be honest yeah I wouldn't mind. Just to go outside and have a joint would be like super nice you know. I wish I could do that and not have it spiral into somthing bigger, but to be honest what I really want more is to just get into bed and fall asleep with the kids. I'm not going to anything stupid so don't worry about it. My focus is being there for Rae and Els." Zayn turns his hand over catching Nialls fingers in his and locking them together.

"He was just so perfect for us Ni, I really started to love him. He would have such a good home here with us, what if we where his only chance and now he will just be in the system until he gets older and has to take care of himself."

"You have the option to forgive Matt. I, all of us, would completly understand why and be fine with it. Don't make choices based on what you think we think. If you want that Z then just go for it."

"I don't think I can. Not for a long time anyway. It wouldn't be fair to bring another kid into the house when we are having these problems. It's just not going to happen. It really sucks that we got him and we spent all this time with him and now he's just going to be gone again. He was so right for us. I felt like he was mine." Niall feels a wet drop on his shoulder so he brings Zayn in closer to him, the hand not clutched tightly in his running a smoothing circle on his back as he cried.

Maybe River and the others are doing just fine, but how the hell were Niall and Harry supposed to leave Zayn.

Xxxxxxxx

Leaving Zayn that night was incredibly hard for them all to do, but he insisted that he didn't need another night of them camped out on his floor and he just wanted to get into his own bed with his kids and sleep.   
Niall had lingered at the doorway for ten minutes, the kids standing behind Zayn in their pyjamers ready for bed and looking half asleep, before he finally left promising to keep his phone on loud so Zayn could ring and talk to him at anytime.

He was worried sick about him but it was nice to walk back into their house and have a really long hot shower before clamouring into his own bed feeling refreshed.

Harry was still brushing his teeth so Niall grabbed the book he had been reading off the side and cracked it open, settling back against his pillow.

Minutes later Harry clambours into the bed snapping his teeth at niall before breathing his minty breath over his face. Niall swats at him eyes still on his book. Harry settles under the covers snuggling up to Nialls side, hand spread over his stomach.

"Good book?" Niall hums in reply. Harry pouts pushing his face into Niall to leave soft lazy kisses over his neck. Nialls eyes stayed glued to his book, eyebrows raising as he reads. Harry moves his fingertips in small circles on his stomach, enjoying the way the muscles jump and tense when he let's his hand wonder a little to low before moving back up to above his belly button.

"You're awfully distracting tonight. This is a good book."

"Did you write it?" Niall chuckles, turning a page.

"No." Harry smooths his tounge over his skin, the taste of Nialls apple. Bodywash still faintly on his skin.

"Then it can't be that good." Harry slips his hand under the waistband of Niall's boxers teasingly before dragging them back up to his stomach playfully poking at his belly button.

Niall grunts slapping at Harry's hand making him laugh against his neck.

"Belive it or not there are book out there not written by me that are good, better even." Harry gasps, licking up Nialls neck and up to his ear where he gently nips him with his teeth.

"Lies. It's all lies."

"Get off me ya great idiot. M'reading." Niall pushes at him with his shoulder, jolting him a little but not in any way stopping his lips from moving around his ear.

"And I'm kissing. Look at us independently amusing ourselves. Go team."

"Such an idiot."

"So you keep saying. Mean really." Harry's lips travel back down to Nialls shoulder. He keeps them pressed there for a moment, enjoying the smell and feel, before trailing along and down a little more to the small bud of Nialls nipple sucking it between his lips. Niall shifts on the bed a little but other then that doesn't acknowledge Harry at all.

"What's happening in the book then?" Harry's head peaks over the top of the book, lips glistening with spit from all the kisses he has been leaving over Niall. Niall glances at him for a second before going back to his page.

"It's about this man who smothers his really annoying fiancé to death with a pillow because he wouldn't leave him alone to read his book." Harry pouts his lips, digging his fingers into Nialls sides making him kick out and whine.

"Maybe the loving, attentive annoying fiancé just wanted to have a little fun."

"Maybe he should go in the bathroom and have some fun on his own."

"Maybe he wants to have fun with his meanie of a fiancé. Maybe he loves him so much he can't help himself."Nuall flicks the page again.

"Maybe he should get a hobbie."

"He has hobbie. His hobbie is called making Niall Horan pay attention to him. Its a good hobbie"

"What happened to independently amusing ourselves, go team?" Harry presses his face into Niall's chest, blowing a raspberry and leaving a nice slobber mark.

"Fine you keep reading your murder book, I'm gonna keep enjoying myself I shall tempt you over to the dark side soon. Smother me, so rude." Niall smiles, hiding it behind the book as Harry goes back to kissing over his chest and shoulders, hand slipping back down to his stomach again.

He tries to ignore the swoop of his stomach and the way his skin starts to prickle with heat as Harry's hand slips into his underwear, his lips working around his bellybutton.

He keeps the book covering his face so Harry can't see him biting down on his lip as he slowly pulls them down, huffing in annoyance when Niall purposefully makes it difficult for him to pull them from under his arse.

"Well at least this fella is interested in me." Niall lowers his book. He is completly naked now, dick half hard against his leg.

"Traitor." He brings the book back up, only just stopping himself for moaning out when Harry wraps his hand around him and slowly strokes him.

The things is Niall may be pretending to not be interested but he is. He is very interested. Harry knows this of course because Niall is now really hard and wet in his hand, his legs tensing and twitching with each up stroke of his hand. Harry bloody knows but he keeps his hand moving at an almost painfully slow speed.

Niall drops his book when it starts to become impossible to hold it up without smacking himself in the face with it, not even caring about losing his page as it hits the floor and snaps shut.

"Faster." Harry looks up at him, eyes wide and innocent. God he looks so beautiful it's crazy.

"No."

"Harry, I'm not gonna be able to come like this." Harry keeps the speed the same but tightens his grip which actually ends up being worse because it does feel so much better but he still doesn't think it's enough.

Harry raises himself up to to hover over Niall as he slips down the bed more, pillow ruffling up above his head. Niall spreads his legs further apart, rocking his hips up into Harry fist. Harry tuts using his free hand to press down on Niall's waist to keep him in place.

Niall feels so small laying under Harry, pinned to the bed easily with just one hand. His head is fuzzy, ears ringing and chest heaving as Harry keeps working slowly over his cock. He is so wet Niall can hear it. The wet sound of Harry spreading it down his length making the slide much easier.

"Please, please. Faster. Need more." Niall thrashes about as best he can with Harrys weight on him, trying desperately to get more from him. Harry looks down at him, lips puffy from where he has been biting and chewing at them while looking at Niall like he was about to fucking eat him.

"Kiss me. Please." He just needed something else. Somthing to add to the too slow movement on his dick to help him along. Harry leans down and pecks his lips once before raising up again. Niall whines chasing his lips with his own.

"Come on. Please." Niall looks him straight in the eye, almost completely black as he looks back. "You trying to make me beg? Please Harry. Please make me come. Please."

"You can come like this" Niall falls back onto the bed with a sob.

He feels on the edge of coming. That amazing build up. The moment you feel you stomach tighten and your dick swell a little and your whole body goes fuzzy. He feels that continously. He can feels himself about to come but Harry is not given him enough to push him over the edge.

It's the best part of coming and Niall can't work out of he is loving every second or if he is in hell.

He turns his head to the side searching for the pillow with his teeth, his legs thrashing about as wave after wave of pleasure washes over him. The ringing in his ears gets louder, the heat on his skin leaving a layer of sweat all over him.

"Make me come, make me come, make me come. Please!"

"You look so good like this baby. Fuck, you should see yourself. So worked up, so desperate. Just from my hand. I should fuck you like this. So slow you can't come. " Niall sobs, chest heaving with it, face pushing into the pillow moan after moan tumbling from his lips.

"Please, I need to come so badly. So badly." Niall looks back up at Harry, cheeks wet from tears, small droplets of sweat dripping down the side of his face. 

"Such a good boy. Come for me." Harry gives a sudden hard jerk to Nialls cock and it's just what he needs. He feels it rush over him, his balls tightening and his dick twitching as his orgasm hits him.   
His back arches of the bed, legs going straight and stiff as he comes over his stomach all the way up to his neck. His mouth open in a silent scream as he keeps coming and coming. Harry holds him through it, keeping his hand moving as he watches Niall come undone arching up into him as his hands twist and pull at the sheet beneath him.

When he finally stops he falls boneless to the bed, eyes still wide and mouth still hanging open. He doesn't even seem to notice when Harry starts pumping at his own dick coming quickly over Nialls leg with a grunt.

Harry lays down next to Niall, patting at his face with a dopey smile.   
"You with me babe?" Niall attempts to answer but just makes a sounds that is mixed between a whine and a gurgle making Harry laugh softly and kiss his cheek.

Niall has not had an orgasm that intense for a really long time. He feels heavy with it but at the same time so light he could float.

He didn't even know he had needed it, but he really had. Once again it seemed Harry was a few steps ahead of Niall with his own emotions and needs.

Harry cleans him up then tucks them both into the bed after switching the lamp off.

"Does that book still seem more interesting then me?" Niall laughs weakly snuggling back into Harry.

"I love you." Harry kisses his shoulder, tangling their legs together under the sheet.

"I love you too baby. My whole world. Love you so much." Niall smiles letting himself go slack in Harry's arms as he drifts of to sleep.


	37. Chapter 37

It takes another two weeks for things to start feeling a little more normal again.

Harry is back to work and their home life routine seems to be back in place.   
Niall had been spending a lot of time at Zayns house helping him with the kids but had now took a step back so he can get into the swing of life on his own.

Harry and Niall had the appointment with the bank to talk about mortgages and had been to visit the house, putting an offer down before they had even finished looking around. The second Niall stepped in the front door he could see him and Harry there with kids running around the place.   
Now they just had to tell everyone they would be moving, if their offer got accepted of course. They also had to decide what to do with their current house. Niall didn't want Harry to have to sell and Harry didn't want to rent it out as he felt wierd having strangers living there, but neither of them wanting it just going empty.

Niall was currently on his way to The pig and moon after Cassie had summoned him by text message. Not that he minded. Cass always had a basket of chips and a pint waiting for him when he came over during the day.

The car park was empty when he arrived which was odd. Cassie was one of the few people who opened before lunch time and the place was normally quite packed by this point.

When he tries to open the door it's locked so he bangs loudly calling out Cassie's name until she pulls the door open and yanks him in.

"Jesus you are so loud!"

"Why are you closed? Does this mean I don't get chips?" Cassie ignores him dragging him behind the bar and up the stairs.

When she gets him into the living room she runs into the bathroom coming back with a white plastic stick in her hand.

"Holy shit."

"Yeah." Niall takes it from her looking down at the positive sign.

"You're pregnant."

"I'm pregnant." Niall stares down at the test, throat tightening.

"You're going to have a baby. An actual baby. You are pregnant. A mum. You are a mum."

"Oh my god don't say that."

"Why not? This is good right." She covers her face with a groan before dropping her hands to her side.

"I think so. I mean me and lou have never talked about having kids. I don't think he wants them. I told him this morning I thought I might be pregnant because my period was late and he acted like I didn't say anything and just left."

"Maybe he didn't want to get his hopes up?"

"Or maybe he don't wants kids." Does someone who grew up with a heard of siblings not want kids? Niall can't imagine it. He loves kids as far as Niall knows.

"Come on love, this is good. You're having a baby why are we not jumping around. Maybe you shouldnt jump though. Can you jump?" Cassie laughs, cheeks flushing slightly as she holds the test back up to her face.

"I can't belive I have a baby in my belly. God I hope he is happy Niall." Niall pulls her into a hug, a hand pressed between them to her stomach. How crazy to think there is a little life between them right now.

"He will be. I am so happy for you love. Congratulations."

"Thank you." Cassie kisses his cheek, pushing his hair back. "You will be next yeah" Niall squeezes her side, hoping that the smile on his face still look genuine.

"I'm sure I will be. Still this is good news and it's definitely what we need right now."

Xxxxx

"What's up butt face." Louis drops his work bag on the floor plopping into the seat opposite Harry, picking up a menu.

Its not unusual for him and Louis to meet up for lunch considering their lunch breaks always happened at the same time but Louis had been extra insistent that Harry meet with him today so he eyed him suspisionly as he opened his own menu.

Louis had chosen a small cafe between their work places to meet and it was mostly empty of customers so it didn't take long for a young girl with a bouncy ponytail and a large grin to come bounding over to them.

"You guys ready to order? "

"Yep. I will have the house cheeseburger and Harold here will have the prawn salad because he is boring." Harry glares across andt Louis snapping his menu shut. The girl gave him a questioning look pen posed as she waited to write the order down.

"I will have that thank you. And a water." She gave him a sweet smile then walked off to place the order.

"It's not actually boring to want to be healthy Louis and considering how many fags you puff through a day you should really consider improving your diet a little to attempt to balance it all out."

"I don't smoke anymore." Harry laughs pushing his cutlery round the table.

"You were over last night and you had like six before you left. You where over for two hours. Six in two hours lou."

"Yeah well now I quite."

"Why the sudden change? Not that I'm not happy if you actually are being serious about this because I have always wanted you to quit."

"I think Cassie is pregnant." Harry gasp jumping up from his seat to rush around the table and jump onto a startled Louis.

"Oh my god this is the best news ever! Are you being serious. That was not a joke right?"

"No mate, no joke just a possible pregnant wife." Harry feels like he can't hold Louis tight enough. His whole body feels fuzzy with how happy he is for them. He had always thought they wouldn't have a baby because neither of them had ever mentioned it before and he had always been a little disappointed at the idea.

"Oh lou, this is so amazing. This is amazing right? Are you happy?" Harry leans back arms wrapped around Louis neck so he can see his face. He smiles up at Harry, eyes crinkling.

"Of course I'm happy. I was just worried you would be upset." Harry is completly shocked that the idea of him being upset by what feels like the first piece of good news in a lifetime is even in Louis head.

His best friend was going to be a dad. That was one of the most exciting things ever.

"Why on earth would I be upset? You're going to be fantastic and its a baby the more babies between us the better I say! And it might be a red head Lou. Oh my god we need to Google the chances of it having Cassies hair so I can prepare because I will not be ready for that amount of cuteness. I have this girl in my glass with this crazy bouncy red hair. Not saying she is my favorite but she is my favorite." Louis laughs, shaking his head at Harry as he reaches across the table for his phone butt still firmly places in Louis lap.

"I guess I just thought with you and Niall still waiting to hear from the adoption agency."

"That what? We would expect everyone to wait because its our turn next. No way man, pop em out. As many as you like. Gives us somthing to do while we wait don't it. Louis honestly I am so happy." Harry drops his phone to the table so he can grab both of Louis cheeks in his hand and plant a sloppy kiss to his lips.

"Umm, sorry." Harry pulls away, spinning in Louis lap to face their waitress.

"I'm going to be an uncle! It's going to have red hair!"

Xxxxxxx

Niall stops at Zayns before going home, a man in a blue suit leaving the house as Niall goes up the path.

Zayn leaves the door open for him, Liam already inside dressed in his work clothes tie loosened and shirt rumpled.

"Hey, who was that?" Niall follows them into the kitchen, Zayn flicking the kettle on.

"Estate agent. My solicitor wanted me to get the house valued as part of the divorce." Zayn had filed for divorce three days ago.

"You think you will sell it?" Niall sits down at the island next to Liam hooking their feet together.

"I don't have to because Matt has said he is fine with me staying here with the kids but I think I might. My half would be enough to buy me a smaller place maybe. It might be a bit harder taking on a mortgage by myself but I'm not sure I want to stay here with all the memories. Like a constant reminder of how happy we were." Niall bites down on his lip to stop himself blabbing about how his and Harry's house might be empty soon.

But it would be perfect.   
Harry would have no problem with Zayn and the kids living there. And it would helo Zayn our financially if he didn't have to take on a mortgage or rent from someone who would charge a massive amount for a family home.

He has to tell Liam first and then wait to see if they get the farm house.

"Might be a good idea I guess. I think I would want a fresh start too." Zayn places a mug down in front of Liam and Niall taking a seat in front of them.   
"Have you seen Matt much since you got things sorted with the kids?"

"Not really. He got the last of his stuff when he picked the kids up yesterday other then that it's just been the pick up and drop off. We thought it was best to get the kids used to not seeing us together much. Rae seems to be getting used to it already." Its all so bizzar really. Niall never thought he would be sat here talking to Zayn about his divorce. Matt and Zayn where the kind of couple you expected to be together forever. It was really sad to think they would have been it Matt just didn't mess up so badly.

"Anyway let's change the subject. All I do is think about Matt and the what ifs and the divorce and splitting things up and it's a lot. So Liam let's talk about you and Macy. How's that going?" Liam sips his drink the tip of his ear going rosey. Niall pinches it with a laugh.

"Stop it. It's going good, things are back to normal."

"Thats why you have been so chill lately then, finally getting some action." Liam blushes as Niall and Zayn laugh high fiving each other across the table.

"Don't be so crass. As a matter of fact yes we are back to having sex. And never again will I take for granted the kind of woman I get to take to bed."

"Good to hear. I for one will also never take for granted the kind of man I get to take to bed." Liam raises his mug tapping it against Nialls.

"Well lads, I will not take for granted the amazing person who invented wanking and dildos." Liam splutters at Zayns words face going impossible redder. Niall crackles loudly, head flung back. Then he let's himself picture that for a moment because he is only human.

"On that note." Zayn spins on his chair hopping down. "I'm going for a dump."

"Shut up you're to pretty to dump." Zayn beams running his hands over his hair.   
"Correct Niall. But I am going to shower. You still going to be here when I get out?" They both nod, Liam reaching over for the jar of biscuits making it quite clear he plans to settle here for a bit.

"I'm sure work won't notice if I'm a couple of hours late." He says shoving a biscuit into his mouth whole. Zayn gives him a grossed out look before leaving the room.

Niall watches Liam devour five more biscuits before taking his hand in his to get his attention back.

"Hi." Niall chuckles using his foot to slide Liam's chair closer.   
"Hey. Can I talk to you about something ."  
"Always. Its what I'm here for."

"How would you feel about me and Harry moving away?" Liam face hardens slightly, shoulder going tense. Niall stomach drops. If Liam is not happy with the idea then Harry could back out altogether.

"How far away are we talking?"

"We have found a house in Suffolk. We really, really like it." Liam's face softens, shoulders relaxing back.

"Well I would say that, Suffolk is not really that far and you and dad deserve to go and do whatever you want if it means you are both happier." Niall sighs in relief, nervously laughing. He thought it was all about to be ruined before they really got started.

"I don't want you to think I am taking him away or that we are going to be a family without you."

"I would never think that Ni. You and dad have been through so much together. Getting away and being in a place where you only have to focus on each other sounds perfect. It's not like I can't visit all the time. You two can come see me too whenever you want." Niall wonders how he managed to get such an understanding caring best friend.

He has falling in love with Liams dad at sixteen, broken his heart and left for four years leaving him miserable, been a pretty shit fiancé and ignored all Harry's warnings about Landon, now he is wanting to move away to hopefully bring their kids up outside the city and Liam is just being super chill about it all.

"I bloody love you." Liam takes another biscuit, crumbs flying everywhere as he chomps down on it.

"I love you too don't I. Otherwise I would have punched you so many times by now."

Xxxxxx

Niall practically dances into the house a few hours later Harry already home and cooking dinner in the kitchen. Niall kicks off his shoes and throws off his jumper before bounding into the kitchen.

"Cassie is pregnant!" They both shout it at the same time.

"How did you know?" They talk at the same time again. Niall flaps his hands about laughing.

"We need to stop or I will think we spend to much time together. Cassie told me, she is super stressed that Louis is not happy about it."

"So you saw her? She is defiantly pregnant?" Niall nods, looking over Harry's shoulder to see what looks like the start of Lasagna. Perfect husband Harry shall make.

"The test said so. I'm guessing you saw Louis today."

"Yes and he is happy about it trust me. Spent most of lunch gushing about all the things he wants to do. I am so excited for them." Niall leans against Harry's back, chin hooked on his shoulder.

"Me too. You think it will be us next?" Harry sighs, turning his head to kiss across Nialls forehead.

"I hope so. Although I say that if it comes out with Cassie's hair we take it and then run really fast." Niall laughs poking Harry's cheek with his nose.

"So I had a thought today."

"That can't be good." Niall rolls his eyes, reaching under Harry's arm to grab the seasoning he likes and sprinkles some into the pan avoiding Harry's smack.

"Zayn is thinking about selling his house for somthing smaller. Thought here might be pretty perfect for him and the kids. If we get the farm house that is." Harry hums, stirring at the meat.

"Also, I hope you don't mind but I told Liam about us maybe moving. He was cool with it. So thats pretty good right? Liam is happy for us and Zayn could move in here if he wanted. Just need to actually get the house don't we. Then it would be so perfect." Harry turns the stove off, pushing the pan off the hob.

"I guess it's lucky then that our offer got accepted today." Niall steps back hands flying up to cover his mouth.

Their offer got accepted.

Thier offer got accepted.

"The house is ours?" Harry nods stepping forward to sweep Niall off the floor spinning then around.

"The house is ours. " Niall presses their lips together, laughing into the kiss as Harry backs them into the wall.

"It ours." Niall nips down Harry's neck hand sliding under his top.

"Oh god its ours Harry." He tugs Harry's top off over his head quickly attaching his lips back to kiss over his chest before leaning back to remove his own.

Harry gently lowers them to the floor hands working on the button of Nialls jeans before slowly working them down his legs with his underwear, lips dragging down his legs with them. 

He pushes Niall legs up, kissing his bent knee before diving down to lick a strip over his hole.

"Harry." Niall tangles his fingers in his curls, gently rocking his hips as Harry takes his time, slowly licking him open waiting until he is dripping wet before sliding in a finger. Niall tilts his head back eyes fluttering closed as Harry works him open.

Niall feels tears building up behind his lids. It's all coming together. It's all starting to feel so right.

"Harry, want you inside me." Harry lifts his head up, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand as he removed his fingers to get out of his jeans.

He spits on his hand, coating his cock a few times before lining himself up with Niall pushing gently into him.

Niall grones at the drag, still a bit on the dry side but enjoying how much he can really feel Harry to care.

Harry stops once he is all the way in, gathering Niall up in his arms as he adjust to him.

"I love you." Niall leans up to kiss him, fingertips ghosting over his face as Harry starts to slowly rock into him.

Niall hooks his legs over Harry's waist, rolling his hips down to meet Harry thrusts crying out when he hits his spot dead on. Harry holds him still to keep the position, fucking into him a little faster as Niall starts to cry out into his shoulder teeth scrapping his skin.

"Love being inside you. Want this for the rest of my life. Going to marry you, make you my husband then fuck you like this forever baby." Harry kisses the words onto Nialls skin, sweet gathering under his lips as he drags them up Nialls neck.

Niall holds him tighter, sweet little sounds spilling out of him as Harry rolls his hips into his harder, pushing himself deeper.

" I'm going to come baby. Going to fill you up and make you all mine from the inside out. All of you belongs to me." Niall clenches around his cock and comes over his stomach. A few seconds later he feels Harry come, dick pulsing inside him as he spills into him.

They are both panting as they come down, leaving small kisses wherever ever they can reach.

"We got the house." Harry laughs, the sound filling the room with joy and covering them like a warm blanket.

"We did sweet boy. We got the house. Our home"


	38. chapter 38

"This suspicious gathering better be about my birthday." Bobby rolls his eyes from behind Louis, helping Lisa out of her coat.   
Niall finds Harry in the middle of everyone and widens his eyes. They forgot about it being Louis birthday soon. Harry just shrugs back.

"Hey dad." Niall pats his dad's shoulder as he passes then swoops down to kiss Lisa on the cheek.   
"How are you beautiful?"  
"Good my darling." Lisa squeezes his cheeks before moving on to greet the others.

Harry motions him over, a tray of snacks in his hand.   
"Are we going to wait until they are drunk to tell them?" Niall takes a crisp throwing it into his mouth.   
"Nah, tell them as soon as they are settled then let them get drunk while they accept the information." Harry nods, looking serious as he places the tray down. Niall watches him fondly pushing his fingers through his hair earning himself an annoyed glare and slap to the wrist.

He had no idea what Harry is expecting to happen when he tells them all their news but he highly doubts there is going to be much of an uproar.

"Right everyone." Harry claps his hands together. "Let's all sit down." Niall hangs back watching Harry with a grin as he tries to make sure everyone gets a seat.

"Liam I always sit there so can you move."

"How Lou? How do you always sit here. You don't live here so you can't possibly always sit here."

"Don't be a loser. Move it or I will sit on you."

"Sit on me then because I am not moving." Bobby groans taking a seat as far away from them as he can.

"What is it with you lot and never being able to just simple sit down. Always got to be some type of bickering. Louis the kid was there first so sit ya skinny butt somewhere else." Louis pouts moving past Liam to sit on the seat next to him.

Macy perches on Liam's lap and the look that washes over Liam's face as she settle back into him makes Niall feel so proud and happy.

Cassie sits next to Louis, Louis reaching out and helping her to sit down. Niall can tell he is going to be super annoying the further along she gets in this pregnancy.

Elliott has already settled in the corner of the room pushing around a few metal cars Harry and Niall keep for him, and will probably be doing this for the next few hours if left to it.

Rae is surveying the group trying to work out who's lap she is going to invade. Harry gives her a hopeful smile and taps his lap but she scurries of towards Bobby and Lisa and clambers onto Lisa's lap hand going straight into her hair. Harry's bottom lip juts out but then River is walking between him and the table so he holds his hands our for Nolan instead. Niall has never known someone to be so easily distracted when kids were about.

Niall was going to miss this so much. Getting everyone together whenever they wanted with a simple phone call or text message. There was strangely not a single cell in his body that was regretting the plan to move away. He would miss then to an almost painful level but he will enjoy being away form here and with Harry so much more.

Niall's eyes meet harry and he thinks he might be having the same kind of thoughts as they share a private look.

"Where is Malik? If we are going to be planning my surprise party he needs to be here."

"Because that is what we are doing Lou, we are planning your surprise party with you here." Harry gets up kissing at Nolan's head as he makes his way over to Niall.

"I think I saw him head into the kitchen, probably went for a fag. Why don't you go check on him."

"Yeah, OK. You hold these lost of for a bit. Don't let them pressure you into telling them until I am back." Harry nods, put Niall can tell he is worried. He can't keep his gob shut over the smallest of things.

"I will just let Louis keep planning his own birthday considering we forgot to."

Niall leaves him too it, grabbing his coat and shoving his feet into Harry's slippers before going out to the garden.

It's almost pitch black and he can just make out the outline of Zayn at the end of the garden, the glow of his cigarette as he takes a drag.

Zayn's head lifts up and he looks over his shoulder when he hears Niall's footsteps heading his way.

Niall bends done next to him, hand going into the grass to pull a few blades up. He feels Zayn's eyes on him before he offers out his cigarette.

"This is when I feel it the most." Niall takes a drag, waiting for Zayn to continue. Zayn takes his hat off then places it on Niall's head, adjusting it and moving his fringe away from his face for him.   
"When it's all of us together. That's when I miss him the most. When something funny happens and I look up to laugh with him. Or when Liam says some stupid shit and he is not here to roll his eyes with me. It's weird cause your all around me but they are the loneliest moments. I just never thought there would be an us without a him." Niall takes another drag handing it back to Zayn when he is done.   
"He keeps sending me these stupid fucking gifts too. Like shit that only me and him would find funny. And these stupid fucking love notes. Says that he won't stop trying to get me back. He hides stuff in the kids bags so I find them when I unpack. I was going to ask him to stop but I don't want to miss that too. I get so excited when they come home and I know there is going to be something else."

"It's OK to forgive him."

"I know. I just can't. The gifts, the notes, they are nice and they are thoughtful but it does not change what he did. When I see him I just see what he done and all the stuff it lead up to. Divorce is the right step. Just fucking sucks you know. Thought I was going to grown old and be really grumpy with him. Instead I'm bloody twenty one and I'm ending our marriage." Zayn stands up, walking away from Niall to throw his cigarette over the fence.

"Promise me that you and Harry will never end up like this. Marry him and just never let him go." Niall takes his hand tugging him closer until their chests are pressed together and he can hug him tightly.

"I promise. Going to keep him for life and he has no choice. Can you promise me something too?" Zayn turns his face into Niall's neck, breath ghosting over his skin.

"If being apart from Matt is going to make your miserable then please work on forgiving him. Don't hold back just because I can't. I want you to do anything you need to be happy." Niall feels the cold press of Zayn's lips to his neck. He holds them there for a seconds before stepping back and out of Niall's arms.

"Let's get in, I want to know what you have us all gathered here for."

Xxxxxx

"Right so, hello everyone." Louis snorts loudly kicking his feet out at Harry.

"Don't be a dork Haz and just tell us what's going on." Harry pouts moving out the way of Louis flapping feet. Niall takes his hand and gives it a squeeze.

"I'm not being a dork. Would anyone like another drink? Snacks? Are we warm enough?" Niall honestly can't believe this idiot.

"Me and Harry are moving."

"What do you mean you're moving? Like you're leaving this house?" Louis sounds outraged arms crossing over his chest in a huff.

"Yeah. Umm-" Harry clears his throat looking to Niall. "Me and Ni, we just wants a fresh start. So much has happened here and it doesn't feel right for us anymore. We love this house and it will always be special because it was where me and Rebecca brought up Liam and then it was where I fell in love with Niall but it's time to move on." Niall nods along as Harry talks. Bobby and Lisa are both smiling at them and Niall just knew that they would understand. Niall has never had to explain himself to them, even through crappy Skype calls with hardly any signal and thousands of miles between them, they both just always got what he was trying to do. What he needed to do.

"Move on to where? Like around here right? And what about this house?" Harry gets down on his knees cupping Louis hands in his own.

"We have found the perfect house Lou and I can already tell I'm going to be so happy there. Me and Niall. I really need this."

"Where is it?" Harry bring a hands up to his lips pressing a kiss on his knuckles.

"It's in this really sweet little place just outside Beccles, in Suffolk. It's about three hours away." Harry gets his phone out of his pocket. He had pictures of the house they had taken themselves ready on the screen. Louis takes it from him slowly swiping.

"Three hours is not as easy as it sounds you know. It's six hours in total. Not a day trip is it. Like we could only come up when we have the time from work. And it cost, for like petrol and shit."

"I know. But me and Ni would be coming here too. I know it's not as much as we are used to but we would never let it get too long would we?" Louis shrugs still looking through the pictures. He let's our a huff handing the phone to Cassie so she can look.

"It's annoyingly perfect for you by the looks of it, just sucks that it's so far." The others look at the photos, everyone staying quite as they take it in.

It's feels sad. Now it's out there and they all know Niall feels so sad to be leaving them all.

He knows they will be fine. They are mostly in really good places. They don't really need Niall and Harry to be here all the time. They have each other.   
There was just so much they where going to miss out on. It was going to weird being the only ones in the group missing it all.

Zayn tugs at his lip as he takes his turn looking. He was the one Niall was really worried about leaving.   
He was getting his life sorted but he still had a long way to go before he was really happy. He was going to have some really shit days and Niall might not be here for them. He just hoped a phone call would be enough.

"When are you going?" He asked before handing the phone to Bobby and Lisa.

"We don't know. Our offer only got accepted yesterday so I guess we have a few months left still. It won't be until next year. We still have Christmas together."

"Well that will be nice. We can make it real special this year. Spend the day together and really celebrate ending the year on a high yeah? I'm really happy for you both." River gets up arms held out as she gathers Harry and Niall up for a hug.

"Me too." Macy gets up dragging Liam with her to join the hug. "I think it's just what you need. And it really does look perfect for you both, I can't wait to come stay it looks so posh." Cassie joins them next, leaning over Liam's head to kiss them both.

When they pull apart Harry goes over to Louis pulling him up from the sofa.

"Please hug me and say your OK with this."

"I am OK with it Haz, it's just I cant believe we won't be living close to each other anymore. It's always been me and you." Niall goes to Zayn, sitting down next to him, swinging his legs over his lap.

"Tell me what you are thinking." Zayn tugs at a loose strand on Niall's jeans, his hand resting just above his knee.

"I don't want you to go but at the same time I'm really happy for you. Just really sucks you won't be here everyday. The groups getting smaller and that makes me feel really sad."

"I know love." Niall reaches his hand out, fingertips brushing over Zayn's cheek.

"I'm going to miss you so much you know that. But we will talk everyday and as soon as you need me I will be here. I will always be here for you no matter where I am." Zayn wiggles around until Nialls legs are under him and his head is resting on Niall's shoulder.

"I do know that." He searches for Niall's hand, holding it tightly and bringing it to his lips. "I hope its as perfect as it looks. I want you to have the best life Niall. I want you to have everything." Niall kisses the top of his head eyes moving over to Harry who is talking to Bobby. Their eyes meet and they share a sad smile with each other.

Xxxxxx

"Hey you." Niall stands up straight closing the fridge door with his foot as Macy comes into the kitchen.

"Hey Princess, you alright?"

"Yep." Niall picks up the bottle opener from the side taking the top of his bottle of beer.

"I'm really happy for you and Harry." Niall grins. Even though everyone was clearly sad about them leaving he was so relived that they were mostly happy.

"Thanks. We are really happy to. Feels great to have good stuff happening for once don't it?"

"God yeah. Thought all the drama would never end. Don't know how Liam is going to cope not having his best friend about anymore. Going to be like a right sad pup."

"Yeah well. Hes got you, he don't need much else." Macy looks up at him, doubt clear on her face.

"Do you think so? I'm enough right?" Niall puts his bottle down on the side.

"Love" Niall puts his hands on her shoulders, hating that she could ever think something like that still. "You are so much more then enough for him. He is obsessed. So in love it's crazy. He messed up and that must have been really painful, I know I wanted to kill him, but I don't think I have seen Liam regret anything that much before. You are it for him Macy, please don't ever doubt that. It would break my heart if you did." Macy nods, looking a little tearful as she looks down at the ground.

"You and Harry. You're the heart of us all, its going to be really hard when you go. So you have to make sure you have the best life possible or it won't be worth it and I will actually slap you because I'm going to cry and everything when you go." Niall hugs here, tears burning at his eyes as she squeezes back.

"Love you." She nods kissing his cheeks as she steps back.

"I'm just going to make a cuppa OK. Think Liam might need another hug from you. He is tipsy." Niall laughs, giving her another kiss before grabbing his drink and going back into the lounge where Liam latches onto him straight away.

"I can't believe how grown up this feels." Bobby comes and stands next to Niall slapping his hand down on his shoulder.   
"Moving away. God, you were like five a few second ago I swear. Wouldn't be more then ten steps away from me and your mother at that age and now you are moving away. She would have loved that you know. She loved the idea of you spreading your wings. You have done so much to make her proud Ni."

"Jeez Da, I'm doing really well not to cry today and you are gonna ruin it." Bobby just smiles at him taking a long sip of his own beer winking when Niall does the same.

"Harry, your phone is ringing in the kitchen love." Macy says coming back in with her steaming mug and red cheeks. Harry hops up looking eager.

"It might be the agent. I have been trying to get hold of him all day because I had a few questions." Niall rolls his eyes, Louis sending him a knowing look. Harry never has just a few questions and this was no exception. Niall was pretty so their agent regrets the day he answered the phone to Harry.

"Niall, Harry said your getting pigs? How do you look after pigs?" River asks from where she is sat pushing cars with Elliott.

"Love we are most certainly not getting pigs. I looked it up and they smell. He can have a dog."

"Aw, I think pigs are cute. What about horses. You have a paddock right? You can't be all posh with your paddock and not have a horse."

"Woman don't even think about mentioning the word horse to that man or I swear to god I will make your life hell." River pouts turning away from Niall, grumbling to Elliott. Cassie suddenly gasps sitting bolt up right hand slapping at Louis chest. 

"I know! A shelter. Oh my god you could have all the puppies in the world just running around and they would be so happy and can't you just picture Harry in there with them. It would be so cute I would die." Niall rolls his eyes, Bobby laughing quietly next to him.

"Yeah cute for you because you would not have to look after them. One dog, maybe two at a push. Thank god he is not in here to hear you say that. I would end up with horse and a dog shelter. Jesus, I would just come back here to be honest. Would not even marry him, just come back here and he wont notice cause of all the bloody puppies around him. Now let's stop thinking about all the apparent fun things we can do and never ever mention animals again other then normal household pets and a normal amount please." 

"Cows." Louis says while nodding his head. "Always thought cows were kinda cute."

"Chickens!" Rae shouts from Zayn's lap making him chuckle and ruffle her hair.

"You think uncle Ni should get some chickens babe?" Rae nods clapping her hands together. 

"And ducks Uncle Ni!"

 

"If you want a duck love then Daddy will get you one for your house." Zayn scowls over at Niall as Rae lets out an excited shriek. 

Harry comes back into the room and Niall looks up to start ranting to him about the plans everyone is making for their house but stops when he sees the look on Harry face. 

He is sanding in the doorway still, hand raised up by his head clutching the phone, face white. Niall almost drops his drink in his haste to put it down, heart slamming in his chest. He cannot deal with anymore bad news and this looks like bad news. 

"Harry?" Everyone else has fallen silent all looking at Harry who is just starring at Niall. 

"Love, what is is?" Niall looks at Harry's phone. The screen was still lit up but it was showing his homepage, the other person already hung up. Harry doesn't answer him. 

Louis slowly stands looking worried. 

"Mate, think your scaring Niall a bit, is everything alright?" Harry takes a step towards them but stops, swaying slightly. Niall can hear his heart pounding now, the rush of blood going trough his veins. 

"Is it your mum? Gem? Harry please tell me whats happened? The house is fine right? We still have the house? Harry?" Harry suddenly surges forward the phone dropping from his hands and clattering to the floor as he grabs Niall's face in his hands. 

"Someone picked us." 

"What." Niall's voice shakes, tears already filling his eyes and making his vision blurry. He is shaking all over and it can't really explain the feel the rushes over him but he knows he will never forget it. 

"Someone picked us. Someone-" Harry cuts of with a sob fingers pressing into Niall's face. "We are going to have a baby." 

"A baby. We are going to have a baby?" Harry shakes his head eyes closing as he lets out a breath, tears pouring out.

"Oh god Ni, twins. We have twins." Niall barely notices the commotion around him as everyone starts cheering. He can only see Harry. Harry grinning down at him as he cries. Harry who is holding him and pressing kisses all over his face. 

"Twins. That's two." Harry laughs, wiping at Niall's face.

"It is. Two babies Niall." 

"When? When is she...who is she?" Twins. After what feels like a lifetime of waiting they are going to have twins. Niall remembers at one of the meetings, saying that yes multiple births would be fine. He never thought it would actually be one when it happened. 

"I don't know anything about her yet, we get to go meet her tomorrow. Ni, she only has a month left. She is eight month pregnant already. Baby, its happening. You are going to be a dad." Niall blinks then looks around him at everyone. They are all crying and hugging. All looking so happy for them. 

He was going to be a dad. 

"I'm going to be a dad. Harry, i'm going to be a dad. I'm gonna- Da, i'm going to be a dad." Bobby comes over to him, face red and smile wide and pulls them both into a hug. 

"I'm going to be a Grandad!" 

"Holy shit I'm going to be a brother!" Harry holds his arm out pulling Liam into the hug. 

Niall clings on to them all, legs barely working to keep him up as he lets it wash over him. He wishes he could bottle this feeling up and relive it for the rest of his life. 

He thought back to what his dad said. 

It did seem like only seconds ago he was a kid and now here he was buying a dream house and becoming a dad. 

He finds Harry's face in the mess of people and kisses him, his heart feeling fuller then he ever thought possible.


	39. Chapter 39

Niall shuffles in his seat, the material of his jeans squeaking against the leather of the chair.

His finger taps against his knees, feet following the same rhythm on the floor.

On the small table in front of him are leaflets on adoption. He has already flicked through them about five times since being brought into this room.

He glances at Harry who is watching the door chewing on the side of his finger.

Niall has never felt so nervous in his life.

"What if they got the wrong file and she comes in and is like, oh sorry I didn't want the gay ones." Harry pales head snapping round to look at Niall.

"Why would you say that? I didn't even think if that. Oh god what if she doesn't want us."

"Happened on friends didn't it. With Monica and Chandler. They went in and they where the wrong couple."

"I'm going to be sick." Niall pats Harry on the shoulder feeling to stressed himself to offer much of a comfort.

The door clicks and both of them jump to their feet.

Patricia, the woman who greeted them when they arrived comes in first, folders in hand. She gives them both a cheery smile before stepping to the side.

The girl looks young. Younger then Niall has been expecting. She was beautiful, green eyes shining as she took them in, long blonde hair thrown over her shoulder the ends almost touching the top of her bump. 

Niall feels it the second his eyes land on her. He think Harry feels it too, his hand reaching for Niall and squeezing.

She looks as nervous as he feels, hands resting on the swell of her stomach. She is massive and Niall is hit with the realisation that she is carrying what is going to be his two babies. They are right there.

"This is Harry and Niall, boys this is Samantha." They both rush towards her helping her over to a chair to sit down. She laughs as she thanks them, slipping her bag of her shoulder and placing it by her feet.

"You are keen hey. I like to be called Sammy by the way."  
"I'm Harry." She nods then turns to Niall face splitting in a grin.  
"You must Niall then. It's nice to meet you both." Niall can't take his eyes of her bump, the way her hands barely cover it. He feel so protective already. Feels a pull he can't describe. This is it. That's the only way to put it. They are his.

"Can we get you anything? A water, are you comfortable enough?"

"I'm just fine thank you." Patricia stepped forward already looking delighted by everything.

"I'm going to step out for a moment, this meeting today is mostly about you getting to know Sammy a little. Ask any questions you want about family health history, Sammy will want to know about you boys too. Make sure she is happy with where these two will be going. Just give me a shout if you need me." Harry thanks her then she is gone, door closing softly behind her. 

Harry and Niall both stay at Sammy's feet, neither wanting to move too far away from her. She laughs leaning back in the chair. 

"You both seem a little awestruck. Would you like me to tell you about myself?" 

"Yes, sorry. This is just all so surreal. Please tell us everything." Niall nods along with Harry, throat to tight to talk. 

"Well, I'm seventeen, blood type o-positive. No history of diabetes or heart disease in my family. I am a only child, my mums dad has Alzheimer's and my uncle is a bit of a drunk but I'm not sure if that kind of thing pass-" 

"What do you enjoy?" Niall interrupts Sammy. She looks shocked for a second but the smile is quickly back on her face. 

"What do you mean?" 

"What do you like to do in your spare time? Favourite food? Do you like sports? Books? What makes you, you?" Niall doesn't care what possible health problems could be passed on. They can deal with them if they come up. He wants to know what personalities they could possibly have. What parts of Sammy could be passed on to them.   
He wants to get to know them as well as she probably feels she knows them. 

"Oh OK. I love music, all types of music. I play guitar and piano. All my family are quite musical. I really enjoy reading. Harry Potter is my favourite and I love the movies too. Could watch them everyday. I don't really play much sports. I trip over my own feet too much. I'm not sure about food, I like most things. My friend has me on this crazy healthy diet since I found out I was pregnant and it's not actually too bad but I think I would pick unhealthy stuff over healthy if I had the choice. So yeah, that's me."

When Niall looks at Harry he can tell he is holding back tears, throat bobbing.

"Is that OK?" She asks after they have both been silent for a while. Niall takes her hand in his. 

"Hunny, you don't understand how perfect that is." Harry nods frantically wiping at his face. 

"You are pretty much me and Ni mixed together." Sammy seems happy with that cheeks going rosy as she grins down at them. 

"I hope you don't mind me asking but why have you decided to to this?" 

"I'm only seventeen. I'm at collage and want to finish. I live in a bedsit with three other people. I can't imagine myself coping with one baby let alone two. My life is exactly what I want it to be right now. I would resent them. I don't think I would love them how I want them to be loved. When I saw your file I just got this feeling. This is the right thing for them. This is me being a good mum. I'm going to feel proud of myself this way. I made the best choice not just for myself but them too. I've been taking real good care of myself, I promise. Done all my appointments, got good sleep, I haven't gone out to any parties, I am eating well. My friends have been amazing about it, but once these are out then I want to go back to just being me."

Niall can't believe how perfect she is.

"Can I?" He motions to her belly. Sammy removes her hand and they both take that as a yes and quickly place their own over the bump. 

Niall leaves over to kiss the corner of Harry's mouth. 

"Do you know the sex?" 

"Nope, but if you want to know we can arrange another scan. I do know that they are non identical though, different sacks or something? I'm not sure I get confused sometimes when they explain all the medical stuff."

"That's OK hun, I think I would too." Harry spreads his fingers out, bumping them into Niall's. 

He still can't believe they will be their babies. They will get to raise them and love them and watch them grown into their own people with their own lives. 

"Hang on, if I just..." Sammy raises her hips sliding her hand behind her back. "This normal works, you are going to love it." Niall watches, confused as she starts to run her back. 

Harry gasps loudly snatching Niall's hand and placing it with his. Seconds later he feels movement. A small kick then both their hands raise a little. 

"The nurse at my last appointment told me they are stretching. Whenever I rub my back it seems to disturb them and they have a little stretch. So you just felt your babies." Niall lowers his head finally letting himself cry. 

"Thank you. For what you're doing for us. Thank you." 

"No, I should be thanking you two. Now tell me all about you. Do you have a big family?"

Xxxxxxxxxxx

"Niall it's happening. Its happening. Oh god its happening. Where is the bag? Where is the fecking bag? Its happening. Niall, I'm freaking out." 

"I noticed babe." Niall comes downs the stairs, hand held tightly in Sammy's as they slowly take the steps. She stops at the bottom face screwing up as she has another contraction. 

"Haz love, the bag is by the door. Where it's been all week. Go out to the car and get it started to warm it up. I have already put a message out on group chat. Liam is meeting us at the hospital. I love you" 

"I love you too." He bounds over to the stairs to give Niall a kiss then grabs the bag and rushes out to the car. 

Niall helps Sammy over to the sofa and sits her down before grabbing her shoes and helping her get in them. 

"I'm getting scared Ni. It's going to hurt so much." Niall pauses, raising himself up more so he is level with her. 

"What, no. Babe we got this OK. Me and Harry will be with you and if you want pain relief we will go for it. This is going to be amazing Sammy. We are about to meet these guys." Niall takes Sammy's hand and places it on her bump with his.   
"You're about to do something so amazing and magical. This is...god this is going to be the best experience ever. I will never be able to repay you for doing this for us." 

"Give them the best kind of love and consider me repaid. Now come on, I think I will feel more relaxed at the hospital and Harry's head is probably exploding out there." Niall finishes putting on her shoes then helps her out to the car, settling in the back with her to help her through the contractions on the way. 

"Let's go make you Daddies." Niall looks up and meets Harry's eyes in the mirror both breaking the promise to not cry until after the babies where born. 

X

"They are just doing an examination, Harry is with her. She is fully dilated so it's about to happen." Niall leaves against the wall phone held tightly to his ear as he speaks to Zayn. He was shaking all over. His life was about to change so much. 

"I'm so happy for you Ni. You are going to be so amazing at this. You and Harry. It's going to be the best thing you ever do. Now get back in there before you miss it, the rest of us will be there soon. I love you." Niall closes his eyes. He had been so emotional since they got to the hospital. It felt so real now and they where so close to holding their babies and taking them home. 

"Say it again." Zayn stays quite and Niall can hear the sound of the others in the background. It's late. Probably nearly morning and they are all getting ready to come to see them and Niall is so thankful he has the friends he has. 

"I love you Niall." Niall wipes at his face slowly starting to walk back toward the room. 

"See you soon Z." He hangs up, pocketing his phone then goes back into the room. 

The lights are dimmed, music playing . Some boy band Niall had never heard of but Sammy was obsessed with. Sammy was on the bed, blanket over her knees as two midwives examined her. Harry was stood by her head, pushing her damp hair back from her face and talking softly to her. Niall stood the other side of her, taking her hand just as the midwives step back from the bed. 

"OK, Sammy sweetie." They talk softly, moving around the room in a calm, slow practice way that makes Niall relax. "I want you to push with the next contraction, babies are ready to come and say hello." Niall swallows around the lump in his throat. Sammy wiggles up the bed a little more, bracing her feet on the bed letting out a shaky breath. She grips Niall's hand tighter so he leans down to pres his lips to her forehead.

"You got this hun." She looks up at him then nods. 

She looks so young as she bares down, teeth gritted around a groan. Harry's hand finds Niall's above her head. Niall looks up to him, tears already rolling down his face. Sammy relaxes against the bed head resting back against the pillow. 

"Good girl, you are doing so well. Extra big push with the next one, baby one is very keen it seems." Niall straightens up, lips parting as Sammy pushes again hand curling around Niall so tightly his fingers turn white. 

Sammy lets out a loud cry then flops down on the bed, body relaxing and then Niall and Harry are watching as one of the babies is lifted up and placed into a blanket.

"Baby girl."

"Oh my god." She lets out a small cry as one of the midwives start to pat her down with a towel. Niall's heart feels like it explodes in his chest with the sound. His baby girls first cry. Harry reaches across the bed pulling Niall towards him for a kiss that is soaked with tears before they both pull back to kiss Sammy's cheeks. 

"Right, ready for the next one."

"Not at all." Niall laughs helping Sammy to sit up again. She must be so exhausted. Niall could not even imagine having to give birth to one baby let alone two. 

The next one takes a bit longer and Niall can see the look the two midwives exchange after the fifth time Sammy tries to push. 

"Sammy darling, could you just push a little harder for me? Baby needs a bit more help." Niall looks at Harry in a panic but he still looks calm, just watching Sammy with a smile on his face. 

Sammy nods once, a look of determination flashing across her face. This girl has managed to blow Niall away non stop the past month with how brave and grown up she is and right now he is pretty sure he will worship her for the rest of his life. 

It feels like it takes forever for the next contraction to hit but when it does everything suddenly moves too fast for Niall to keep up. Sammy pushes, then one of the midwives lean over the bed and push down on her stomach while the other seems to be helping the baby come out. Niall watches is all with wide eyes the moment carving itself into his brain. 

"Baby girl again."

There is complete silence and Niall feels a shiver of terror go up his spine when they move her quickly over to the table.

"What's wrong?" 

"Baby just needs some help." Niall drops Sammy's hand rushing over to the table. They have her face down in their arms rubbing at her back.

"Is she breathing?" Harry comes up behind him, pressing up to his back. Niall leans back into him and for a second he thinks they might have lost her, because it feels like such a long time and she is not making a sound and she looks so pale. 

They flip her on to her front, Niall's heart missing a beat completely when he see's her face properly, eyes shut and somehow looking unbelievable beautiful even covered in all the gunk that Niall never learnt the name of. He should have learnt the name. He should have learnt everything so he knew what the hell was going on right now. 

"They are removing mucus." Harry whispers in his ear as they place something in her mouth. There is a horrible suction noise then a cry. Niall falls back into Harry more letting him support his weight. 

"I thought...Harry I thought."

"I know, baby but she is perfect." Is this what being a parent is like? Will Niall never not worry now for the rest of his life? How on earth does it manage to be the best feeling in the world still? 

"Here you go daddies. Time to meet your daughters." 

He has daughters. Niall has daughters. He is a dad.

Niall doesn't think he has ever cried as hard as he does when one of his babies are placed in his arms and he sees Harry with the other. 

Harry turns to him, standing as close as he can so both babies are nearly pressed together. 

"Congratulations Daddy." Niall laughs tipping his head back so Harry can kiss him. 

Xxxxxxxx

Niall steps out into the hallway Harry following closely behind. 

Everyone is there, piled up on the floor looking half asleep. 

Bobby cracks open an eye at the sound of the door closing and jumps up kicking his feet into Louis while gently tapping Lisa on the shoulder. 

Liam reaches them first hand covering his mouth as he looks down at the bundles in their arms. 

"Liam, meet baby sister number one. This is Darcy Anne Styles." Liam pulls the blanket away from her face a little, sniffling back tears as he strokes a finger over her face. 

"She is perfect. Oh god I love her so much already." Harry steps forward. 

"And meet baby sister number two. Rebecca Maura Styles." Liam eyes widen and this time he reaches out to take her from Harry with a small sob.

"You called her Rebecca." 

"It seemed right." Liam cradles her to his chest kissing her wrinkled forehead. Niall goes over to his Dad, passing Darcy to him.

"They are so perfect dad. So perfect I might actually die." Bobby laughs wrapping an arm around Niall's waist, Darcy safely cradled in his chest. 

"I know how you feel." 

"How's Sammy?" River asks, peaking around Liam for a look. 

"She is really good. She had a cuddle but I don't think she wants to see them again. She is happy though. We are going back in a bit to talk to her. Seems odd that we might not see her again after this. After what she has just given us." River gives them a sad look. Over the past month Niall thinks she has felt a little sad for Sammy, knowing that if this happened just a few years later then it would have been so perfect for her. But Niall thinks it was meant to be, Sammy was meant to be their person to give them this gift. 

"OK, stop hogging the babies and give one to uncle Lou please." Liam huffs as Louis makes grabby hands at Rebecca but passes her over anyway keeping his hand on her head as Louis starts cooing at her. 

Bobby hands Darcy over to Cassie. Niall steps back into Harry's arms as they watch them all fall in love with their girls. 

X

"I don't understand how they can be so perfect." Niall and Harry are laying on the hospital bed, Darcy and Rebecca between them asleep. 

"Like actual perfection Harry, look at them. All ours. We get to keep these ones, we don't have to pass them back. They are all for us." Harry runs his fingers over Niall's hair watching the way he looks down at them. He did not think he could love Niall more, never thought his heart could have more love in it but in the past few hours it has managed to grow to fit two babies in and even more love for Niall. He got to watch the man he loves become a dad for the first time. 

"I love you so much Niall. I can't believe I got so lucky with you." He runs his thumbs across Niall's lip, his eyes flicking up to Harry's. "You bring me so much more happiness then I thought possible to feel. I can't wait for the rest of my life with it. It's like I never want it to end but at the same time I just want it all to happen so I can live it you know? You make me feel so much it's crazy." Niall blinks, a few tears rolling down his cheek as he grins back at Harry. 

"I love you too. I can't wait to Marry you and be the best husband and the best dad to our kids. It's going to be a great life. God Harry, we got a really good life didn't we? I know we have had some bad things. Me losing mum and you losing Rebecca and then the stuff with...you know, but we have a really good life. I am so lucky you took a chance with me. Back when I was a stupid kid and then when I came home again. Thank you for giving me this." They look down again, Rebecca wiggling a little, then Darcy. Niall wondered if they would always be so linked. 

He can't wait to watch these two grow and see what they are like. 

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Niall stands in the doorway of the spare bedroom, chewing on his lip as his eyes roam over the room. He can hear all the commotion outside as the removal men loads up the lorry with the last of their things ready to make the drive down to the new house. 

The past two months have been crazy. Their first Christmas with the babies and the last in this house. 

Niall steps away from the room, closing the door behind him. For a second he thinks he can hear the sound of Liam's laughter floating around the room. That's the saddest part about leaving. The way that memories seem to float around the rooms, bouncing off the walls and filling them all with warmth. It was time for new memories and a new chapter to their lives. 

Zayn's boxes where scattered around the hallway, ready for him to unpack once Harry and Niall where gone. Niall steps over them and makes his way downstairs. He takes one last look around the living room then steps outside. 

Harry is bent over in the car getting the babies strapped in and the others are all lined up waiting to say goodbye. 

Niall goes straight to Zayn pulling him away from everyone. He pulls him close, hand curling around the back of his neck as he pushes their foreheads together. 

"I'm going to really fucking miss you." His voice breaks and he has to take a few deep breaths to stop himself from crying. 

"I am going to miss you too." 

"You call me whenever you need me, anytime. Even when you don't need me just call me yeah? Want to hear you voice everyday and I want to know what you have been doing and what the kids are up to."

"I will."

"I am so proud of you Z. Of the person you have become. The friend and the father that you are. You have made my life so much better just by being in it. I love you. I love you." Zayn leans back, hand slowly dragging up Niall's back. He brushes their noses together, letting out a breath that brushes over Niall's lips. 

"I love you too. I love you for believing in me and supporting me. I love you for always wanting the best for me. You make me a better person. I will always love you Ni. I'm so happy and I can't wait to come see you in your new life. Enjoy every second of it for me." Niall tugs at his hair, kissing his nose and then steps back and walks away.  

"Right, group hug." He holds his arms out and they all rush forward to try and hug him at once. 

"For Christ sake Liam, that's my foot."

"Oh fuck of Lou i am not even anywhere near you!" Niall laughs pressing kisses to all their face. 

"Never change you lot! You better all still be a bunch of dicks when I see you next."

"I'm taking that as a compliment considering how much you like dick." Niall winks at River.

"I most certainly do babe." Harry finally gets out the car, a proud smile on his face as he motions to the two successfully strapped in and asleep babies. 

"I nailed it."

"Harry you just took like half an hour, that's not nailing it really is it?" Harry scowls at Louis but then tugs him in for a hug kissing over the top of his head. Niall goes over to Liam.

"You still coming next week to see the house right?"

"Yep, should be able to stay for a couple of nights too. So you don't have to worry about missing me too much just yet." Niall nods, then his chin wobbles and fuck it really. He can cry. 

"Oh mate, come here." Niall buries himself into Liam's chest. 

This was so hard. The idea of getting in the car and driving away from them all was horrible. He knew he was still going to be seeing them but he had just gotten so used to them all being just a walk away. He saw them almost everyday and now that would be reduced to every few months. It was going to be a hard change.

"I am so glad you picked my arse up off the floor at school. My life would be nothing compared to this if you had not of done that."

"You mean you wouldn't have met my dad, had sex with him behind my back and then done the babies and stuff." Niall laughs swatting at his shoulder.

"No I meant I would not have met you and had you in my life and that would have really sucked because you are like the bestest best friend ever. You are always there for me and I am just really thankful to have you in my life." 

The lorry starts up behind Niall, Harry shouting something up to the driver before he pulls away. Niall watches it go up the road over Liam's shoulder. This is is. 

"Right. Love you guys." Niall gives them all a kiss making sure they all know how much he loves them before he goes over to the car, Harry following him. He stops before he gets in and looks over to Zayn. 

"Tell Elliott and Rae how much I love them." Zayn smiles giving him a thumbs up. 

Niall gets in the car, Harry already in the drives seat turning the engine on. 

"We have everything right?"

"Yep, Zayn will just post anything if we have forgotten anyway. We got the babies so that's all that matters." Harry nods putting the car into gear. 

"Here we go then baby." Niall smiles, looking out the back window at everyone huddled up together. 

"Here we go." 

Niall keeps looking out the window as they all get smaller and smaller, then Harry turns the corner and they are gone. 

He turns back to the front, Harry's hand settling in his lap. 

Ending a chapter is hard but Niall knows better then most that starting a new chapter can be one of the best feelings in the world. 


	40. Chapter 40

4 months later

Niall watches as the bowl of pureed apple and banana splatters onto the floor. He let's out a long breath eyes narrowing at the two smiley faces in front of him.

"OK. Here's the deal. I will give each of you one, and I mean it this time, one biscuit each. You're gonna eat the biscuit while I clean up this mess then we are gonna clean you two up and then when we go outside we are going to tell Dada that you ate the apple and banana mush OK. Cause that's what he said you have to eat." Niall lays a biscuit on each of their trays both reaching out with their chubby little hands to pick them up and start sucking on them.

"There we go. They are sugar free anyway and what he don't know won't hurt him." Niall bends down spooning what he can back into the bowl before dumping it in the sink and grabbing a cloth for the rest, pretending not to notice the crumbs being sprinkled in his hair.

He can't remember the last time he was not covered in food and before food it was sick and milk. The occasional wee and poo.

Once he is done he sits back down at the table to watch Darcy and Rebecca finish their biscuits, one ear expertly listening out for Harry's footsteps in case he decides to come in and see them.

Harry has always been the one to get the babies to eat healthy. Niall does not seem to have the same luck. Harry of course is completely unaware of this fact so far and Niall plans to keep it that way.

To be honest he misses the days when it was just as simple as sitting down with a warm bottle and cuddling them while they fed. He hated anything that meant they were growing and he refused to believe his girls where 7 months old already.

The bang of the screen door opening snaps Niall out of his thoughts and he jumps into action taking the last of the biscuits and starts frantically wiping away crumbs.

"You two don't say a word." Rebecca let's out a squeal of a laugh legs kicking out.

"You teaching them girls bad habits already." Niall spins around at the voice, face breaking into a grin.

"Dad! You're early."

"Couldn't wait to see my ladies could I." Niall hugs his dad, kissing his cheek before letting him go so he can go over to the girls and get them out their highchairs for a hug.

"Oh god, you two got so much bigger. Give Grandad a hug please." Niall wouldn't really call what Bobby gets a hug. More of a face pull and sticky hands in his mouth but it looked sweet enough.

"Where's Lisa?"

"She got caught up with Harry. He is showing her something to do with chairs. I managed to make a speedy escape. He sure is excited." Niall heart bubbles, actually bubbles at the thought of Harry talking Lisa through everything.

"Well can't say I blame him." Bobby looks over to Niall, face going soft.

"Guess I can't either. He is marrying the best damn man in the world tomorrow after all."

"Yeah, well so am I."

Xxxxxxxxx

"What's up dickhead!" Niall tuts swatting at Liam's shoulder for using a naughty word out of habit then tackles him sending them both sprawling onto the sofa. 

"Get off me. I'm here for my sisters not you." 

"Whatever. You love me and miss me."Liam relaxes, arms sliding around Niall's waist. 

"Yeah, I really do. So good to be here."

"Good to have ya. Girls are asleep, where is Macy? " 

"Harry got her."

"He is getting them all Liam. There will be no ladies left." There is a a booming laugh then the sound of everyone's voices overlapping each other then Harry is coming into the lounge with Bobby, Lisa and Macy trailing behind him. 

Macy let's out a squeal when she spots Niall and jumps over the back of the sofa, knee hitting Liam in the chin as she grabs at Niall. 

"You would think you kids haven't seen each other for years." Lisa sounds fond as she speaks, ruffling their hair as she passes, sitting down on the rocking chair. 

"Didn't you start in your new school last week Harry? How's it going?"

"Oh Lisa." Harry sits down, hands on his cheeks as he slowly shakes his head. "I have the best kids. You just don't understand the amount of cuteness in my life now. It does not stop. They are going to kill me." Niall rolls his eyes before trying to shove his foot into Liam's face.   
Bobby leans over and slaps at Niall ankles.   
"You ain't thirteen anymore boy." Niall pouts head flopping back as Liam sticks his tongue out and nips his leg. 

Xxxxxxxxxx

Niall pulls the curtain back leaning forward to look out the window. 

Dishes clatter in the background, the kids blocks falling over as they make towers with Macy and the TV is on low Lisa and Bobby both half asleep as they watch some game show. 

It's starting to get dark out but Niall can still see the chairs set out, all facing a beautiful archway of flowers that make the alter where both Harry and Niall will stand together tomorrow to get married. 

He can't believe it's actually here. That after the madness of the past four months they have actually pulled together a wedding. Their wedding.   
He can't wait to be Harry's husband. 

The only thing dampening his spirits is that Zayn had yet to arrive.  
He knew Louis and Cassie would be getting here before the twins bedtime with River and Nolan but they had not heard from Zayn at all. 

Which was, to be honest, not unusual. 

Zayn was the only one he had not seen since they left. The others all made the journey down at least once already. He only managed to get him on the phone a couple of times a week if he was lucky and each time he could tell that Zayn was being fake. Nothing but forced cheeriness as he made excuses and hung up after only minutes. 

He can't help but have it in the back of his head that he was not coming. 

Him and Harry had not been able to visit London, not with Harry looking for work and planning the wedding. Which Zayn had said he understood, was fine with it. The others had all been the same which was why they made a point of driving up to see them and lend a hand with planning. 

Niall can't understand why Zayn had not done the same, why he was not talking to Niall everyday like he promised. 

He sees headlights down the track and for a second let's himself get excited. It could be him. Everyone was supposed to be coming tonight. 

It Louis' car. His shoulders slump and his stomach drops. 

A hand smooths over his back, Harry pressing his lip to the back of his neck. 

"He will come." Niall watches as Louis gets out the car running round to the passenger side to help Cassie out stopping to kiss her belly before moving to help River get Nolan out. 

"Yeah, of course he will." Niall clears his throat then goes to the front door desperate to give Nolan a big kiss before he is whizzed off to bed. 

Xxxxxxxx

Niall slips out the house as Harry is showing everyone to their rooms, the twins are moved in with them for now so everyone had a room each. 

He walks over to the paddock, hands shoved in his pocket as he slowly makes his way up the makeshift aisle. 

It was ten at night. Zayn was not here. 

He doesn't want to get married without Zayn to experience it with him. Without him being right in the middle of it all. 

He settles down on one of the chairs at the front, careful to not let his boots touch the white fabric Harry had been pulling over them all today.  
He was sure Harry would see that as grounds for divorce. 

It was a nice night, peaceful and clear. A promise of another nice day tomorrow. Everything was going right. Niall should be happy but Zayn absence was like a weight on his heart. He had no idea what he done to make him become so distant.   
Did he resent Niall for leaving when he was still a mess over Matt?   
Did he think Niall was selfish for thinking of him and Harry over the rest of them? 

"That's a serious thinking face right there." Niall smiles as Harry takes a seat next to him.   
"Do you like it?" Niall takes a deep breath looking around.   
"It looks amazing Harry. Everything you have done is amazing." Harry tucks his hand into Niall's, turning his head to look at him.   
"I'm sorry you're feeling sad." Niall just shrugs.   
"I'm sure it will be fine in the morning. Going to be too excited to be sad. Going to be pretty fucking happy I say." Harry flushes, bringing Niall's hand up to his mouth.   
"It's OK miss him as much as you do. You and Zayn, you have something . Not sure what it is or if I should even like it but it's there. I understand that you need to be sad about it love. He might still come in the morning."  
"If he was going to come he would have let me know why he is late. Or maybe he wouldn't, I don't know with him anymore. Are we even still friends? I don't think he is coming." Harry sighs sadly looking at the alter in front of them. 

"I finished my vows."  
"Yeah? You happy with them." Harry shrugs standing to his feet letting Niall's hand drop.   
"I think so but I think it's wildly unfair that I'm up against a writer."   
"Wildly unfair?" Harry looks down at him with a glint in his eyes, skin pale in the moonlight.   
"The wildest. You know our worry should be with Louis. As soon as he said yes to marrying us I got the feeling he was already planning something." Niall laughs getting up so he can tuck himself into Harry.   
"Like what? You think he will have us perform some weird ritual?" Harry presses his face into the side of Niall's neck and blows a raspberry making him curl up and let out a high pitched giggle. 

"Well I'm happy to perform whatever rituals if the end result is you saying I do." Niall hums pinching Harry sides. 

"I think Cassie being pregnant has softened him up. We are getting some romantic stuff I think." Harry looks over Niall's shoulder a smirk slowly creeping onto his face. 

"Looks like the last light just went out in the house. Everyone is asleep. How about I lay you down right here, right where we will become husbands and make love to you?" 

"Make love to me?" 

"Yes Niall. The act of romantically putting my penis into your arse and slowly and romantically make love to you."

"Slowly and romantically outside, on the dirt, dry. Babe no, but thanks." 

"Oh come on." Harry playfully starts trying to kick Niall's feet out from under him. "Make love to me baby. Sweet, sweet love." Niall laughs and yells as Harry tries push him to the floor, arms clinging onto Harry's neck as he manages to shove him onto his back.   
"I mean it is your duty after all" Niall gasps around a giggle slapping Harry across the top of his head.   
"My duty my arse." Harry nods, dimples popping as he grins.   
"Exactly. Your arse if your duty. You learn quick. Now get naked you sexy man." Harry shoves Niall's top up and is braced to bite down on his stomach when the sound of tires on the gravel make them both look up towards the house. 

Niall shoves Harry off him and scrambles to his feet as a car pulls up and parks. He can't tell what the car is with all the lights out so moves towards the gate eyes squinting. 

He stops as the door opens and the interior light comes on. 

"Zayn." Zayn closes the door with his hip raising his hand in an wave. 

Niall starts moving again, slowly making his way across the driveway to him. He can see the kids asleep in the back seats and could cry at seeing their faces after what feels like way to long. 

Zayn's hair is longer, the stubble he is used to now almost a full beard. He is smaller. He looks smaller and older over such a short time. 

What had Niall missed?

"I didn't think you were coming." His voice breaks but he does nothing to cover it up. He was sad and he wants Zayn to know that. "You fucking arsehole, I didn't think you were bloody coming." Zayn nods, looking down at his hands, car key dangling. 

"I'm sorry." He looks up eyes meeting Niall's for the first time. "It's really good to see you." Niall closes the space between them, hand wrapping in Zayn's jumper pressing their heads together.   
"Where the fuck have you been?" Zayn rest his hands on Niall's waist, thumbs slipping under his top and pressing into his skin.   
"I don't know. Dealing with shit. Missing you. I've been crap, I'm sorry."

"Your here now, that's all I wanted." Zayn sniffs bumping their noses together before tucking Niall's head to his shoulder.   
"I have missed you so much." 

Xxxxxxxx

Niall helps Zayn get the kids settled into bed then tugs him into his and Harry room so he can see the sleeping twins. 

"Oh man. Fuck Niall." Niall beams, practically bouncing around him.   
"I know. They got cuter. Did not think it was possible but look."Niall waves his hands over them.   
"They managed." Zayn rolls his eyes, bending down to tuck the blanket over them more.   
"I used to watch Elliott for hours in the night. Never cared about losing sleep, just wanted to see everything he done while he dreamed." 

"When did you stop?" Zayn laughs quietly, fingertips brushing over Darcy's foot.   
"I didn't to be honest. Still do it all the time. To Rae too, even use to do it to Matt sometimes." Niall sits down on the bed, curling his feet up beside him.   
"I just- I just could never believe i got so lucky, to have all that when I had nothing, thought I would always have nothing. Blows your mind doesn't it. How much they mean to you. How much you would do to protect them. The sacrifices you would make to keep them safe." 

"Zayn, Mat-" 

"I should go to bed." Zayn gets up, hand brushing down his leg the smile he give Niall forced.   
"You need all the beauty sleep you can get or you will make for an ugly bride." He bends down to kiss Niall's cheek then pauses. Niall holds his breath, hand gripping on the the end of the bed as Zayn noses at his cheek.   
"I really have missed you." Niall swallows, eyes closing as Zayn kisses his cheek again then straightens up leaving the room. 

Harry slips in a few minutes later. Niall is still sat up, knees drawn to his chin as he watched the twins.   
There was defiantly something different about Zayn.  
It felt strained. It's never felt like that before.   
Zayn was being fake around him and he hated it. 

Once Harry is settled in bed he grabs Niall's shoulders and yanks him back down under the covers. 

"How was he?" 

"Don't know." Niall rolls into Harry more, hand running over his chest tracing the ink there. "Sad i think, but he doesn't want me to know that. He is hiding from me. Maybe he doesn't trust me anymore, not like before. Think I have lost him Haz." Harry just gives him a sad smile kissing him softly before settling down on his pillow to get some sleep. Niall stays awake, watching Harry drift away as he keeps drawing patterns over his skin. He has no idea how much time passes and does not even want to look at a clock. He should be asleep, resting up for tomorrow. 

In the end he kicks away the blanket and wiggles out of Harry's arms. He gives the twins a check over then leaves the room heading downstairs and into the kitchen putting the kettle on. He waits for it to boil, finger drumming against the worktop as he thinks abut tomorrow. It was going to be so good to have all his family and friends under the same roof for the day, and it felt amazing to have the gang back together already. 

They had not been a full group since they moved, he had missed it. 

He shuffles though to the lounge his toes digging into the carpet as he heads towards the sofa. 

"Hey."

"Oh Jesus fuck." Niall jumps tea sloshing over his hand.   
"Ah shit. What the hell Zayn. You actually just nearly killed me, sitting in the dark like some killer. Fuck man." Niall switches the lamp on heart still slamming in his chest as he drys his hand on his trousers.   
"My heart. It's going to explode I swear."

"You're so fucking dramatic." Zayn moves up then sofa holding up the blanket he had draped over his legs. 

Niall sits down, arranging the blanket over his lap before taking a long sip of his tea. 

"Why you not asleep? Nervous for tomorrow?" 

"No, just had a lot on my mind so thought I would try and settle it then try again. Why are you up?" Zayn shrugs looking down at his lap. 

"Just felt unsettled, I find it hard to sleep in unfamiliar places." Niall sips the rest of his tea in silence trying to ignore the jab in his gut that his home is not a familiar place to Zayn and focuses on enjoying having Zayn next to him even if there was a level of tension there that he was not used to between them. 

"You know." Niall leans forward to place his mug on the coffee table. "After Ma died I started spending a load more time at Liam's and it was always late at night on his sofa that me and Harry used to talk. Like this, all snuggled under a blanket. How I started crushing on him I guess, learning stuff about him. I loved those moments." 

"Really? That sounds sweet. I always feel braver in the night you know, like darkness is a kind of security blanket. When I first starting telling Matt about Mason and the stuff my parents used to do it was always at night." Niall watches Zayn's face, the way his mouth turns down slightly and his eyes sadden.

"Is there anything you want to talk about now?" Zayn looks thoughtful, and Niall hopes this is a chance for them to clear the air a little. For Niall to have some kind of reason for why Zayn has gone so cold towards him. 

"Not really." Niall deflates, falling back against the sofa.   
"Right, OK." They fall into silence again. It's awkward and Niall just really hates it. He never thought moving away would have this effect on his and Zayn. He thought it would be non stop phone calls and declaring they miss each other the most. He didn't think it would be four months of mostly silence and then a awkward reunion that throws Niall of balance completely.

He glances over at Zayn, tugging at his bottom lip nervously. He look so done in, like he could do with going to bed and not emerging for a week. The shine in his eyes has gone, the skin just below dark and puffy. Niall wants to wrap him up and hide him away from the world. Have it just be them two for a while. How it used to be. Wrapped around each other and talking shit until everything felt normal again. 

The weight loss worries him. It's not loads but it's there. Has he stopped eating as much, or is it just stress? Is he doing OK with money, can he afford all the food he needs for himself and the kids? This is stuff he should know. Stuff that Zayn would probably keep from him now.

He has a few new tattoos, Niall notices. Random ones scattered around his inner right arm. How he even managed to find the space and make it still not look overcrowded is beyond Niall. 

He reaches out to touch them but Zayn moves his arm away, slowly like it had nothing to do with Niall about to touch his skin. 

"You got some new tattoos." Zayn shuffles away, letting out a breath as he looks down at his own arm, fist clenching and making the muscles jump a little. 

"Do they mean anything?" 

"No, just saw them and liked them." He eventually holds his arm out for Niall. He hesitates, eyes on Zayn's face before he runs his fingers over them.  
Its so unlike him to be so hesitant about touching him. 

"I like them. They are cool, going to look amazing when you are really old." Zayn takes his arm back, rolling his eyes.  
"Shut up." Niall nudges him with his shoulder and Zayn kicks him lightly on the ankle. It make Niall smile quite a bit.

"A couple of months ago I was laying in bed with Rae, we were just talking about random kid stuff and it was really, really fucking nice to just be with her and talk like she was this little adult." Zayn rubs at his face then flops his head back against the sofa.   
"She likes to pretend she is colouring in my tattoos with her finger and she was doing that while she was talking and then she just suddenly stops and looks at my arm more." Zayn swallows and then closes the small gap between him and Niall with a quick wiggle.   
"She saw my scars, like my track marks and she asked what they where. I never wanted her to see them, I never want her or Elliott to know about that part of my life. So I got up and Liam took her for a bit and then I went and got these. You can still feel a few of the scars but at least you can't really see them now. I should have covered them up sooner but Matt used to talk this shit about it being a reminder for me, on what I once was and how far I have come. But I don't have to listen to his therapist shit anymore so whatever." Niall takes Zayn's arm back and gently brushes his finger over where he knows the scars are. 

He had always avoided looking at them, hates the images it brings to his mind. Zayn alone, sad and angry injecting that poison into himself just to feel something other then the hurt.   
The story Zayn's mum told him, of finding Zayn in his room covered in his own vomit with a needle still in his arm, its one that will haunt him for the rest of his life the same way it haunts her. 

"You are so much more then that, then these." Niall brushes his fingers over the scars, throat tightening as he felt the slight raise on the skin there.  
"Yes, you were an addict but that is not all you were. I so badly wish I could change the way you see your past self. Who you are now has always been apart of you, it was just hidden a little. Under all that anger and hurt and confusion. You never had someone who made you feel OK to be yourself or made you realise just how good you really were. I saw it sometimes, when we hung out. Little peaks of you, the you I have now, he was sometimes there. You could be gentle and kind, like when I was upset or stressed you would say the right thing or give me a hug." Zayn looks at Niall, leaning into his touch a little as he speaks.

"I tried to get you hooked on drugs Ni, I told you it would make you feel better about your mum for Christ sake."

"Yeah, that was a dick move I will give you that. You also made sure I was safe most the time, you told me how to take care of myself. Never let me drink alcohol after taking something, followed me around, stayed the night with me, didn't let me take too much. I don't think you wanted to hurt me. You just didn't want to be alone." Zayn leans in, eyebrows draw together as he brushes his nose with Niall's.

"Is that how you saw it at the time?" Niall nods, hand gripping around Zayn's bicep.

"Yeah, I think so. I guess I liked your company. Liked getting little details about you. Like how you don't eat meat because the idea of animals getting hurt makes you cry, but you're fine to punch some random kid in the face if they so much as glance at you." Zayn's lips curl up into a smile.

"Or how you kinda hated your sister because she was the golden child but when she broke her dance shoes you stayed up all night to help her fix them so she didn't get in trouble." Zayn rolled his eyes.

"She was small, I didn't want them to start seeing her like they saw me." Niall moves his hand to Zayn shoulder, pushing their foreheads together.

"You could have done a lot worse to me but you didn't."

"I was in love with you, even then." Niall closes his eyes, letting out a breath.

"Funny way of showing it." Zayn laughs nudging Niall's shoulder.

"I'm going to be better, I promise. This divorce, its made me tired and sad and I've been pushing everyone away. I love him so much and I am really scared I won't ever love like that again. I don't want to be alone but I don't know if I ever want to be with another person."

"You could forgive him."

"Can you?"

"This is not about me Z, this needs to be about what you want and what you need to be happy. Whatever that is, you will have my full support. I love you too you know, I want you to be happy." Zayn sighs, his breath brushing over Niall's face, their noses nudging together again. 

"So these late night chats with Harry, is that how you had your first kiss with him?" Niall just blinks back at Zayn for a second, the subject change throwing him slightly. 

"No, actually we had our first kiss in his bathroom after what felt like years of being the most sexually frustrated teenager in the world. Got pretty steamy." Zayn chuckles, hand squeezing Niall's knee gently. 

"You two are the real deal. Proper soul mates and all that shit. I'm so glad you're getting married, sorry for not being a present as I could have been while you have been planning this." Niall shrugs, like it's no big deal and he hasn't been upset over it for four months. 

"You are here now, that's all I care about. Can't believe how much I missed you. I always knew how special you are to me, but I didn't know how much I really want you around me until I left. Don't leave me for so long again or I will punch you in the dick." Zayn laughs and for a moment his face lights up and the shine is back in his eyes. Niall takes in the crinkles by his eyes, the slight red tint to his cheeks, his soft fringe falling over his eye just a little.

"I love you." Zayn's laughter dies down he hand pushing into Niall's hair.   
"I love you. Wish I only loved you. You would never have hurt me the way he did. You would have taking such good care of my heart." Niall doesn't really know what to say to that so he doesn't say anything, he just rest his head on Zayn's shoulder and hugs him tightly. 

It's true, he never would have hurt Zayn if he had him like Matt did. He would have know how bloody lucky he was and worshipped him the way he deserves.   
But really, Matt did worship him. He just let his head get messed up. The whole thing really fucking sucked. 

"Come on, bed. Rae is going to lose her shit when she wakes up and realises she is here. We need to be well rested for that." Niall let's Zayn push him up of the sofa, waiting as he folds the blanket back up and hangs it over the back of the sofa. He holds his handout and Zayn takes it, folding their fingers together as they walk up the stairs, stopping outside Zayn's room. Niall leans around him to have a peak at the kids asleep, chest warming when he spots their little heads peaking out from the blankets.

"Can't wait to give them a cuddle." Zayn let's go of his hand, stepping back towards the door. 

"Night." Niall nods, stepping back. 

"Goodnight." They look at each other for another moment, then Zayn turns and closes the door behind him. 

Niall makes his way quickly to his bedroom, tugging of his clothes as he crosses the room. 

Harry has rolled onto his side of the bed a little so Niall lays in his arms giving his lips a quick kiss. Harry let's out a cute little snore nose wrinkling in his sleep, arms tightening around Niall. He has to use a lot of willpower to not wake him up for a quick fuck. 

He is very proud of himself. 

Xxxxxxx

When Niall wakes up he reaches out for Harry to find his side of the bed empty and cold. He pouts then rolls over to the other side reaching out for the twins cot to find that empty too. He pouts even more, flopping onto his back. 

There was a load of noise from outside. The workers putting the finishing touches to all of Harry's demands. 

He was getting married today.   
Actual married.   
To the best person in the whole world. 

He sits up, noticing a note placed on Harry's  pillow. He picks it up, recognising Liam's messy writing. 

We have your husband to be.   
You can have him back when it's time to say 'I do'.   
Until then stay in your room, we will come to you.   
Love you.   
P. S this is Liam. Not a kidnapper. 

Niall snorts, dropping the note to the floor before getting out of bed. 

Thank god he had a en suite or he would piss himself. 

"Being held prisoner on my wedding day." Niall does his business then goes back to the bed to get his phone to let Liam know he was awake. He dressed into a pair of grey jogging bottoms and Harry's white top then sits on the bed. He really hopes Liam brings him tea and toast. 

The door opens a few minutes later and Harry's sister and mum come into the room holding a twin each.

"Hey! When did you two get here?" Niall rushes forward to kiss them each on the cheek, eagerly taking the twins from them so he can smoother them in kisses, not caring at all about the sticky breakfast mess on their faces. 

"Just in time to give my beautiful granddaughters breakfast." 

"And to see Liam have a meltdown because something was the wrong colour. It concerns me how anal that kids is." They are wearing long summer dresses, Gemma's yellow and Anna's purple, and they both look so happy. Niall is so excited to just have everyone he loves and who loves his family all together for today. 

" You both look beautiful." They both so a twirl, Gemma rolling her eyes and baring her teeth at Niall when she stops. She looks so much like Harry as she laughs and it makes a rush of effection wash over him. 

"Thank you, both of you, for welcoming me into your family so easily." Anne tuts, holding Niall's face in her hands. 

"Thank you for loving my son and putting that smile back on his face. He is the type that deserves love and as long as your are giving him that love you also have us."

"Yeah kid, no take backs." 

"Not a kid." Gemma gasps, holding her hand to her chest. 

"Oh no mum, we better go tell Harry this one is not a kid anymore. Wedding will probably be off, shame."Anne swats at Gemma as she cackles loudly. 

"Ignore her, she is just jealous she only attracts old men." 

"It's true Niall, wish I could bag me a teenager like my dear brother. Life goals." Niall glares, but his face is still nothing but fond as Anne users them out of the room leaving Niall alone with the twins. 

He walks over to the window, placing a kiss on each head as he looks down into the paddock. 

He can see Harry walking around with Louis and Zayn trailing behind him. River and Macy are further up talking to some of the workmen, who no doubt had their work cut out for them with that lot being in charge. 

"We got lucky hey girls." He jiggles them both about to make them laugh. 

"You are both far to cute, I can't even cope guys" 

There is a soft knock on the bedroom door and Niall turns ready to greet whatever family member has arrived this time. 

His dad slips into the room, Greg standing right behind him. 

Niall grips the twins tighter, already feeling his eyes prickle with tears. 

"Hey baby bro." Six years had changed his brother a lot. He looks so much older, more like their dad. 

"Hey." Niall moves forwards, Bobby reaching out to take the twins as he passes. 

He holds his brother as hard as he can, face pressed into his neck. 

"God, you are like a proper man now. And getting married. I'm so proud of you Niall." Niall keeps himself tucked into Greg as he cries, so overwhelmed to have his brother here. 

He can barely even remember the anger he felt towards him when he left and has no idea why they let it go so many years without talking to each other again. Niall was annoyed with himself, they lost their mum they sound have known how important time was. 

"Thank you for inviting me today." Niall has not really thought about it at the time. When him and Harry had been sat at the kitchen table writing out the invites that Harry and spent weeks making himself. Without even thinking about what it would mean he wrote out one for his brother and then as a last thought put a couple of baby photos of the twins in.   
Greg's reply was the first one he had received. 

"I'm so sorry I left it this long." Niall steps back wiping at his face, Greg doing the same with a small laugh. 

"These my stunning nieces." Niall turns to Bobby, taking Rebecca from him first and passing her to Greg. 

She looks up at him, mouth open with a big wet smile and shoves her hand onto his face. 

"This is Rebecca, she likes to grab stuff."

"I can tell. Hello beautiful lady, its very nice to meet you." Niall gets Darcy from where she had escaped his dad and was rolling around on the bed. 

"This is Darcy, the naughty one." Greg moves Rebecca about until he can safety take Darcy, getting emotional as he holds them both. 

"Jeez Ni, your like an actual Dad. I'm an uncle. This is just so crazy. And with Harry. Never thought that would have happened. Mum's weird friend who brought cake round all the time."

"He is not weird Greg, you're weird. He was polite."

"Yeah bet dad thought he was polite when he found out what he had been doing with you. Wish I had been around for that one." Niall scoffed ignoring the urge to kick his ankles. 

"Never thought I would be so happy to hear you two bickering. It's only been a few minutes boys." They both turn to Bobby, face wet with tears as he watches then. 

"Aww, no Da don't cry." 

"Yeah, when you cry it's always really heartbreaking. You have the saddest cry."

"I do not!" 

"You do! Your face goes all crumbled and you get really into it."

"Its true dad." 

"You know what, i take it back. I prefer you both apart ya all a lot bloody nicer." Niall catches Greg's eye and winks before throwing himself at his dad for a hug. 

Xxxxxx

"Uncle Niall! Your house is so big and you can have horses and bunnies and Uncle Harry's mummy made me a pretty bow for my hair and Daddy said I can wear a princess dress and have flowers and that you're going to be bride! I missed you to the moon and back!" Rae jumps on the bed, body slamming into Niall's sending him falling backward. Elliott comes in a lot calmer, clambering up the bed and crawling his way over to them River is laughing by the doorway, Nolan standing by her feet with his fingers curled around his mums for support. 

"I miss you too! And my little El's, and this little man too, bring him here I hardly saw him yesterday." River picks Nolan up and throws him on the bed, getting in herself to lay with Niall on the pillows. 

"Thought I should bring the monsters to see you before it's time for us all to get dressed." 

"Thanks. You're all so mean shutting me up here." Niall slings his arm around Rivers shoulder both of them watching the kids rolls around the end of the bed. 

"Just make it special babe, your going to be so excited to see him now."

"I would have been anyway. He goes to the bog and I get excited to see him." River looks up at him, face screwed up. 

"You're pathetic. Give me the telly remote to myself and a glass of wine over a man any day." Niall laughs kissing the top of her head. 

"You got a little man already." They both fall into silence watching the kids again. Niall is once again hit with his thankful he is for his life and his family. 

He wishes his mum was here to make it that much more complete. She would have been in her element today, running around after Niall and all the kids making sure it was perfect. 

"I miss my mum."  
"Of course you do love. I bet she is here though, watching it all and feeling so proud."  
"You think so?" River takes his hand, feet tucking under his knee.   
"Of course. We are all proud so I can only imagine how she feels. You deserve all this, you and Harry, you both deserve to have it all. There is no way she is not standing right by you two today." 

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"I'm banned from looking at your face, which is like the worse thing to be banned from."Niall laughs as Harry hand appeared around the side of the door. 

After a lot of nagging Niall had managed to convince Louis to bring Harry up, as long as they stayed on opposite sides of the door. 

Niall takes his hand, finger brushing over his engagement ring. 

"I love you so much Harry. I just want to get out there already and marry you."

"Just another hour baby. We are all going to get dressed now, most the guest are here." 

"How come I got locked up here and you got to be downstairs with everyone."

"Cause I got my arse out of bed first. You snooze you lose." Niall rest his head against the door, cheeks almost hurting with how much he has been smiling since Harry has been near him again. 

"How are my girls behaving? I miss them too." 

"With Greg. He has hardly put them down. How was that? Seeing him again" 

"Really good. I shouldn't have left it so long. Need to make sure I spend some proper time with him before he goes home."

"We can go see him soon and you can show me where you grew up. I would love to see all the places they make you, you."

"You make me, me." He hears Harry sigh, his hand tightening around Niall's. 

"I love you so much baby boy. Want to touch you better then this." 

"PG guys." Niall rolls his eyes at Louis voice, raising his middle finger in the air. 

"I know what you are doing Irish."

"No you don't."

"Yes I do, I can feel it. Fuck you too by the way." 

"Shut up lou." Harry speaks up, shuffling against the door. 

"I should go get dressed, Liam and Zayn will be up with your stuff soon. Can't wait to see you. Next time we kiss it will be as husbands." Niall closes his eyes, thinking he could possible be about to cry again. 

"I can't wait, love you." 

"Love you." Harry squeezes his hand again then let's go. Niall presses against the door listening to his footsteps until he can't hear them anymore. 

Then he flops back on the bed and let's himself have a little cry 

Xxxxx

Niall adjust his tie, looking in the mirror at Liam's reflection as he styles his hair. Zayn is lounging on the bed with only his suit trousers on, unbuckled, playing around with his phone. 

"Z, you going to get dressed?We need to stay on schedule."

"Stop going on about the schedule loser." 

"I'm  best man to both grooms, that's a responsibility right there, if things go wrong I could be blamed." 

"It's not going to go wrong just because I'm not dressed yet. You have had me doing loads just leave me for a second. I'm chilling."

"Chilling? You can't just chill. It's not a day for chilling." Zayn scoffs dropping his phone onto the bed. 

"I don't think Niall wants his whole wedding to be a stress fest. If he was worried about my half naked state he would have said so. Now I shall repeat what I have said maybe a thousand time today, stop being a loser." 

"Hey Li?" Niall cuts in, trying not feel to fond over hearing these to fight again. "Can you go check on Harry and Lou, make sure they are running on time. Knowing Louis he has cut the butt cheeks out of Harry's trousers." Niall almost feels bad for saying that when Liam's face falls onto a look of distress. 

"I didn't even think to check on Louis. Oh god he could have done so much damage in this time." Liam rushes out of the room, shouting Louis name as he runs down the hallway. 

Niall turns to Zayn, eyebrow raised.   
"You are mean, he just wants it to be a good day."

"And it will be, but not because of his stupid schedule and plans, it will be perfect because you and Harry are ending it as husbands." Zayn gets up from the bed standing in front of Niall. 

"You look very handsome." Niall and Harry had picked simple, matching black suits. Liam, Zayn and Louis were wearing matching blue. 

"How about we get you dressed so I can feel ridiculously inadequate next to you." Zayn frowns hand smoothing over Niall's shirt. 

"Never feel inadequate. You are always the best, most important person in the room." Niall turns to get Zayn's shirt of the hanger, holding it out for him to slip his arms into the sleeves. 

"Have the kids been behaving today?"

"Yeah, Rae is obsessed with the twins. They are so beautiful Ni, and so happy. Natural dad you." 

"Nah, I feed them cookies most the time." Niall buttons up Zayn's shirt before reaching behind him again for the tie. 

"Well, explains why they are so happy I guess. Cookies are the best man. Especially the ones Harry makes, I say marry him just for them." Niall hums in agreement, looping the tie around Zayn's neck. 

He was going to marry him. He was going to marry Harry, like now. 

"Can I ask you something?" 

"Can ask me anything Z, you know that." Niall tightens up Zayn's tie, folding his collar down around it. 

"Your first day of school, do you think that if I was the person to pick you up instead of push you down we might have like, maybe been together?" Niall pauses, hands pressed to Zayn's chest. 

"Maybe not now. I'm not trying to say you would be marrying me instead because Harry is it for you and it would have always been him. But maybe we would have been each others first. First kiss, first time, first love. It would have made things different. If I was nice to you." 

" I think that a lot of things had the potential to make things different now. Even between me and Harry. If my mum didn't die, would I have grown closer to him? If Rebecca was still alive, would he have ever looked at me the way he does now or would it still just be her? What if I decided to never come back from America, would something else have intervened? So yeah, it could have been different. But you didn't pick me up and this is the way it was meant to be." 

"Yeah, I know." Zayn steps back, Niall hands falling from him. "I'm glad it happened this way really. I don't think we would be as close as we are now. And you really were made for Harry. I think I was made for Matt too." Niall feels sad as he watches Zayn put on his jacket and fluff up his hair a little. 

He wants him to have the life back he deserved. He doesn't want him to be alone and heartbroken. 

"I guess-" Zayn huffs giving up on his hair. "I guess I just wish your first thoughts of me were different. Something other then thinking I was an arsehole." 

"Zayn, that's not ac-" 

"It doesn't matter." Zayn cuts him off standing back in front of him with a smile on his face.   
"What matters is that you are getting married and I am going to cry so be prepared for that. I know you keep hearing this but you really do deserve this. I hope you have the best marriage possible and the happiest life." Zayn leans down, hand resting on Niall hip as he presses his lips to the corner of Niall's mouth. Niall turns his head, brushing their lips the slightest before stepping back. 

Zayn keeps his gaze to the floor as he quickly leaves the room. 

Xxxxxxxxxx

When Niall walks down the stairs half an hour later he can hear music playing softly from outside and the steady chatter of their guest. 

He is nervous as hell and he has no idea why. It could go completely wrong and Niall knows he will still end the day as Harry's husband. 

His dad is waiting for him at the bottom, tears in his eyes as he holds his hand out for Niall. 

"Do you have any idea how happy your mother would have been right now." 

"Dad." Niall voice wobbles and once again he finds himself crying. How do girls manage this and keep their makeup looking perfect? 

"I'm sorry I don't want to make you cry. But I haven't been able to stop thinking about her today, even more so with you and Greg being together. She would have loved it and she would have been so happy for you. I would have loved to have got the chance to see her face as she watched you get married."

"Me too Da, I really miss her today. I'm lucky to still have you though, I love you." 

"Love you too son." They hug and Niall is glad to have the moment. A hug from his dad was just what he needed to ground him a little. 

They pull apart only when Lisa come bustling into the room to attach their buttonholes. 

"Liam will have a fit if you had forgotten these." Niall laughs fondly, he bet Liam was out there having kittens right about now waiting for something to go wrong. 

Lisa fusses over him for a few more moments, straightening his tie and smoothing down his jacket before moving a few stands of his hair about. Generally doing what she could to leave him Niall thinks. 

Eventually she steps back, hand covering her mouth as she looks at him. He wonders if this makes her miss her son more. The knowledge that she never got the chance to see him fall in love and get married like he probably would have done if a bunch of kids did not decided he was better off dead then gay. 

She clears her throat, smoothing down her own clothes before turning to go back outside. 

"Where do you think your going?" Lisa stops, looking back at Niall confused. 

"To take my seat love, music is about to start and you need to be ready." Niall turns, shaking his head as he links his arm with his dad's and pulls them over to Lisa, holding out his other arm. 

"I got another arm don't I?" 

"You want me to?" Niall is sure he can hear his dad sniffling next to him again. Without taking her eyes from Niall Lisa pulls out a tissue and hands it to Bobby. 

"Please. I would be honoured to have you walk me down the aisle too." Lisa takes a deep breath in to collect herself before taking Niall's arm just as the music starts. 

When Niall steps out for the first time he can't really see Harry yet but the sight of everyone and all the stuff Harry had managed to put together had him beaming already. 

They walk over flower petals, white and mint green fabric flapping around them as the make their way up the paddock that Harry had completely transformed for the ceremony. 

He spots the kids, the boys in their little suits and Rae in her pink glittery dress. Rae is jumping up down waving as Niall passes, he gives her a small wave back. 

Then his eyes land on Harry and everything else just melts away. He looks stunning, suit clinging to him in all the right places. His smile is big, teeth on show as he watches Niall walk towards him, tears already steaming down his face. 

Louis is stood slightly behind him, grinning with his hand clasps together in front of him. Liam is next to Harry, twins dressed up and sat in their pushchair by his side. Niall barely registers them, he just sees Harry. He would be happy to spend the rest of his life just seeing Harry. 

He doesn't think he has ever looked so beautiful as he does in this moment, and Niall doesn't think he has ever seen such a look of love on his face before. 

He kisses both Bobby and Lisa and the moment they both pass him to Harry feel so much bigger then he thought it would. The second his hand leaves his dad's and slides into Harry's, Niall feels more at home then ever before. 

Harry let's put a shaky breath, taking a small step closer to him. Niall has never wanted to kiss him more then this very moment. 

"I missed you, you look beautiful." Niall blushes looking down at his feet. 

"Miss you too" Louis clears his throat, looking thrilled to finally have his moment. 

"Good afternoon, welcome to the most important moment in the lives of this couple.

We invite you to leave behind the worries and concerns of every day life and join us in the celebration of their marriage. This is an opportunity for us to share not only in the joy of Harry and Niall's love but also to reaffirm and appreciate the love and the friendship we experience in our own lives.

May we all celebrate by being fully present during our short time together."Louis looks to Harry to check he is happy. Harry smiles and nods before sharing a look with Niall's. 

"Can you two just hold hands for me please?" Niall and Harry both do as they are asks, hands held tightly between them. Louis cradles their hands in his, clearing his throat again. 

"These hands are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love, that hold you on your wedding day.

These are the hands that will work along side yours as you build your future together. 

These are the hands that will passionately love you and care for you throughout the years. 

These are the hands that will hold you when fear or grief torments your mind and with the slightest touch, will comfort you like no other. 

These are the hands that will give you strength when you struggle, support and encouragement to chase down your dreams. 

These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children, and help keep your family together as one. 

These are the hands that will, countless times, wipe the tears from your eyes, tears of sorrow, and tears of joy. 

And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled with age, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch-a touch from these hands." Louis brings their hands up for a quick kiss before stepping back with a grin seemingly please with the crying couple in front of him. 

"Bloody hell Lou." Harry wipes his eyes on his sleeve. 

"Harry and Niall will now share their vows. Niall you first." Niall hands are shaking as he pulls the paper that his vows are written on out of his pocket. He has gone over them a thousand times so knows them by heart, but he feels more secure with them there for him to see. 

He take a moment to wipe his tears and steady his breathing before starting, eyes never leaving Harry's as he talks. 

"I could never have imagined I would be in this place. A place where I get to look into the eyes of my best friend and pledge to you my love. You are the sweetest, most loving, caring and kind person I have ever known and I have no doubt that you make me a better man and father. You believe in me and have shown me how to love with unconditional acceptance and every day you reaffirm that you are my soul mate. Together we are an unbreakable pair, bound by our love. I'm not sure that a lifetime is long enough for me to return all that you have given me but i promise to spend my days by your side. To inspire you, laugh with you, cherish you, confirm you, share your dreams and grow with you. I believe in what we are and I will always love you with every beat of my heart, and even though i'm unsure about most things in life, I am certain that i love you and will continue to love you forever." His voice wobbles and breaks more then he would like, and Harry is crying like a baby which makes him want to stop and hug him but he finishes. 

Liam leans forward and holds a tissue out for Harry who takes it with a laugh and drys his face. 

"Harry, when your ready mate."Harry tucks the tissue into his sleeve before getting his own piece of paper out. 

"Niall, you are my dream come true, you are my world, you are the joy in my heart, the laughter in my voice and the smile on my face. We compliment each other so beautifully and together we can face anything, we can be comforted in knowing that we will never have to face it alone. The first time you kissed me I knew that we shared something special, and it was not long after that i fell in love with you and realised that you are the one that i was meant to spend my life with, i could see it in your eyes. I could feel it in my heart. Your are the most incredible man i have ever known and you make me feel amazing every single day. I am so excited, and completely elated to be standing her with you today. You are the love of my life, my best friend, my soulmate, my everything, and I promise to you that I will always love you with my whole heart. I promise that I will always be there for you in good times and bad and may the stormy days we encounter and the trials we face only ever make us stronger. Today I give myself to you, to encourage and inspire. To laugh with you and cry with you. To comfort you and seek comfort in return. When life seems easy and when it seems hard, when our love is simple and when it is an effort I will cherish you and always hold you to in the highest regard. These things I give to you. Falling for you was not like falling at all, it was like walking into a house and suddenly knowing you are home. You are my home."

Niall let's out a sob, not caring at all for how ugly the sound is. He is so in love with this man and he must be the luckiest man alive to have him love him right back. 

"I want to kiss you, like a load." Harry grins, the tip of his ears turning red. 

"Soon." Louis rubs his hands together bringing the tips of his fingers to his lips. 

"I'm not going to cry. I'm not." He takes a few deep breaths before clapping his hands emotions gathered and sorted. 

"Right Harry, Niall I ask of you both- Do you promise to choose each other everyday, to love each other in word and deed?" 

"We do." Both Niall and Harry's smiles grow. 

"Do you promise to recognise one another as equals, and support one another in your goals and wises for the future?" 

"We do." Both are now grinning so wide it's hard to talk. Long gone are Niall's nerves now he just wants to laugh or shout or jump into Harry's arms. Maybe all three. 

"Do you promise to share you thoughts, and feelings, and concerns with each other, and be open and honest at all times?" 

"We do." 

"Right, Liam do your thing."Liam practically leaps forward holding up the wedding rings and Niall has no doubt that the sound he hears is Zayn snorting a laugh into his hands. 

"Thanks kid. Keen." Liam blushes taking his place back next to the twins. 

Louis holds the rings out on the palm of his hand. 

"Harry you first love." Harry takes Niall's ring, sniffling as fat tears roll down his cheeks. Niall can't wait to be able to kiss and hold him properly. 

"With this ring, I give you my heart, I promise from this day forward you shall not walk alone, may my heart be you shelter and my arms be your home." Niall whole body is shaking as Harry slips the rings on his finger.

It's so surreal suddenly, having Harry slide his wedding ring onto his finger. He has a wedding ring. 

"Niall now you." Niall has no idea how he is going to be able to talk. He is feeling so much, so much happiness and love and it's like he could float. 

"With this ring, i give you my heart, i promise from this day forward you shall not walk alone, may my heart be you shelter and my arms be your home." It's mostly a disaster but Niall's suddenly overflow of emotions seems to set everyone off and the sound of snuffing and nose blowing is all around them. 

Liam's hand comes up to squeeze his dad's shoulder. 

This is the moment.   
Louis is about to say the words Niall has been dreaming off, even back when he was seventeen and laying out on a beach in bloody Australia. This is what he has always dreamed of. 

"I am so honoured, and also very thankful to the Internet, to pronounce you husband and husband. Kiss your man Hazza." They both move quickly, lips smashing together.   
Its wet and sloppy and perfect. It's their first kiss as husbands and Niall will never forget this moment. 

Harry picks him up and spins him around, dipping his tongue past Niall's lips as everyone around them claps and cheers. 

Niall has about five seconds to get his bearings once Harry places him down before they are tackled by Zayn, River and Macy, the rest closely following to join the group hug. 

"You got fucking married guys." Niall searches for Harry on the mess of body parts and manages to press their lips back together again. 

Xxxxxx

They decided against a formal sit down meal and instead wanted the party to start straight away.   
The chairs are moved to the side and the caterers bring out food to place on tables around the edge of the paddock and then the music is turned up. 

Niall was pretty happy with this choice as everyone was relaxed, laughing and mingling together nicely. 

Niall had taken a few minutes to slip inside to face time both Maggie and Sonya who couldn't make it today. He would have to remember to send them a recording of the ceremony. 

When he comes back out he takes a moment to watch Harry dancing with Louis sisters, the oldest set of twins holding Rebecca and Darcy. 

Liam is spinning Macy around and Louis is bending down talking to Cassie's stomach, Cassie looks a few seconds away from thumping him over the head. River is helping Rae and Elliott get some good. 

Niall heads over to Zayn, who is leaning against the drinks table. His suit jacket is off, sleeves rolled up to his elbow. 

He has a cigarette tucked behind his ear. It always reminds him of Zayn in high school when he does that. 

"My first thought of you was not that you were an arsehole." Zayn raises his eyebrow , taking a swig from his bottle of beer. 

"What was it then?" 

"The day before I started I came into the school with my mum to be shown around and meet some teachers. We were being walked back to reception when I saw you for the first time. You were stood by the big noticeboard, pinning something to it. You looked over for a second but I don't think you really saw me. I thought you were the most beautiful boy I had ever seen. That was my first thought. And yeah, we would have been really good together."

"Really?" Something in Zayn seems to relax a little, the smile on his face seems that bit more real. Niall can tell he is sad, will be sad for a long time still. He also knows that things will be OK for him at some point. 

"You're going to feel all the good things again, because you are too good not to. Whether it's Matt or someone else, you will get all this again and you will be really happy. Until then, don't shut me out. You call me and you talk to me and you tell me why you are sad. And you bloody come and see me when I can't get to you. You ignore me again and I will cut your balls off OK?" Zayn laughs, pulling the cigarette out from behind his ear.

"Thank you, and I promise I will be better." Niall nods, satisfied that Zayn will keep his word. 

"Right, good. Love you dickhead." 

"Yeah, whatever." 

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Harry! This really is not the best idea." Harry crowds Niall into the barn, quickly looking over his shoulder to see if anyone had noticed them sneak away. 

"It's the best idea. All ideas that end with me fucking you are the best idea."

"My dad is just outside!" Harry waggles his eyebrows, backing Niall up against the wall. 

"Well, this daddy is right in here and he says get naked."Niall splutters, hitting Harry across the shoulder. 

"I may never have sex with you ever again if you ever refer to yourself as my daddy again." 

"Lies, only been my husband for a couple of hours and you are already lying. True colours Ni." Niall rolls his eyes as Harry turns him around pushing his back to bend him towards the wall. 

"Oh, wait. Wait." Niall looks over his shoulder raising his eyebrow.   
"What?"   
"This is our first time having sex as husbands and I'm bending you over in a barn?" Niall shrugs turning back to the wall bracing his hands.   
"I like everything you just said. You got lube on you though right? Probably should use a condom."  
"Its our first time having sex as a married couple and I'm going to have to use a condom." Niall laughed quietly pushing away from the wall, spinning round to Harry. 

"OK, clearly not the right time to have sex. Still want to come?" 

"Well, yeah." Niall drops to his knees hands going to the button of Harry's trousers. 

"No, babe." Harry reaches down to stop him but Niall swats his hand away. 

"I want to."

"I'm fine honestly. You don't have-" 

"I know I don't have to. I want to." Harry hesitates, eyes searching Niall's face for any sign of discomfort before nodding for him to carry on. 

Niall undoes Harry trousers tugging them down to his knees with his boxers. He takes Harry's dick into his hand, moving his fist up and down slowly as he kissed around his belly. 

He had not given Harry a blow job since Landon. Had tried a couple of times and ended up panicking and locking himself away. 

He didn't want that feeling to be apart of his marriage. He wanted to be free of that. 

"Just don't like, move OK. Let me be in control. And maybe don't come in my mouth." Harry nods, pushing his hands into Niall's hair. 

"Of course baby." Niall smiles up at him then wraps his lips around his tip. Harry's breath hitches, hand tightening in Niall's hair. 

Niall takes a breath in before sliding his mouth down. He goes too far pulling off again with a gasp, shaking his head when Harry goes to step back. 

"I'm fine." He goes slowly this time, let's himself enjoy the weight of Harry on his tongue, the sound of his breathing, his muscles tensing under his fingertips. 

He presses his tongue to the underside of Harry's cock as he drags his mouth back, pausing to lick and taste at the head of his cock before going back down. 

Harry moans, hand pulling and stroking over Niall's hair as he repeats the movement speeding up and managing to sink down a tiny bit further each time, making sure to stay at his own pace even as Harry starts to breath heavier and quicker Niall's name tumbling from his lips between pants. 

Niall cups his balls in one hand, the other gripping Harry's hip as he rolls his balls in his hand. 

"Baby, I'm going to come, pull off" Harry rushes out pushing Niall's head gently. Harry drops to his knees, kissing Niall as he wraps a hand around his own cock and quickly tugs at himself, body convulsing forward as he spill into his hand. 

Harry looks at Niall for a second, both breathing heavy, then gently he pushes him down onto his back using his clean hand to pull down his trousers, Niall clumsily helping. 

"Such a good boy." Niall's head falls back as Harry wraps his come covered hand around his cock, slowly moving his fist up and down teasing the head with his thumb. 

Niall bites down on his lip to keep himself quite, too aware of everyone just outside the barn to really let himself go. 

Harry doesn't take his eyes off him once and it makes Niall feel like he is on fire. His skin prickling with his stare as he works his hand over him. 

"Getting close." Niall pulls his knees up, gasping at the feeling of his stomach tightening, building up towards his orgasm. Harry grips him tighter and twists his wrist a little making Niall shake beneath him. 

He wonders if it will always be like this when Harry touches him. If after more years have passed the intensity of even a simple kiss could start to fade. Or is this how it will stay, will he always be made to feel like its almost too much. Like Harry sets him alight from the inside.

"Fuck, fuck Harry." Niall closes his eyes as he starts to come, mouth open in a silent moan and his fingers pulling at his hair as Harry slowly brings him back down. 

Niall blinks his eyes open, looking down to see Harry cleaning them up with his pocket square. 

"Liam is going to kill you." Harry snorts, throwing the piece of material to the side. 

"Let's not mentions my kids name while I'm cleaning our come of you please."

"Technically you had already cleaned it before I said his name." Harry shots him a look as he gets to his knees, pulling Niall up with him. 

"You OK?"Niall nods, wrapping his arms around Harry 's neck, fingers pushing into the bottom of his hair. 

"You done well, proud of you baby."Niall blushes hiding his face into Harry's neck. 

"Thanks. I know it's not like how it used to be, but it could be one day." Harry leans back, hands cupping Niall's face. 

"You know I don't care. Just want you to be comfortable." 

"Hmm, well comfortable for me would be getting off this floor, help ya husband up." Harry pulls Niall up, beaming at his title. 

"Husband." He giggles, tugging his trousers up as Niall does the same. 

"Yo! Stop eating each others arses and get out here! Dad is doing shots! You lot have made him wild." Niall raises his eyebrows at Harry. 

"I don't know what I'm more baffled by. My brother mentioning us eating arses or  dad doing shots."

"Me either, but let's get out before we miss it." 

Xxxxx

"Hello you." Niall looks up from his beer as Anne sits down next to him, straighten out her dress. 

"Alright love, having fun?" 

"I certainly am. That lot are an endless sours of entertainment." She nods over to where Harry, Louis and Louis' family are dancing to the cha cha slide. 

"Yeah, that's one way to describe them." Anne chuckles, taking Niall's hand in hers. 

"I'm going to have to go,seeing as I'm too old for this time of night."

"Nonsense." Anne smiles, patting Niall's hand. 

"I just wanted to talk to you before I left, to say thank you." Niall puts his beer down turning his body to face Anne more. 

"What for? Seems I should be thanking you for raising me such a wonderful husband."

"Well you are very welcome for that, I enjoyed every second of doing it. Apart from his naked stage, that got very awkward when he started to refuse to put clothes on to go to school and would run out the front door completely starkers." Niall laughs, head flung back. He could picture that so clearly. He was still surprised Harry put clothes on even now. 

"I do need to thank you though. You know, when Harry first told me about you I was so worried about him. I thought maybe he was still grieving Rebecca and was not thinking straight. A sixteen year old boy, his sons best friend. I worried people would think badly of him, I worried he would lose Liam, I worried you were using him." Niall goes to protest by Anne shushes him, placing her hand on his cheek. 

"I know lovely, but I didn't know you then did I. That's why I took so long to come meet you. I thought it would pass, that he would realise it was a mistake or you would get bored and leave. Then when you did leave, I have never seen him so sad Niall. Not even when Rebecca died. And he just never got over you. Each year I thought, this will be it, he will be OK this year. That's how I knew he really did love you, because he was never OK. Then you came back to him and I knew I had to come see you for myself. If my son and my grand baby loved you so much then I thought there must be something special about you." Anne brushed her thumb over Niall's cheek, her eyes watering as she spoke. 

"And there was. It didn't take me long at all to see the love you had for them both. You look at my son like he hung the moon for you Niall, and you have made him smile everyday. You have given him back so much and I can never repay you for the life he has now, with you. You make it more magical and beautiful each day. I am blessed to have you as my son in law." Niall sniffs backs tears, covering Anne's hand with his own. 

"He does the same for me. He does so much more for me." Anne smiles, leaning forward to kiss Niall's forehead. 

"You two, you're a once in a lifetime thing. Treasure every second." 

"I will. I do." 

"I know. Now I really must go, enjoy the rest of your night. Don't keep them girls up too late or you will have hell tomorrow." Niall let's out a teary laugh, looking over to the twins who are playing with Zayn and Rae on the grass. 

"Love ya sweetheart." 

"Love you too."Anne gives him another kiss before making her way into the dancing crowd to say goodbye to everyone else. 

Niall laughs to himself as everyone surrounded her for hugs and kisses before Gemma pulls her away, blowing kisses to Harry as they go to the car. 

Niall takes a few more moments to enjoy his own company, soaking in everything that had happened today. 

Becoming Harry's husband.   
Not just someone's husband but Harry's. Its so surreal to feel as lucky as he does

And everyone was so happy for them, which made it feel even more special. 

He looks back over to Zayn, playing with the twins and talking to Rae. He had a genuine smile on his face, the first one he had worn there since last night that Niall believed was actually real.   
The twins seems besotted with him already, not that Niall could blame them. He was kinda besotted with him too. 

Liam, Macy and River were all by the food table, laughing about something that had Liam going bright red before throwing a bread roll at Rivers head. He was glad Liam had loosened up a little and was having fun. 

Nolan and Elliott where nowhere to be seen, but neither was Cassie so Niall figured they had given in to sleep and Cassie was dealing with it. 

He looked back over to Rebecca and Darcy again. They were good sleepers and Niall and Harry had gotten lucky because as soon as they put them down they stayed in their cots with no fuss. But they could defiantly stay awake way longer then the rest of them if left to play. Niall would have to put them to bed soon but he was enjoying having them crawl round in their pretty dresses too much at the moment. 

"Alright baby bro." Greg drops down next to Niall, passing him a fresh beer.   
"Not off to dance with the husband?" Niall shrugs, popping the cap off his drink.   
"Nah, enjoying just watching." Greg hums, a smile creeping up on his face.   
"How did that happen anyway? You and old man styles." Niall kicks him in the shin, glaring. 

"He is not old, you always acted like he was dad's age. He is not even old enough to actually be Liam's dad. Well actually, I guess he could be but that would have been young and so weird. How do kids that young even think about it, you know there are so many kids under the age of sixteen becoming parents now. Scary." 

"I see the art of you getting distracted halfway through talking has not gone."

"Oh shut up. We just got closer after ma died. He was there for me, made me feel normal and like it was going to be OK. Supported me, cared." Greg nodded, fingers tapping on his bottle. 

"Well, guess its good he was about then." 

"How are things for you back home?" Greg leans back, crossing his foot over his knee. 

"Good. Really good. Got a girl now, think she may be the one you know. She is bloody perfect. And the jobs going well. Might be able to buy a bigger place soon. Not as big as this, flashy pants, but a proper family home." Niall feels so happy for his brother and so relived that things are going well for him. 

Leaving it so long to fix things between them will always be one of his biggest regrets, especially  with Greg making it clear he was ready years ago. He was willing to make up for it now though. 

"That's great Greg. I will have to come visit. Meet Mrs perfect." 

"Oh she will love that." Greg laughs, shaking his head "She is a fan of yours, knew who you were before she knew me. I even lied about my name for a bit to make sure she was being real. It would be great to have you back home. Show Harry the Irish way." 

"He would enjoy that. Need to get my girls over there regularly too."

"They are beautiful Ni, told you that already I'm sure but man have I fell in love with them already. Thought you were crazy when dad told me you wanted to adopt, but it suites you, suites both of you. And now I have seen you both together I can see why you didn't want to wait. Real deal you two." 

"We hear that a lot. We know it too, fucking lucky is what I am." Greg watches him, lazy smile on his face before nodding towards the twins and Zayn again. 

"That's the Malik kid then. Dad said he looked like a model from one of mums old magazines. He was right." 

"Yes, and he is a good one so be nice. He is important to us." Greg peels a piece of soggy label off his bottle flicking it towards Niall. It lands on his knee and he flicks it off shooting Greg an annoyed look. 

"I don't like what he done to you. If I was here I would have kicked his arse."

"Yeah well you weren't here and he has more then made up for it. He is family. He would do anything for me, you should be glad I have him." 

"Alright. Dad speaks very highly of him too so he must be a good one." 

"One of the best."Greg shuffles in his seat, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees, bottle dangling in his fingers. He runs his hand over his eyes letting out a puff of breath.

"Ni, I'm really sorry for just leaving the way I did." Niall shrugs, looking away. He meets Harry's eyes, smiling at him and getting a wink in return. 

"It's fine. We all had to deal with it in our own way."

"Yeah but it was wrong. Mum asked me to take care of you but instead I just left. It was just so hard waking up in that house everyday knowing she was gone. We watched her die there, I just needed to leave."

"Yeah. I get that." Niall still struggled being at his dad's house and didn't go there that often because of it. He could understand Greg's need to leave, he just didn't understand at the time why it had to be so far away. Until he himself hid out in America for three years, then he understood. 

"I could have been a better brother, moved somewhere close. It just seemed like there were more bad memories then good but back home, Ireland is nothing but good memories. I feel closer to her there, the mum that I wanted to remember. You were so angry and upset, it was hard to find the time to explain it to you. I wish I stuck around longer so I left with us in a better place." Niall puts his hand on Greg's shoulder, squeezing it before pulling him closer. 

"It's all good now. We can move past it, talk more and take some time out to spend together. I got no bad feelings towards you. Life's good man, and its to fucking short to be angry over stupid shit. I want my girls to know ya as well as they can. And any future kids." 

"I want that too. God can't believe how grown up you are. Really proud of you bro. Went out travelling the world and got that dream job you used to rabble on about. Mum would have never stopped bragging about you if she was still here. Woman would have drove me crazy." Greg got up, patting Niall's knee as he stood. 

" I read ya books by the way. Dad made sure to send them to me like I couldn't go to a shop myself. Does he realise that by reading them he is pretty much reading about you and Harry having sex? I had to skip a few pages Ni, learnt things I never needed to learn." Niall laughs, shaking his head. 

"I exaggerated." Greg raised his eyebrows pointing over to Harry. 

"That man oozes all things sexual. I doubt you exaggerated at all. Should probably have words with him ruining my innocent baby brother."

"Yeah sure, whatever. Your baby brother don't mind being ruined."

"Oh gross. Does Liam have to listen to this stuff. Bet he has a fit the little nerd."

"That's my step son you are talking about." 

"Oh god, poor boy. Don't spend the rest of his life winding him up." Niall chuckles taking a swig from his bottle. 

"I will try not to. But I actually am officially his step dad now. Probably my duty to remind him every now and then. Keep the respect i deserve." 

"I will make sure he knows its his duty and his right to slap you." Niall pouts dragging himself to his feet with a groan. 

"You are still no fun." 

"You are still a prat." 

Xxxxxxxx

The rest of the night passes far to quickly for Niall. Its full of eating and drinking and dancing with his girls and his new husband. 

Everywhere he turns there is someone smiling and laughing with him and Harry. 

There is so much joy and love in the air that by the time everyone starts to dwindle of to bed Niall's face hurts from the smile that has refused to go away all day and his stomach hurts from the amount of laughing he has done. Probably the amount of food and drink he has consumed too. 

Harry takes the twins to put them to bed, a sleepy Liam trailing behind him after slapping a wet kiss to Niall's cheeks and slurring something Niall had no chance of understanding. 

The paddock is a little wreaked so Niall wonders around picking up rubbish and dropped food as he waits for Harry to come back, keen to have some time alone with him before falling into bed.

He pauses at the alter thinking about the time Harry had spend weaving flower through the poles, determined it was a job he was doing himself and not handing over to someone else. He stands were he stood hours ago. It was a moment he will never forget. A moment that will have him floating around on cloud nine for days, weeks. 

"I married the fuck out of you today." Niall smiles, stomach doing a little swoop as he turns to Harry, baby monitor slipped into his shirt pocket. 

"Yeah you did." Harry closes the gap between them, hands sliding around Niall waist to grip at his bum. 

"It was not autumn and it was not in a castle, but you loved it right?" Niall goes up on his toes to press his lips lightly to Harry's. 

"I wouldn't have wanted to wait till Autumn and this place feels like the best kind of castle. Its our castle. I just wanted to marry you, the other stuff never mattered. This was perfect." 

"I agree. Perfection. You, the girls, this place, our life. It's all so perfect. And there is so much more to come. Watching the girls grow, anniversaries, cows, horses, dogs." Niall kisses Harry again to stop him listing off more animals. 

"More kids." He looks into Harry's eyes as he speaks, a nervous bubble in his stomach. They haven't really spoken about more kids. Plans about their future normally involved what to do around the house and how best to use the land around it. Niall was too aware that Harry could be done with kids to want to bring it up, but it was what he really wanted. 

"You want more kids?" Niall runs his hand up Harry's chest, biting down on his lip as he places his hand over the monitor, the soft sound of the twins breathing could just be heard. 

"I do. I really want some more. One would be fine of course but I understand if its too much with the twins. Two is a great number, three for you really even though Liam is an adult. Rebecca and Darcy are enough for me i swear, it's just been so nice giving them a home and loving them and I keep thinking about all these kids that don't have that and we have loads of love and space and we got the money and we enjoy being parents and I jus-" Harry catches Niall in another kiss, quickly deepening it. Niall groans hands gripping at Harry shirt, his toes tingling and curling in his shoes. 

"Want that too." Harry kisses down to his neck, biting down slightly before he pulls away grinning down at Niall.   
"I definitely want more kids with you. Want a big family and I want to wake up to you and them everyday. God Niall you don't even understand how much I want that. We are going to have the best life baby. You and I, the best life ever." Niall blinks back tears, resting his head on Harry's shoulder as they hug tightly. 

"I love you so much, husband."

"I love you too, husband." Harry takes his hand, stepping back. 

"Let's go to bed. Stare at our beautiful girls for way too long." Niall looks around at the mess still scattered around and figures he can get the others to help before they leave in the morning. Or bribe Rae with a ten pound note to fill a couple of bin bags for him. 

He nods once and let's Harry lead him out the paddock and across the driveway . 

He stops by the door and looks back once more. Harry presses a kiss to the side of his head then they both go inside the door closing quietly behind them.


End file.
